#pinprick

Sherlock fandom.

Needles and Pins

Sherlock has always been fascinated by sharp objects. When he was five or six, he stole some of his mother’s thinnest and sharpest needles and penetrated the skin on his fingertips without drawing blood. He felt no pain either. It was captivating. When his mother found out, there was drama and lectures about how he could’ve been injured. An endless tirade he grew tired of after trying to explain himself. He didn’t want to get hurt. It was just an experiment.

*** 

Both his parents and Mycroft believed his drug addiction had to do with his early experimentation with the needles. It obviously wasn’t. Sherlock was actually quite disappointed with his brother for even considering it. He wanted peace and quiet, from his own thoughts and his bullies. The numerous pinpricks on his arms told a tale of endless hours of despair, but also blissful silence.

***

Sherlock’s scars from being stitched together by John’s skilled doctor hands, he wore with pride. John was meticulous, the marks were barely visible. but Sherlock knew it pained John to mar his flawless skin. (John’s words, not his.)

It took him quite a while not to flinch when John kissed the evidence of Sherlock’s past abuse on the inside of Sherlock’s arms when they made love.

“They don’t hurt anymore, John,” Sherlock tried to reason with his best friend and lover.

“I know, my heart. Kissing them gives me comfort. It’s a way for me to soothe what I couldn’t when it happened. When I wasn’t there. When I didn’t know you…” John explained and went silent, holding Sherlock tight.

After that, Sherlock let John kiss the signs of his past without complaint or embarrassment. They were a part of him and the fact that John loved him despite of what they symbolised, was nothing short of a miracle.

spiky blue pony, an expert on sharp pointy things. it's Pokey Pierce!!