#peachesnet

He himself turns as well, knees bumping on yours, clad with denim jeans. The layers of clothing separating the skin contact is barely felt as electricity flows through your bloodstream. 

Years of repressing your feelings for your best friend, yet it still exist in your heart. Every time he’s near, your heart skips a beat. Even when he does nothing but breathe, his existence is enough for your mind to create chaos and the butterflies are having a party on the pit of your stomach. It is surprising that he never notices the change in your body language whenever he props his heavy and lean arm around your shoulder, or when he comes out from your back and wraps himself on your torso, or when he calls your name once he sees your figure five meters away from him. Everyone thinks that you are in a stable relationship with Vernon, but you always reply that it’s rather a stable friendship. 

He’s naturally caring when it comes to you, and it makes you wonder if he only does this because you are his important friend, or he also feels something for you. 

Vernon only wants happiness for you. So here you are with him, sitting on the kitchen stools of Choi Seungcheol’s party.

Your gaze rests on the plaid pattern of his over sized button down shirt, trying to avert your focus on his slightly exposed chest. Vernon lightly taps a finger on your knee, but you refuse to look up.

“Okay,” he sighs, placing his drink on the counter. He grabs both of your hands with his bigger ones, applying pressure on the tired fields of them. 

Your shoulders relax from the sensation of his fingers against your skin. “Okay what?”

“I need you to lower your standards and call that handsome guy who just gave you his number.” he says, rubbing circles on the back of your hand.

“I’m not calling Wen Junhui, okay?” you groan, throwing your head back. You hate it when Vernon attempts to set you up with guys, when you only want him and no else.

He looks perplexed from hearing the boy’s name from your lips. “You know him?”

Finally, you look at him directly, resisting the massive butterflies. His gaze is always soft, hazel brown eyes looking as innocent as ever, and he looks extra cute when he’s surprised, like now. 

“He’s in my Contemporary Arts class. He probably never sees me because I always sit at the back of the room.” you tiredly explain, lids slowly shutting down.

With this, he sighs and lets go of your hand. You almost reach for them again from the lost of his touch. “You’re going to die single, Y/N.” he shakes his head, taking another drink.

“I know.”

“You don’t have to be.” he whispers, looking down at his own lap.

“What did you say?”

“Oh, nothing.” he says, coaxing the lie. “You have morning classes tomorrow, right? Come on, I’ll walk you to your dorm.”

Vernon is by your side as you walk home. The road along seems so silent, shining lights from the posts are serving as your guide with him. Dragging your heavy feet as you walk together, he has both of his hands inside of the pocket of his jeans. Your eyes keep switching between your feet and his hands every time the night breeze blows on the exposed parts of your skin.

You two walk slowly, taking your time together.

“Hey,” you call him, his head turning slightly as he hums in response. “Can I hold your hand?”

Without a word, he takes your palm with his, warmth immediately transferring on your skin. He pulls you closer to him, sharing more of his body heat with you, and intertwines his fingers.

No wonder why everyone thinks you and him are in a relationship.

As an instinct, your free hand finds its way to grasp his upper arm, leaning your temple on the corner of his broad shoulder. Vernon sighs in content and comfort, having you close, safe and sound with him. No matter how many dates or guys he tries to set you up with, there is never a time he gets afraid of the thought of someone actually succeeding. As selfish as it may sound, sometimes he wishes for the set up dates to fail, so he can have you for his own.

But he’s too afraid to risk your built friendship with him.

So he stays silent as possible.

“I heard what you said earlier.” you whisper, closing your eyes for a few seconds.

Vernon bites his lip, squeezing your hands from his grip, and rubs circles with his thumb. His hand fits perfectly with yours. “You don’t really have to be.”

“You know, you should stop trying so hard to find someone for me. It’s time for you to be happy as well.” 

“No one is out there for me.” he replies, tapping and adding rhythm on your hand.

“I am.” 

Vernon stops on his track, so do you. As you peel yourself from him, he spins you so you’re facing his dashing figure. He looks down at you with fond expression. There’s a spark of hope in his eyes that he wishes you can’t see. 

“Do you love me, Y/N?”

Your breath hitches on your throat, palms starting to sweat. “I always do.”

“Then let’s be together.”

Right away, you turn your body to face him, eyes gazing confusedly at his own, waiting for him to claim his sentence as some kind of joke, but no hesitation builds up from him as he shows complete sincerity (while also hiding the nervousness screaming through his bloodstream) as he waits for you answer.

“Hansol, are you–”

“Hey, that’s subjective, so you have no choice. And it’s not a question for you to turn down.” his lips suddenly perks, raising an eyebrow.

You bite your bottom lip, glancing at your shoes to hide the forming blush at the apples of your cheeks. “Okay.” in a second, you squeezed his hands and get back to resting your head against him.

He chuckles beside you, then plants a soft kiss on the crown of your head, as the two silently walk, hand in hand, with the moonlight and stars shining for your hidden feelings.

You two are a bunch of cowards. 

this had been a normal life for namjoon. being in a gang, getting into shootouts, shit like that. drug running was his main thing, and he was pretty good at it, if you asked anyone who knew him. but that was all he would deliver.

drugs. that’s it .

that is, until his boss had a… special delivery for him to make.

“a fucking kid?” namjoon looked at his boss, only known to him as 'bbang’, with wide eyes as he spoke, his voice raising slightly. “you want me to run… a kid ?!”

“not just any kid, namjoon.” bbang calmly told him, leaning back against the chair he was sitting in. “he's the only son of that big shot ceo, kim something or other. kid was kidnapped by those fucks from one shot.”

“so what does that have to do with me?” namjoon asked with an annoyed expression, honestly wanting to be anywhere but where he was.

“oh, c’mon. you know you're btown’s best runner, whether it be our shit or otherwise. i'd be a dumbass not to have you take the kid.”

“take him where, exactly?”

bbang looked at namjoon with a straight face, his voice coming out smooth and buttery as he spoke to him. “you're taking him back home, to seoul.”

“no. no fucking way.” bbang rolled his eyes as namjoon protested against the situation, leaning back even more into his chair as he let the younger talk. “there's no way i'm going to babysit some kid all the way seoul. you're out of your fucking mind if you really think i would do that”

“not even for the million dollar reward they're giving to whoever brings him back safely?"

bbang gave him a smirk, tilting his head lightly as he watched namjoon's expression change from slightly angry to shocked. "listen, namjoon. if you do this, you won't have to do anything ever again, yeah? a million fucking dollars, man! you do this last thing for me and you can be out of this shit. you don't even have to come back."

namjoon’s eyes were a little wider and his mouth was slightly agape, telling bbang exactly everything he needed and giving him an answer almost immediately. he scoffed and ran a hand through his hair, not even daring to say his answer. why would he need to?

"when do we leave?"

"tonight." bang stood up straight as he talked to namjoon. "it'll take at least three days to get there by foot. and yes, i know you're gonna be walking because you can't drive for shit."

namjoon scoffed again, rolling his eyes as he listened to bbang.

"kid's like ten, so just be careful with him, alright? you'll need him to get home without a single scratch on him if you want this money." namjoon took a deep breath before nodding and turning his back away from the elder and making his way out the door.

"and namjoon,"

"what?"

he turned back around, his jaw clenching when he saw bbang's serious expression and his piercing eyes that stared right into namjoon. "people are gonna be after you for this kid," bbang stood up from his chair, walking closer to namjoon and placing a hand on his shoulder. "so don't do something stupid alright? always stay strapped and keep your guard up. i want you to finish this run alive , am i understood?"

namjoon bit the inside of his cheek and hesitantly nodded at bbang before brushing the elder's hand off of his shoulder and walking out, making his way across the street to his apartment. for a moment he thought of what he was getting himself into, but when he thought of how much money he would be getting from bringing this kid home, the thought was easily pushed to the back of his head and the only thing he thought about was what he would end up doing with the money, how much he would spend for his family, and how much he would keep for himself.

as he walked into his apartment, he checked the clock hanging up on the wall opposite from him. it read 2:14 pm. he had a few hours to get everything he needed and to sleep a bit before heading back to bbang's to get the kid. he started by taking a shower, making a mental checklist of things he would need to get before he left.

'seoul is a pretty long walk... i should bring an extra pair of shoes.'

'i'm gonna need some money for food...'

'water is a must... '

he let the warm water of the shower run down his back as he thought long and hard about what he would need to bring with him, getting out fifteen minutes later and starting to stuff things in his backpack as he dried himself off. in his rucksack were two days worth of clothes, a couple bottles of water, four guns (as bbang would say, 'you can never have too many guns.'), many, many bullets and a wad of cash for if he needed to buy any other necessities.

he checked the bag over three times just to make sure he didn't forget anything before setting it down next to his bed. as he fell over on the mattress, not even bothering to change into another set of clothes and just opting to keep the towel wrapped around his waist and change when he woke up a few hours later, he listened to the sounds that were emitting outside of his open window. the wind blowing, the sound of police sirens that had been a staple in his life for as long as he could remember, the cars zooming down the street, their engines roaring as the drivers stepped on the gas just to prove a point that they were tough guys with good cars. all of the sounds of the street were like a lullaby to namjoon, were like a soft whisper in his ears, and as he covered his eyes with his forearm, they lulled him to sleep.

by the time namjoon woke up, it was 7:15. he lightly groaned as he rubbed his face with both hands, pushing himself off of the mattress and making his way to the closet. he slipped on a dull white t-shirt and a pair of slightly tattered cargo pants, putting a moss green jacket on over his shoulders and a black baseball cap, before grabbing his rucksack and making his way across the street to bbang's garage. he could tell all eyes were on him as soon as he walked into the garage, adjusting his cap and walking right up to bbang , who was standing, leaning against the wall with the same shit eating smirk he had given namjoon just hours earlier.

next to him was a young boy, his face cherubic and his eyes shining with an innocence that namjoon would never know of. he looked a bit scared of the elder as he held onto bbang's shirt sleeve, looking up at namjoon with wide doe eyes. namjoon looked down at him with an unreadable expression before looking back up at bbang, nodding his head over to the boy.

"this the kid?"

"yeah." bbang pushed himself off the wall and took hold of namjoon's rucksack, namjoon handing it over to him as he opened it and checked the contents inside. "clothes, good. money, water, shoes... alright." he looked back up at namjoon with a raised eyebrow. "how many you got."

"four." namjoon lifted up his shirt to reveal two glock 27's in the waistband of his cargo pants and lifted up his pant legs to reveal two more ruger lcp's. he gave bbang a light smirk as he tilted his head slightly. bbang chuckled as he walked up to him, handing him another ruger and wrapping his fingers around the hilt.

"take another." he muttered before looking back up at namjoon. "you can never-"

"have too many guns." namjoon finished the sentence for bbang before carefully placing the gun in his rucksack. he looked back over at the boy, who had been awfully silent, before walking over to him and crouching down to his level. he awkwardly placed his hand on the boy's head and feigned a smile before looking back up at bbang with a raised eyebrow. "anything else i need?"

"hmm..." bbang rubbed his chin in thought, rolling his eyes upward as he marked off his own mental checklist before shaking his head at namjoon. "not anything i can think of. just stay hidden and be careful." namjoon nodded, pulling out the black mask that he had in his pocket and slipping it over the bottom half of his face.

bbang looked over at the boy, patting his shoulder and motioning for him to follow namjoon as he walked out the garage. the boy hesitantly nodded, quietly following namjoon as he walked back into the streets and started his journey to seoul. there was a certain kind of stride in his footsteps as he walked, one foot following the other, one leg swinging past the other in time with his breaths as he let his thoughts roam, only one being coherent in his mind.

this better be worth the money.

it was silent as they walked, the boy most likely too scared to say anything and namjoon too uninterested and uncaring for small talk, but the silence was deafening, and namjoon felt that he had to say something to him. he was a little too quiet to have been an abducted child. maybe he was too scared to say anything, maybe he had always been like that. namjoon didn't know, but he could tell that the boy was deliberately staying silent when he heard a growl of the boy's stomach and took a glance at his distressed face as he clutched onto his abdomen. ' the kid's hungry... ' he thought, stopping in his tracks and looking down at the boy, who had stopped abruptly when he noticed namjoon's stride had slowed and halted.

"let's get something to eat."

namjoon only watched as the boy ate his burger, a bit amused with how fast he was eating. it was as if he hadn't eaten in days or as if that burger from a grimy diner in fucksville. namjoon chuckled to himself before handing the boy a small cup filled to the brim with water. "slow down. drink this before you choke."

the young boy stopped chewing as he looked up at namjoon, setting down the burger and taking the cup, only drinking a small amount to aid him in swallowing the food that was in his mouth, before looking back down at the table. namjoon tilted his head to try and get a better look at the boy, a helpless expression on his face and a quiet sniffle coming from him.

"what's your name?"

the boy hesitated for a moment, contemplating in his mind whether or not he should trust namjoon. he should, shouldn't he? he's the one taking him home, so he should at least tell him his name, right?

"seokjin..."

"okay, seokjin," namjoon leaned in closer to the boy, making sure he could see the warm smile he was trying to give to him "you can call me rm, alright?" seokjin nodded slowly, finally looking up from the table at namjoon. namjoon gave him another, more genuine smile, as he looked at him. "you don't have to be scared of me okay? i'm gonna take you home." seokjin stilled before nodding to the elder, a small, hopeful smile on his face as took another bite of his burger. and namjoon still only watched as seokjin ate, his mouth flattened to only a thin line as he listened to his surroundings.

the diner they had come into wasn't very crowded, actually bordering on empty as only the two sat at a booth and another man (probably older than the diner itself) sat at the bar. there were dishes clanging in the kitchen, the sound of steam coming from frying pans and the dinging of a bell as the next plate of food came onto the serving table with a light clatter. then there was an opening of the door, the tiny bell ringing periodically as two men walked in. namjoon glanced at them for a moment, that moment being all he needed to know that these were just ordinary men. they were from one shot, and he knew exactly what they were looking for.

calmly, namjoon pulled out another mask from his pocket, slowly handing it to seokjin while mouthing to him 'put this on...'

seokjin quickly obliged, putting on the mask and letting his head hang low as namjoon pulled his own mask back up to cover his face. 

he leaned back against the seat of the booth, keeping his head down and making sure his cap covered his eyes as he listened to the two men walk past them. he waited a moment before lifting his head, quickly looking behind him to make sure they weren't looking in his general direction. 

he took his rucksack from beside him, quickly propping it up on his shoulder and tapping on seokjin's hand to get his attention. "c'mon," he whispered, pulling his cap down lower on his head. 

"we have to go, now." 

he stood up, seokjin following him as they both quickly walked out of the diner, namjoon hoping the men didn't become suspicious of them leaving.

'shit.. ' namjoon thought, pulling the mask down and taking off his cap to stressfully run a hand through his blonde hair and sighing to himself, 'i didn't think they'd be coming that fast...'

"rm...?" seokjin's voice was quiet, a hint of a shake in it as he held onto the hem of namjoon's jacket tightly. namjoon looked over at him, noticing the fear that flickered in his eyes. "who were those guys?"

namjoon bit his lip and sucked in a breath of air. "they're... bad guys." he started, placing his cap back on his head beginning to walk a bit faster to find a motel, "really... really bad guys." he pulled out his phone, opening his messages.

namjoon: fuck, man... you didn't tell me they'd be looking for us that fast

he stuffed his phone back in his pocket and grabbed onto seokjin's arm, pulling him along to the first motel he saw. of course, it wasn't the best looking one, but it worked. seokjin stayed quiet as they walked into the lobby, namjoon walking up to the front desk and smiling lightly at the woman before speaking.

"we're gonna need a room. preferably the cheapest one you got." the woman nodded, turning her back to namjoon to pull a key off of its hook and handing it over to him. namjoon thanked her and quickly walking out of the lobby, seokjin following directly behind him.

the motel room was in fairly good shape for its price. one queen sized bed in the middle of it and a couch on the side. namjoon made note to let seokjin sleep on the bed. the walls were stained badly with god knows what and the ceilings were cracked in a plethora of different places. it was shitty, but it would have to do.

seokjin looked around for a moment, his eyes wide as he scanned the whole room.

namjoon chuckled to himself as he walked over to the bed. "not used to this kinda scenery?" he set his rucksack down on the bed with a sigh before closing the curtains on the windows. seokjin slowly shook his head as he trudged over to the bed and sat down, the springs of the mattress creaking under his weight.

"sorry, kid." namjoon looked over at seokjin with a small smile before taking a peek through the window, making sure no one was coming up to their room before turning back around and sitting next to him, taking off his cap and letting his hair fall down to his shoulders. "it's not exactly the four seasons, but it should be good enough for tonight." he gently rested a hand on the boy's knee, tapping the bone lightly before standing back up and walking over to the couch. 

namjoon lifted up his shirt, pulling the two glocks from under his waistband and dropping them onto the cushions, doing the same with the rugers that were tucked under his socks. as he sat down on the couch, he picked up one of the guns, taking out the magazine and checking to see how many bullets it had been filled with (hoping it was full), inspecting the trigger to be sure it wouldn't jam, making sure the silencer was secured. as he methodically inspected the guns, seokjin stared at him with a type of awe that was indescribable before his soft voice came out, barely in a whisper.

"why do you have so many guns?"

namjoon chuckled to himself as he still looked over the pieces, only pausing to move a stray hair out of his face. "it's like the golden rule of gangs. always be strapped." seokjin began to tense up at the utterance of the word 'gang' , twirling his thumbs against each other as he spoke again, his voice being even softer if that were even possible.

"you... you're in a gang? "

namjoon could hear the hint of fear in seokjin's voice; he had completely forgotten that it was a gang that had taken him. he stopped inspecting his guns and set them down, running a hand through his hair as he looked at seokjin. "yeah, i am," he sighed, leaning back a little on the couch as he spoke to seokjin, "but i'm not with the guys who took you. i'm with the good guys in this kind of situation, i promise."

seokjin, still looking down at his feet, slowly nodded as he bit the inside of his cheek. the thoughts he had about trusting namjoon had sprang back up, so many questions running in his mind. what if he was actually a bad person? what if he would hurt him? what if he used his gun on him? those were the kind of thoughts that roamed in seokjin's head, and he began to get scared again. 

but as he looked back up, he noticed how namjoon smiled at him; it was a warm, reassuring smile; a protective smile, and all the thoughts in the boy's head disappeared, a small smile of his own finding its way on his face as he looked back down at his feet, knowing that he was in good hands.

and then there was a banging at the door.

namjoon's head shot up as he looked over the door, his eyebrows furrowing as he stared at the wooden barrier between them and whoever was on the other side. he stayed silent, still as a statue on the couch as he waited.

one second.

two seconds.

three seconds.

then another banging at the door.

namjoon sprang up from the couch, making his way over to seokjin and taking his arm, guiding him to the bathroom and lightly pulling him inside. he motioned for the boy, wide eyed and afraid, to get into the tub, bringing his finger up to his lips in a silent 'shush' as seokjin sat inside. namjoon crouched down, pointing at seokjin as he whispered as soft as humanly possible, "stay here, and don't come out unless i tell you to, okay?" 

seokjin shakily nodded, namjoon nodding back before straightening back up and closing the shower curtain so seokjin was out of sight, turning off the bathroom light before closing the door and walking back over to the couch. 

he grabbed one of his guns, cocking it and resting his finger under the trigger before slowly walking up to the door. he tried to look out the peephole, but it was pitch black, being covered up by what only namjoon could assume was someone's hand.

shit...

he gritted his teeth and stood to the side of the door. he could feel the individual bead of sweat begin to run down his forehead, his breath beginning to grow shaky from anticipation. never had he been in this sort of predicament, people looking for him, coming after him and possibly wanting to kill him; never over the shit he'd usually run. but this? this wasn't his usual shit. this was a person, a kid . he took a deep breath as he looked at the door from the corner of his eyes, his back flush against the wall and the gun in position, pressed to his thigh. "who is it?" he yelled out, quickly wiping away the sweat that had begun to accumulate atop his forehead before going back to position, waiting for a reply.

"its yoongi."

namjoon sighed in relief, quickly opening the door and letting yoongi in, the elder walking inside quickly and closing the door behind him. "fuck man," namjoon took a deep breath as he ran a hand through his hair stressfully, narrowing his eyes at yoongi. "how did you even figure out where i was?" yoongi chuckled as he sat down on the bed, nodding his head over to namjoon's phone.

"your gps is still on, man." he shakes his head as he quietly laughs, leaning back against the headboard of the bed. "and i'm btown's pi. you really thought i wouldn't be able to track you down?" 

namjoon rolled his eyes as he walked over to the bathroom, opening the door and turning on the light. he walked over to the tub, gently pulling the shower curtain back and looking down at seokjin with a smile as he held his hand out to him, pulling him up and out of the tub, back into the room as he walked back over to the couch and sat down, beginning to reinspect his guns. 

yoongi looked over at seokjin with a raised eyebrow. 

"this the kid?" 

namjoon pursed his lips and nodded as his hard stare stayed on the gun in his hand. 

yoongi smiled as he looked at seokjin, "don't worry, bud. you're in good hands." he pointed his thumb in namjoon's direction with a light chuckle, "our boy rm here's always had successful runs. he'll get you home safe and sound." 

namjoon only smirked, shaking his head in amusement as he put down the gun and pulled out his phone, turning off the gps and checking his messages.

bbang: i already told you what you were dealing with. don't fuck this up.

namjoon stuffed his phone back in his pocket, looking up at yoongi as he leaned back on the couch. 

"why are you here again?" 

yoongi scoffed, rolling his eyes as he looked at namjoon with pursed lips, pulling a cord out of his pocket.

"you forgot your charger in the garage, dumbass."

namjoon groaned, getting up and taking the cord from yoongi. "i knew i forgot something. thanks, man." yoongi shook his head as he pushed himself off of the bed.

"don't even mention it, man." he made his way over to the door, his hand on the doorknob as he slowly twisted it, opening the door as he turned his head toward namjoon. "just get the kid home saf-"

yoongi's head flew back as a bang rang through seokjin and namjoon's ears. everything went in slow motion. the blood spurting out of yoongi's head as the bullet went through his skull, staining the walls and the carpet underneath him, his body beginning to fall back to the ground as the realization hit namjoon.

"shit!"

namjoon quickly jumped off of the couch, making his way to close the door but it was too late. pressure was being put on both sides, and namjoon wasn't strong enough, him being pushed back as the door swung open and a tall man with a gun in his hand making his way closer to him.

namjoon reacted quickly, tackling the man and causing him to drop his gun out of his hand. while the man was down, namjoon turned his head to seokjin who was frozen in his spot, his eyes wide as he looked at yoongi's lifeless body, blood pouring from the wound in his head. "seokjin, go in the bathroom!" he yelled out, the boy not budging and everything namjoon was saying to him becoming muffled in his ears.

"seok-"

namjoon was cut of with a swift punch to the jaw, the man overpowering him and towering over his body as he threw more punches. blood was beginning to pour from namjoon's mouth and nose. namjoon tried to put up a fight, but this man was larger, stronger, too much compared to his thin figure. the man stopped punching him for a moment, bringing his face closer to namjoon's as he spit up blood.

"you're rm? pathetic..." the man coldly chuckled as he brought his hands up to namjoon's throat, tightening them around him and causing namjoon to gargle out at the sudden pressure. "to think that you're known as btown's best runner... to think that i'm gonna be the one that kills you and takes the kid back. perfect." 

namjoon tightly took hold of the man's forearm, trying desperately to pull him away with what strength he was holding onto as the man's grip tightened around his neck. 

"think about it..." the man laughed maniacally, a vein beginning to protrude from his forehead. "i'm gonna be a fucking god ... yeah? being the one shot member that kills the notorious rm? the guy that's killed so much of us? so much of his own kind ?" his grip tightened even more as he spoke through gritted teeth. "me, moon jongup... i'm gonna kill you... with my bare hands? this is fucking golden..." he fell silent as he added more pressure onto namjoon's throat.

namjoon's mouth was beginning to foam as more and more air was being restricted from his pipes. he let his head fall back as he rolled his eyes up too look at seokjin, the boy now looking down at him as he was getting strangled. namjoon widened his eyes to get the boy's attention, looking at him for a moment before, slowly, weakly averting his gaze to the guns on the couch cushion. 

seokjin's eyes widened, but he understood what namjoon was trying to tell him, and once namjoon realized that, he looked away, trying his hardest to keep his consciousness and keep the man above him from choking him to death. even the slightest amount of pressure he was taking away being enough to suffice; it was enough to keep the man above him distracted as seokjin slowly inched closer and closer to the couch, picking up one of the guns and cocking it.

he hesitated for a moment, his hands shaking vigorously as he rested his small index finger on the trigger, slowly aiming the gun right at the man's head from where he was standing. seokjin took a shaky breath, his finger beginning to press down and his body recoiling as the buzzing sound of a silenced shot pierced through his ears.

seokjin fell back, the gun falling out of his hands and the wind momentarily being knocked out of him as he fell hard onto the ground. all he could hear was a soft thud against the carpet and the sound of namjoon's coughing and hard heaving. the elder was now on his hands and knees, gasping for air as small drops of blood and tears dripped from his nose and eyes.

"fucking hell..."

namjoon's breaths were wheezy as he weakly pushed himself off of the ground, his whole face and neck red and hand shaped bruises beginning to form from where the man's grip had been on his throat. he wobbled to the bathroom, turning the faucet on the sink and splashing water across his face to wipe away the blood that had been splattered across his face before turning off the water and walking back out.

namjoon crouched over to seokjin, trying to block his view of the two bodies merely feet away from them as he sat the boy up and firmly gripped onto his shoulders.

"are you okay?"

seokjin was trembling, tears starting to stream down his face as he silently stared up at namjoon with wide eyes and small hiccups escaping from his mouth. namjoon pulled the boy into his arms, making sure his face was buried into the dip in his shoulder as he continued to shake and cry and momentarily consoling him before seokjin pulled away, gripping onto namjoon's jacket as he started to cry harder. 

"i... i-i want to go home..."

namjoon pulled the boy back into his embrace, lightly stroking his hair as seokjin began to sob. namjoon knew why he was like this. how couldn't he? seokjin had just killed a man, most definitely something the boy never thought he would have to do in his life. as he holds the crying boy, namjoon remembers the first time he killed someone, how his reaction to seeing someone's demise at his own hands was the same as the young boy he was consoling. only there was no one to comfort him, there was no one to tell him that he was going to be okay, no one to tell him that he wasn't a cold blooded killer.

because in the end that was what he had become for a long time.

namjoon stood up, hoisting up a still crying seokjin and burying the boy's face in his shoulder, making sure the horrible scene was unable to be seen by him. he quickly grabbed his guns, carefully tossing them in his rucksack before throwing it over his shoulder and beginning to hastily walk out of the motel room. he took one final glance over at yoongi, his wide and lifeless eyes showing how unexpected his end was to him, the small hole in the middle of his forehead, and moon jongup, slumped over himself and only recognizable as a bloody pile of nothing, before turning away and not looking back. as he walked, carrying the boy in his arms as they moved down the streets of the city, not knowing what else could happen on their trek to seoul, namjoon thought of bbang's warning

i want you to finish this run alive

it hadn't even been a day. he checked his phone to see that it was only 12 am, a mere five hours since he left the garage with seokjin, and he already had someone after him for the boy.

as he walked, carrying seokjin in his arms as they moved down the streets of the city, namjoon wondered if he'd be able to make it to seoul alive.

eventually, seokjin had fallen asleep against namjoon, his cheeks stained with dried tears. namjoon shifted to carrying the boy on his back, trudging along the street with his face covered by his mask and his head hanging low. 

the sun was beginning to rise; namjoon was beginning to grow tired. he hoped he would be able to find another motel soon to sleep at for a few hours, and eventually he’d have to remember to find something for the both of them to eat. he swayed as he walked, the strands of blonde hair peeking from under his cap and his breathing becoming ragged. 

the weight of seokjin on his back and his rucksack hanging from his shoulder, along with how weak he already was from being strangled nearly to death, took a toll on him. for a moment, he looked up at the few stars that peeked down at him through the clouds, basking in their glow before they were masked by the sunlight that stole away their glow. he found an alleyway, no signs of life showing from the thin, dark path as he walked down it. he gently shook seokjin awake, urging the boy to hop down from his back and leaned back against the brick wall of the alleyway, setting his rucksack beside him and sitting down. he sighed out in exhaustion as his eyes closed, seokjin following suit and resting his head on namjoon’s arm.

namjoon’s neck was warm and it was hard to breathe, a stinging sensation running through his throat as he inhaled and exhaled. he leaned his head against the wall, looking down at the boy through the corners of his eyes.

 seokjin was wide awake now, clutching onto namjoon’s jacket as the realization hit him that he just killed a man not too long ago. the thought and the glimpse of death he had seen before his face being covered with namjoon’s shoulder flashing in and out of his mind, the feeling of the hard recoil the gun had on him once he pulled the trigger, the metallic smell of blood that flooded his nostrils once the act had been carried out, all of it made him shudder, and namjoon had noticed this.

“hey…” namjoon rasped out. his voice was scratchy, deeper than usual as he spoke to seokjin, lightly resting his arm around the boy’s shoulders. “don’t think about it too much. he was…”

“i remembered his face…”

seokjin suddenly blurted out, his grip on namjoon’s jacket tightening as his breathing became shallow and tears started to well in the corners of his eyes. “he…” 

finally, namjoon properly looked down at the boy, an eyebrow raised in confusion before he understood what the boy was trying to tell him. 

seokjin took another shaky breath as the tears that had been accumulating in his eyes began to fall again before looking up at namjoon. he looked hopeless, broken as he stared at the elder with wide eyes, the innocence slowly being sucked away from them. “he was a bad person, right? he killed your friend…”

namjoon hesitated for a moment before nodding at seokjin. “yeah. he was a bad guy.” he rubbed small circles into the boy’s arm, pulling him a little bit closer to him. “you did the right thing, okay? you’re not a bad person.” 

seokjin slowly nodded, biting the inside of his cheek as another question involuntarily fell from his tongue.

“rm… are you a bad person?”

seokjin barely whispered out the question that had been gnawing at the back of his mind ever since they started their journey, looking back down at his thighs and shrinking into himself a bit more. namjoon dryly chuckled, a small smile on his face as he thought about it.

“shit… probably. i mean, i’m really no different from the other guys, if you think about it.”

“but you’re taking me home, aren’t you?”

“yeah, but…” namjoon’s voice faded, the thought of all the things he had to do over the years of being in btown, the thing he didn’t exactly want to do, but had  to if he wanted to stay alive. the amount of people he killed, the amount of trust he had to break to get where he was now, all the lies he had to tell to get what he needed, every vile deed he had to do just to be seen as worthy. he thought about that as he looked down at the young boy rested against his arm, seeing a bit of himself when he was younger in him, the innocence namjoon wished he could get back, but knew would never happen . 

“i’ve been in this gang since i was fourteen… i’ve done a lot of bad things, things i’m not really proud of, things i shouldn’t have done but still did... ” he looked down at his rucksack, knowing that there were five guns inside, guns that reminded him that he would be nothing but a criminal, a bad person. no better than the gum stuck to someone’s shoe, the scum that stuck to dumpsters. 

“i’m taking you home, but that doesn’t outweigh all the bad things i’ve done. i’m nineteen now, that’s five years of bad things… nah, this one good thing won’t make up for all that.” seokjin pursed his lips, looking back up at namjoon with a ghost of a smile.

“i think you’re good…”

namjoon looked at the boy in shock for a fraction of a second before a light smile of his own found its way on his lips. “yeah? you think so?”  

seokjin nodded as he looked back down, leaning back against namjoon. namjoon chuckled to himself lightly, taking off his cap and running a hand through his hair as he leaned further back against the brick wall and closing his eyes, seokjin doing the same as they both slowly fell asleep, the sun rising and a new day beginning to pass for the two.

one step closer to seoul.

When you encountered Kim Mingyu the first time, namely in a small cafe just two blocks away from Subway, he didn’t necessarily catch your attention the moment he stepped into the coffee shop. Meeting him was the aftermath of yet another blind date set up by your friends who thought they’d do you a favor. Not that Mingyu wasn’t attractive – quite the contrary, he was one of the more good-looking fellas you’ve seen around, but he just looked so neat and shy and plain in that black turtleneck, same colored slacks and beige coat buttoned up all the way. At this point, you’d rather escape to Subway and go through the hassle of ordering a sandwich. Nonetheless, you refrained from doing so.

What was originally supposed to be a date over a cup of coffee turned out to be a full-hearted conversation based on mutual feelings on particularly peculiar topics over the span of two cups of coffee and five batches of chocolate chip cookies. At first, his true colors were veiled behind the natural awkwardness he possessed and unusual jokes that took you a good minute to comprehend. His gaze wandered everywhere except at you yet whenever you talked and your gaze drifted outside to stare at the pedestrians and occasional vehicles passing by, you could sense his eyes on you, the brightest star right then.

But once you tore down bits and pieces of the walls he had built around him, you caught a glimpse of the klutz that defined Kim Mingyu, the tongue-tied man he was whenever he was nervous or had too many thoughts occupying his mind simultaneously, the suddenly much more likable guy for adding cereal after milk. You noticed how pretty his eyes were, how much depth and innocence his gaze held and detected the slight lisp he held. It was the little things that made him stood out from your past romances and flings. Then again, you always paid attention to details in every person and that had been your mindset with everyone before him.

Theoretically speaking, he shouldn’t have intrigued you as much as he managed to. In the end, what he revealed of himself wasn't something you hadn't heard before. Being a great cook might have been impressive for some others, but with the handful of people you met, it was no longer mesmerizing. You heard all of his stories too many times as if the same record was playing over and over again but each time in different stereos.

There were many reasons that spoke for why Kim Mingyu was nothing more than a fling if you took the chance and way too little arguments why Mingyu would be right this time. But when you met him in the supermarket for the third time out of the three times you went grocery shopping after that not-so horrible tragedy of a date, you started to question your rationality.

Though still as plain when it came to his choice of clothing, Mingyu was definitely bolder than on your initial meeting. He was the one who dared the first step and stirred up the conversation, the one who would ask how you were doing, the one who pitched into the same direction on the way home but took a left turn at the second crossroad. His stories remained as common as ever, nothing that wowed you, yet behind his words lied the charm laced in his voice that pulled you in. At one point, he built up enough courage to invite you over to dinner and as much as your reason desperately tried to pry him off, you said yes.

You didn’t regret your choice.

Besides finding out that Mingyu did live up to his self-proclaimed title as an amateur chef, he finally showed his true colors, ranging from the warmest hue to his darkest sides he was unwilling to unravel right away. Neither of you was intoxicated by an alcohol rush – hell, all he had was apple juice, all sorts of coke and water – but if anyone were to barge in and interrupt your two-man fiesta, they would’ve staked out the entire apartment looking for some nonexistent stash. What started out as a small conversation about minuscule life updates while enjoying pasta evolved into questions about different types of potatoes as you got tipsy on water and hiccuped on vanilla and cherry coke mixed together.

That was also when you took notice of his slight lisp, his habit of tangling his fingers in his jet-black hair after a good laugh, his lips pressed together as he tried to suppress his grin. In a matter of hours, there was no longer any trace of the diplomatic Mingyu who cracked some awful puns when he was feeling humorous. Instead, a carefree and significantly more resolute Mingyu who didn’t shy away from pulling you onto the couch and spilling a bit of cola along the way took his place.

Reminiscing about past memories, slurring about precedents and laughing about disastrous ways to end a date in the hospital made the evening worthwhile. Topics that you never even thought of were brought to light and made you realize that there was something more in the vessel that belonged to Kim Mingyu. All the while as his slender fingers softly tugged on the roots of your hair and as he looked at you with so much affection it proved his soberness, he didn’t dare to delve into deeper territory. In the back of your mind, you were fairly sure the evening was going to escalate to you staying the night and waking up under the sheets in his embrace the next morning. Though once you saw his reluctance and restraint to bruise your lips (more or less), you were proved wrong.

Appreciating his self-control and the boundaries he didn’t want to cross at this early stage, maybe your rationality had been wrong about him the entire time. You enjoyed the pace he was opting for, acknowledged his effort and was utterly affected by his entirety. Throughout the night your lips never touched once, but his touches still ghosted on your skin even when he was no longer near. Slowly but surely, he became the center of your world and so did you become his. That was how you began to love him, little by little.

It was a long process to get where you were now, but the long journey made the result so much sweeter. Innocent touches and intertwining fingers in public was how you started off before Mingyu finally pulled himself together and pressed featherlight kisses on the top of your hair and cheek. The memory of your very first proper kiss in the middle of the night while watching reruns of Spongebob was initiated by you – a quick peck on his lips before he no longer cared if he looked like a tomato and pulled you into a second, deeper one. Out of your fairly long list of past lovers, nobody had managed to strike you as hard as Mingyu. Of course, he was aware of your previous relationships but that had never caused him to look at you in a different light. If not, it urged him to cherish you even more. Even though he wasn’t your first in anything, he made it feel as if he was your first.

Everything was perfectly fine. You were perfectly fine and the only trouble was the whirlwind of emotions that overcame you every hour of the day caused by him, but you wouldn’t want to have it any other way.

Kim Mingyu held your heart in his hands and you wouldn’t want to have it any other way.

You had reached the level where you confined your trust in him, where you sought comfort in him and where you saw home in him. There were no secrets kept hidden from one another and throughout the months of being together, not even a single catastrophic fight had taken place. A few playful bickerings here and there had happened but there had never been a gigantic tear in your relationship that blew it out of proportion. You knew the huge storm would come up sooner or later but you didn’t expect it to destroy everything.

The thunder resounded at a party and truth be told, you should’ve seen it coming. Though the jealousy was running thick, you chose not to intervene just yet despite your fathomable desire to give him a piece of your mind. You still didn’t say a word when you saw him feverishly kissing someone who wasn’t you as if his life depended on it. Knowing Mingyu for so long, you knew he couldn’t hold his liquor well and had impulsive tendencies when he was intoxicated by the burning rush.

But when he pulled back and gave you a perfect sight on his dark eyes which weren’t clouded by anything, but crystal clear with nothing but soberness and intense warmth reflected in them, that was when the lightning struck. You knew that gaze too well, the look he sent you every time because he was so infatuated with you and had no filter to hide any of his affection. But what differed the affection he displayed at that moment than like he usually did was that those feelings weren’t directed towards you.

The second major difference you noticed was that the unconditional adoration radiating from him was more real than the love he had ever shown you – if what he gave you had been real in the first place.

You didn’t need anyone to tell you whether what they shared was a fling or actual love that was blooming unbeknownst to you while Mingyu was supposed to be exclusively yours. Of course, it was the latter. You might’ve been oblivious to it before, how his love for you slowly died out and how hard he struggled to make it work (as pointed out by your friends once when they noticed his torn gaze lingering on you for a second too long or his posture suddenly tense for an unfathomable reason), but the only fact that mattered was that he didn’t choose to stay.

Just like that, your entire world crumbled down until only remnants of what used to be remained.

You couldn’t bring it over yourself to not feel anything for him. Mingyu left a scar too deep in you and nothing could ever stop you from being emotionally invested in him. But you also couldn’t welp in eternal sorrow and infinite lovesickness or hope that he’d come back with clean hands. It was clear that nothing could equal to your relationship before. Mingyu would never let that happen and neither would you.

If you couldn’t diminish your feelings for him, you had to change them.

Yuta probably planned this with the help of Haechan and some other Dreamies.

Yuta asked everyone to a movie in the group chat, but then quickly texted to a group chat that was everyone but you and Taeyong, and was like “Everyone say yes, but then don’t show up on the night of the movie and come up with some excuse as to why”.

Then boom you and Taeyong end up on a date together.

As you and him waited at the theater for the other like seventeen and all of them just happened to message you saying they couldn’t come for some reason or the other.

You and Taeyong were the only two there and were like well we came all this way, we might as well go ahead and watch.

It’s lowkey a date.

You two have a lot of fun, watching a movie together, then going to a cafe after, and finally Taeyong walking you home. 

The next day you start talking about how you two should do it again, since you really enjoyed yourself. 

Three or four dates later, you finally actually labeled it as a date.

Yuta probably bragged to Taeyong he has him to thank, since it was Yuta’s plan to have no one else show up at the movie. 

Taeyong would be mad for a good hour then realize had Yuta and Haechan not done that, he wouldn’t have asked you out.

You would have gone out on five or six dates before Taeyong would finally kiss you, yet, you sorta consider those first three like hangouts not really dates.

He’d be super respectful, like he wouldn’t kiss you first.

You’d probably catch him staring at your lips, he wanting to kiss you, but not doing it.

Then you’d kiss him and then he’d respond by kissing you again right after.

You’d probably end up sorta making out on the doorstep of NCT’s dorm, since you had planned to hang out with the others after your date since they weren’t promoting or anything, and you end up having a good 10 or 11 boys watching you from an upper room’s window and probably disrupting your kiss since one will try to call the others but speak a bit too loud and you’ll hear.

When you two enter the dorms, the other guys will probably pick on you both a lot.

But really they’ll pick on Taeyong a lot more.

Taeyong probably threatens to ground someone at least once.

At least one person ends up getting their phone taken by him, probably a Dreamie or Yuta.

Yuta probably jokes that you two shouldn’t sit next to each other since what happened outside might happen again.

You two become like official after the seventh or eighth date. 

All the thoughts Taeyong had about dating ruining your friendship and stuff, was wrong.

He probably doesn’t bring you to the dorm that often, just because he’d rather the guys know the bare minimum about you.

The first part of your relationship is gonna be awkward.

Like no way around it, no matter how close you to are, still gonna be awkward.

You’ll be dating a good five or six months before that awkwardness starts to fade.

Taeyong is honestly gonna be the best boyfriend.

Like best one ever, lets be real.

He will need constant validation through the relationship, just reassure him that you love him and it’ll be fine.

He gives you a lot of back hugs.

But he’s on the receiving end of more back hugs.

He loves holding you in his arms.

But he also loves it when you wrap your arms around him and hold him.

You’ll just be laying on the sofa and suddenly you have a person’s head laying in your lap, and it’s Taeyong.

He’ll love it if you run your hand through his hair.

Like you playing with his hair, he considers that a quality bonding activity.

He’d probably fall asleep while you did it and you could do something like put his hair into little ponytails and he wouldn’t care one bit.

He’d also love playing with your hair if you laid in his lap.

He’d try to braid but probably just tangle your hair, and then say his sister never taught him how to braid and so you shouldn’t have expected him to be able to know how.

But if you wanted him to braid your hair, he’d probably learn for you.

If you need anyone to straighten the back of your hair, he can do that.

If you need someone to curl the back of your hair, he can’t do that, he’d probably burn himself so don’t ask him. 

He’d also brush your hair if you asked him.

He’d probably be like “Um why.” really confused, but then five seconds later he’d probably be like this is why, realizing how soothing it is just playing with your hair.

He’s the type to murmur “I love you” between kisses.

The best kisser, but he doesn’t realize it.

He probably thinks that someone else would be a better boyfriend than him, but you are just like stop, no, you are the best.

He’ll get hella embarrassed when you tell him that, and he’ll just bury his face in your neck.

When he buries his face in your neck, usually he’ll start kissing it.

He’ll accidentally cover your neck in hickeys, then get really embarrassed that he just did that.

He would apologize to you and you are just like, “We are dating, you don’t need to apologize.”

But he’ll still apologize for every hickey he gives you, until you are just like fine, start putting them in places others can’t see. 

He’ll get embarrassed at that, probably turn a shade of red you’ve never seen on human skin before.

If you give him any hickeys, he’ll probably be like stop for a quick moment, then five seconds later he’s given in and moaning as you suck on his neck.

He lowkey loves marking you, but only where others can’t see, but this wouldn’t happen until you’ve been together a while. 

Like you’re dating two years before he finally gets comfortable with marking you, and you’ll be getting hickeys all over your torso and chest. 

Gets to this point you gotta be like “Taeyong, stop.” 

He won’t admit it, but he highkey gets this surge of manly pride while brushing his fingers over the purple marks.

He might not want the rest of NCT to know much about your relationship, but he wants all people to know you are taken.

He goes into protect mode if anyone flirts with you, like you are his, no one should be flirting with you.

His kisses are the best, like wow you can tell he’s a rapper.

You probably joke about rappers are the best with their tongues at least once, and Taeyong turns a shade of red you’ve never seen. 

He will tell you “I love you” at least 4 times a day.

He says if you don’t get 4 daily reminders he has failed as a boyfriend.

But you are really like no you haven’t, but he still thinks he has.

If he knows he is gonna be busy, he will literally text you all 4 times before work.

If he is touring or in another country, he will make you send him daily selfies.

Like he’ll claim that not seeing your face every day will kill him.

He probably has a snapchat that he made just for the days he can’t be around you.

He loves cuddling you.

He goes between being the big spoon and little spoon depending on his mood.

If he’s being clingy af then prepare for him to be the big spoon.

But if he’s been having a rough day or is sick, prepare for him to be the little spoon.

If you get sick, Taeyong is up in there with all his home remedies trying to make you better.

If he’s sick, he’s saying for you not to bother since he can care for himself.

But he lowkey wants you to take care of him.

He lowkey loves it when you take care of him, despite him saying you don’t need to.

Like let him lay on your chest or lap and run your fingers through his hair and he’ll be out in minutes.

Softly sing to him, even if you can’t sing, and he’ll praise you to the heavens.

He’s all about that praise also.

If you praise him he’ll get all blushy and then want to be better.

He’ll constantly praise you too.

Like you looking good, get ready for him the praise how nice you look in that outfit.

You did your makeup real nice, get ready for him to praise you.

You cook dinner, get ready for that praise of how good a cook you are.

You do anything, get ready for some praise more than likely.

He lowkey loves it when you praise his dancing.

Like quickest way to make him happy or boost his ego, compliment his dancing.

Like even if his favorite artist tells him his dancing is good, if you say his dancing is good, your compliment is worth more to him.

He goes to you for your approval for everything.

Like he’s written a new song or rap, he’s asking you for your opinion.

He cooked something, he’s asking your opinion.

You are honestly his little helper in the kitchen.

He’ll cook whatever you ask him to.

Being his helper, just pretty much means you sit on the counter and taste test everything since he doesn’t let you actually cook or anything.

Probably says his princess doesn’t need to worry herself about cutting and cooking since he can do that all.

You just taste test everything and occasional give him kisses, since he claims your kisses give him energy to finish cooking dinner.

You probably end up completely making out in the kitchen once and dinner burns.

Probably more than once, like tbh.

But Taeyong always treats you to take out when that happens, since he doesn’t want his princess to have to wait another two hours for him to completely restart dinner.

He loves taking photos of you.

Has a whole folder of candids of you.

If you ask him to take photos of you, he’s turned into a photographer and is probably complimenting you for an hour straight. 

Probably has 23 heart emojis by your name in his phone.

Calls you babe or princess instead of your name.

More than likely princess because you are a princess to him.

But he gets flustered if you call him babe.

They exposed him as having the worst alcohol tolerance, so give this boy a little alcohol and he’s wasted.

He probably gets wasted after drinking a bottle of soju and goes online and buys you a ton of stuff.

He probably buys something like a bdsm choker and doesn’t realize it until it comes in but he’s already given you the box and you’ve found it.

You’d probably just be like “Wow didn’t know you were into this.” 

He’d go in defense mode so fast explaining he was drunk, and you just laugh since you know he was because the date on the packing slip was that night he got wasted from one bottle of soju.

You’d probably make a joke about how much of a lightweight he is before assuring him it’s fine, and he should stop worrying since this wasn’t gonna make you break up with him or anything.

He also probably orders you some fancy dress you don’t need, but drunk him thought you’d look good in it, and sober him agrees because you look so hella good in it.

The dress leads to an impromptu photoshoot and he’s forgotten all about that other thing he accidentally bought. 

If you invite him over and your room or apartment or something is messy, he’ll clean it.

Like compulsively he’ll clean everything.

When he’s stressed he’ll probably just come over and like clean your kitchen or something.

You never have to worry about cleaning since he’ll do it.

You try to help sometimes but he’s just like “No, no, no, baby, just sit there and watch, I’ll do this all.” 

He lowkey won’t let you help since he things you’ll mess up something.

Like he probably worries you’ll use like vinegar on the marble countertops, which is something you shouldn’t do, so he’s just like “No no baby you don’t need to help.”

He sucks at keeping secrets, like nothing is a surprise with him.

The only way he can keep secrets from you, is if he doesn’t know it himself.

He also spoils all the surprises.

He probably also spoils comebacks to you, but you promise to not tell, so he doesn’t freak out about it that much now.

You know their comeback song and dance, because Taeyong sucks at secrets.

He’ll love sleeping with you in his arms.

The only way he’ll sleep is holding you or a pillow.

Like if you gotta go something, you gotta put a pillow or something in his arms of he’ll wake up because his arms are not holding you.

He’ll probably softly sing to you when you both try to go to sleep, because he knows his voice soothes you.

 Everyone in the palace had noted Jimin’s childlike curiosity by now and what had been a source of amusement at first had since mellowed into fondness for the sweet and shy man. Apart from the belligerent Yugyeom, who seemed to intensely dislike Jimin for reasons he couldn’t fathom, everyone else had developed a sweet affection for the mute newcomer.

 Over the course of the last few weeks, Jimin had developed a friendship with the Doctor, who encouraged Jimin to continue to be inquisitive and ask questions in his silent way. As a doctor, he often lamented; he was filled with a need to learn constantly while being unfortunately surrounded by people who had no need or desire to learn.

 Which was why he found Jimin to be so pleasingly refreshing and he relished teaching him about this world, despite finding his lack of knowledge on some of the most basic things strange.

 It had been two weeks ago that Jackson had brought both Jimin and the Princess to the closest village, located at the foot of the cliffs and only metres away from the shore. Jimin had never noticed it before as it was on the other side of the castle, far away from the path that he took to the sand. There was no beach here, just sandy grass that grew wild and freely before the ocean took over.

 The villagers had fascinated Jimin in a multitude of ways, but he had left the first time with his stomach roiling with emotions. They had been eager to please the Princess, curtseying and bowing repeatedly while offering her their wares for her to try. She had been inundated with fresh bread, cakes and fine wine, refusing some while allowing Joy and the guards to carry others.

 It had confused Jimin though, as these people were evidently not well off. Their dwellings were cramped, tiny buildings made of wood. Many of them were rotting away slowly from the salt the wind blew over from the ocean resulting in great big holes in walls that were covered with giant sheets of tatty fabric in a vain attempt to try and keep the cold out.

 The villagers themselves wore drab clothing, in shades of brown, grey and black. It only made the royal entourage, with the Princess, in her sky blue gown, and him, in all white; stand out even more clearly against everyone else. While her gown was made of fabric that looked like it had been spun from a dream, dancing at the slightest movement of air, their clothing was heavy and coarse, made for functionality and little else.

 They were also obviously hungrier than anyone he had ever seen before, firm muscles on both the men and the women from all their hard work but their frames thin. It had taken him a while to figure out what had made him so uneasy until he had realised he was witnessing poverty on a level the merfolk could never understand.

 Jimin wouldn’t kid himself; there were plenty of poor merfolk in Thalassa but the ocean ensured that no one remained hungry for very long. It was only those who had dependents that struggled, finding themselves unable to leave in order to hunt down food.

 But the Kingdom provided when asked, with the King and Queen trying their hardest to ensure that everyone was able to cope. There were those in the Trench who suffered, but as he had seen himself, there were many there who would refuse the help of the Kingdom if offered. Even there however, he had never seen poverty on such a wide scale.

 He had watched with horror as they desperately tried to curry favour with the Princess, hoping to ingratiate themselves and perhaps help their lives in some way. Giving away food that would feed the hungry children who had followed them with shy giggles.

 Jimin had been unable to help himself and as they were leaving, he had crouched down in front of a small gaggle of children, unwilling to go just yet. He couldn’t possibly hope to age them, they simple looked like tiny humans to him, not in their fully developed stage, but they had radiated innocence and charisma.

 Their tiny smiles as he’d paid attention to them had charmed him completely and none of them seemed to mind that he didn’t speak. He’d pointed to various things around the village with a quizzical look and it had taken them a few attempts before they understood that he wanted them to teach him.

 The Princess had laughed softly, her voice gentle and bright, like the wind chimes that his maid had placed in his window. She had crouched down next to him, ignoring the protestations of their entourage and the fact her dress was picking up dirt and dust and began to clean clothes alongside him, despite the fact he had no idea what he was doing.

 He had watched her with a soft smile as she regaled the children with stories of adventures that she’d heard in passing from her guards, her tone rising and falling as the occasion called for it before she began to make gestures, emphasising certain moments such as a monster attacking.

 The children had squealed and laughed along with her, as did he. His silent laughter had caught her attention and she had smiled shyly, cheeks flushing a gentle pink in embarrassment. She’d make a lovely Queen, he’d decided at that moment, watching as she entertained the youngest and some of the poorest of the people in her kingdom.

 When the guards finally convinced the Princess that it was time to leave, he’d watched as she’d embraced some of the villagers around her, giving them soft words of encouragement. With the setting sun illuminating her as it slowly dipped beneath the waves, he’d been in awe of her extraordinary beauty. Her kind heart had only made his stutter.

 Jackson had encouraged Jimin to leave as well, pressing a firm hand against his shoulder blades and trying to ensure they caught up with the larger group. He’d been unwilling however, distressed at leaving innocent children so hungry and after slipping past Jackson’s arm, which had caused the man to shout out in annoyance, he’d hurried back to the young humans and filled their hands with all the gold he’d had in his pockets.

 He’d been given it at the castle, told that he could use it to buy wares if he’d wanted. But he didn’t want to buy anything; he simply wanted to ensure that these small humans and their poor families were able to eat.

 Tiny, dirty hands had curled around the coins with hesitance, their glassy eyes wide as they’d looked up at him in confusion. He’d smiled encouragingly, nodding his head to try and get them to accept his gift despite them trying to hand it back.

 Jimin had mimed eating food before pointing at the coins then back to them. They’d stared for a moment longer before returning to their parents, puzzlement evident in their eyes. But their parents knew, and they’d watched the handsome young man who hadn’t spoken a word yet shown more kindness in his gestures than they’d ever witnessed. Not a word was spoken amongst them all as they’d bowed to him graciously, some of them with tears flowing at the prospect of being able to afford good food for their families.

 He’d simply smiled and bowed back before re-joining Jackson, entirely unaware of the fact that his entire group had watched his selfless actions with shock. The Princess had simply watched with a kind smile on her face as he’d willingly given away a veritable fortune to poor villagers, something no one in the castle would ever consider.

 On the way back, she’d quietly told him how much she’d admired him at that moment, how she’d always wanted to provide for them but had been scolded by her parents at the idea of simply giving away royal money. He’d frowned at that, and struggled to figure out how to ask her why they didn’t want to help those in their kingdom.

 The Princess had sighed sadly and gestured to the village behind them. “To many of those with money, that village is simply a way to make more money. It doesn’t matter to them that they are poor or starving, as long as they give money. So the idea of giving money to villagers who are poor is a foreign concept. There’s a mentality of ‘if they didn’t want to be poor then they shouldn’t be born poor’, but it’s not their fault.”

 Jimin had remained quiet, scowling at the rough pathway as they walked along and fury bubbled in his veins. As if she could tell, she’d taken a quick look around to ensure that no one was paying attention to their conversation before patting his bicep reassuringly.

 “It’s okay, I get angry over it too. I try to go often to let them know that I’m aware of them, perhaps you’d like to accompany me on my visits? I go weekly so, maybe we can encourage the kitchen to make food to make or something? I think they would most definitely appreciate seeing you again after their reactions today.” Her smile was as bright as the sun and as pretty an angelfish as she’d stared at him.

 He had found himself nodding along with her, giving her a shy grin in return before ducking his head from her. As a result of that, they’d visited the village twice more with a cart full of surplus food from the kitchens and pantry. The kitchen staff had been confused as to why they wanted so much food, but had fulfilled the request given the Princess had been the one to ask.

 It had infuriated certain members of the court, Yugyeom had been one of the loudest to whine, but the Princess had held firm, demanding that she be allowed the food because as a member of the royal family, it was her food too. Her parents had eventually relented, accepting that food was a lot cheaper than just handing over money like Jimin had.

 Jimin had intensely enjoyed the happiness and excitement of the villagers as they’d been handed food, some of them already excitedly discussing the recipes that they wanted to try with the fresh food. The children had acted like young merchildren when given fresh coral, almost bouncing off the walls with excitement.

 He had been surprised on their last visit to be invited to remain in the village for a while, with the promise of a village wide feast in honour of their mute benefactor and the Princess. The idea had reminded him of in Thalassa, when the kingdom would celebrate various occasions with parties that spread throughout the kingdom, everyone sharing food together and celebrating throughout the day and night.

 To his intense surprise, the Princess had agreed immediately, despite the protestations of Joy and the guards, which had only caused Jimin to smile and nod as well. They had watched the sun set over the horizon as the villagers set fires burning to cook the food, the ocean embracing it once more as the sky was streaked with pinks, oranges and reds as if a human artist had flung his paint soaked brush across the sky.

 Once the food had been cooked and laid out, he had feasted on succulent chicken that had been seasoned with spices and seasonings that the villagers grew in their tiny gardens. The skin had been crisp but the flesh soft and juicy, bursting with flavour and falling apart in his mouth, causing silent groans to fall from him.

 It had only been matched with the butter soaked, roasted vegetables that had melted in his mouth with every bite, orange carrots and yellow parsnips competing for his attention with potatoes that fell apart on his fork.

 To top everything off had been the cheese infused bread, offered to him by a young girl who had blushed the deepest red at his smile. The crust thick and covered in cheese that had baked hard before cracking open to reveal the softest, fluffiest white insides that hid a gooey mess of cheese.

 It had been one of the best meals of his life, topped with rich and flavoursome mead that slid down his throat easily. That had been the first night Jimin had ever gotten drunk, and the guards had had to practically carry him back to his room once the festivities had ended, something the Princess had teased him about the next morning when it had felt like his head was being chewed on by a Great White.

 At the time however, it had been pleasant, his senses dulled just enough for a moment to appreciate the merriment of the villagers that overflowed and caused the area to feel electric with excitement. As the night continued on, someone produced what he discovered was a fiddle from their home and another created make shift drums.

 Fast music began to play, the notes pleasing to his ears and causing his body to sway automatically. The villagers themselves had begun to dance in the light of the fires that burned brightly in the darkness.

 Given his inebriated state, it had taken relatively little persuasion from some of the ladies to get him to dance. The Princess had sat, laughing with Joy as they both watched him move towards the dancing people. No doubt they had expected him to flail wildly or something given his unfamiliarity with almost anything, but he had shocked everyone there.

 Instead he had moved like water, his body grace personified as he moved from one area to another. Dancing on land was not like dancing in the sea, and he felt a little awkward with his legs but he found that his core was still strong from his life spent swimming with a tail.

 It had taken little effort to spin and turn effortlessly, his body feeling as if it wasn’t even part of himself anymore. The villagers had cheered him on, clapping a rhythm before the fiddler and drummer began to join in, providing him with a beat that his body moved to without conscious effort.

 As he had danced in the crowd, his eyes closed as his senses went haywire with the alcohol and entirely unaware of the impressed gaze of the Princess, he had felt free and happy for the first time on land.

  After their experience in the village the first time, Jackson had decided that he wanted to bring Jimin to a fellow doctor friend in another town. After getting confirmation that a visit would be welcomed, he had informed Jimin that it was only a three days carriage ride away, nestled in the foot of what he called mountains. Apparently his friend had more experience with mute people, the mountains being filled with people who shunned social contact.

 Jimin had been excited to join the doctor, the prospect of experiencing the land and perhaps understanding more about the world overtaking any pangs he’d had for the ocean. He knew that the doctor would be unable to help him, but the lure of exploration caused him to agree anyway, even if it meant having to leave the Princess for a few days.

 He felt that they had developed a much closer friendship, spending time together frequently. Due to his silence, she often ended up talking about many problems she was having, desperate to fill the quiet moments between them and so he found himself quite knowledgeable about her.

 His enthusiasm for the trip had been appreciated though and Jackson had helped Jimin to pack enough belongings to last the entirety of the trip. It had been two weeks since the village feast and the day had finally arrived to go to the mountains.

 Jimin forced himself to pull away from the window, acknowledging as he did so that this would be the last time he’d see the ocean in a while. Tugging the light green coat he had been given onto his shoulders, he ignored the pang in his stomach as he exited the room. It was just nerves at going to a foreign place, he told himself.

 He had been informed that they would have to take a carriage to the faraway town, given the fact that Jimin had no idea how to ride a horse. When queried about his riding ability, he’d simply laughed and wondered what they’d think if he could tell them that he’d never even seen a horse until a few months ago, never mind ride it.

 The courtyard was busy with activity as usual; something that Jimin had come to understand would never change. It was the hub of activity for the castle, with workers using the good weather to make sure that repairs were done or soldiers ensuring that important training was completed. The lifeblood of the castle spent their time in these walls and he’d discovered that by watching he could get a good understanding of those who kept the castle running.

 A large carriage was sat waiting in the centre, two large horses attached to it, one a golden colour that reminded him of the sun while the other was a deep black, its fur highlighted brown under the morning sun. As he watched them, they nodded their heads lazily and lifted those powerful legs up before pawing at the ground.

 He took a moment to admire them, their strong legs that gave them incredible speed for a land creature and also allowed them to pull far more than they should be able to. Jimin found them to be beautiful creatures, however at the same time he gave them wary respect.

 He’d been kicked two weeks ago when he’d tried to pat one, and he’d discovered that they packed as much force as one of Jungkook’s punches. If he had to estimate, he would say horses probably had as much strength as the average merfolk given how much they could pull, which had also made him realise how weak he was compared to before.

 “Come on John, we need to get going now if we want to make good time before nightfall.” Jackson called out, climbing into the carriage at the sight of the slender young man. Pulled away from his thoughts, Jimin hurried after his friend and climbed into the dark interior.

 Inside, he looked around the cramped area with unease that built slowly in his stomach. He’d come to discover on land that he didn’t like enclosed spaces and he wondered how humans could cope with being trapped like this.

 He wasn’t particularly surprised this though, in fact he might even find it strange if he’d been okay considering he’d gone from the wide open depths of the ocean to the cramped living of the land. Despite his unhappiness at being inside a small, dark space, he gave a tremulous smile to Jackson when asked if he was okay.

 “You’ll love Geniia John, the mountain range there is extraordinary. You can’t even see the tops, there’s just snow and then they vanish into the clouds. It’s the highest mountain range on the continent and the air is so clear and pure. I’d say I’d take you up to the top of one of them but I’m not one for climbing mountains and honestly, I don’t think you’d be able to.” Jimin scowls at that, lifting his chin in a belligerent motion that causes Jackson to laugh.

 “I’m not being mean, mountain climbing is incredibly hard and life threatening. People die frequently. There’s something called snow at the top, I’m going to assume you’ve never seen it before. It’s frozen water that falls from the sky and because the mountains are so high, the tops are often covered in snow.

 “But if you’re too loud, then you can cause the snow to dislodge which causes an avalanche, which is a huge amount of snow that falls down the mountain. It can kill you, and never mind the altitude sickness, the severe cold or the potential of falling or being crushed by rocks.” Jackson finishes nonchalantly, his hand moving around in casual gestures.

 Sitting with his mouth wide open, Jimin simply stares at him and imagines this horrific place. How can he talk so pleasantly about what sounds like a veritable death trap? Why were they even going there? What was wrong with humans?

 Spying his quiet friends stricken face, Jackson laughs out loud and slaps his thigh in amusement. “It’s alright John, Geniia is at the very bottom of the mountains. Nothing ever happens there, we’ll be fine.”

 Shuddering slightly, Jimin looks out the window of the carriage and watches as they continue down a path away from the castle. Ahead of them, he can see the path stretching out far, through fields of what he’d learned was called wheat, before in the distance it winds through a forest of tall, dense trees.

 Looking behind, he spies the castle as it slowly gets smaller, it’s gigantic size still causing it to dominate the skyline as the sun reflects off the white stone almost blindingly. But his eyes catch on the sight of the sliver of blue that can just be seen over the edge of the fields, slowly disappearing as they move along.

 He watches intently as the sea vanishes finally and suddenly he can’t breathe. Lifting off the seat, he kneels up and cranes his neck, trying valiantly and pointlessly to see the blue again but it’s gone and his chest feels like it’s caving in. His lungs can’t get enough air and his hands begin to shake forcefully before his fingers are clenching the seat.

 “John? John are you okay?” Jackson’s voice is urgent but it feels like Jimin is trying to listen to him through water, like whenever he took a bath and he couldn’t hear the maid as she cursed at him for spending too long in the water.

 He can’t breathe, yet he’s panting as if he’s just run all the way down to the beach. His limbs feel stiff with tension and fear runs through his body sharply, causing him to feel light headed and dizzy. He needs to see the ocean; he can’t see the ocean, he can’t see the ocean, he can’t see the ocean.

 Jackson’s hand is pressing on Jimin’s forehead, frowning at how clammy it feels and he’s confused for a moment until he sees that Jimin is fixated on the castle. It takes a few seconds of watching the young man almost choke on his fear before he realises that he’s suffering a panic attack.

 Vaguely, Jimin can hear the doctor hit the ceiling of the carriage, causing it to pull to a stop abruptly, his body rocking back with the force. There’s silence then, the sound of the wheels along the dirt path quiet now while the rhythmic hooves cease to make noise.

 “John, John we’ll head back okay? Will that make you okay? It’s alright, we’ll go back.” Jackson peeks out of the open window and instructs the driver, causing the carriage to slowly turn around in the road. Jimin spins around to keep the castle in view, his entire body shuddering violently as he tries so hard to breathe and then he finally sees it, a glimmering strip of blue in the distance.

 Instantly it’s like the immense yet invisible pressure on his chest lifts, allowing his desperate lungs to gasp in delicious air. His complexion is unbelievably pale and he’s sweating, but he can’t break his gaze from the ocean as his shaking fingers wipe away the tears he hadn’t even realised had fallen from his eyes.

 He feels ridiculous, falling apart as soon as the ocean is gone in front of the doctor, but he can’t help it. It was his home for so long, and despite the fact that it had rejected him, he still loved it. He’d never gone a day in his life without seeing the sea in some form, and the idea of never seeing it again made his heart feel hollow and his stomach roil with queasiness.

 Jackson rubs a hand along Jimin’s back, offering comfort to him as well as he can. “It’s okay John, it’s perfectly understandable that you don’t want to leave. You had a traumatic incident and the castle has become your safe place. I’ll drop you back off, make sure you’re okay and then head off myself alright?”

 Jimin nods, uncaring of the doctor’s worry despite having grown affectionate for the human. He just wants to be by the ocean again, to take comfort in its constant music that he can’t hear anymore, but that he knows still exists. It has existed long before the continents broke apart and it will exist long after Jimin is gone.

 The carriage hasn’t even made it back into the courtyard before Jimin is wrestling the door open, cursing the tiny contraptions that humans make that seem to make life harder for no reason. Jackson tries to stop him, but is unable to keep the young man inside, his lithe body slipping through his hands as he darts out into the warm sun.

 Jimin ignores his yells, turning around momentarily and waving a hand at him, a clear indication that the good doctor should continue his journey on without him. A conflicted look crosses Jackson’s face but Jimin smiles reassuringly and gestures again before walking backwards towards the cliff side path.

 By the time he turns around, the carriage is already departing once again, Jimin’s small amount of belongings placed back into the hands of some of the servants to take to his room. But as he stands on top of the cliff, looking at the calm and gentle rolling waves, he finds he doesn’t care about anything right then other than seeing his home again.

 He makes his way down to the sandy beach slowly, simply enjoying the warm breeze that cools the sweat from his brow, brushing his hair out of his face gently. The path ends finally and he stands on the hot sand, shoes and coat removed and in his hand, he simply stays still for a moment and inhales, breathing in the salty air that signifies the ocean.

 Once more, he feels a desperate yearning in his chest, a feeling clawing at his insides that he has to fight back, crushing the emotions with a cruel fist as he just can’t let himself feel that. It wouldn’t be fair when he’d chosen this life.

 Sinking into the sand, he simply sits there and watches for a few minutes, imagining what is happening beneath the surface. He wonders whether Hoseok has finally figured out how to make that medicine he’d seen once when a healer visited from the Ægirin Kingdom. It had been frustrating him for months as it had contained an ingredient that was not found in Thalassa.

 Has Taehyung finished any works lately? He’d been obsessing over his new discovery of mixing squid ink with coral to create vibrant colours that painted onto stone with ease. It was hard to paint underwater, but his brother had managed to do it. Or perhaps he had moved on to sculpting, he’d had a piece of dead coral that he’d been determined to turn into a work of art to go in the garden.

 Maybe Jungkook had…Jimin paused his thoughts abruptly at the thought, his chest feeling tight once more as he tries to think of other things. But as he watches the ocean, so calm and serene on the surface, he knows that it is anything but underneath.

 Humans have no idea, but just as life is bustling in their lands, Under The Sea is just as full and vibrant with life that goes on unnoticed. Merfolk go to school, they go to work, and they come home, hug their loved ones and spend time with them. They laugh, they love, they go to war and they live their lives to their best of their abilities. And they do so now without him.

 Swallowing thickly, he lowers his gaze from the waves as despair and longing flood through him. His brothers are all young as far as merfolk go, particularly himself, Taehyung and Jungkook. After his older brothers had been born, his parents had waited for a while before actively trying for one more child and had instead had twins, a rarity in mersociety. Jungkook had been an even bigger surprise but was loved all the more because of it.

 His older brothers however, they were much older but were still considered young and immature to a degree. Seokjin was the oldest at 52, while Yoongi was only 41. Namjoon and Hoseok had been born pretty close to each other at 36 and 37, so all of them still had a long and full life to look forward to.

 Playing with his fingers, he tries to ignore the silent tears that fall down his face as he thinks of their future without him. They are so young, with centuries of fulfilling and exciting life ahead of them and he so desperately hopes that they are happy years. Running his finger through the sand in front of him, watching as the grains give way so easily, he thinks of the nephews and nieces he’ll never see.

 Seokjin will likely have children first as they will take the throne too one day, and he has no doubt that he will be firm with them but will indulge them. It’s what he’s done with his little brothers all these years. Despite his annoyance towards his eldest brother, he still loved him intensely and hoped that he was happy when he ruled.

 But it’s Taehyung that makes his heart clench with pain, his twin brother who adored children so much. Sometimes he swore that if it wasn’t for the fact that merfolk didn’t become fertile until after their first century Taehyung would have had 5 kids by now if he could, despite their incredibly young age. He just adored them so there was absolutely zero concern about him being a good dad.

 But he’ll never see Taehyung with his daughter or son cuddled into his arms, never see the first swim or the first word. He’d never get to watch Taehyung dote on his children, a boxy smile filled with pride, or look after them for him when he wants some time alone with his partner.

 And Taehyung will never see Jimin’s children, because at this moment he doesn’t believe he’ll even be alive in four months time. Not to mention they would be human, so how would that even work?

 Pulling his knees tightly to his body, he rests his forehead on them as his tears start to fall rapidly. He’s never been more thankful that he has no voice, as if he did all that would be heard would be his heart broken sobs as he finally comes to terms with what he’d lost.

 The normally comforting sound of the waves crashing against the beach instead became a source of pain, the sound scraping at his heart and reminding him of a life that he would never have. He’d had everything he could ever want, including a family who loved him but it was gone now.

 What was worse was that he wasn’t even sure if this was worth it, living on land. He enjoyed living here for the most part, learning about the humans and their strange inventions and contraptions but at the same time it disgusted him, which he had never expected.

 The poverty he had witnessed in the village had hollowed his stomach with shock, yet when they had returned to the palace the first time and the Princess and Jackson had reported on their conditions, it had simply met condescension and laughter. Many had laughed at the idea of the poor villagers giving food to royalty, as if they could ever compare to the highly skilled bakers and chefs the palace employed.

 Jimin had stood by and watched with anger as they berated people who had nothing yet had still tried to give what little they had to people who lived a gilded life. He’d ended up standing abruptly, his chair squealing against the floor as it flew backwards and storming out of the hall.

 He was well aware that he was also a Prince and someone of royalty, but the difference was that Poseidon himself had split the sea into kingdoms and chosen the rulers from his offspring. While all merfolk originated from Poseidon, most had simply been created from sea foam whereas the royal lines were brought to life from unions between Poseidon and sea nymphs, providing them with the potential for powers to protect their kingdoms.

 The humans believed that they ruled with the grace of God, however they were just the people who had the most luck when the kingdom was formed. Jimin’s father could use the power of Poseidon to protect Thalassa when needed, turning the tide or shaking the Earth.

 And yet he loved all the people in his kingdom and cared for them as well as he could. If offered food, he would gratefully accept and eat it then and there. His family had been taught many times that they were royal simply because they had the luck of being born from nymphs and a god, and Poseidon was more than happy to take the power away if necessary.

 It had happened in the furthest kingdom, Amathauntania, when the rulers had grown cruel and self-righteous. Poseidon had stripped them of powers and had the Earth crack itself open to form a trench that formed their new, cold and dark home.

 But these humans had no such checks and balances, which meant the rich, grew richer and laughed at those who could not help themselves. As he sat there on the beach, the bright and hot sun beating down on his back causing him to sweat lightly, he stared at the legs that he’d suffered so much for.

 Was this really how he wanted to live? Was it worth losing his family to live with such selfish people?

 Sudden pressure on his shoulder caused him to jerk in surprise, looking up at the figure standing next to him. The sun directly behind them caused him to squint slightly, the bright light blinding his vision as he lifted up a hand to shield them.

 The person sat next to him gratefully and as his eyes adjusted to the light once more, his gaze flickered over the newcomer in shock repeatedly. She wore a dress of pure white, the colour startling in its purity against the rich yellow of the sand and the vibrant blue of the ocean and sky.

 Soft and light, it moved with the breeze like water, rippling along her body and if he looked hard enough, he would swear that the colour was almost iridescent if that was possible.

 Bringing his eyes back up, they widened once again as his mind confirmed what he was seeing. She was just as beautiful as when he’d first seen her, though now her hair was no longer the white it had been when they first met. In the air of the Above Sea, it had dried into soft and gentle curls that fell down her back and swayed gently with each soft breeze.

 She was just as beautiful on land as she had been in the sea.

 Opening his mouth, he was confused momentarily when nothing came out before remembering his muteness once again. Quickly, he reverted to mersign, pleased to finally be able to communicate to someone after weeks of nothing.

 “What are you doing here? How are you here? You have legs!” He pointed with shock at the last statement, eyes looking at the elegant legs that peeked out from the white dress.

 She laughed softly, the sound soft and gentle, reminding him of his own mothers laugh and his eyes closed involuntarily as yet another wave of sorrow rolled over him.

 “Oh my dear sweet Prince Jimin. I hope you haven’t forgotten that I’m a sea witch right?” Her lips turned up at the corner slightly, amusement resonating from her in waves that even he could see. His own mouth turned up at the sight of her and he suddenly felt the sorrow vanish, lightness and happiness replacing it at seeing someone from his home.

 “You’re right, I’m going to assume you didn’t have to suffer some horrific pain to get them either right?” His hands held in the air for a moment after he finished signing and she shook her head, pushing a lock of hair behind her ear before frowning.

 Leaning over, she wiped away the tears that still stained his cheeks like a painting gently. Eyes wide like saucers watched her, a soft pink blush like the roses in the palace garden he’d been shown spreading over his cheeks and his stomach felt like it was twisting around suddenly.

 “I didn’t have to suffer no, because this is not permanent. Now sweet Prince, what has your heart in so much pain I can hear it in the Trench? I thought this was supposed to be your dream, yet everyday the waves tell me of the unhappiness that is swallowing you like a whirlpool. Is it the Princess? Is she not what you expected? Cruel? Unkind?” She queried lightly, lowering her hand before facing the sea.

 He watched her in silence, admiring the elegant profile of her face in the midday light. Turning his gaze back to the sand, he rubbed his chest lightly as his heart felt as if he had swam to another kingdom and back.

 “No, no the Princess is kind. She’s perfect actually,” his hands froze mid-sign as he contemplated how much he should say before they continued on. “Humans are fascinating, still as fascinating as when I thought. But they’re…selfish and cruel, particularly those high up. I can’t communicate as they don’t speak mersign and I cannot read their language.” The words tumbled out of his faster than his hands could sign out, frustration evident in the stiffness of his words.

 There is silence for a moment, involuntary from him but entirely voluntary from her as she watches the horizon.

 “I tried to warn you Jimin, many people tried to warn you. Sometimes it’s better to watch from afar than to get up close, there’s less chance of disappointment then.” She looks at him with a sad smile and mortification washed over Jimin as he realised she was talking about herself.

 “There is beauty in this world though, have you found that too?” Nodding, he thinks of the villagers and the children, a gentle grin passing over his face.

 “There’s a village on the other side of the cliffs, it’s small and poor but there’s happiness there. The children smile at me with such sweetness despite the hunger that pinches their stomachs. I enjoy spending time with them.” He admits shyly.

 She giggles and pushes away some of his thick hair, despite the fact it bounces back immediately, and he simply watches her. He listens as she explains some of the good points that humanity has and things he should look out for, but he yearns to simply touch her for some reason. It must be because she is from the ocean, and he has not touched something from the ocean for a while now.

 At that, his mood saddens and he looks away with a frown. She pauses and watches him in turn, placing a hand on his arm lightly.

 “What’s wrong?” Her query is quiet and earnest. If he knew better, he’d keep silent but his need to finally communicate takes over and his hands are moving before he realises.

 “The sea has rejected me. Like you said it would. I haven’t tasted food from the ocean in a long time now and it burns if I touch the waves. She gets angry at me if I persist so I’ve stopped.” His head lowers in shame as he finally admits what he’s been trying to ignore for so long. “My home has rejected me, the ocean hates me for what I did.”

 He doesn’t expect sympathy from the sea witch, after all she tried to warn him many times that there would be severe repercussions for his decision. But a sea witch was an enigma and he could not hope to understand her as she lets out a deep exhale slowly.

 “I know my Prince. I feel her anger whenever you try. But please know that she doesn’t hate you. Her anger covers her hurt; she is hurt by your decision. She has watched as you were born and as you grew only to watch as you turned your back on her and your family. She feels the pain your family is experiencing and so lashes out at you in turn.” Her hand rubs his arm soothingly and his eyes feel hot and aching as they fill once more with tears.

 “My family is hurting?” His hands are trembling violently as he tries to hold in his emotions that threaten to bubble at the words. “Are they okay? What’s wrong with them? Are they safe?”

 Staring forward as the white topped waves, he feels the strongest urge to jump into them and swim for his home to protect them. But he can’t and his hands fist themselves involuntarily, shaking at the tension.

 The sea witch pauses for a second, watching his body tighten with tautness and emotion before sighing gently. Taking one of his hands, she encourages him to unclench it before allowing his hand to engulf her own. Stroking the back calmingly, she begins to speak softly.

 “Your family is fine, they’re in no danger. I promise you that. They are…hurting emotionally. The kingdom…the kingdom has been mourning you, as they believe you are dead. Your brothers grieve and your parents are trying to govern as best they can.” Ice runs through Jimin’s veins at her words and the tears finally begin to fall.

 “I know you want to know about them so I will tell you, though I fear it will do your mental state no good. Your eldest brothers have thrown themselves into their work to try and cope, and I know the Crown Prince has taken responsibility for you.

 “Your youngest brothers however…” She trails off and Jimin can tell that she doesn’t want to tell him. Turning around onto his knees, he grips her shoulders firmly and mouths out for her to tell him. He has to know how his little brothers are.

 The sea witch takes a deep breath, biting her lip nervously before averting her eyes. “Your youngest brothers are not coping. Jungkook blames himself for letting you out, he feels that it’s his fault and so he’s withdrawn from everyone. Your family worries for him deeply.

 “And Taehyung…he is…I’m not sure how to word this without it hurting you more. But Taehyung has lost his zest for life. He no longer does anything related to art as he’s lost all inspiration, despite how much your brothers try to encourage him. Taehyung is unhappy, he is very unhappy.” There’s more, Jimin can tell there’s more but suddenly he doesn’t want to know.

 Standing up abruptly, he begins to walk along the beach, wiping furiously at the tears that won’t stop falling. His fractured sobs are silent but in his head they are loud and screaming and he deserves it. For a moment, he feels the most intense urge to hurt himself to make up for it, his family is in pain and he has caused it, it’s only fair.

 Turning suddenly, he begins to make his way to the ocean, his breathing choked as his throat convulses from the force of his crying. He has broken the beautiful spirit of his twin, the artistic soul that he has admired for so many years has been shattered because of his selfish needs and wants.

 And poor Jungkookie, so young and sweet and innocent yet labouring with the belief that he is the cause for his brother’s death on his shoulders. Jimin had abused his younger brothers trust so horrifically and he deserved whatever agony the ocean threw at him.

 He was selfish, he was selfish, he was selfish and he did not deserve any happiness, not when his brothers suffered.

 “Prince Jimin! Wait! No!” The sea witch grasps his arm tightly, tugging him to a stop and he moves to yank his arm from her grip in his pain. She holds on tight though, dragging him back from the water that has already begun to roil with anger.

 While he had been reduced to the strength of a human, the sea witch was still very much a mermaid with her strength in tact and he has no choice but to follow despite his wishes.

 After a few tense moments of pushing and pulling though, he’s finally free only to find himself hitting an invisible wall that prevents him reaching the pain that the ocean will offer him.

 Wailing silently, he falls onto his knees and begins to pound the sand in despair, choking on his breath as his chest hiccups with his sobs. Pressing his head into the wet sand, he wishes desperately for a way to make up to his family for what he’s done.

 Pressing a fist to his chest, his heart feels as though it’s being squeezed tightly and his stomach twists and turns violently, causing him to feel nauseous and a twisted part of him wishes he would vomit. He had discovered that vomiting was a thing humans did sometimes, and it burned his throat, maybe that would be enough.

 A light touch on his back pulls him away from some of his dark thoughts and he lifts his head slowly to look into the steady gaze of the sea witch. Her eyes are full of sympathetic pain and sadness for having to tell him this. He has no doubt that right now; his own gaze is lifeless and dead despite the redness and puffiness of his eyes.

 Closing them, he takes a few ragged breaths and manages to control his breathing finally with a little bit of effort, his lungs expanding and contracting as the hot air fills them and then leaves.

 Lifted his hands from the densely packed sand, he brings them up and begins to sign slowly, the trembling evident despite how eerily calm he suddenly appears.

 “I have ruined my family and broken my brothers because I was selfish and immature. I thought only of myself and yet it’s ruined their lives. How can I live on land with the knowledge they’re hurting? You should just let me go.” His head drops with shame.

 “Prince Jimin, you are young and naïve. You made a bad decision but your brothers will be happy again, I swear they will. We live long lives after all. They do not know that you are alive; I did not think I should tell them in case you don’t succeed, but please do not hurt yourself like this. It would cause them far more pain to know you were thinking these things.” Her voice is soothing as her hand strokes his back gently.

 “You’re feeling many things right now because of your confusion, but please do not try and hurt yourself. The ocean will forgive you eventually and your brothers will be happy again, I did not tell you these things to hurt you but so you can understand. The decision you made was life changing, only it didn’t just affect your life.” His hands grip her dress above her knees tightly and he simply watches as his tears dampen the sheer material, his tears becoming grey spots that mar the beauty.

 The stress and loneliness that the human world had caused in him over the last two and a half months combined with this new agony at the knowledge of what he’d caused resulted in his emotions finally spilling over. He didn’t know what to do with himself or what to think as his mind blanked into white noise.

 Instead he simply knelt forward, his forehead resting on her knees as he cried with his whole body, his emotions causing his body to shake violently with each silent sob as he fell apart.

 There was no noise as he did so, only the gentle sound of the ocean lapping the shore and the carefree shrieks of the seagulls that spun in the air overhead. Any embarrassment he may have had at ruining the sea witches dress or for being too emotional was mitigated by the way her gentle fingers ran through his hair, placating him and encouraging him to simply cry and let it out.

 And so he did.

You invited yourself to some snacks and a drink from his kitchen as you rambled on about how horrible your date was. Seungcheol finally looked up from his studying so he could watch you make yourself comfortable in amusement. Watching you binge on all of his junk food was always something he never got tired of.

“You’re telling me talking about games didn’t make you want to just rip your clothes off?” he teased. “A bit picky, aren’t you?”

“You’re one to talk! Didn’t you reject a date because her fingers weren’t pretty?”

“They were dirty, dry, and her cuticles were flaking. It’s basic hygiene, _____! If she couldn’t even take care of her hands, who knows what else she neglects!”

“Fine, so we both have impossibly high standards, but it’s because both you and I are too good for anyone.”

“At least we can both agree on that.”

“How long have you been studying?”

“Since four.”

“What!?” Upon hearing that, you jumped up from your slumped state and pulled two bottles from his fridge. “Alright, time for a study break, my friend.”

“I can’t, I have a midterm on Monday -”

“You always overwork yourself, ‘Cheol. Take a break and talk with your best friend once in a while, will ya? You know, your brain retains information better if you take breaks.”

“Oh, yeah? Does the alcohol help with that?”

“No, it’s your incentive - a completely separate element.” You handed Seungcheol a bottle before closing all of his textsbooks for him. He sighed loudly, fully knowing he couldn’t fight you. But he took the bottle graciously with his cute, cheeky smile that you loved so much. You two clinked your bottles together to begin his break.

“It’s been a while since you and I have just hung out together,” he noted to you.

“Yeah, guess whose fault is that?”

“Don’t use that tone with me, missy. I’m sorry I can’t help that our midterm schedules conflict with each other.”

“You know that’s not what I meant.”

The real reason you and Seungcheol haven’t spent time together recently was because he occupied nearly all of his free time to his new girlfriend. They’ve only been dating for about two months, but they never leave each other’s side! When you wanted to eat lunch with him, she was there; when you called him on the phone, she would always answer; and when you asked him to pick you up after a night out, she was the one driving.

At first you thought it was because she was jealous of how close you two were, but it was the opposite. When Seungcheol told you it was because she was kissing up to you and wanted The Best Friend Approval, you almost didn’t believe it because it sounded completely ridiculous. Needless to say, she was already off to a bad start, considering it’s been two months since you and him had more than two minutes of alone time together.

“I’m surprised she’s not sitting on your lap as you study.”

“Ha ha… I told her to stay home tonight because I can’t focus when she’s around.”

“Ugh, I don’t want to know the reason why,” you groaned. “At least she finally gave you some breathing room after two months.”

“If you don’t like her ~” he trailed off, hinting he could end it with her any moment.

“No, no… She’s tolerable… And she makes you happy, so I guess she can get half of a point from me.”

“So generous of you,” he quipped, kicking you from under the table.

“Just because I’m lonely and unlovable doesn’t mean you should have to suffer like me.”

“Aw, don’t talk about yourself like that!” Seungcheol scoots his chair over to you and pulls you into a good ol’ knuckle sandwhich. “You’re not lonely and unlovable! You have me, and your Mom loves you.”

“Good one, Cheolie.”

“Wow, you haven’t called me Cheolie since freshman year. Are you drunk already or do you miss me that much?”

“No. I’m just feeling nostalgic, that’s all.”

“Sure you are.”

You and Seungcheol spent the rest of the night drinking whatever alcohol he had left in his apartment. It wasn’t much, but it was enough that you felt tipsy. The two of you used to spend countless nights just hanging out and talking with a drink or two all of the time in your early years of college, but as graduation was approaching, those nights became less frequent, and even more less frequently now that he has a girlfriend. So tonight, you were going to cherish this time you had with Seungcheol.

“I’m going to die alone,” you cried dramatically as you laid your head down on his kitchen table. The past couple of hours, you and him were just talking about the old times and past relationships and Seungcheol just had to remind you about that you haven’t been in a committed relationship for three years now and that you’ve only been coasting through the dating scene.

“No, you won’t. You might just… get married really late?”

“I bet by then I won’t be able to have children.”

“Don’t talk like that about yourself, _____. Do you remember how long I was single for before I met Yunah?"

"Twenty three years."

"Exactly! Your three years doesn't even compare to my twenty three. Besides, I bet the guy out there that was meant for you will be worth the long wait. He'll have to get through me first, though."

"But what if it's taking me so long because no one wants me?" you pouted, taking another swig at your drink.

"Hey," Seungcheol nudged you to look at him. When you lifted your head, he had his arms out wide open, telling you to come in for a hug. You slowly scooted your chair towards him and laid your head on his shoulder lazily as he rubbed your shoulder assuringly. "Anyone would be crazy not to want you. You're an amazing friend, and I bet even a more amazing partner."

"You're the only man in my life that likes me, can you believe that?"

"Unsurprisingly, I can."

"Honestly, I don't think I'll ever find someone who will like me for who I am more than you."

"You better, or else you'll actually never marry."

As you both sat in silence, your thoughts flashed through many moments you've shared with Seungcheol. You two have watched each other grow up over the years and you knew each other like you knew the backs of your hands and that included Seungcheol knowing how badly you wanted to get married. You used to talk to him about your infinite Pinterest boards about cakes, dresses, and venues and how you wanted him to be your Man of Honor, and all of the details in between.

Seungcheol never asked you about what kind of man you wanted to marry. He knew your type, or at least the superficial parts of it, but never what you looked for in a husband and to be quite honest, you've never thought about it, either. At least until now. Sitting next to your best friend, a bit intoxicated, and emotionally thinking about the inevitability of your relationship status got you thinking.

What kind of man did you want to marry?

Well, he had to be handsome, of course. And a good sense of humor was always a requirement. Intelligent, kind, and playful were all necessary, too. You wanted to marry someone who would support you no matter what and would only build up your confidence, never tearing it down one bit. You wanted to grow together, even if it meant falling down a couple of times. They sound like the basic elements of a husband, but for some reason, you could never find all of those qualities in a single man.

Except Seungcheol.

Well, besides the fact that he was handsome… Seungcheol was average on a good day.

“Cheol-ster,” you slurred as you struggled to sit up properly to face him. You hadn’t had the chance to get a good look at his face the past few hours, but you now noticed how red his cheeks were. You forgot he turned red easily when he drank. “Let’s make a deal.”

“Ok.”

“You don’t even know the deal yet…”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“What if I asked you to marry me, you’d still agree?”

“Very funny.” He stared at you for a solid ten seconds to realize you weren’t kidding. “Oh, my God, you’re serious. _____, I have a girlfriend -”

“Not now, you idiot!” you scolded, hitting his arm. “I mean later. Like, way later. Like if we’re both single by thirty-something, both hate dating people like five years younger than us, both hate our lives, and just want to settle down with a dog or two or three.”

“Marry each other as a desperate attempt at life?”

“Yes!”

“How romantic…”

“But think about it! Think of all the benefits that come with being married to each other. We already know what we’re like around each other, I practically live with you already so we got that situation out of the way, we can be each other’s emergency contacts - there’s no downside to this!”

“We might as well be celibate.”

“Oh, shit,” you cursed. You forgot about the whole sex part when it came to marriage… “Ok, so there’s one downside, but don’t the pros outweight the cons!?”

“Why are you like this all of a sudden?”

“Because now that you finally have a girlfriend, I can see how you are around her and it makes me jealous in a way that I miss having that, you know? You’re the one person who knows how much I want to get married. I just want to secure something because at this rate, I really will be single my entire life.”

“So I’m your last resort?” he pouted.

“Oh, come on, don’t act like that! You know I’d love to get married to my best friend!”

You gave Seungcheol the puppy eyes that he could never say no to. Even when drinking, he knew that this wasn’t the brightest idea ever, but how could he turn your lonely self down like that?

“… Fine.” He covered his ears instinctively when he heard you screech with joy. “But I’ll only agree if you agree on three simple conditions.”

“Shoot.”

“One, this is if and only if we are both single by thirty.”

“Deal.”

“Two, if I cook, you have to do the dishes.”

“You’re pushing it, but that’s completely fair, I get it.”

“And three, I get to rap at our wedding.”

“No, absolutely not.”

“It’s all or nothing, _____.”

“I refuse to let you rap your vows to me.”

“Take it or leave it,” he threatened.

You couldn’t believe that this was his ultimatum to you, but he was just as serious as you were about his whole ordeal.

“Ugh, fine!” you groaned, caving in. “I hate you.”

“Don’t hate me too much, you might have to deal with me for the rest of your life.”

“I have reached a new low.”

As a silent agreement, Seungcheol raised his almost-empty bottle to you. You clinked yours against his begrudgingly and chugged whatever was left in your bottle.

“Cheers to the next seven years. Let’s see where life takes us,” Seungcheol said.

“Seungcheol, I need your help! It’s an emergency!” you panicked when you opened the door to his place.

His eyes were glued to the TV screen when he gave you a nod of acknowledgment. You sat beside him on the couch and watch him vigorously play a game of Fornite with his headset on.

“I’m half-listening,” he said.

“This is going to sound ridiculous, but I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend.”

“What!?” Seungcheol was so shocked by your proposal that the one second he looked away from the TV to look at you, his character died instantly.

“Hear me out before you say no! So you know my cousin’s getting married, right? He’s making me the only person in the family who is unmarried and single and I cannot face my entire family unless I bring a date.”

“Why can’t you ask Jeonghan, or something?” he asked, starting up a new game.

“See, that’s where this gets difficult…” you smiled sheepishly. “Don’t hate me, but I kind of have been pretending you were my boyfriend for a whole year now…”

“What!?” Oops, he died again. “A whole year!? Why didn’t you tell me!?”

“Because I was hoping I’d have a boyfriend to bring to the wedding by now and then I could lie and say that you broke up with me!”

“Unbelievable… You are hopeless.”

“I know, that’s why I need you to pretend with me! Please ~! They think I’m lying! Well, I mean I am, but I want to prove myself to them for once, you know? Think of it as practice for when we turn thirty!” You begged again, using your famous puppy eyes that you’ve been using to your advantage way too frequently lately.

Seungcheol groaned loudly, throwing his head back in defeat. “You owe me big time. Like a three-course meal once a week big time.”

“Yeah, totally, whatever you want!” You lunged at your best friend and gave him the tightest hug. “Ah, you’re the best!”

“So when’s the wedding?”

“… This Sunday.”

“What the hell, _____, that’s in like three days!”

“Sorry! I completely forgot about it until my Mom texted me an hour ago!”

“You’re so lucky my anniversary is the day before.”

“Oh, yeah, I forgot you have another woman in your life that isn’t me,” you snorted. “How long have you two been dating now?”

“Six months.”

“Ugh, it feels like it’s been three years.”

“Don’t be like that. Now leave, she’s coming over in an hour and I haven’t seen her all week.”

“Wear protection, my friend,” you said as you ruffled his hair playfully. “Try to look decent on Sunday.”

“Same to you.”

Normally, you don’t care much to impress your family with the way you look or how you carry yourself. But tonight was a big deal for you. Being one of the youngest in the family, it was natural that you would be one of the last ones to get married, but when you found out your youngercousin, who has been with his fiancé for nearly four years now, was getting married before you, you decided to get your shit together and show your family that you were totally capable of maintaining a relationship.

You stumbled outside of Seungcheol’s apartment struggling to walk in your heels. After knocking vigorously on the door, Yunah opened it up for you with a bright, fake smile.

“_____!” she squealed, pulling you into an awkward hug. “You look so pretty!”

“Ah, hey, Yunah! Thanks, you too, as usual.”

“Oh, stop it ~ Come on in, Seungie’s almost ready.” You cringed at her nickname for him when she turned around and went back inside.

“Thanks for letting me borrow him. I don’t know what I would do if I showed up to a wedding without a date,” you sighed.

“It’s no problem at all! I always feel bad that I take him away from you so often. He needs to spend time with you once in a while.”

“I’m not a child,” Seungcheol said as he walked out of his room straigtening his tie. “You guys act like I’m the son of divorced parents…”

You gawked at your best friend as he walked towards the two of you. He wore all black, from head to toe, and even fixed his messy, fluffy hair a little bit. He looked like he was ready to walk the red carpet, and you’ve never seen your best friend look so stunning before.

“Hello?” he called, snapping his fingers in front of your face. “Earth to _____.”

“Huh? Oh, hey…!”

“I know, I look sexy in all-black, huh?”

“You look presentable,” you lied.

“Don’t listen to her, you look very handsome ~” Yunah gushed before she pulled Seungcheol in for a deep kiss.

The scene in front of you made you want to throw up and throw yourself down the stairs. This wasn’t the first time you’ve seen them kiss, but it gets worse the more you witness it. “Ugh, gross…”

“Ok, let’s get going. I want to make it there before the open bar closes.” Seungcheol gives Yunah one last parting kiss before you both leave his apartment.

“You look dashing tonight,” he teased. “I haven’t seen you in a dress like this since freshman homecoming.”

“You know I hate wearing dresses like this. I’m only wearing it because I need to look like an adult with her life together in front of my family.”

“Good thing I’m here then. I’ll be your personal hypeman.”

“I should rent you out to bring to family functions more often.”

“That’s a large price to pay.”

The two of you arrived at the wedding around the same time as everyone else did and the venue was packed. Half of it was full of aunts, uncles, and cousins from across the world that you haven’t seen since you were a little girl and the other half was the fiancé’s side of the family. There had to be at least three hundred people here.

On top of that, all of the decorations were so beautiful and detailed. Your cousin had the type of chairs you wanted for your wedding, large center pieces at each table, and hundreds of twinkling lights hanging from the ceiling. The inner desperate and younger you was squealing at all of the wedding galore.

It only reminded you of how alone you really were.

“Quick, to the bar,” you guided, taking Seungcheol by the wrist.

“We don’t even know where we’re sitting yet!”

After getting a couple of drinks for each of you, you wanted to sit at your table as quickly as you could. Maybe the reception would move faster that way. Your seats were located near the dancefloor and the bridal party’s tables, right where your parents and a few other cousins sat.

“You didn’t tell me I was meeting your parents!” Seungcheol hissed to you.

“Did you think they weren’t going to be here!?”

“I don’t know, I didn’t prepare anything! We didn’t prepare anything!”

“We’ll be fine! It’s not like you don’t know anything about me!” You plastered on the biggest smile on your face when your parents got up to hug you. “Hi, Mom, Dad.”

“_____, I’m so happy you came! And with Seungcheol, too! We’re so happy to finally meet you!” In her ecstatic state, your Mom hugged Seungcheol even tighter than how Yunah does.

“Nice to meet you both,” Seungcheol said, clearly nervous from the way your Dad eyed him suspiciously.

“I can’t believe he’s real!” One of your cousins snorted. “And he’s hot!”

“Hey!” you scolded.

“No offense, but we all thought you were fake.”

“Yeah, she warned me about that.”

Throughout most of the dinner, you were so nervous that you were almost sweating. A situation like this wasn’t even serious, even if Seungcheol were to slip up, but the wedding atmosphere just really made you anxious. The drinks only helped a little bit. It was mostly your parents who asked the two of you questions about your relationship. They asked basic things, like how he asked you out, what was your first date like, does Seungcheol wear condoms - you know, basic things…

But as dinner moved forward, you started to relax a bit. Seungcheol was answering all of the questions quite impressively and it made this whole fake boyfriend thing look very much believable. You were surprised with his acting skills - who knew Seungcheol would make a great boyfriend?

“Tell me, Seungcheol,” your Dad began. Oh no, this sounded like it was going to be one of those Dad questions… “What do you like about our daughter?”

“Dad!” you hissed.

“C’mon, can’t her family wonder what this boy thinks about our precious daughter?”

“You’re so embarrassing!”

“Yeah, Seungcheol. Tell us all what you see in this little brat,” your cousin teased.

“What do I like about her?” Seungcheol repeated.

You slowly shrunk in your chair. This was it, this was how your whole family was going to find out about your fake boyfriend and how you’ll be single forever…

“When we first met, she was the closed-off girl on our residence floor. She always hung out in her dorm, and when she wasn’t, she was in the community room in the corner couch with her headphones in. When the rest of our floor was out having fun at parties, she would finally prop the door open to her dorm room and blast her music. One time, I stayed back because I had an exam the Monday after and I just talked to her the whole night. At first, we made it a weekly thing to hang out, but it gradually become more frequent. During those times, I’ve gotten to know her a lot more. She was cold, but she opened up her heart to me so easily. We were friends for a long time before we started dating, so I came to her for anything and everything and she came to me, and it was all the more reason to like her. In those past four years, I’ve seen her be kind, intelligent, gentle, angry, sad, frustrated… I’ve seen it all at this point, but it’s part of the infinite reasons why I love her. And even after all of that, I still can’t take my eyes off of her.”

Throughout his whole speech, you looked at Seungcheol with wide eyes. You couldn’t stop staring at him even when he finished. You thought that he was going to tell them a fake story about how you met at a coffee shop or something, but he told them a story full of truth, one that you kept in your heart. The day you met Seungcheol was when your life changed for the better and hearing him repeat it back to your family in a way that made your heart flutter brought tears to your eyes.

And to your Mother’s…

“And you two have only been dating for a year?” your cousin asked. “It feels like you guys have been married for ten years.”

“Oh boy, you made her mother cry!” your Dad chuckled as he teased your Mom. “That story deserves a drink. Let me buy you one.”

“Thanks.” Seungcheol shot you a quick wink before he got up to go with your Dad to the bar.

“I like him,” your Mother smiled as she gently wiped her tears. “I like him a lot!”

“Clearly. I think you and Dad like him more than I do.”

“Even better!”

The rest of the night went on extremely smoothly, which made you even more anxious than before. It was probably because you couldn’t take your mind off of what Seungcheol said about you to your parents. You spent your college years with him mostly teasing each other and only ever said sincere words to each other when either of you was upset or really needed to hear some sort of validation. Maybe it was the wedding fever, but the whole night, you thought about how much you really appreciated Seungcheol and how Yunah was so lucky to have him.

The wedding fever hit it’s high point when your cousin and his now-wife danced alone together on the dancefloor. You could hear a collective, longing sigh throughout the venue from all of the ladies in the room, you included. The dancefloor opened up to the whole room once the lovely couple finished their first dance, and you and Seungcheol were the only ones left at the table.

“How am I doing so far?” he asked.

“You’re way too good at this for someone who has only been in a relationship for six months.”

“Yeah, I had some practice with Yunah’s parents not too long ago, so this was a piece of cake.”

“I bet. Do her parents love you more than she does, too?”

“No, that’s not possible.”

As you sat in silence for a bit and admired the couples on the dancefloor, Seungcheol took this opportunity to look at you while you were distracted. The look on your face wasn’t necessarily sad, but it was something else - like you were longing for something. He hadn’t seen you like this since your last boyfriend broke up with you, and he remembered how devastated you were.

You looked at Seungcheol with a brow raised when he stood up.

“C’mon, let’s dance.”

“Dance? With you? No, thanks.”

“If I don’t force you to, your parents will.” Seungcheol nudged his head over to your parents on the dancefloor who ushered you to join them.

“Fine, but if you step on my feet, it’s over.”

The song was slow and gentle, muttering lyrics about how much the singer loved their partner. Seungcheol bowed to you embarrassingly before wrapped his arms around your waist. Hesitantly, you put your hands on his shoulders.

“This isn’t some awkward middle school dance,” he teased. “Don’t be afraid of me.”

With that said, he forced you to wrap your arms fully around his neck, forcing you to close the gap between the two of you. You two were so close that you could smell his cologne and shampoo. There was something that was pulling the two of you even closer together - like a magnet. So close that your noses were almost touching. You never noticed how long his eyelashes looked, how clear his skin was, and especially how soft his lips looked…

Oh no, this was bad, this was really bad! You can’t be thinking these things about him! And why now, of all times, when you’ve known him for four years! What was even worse was that he was looking at you and thinking the same things, too, and you knew it by the way you caught him staring at your lips.

What surprised you the most was that he was the one to lean in and kiss you. You returned the kiss immediately, shocked by how soft his lips were against yours. It was a short, simple kiss, but it was one that struck you in your core.

When he pulled away, he pressed his forehead against yours.

“What are we doing?”

The car ride home was a long and silent one. The air was tense and awkward and it was all your fault! If you just sucked up your pride and just went to the damn wedding alone, you wouldn’t be in this mess! You couldn’t believe you just ruined four whole years of friendship in one, desperate night -

“Hey,” Seungcheol said, shaking you from your thoughts. “I’m sorry about… you know, what happened back there when we were dancing…”

“No, it was my fault -”

“I should have kept my distance -”

“I should have set some boundaries -”

“It won’t happen again, you know -”

“It’d be best if we could just forget about all about it -”

“It was a mistake, and Yunah doesn’t have to know.”

“Yeah…” you breathed out. “A mistake.”

When he pulled up to your place, you were almost too scared to get out of the car. The minute you stepped out, your entire relationship with him was going to change, and that was the last thing you wanted. If you could rewind and prevent that kiss, you would in a heart beat, but for now, you wanted to stay in this moment forever so you wouldn’t lose your best friend.

“This won’t change anything, right…?” you whispered.

“Not unless we want it to,” he reassured. “We just have to pretend like it didn’t happen.”

“Yeah, you’re right. I’ll head on in now. Thanks again. Not just for tonight, but for everything.”

“_____, nothing’s going to change -”

“I know! I just don’t appreciate you as much as I should, you know?”

“You’re a great friend, too,” he said, ruffling your hair playfully. “You still wanna get married at thirty, right?”

“If that’s ok with you,” you smiled.

“Just making sure ~ Good night.”

“Text me when you get home.”