#panic attack ment

it might take him a little bit to readjust to zero actually being there to help, but for the most part the methods she used before he was abducted still work!

I don’t- don’t think this is a panic attack, e-exactly? He just, just seems more... Dazed? Out- out of it? If that makes sense. 

Benrey are you- you able to tell me what happened? It’s okay if you- you need a moment!

...

nightmares. freaked out. red everywhere. 

--Benrey closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.--

Red?

Red’s bad. 

TW: Panic Attack.

Ray 

Ray knows what it feels like to have intense anxiety. He's often overwhelmed and feels as though his world is going to collapse in on him. It doesn't grow into a panic attack unless something jostles him horribly but it can happen every once in a while. 

He is no stranger to it but he's never experienced being around another person who has the same issue as him. He's never even considered that somebody like you could have struggles like this but when he realizes that you're in bad shape, he forgets how much he hates himself and instead focuses on you. 

You're the only one that matters. 

Ray finds you curled up in the corner of the room with your arms tucked around your legs as you tried on focus on your breathing but it was obvious that you were barely pulling a breath into your lungs each time you sucked in air. It hit him hard that you were overwhelmed. 

His heart is in a frenzy, so his first action may not be the smartest. He will rush to your side and prompt you with a few questions, then he’d realize that hey, you shouldn’t be talking right now and you need to focus on something else. That’s part of his failure. 

He would do his best to coax you through the worst part of it, his sweet words may not be enough but it’s the gesture that counts. Ray understands that you want to think about anything else. He’s quick to tell you about how he wants to spend more time with you and how he doesn’t want you to feel so alone here in Magenta. He’ll spend a good chunk of time just talking to you about this and that so you can focus on his voice instead of dread.

He might get a little upset himself that you felt so horrible and didn’t feel like you could ask him for help, but he won’t tell you about that. First and foremost, he just sits with you, holding your hand until you feel the worst of the dread leave your body. 

He will likely continue to stay later then he should do and he’ll take whatever punishment that comes from it. He talks a lot and his grip on your hand tightens every now and again.

Ray understands what you’re feeling, he just will ask you a lot about what you need to help you in case it happens again. He may overtalk or do the wrong thing but his heart is in. 

Suit Saeran 

Saeran knows what it feels like to have a panic attack but when he has them it’s a flurry of dissociation and/or rage. He will go quiet and stare off into space or he will destroy everything around him just to feel something besides dread and fear in his heart. It’s never been something he enjoyed in the slightest and he hates when it happens. 

He already knows that you’ve got this problem. You went through a few minor panic attacks when you were with Ray, but you lied to him every time that it happened as you didn’t want to worry him. But, Saeran knew that you were swallowing your fears. It was pathetic. You could have had that idiot tending to your hand and foot from the start. 

Saeran would give you credit for one thing, you didn’t abuse that idiot’s kindness. It didn’t make you a saint or anything but at least to the long list of errors that he had written about you, that wasn’t one thing that he had to add right to the bottom. 

The first time you suffer from a major panic attack is when you’re with him and you can’t hide it. He was toying with you, trying to make you crack but when he finally did manage to break you, he almost immediately felt a sense of guilt and panic rush into his own veins. Your eyes went blank and your breath quickened, and you stopped responding to him. 

It didn’t register to him at first. 

He thought that you had merely gone slack because you had finally given up. That wasn’t the case. You weren’t so much bothered with him, you had gotten overwhelmed from everything that had happened to you and perhaps to him. The sight of you torn to pieces didn’t bring him as much glee as he thought he would. He was quick to jostle your shoulders to try and shake some sense into you but that didn’t help. 

His own panic rose, and something inside of him just did not feel good. He held you close to him and demanded that you listen to him, and he coached you through your breathing because he wasn’t about to let his toy die on him when they had to make up to him everything they had done thus far. His voice is stern and he doesn’t know how to help but to his credit, his commands are strong enough that you have no choice but to listen to him. 

He may continue to hold you if you cry or continue to crumble, but he will never let you bring up this incident even again after it’s over. He shows you a moment of kindness, and it will be this that reminds you that Saeran isn’t just an angry person. 

Saeran 

After everything that happened in Mint Eye, it was obvious that you both were struggling a lot with anxiety. Things didn’t just go away when you escaped from that place, no, many ghosts lingered around and haunted you and Saeran and they would continue to do so for some time. Saeran was okay with that because he could be with you on his worst days and you would help him no matter what was happening. 

He would do the same for you. 

He knew that you had your own personal struggle with your mental health and he admired the hell out of you for putting yourself on the fire every day when you didn’t know how he would react, you were a saint and angel and you deserved to be treated that way. He loved you and your relationship together was built on taking care of each other with as much love as you can. 

You had always helped him when he needed you. He would have night terrors and all sorts of fits when the storm settled. At first, he was the one that struggled the most. But, that did not last for long. You were struggling to put yourself back out there and even meeting with the RFA wore you down. It was obvious from the nervous glint in your eyes when the meetings were over. 

You never complained, but God, Saeran wished that you would. 

He doesn’t like to see you in pain. He left you alone for a few minutes and you wound up succumbing to your finicky feelings. Your breath haphazard and spots burning into the side of your vision. It was the usual amount of unease and you thought that it would subside, but it just got worse. Saeran came back to find you gasping and choking on your own tears. 

He was quick to your side, doing what you often did for him, helping you even out your breath so that you weren’t swallowing a few sips of oxygen to crawl into your lungs. Once he was sure that you had cleared the worst of that and could focus on everything else, he let you crawl into his arms. He would just talk to you, reminding you that he loved you and that he wasn’t going to go anywhere when you needed him. 

He loved you dearly, and he wasn’t bothered that he had to take care of you, he wanted to take care of you. He knows that you often feel guilt and let your feelings well up like this instead of talking to him but he reminds you that you’re going to have to work on this in the future. You don’t deserve to suffer in silence like this when he can help you.