#oops rant

simply put, it doesnt go anywhere. he grieves for a solid, like, day, and then safalin erases all his bad memories and he’s completely back to normal. sure, that ONE moment where he shows enough desperation to actually erase his own memories shows depth, but hes not given room to grieve. to grow.

its a luxury they gave reko in the route where alice dies; she refuses the memory erasure and we see her grieving over her brother but still pushing on despite it. now, im not saying that the only way to handle a grieving character is by having them stay strong; not at all. alice was clearly depressed about reko’s death and unable to move on from it, and he reacted differently to her death than she did to his because the way they feel about each other is different.

reko always wanted to avoid alice because hes a murderer. she felt resentment towards him because of what he did, yet still clearly cared about him. alice, on the other hand, felt guilt about how his crime affected reko’s life, wanting nothing more than to make her happy by pretending they werent related.

its not farfetched to say that alice felt reko deserved to live more than he did. that he went around wishing he died instead of her. (unsure if he actually says something of the sort, been a little while since i played the game) THIS is a good basis for a character arc, one that couldve been alice working past his guilt and learning to believe he deserved to survive.

but that isnt what we got. his potential for a developmental arc got completely kneecapped when safalin, at alice’s own request, deleted his painful memories of reko. we dont get to see him grieve. he simply says something along the lines of “its a tragedy she had to die, sure, but i feel fine.” and thats it. its done. no more mourning, no more change in alice’s demeanor, nothing.

Do you know what I’ve learned about fandom? That we can be so influenced by what we WANT to see on screen, that we don’t actually pay attention to what IS on screen.

But I mean, if I want to make up stories, I open up a document and WRITE A STORY, which I have complete control over. I don’t try to take control of someone ELSE’S story to say what is happening on screen isn’t happening because I say so.

If you’d see that look between your OTP and recognize it as romantic, then it is ALSO going to count as romantic when you see it between your NOTP, or you’re being a hypocrite, and biased, and ignoring what’s happening on screen. And if you do that, your interpretation is bad. (not you nonny, general ‘you.’)

I guess they don’t really want to be fair to the story and see what it’s saying, they want to force their OTP to be endgame… which doesn’t make any sense to me. How do you force someone else to tell your story? Just go tell your story. Write fanfic. Write something original. If you think it’s too hard to write stories and you can’t do it, then you should be giving more respect to the people who give you the stories that you love, even if it’s not the same as in your head, because it’s HARD to write good stories. So when someone tells you their story, you should be respectful and listen. And if you don’t like the story, you should be respectful and stop listening. Just go ahead and go.

Don’t listen to someone else’s story, tell them they’re doing it wrong, rewrite it to fit your fantasies, even though you aren’t skilled enough to write it yourself, and then say YOUR way is the only way to tell it.

That’s not how it works. It’s THEIR story. Not yours. You don’t have to like it, but it is not under your control.

sorry for the rant. I am a writer and a teacher of writing, and I believe that we should all tell our own stories. And that also means that no one should have a right to dictate what someone else’s story is. And I might focus my efforts on kids and new writers and indie writers, but it goes for professionals, too. None of us is forced to watch The 100, but if we do, we should remember that it is not OURS. We are the audience. We are the fans. We do not own the stories or the characters. It’s not our story.

Two days.

Two heckin days until it's a whole year old.

How. Okay. Um. I was technically aware of this. I remember specifically starting to post right at the end of last June because I didn't want to miss Pride month. But. Fuck. This ask made me check the date. So.

I wish I had anything clever or wise to say, but really, it's 1 am and I'm starting a new summer job tomorrow (AT A LIBRARY dsahfljksfhsadkljf HYPE) and my brain is just everywhere.

...I kind of thought I would've been done by now? But I'm really really not. I also naïvely thought I'd be able to keep posting weekly, because I had a draft doc of 22 chapters and a cheerful belief that I'd be able to wrap it up in at most 40-some (side-eyes current chapter count, draft doc, and story plan) and surely I'd be able to write the remaining chapters before the first twenty were posted. (Well...)

I also didn't expect to be, like, Talked About in random Discord servers and recced by random accounts and kudosed by handles I look up to. Or to have a little crew of readers who show up on every chapter to say awesome things. Or to get fucking... fanart and spin-off/'inspired-by' fics WHAT. ON. EARTH. So. That's been a Thing.

Or the comments that make me cry a bit and sort of shiver, because they're like, "this story gives me, a trans person, genuine hope for my future" or "I never thought about [love/relationships/gender/...] this way; I need to sit down" or "I was shite at maths in school yet here I am, understanding maths". Or the ones that praise the smutty scenes where something is awkward or goes wrong, or the ones that get excited about some random nerdy shit I go off about (Highland dress? Music theory?).

❤️

Time for uncle beardo to go to bed before he goes full Oscars acceptance speech

*2 minutes later* "WE WANT ANOTHER PREQUEL SHOW WITH THAT SUPER MANLY WHITE CAPTAIN AND IF YOU DON'T DO IT YOU'LL MAKE A GREAT MISTAKE!!"

imagine if all this energy was put to demand that a woc would take the chair with burnham as first science officier like it appeared to be the case in the promos before the show began and sweeps away that concept in the second episode

or

But please use tags people! I honestly can't be doing with seeing it pop up on my dash without warning. 

Especially considering the shit fest I expect for season 7. I mean, it's not even just how much I dislike mcroll, that's not even top of my list any more of what I don't like about the show. I hate how shit they are to Danny, that one is number 1 with a bullet. I hate that Steve is a prick, I hate that we lost characters for no reason, I hate that Steve has had no storyline for a year and a half, I hate that Lou only gets 1 allotted episode per season, that Kono and Adam can't be happy... hell, Danny will be all but gone entirely. (which is fine. Scott doesn’t need this show, he’s going to be successful no matter what, unlike other actors he actually has talent and can survive... hell, the majority of the main cast would have a new thing tomorrow given their talent and Scott would be happier and better off without five-0 in his life)

Look, my worst case scenario is simple. Catherine returns in 7x01 on a full season contract. Lynn is conveniently forgotten, everyone welcomes Cath with open arms and not a single question over her having left. She nurses Steve back to health then he asks her to marry him and says he wants babies because of the whole 'legacy' thing. Chin and Abby will mirror that story by getting married and adopting Sarah. Kono and Adam finally get some happiness... they decide to have a kid. Lou gets 1 single episode again. Danny is barely there and only ever argues with Steve about a case, he loses every argument. At the end of the day, ‘legacy’ will mean about having babies and keeping the family line going when it should only be PARTLY about that and partly about other influences your life can have hence why I will hate it. Especially since we should have a season of Steve’s PTSD and feelings over near-death like I said before about those combining and him hesitating and needing genuine psychological help. 

My brain is fine with all of its expectations. Lenkov is clear in what he wants and it’s not what I want in the slightest hence why I don’t want to see it.. And, let's be honest, my brain thinking all this isn't out with the realm of possibility of it happening. I'd prefer that my brain be allowed to think this and lay everything to rest. Frankly, it's also possible Lenkov can come up with something even worse. I have no faith in anything being actually ‘better’. 

So please, tag your shit. I don't want to have to unfollow a load of people and empty out my feed, because as much as I unfollowed dedicated h50/mcdanno blogs, there are plenty of people I follow who are multi fandom and post all sorts of other things I do want to see... like Lucifer for example.