#one sided bartylus

barty - augustine

regulus - james

james - betty

~*~*~*~*~*~

~*Dorcas Meadows*~

Dorcas never thought that she would live a life without her friends. Those boys. Those boys who always accompanied her everywhere, those boys who never dared to disappoint her, those boys who pranked with her, who danced with her, who shared the best memories with her. The boys who betrayed her, and broke their promise.

But it was fine! It was absolutely fine, because she still had Pandora, and those boys were bad people. They will kill, they will murder, and they will commit crimes. Dorcas is better off without them.

In all honesty, Cas isn’t so sure about that.

It’s been so lonely without them, so depressing. Dorcas doesn’t feel like herself. She feels hollow, in despair, in heartbreak. She misses the comforting laughter of her friends during dark nights in the common room, watching the giant squid glide by the windows. She misses the feeling of rare and meaningful hugs. She misses her boys. Her precious siblings, destined for doom at the end.

Regulus, cold complexion but a warm heart, harsh glares but soft smiles, heated words accompanied by the warmest hands. Regulus, who would find asking for help embarrassing. Regulus, who scolded all of them but laughed behind the scenes. Regulus, who nearly cried alongside the tears of one of his fellow friends. Regulus, who acted so tough, when he was not–just in case Sirius was watching.

Barty, big smiles and small ounces of shame, cold hands but warm greetings, annoying snores with comforting touches. Clingy, but shameless. Loving, but secretive. Dorcas wishes more people could’ve gotten to know him. The best side of him. She wishes they could just understand where they came from, their backgrounds. But no, they judge. They judge without reading the words in the book. They judge by the printed cover.

Remembering the way Barty’s gaze would change whenever Evan stepped into the room was bittersweet. Their soft smiles, soft slide of skin-on-skin, warm hugs and softly spoken words. It filled Dorcas up with love, this new thing between them. She wasn’t used to it, but she knew they needed it. She wonders if they’re still alive. She shouldn’t think about them too much, but she can’t help herself.

And there was Evan. Soft chuckles and loud gazes, quiet nods and hums yet his presence was so there, she didn’t know how to explain him. He was different, carried a different aura, a different energy. All she knew for sure was that if they were straight, she would’ve fallen for him. Flawless skin, perfect teeth, pale glowy skin, slim figure, thin hands, soft locks, deep voices and fragile giggles. She knew why Barty loved him. How couldn’t you?

Dorcas cocooned into the corner of the room, gazing out the window and at Regulus’ star. I miss him the most, I think. She thought to herself. I love them all the same, but I miss him. She didn’t know why, well–she did, but she didn’t know why this sudden feeling of want took over her heart. She closed her eyes, the bright blinking of the star flashing behind her lids.

There came a soft clacking noise from nearby and she cracked open an eye, leaning off the wall in surprise when seeing Regulus’ owl. She stood, walking towards the bird and peering into its wet eyes. She shouldn’t grab the letter. She shouldn’t read it, it’s for the best. She’s gotten enough letters from Barty and enough letters from Evan (a handful, which is quite much coming from Ev), and one single letter from Reg, including this one. Normally, she would’ve ignored the owl like any sane person, but before she could process, the letter was in her hand and the owl long gone over the horizon. She looked up, and Regulus’ star was dim. She furrowed her brows, fiddling with the bent corners of the thick envelope. The star should be the brightest today.

Gulping, she pulled herself away from the window, sitting back down in her tiny corner and glaring unblinkingly at the letter. Laughter at Barty’s jokes, smiles when sharing a knowing glance, hugs when upset, cheering at quidditch, giggles when Potter would stare at him, drama about Lupin being a supposed ‘werewolf’, books being traded between them both, reading quietly in the library while Barty and Evan disrupted peace across the room accompanied with Pandora’s lectures, teasing with crude and dark jokes, memories. Many of them.

She plucked open the poorly stamped wax, her fingers shaking like petals in wind. She tugged out the thickly folded letter delicately, brows scrunched when a separate sheet of paper slipped from between the cracks of the hastendly written letter. She placed that aside, and began to unfold the scrunched up message.

She cleared her throat, blinking with dry eyes, and she read.

______________________

08/01/79

Dear older sister,

If you have received this letter, I am dead. I have told Kreacher to send out all of my letters if I don’t make it back. In all honesty, I always knew I wouldn’t make it back, but I foolishly kept my hopes up. I kept my hopes up that if I went on just a day longer, things would change. But they didn’t. To make sure you read this letter, I have sent an owl to accompany it and bring it to the receiver.

I’m sorry to surprise you like this, especially when we aren’t close like we used to be anymore. I wanted to leave this world knowing the latest memories you have of me are good ones. I know you knew something was wrong with me, and you were right. You always know when something is wrong, and I love you for it.

I hope you never forget me and who I was. I hope when you hear anyone (my brother) speak badly about me you will roll your eyes and defend me. I know you would either way, but it is my wish for you.

Actually, I have a different wish for you when I die. Whenever you stumble upon Barty, Evan, even James, Remus, Lily, and Sirius, show them respect. I want the people I love showcasing love for each other. Even if you must force it.

I promise you, I will be waiting for you all after death. I promise I’ll be here. There is no point anyway in denying everything, I already know I’ll be dead. Don’t ask how, or why I know.

Do not tell anyone what I am about to tell you, but I know how Evan and Barty will die. Someone has told me, but I won’t say names. Spend as much time with them as you can, or at least see them as much as you can. Be strong, nothing will end easy.

I wrote another letter alongside this one. You and Pandora are the only ones who’ve got one. It’s a plan for both of you, just know there is a risk of death.

Maybe in another life we’ll all be able to grow old together as a close group of friends. Inseparable. Maybe in another life things won’t end this way and we could’ve gotten to know each other as much as we could. I face death with the hope that you will all live long and healthy lives, and if not, I fill myself with yet another foolish hope that when we all die, we’ll be reunited.

Remember our friendship, and control your anger.

R.A.B.

______________________

Dorcas shut her eyes tightly, hot tears racing down her chocolate cheeks. She rose up from the floor, knees weak, and she stared upon the star once more. It was dimmer. Fading. But it was still flickering with its remaining energy. He’s not dead, she thought, feeling her heart sink lower down into the trenches of her gut, he’s dying.

She didn’t allow herself to cry. She picked up the other letter, quickly reading the words, Horcrux, spell, potion, death, the dark lord being the only things she understood.

“Panda.” She gasped, clutching both letters and storming out of the room and down the hallway, rapidly clasping onto her bag and rushing to the fireplace. She picked up the floo, and threw it down with an exasperated call of her best friend's location.

Hogsmeade with her friends, Regulus’ swatting hands, Barty’s hyena cackles, Evan’s twinkling eyes, Pandora’s flower crown. Christmas break, Regulus’ eyes filled with dread, Barty pacing the room, Evan sobbing with the mark on his arm, and Pandora nowhere to be seen.

Year 4, Regulus’ transition, Barty’s intrigued stares, Evan’s proud eyes, and Pandora’s knowing smirk. Sirius running away, Regulus’ desperate wails for his brother, Barty’s screaming in fury, Evan’s throbbing headache and pacing, and Pandora’s comforting back rubs.

She landed, nausea stars clouding the corners of her vision. “Panda,” She wailed, collapsing her weight against the door. “Pandora!” she wailed with a scream, scratching the wooden door of the Lovegood residence. Finally, the door opened. And there she was, eyebags and chapped lips.

“Dorcas?”

2 years later, Dorcas Meadows didn’t control her anger after Marlene’s death.

Unrequited Bartylus is just so precious to me for some reason.

Barty thinks Regulus loves him the same way he loves Regulus. But Regulus doesn't realise Barty likes him in that way, he thinks it's a friends with benefits situation without any feelings involved... So one day when he goes to his dorm to tell Barty, his best friend, about James Potter and how he thinks he's falling for Jamie, he doesn't quiet understand why Barty looks like he's going to breakdown.

Barty thought it was more than just a quick fuck between two friends. So hearing about James Potter broke him. He knew it showed on his face so he covered it up quickly and teased Regulus, before making some two-bit exuse and running Dorcas' dorm- she always helps...