#nrclutter

If the insecurity is not so common then sure, I can see it, but if the reader was insecure from the start and it continues to do so, then no, I can't see it at all. The comfort Vil would give wouldn't be the "Mom Mode" that everyone slots him in, it would be kinda on the harsh side to be quite honest, cause Vil is the kind of person that delivers what he feel to be the truth upfront rather than trying to put it in a sugarcoated package.

Meaning, if the insecurity pops up, he'd likely try and point out the source of the discomfort and try and give ways to get at the root of the problem rather than just saying sweet words and gifts and all that. Vil's pretty much a man of action with a sharp eye to boot. Simply put, the comfort would not come right away, so to the person who's feeling insecure, it will seem as though he does not care for them, because insecurity is nasty in that nature. Because one's own self-worth is so low, it makes it real easy to believe that if you don't get nice things, it's because you don't deserve it rather than it's because the nice things will come later.

Get the blood moving, take up a new hobby, refresh the closet, spoil yourself in the shower. Essentially, Vil is going to introduce things the reader can do by themselves along side some of his own spoiling. Keep in mind, he's doing all this with the mindset that the reader can and will help themselves rather than Vil trying to do all the work for them. I suppose that's what usually bothers me the most about asks that requests a super insecure reader, cause usually they want the "cute" side of insecurity that ends with super fluffy comfort without wanting to think of the consequences that can and will come. And I get that. Nobody wants to think about how insidious insecurity can get cause it delves too close to reality and nobody likes that.

But there's a comfort in exploring that side of insecurity cause, often times, it leads to many a decaying or cutting of friendships or relationships. When one is so deep in their insecurity, it becomes easy to believe they're helpless, but they don't want to be, they really don't want to be helpless, but they also believe themselves to be so useless and dumb and not good for anything that any help they try to do will lead to more hurt. Lead to confirmations that yeah, those things you did to help yourself? Didn't do shit cause you can't help yourself. Why did you believe you can do anything?

So when one gets some comfort that has no strings attached, it leads to this unique euphoria that's easy to get addicted to. It feels good, for the first few times, but then the brain forgets and starts to doubt and the effects of those words expire. So, they gotta hear them again. And again. And again. And if they start retracting? The brain hits the red alarm button and starts thinking of all the worst outcomes known to man. Spiraling into another, worst cesspool cause now they have to deal with the withdrawls. Only makes their own self image worse cause they asked for too much, they're too needy, they shouldn't have said anything. Shouldn't have said a word.

And when everyone turns their back to then, letting go of the hand that's gone necrotic with how gripping their own fingers were, they look outside and go "I think I'll spoil myself today. I don't deserve it, but that's okay. I'll feel like I'll do one day."

See, I don't really answer to any super insecure reader with Vil, or any character in general, cause I would not do the topic justice in just a single drabble. Along with the fact that I wouldn't make it a pretty fluffy piece either cause I don't like to write the watered down version of insecurity. That and Vil will not help an insecure reader that will not take the steps to help themselves. He will not hold their hand, he will not mother them until after the steps have been taken. Cause Vil does not mess around when it comes to that.

Honestly have a hard time seeing him with anyone that has self-image issues. And, if this insecure reader refuses to take any of the olive branches, he can and will leave them even if it will leave them an emotional wreck. It's because Vil knows of his limits that he will break up with them. He can't be in a relationship of equals if one party looks to him as their savior, as their sole reason for having any confidence at all. And, as such, the reader would suffer tremendously as a result.

Setting aside the obvious ones(Rook, Cater, Jade, Lilia) there are those secretly want it but aren't aware of it(Deuce, Epel, Trey, Riddle), those who just want to be grabbed by the collar and annoy the Janitor for their attention(Leona, Vil, Floyd, Malleus), and those who are in denial of it despite their fantasies(Azul, Ace, Sebek, Jack)

Idia is too chicken to ask. Ruggie more feels the need to run when grabbed by the collar, and Silver just doesn't get it. Kalim would ask for the fun of it.

To Vil, there is no such thing as a person born ugly. You are made ugly, by your own hand, by your own lack of care and recklessness.

Many of these lines I have are usually associated with the Eldritch AU, just cause I want that AU to have my best efforts.

Fire. A tall wall of blue flame, stoked up high as the trees planted around them. They enclosed you inside with the ink monster that had aided him since the start. “Of course. I feel invincible in this silent world. “See, exhaustion is a very human thing, and many creatures in my world fail to replicate it, especially when they’re singing. “For some reason, a lot of the monster’s I’ve encountered are usually tone deaf.”

Like, I have lots of them, it's kinda hilarious.

"so, for an impatient one like you, who wanted to pry into all my little secrets well before I would be willing to give them,“ you snapped the papers sharply against your palm, ”these precious treasures will forever be lost to you. “I would have, had you bothered to ask,” and yet, Azul didn’t. …Nothing more than simple paranoia. Not caution, not deliberating one’s actions, paranoia. He assumed the worst out of someone who barely arrived, however… “Y-you can hardly blame me for thinking such things when you consider just how many mysteries surround you. I had to practice caution, lest I let myself be exposed.” “What an odd way you show that caution of yours, Azul Ashengrotto. You were wary of me, that much I was certain, but you were more concerned in how you could possibly have me under you.”

The thing about me is the fact that I'm actually pretty good at writing dialogue, but I usually end up opting for little to none, cause it makes my drabbles too long. Beyond playing RPG's, I also play a fuckton of visual novels in my free time, so my writing has been influenced as such.

“Azul,” you relaxed back against the chair in the newly repaired lounge, “you started this game. You should have known better than to arouse my curiosity.” Stare into the abyss long enough and it shall stare back at you. And what are shadows to do but to hunt the light within your eyes? “Caution dictated that you would poke and prod to see what my role within all these strange happenings is. I can’t say I blame you for doing such a thing. But, you hold no respect towards me. You wanted me to be another tool, another link upon the chain you’ve built to seal away the vault of your weaknesses. And what am I to do, but to open that vault?”

Lot of them is just Eldritch Prefect honestly, though not all of them.

"Magic depends on imagination, and a lot of the time you can't imagine shit when you're panicking."

That line is said by the Janitor Prefect. Don't know the context for that one, I was just trying to get their voice right in my head. Sorta tired, sorta grumpy, but ultimately very knowledgeable on a lot of different subjects.

"'It can't be helped.' I've been told those words many, many times. 'This is just the way things are, you have to understand it. It cannot be stopped. It be like trying to stop the currents, to turn the sands into snow.' From childhood to even now, I've always been told this, but I knew what they were saying. 'Give up on your brother. On your family. You can't reverse your mistake.'"

As soon as I get around to finishing my current event, I think I'm going to be doing Valenio next. No choices to be made with this one, just a straight line of a story, but a story nonetheless.

So, say there's a character that you know is feeling happy because they're going to the carnival. You don't say, "She's jumped around happily," you say, "There's a spring to her step, as though she's about to jump on the nearest counter as she bobbed up and down." You kinda have to walk around the exact emotion via figuring out what actions they use to express themselves when they're feeling a certain way.. This rule is specifically for if you want to linger just the slightest bit longer on a character's state of emotion. If it's an action scene or you're trying to quickly get from plot point A to plot point B, then you can go on ahead with doing that.

Whenever I'm writing, I also sort of imagine myself as this 'ghost' in the scene, right behind the shoulders of my audience. My ghost self is floating in the air, knowing what's going to unfold but you don't, so I tell it to you all the while just, chilling there. I have no worries because I know how it's going to all end.

Whenever there's an opportunity for people to read out loud, often I'm the one that everyone else chooses because they love the sound of my voice. Because of that, I end up noticing a certain "flow" to paragraphs. Some books are clumsier than others in their word flow and others are silky smooth. It's not something I can give a definitive set of rules to, it's something you have to learn on your own. So, when you can, read my stuff out loud to yourself, then read your own stuff out loud.

Another thing that I do that helps me with writing is to find a book or fanfiction that has that writing style I like. I have a small collection at the ready but I'm not going to share it because, uh, yeah they're dark. I don't pick the fic or book apart actually, I just read through it, take in the mood it gives me and just, write my stuff out.

There's this exercise I used to do before I got bored of it was basically slowly focusing in on an object. You describe the outside, then you focus in on a neighborhood, then you focus on a house, then a section of the house, then a room and finally an object. A slow zooming in, you're walking or floating there. You can also do the opposite of slowly focusing out. I find that it has helped me with figuring out how to set the speed in a story. I don't like being too quick, because I don't like my stuff to feel too fleeting.

Oh and have a document or notepad at the ready dedicated for just, blabber stuff. When there's too much noise in my head and I really want to write, I end up typing down my barest, baaaaarest attempt at a story. It's entirely missing in context, little description, and just not good stuff. But it's stuff I have to scrape out of my head. And they have no pattern. Sometimes it's 2nd POV stuff, and then it hard cuts to mutterings like "alright, there stuff in my head and there's noise and ho boy is everything too clouded for me. Could go for a sweet drink but I don't want to get up or do anything honestly but if I don't write I'll never will and there's no way I'm losing my passion for writing again." So, rambles. Yeah have a note or something dedicated to rambles before you start writing, especially if you're the kind that gets this "head noise" like I do. Just, the static fuzzes right up in the brain. And even if you still can't come up with anything after all that, then you're good, because you wrote something. In a stream of consciousness kind of way. Which is also another writing style.

Well, Ace is not a smooth bitch, let's be perfectly honest. When it comes to just, flirting and getting a date so he doesn't seem like a loser, yeah Ace can manage but if he's actually into the person? Yeah no, man's a total loser. He's gonna stutter, he's gonna be a brat and say shit like "Oh so you're into me?" all the while he's shaking like a fucking chihuahua and is red in the face. His pride won't let him admit that he's into you, so it's gonna be a funny, if somewhat irritating, time.

Deuce is almost the same, but he's long since shed off most of that pride Ace has in order to be more honest about himself and his feelings. Unlike Ace, his honesty would be his best charm, though Deuce doesn't know that. Flirting attempts are pretty basic though, when he tries to flirt that is. Probably tries to style his hair but ends up with a weird, obviously not natural look.

Cater, well, after coming to terms that he really want to date someone, he actually starts spending more quiet moments with them. Just, sitting in silence and enjoying what he can, cause emotional intimacy is something hard to initiate, especially since his flirting is going to have some of his real heartfelt emotions into it, so that's gonna be a hard thing for him to do unless he fully accepts that he's into someone.

Trey is pretty simple actually. Baking is his language so gifts are abound. Though, he'd probably ask for you to bake with him and might start some classic baking shenanigans, such as frosting on the nose or sprinkling some flour on your shoulder. Basically, the man wants you to prank him. Just, play around and have fun.

Riddle...oh boy...poor little man. He doesn't know what to do! It actually takes him a while for him to notice that he has a crush at all. He's just filled with giddy feeling and confuses it for very deep admiration, so he puts his efforts into getting more knowledge, perfecting his perfect grades and even making study guides so that you both can use. When it hits him, he's gonna be a stuttering mess.

Floyd, it would be hard to pin down if he's flirting or not. His way of flirting almost borders on threatening, but by this point in the friendship, one can tell if he's actually threatening or if he's kidding. "I'm gonna bother ya for the rest of your life!" Kind of thing. Either way, his mood swings make it hard to tell the depths of his feelings as he always expresses them a different way. He has an odd way of guarding his heart, making sure that he's both overexpressive and not just so people don't think too much about the weight of his words and how they mean in his heart.

Jade is another one that guards his heart pretty closely, though he does show his affection as acts of service. Doing you little favors but will ask for you to do something small for him. The indicator that he's feeling something for you is in what favors he's actually asking. Basically, asking you to study with him, or guide him around campus. Puts himself in positions where he seemingly needs help, but he actually doesn't. Just so you can spend time with him.

And Azul. Yeah this fucker is going to try for the whole "Oh look at me and how smooth I am. Look and how well put together I am as I shower you with gifts," but if you so much as accidentally touch his hand, he's short circuiting. The best way to catch him off guard though, is to play into this little act of his, pretend that you're actually being swooned by him only to hit him with some brutal and sincere honestly like, "The way you fiddle with your glasses is adorable, Azul."

Leona walks to the beat of his own drum to be perfectly honest, so while to the public, it be difficult to see who he's into, to those that know him, it's actually rather obvious. He's not really a smooth casanova, doesn't really adjust his attitude when around the person he likes, if anything he becomes even more of an annoyance cause that's easier than trying to be all mushy. So yeah, Leona does not have a seduction technique. The biggest indicator would definitely have to be how touchy he is. As in, when you're sitting down on a bench, instead of Leona taking a free spot, he just scoots into what little space is left, letting his back touch yours. Then he starts complaining about his day with a sigh.

Ruggie is an easy one. Gets real chatty around you, and starts giving you little snacks here and there, usually at a specific time, every day just so you expect him there. Will definitely have you do chores with him though, cause that means he gets to spend more time with you and he gets to have some of the workload taken off of him. Can honestly see him as the type to do both obvious favors and secretive ones. Like, if he notices that you're running out of pens or pencils, he'll just drop one in your bag. Has a weird definition of what little favors are embarrassing or not.

Jack. Jack Jack Jack boy. He's probably slot himself by your side, walking with you every step of the way and trying to take care of as many things as you're willing to give him. When he gets excited about things, his first thought is to share that happiness with you. While he still keeps to his schedule, he does try and find little pockets in time where he can be near you. The most obvious indicator would have to be his tail, but also the way he latches onto your every word. If you make a comment on how hot today is, Jack will be conscious of the weather for the rest of the week and even have cold drinks at the ready when he notes the day being particularly hot.

Vil is an interesting one. While he is honest about himself, he tends to be a little tricky? I don't know how to put it but he doesn't pursue his feelings right away. Usually he lets them linger, as though to make sure that what he's feeling isn't some facsimile or a temporary flight of emotion. On a subconscious level, he sort of lingers around your presence more. If there's a situation where he has to put a hand on your back to guide you, it actually takes longer for his hand to come off. He genuinely forgets. Essentially, Vil's focus on his every mannerism tends to fuzz a bit, so he seems less graceful than usual and more just, casual, like one does when you're at some resort or relaxing at home. Once it hits him that these feelings are here to stay, that's when he's blunt and upfront about it. He makes his feelings known, but he doesn't ask you out on a date. What he does is ask that you watch him, witness him at his every moment, at his peak and at his lowest, and then decide if you want to give him a chance.

Rook's pretty open about what he loves and what he doesn't, so much so that it's difficult to gauge if he's truly serious or if it's simply another part of his love for life and the beauty within it. But, that being said, while energy and dramatic way of expressing himself doesn't change, he does have a new added behavior where he and the person of his affection will just, drift off into their own little world, sharing calm and quiet conversations as though the both of you are alone in a rose garden. Rook is pretty upfront of his affection and will probably go out of his way to leave little traces of himself via gifts in your daily locations, such as your kitchen, your desk, your couch. Just, anywhere. Sometimes he'll even forget he's supposed to be comprehending your words cause he's just in love with the intonation of your voice.

He's like a kid brother that you have to take care of, that you have to reign in when he becomes too reckless. I can see why people would love that about Grim, but half the time I find that people tend to ignore the responsibility that would come with Grim, cause the game does establish the fact that the main character and Grim are not equals, whether that's intentional or not. Sure, you're both in the same situation where you don't know what the shit is going on, but the game makes constant reminders that he's "your problem" to take care of. He runs off, you have to catch him. He makes trouble, you have to guide him. He can't pay attention, you have to make notes for him. Don't do any of that? Yeah, you're getting kicked out of NRC.

I'm taking this too seriously, I know, but these glaring burdens that are thrust upon the main character, I can't ignore it at all.

Again, not an equal. And, as someone who severely loves their alone time and doesn't want kids period, I cannot ever write the Reader as a smothering figure who has the patience to deal with his tantrums or bend over backwards just to keep him placated. Grim and the Reader have one thing in common and that's about it. If he wants to skip class, my prideful self would leave him there and go to class by myself.

All this? Tis potential to me. I would've loved to see this explored honestly. Would've loved to see the main character and Grim just, not getting along cause they both don't see each other as equals. But nope, the focus is on the boys, not Grim and the main character cause they're not as important.

But yeah, don't get me wrong, I don't hate Grim, I just don't like how a lot of the narrative and the fanfictions I occasionally go to coddle and coo over Grim like he's a baby, when we all know Grim would fucking bite you if he thinks you're looking down on him. To the flames you go! He's a fucking brat, but people just, kind of forget or downplay it cause he's cute? Oh well, all of you know I'm not going to do that.

And not talking about your home? Yeah that's actually a thing I do, mostly cause I can't see anything interesting that would be nice to talk about. My days are pretty boring all things considered, and the only things that stick to my head is my various amounts of trauma but you have to be close to me to find out about all those details.