#nonbinary and disabled

I don't recognize a lot of social cues, or whenever someone is treating me badly until it's already happening.

It took me literal months to realize that my kindness was being taken advantage of, and I was being mistreated. Because my roommate's fiancé literally does not care about his home. Doesn't mind living in a mess, or that I'm pushing myself to keep things clean.

He really just prefers to play video games all day and avoid responsibility.

Which frustrates me. I'm disabled, have issues with breathing, and am unable to live in filth. Things have to be cleaned and organized, or I get overwhelmed.

I've been questioning so many things lately and struggling to go over everything that's happened in the 11 months. My other roommate is severely pissed on my behalf and went off on my roommate's fiancé this weekend.

Everything came to light, and he really doesn't care/mind living in disgusting conditions. Prefers to just do things whenever he wishes/wants to.

...didn't care that I was upset and in the bathroom hiding because I cannot handle yelling. I was struggling to keep myself calm.

All while he was yelling, and talking over my other roommate.

It's that time again...

"Stick and Poke" Monday. A day that helps me get my weekly dose of hormones and serotonin.

Being trans, disabled, and chronically ill - it's a hurdle to get to sleep on time and be able to wake for my injection.

Thankfully, I had someone kind enough to wake me and ask "Do you want to sleep the rest of the day, or be awake?"

In my half-asleep, pain-induced state I remembered what today was and forced myself to climb out of bed. Walked my puppy and had enough spoons to make my Huel shake ( meal replacement, since I have anemia and am on the spectrum, food sensitivities suck ) and coffee.

...then quickly and carefully did my shot.

Woke up around midnight, and I've been up ever since. Taking care of packing, chores and working out a bit - still not 💯 at full health. But I'm not about to let that stop me from accomplishing my goals.

GRAAAAHHHHHH!

I have some writing and working on my art to do today. Things will be fine tuned and I won't let my mind distract me.

Really proud of my workout progress.

I picked up two boxes of cereal and a jug of milk. Why is am suddenly wanting to go ham on that box? Is it the hormones that are making me hungry af?

The man juice needing more than one or two small meals? I can easily clear out half a kitchen now, and even then I'm still hungry. I'm burning off so much energy and sleeping a hell of a lot more than what I'm used to.

...really should have done my homework on hormones before taking them. But I guess a crash course is easier for me to learn things. I learn in weird af ways.

Don't you judge me.

Why the fuck do I want bananas now too? What...even..

I don't even like bananas! Too squishy.

Being disabled and neurodivergent makes burning off the energy that much more difficult, because if I get too overwhelmed or have a flare-up - it puts me at risk of shutting down and not wanting to do anything.

...once again my prescription is being fucked with. ( My testosterone; which I take one shot every week.) This is the same woman that keeps fucking it up.

While I may be covered in piercings and have a tattoo, I really am not fond of shots. But, I picked the once-a-week shot so I could do it once and be done with it.

However, every. single. week. there is some issue at this CVS and it's the SAME woman that messes it up.

So, finally being tired with it, I put my shot on a renewal prescription. Ensuring that the only thing I would have to do is put in my script number and the phone number of the Pharmacy to let them know I'd need a refill.

I called twice this week,...

...and sent two messages to ENSURE that I would be presented with no issues. All was well..or so I thought.

I got the message that I could pick my scrip up today at noon and I was set to. Took a nap, due to a flare-up and cramps. HOWEVER...

...when I woke up, I was informed that the scrip THAT THEY HAD A WEEK TO FILL. OR CALL ME. AT ANY FUCKING POINT...WAS STILL IN PROCESSING.

Proceeded to put me on hold, and then when she finally picked up the phone, took an attitude with me.

I reminded her that my shot is tomorrow, and I cannot miss it. It's hormone replacement therapy. HORMONE REPLACEMENT that I do once a week.

She took a tone with me..

"It'll be ready in two hours, SIR."

The literal amount of frustration and rage I felt. I swallowed down and explained that this keeps happening. Even though I put my renewal order in, and do my best to give them a weeks time to handle this...it keeps happening.

She took a tone, and told me it'd be ready in two hours. Cut me off, and then hung up.