#nodiary

(The Family Dinner Chronicles)

 As working parents, it’s a rare evening when me, my wife and two children (5 and 16 years of age respectively) get to sit down together at our dining table for a family dinner; home cooked at that!  This is the case even more so now since I adopted a vegan lifestyle last September.  I prepare my own meals so the timing is obviously off for family dining when my wife is able to cook or brings home something from an “outside vendor”. Outside vendor is a handy euphemism I use for greasy, fatty fast food, but I digress…

In any case, this particular day my wife called me at the office and informed me that she planned to cook a chicken dish and the side would be roasted potatoes.  I have always enjoyed her tasty roasted potatoes. They have the right amount of firmness I prefer but yet a tender core, plus they’re not oily or salty. She seasons them expertly so I agreed that would be my main course and I would just sauté some onions and peppers separately to go along with it. Onions and peppers don’t take long to cook so I figured this would all work out perfectly.  We were ALL set for family dinner time…as so I thought.

Just to give you a little background.  The day was a typical steamy, hot and humid New York City day in the summer. Also, we have no air conditioning in the kitchen/dining area so a hot stove would only make the heat more oppressive.  However, my wife’s dedication to the family overrode her impending uncomfortableness in the kitchen. She opened up the windows to the maximum and started grinding away with the meal preparation.

Fast forward to later in the evening, my wife was putting the final seasoning touches on the chicken drum sticks.  My onions and peppers were already prepared. I was looking very forward to pouring them over some delicious roasted potatoes, then a pint sized squeaky voice assertively blurts out, “I don’t want to eat chicken! Just give me some potatoes and ketchup!”

As many are aware, the dining tastes of children are so inconsistent and fickle, it can drive the most patient of persons up a wall.  They love something today and tomorrow, it’s supposedly disgusting and ewwww lol.  In this instance, my 5 year old daughter had eaten a similar chicken dish just last week so I was pretty confident my wife would not see eye to eye with her sudden change of heart and likewise, my daughter had no concept at this young age that mommy had put in a tremendous effort through the sweltering heat to provide her a home cooked meal. 

A quiet tension overwhelmed the kitchen-dining area as we all anticipated my wife’s response.  My heart was fluttering….but not for the reason one would expect.  As a vegan, I frankly could barely contain my excitement inside wondering, “Wow, has my 5 year old daughter fully transformed into veganism?!?” She always claims she’s vegan to other people lol, however, I know a lot of that comes from children naturally wanting to emulate their parents’ lifestyles.  She enjoys many of the vegan items I have her try, but she’s only five; just coming into her own, developing her own tastes and dietary boundaries.  She loves foods like eggs, bacon, baked goods, pizza etc.…all of which I’ve managed to introduce the vegan alternatives to her, however, obviously, my wife being non-vegan, she’s going to provide these foods to her without any regard of a vegan version.

Anyway, back to the dark cloud hovering over dinner time.  I looked away because I had a feeling my wife was about to explode.  My son began slowly inching back to his bedroom. As I’m looking away anticipating the worst, in the corner of my eye I can see the innocent glaze of my daughter, just waiting for a response to her request.  A few more seconds passed in what felt to be an eternity, and then I worked up the confidence to break the ice…….

 I countered with a wry smile, “You don’t have to eat the chicken if you don’t want to honey. The potatoes will fill you up just fine.” That statement was one big step in the case of veganism for my developing child……one horrible huge misstep in my marriage.  

 In my fervor to promote veganism and a more nutritious diet, I had essentially overrode my wife’s parental authority and subtly disregarded her effort in making the meal. I won’t get into the messy details of the aftermath of my bold statement.  Let’s just say the end result was not good for my daughter or myself lol. Was there a better way I could have handled the situation? I’m still unsure.  I’m curious to know other vegan’s experiences with non-vegan partners when it comes to the nutrition and diet of their children. How do they manage the inherent conflict at times?