#nightmere

Hot air was against his skin and his hands were pulled in an uncomfortable way, except for that Tim could feel anything. His tongue was heavy in his mouth and all he could taste was iron and he couldn't feel his legs. His head hurt and he was struggling against the drugs in his body. He was fighting to open his eyes but they felt like they wegihed at least a millions tons at the moment.

He tried to make his eyes open by thinking about awful things but it didn't helped, the opposite actully, every thought that run in his mind made his eyes screw more. So he let himself relax. It was hard but he has to, it could be the thing that will make his eyes open so he would be able to look at his sourrondering.

And that's what he did for the next 15 minutes. His head hurt less and he started to feel his legs again but his hands still were in an uncomfortable and he still tasted only iron in his mouth and then he found out that his sense of smell didn't exactly worked and now it dose.And that was what made his eyes open wide and he almost puked.

The strong, disgusting smell of pee made him open his eyes and almost empty everything in his stomach.

He tried to breathe only from his mouth while he looked around.

Everything was dark so Tim waited until his eyes Get used to the darkness and when they did he was in some kind of basement, he still had his suite on, his hands were tie above his head and he was on a ruined mattress. Next to him was a sleeping guy with brown hair and he was in a suite.

'It's Shawn Stefan.' said the voice in his mind. And made Tim think about what the hell happened.

He remmbers the meeting. It went kind of well, Shawn was diffrent from his father, he knew that: "No" dosen't mean: "Yes, I will tell you about what we are working on right now in WE even if that's secret right now." Which is a really nice thing.

So they talked a bit and when they were about to leave... That's when everything start to get fogging in his mind but he could guess what happend: They got drugged and kidnapped.

And the kidnappers were nowhere. At least nowere Tim could see.

He looked up at the ropes around his hands and he knew that he could run away at any second but: 1. He isn't red robin now, he's Tim Drake-Wayne (Even through he dropped the Wayne name long time ago.) and 2. He would have to help Shawn as well. But he can't trust the bats to come for him. And superboy or kid flash can't come to Gotham just to save him. But maybe the bats will come to save Shawn. And then Tim would have to explan how he got himself kidnap and he already heared Damian's voice in his head' Insulting him for getting kidnap, something he didn't even had control on.

He closed his eyes and slowed his breath, wishing it would dim the horrible smell a bit.

He tried to think about everything but his mind always run back to the first time he was kidnapped.

He was seven years old then and his mom was so disappointed in him. Although it took him couple of years to understand that she wasn't upset with the fact that he was kidnapped but by the fact that he let that happen. Which was a horrible thing but he expected that. After all he was what she called: "A rotten child" and he got that. He still think he is rotten, not as much as in his childhood but enough to make his so called family hate him and replace him without thinking about it.

He understood that. He isn't good enough to be one of them. He is the stand in and the replacement and the pretender. They expect from him love but he can't expect it back. He did it once and he can't do it again. It was a really big mistake to think that he would be part of their family.

'Okay brain. Stop that. I need to think about good things' He scolded himself and started think about his friends.

Coffee.

Taking photos.

Dogs and cats.

Memes that's Kon and Bart sending him.

Dick and Jason.

The titans.

Wait. Wait. Dick and Jason? Tim does love them but why the hell did he listed them in the good things? They did a lot of things to hurt him.

'From the other universe dumbass' The voice inside his head said and he agreed. Those guys were really nice and he wishes he could see them one more time.

Stuck inside his mind, running memories and good things that happened to him in his life, madw Tim slowly drift to sleep.

He was sitting on the top of a building he didn't recognize.

The sun was right in the middle of the sky even though they were in a black-blue shade. The wind waved his hair away from his face and made it fly wildly over his scalp.

Next to him was his thermos, full with hot coffee. He smiled as he took a long sip and hummed with the sudden song that filled his head, Tim closed his eyes and breathe in the fresh air.

Suddenly he was thrown from the roof, the headphones ripped off of his ears and the sun desperate and he was absorbed in the black-blue shade of the sky.

Suddenly he was in front of Dick, who smiled at him a cold smile.

The darkness and silence surrendered them as they looked at each other.

"Why are you here?" Dick asked and his voice was even more cold than his smile.

"I fell from that building and-"

"No," Dick stopped him and raised a hand to stop Tim from talking. "What are you doing in Gotham?" And now Tim saw that the darkness was Gotham.

"What do you mean what am I doing in Gotham? I live here."

"I thought we talked about that Tim. We don't want you here."

Tim heart beat faster and faster as Dick kept talking: "We left you alone because you're rotten"

"Dick I promise to try harder please don't leave me alone" Tim hates it. Once again people can't stand him because of his rottenness. Because he's horrible person who can't help anyone. He looked up at Dick and then he noticed that they were in the cave. Dick was wearing the bat suite and the memory of Damian in Tim's suite was so bright in his mind. And Dick was trying to abandoned him.

"You promised you wouldn't leave me" he said and he could feel the cold hold of the betrayal griping at his heart.

"Tim you need help," Dick said from under the mask, his voice still cold. "I will send you to Arkham and you would be fixed"

"Dick you don't even listening to yourself! I'm not broken there's nothing to fix! I just want to understand why you lied!"

"Because you're rotten Tim! No one will ever wants to stay with you! Not when we have Damian and Jason. You're not part of the family. We don't want you and your rottenness!"

Dick said 'The family' but Tim was sure he meant 'My family' because Tim isn't part of them. He never was. And he understands that, he doesn't wants to be himself and he doesn't want this rottenness.

And then Dick turned around and left Tim to himself. Alone. Trying so hard to stop the tears from spilling out.

And he falls again. All the air in his lungs stolen with a silence scream that fell from his mouth. Air that he needs so badly right now that he finds himself drowning.

He can't move fast enough ant it seems like the water trying to hold him in place -like ropes- and he can't recognize what's up and what's down.

What if he will find his end here? What if he won't see his friends again?

No. He can let that happen. That why he tried to swim to somewhere, and he realizes it was down when a body hit him and carry him all the way up. To safety.

When they broke the water line all the water disappeared and Tim rolled over to his side, spitting water and coughing, his whole body shaking with it.

When he got a grip on his breath he started to stand, his legs and hands and basically all his body shaking from the cold wind that suddenly came, and his eyes met with blue-green eyes. Jason.

"I should've left you there to drown," Jason rough voice greeted him. "Just because you came back to Gotham. We told you a thousand times we don't want you here replacement. For all we care you can die"

But Jason just saved him. Jason saved his life just couple of minutes ago, that sure means that he dose care if Tim dies or not. That also why he let himself talk:

"But-"

"I just saved you because I myself was drowning. I never would have do it by choice. If you ask me when I shoved a batarang into your chest I should have shoved it a few more inches, and I wouldn't be worrying about you fucking everything up with yours rottenness" Jason interrupted him with a harsh truth.

One that made Tim's heart broke a bit before Jason's form melted away. Leaving Tim looking with shock at the spot he was in just seconds ago

"Drake" Damian's voice was strong in the silence and the darkness that once again surrendered Tim.

"You Imbecil," Damian walked throughout the darkness and was now right in front of Tim. "what are you doing here?" His voice was full of hate

"I know, I know I'm not supposed to be here" He dosen't exactly knows why all of them coming to tell him that but he doesn't really care of what Damian have to say, the kid never wanted him around. No matters the fact that he really wanted a little brother.

"Than what are you doing here?" Damian's voice cut through his thoughts "I have no idea" He answered and looked at the boy. And just wait- Where did that katana came from?

"You aren't supposed to be here" He insistent, the katana in his hand was now the only source light in the darkness. And that did nothing to help Tim.

"I know but I can't get out of here" Tim did tried his best not to scream, not to let the frustration get to him but everyone have a red line.

"Then perhaps," Damian's voice was cold, emotional less. "I should help you with that, before you infect other people with yours rottenness"

And there was a 'woosh' sound and a light that moved so fast that the human eye could barely sew before Damian disappeared and Tim fell on his knees, his hands tigh against his belly and his vision goes white with pain as he realized that Damian just stabbed him.

The realization that he was just stabbed by someone who was supposed to be his brother wasn't so knew for him. After all Tim would need more than four hands for counting how many scars his so called family gave him.

And yet here he is, in the darkness, all by himself, trying to keep pressure on the stab wound. Like he never learned a shit that was marked in glowing fucking yellow.

"Tim?" It was Bruce. His eyes were closed and he was suffering from pain but he knows it's Bruce.

"Please Bruce, help me" He have to take the chance. He have to know if there is at least one person that like him at least 0.01%

And apparently there's no one.

"No," Bruce's voice is hard and cold at the same time.

And of course it would be a 'No' who wants to help the rotten child? No one, that's who. Everyone afraid of getting infected by the rottenness.

"You disappointed me," And ouch. Tim really tried not to and yet he always manage to do it. "You came here. Because of you my family my be infected with your rottenness"

*he tears roled down his face because at least Dick tried not to remind Tim of what he could have had if he wasn't rotten.

Bruce started to go away. Taking with him any help that Tim could have had.

And now he was alone again. In the big empty house.

All by himself. Again. Waiting for people who aren't going to come. Apart from the fact that this time he would die.

"Tim!" Someone said, probably someone else that would leave hin alone. "Tim!"

"Tim!" He waked up while Shawn tried to reach out to him.

"What?" Tim said with sleepy voice before he remembered where they are.

"Thanks God! You're fine!" Shawn's cheerful voice was full with relive. And almost made Tim forget about the dream he had. Almost.

Dry lines on his cheeks informed him that he probably cried in his sleep. Which was.. Embarrassing.

He focused on Shawn's face and tried once again to avoid the horrible smell of pee.

"Where are we?" He tried to make his voice terrified and Shawn seems to bought it because his face soften and he smiled a friendly smile at him. "It's will be fine. Don't worry, it happens to me every month, I'm sorry that it happened to you too," his voice was soothing and his friendly smile was still on his face.

"What do you mean it happens to you every month?"

"Oh umm.. My big brother didn't get the family company so every month he kidnaping me just to remind me thag he control everything. But don't worry, he leaves me alone and then I just free myself and go to my way. So you don't need to worry about it, I will get us out of here"

"Okay, I trust you but why aren't you going to the police? They're supposed to help"

The man smiled at him, his green eyes shining "Because he is my brother. Even if he doesn't think about me that way. I love him and I don't want him to get in troubles with the police"

Tim get that. He really does.

"Family drama" he muttered and Shawn smiled widely at him, "Yeah. Family drama."

After a couple of minutes, that Shawn struggled with the ropes (Tim hate thw fact that he isn't supposed to know how to get out of this), Shawn managed to get out of the ropes and went to free Tim.

When his hands were free Tim thanked Shawn and Shawn ruffled his hair with lots of affection.

"Listen, I know it probably sound wird and all but can tou not go to the police? It still my brother after all and I'm worried about him. Plus if you need someone to talk with you can call me. I have your email so I will send you my number. Okay?"

Shawn smiled once again at Tim's node and said "I really hope we will be friends. Without sounding creep and all, you just seems really nice and friendly"

"Yeah me too" Tim said even though he knows he is rotten and he will probably ruin Shawn. But Shawn's smile warmed his heart and he is really nice. Plus Tim really wanted a friend in Gotham. If what happened in his dream will happen in reality at least he would have someone here.

_____________________________________________

"We don't need your help" Bart said again. Hoping that this time the bats would understand.

"Tim is a bat-"

"No." Kon interrupted Dick in the middle of the sentence "Tim isn't a bat, he wasn't one so long and none of you had a problem with that. So don't you dare say that. Tim isn't a bat, he's a titan"

"Yea, he's our robin" Bart added just because he saw the ruined look that was now on Dick's face on Tim's too many times. And it was because of Dick (Well more because of all the bats but Bart really dosen't like Dick for hurting Tim more than anyone else has).

"Don't say it. Timbo is part of us and the titans. You can be both" Jason almost screamed. Tim's friends came to his and Dick's home and demanded to know what happened to Tim because baby bird was missing two days and none of them knew where were his safehouses in Gotham. Which was also his and Dick's problem. And the teens refuse to tell them why was Tim in Gotham (After Jason asked it he cursed himself for asking it. It was baby bird's city too.) or to take any help.

Those stubborn assess told them to go to hell while they would find their robin and then they would take him home and no. Apparently home isn't Gotham.

And it makes his blood boil with anger because yes. Gotham is home to any bat. No matters ehat others say, and now Timbo isn't a bat but a titan.

"Bart" Kon said suddenly. Stopping Bart from saying another horrible but probably right thing about how much the bats suck.

The speedster was next to him and the super whispered something in his ear, making the others eyes wide and with a single nod they both werw gone.

"They have information about Tim" Dick said, his voice was steady but the moment Jason looked him in the eyes he saw how much Dick suffer from this, and he understands this. He wants to hug baby bird right now. Keep him between him and Dick and just hug them both.

Jason wants to atone for his attempts to murder Tim, he wants to ask for forgiveness about everything that he ever did wrong to the precious teen.

He wants to scream because he was sure the clone and the speedster just went to grab Tim and disappear with him.

Without even realising it he was warping his hands around Dick and hugging him. Dick buried his face in the socket between Jason's neck and shoulder, he let out a shuddered breath as Jason's hands moved in soothing circles on his back.

After a couple of minutes Dick pulled away, as much as it hurt him. And he just looked at Jason and "I have something super important to tell you but I'm kind of scared about how you would react"

"You're braking up with me?"

"No. Hell no. I love you so much, and I want you to know it because I have thought about this for so long and I'm pretty sure about that"

Jason was really siruos now, even though he smiled and kissed Dick's hand, muttering "I love you too" into the skin, making Dick smile.

"I-oh God how am I supposed to say that?"

"Dickie just say it"

"Okay, okay." Dick breath in and then whispered fast "I'm pretty sure I love Tim too. The same way I love you."

Jason froze. He wants to yell "What the bloody fuck" but instead his heart started to do flips. He was sure that Dick didn't thought about Tim the same way he did. He was one hundred percent sure at that. But.. if he dose love him..

Dick heart skipped a beat. What if he did the wrong thing? What if Jason would break up with him because of it? What if Jason would hurt Tim because of that? He forced himself to shut those thoughts down.

"Jay? You good?" Dick voice was panicking "Yeah. I'm good big wing." He saw Dick relax a bit and then "You don't need to worry, I'm pretty sure Tim hates me anyway and there's no way I'm going to cheat on you. Nope. I just wanted you to know so.."

"Dick"

"Yes?"

"What if I told you that I feel the same way? About you and Tim I mean"

Dick screams. Jason never thought he would hear someone scream from happiness. But here he is.

"So you with me on that right?"

"Yeah, of course"

And Dick pulled him in for a deep, breath taking kiss. Just in time for a motherfucking blue light to lit on them and then there's othee them again and Damian (with a big scar on his left chick that somehow made him look older but something in his face told Jason that he was younger than their Dami) in their bloody living room.

"What the bloody fucking hell?"

"You took the words right out of my mouth"

"Hey other me! Hey other Jay!" Other Dick smiled and waved them and other Jason crossed his hands on his chest "We are here for Timmy. You know where he is?"

Dick (This universe Dick) shaked his head to signal no and this strange version of Damian let out a "Tt" while rolling his eyes.

_____________________________________________

"We don't need your help" Bart said again. Hoping that this time the bats would understand.

"Tim is a bat-"

"No." Kon interrupted Dick in the middle of the sentence "Tim isn't a bat, he wasn't one so long and none of you had a problem with that. So don't you dare say that. Tim isn't a bat, he's a titan"

"Yea, he's our robin" Bart added just because he saw the ruined look that was now on Dick's face on Tim's too many times. And it was because of Dick (Well more because of all the bats but Bart really dosen't like Dick for hurting Tim more than anyone else has).

"Don't say it. Timbo is part of us and the titans. You can be both" Jason said with an inpatient tone. But Kon didn't even listened to him. Thehy came to this house just to know what happened to Tim because he was missing two days and they didn't knew where were his safehouses in Gotham. And so dose nightwing and red hood. And no matter how many times the bats asked, he and Bart refuse to tell why was Tim in Gotham (Seriously, no matter how much they hated the fact that their robin came back to this stupid city that he knows he doesn't have safe net in, hood is an idiot for asking it because it's red's city too.) or to take any help.

And Bart told them to go to hell while they would find their robin and then they would take him home and no. Home isn't Gotham.

But right now Kon ignores their voices and any other sound and now suddenly he hears Tim's voice. Loud and clear. Calling him.

"Bart" he said when he got the location of Tim. Stopping Bart from saying another jard truth of how horrible the bats are. And in less than second his best friend was next to him and he whispered the location in his ear, making the others eyes wide and with a single nod they both werw gone.

They found their's fearless leader sitting on the edge of the sidewalk, still in his suite. His hair was flying in waves from the wind and he looked up and smiled at them. "Sorry for worrying you. I didn't wanted to be kidnapped"

Kon and Bart talked at the same time with worried and a bit of annoyed tones:

"Are you serious right now?"

"What the hell happened?"

"Family drama. But not mine I just kind of got in the middle of it but on the bright side, I have a new friend"

Kon blinked. Once. Twice.

"Okay.." Bart said, fake coughing to hide the curious in his voice. "So we going home now" Bart looked in Kon's eyes that screamed 'NO' but he still opened his mouth "Andwemaybetoldthebatsthatyouaren'tabatanymore"

"What?!"

"We'll tell you in the tower."

And they were gone in seconds, Bart running to the tower and Kon carrying Tim like a princess and flying to the tower.

_____________________________________________

Laying on hia back, with one hand supports his head he watched on nothing. Letting his mind run and his vision goes blurry.

Damian isn't really sure what to even think. He threatend Drake because of his bad behaviour and attitude to father only to find something that he never thought would have happen. To none of his family.

He may be keeping it to himself but he dose respect Drake. And even like his presence. Sometimes.

He can admit that Drake isn't as horrible as he thought. After all he brought father back.

And he can feel a burning fire inside of him. Looking at the celling in his bedroom. He likes it here. He likes to be in Gotham, by his father's side.

He understands a lot more things about himself now. He have friends and family.. So why does it feel like everything crushing down?

He runs his hand through Alfred the cat's fur again and his chest warm at the sound of the purr the cat let out.

He wants to know why is it so important to him about Drake's missing spleen.

He does enjoy Drake presence sometimes and he does respect him. But he doesn't get what all of this about. What dose the itching feeling in his heart means or why did he search everything about spleen less.

Why does he got so worried when he heard that Drake is missing and why he searched evry part of the city before father send him home. Another reason to hate the test he have tomorrow.

So that's why now he was laying on his bed, looking at the cell with Alfred the cat resting on his chest. And just.. Thinking.

What if he Drake dies?

What if he already dead?

What if he hates Damian?

What if.. What if Damian wants Timothy to see him as a brother and not a threat.

Damian isn't a fool, he knows he fucked it up when he first met Timothy. When Timothy greeted him and he took it us weakness. He knows now that it wasn't, of course, but Timothy was a threat against Damian place in the family back then, at least in Damian's head.

Now he's sure of his place in the family, and he can also see the hole in the shape of Timothy Drake in their family, a hole that they all choose to ignore by thinking that things are fine. But how dose they could even think that? Why did they thought that even though everything that they did, even though they all wronged Timothy, they still thought everything is fine?

Of course, he never doubted that he had a hand in the situation. But he knows that he is willing to make things right. With the hope that Timothy is willing to accept this.

_____________________________________________

Tim laughed quietly while he watched Kon and Bart arguing for the fifth time since they got to the tower. And like all of the previous arguments they had this one was also on stupid TV shows.

He wasn't sure why they kept argument but it kept his mind from thinking about the nightmare.

He may have forgot to mention that when they told each other what happened. (He still was shocked that he and Shown were seated for two fucking days!!)

"Oh Tim I totally forgot!" Bart was behind him in less than second, squeezing his shoulders before he ran away again.

"What?" Was all he could say before Bart was back, back to Tim. Clearly holding something in his hands.

"Oh right!" Kon said, happiness filling his voice.

"All the other things are in your house in Gotham and she have things here too" Bart said, it was clearly to Tim that he wanted to talk fast but slowed himself.

"What are you talking about?"

"You're birthday past and we didn't had the time to give you your present!"

Oh. Tim actually hoped that they forgot about that.

"Just so you know, even if the rest are on mission right now it's from all of the titans" And with this words Bart turned around and Tim gasped with surprise.

Bart hold a tiny dog. The dog's fur was black and beautiful.

("Mother" said a seven years old him, smile that he couldn't fought was on his face. "Can I please have a dog? Please please please please-"

"Timothy stop it. Dogs are horrible and you won't have one as long as I breathe.)

"Tim?" They asked at the same time. And then Tim throw his hands around them both.

"Thank you so, so much" He said and the stopped fighting the stupid smile and just let it be.

"Kon I think we nailed it"

"So," Kon said when they pulled away and gave him the dog "How are you going name her?"

He looked at her face and then said "Pelea."

"And what dose this amazing name means?"

"It's wonder in Hebrew"