i didn’t read as many fics as i wanted in 2024, but i did manage to put together a list of 25 so here they are, separated by fandom !! the dair fics i've read helped give me sm inspo -- enough to start brainstorming again for my cult leader louis fic AND start my first dair fic, so big s/o to the dair fandom -- we were so robbed & somehow y'all still continue to give !! anyway, big thank you to all writers for continuing to bless us all w your creativity — readers, please remember to leave kudos & comments on fics you enjoy !! as always, fics are in alphabetical order <3
(also a moment of silence for @harruandlou who introduced me to dair & therefore had to listen to me talk abt nothing besides them for the last ~3 months)
dair fics:
an utter lack of self-preservation instincts by nevertothethird / @scabopolis
There are many things Blair Waldorf needs: the new sustainable division of Waldorf Designs to be successful, a fresh manicure, and maybe a weekend away with her best-friend.
What she doesn't need is a pretentious Brooklynite with no experience working in the fashion design industry to make her life harder. Or to bring her dinner. Or to look at her like she might be the best thing he's ever seen.
checking it twice by womanaction / @womanaction
Blair creates a checklist for her "perfect man", but someone surprising happens to match up to her demands.
flappers and philosophers by bookishandbossy / @bookishandbossy
Dan Humphrey first meets Blair Waldorf at a party he's not invited to. He doesn't mean to write a story that's all about her, but somehow it happens. Blair Waldorf has every intention of giving an aspiring writer a sharp talking-to about the character he's based on her. She doesn't mean to get fond of him, but somehow it happens. (1920's AU)
god help the girl by secondaudrina / @firstaudrina
At nearly three a.m., the idea of murdering one's neighbor starts to get just a little too appealing.
good night bad morning by secondaudrina / @firstaudrina
Blair refuses to be so hard up that she's giving Dan Humphrey the eye.
hang up and run to me by mysteriesofloves / @mysteriesofloves
“Keep talking,” she says. “I like your voice.”
“Oh,” he says, then, brighter: “oh. Okay. Well. Ha. That’s funny—not that, that’s not funny, that’s…nice, it’s just funny that I can’t stop talking until you ask me to not stop talking, then I can’t think of anything to say.”
“Would you like a prompt?”
“Sure. Yeah. Give me a prompt, Waldorf.”
“What would you do if you were here?”
His breath over the line is like static. “Um. What?”
i knew you’d come back to me by communitys
“Okay,” Dan says. He looks to the side, to Alessandra and the people bathed in the cold bright glow of the party, and feels so removed from them that his conversation with Blair might as well be happening in a different universe. “Okay. So, you’ve been hung up on me all this time”—he ignores her eye roll, like she doesn’t know what she’s doing—”and you’re divorcing your husband, who you only ever married for practical reasons, and what, exactly, do you want from me?”
or, dan writes a book about his relationship with blair, she shows up at the signing, and no one else is in the room for a while after that
just like in the movies by stapler_stealer / @anevildictatoroftaste
“I have five words for you, Mr Humphrey—,” Blair leans in with both palms laid flat on the counter, a triumphant smirk tugging at the corner of her lips. “—The future…is online streaming.”
“And I have four words for you, Miss Waldorf,” Humphrey replies, with a mocking smile. “Get. The. Fuck. Out!”
Or, Blair Waldorf is a ruthless media executive looking to acquire an indie video rental store, seal that damn deal and score that sweet, sweet promotion.
There’s just one teensy little problem that stands in her way — a stubborn, curly-haired store manager by the name of Dan freaking Humphrey.
returning the favour by thestartofnothing / @mrs-nate-humphrey
After Georgina takes Milo away, Dan isn't expecting is Blair Waldorf at his doorstep with a plan to make him feel better.
He certainly isn't expecting her "plan" to involve having kinky sex, for fun.
somewhere you feel free by lizwas / @terrainofheartfelt
Four years ago, Blair had gotten married and fallen off the face of the earth. Dan had already fallen the year before.
Dan keeps Milo. Blair marries Louis. Years later, she returns to New York, divorced and determined to start a new life, beginning with finishing her degree at Columbia. Also a Columbia student? Single parent Dan Humphrey.
sweet comic valentine by mysteriesofloves / @mysteriesofloves
She hates Dan Humphrey. She really does. Any gut punch of a reaction to seeing him calmly wrangle rowdy children is purely biological.
the kind of opposites who do not attract by stapler_stealer / @anevildictatoroftaste
Blair Waldorf doesn’t like being reminded of Dan Humphrey. But that gap-toothed, curly haired man certainly had a knack for being completely unavoidable.
Firstly, the man was her best friend’s husband.
Secondly, he was a journalist, so she was bombarded by constant reminders of him.
That insufferable social climber was everywhere. She couldn’t even check her phone without scrolling past his selfies with Nate Archibald on her Instagram feed. Talk about the ghost of boyfriends past, haunting her ad infinitum.
In other words, Blair Waldorf doesn’t like being reminded of Dan Humphrey, because it's like being reminded of a life she could have had with him.
the pretentious classical music au that no one asked for series by lizwas / @terrainofheartfelt
Her first gig directing at a summer festival, and she gets stuck with Greenwood Lake’s Benedict Arnold.
this city screams your name by illicitaffair / @eyescllsed
The fact that her first audition with Humphrey was an accident would make great PR for the studio. Blair can see it already: headlines boasting Waldorf and Humphrey: Accidental Match of the Century! An Academy Award winner unknowingly instigating a fight with an up and coming actor that a casting director just happened to see, proving their “undeniable” onscreen chemistry? It was the stuff of legends.
Unfortunately, Blair doesn’t see it that way.
alternatively; dan and blair star in a film. it goes about as well as expected.
the milk and honey extended universe by mysteriesofloves / @mysteriesofloves
She wishes Dan Humphrey had never taken a seat across from her their first week here. She wishes she didn’t have to contemplate the way she feels about him at all.
[or, Yale AU].
write this down by mysteriesofloves / @mysteriesofloves
“I am so going to regret asking, but—what exactly are you getting at, Blair?”
Blair takes a deep breath, sitting up straight, and lets it all come out in a rush: “Come with me to Paris and pretend to be my boyfriend.”
you could call me “babe” for the weekend by pentaghastly / @kendallroynsfw
B. WALDORF, the card says, embossed in silver print, and Dan commits that to memory. He’ll probably never see her again, but even so, B. WALDORF etches a space in his brain ten times larger than any five-foot-two socialite should be able to.
He’s surprisingly okay with that.
(or,
Dan is a bartender and Blair is the obnoxiously rich customer who keeps coming in to see him and it's casual, okay, it definitely doesn't mean she's in love.)
Harry has been told all his life how grateful he should be for being born as a male omega, and how blessed their people were because the heir to the throne would be carried by The King.
What they neglected to tell Harry was what would happen if he failed to become pregnant.
OR
Where omega Crown Prince Harry Styles is trying and failing to get pregnant for four years, but all that is about to change when courtesan alpha Louis Tomlinson comes into the equation.
howls like a beast (you flower, you feast) by indiaalphawhiskey / @indiaalphawhiskey
France, 1754.
Château de Versailles.
“You don’t love me,” Louis had said, utterly blasé as he callously fractured the heart of a Harry that was just barely eighteen.
“I do,” Harry had insisted pleadingly, green eyes already watering.
Louis had rolled his eyes, exasperated and flippant in the way only beautiful, young boys could be when faced with the affections of a baby prince. He had run his finger down Harry’s cheek then, had forced him to look into his eyes as he delivered the final blow.
“You’ll change your mind once you’ve seen more of the world,” Louis had teased, pressing a brutally delicate kiss onto Harry’s lovely, pure cheek. “Once you’ve been properly defiled.” He had whispered filthily, delighted by the gasp he heard, the frantic pink blush that had rested high on Harry’s cheeks, the power he had felt at knowing he could make the Crown Prince squirm.
groupie love by cuckootrooke / @larrydoinglaundry
"Now, Louis is only a human. He'd be lying if he said he has never considered his fans attractive but it's not something that happens regularly. Many of them are a little too young for him to look at and those who aren’t so young are rarely squished at the barricade for him to admire. So, seeing a woman like her right at the front is a rare and remarkable surprise for him.
And God does he want to keep looking at her."
In other words, Louis is a rock star on a world tour and Harry is a regular attendee. They could never work.
kitten’s first client by anonymous
Harry settles on his knees, legs together and hands resting gently on his thighs. He looks up at Louis through his lashes, his eyes big and innocent.
"Please, Sir," he says, in a sweet little voice. "May I have permission to suck your cock?"
~
Harry is a kitten hybrid who just started working in a whorehouse. Louis is his client.
pure, pretty, obedient by anonymous
Louis' hand settles on Harry's hip, making him draw in a sharp breath. No alpha has ever touched him there before.
"Aren't you just a lovely little thing," Louis murmurs. "Gonna be so good for me, aren't you, darling?"
~
It's time for Louis and Harry to consummate their marriage. Harry doesn't know much about what's meant to happen on his wedding night. Lucky for him, his new alpha doesn't seem to mind.
ride my sleigh tonight by kingsofeverything / @kingsofeverything
In exchange for free food and drinks at Liam’s office holiday party, Harry pretends to be his boyfriend.
But this is not that story.
staring at the blank page before you by livelaughlovelarry / @loveislarryislove
“Can I ask you a favour?”
Harry blinked. “Um. Depends?”
“It’s nothing weird,” Louis said quickly. “Well. It’s a little weird.”
“Very illuminating,” Harry deadpanned. He had no idea what Louis was going to ask, but he had a pretty good idea that he was going to say yes regardless. Louis had that effect on people.
Louis chuckled. “It’s just – God, bodies are fucking stupid and I can’t visualize the physicality of this fight scene, so I was wondering if I could. Well. Use your body.”
Or, Louis is trying to write his book, but he sometimes has trouble with deciding how the characters should move. Fortunately, his roommate Harry is willing to help him act scenes out. Unfortunately, the line between acting and reality is getting very blurry. Or maybe that's fortunate too.
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okay! not on anon, but I was thinking about this as I brushed my teeth and now turn it to you. one of the sometimes complaints I hear about dair, not even from haters but just casual viewers I know, is that the relationship developed too fast. SO, if we take that as a good faith criticism, what are 1-2 places in s1, s2, and s3, you would have tweaked the narrative to lay the groundwork for their eventual romance? could be slight shifts (e.g., a quick line of dialogue) or major structural changes (e.g., giving one character's plot to dan/blair).
Oh wow, I am so obsessed with this ask!! (Also I know this isn't the ask but in WHAT WORLD is Dair too fast lmaoooo, media literacy is failing in this country so bad, but okay okay ignoring that) Okay so:
Season 1
Obviously, we need to fit the essay contest in their somewhere!!! I'd put it around 114/115 - Blair's been dethroned as Queen Bee, been rejected by both Nate and Chuck, Jenny is making a run for her crown, and Serena is dealing with all the Georgina stuff, so Blair really has no one. And of course, her mom doesn't show up either. But Dan does!! Even though Blair beat him in the contest (a source of antagonism between them previously), he still showed up for reasons unknown to even him. And I'd keep it in line with canon, Blair has no idea he's even there, but we do get one shot of Dan and the LookTM and yeah...
Season 2
More build up to the play!!! I love 218, it's in my GG top episodes, but god I would've loved some more. What were Dan and Blair's reactions to being cast as love interests? What were rehearsals like?? We were given so much but also we were robbed of so much. And then obviously you'd need a scene in there of them admitting to each other that the other is talented..."but if you tell anyone I said that, I will have Dorota send the KGB after you Humphrey" "Dorota is Polish, Blair"
I also think they should've interacted in 221! Dan literally was in Blair's house almost that entire episode and Blair wasn't?? We were robbed.
Season 3
More interaction at NYU. They probably would've taken some of the same classes. Dan's best friend (and later girlfriend) lived down the hall from Blair. I don't think they would've had to become friends but it would've been fun to get some more frenemies/academic rivals bits.
And then idk I think there should've been an acknowledgement of what Dair talked about in 318 after Dan punches Chuck in 322. Even if it's just a simple "you deserve better" or something. Yeah.
*pirouette**arabesque* just dancing in to give another unsolicited song recommendation - "love you like that" by dagny is the song for all your "blair fell first" needs (and workout/power walk mixes). I would include my lyrics of choice, but really it's the whole dang thing, so I'll just drop in part of the chorus: "you know when they say you got the real thing / and nothing else matters? / I love you like that / I love you like that." INSTANT SEROTONIN TO MY BRAIN.
*clumsily soft-shoes in* soooooo funny thing about these lovely unsolicited song recommendations (which are always welcome)…I made you a Thing:
nevertothethird’s Unofficial Dair Playlist
(aka Dan Humphrey and Blair Waldorf Are Total Saps: the Album)
So I took all of your recs from the ask box and ao3 comments, added a few of my own selected tracks and made 🥁🥁🥁 this playlist!
Youtube link here. Tracklist & annotations under the cut. I hope you enjoy! 💖💖💖
Young and in Love - Ingrid Michaelson
Starting strong with this absolute BOP
And you break my walls down (Coming down) / 'Cause you make me fall apart in a good way
Only You - as performed by Joshua Radin
Pulled directly from the ao3 comments on the milo-verse. I was immediately interested bc I love the original so much. Which may or may not be Captain Swan related
Wonder if you'll understand / It's just the touch of your hand / Behind a closed door
Like Ships Need the Sea - Emily Hearn
Another ao3 comment rec
Finally, you gave me the hope I'd awaited / Finally, you gave me your heart
Storm Comin’ - The Wailin’ Jennys
The first of my own inserts to pad out this playlist. I picked this one because a) The Wailin’ Jennys are an all-time fave and their albums were the soundtrack of my writing the “I know a place”-verse (plus that series title is a lyric of theirs!) and b) it’s hella sexy
When that love calls, open up your door
Souvenir - boygenius
Pulling thorns out of my palm / Work a midnight surgery / When you cut a hole into my skull / Do you hate what you see? / Like I do
Best Friend - Ingrid Michaelson
It’s the friends to lovers angst of it al
I keep my mouth shut tight / 'Cause I won't want to lose what's not even mine
Love You Like That - Dagny
Blair Fell First™
I know when I say it, it doesn't say enough / With you close, I'm the happiest I ever was / I tend to avoid getting emotional / I'm not shutting you out
So Long, Honey - Caamp
And there’s this feeling I get / When you’re in the room / I want you to stay
The One You Love - Passenger feat Kate Miller Heidke
Another insert because the VIBES. Something something pure & simple love etc etc
Oh, and if you find someone / That doesn't undermind you / If you find someone / That doesn't drag behind you
ivy - tswift
I wish to know / The fatal flaw that makes you long to be / Magnificently cursed / He's in the room / Your opal eyes are all I wish to see / He wants what's only yours
Strawberries - Caamp
Be my books, head on your shoulder with damn good looks
Jealous - Ingrid Michaelson
I used to be so sweet / Now I see a change coming over me
High and Low - Joshua Radin
This is technically my addition, but only bc there was already so much Radin. I’m not mad about it.
Don't you worry, now / Don't let life get you down / Just remember you're mine
Sweet Love of Mine - Joy Williams
Another insert from me. Joy Williams post-Civil Wars era is SO underrated and anyways she wrote this gorgeous love song/lullaby to her son who happens to be named Miles which is a coincidence I will milk for all it is worth.
I was broken, I was blind / Lost in a moment I thought I left behind / Then you woke up this dark soul of mine / Carrying a light I thought I'd never find
Me & My Dog - boygenius
I had a fever / Until I met you / Now you make me cool
Any of My Trouble - Sawyer Fredericks
I’ve thought this was a “Dan Humphrey is a giant sap” song for quite a while but it didn’t feel right on my other playlist(s)...THIS one though…
So set my heart down in the cold / Let it freeze so I will know / How it feels to be shattered / When you go
Missing You - Ingrid Michaelson
Never, you said this had dan/nate vibes so now everytime I listen to it that’s what I think…I may just have to write a fic about it and it’ll be YOUR FAULT <3
I'm in his bed again / Feeling like a stranger / When he's kissing me, I'm missing you
Hate You - Ingrid Michaelson
Okay normally 2 consecutive tracks from the same artist feels Wrong to me but here I think it works.
So much swirling up inside my head / Of what I didn't do or what I should have said
Skinny Love - Bon Iver
I tell my love to wreck it all / Cut out all the ropes and let me fall
Stay Down - boygenius
Wasn't a fighter until somebody told me / I had better learn to lean into the punch / So it don't hurt as bad when they leave / There you were, turning your cheek
Walking on a String - Matt Berninger & Phoebe Bridgers
I knew that I was dead before you touched my lonesome skin / You're never running out of ways to worm your way back in
Hey Kid - Ingrid Michaelson
This song was not one of your og Ingrid recs, but I thought it fit, so it had to go in here.
These arms and this heart / They are the only things that I have left to give
Little Giant - Roo Panes
Have the heart of a giant, but know you're a man / Start small, grow tall
By and by - Caamp
Just wish I'd spent more time / Listenin’ to her speak her mind
Call It Dreaming - Iron & Wine
Say it's here where our pieces fall in place / Any rain softly kisses us on the face…For all the love you've left behind / You can have mine
Today - Joshua Radin
it’s got the romance AND the found family
And you are the one I've been waiting for today
Feels Like Home - Caamp
Know that I lived my whole life long / And gave all the love that I could've given
The Muse - The Wood Brothers
Included for many obvious reasons, the title of course, and the dilf!dan of it all
Times like these so sweet and so true / Thinkin’s the last thing that you wanna do
This Is Why I Need You - Jesse Ruben
it’s about how living is hard but this is what makes it worth it.
You are the who, love is the what, and this is the why
on a completely separate note, I am just re-remembering how much of a jerk max was starting in 2x17 through the end of the season and this show...just wanted me to be happy he and liz got back together???!!! what??!!
LMAO. what even is max evans?
He's like, "I'll help you find out what happened to alex." Then, he comforts her at his house and promises to always be her friend. The next day, AT THE FUNERAL, he says "liz, there's nothing weird here, I saw the files, alex killed himself" and then "if you leave, our friendship is over." like, WHAT THE HELL, DUDE? and, of couse, now that liz's gone TO SWEDEN, he has to go sleep with tess, right? seems like the logical step to take after all that went down, totally.
and then it's all basically "yeah, I got tess pregnant but you slept with kyle, liz, so it cancels it out, right? like, we're even, we both fucked up, BUT YOU fucked up FIRST, liz, so.. what right do you even have to get mad? right?? righttt?? .. oh, what's that? you and kyle never slept together? oh... must be time for me to ugly cry then and act pathetic." [a few moments later] "wAiT, WHAT??!! tess killed alex?!?! ok, then. I'm done with her and antar. you're the only one that ever mattered to me, liz. I've been really wrong about a lot. but I was right about one thing, to get you into my life, to be around you, to love you."
NO NEED TO SAY SORRY, I GUESS. classic max evans.-
so much was left unspoken. season 3 didn't even give us enough flashbacks showing him apologizing to liz and her dealing with it all and having a very hard time forgiving him. 'busted' tried, but it wasn't enough in my opinion.
I owe you a much longer official review, but I just read your new wip, and HOLY HELL. The YEARNING. The ROMANCE. The themes of comfort, security, and belonging??? Lizzie McGuire was wrong: THIS is what dreams are made of. Also, hello! I miss having you swoop into my inbox anonymously. Hope all is as well as can be! xx
Oh, darling, thank you so much! I am struggling with... writing in general lately, so it’s so lovely to hear this. Makes me want to go back and keep muddling through.
(Hello right back! I may have to do some random swooping soon, just for the hell of it. Never watched Veronica Mars in my life, but I found your snippet you reblogged today absolutely delightful!)
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Hello! Tis I, Santa Nonny!, anonymous no more! Thank you for being an absolute gem. It was a total joy to get to write this for you and I hope it brings you even an oz of Christmas cheer. xx
HELLLOOOO!!!!!!
Oh, we must be in different time zones, i just now saw your gift. THANK YOUUUUU!!!!!
i am DANCING MY HAPPY DANCE!!!!
Thank YOU for being such an awesome Santa nonny, and for persevering despite tumblr being its dumpster-fire-y-iest self. (i have not had coffee. That made sense in my head. "Dumpster-fire-y-iest" is totally a word, right?)
Anyway, THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!! 💖💖💖
Let me get some of said coffee and i will read your story and i already LOVE IT. (i may have peeked. AND CHEERED OUT LOUD.)
Here's my "I misunderstood harry potter" moment - I didn't realize a balaclava was a ski mask, so I misread it as baklava (the delicious Greek dessert) which meant I thought Hagrid perpetually walked around Hogwarts with a plate of baklava at all times and no one every questioned it.
