#nct softhours

The feeling of waking up in a frigid bed, the same bed that had been smouldering with sultry sensations the night before drenches you from the inside, as if hollow. 

You woke up feeling the same way; the covers were chilly and empty. This atmosphere was in stark contrast to the intense night with Jeno. He sure was mad enough to be behaving like this. This was the first time he left you alone in the morning. In less than ten hours had already shown you a side of him that you had never expected to see but looking at it from the other side, he wasn't the one entirely at fault, you thought to yourself. Had you been in his shoes, you would've reacted worse. 

You thought about how you would face Jeno again, would he even talk to you ever again? Maybe there was some way or the other that you could make him understand. Was this why everyone called you out for taking advantage of him? Why would you let him into your heart if one day he ultimately had to leave? Jeno was indeed jealous, but friends don't get envious of another person and then fuck the hell out of them, friends don't cry over this.

Again, that's complicated.

You managed to get yourself out of the cold bed, turning on the music, it was the only way you could allow yourself to forget the blunder you had gotten yourself into.

Nevertheless, you continued to check your phone, hoping to receive a missed call from Jeno or at the very least a text from him.

On the other hand, you paid heed to the texts you received from your mother, Haechan, and even Chenle, whose party you skipped. You felt bad for your friend, he had been preparing for it for months only for both you and Jeno to not show up.

You stepped under the hot shower, allowing every single drop of water to slip down as though it would rinse off all your troubles, taking you away to some utopian world. 

-

Walking to the class felt empty without Jeno, there was no hand to hold, no daily morning glares. Only the crisp fallen leaves on the concrete pavement greeted you. 

Your eyes recognised Chenle, he had been walking ahead of you all of the time but your useless thinking offered you no time to take your surroundings into mind.

You gave him a shoulder tap. "Chenle!" You yelled. 

"Don't talk to me. Where were you last night?" He was complaining.

"I just- you know" You failed to give him an exact answer, trying to respond vaguely. 

"And even Jeno. Y/N please don't tell me you two ditched me last night just so that you could fuck." He said.

"Why would I do that? Chenle, I'm sorry." You continued. "I'll let you know soon enough."

"Yeah?" Sarcasm was voiced out of his words.

"Okay stop now, you little sulky being." You teased him and he stuck his tongue out. Just like that, he lifted up your spirits, even if it was for a minute or less.

"Isn't Jeno coming with you today?" He asked.

"Oh. Well, I think that he must be skipping the class, maybe he's at the football ground." You justified.

"Are you sure everything is okay?" He questioned, again.

"Of course!" You put a smile on his face, gesturing with your arm as you reached the lecture hall. 

-

Jeno was still nowhere to be seen in the scenario. He appeared to be genuinely intent on ignoring it. You couldn't stop wondering how Jeno cracked the code. Who could have told him? And why would they have done it to you?

You glanced ahead, the fluffy-haired boy in front of you kept giving you the look time and again. You suddenly experienced profound enlightenment, and it was him. Of course, it was him.

"Haechan!" With your foot, you prodded his chair's back.

"Not in the middle of a damn lecture." He reverted, shutting you up.

-

"Why would you do this, you filthy piece of crap?!" You were essentially shouting at Haechan in a certain cafeteria section.

"You could've picked up your phone when I called you." He rolled his eyes and made an effort to defend himself.

"As if that would change fuck!" You spat out these words harshly in his face.

"I'm so sick of being your guys' mutual friend." He was being too much.

"Y/N are- are you crying?" Haechan softened his gaze. He looked at your face more closely, lifting it up with his chin.

"You are not!" He cried.

"Real bitches don't cry!" You pretended to flip your hair, making the two of you laugh.

"I really did not mean to tell him, he just overheard when I was talking to your mom." He continued. "And then I had no time to explain, he just ran straight to you."

"Hmmmm." You nodded back, processing every bit of information he was providing you with.

Lee Haechan.  Your best friend since you were born. It was like this friendship was passed onto you two by your mothers, they had been best friends since their younger days, and it was more than just a coincidence that you and Haechan were brought into this world almost at the same time. Growing up was a shared experience; you had always been together from kindergarten to university. 

"When we grow old, we should build a cottage in the woods, far away from the city." Little Haechan of seven suggested.

"But we won't get any TV there." You reasoned, disapproving of your friend's suggestion.

"Old people don't watch that stuff. Look at Granny." He pointed out.

"Maybe we can, but you are annoying."

"Then give me my candy back, you little pony!"

He knew your deepest secrets, even though there was a non-stop contest of bickering, teasing and earning out the filthiest words of curses from one another, friendships like these were hard to come by. He was all you could need, a friend, a nemesis, a free dating advisor, a personal frustration dustbin, well, what not?

"Maybe I should go and see him at the field." You thought of earning a nod of approval from Haechan.

"I would say NO if it was some other chap but then you both are in love so my opinion would differ." Haechan stated.

"That's YES in simpler words." You crossed your arms, shaking your head. "Lee Haechan. Such a pain in the ass." 

-

The field's green grass was being blocked from wilting freely, and the raucous movements of spiked shoes were making it worse. The sun shone brightly above, but it wasn't as gentle as the winter sun or too scorching to make you sweat.

He was positioned in the middle, drenched in sweat with his thighs exposed. On his pale forehead, his untamed black hair was haphazardly scattered.

"Pass!" He yelled in the middle of the match.

"Jeno did it!" A wave of cheer rose like an ocean, everybody rejoiced as their star player secured another goal for their team, winning the game.

You thought your wait ended with the game too.

"Jeno?" He turned to face you when you waved your hand at him, and you held his gaze for a considerable amount of time.

And then he looked away. Ignoring you.

This was enough, even when you were ready to make amends, get him seated and tell him everything, he decided to ignore it and this made you furious. Picking up your bag, you walked out of the field.

-

Saturday's rising sun marked the inception of the college break. Everyone had their bags packed, moving out of their dorms, filled with enthusiasm and joy, getting to meet their families again, unlike you. It was not like you did not want to see them, but knowing beforehand what would be the scene created once you reached home blew away the joyful flame.

-

On reaching home you were greeted by the grey and white concrete walls that had been adorned with all and every kind of antiques that could have been obtained. The golden lighting and wooden interior blended well with the minimal colour scheme.

The hallway displayed statues of men and women, that must have taken years to be sculpted, named in a language you could not even comprehend. They claimed that each held a deeper significant meaning behind them. Lies. They were only for the pomp and show.

The garden had already begun to bloom with the season's flower, as if nature had embraced it, not far from where a dozen cars were lined up in a perfect colour gradient, as if they would serve a purpose greater than mere transportation. 

This was home. However, a house without any emotional ties was merely a fortified building. Your parents provided you with everything you would have ever needed within the premise of this mansion that they had built, but only if they cared about more than just the money.

-

"You changed these?" You said, running your hand up and down the fabric of the couch, which seemed novel to you.

"I had to, and for once, would you not stop concentrating on the unimportant things?" Your mother reprimanded you while averting her gaze from the other women. They displayed clothing, decor, and jewellery catalogues while wearing all-formal attire. Getting rejected nine out of ten times by your mother. 

"It's serious! When it comes to the wedding of my sole daughter, I cannot compromise at this level!" She gave a firm reply. She had a look of exasperation on her face, but she never screamed since that was not proper behaviour in a sophisticated household.

Envy, hate, and despair, all disgusting feelings, would always be communicated with the classiest of words and a curve of the lips.

"We are not getting married!" You objected.

"You'll do. Very quickly" She returned the smile.

"This is pointless." While maintaining a fixed look on the ground, you muttered.

"Do you mind if we take a moment's break?" Your mother requested the ladies' leave.

"If you're here you would want to go and get the fitting of your dresses before it's too late." She asserted. 

"What? What kind of dresses?" You questioned. 

She sighed, resting her face on the back of her hands. "Clothes. This can't be something you wear all the time." She looked at you and commented on your attire. The loose-fitting jeans.

You pouted, rolled your eyes, and made the decision to leave the room.

"Your brother would be there to greet you." She spoke from behind, knowing that if that were the case, you would never decline.

"Bye!" You yelled.

-

"Baby!" A man in his late twenties, dressed in black trousers and a half-sleeved silk shirt beamed at the sight of you. He spread his arms out, his fingers gripping the car keys. 

"I'm not a baby!" As you hugged him, you cried back.

"Fancy jeans." He complimented. 

"Say that in front of mom." You made a joke, and he laughed.

"Hop in." He motioned towards his gleaming carmine Rolls Royce

Jaehyun was the best brother anyone could ask for. Given the five-year age gap between you two, it was very natural for him to be overly protective of you. Then, whether it was the toddlers who wouldn't play with you or giddy crushes from high school, he got them all covered. It was like a tradition for siblings to attend the same school and his reputation and achievements never allowed you to cause any trouble and have the fun of your life. Thank heavens!, Jaehyun never went to the same college as you.

"I saw our childhood pictures in the living room, the ones hung on the photo wall." You rejoiced.

"Oh, the one in which I'm holding you in my arms is my favourite. You used to be so tiny." He was smiling throughout. 

All of these memories were still present before your eyes, still vivid.

You still remember Jisung, your first crush in middle school.

"Y/N I like you a lot." With white flowers in his hands that he had personally selected from the school lawn and a tone of pink decorating his cheeks, he admitted.

You returned his smile while considering his colour scheme. The roses didn't spread very far.

"Jisung I`"

"I don't want you to respond with anything. I don't believe I'll be able to manage it." He spoke.

"Huh?" You were perplexed.

"Actually, I'm terrified of your brother. He is frightful, as are his buddies." Jisung spoke hastily. "He has already warned me twice."

"He won't harm you or any-"

"Please accept these; I like you a lot. Bye." He hurriedly said goodbye before departing. 

This had been your very first romantic experience. 

Back in the present, you were enjoying hearty talks with your brother who was in the driving seat. The last me you came back home, he had been handling business overseas so it had been quite some time since you last saw him.

"Remember Jisung?" You questioned.

"Yes, of course." He chuckled. "I recall Sungchan as well." He spoke.

"He was, without a doubt, the boldest. I have no idea how we maintained our relationship for five weeks." Your hands were covering your face.

"It's love, dumb." As he spoke, he suddenly became more serious. In a split second, the smile vanished from his face.

"Right." While your thoughts were still focused on Jeno, you hummed in agreement with what he stated.

"What about Jaemin all of a sudden?" You inquired. The past two had been a whirlwind, all thanks to him.

"Did mom not tell you?" Jaehyun answered back with a question.

"Mom told everyone but me." You turned your face away, gazing out of the window.

"Aww don't be pouty." Jaehyun pacified you by pinching your cheek with his free hand.

"Why am I being asked to marry a person I don't even know?!" You yanked his hand away in fury. "I am twenty-three! I know how to make decisions on my own?!" 

It seemed like one was being imprisoned in a gilded cage to be attached to someone like this. The ties of marriage would take away all of your independence, goals, and feelings, and they would do the same for your eventual spouse. Of course, everyone in the family would claim that it was done for the sake of tradition, but everyone understood that it was really just a way for the business to increase profits, and perhaps the kids were simply there to help with capital expansion. Life couldn't always be seen through rose-tinted glasses, where marriages would be fixed when they were only crawling babies and stayed in love for the rest of their lives. When your cousins and the rest of your family had to go through this, it looked so simple, but when it came to you, it seemed as if your heart had fallen into the abyss. There was no longer a choice to delay. You were a bird in a cage.

"If it were all up to me I'd never make you go through this." Jaehyun calmed you down with a visible tone of pain in his voice.

The car stopped and you got out of it. A ride that started with reminiscing about the happy days ended on a heavy note.

-

"Ms Y/N, Welcome! Your mother already visited last week and selected these for you." A man dressed in a suit gestured towards a silver clothes rail. 

"This would fit your body type just well." Another lady who had been helping you all along complimented you, and you grinned unenthusiastically in response. You were in some ways your mother's daughter. It was challenging to let go of the characteristics that were ingrained in you when you were a baby. Okay, so perhaps they vanished while you were with Haechan.

The colours, the shapes, everything about the clothes your mother picked out for you didn't go well with your sense of style. None of the designer labels could match the appeal of personally picked clothing. Nevertheless, you thanked the group for their time and effort. All the boxes were carried behind you by two men.

"We're done." You signalled to Jaehyun, who had seated himself on a couch outside the fitting rooms.

He hummed, toying with the car keys. 

"Wait." You blurted out, moving towards one of the racks.

"Daeun would look so adorable in these!" You grinned as you held a pair of small, fluffy, cushioned shoes that could have fit in your hand.

"Aww look at them, this is the cutest thing I've seen today!" You were drooling over the shoes as you held them out to him.

"She would!" His black eyes appeared to sprout hearts, and a soft smile spread across his face, illuminating it and revealing his dimples. Jaehyun prioritised his love for his daughter above everything else despite what had transpired.

This made you look at him and rewind five years ago. He was married out of his choice to some decent girl from a house as wealthy as yours, and your family had known for generations. She embodied all that a beautiful lady could be until she decided to leave everything behind for her lover. Despite all that Jaehyun had today, there was still an empty void in his life, of love. He only loved once, never daring to open his heart to anyone else. Inside he was happy for his wife, for she could enjoy the privilege of love, if not for him, his heart only belonged to one person. He did not love his wife; in contrast to her, he did not flee. He had before experienced the lightning-like ache of heartbreak.

Your life had always been modelled after Jaehyun's. His life was a sort of blueprint for yours.

-

"Mark?" As soon as you entered the home, you exclaimed, giving him a bear embrace. "Many years! What are you doing?"

"Have been busy, haven't you?" Jaehyun said, excusing himself after the short meeting.

"Yo! What is happening?" When he first heard the news from your family, he was shocked.

"Oh don't ask!" You sighed dramatically. 

In the evening, you and your cousin Mark sat down at a coffee table and you poured out every single idea that had been weighing you down the previous week.

Mark did not frequently visit because his father had a successful business in Canada. He was far away, yet you always managed to remain in touch.

"Is he known to anyone in the family?" He asked in a reassuring yet serious tone.

"You are the very first. I'm not even sure whether he feels the same way about me." After exhaling, you gave your head a shake as if to dust the troubles away.

"Don't stress out too much over it; sometimes it's best to let things happen naturally and go with the flow; everything will be alright in the end. You are aware that I am always available to you." He gave comfort.

"Do you want me to cry?" You said.

"Mark, Hello!" Haechan walked into the room, it was pretty common, he was like the family's son. 

"Hey, buddy!" Mark fist-bumped him.

"I talked to him before, he said.."

"What did he say?" You queried. 

"He-he doesn't want to see you." 

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Surreal. One word that was apt enough to describe last night. The night that fell was followed by an ordinary Thursday, but nevertheless, you and Jeno had by now perfected the art of making nights special. Your mind recalled all the scenes, the kissings, the bitings, the caressings, the touchings and the fucking. Goddamn! You sure were lucky to call him yours.

The guy from the Chemistry major (who couldn’t give a damn about the valences and nomenclatures). Not many boys in the department’s history were as ripped as he was. Flaunting his muscles wasn't even a flex for him at this point, let alone the gym sessions when first-year females would wait up to catch a glimpse of him. Of course, tickets for games featuring Jeno were difficult to come by. His flawless body was matched by an equally flawless face. His jaw line was conceptually sharper than a dagger, and his eyes were carved like those of some Greek God. To put it simply, he was hot.

However, this morning, he wasn’t present.

Even though his appearance might lead people to think otherwise, Jeno was not a fuckboy. Usually, he would stay till the morning, or refuse to leave if it was not for college. Where had he gone? He could certainly not ghost you, given that it was HIS room and his DORM, which was more like a frat house. No, it wasn’t easy to sneak into the boys' dormitory at the late hours of the night, but yet again, you mastered it.

You decide to put on one of his hoodies and step out of the room as you fixed your appearance.

The couch, which was originally orange or whatever, now resembled a doormat. His roommates didn't even bother to take off their shoes. A half-dozen Lays, alone without potato chips inside, were strewn on the floor, along with some complementary beer cans, all empty, of course. With the discarded pizza boxes, there was possibly a notebook or two. The place was a disaster, and who'd forget those gleaming red boxers that stole the show?

"The only thing I ask for in this house is a bit of basic human decency!" Shouted a black haired boy from the kitchen, who was apparently trying to make himself food.

"Fuck your manners, where the hell is Chenle’s dog?" Another one was quick to revert as he searched for the dog, destructing every single object that came his way, adding more to the already chaotic set.

Finally, you noticed a familiar face among them. It was Jaemin who was unconcerned with the ruckus; he sat down on the couch and focused solely on his espresso and the phone screen that was only millimetres away from his face.

Everyone but Jeno was here.

CLINK! Your attention was grabbed by the loud noise. It was one of the ceramic dishes from the kitchen. "That was my favourite one!" Screamed the brown haired boy, still in search of the animal. "Then stop bringing these animals home!" Provoked the other from the kitchen.

"Jaemin! Good Morning!" You greeted him even thought it was probably afternoon. He flashed a huge smile as his eyes grew bigger, like a baby at the sight of candies. "Heyy Y/N~" He was extra. You wasted no time in inquiring. "Do you possibly know where-" "Where is Jeno? He had to leave early morning for basketball, they rescheduled the fixtures, his team is playing tomorrow." Jaemin provided data in the manner of a support desk professional. He was courteous enough to make room for you on the couch.

His eyes wandered as he struggled to find the clock. "It’s about time he’d be back." He barely finished as a little white haired dog, which you quickly identified as a Bichon Frise hopped onto your lap. It’s hair was groomed rather unevenly, yet it was too adorable. You could not help but pet it, eyes like some buttoned stuffed toy.

"There she is!" The boy who was looking for it rejoiced. He sat himself down on the coffee table, sighing out of relief. "Hi! I’m Haechan!" He offered you a handshake that you gladly accepted, introducing yourself.

"Your dog is cute! What’s her name?" You inquired. "Thanks, Daegal, she actually belongs to another friend." He explained.

"Why don’t you also tell her that Daegal is your girlfriend?" Suggested the kitchen boy, this time with some actual food in the plates. He handed you one of them in your hands, "I’m Renjun, I knew you’d be starving so I made you lunch." This boy was an angel.

Just as you began to dig in, the front doorknob twisted, revealing your boyfriend, who was now back. He was dripping with sweat as his thick, black hair scattered in all possible directions. The physical activity only made him bluffer and hotter.

"Y/N! I’m sorry I had to leave." He said. "No, that doesn’t matter, your friends are actually nice and so is this place, I guess." You expressed.

"Pfft, it’s ok, you don’t have to lie. I know this place is horrible, but unfortunately I don’t actually have any other options. For the moment, this is home." There was this trait of his that you loved, he was brutally honest. You knew how badly he wanted to rent his own condo, but then, he sure was not regretting living with this bunch of guys here.

Jeno sat himself next to you as he laid his head back. The remaining four of you just watched. A minute or so went by.

"Did any of these assholes mess with you?" Jeno broke the awkward silence.

The other two boys gave him a death glare while Jaemin was still glued to his phone. "Hehe" you laughed, awkwardly again. "No, why would they? You’ve got some nice friends, Jen." You said.

"I even made her food." Renjun added, earning a nod from Jeno.

"You guys should be attending your lectures right now." Jeno asserted, to which his mates responded with questioning eyes. You did not know whether or not they had classes, but this was one of the many ways  of your guy to shove them out of the room.

"Come on! Leave, you’ll be late!" He implied, poking Jaemin’s arm, who laid on the side with his knee. The boys bid a mini farewell as they headed out.

In a flash, Jeno turned to you. His dark eyes were staring into yours as a devilish little smile took over his face. "I still have some amends to make." He whispered next to your ear, seductively. He brought his face even closer as he looked at you again, seeking permission. You could not refuse, you were hungry for the kiss.

He gently held your face with his veiny hands as you grasped his shoulder, your lips just a distance apart. Jeno was enticing.

"I SWEAR TO GOD! NOW WHERE DID DAEGAL GO AGAIN?!" The door slammed open. You both hurriedly pulled back. You looked at Jeno, who was annoyed. He appeared to be on the verge of crying at any minute.

The mayhem began all over again. After all, this was home.

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CREAK! The main door was louder than you expected, at least in the dread of the night.

Chenle facepalmed as he let out an airy sigh and then shook his head a few times. He was dressed in his favourite black hoodie with the matching black hair scattered on his forehead, unruly. He sprinted towards you, ensuring he didn't let out any sort of sound.

"You don't even know how to sneak out, idiot!" He grabbed your hand in his, pulling you swiftly.

However, something caused him to halt in his tracks, turn around, and face you.

"Why are you.. sweating?" He wore a bewildered look on his face

"What if they find out? It's freaking 2 am! Holy shit! I'm so scared." You let it all out in one breath, turning the boy's lips and eyes into little crescents. 

"We are not running away, we are just getting ice cream." He soothed.

 "Awww look at that face. Is it the same baddie from school?" He poked your cheek. 

You had never sneaked out at midnight like this before, and there is something about the unexpected that frightens everyone, even if later on it is laughed at and told as a tale.

"There!" The maple tree, whose leaves had already begun to fall, was Chenle's point of reference. He cleared a spot by using hoodie's sleeve.

"How old are you? Seven?" Before sitting down and resting your head on his shoulder, you smacked him gently.

"Please don't drop your ice cream on me; I don't like Butterscotch." He teased, laughing by himself seconds later.

Another playful hit. 

Your only focus was the cone in your hands. On the other hand, Chenle's only focus was on you.

You two sat under the tree with the scarlet leaves, your fingers entwined. A year of your togetherness would end with the approach of fall, which was not too far away. There was stunned silence, a quiet that was at ease.

With his thumb, Chenle caressed the back of your hand.

"I love you."

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