#narcolepsy

I've been reading into it for two days straight now.

I used to think I was always tired due to my ed, but it's been years since I have lived with restrictions and I remained just as tired.

I always knew that I randomly fell asleep, that I was always weirdly tired after school when I was a child, and later I would just fall asleep on the bus.

When I went on walks, I would often stop under a tree to take a nap there and later in life I'd just fall asleep at train stations.

It's been the most normal thing for me for some years now that I would fall asleep on the train regardless of how much I have slept at night and when I don't have uni and don't have to be on the train I still fall asleep several times a day.

I also always thought it's a weird quirky that I drop to the ground when laughing while standing or dropping my head onto a table when laughing while seated.

Like??? Maybe I'm over-interpreting, as I want to find out why I am so weird and why it seems to be so much effort to appear as a normal person.

For some years now, I have been developing phases of nightly panic attacks, insomnia, and being incapable of getting my work done when I want, as I felt my spine losing strength to sit up for much longer and it would always end in a nap.

I can tell when my naps happen.

Nightly sleep: 10pm - 6am

1st nap: 11am

or/ and

2nd nap: 1pm

3rd nap: 5:30pm

and then it's not a nap, but I need to lie down, because my body barely has any strength left: 8pm-9pm