#nano rant

Cause you see I was having a good ol unhelpful helping of writers block. And the point where I currently am in the plot there is no way to skip to the next scene without writing this one (it's just too flowy if you know what I mean).

So in the interest of getting crap on paper and hitting my word count for the day, I skipped to the climax (???) of the book.

And basically my dillema is I want someone to read it because I'm so ffreaking exttied by my own plot twists and turns, but I don't want to spoil it for anyone who actually wants to read it.

And it has to be someone who has at least read part of what I've already written (or is willing to have 38ish pages of exposition dumped on them so they can read the climax with some contex).

Ahhh where do I even start?

This month has been the highlight and saviour of 2020 for me. I did what i never would have seen myself do.

The week before NaNoWriMo i already had the full scene by scene by chapter outline for act 2 of the book i wrote last year. And then i saw this literally 2 line post. And i reblogged and in the tags i just started small but then i wrote more and more and i realized that i just created a whole ass story on the spot. So i didn't reblog it publicly. I'm a total planner and so it surprised me that i decided to say fuck it and outline an entire novel that i just thought of a few days before NaNo.

And so i did. I ended up with a prologue, 26 chapters and an epilogue.

I completed my goal of writing a chapter a day. I reached the 50k mark at the 16th and i finished my whole first novel at the 27th.

So I have 80k words and 200 pages that together make up an entire novel, my novel, an entire first draft that i wrote in a month.

I laughed and cried so much, i pulled my hair out one day and wrote 5k in one sitting the next day.

NaNo is an experience like no other. I know it is literally in the name that you will write a novel in a month but... I just can't believe i did it. I was a NaNo winner last year too and got 50k and i did that in the very last week which is incredible. But this just feels so much more different.

An entire novel, can you imagine? Like the one on bookshelves.

There are no more words to be written in my novel. The only word that is left in my head to describe this is surreal.

I'm so happy and proud of myself and i cried so much when the last chapter ended. Then i cried when the epilogue ended. And then i cried after that too. And now i am crying bc i fucking did it.

This chapter was a little hard to write bc I didn't have enough scenes for it to be long but I managed to get the min amount that I wanted.

Good part is I wrote from 12-14 all the way through and finished today's chapter in one go.

Kinda bad news is that this day's chapter turned up to only be 1.6k words.

But I can't think of any good way to add to this chapter anything without it seeming odd and forced.

So today was a fun chapter to write

...Maybe