#moral code

He is basically interpreting it as I’m banning him from seeing his friends or cutting them off entirely. He has a group of friends since high school; they play card games together, 2-3x a week; every play date lasts up to 7 hrs, ending at odd hours of the night 2-3 a.m. + etc. We don’t live together, so initially I didn’t care or put thought into it; they started this weekly meetup approximately 7 months ago. What caught my attention was that he would disappear for many hours, and I’d message and get a reply every few hours; it ended up frustrating me and bringing it up. Now I don’t know these friends, never met them, but from what he’s told me, they are “the boys”; it seems they are comfortable making jokes about women and belittling other people and/or racist jokes or remarks or saying “gay” as a joke. Using slurs like retarded, etc. I even asked “would these men be safe and comfortable to be around your daughter?” And he hesitated to answer and eventually said no. My bf is not like that in the time I’ve known him (3 years now), but he seems too comfortable in that type of environment, and I’ve asked him to reflect if that is a good group of people to be around. We were planning on moving in together at least in the talks. But I brought up how you are who you surround yourself with; he has defended this group of men saying he is not cutting them off and as if I’m basically asking him to leave them. The end goal is marriage; the friends never seemed a problem (he rarely saw them in the beginning), but now they’re a part of his weekly routine for the past 7 months. It makes me think if we do move in together and get married, these guys will be a part of our life or at least his, but to my understanding, when you marry someone, you become 1. So idk how I feel about it.

In 2023 M29 we will call him josh, wanted to date me F28. I wasn't dating at the time because I was focused on school and work. We were friends through ups and downs while I was in college, but we didn't talk when I got a boyfriend. In January my boyfriend broke up with me to move to New York and has since ghosted me. It's opened up some mental and emotional space for me and josh was eager to give him and I a try - even if I need to start slow. So the date. He was charming, so charismatic. Romantic too, he reminded me all the things he remembered about me and said I am the most beautiful girl. But then, he told me his dating history. His last gf and him broke up a year ago. He had taken her on vacation out of the country, and he said he admitted he fell in love with her during that trip, she said the same back. The week she went home, he said he was lonely and had slept with another woman four time that same week. He said he felt guilty, called and confessed and she said she could stay with him but he dumped her bc he said the relationship was just over at that point. He also admitted, in college he slept with HIS friend's girlfriend. He said in the past three years he has been on multiple trips with different women to other countries, staying at hotels and sleeping with them. His longest relationship before the recent one, he dated for a year and moved in with her, he cheated on her twice. Once after even meeting her family. When he cheated he kicked her out, packed her bags and told her to leave his place, then apologized days later with a picnic was taken back in and a few more days later went on vacation with her family. She even met his parents, but in the end he said he had feelings for two women and broke it off. He also said on social media he used to love flirting with women of all ages and backgrounds for validation when he felt insecure. He said he is different now, he said he has been studying to find a religion and worked with a therapist to address his issues ( i dont know how long for) and he said he is doing grounding and meditation work and found other outlets to control his impulses like intense cardio work outs. He said he is being honest and upfront with me about his past because he has turned a new leaf. But I am worried this is just a set up for failure. I just lost a man I really loved and adored but the thing I was attracted to was respect. Could this man have potential to be respectful of me and not to do to me what he has done for others, or would I be signing up for a train wreck. (sorry) I mean he was an incredible friend, but I don't and can't imagine treating people I love the way he does. This isnt something to brag about it is just a simple fact but when I was single in college - some men would approach me or try to cheat or flirt with me (on their gfs) every single one I blocked. I felt sick imagining even doing that to another girl. Would it be best to cut ties now, on both the friendship and relationship? It would be sad as I have lost two very important people to me to ghosting but I think I also need to think through things clearly and not project what I wish people were onto them and see them as who they are. I just always feel so optmistic, tell me your honest thoughts.

Spider-Man is notoriously known for his “no-kill” rule, prioritizing the protection of others rather than acting as an executioner. But why is it so important that he never crosses that line? Some might argue that killing criminals would permanently end their injustices and ultimately make the world safer. However, what is often overlooked is that once a hero makes that choice, they begin to lose the very title that defines them.

A hero represents a moral standard rooted in compassion and restraint, even when violence feels justified. Heroes do not fight simply to defeat villains; they fight to protect life. When a hero decides that they have the right to take a life, the line between justice and personal judgment becomes dangerously blurred. After making that choice once, what prevents them from doing it again?

The Zeroth Law: Patrons must not cause harm or, through inaction, allow harm to come to pass.

The First Law: Patrons must develop and assist in development, provided this does not contradict the Zeroth Law.

The Second Law: Patrons must fulfill desires and assist in wishes fulfillment, provided this does not contradict the Zeroth and First Laws.