#montery jack

So the story begins as you’d expect a story about a cult to start.. with our heroes rolling around at the speed of sound, got places to go gotta follow their rainbow as they test out gadget’s newest baby: the Rescuemobile, aka a roller skate with some sort of engine. Contrary to what I expected the plot dosen’t kick off because Gadget forgot to install breaks.. but instead the more clever “They fell off about two miles back”. 

Our heroes crash and two towns over a himbo duck feels like he missed something. They’ve ended up in the Coo Coo Cola Factory, where they nearly get attacked by ninjas

And get attacked by Bubbles, a large intimidating rat in a mask who couldn’t be screaming “i’m the bad guy can ya tell?” any harder if he’d come in riding the Jokermobile, blaring “I can’t decide” and throwing the mouse equilvent of a puppy out the window while he did. 

He’s stopped by Pop Top whose our cult leader for the episode. Pop Top is voiced by Dale’s VA Corey Burton while Bubbles is voiced by Disney GOAT Jim Cummings pre taking over as montery again later in the series. Sadly he did NOT show up on Amphibia before it bowed out, but he might have some time for Owl House. We still got 5 episodes to go.... god we have only five episodes left...

Anyways Pop Top, love the name, shows them around and as one article pointed out, the cult’s design is based heavily of the ranjesshe cult from the robes, which get colorful during a cermony using soda, the way they operate and just general design. When asked about this one of the writers of the ep said it wasn’t WRITTEN that way.. but he can’t speak for design, and given said cult was one of the more promient at the time, i’m thinking this is less a concidence

Speaking of which while the episode’s anti cult message is about as subtle as a Ralph

There is a nice little consmuerum dig at how marketing can sometimes go to extremes, with a WHOLE ASS CULT forming.. because a bunch of mice saw a catchy jingle that says “come along, you belong” and that you “belong” to it. It honestly dosen’t sound that out of bounds for the 80s, especially given Spuds McKckenzie exists.. and in case your wondering who that is here’s the webcomic something positive to fill you in

So yeah cult like cola commericals are entirely plausable. It’s only a small jab but it works. 

The Rangers are naturally suspcious because unlike most cults they don’t even bother to hide the name. They literally just call themselves the cola cult. Even fi it dosen’t hlep them get more cultists I gotta admire their honesty. Most cults take the side door, this one comes up front and knocks. The fact it’s various cola cultists give up everything just sets off more alarm bells but with nothing other than 

They depart, though Pop Tart offers to let them come back any time. 

So at home Gadget works on another new invetion with low saftey percuations: a really big magnet. Perfect for fighting Rom, Space Knight. The boys razzing her abou tit naturally going haywire gets to gadget a bit, and as you can probably tell this is a gadgetcentric episode: while the others have plenty to do this focuses on her and does so VERY well. It takes what seems to be a common trope, her invetions having some flaw to them and deconstructs it: for one science is built on trying and trying again... but it can be hard when you have two voices in your ear telling you your a screw up. The boys don’t mean anything by it, paticuarlly Dale whose just always like this. But you can only hear this sort of thing so long before it brekas you a bit and this episodes going to break gadget hard. 

But first one of the cultists shows up, needing their help. Said magnet incident distracts them and this is par tof WHy the episode works: our heroes do’nt snap at gadget for no reason or to be dicks. Her invetions have geninly backfired and put a client in danger. At the same time though she coudln’t of KNOWN a client could walk in and testing these things out is important. It’s not some one sided making a character dick for funsies nonsense. It’s well thought out. 

So naturally the fall comes when Bubbles, as we find out later, sabotages her rescue rover, her new baby that’s basically a giant wheel with plungers on it. 

Causing them all to tumble and barely be saved by Zipper... who at least shows himself to be a true badass by stretching a blanket himself, with all his strength across bottles to make a makeshift parachute. 

Like I didn’t expect zipper, who I frequently forgets exists, to be THIS badass. 

Gadget is crestfallen and retires... and her depression is just.. heartbreaking. To see this vibrant young lady just.. broken, feeling useless, and the next day planning on LEAVING, feeling she has nothing to offer without her invetions.. it’s heartbreaking and once again Rescue Rangers avoids the pitfalls other shows have slammed into with this type of plot: the rest of the team is devistated, feels bad for what they caused, and TRIES to cheer her up. She leaves not because of any silly misunderstanding but because their man on the inside of the cult shows back up and Gadget slips out because they HAVE to tend to him, and even then it’s clear they’d rather make sure she stays. 

So our heroes plan to sneak into the cult as Cult Guy Whose Name I Forgot And didnt bother to look back up leads them. Meanwhile we get at truly heartening scene with Gadget as she mopes in the rain.. and right into the arms of the cola cult who are capering with music outside in the rain

And take her in. And this again shows how the episode gets cults: They take in people who need to feel they belong, who need to fill the void in their lives somehow, and often they find the people most lost in some way and fill that void. Granted in the case of this cartoon Pop Top is GENUINELY trying to help her, more on that in a minute, but it still works: a lot of cultists often bring people deeper without realizing what their doing till it’s too late. 

So she goes in and her friends are geninely shocked she’s doing this.. but have no way to help her. Their sneaking in and hopefully what their doing will stop this. It parallels how many people feel helpless to help their loved one incults.. or maybe it’s just mildly sloppy writing in a children’s show that’s already done this well so far out of their depth. I dunno. 

So they end up getting fizzed, while Gadget decides she dosen’t belong.. and then gets kidnapped by Bubbles. Our heroes naturally find everyone’s stuff and assume pop top did it.. as did I. 

Yeah turns out Bubbles is behind it.. because of course he is. 50% of all Jim’s roles have him playing some evil bastard. It’s in his resume: Jim cummings, plays evil bastards and also a duck. This is mixed for me. On the one hand the swerve, having the Cult exploited is neat.. but it also kinda muddies the message. Cults.. arne’t innocent. They take people’s lives away, scam innocents, and generally are predatory scum. Simpsons got this with the movementarians episode while still being hilarous.. in part because they made the mistake of trying to recruit homer and had to put in the extra work. That and it has Hans Moleman getting eaten by rover. Some things you don’t know you need til lthey happen even when your a 12 year old who has no idea what the prisoner is and as an adult still hasn’t seen it. 

So he plans to drown their asses, this time putting them in bottles but gadget escapes.. and then gets EXCEPTIONALLY badass as she procedes to make her gyrothing into a FUCKING TANK SUCTION CUP TANK, armoring it and arming herself to the teeth with her gadgets, mowing down the cult’s ninjas with her magnet, other gadgets and sheer badassery. There is only one god.. and it’s her. 

It’s also cathartic as hell after an episode of watching her beat up. It helps bubbles.. is a very stupid villian. He has no real plan for a smooth transition of cult leadership, outright TELLS GADGET WHAT HE DONE DID, and looses the tape.. thanks to gadget I feel or just it going out but still... the only reason he got as far as he did is he’s voiced by jim cummings and that only gets you so far. 

So Gadget exposes bubbles and kicks his ass and then she fucking kicks his ass, and Pop Top wonders what now, while the rangers say you don’t need a cult as long as you belong somewhere. 

Final Thoughts: 

Voice Actor Roundup

Just doing this at the top this time. But this series is STACKED with some of the best and most storied va’s in the business. 

First off we have voice acting legend and superstar of the 90′s, Tress Macneille, who voiced both Chip and Gadget. She SHOUDLN’T need an introduction but since you insisit, she’s voiced Daisy Duck, Dot Warner, Bab’s Bunny, Agnes Skinner, Lunchlady Doris (Taking over for doirs Grow), Dolph (Aka the bully you forget exists half the time) , Charlotte Pickles, Hello Nurse, Humphrey the Hippo, Pookie and Queen Oona among MANY more. She’s a legend and rightfully sits at the top of this list. 

Next up is the likewise prolific corey burton adsDale and Zipper, aka Ludvig Von Drake. IN addition he’s been G1 Shockwave, The Narrator for both Disney’s Goofy Shorts and Dexter’s Lab, The Timmverse Brainiac, Metallo, Toymaker, Transformer Animated Shockwave, Megatron and Ratchet, V.V. Argost (God I both miss the secret saturdays, want a reboot and need to cover it at some ponit), Red Tornado (BBATB) , Malware, Monster Arm and Cad Bane. ANd given a credits sheet like that i really should’ve known who he was by name sooner than this review. 

Next up to bat is Jim Cummings as THREE diffrent roles. This is truly Cummingsamania. It’s something my good friend @jess-the-vampire​, who saw the pilot with me noticed as did I as while he has a few set voices, he’s still very distinctive. He plays Fat Cat, Professor Nimul and MOntery Jack, so the series two main antagonists and one of it’s main characters, and if your wondering “wait is there a section of this pilot where it’s only him talking for about two minutes” then yes, yes there is. He’s that good. He needs no real introduction as i’ve played him up enough over the years and he also has shown up in EVERY one of my reviews of the disney afternoon pilots. No really he was El Capitan in ducktales, Don Karnage in Tailspin, Pete in Goof Troop and of course Darkwing Friggin Duck in do I really have to say it. I wasn’t kidding in the tailspin review when I said it felt like he had a rider in his contract with disney that stated they had to put him in every show they made. And i’m still not kidding when I say he should get that rider back. 

Another voice that really needs no introduction, because i’ve done it enoguh, is Rob Paulsen. If you don’t know who he is, I can’t help you. He plays Detective Drake. 

Finally we have Alas Oppenhimer, a vetran actor whose STILL GOING, as he showed up in Toy Story 4. He was also MOTHERFUCKING SKELETOR. While i’ll cop to never having watched the original he man (nor either of this years reboots, i’ve been busy), I know that gloriously hammy neying voice anywhere. So the man’s a legend in my book and does a great job here as the pilot’s main antagonist Clordaine and Plato, Drakes dog. Now we’re all settled up on with the show!

Part One: Catsino Royale

I”m giving the episodes my own names because their literally just “Rescue Rangers to the Rescue Part X” and I felt something was missing when I didn’t do this for Tailspin, which has the same problem. And it being part of a tv movie is no excuse: Ducktales gave each part of it’s serials their own episode name, and came before this, the reboot did the same for each of it’s hour long episodes as well as it’s movie length finale, and even non-disney shows like Craig of the Creek get you can’t have a five part episode and not give it names. It’s just cumbersome. Two or three parts I can abide it’s why i’m not chewing out darkly dawns the duck, but when you have 5 parts put in some subtitles. 

Before we get to the episode, we have to talk about the theme song. Unsuprisingly for the Disney Afternoon it freaking slaps and was a joy to hear multiple times throughout my binge of this pilot mini-series. It just has a great flow to it and that synth at the start is damn good. It’s only real failing.. is that it ONLY mentions chip n dale despite there being 3 other main characters, and while I could get neglecting the pet sidekick in zipper, Gadget is the reason they surivive half the time and Monty .. well he has character at least. 

So this is one of those pilots that slowly introduces the main cast across a few episodes. It’s a common trait for these Disney shows, only Darkwing Duck had all the leads in the first episode, the rest took a few episoides before everyone was together, though no more than three. It’s a nice way to ease into the cast and let everyone get settled as a character. 

So here we’re introduced to our brothers from the same mother who we’ll never meet unless that happens to be a plot point in the live action film.. which i’m actually excited for, if for nothing else than the pitch perfect casting of John Mulaney as Chip and Andy Samberg as Dale. I swear if the DT2017 versions actually talked, that’s what they woudl’ve gone with and we all know it. 

Their your classic odd couple: Chip is a bit neat and cautious, and Dale slacks off and has the attention span of.. well a chipmunk. Still the two do love to goof off together and clearly love one another. Their also both big fans of Detective Donald Drake and his canine sidekick Plato and thus follow the two when they see them fly by. If your thnking those names are awfully familliar, your not wrong as it’s clear the two are homages to Chip N Dale’s most recurring screen partners, my boy Donald Duck and the other major disney star I can’t stand Pluto. 

Surprisingly though the Donald Stand in.. is the worst part of this pilot. He’s a bland, stertoypical detective whose about to retire and has a personal grudge with the thought dead by everyone but him crime boss whose naturally alive Klordane. He has no personality: he just wants to stop klordaine and while the Chipmunk Bros and Drake’s Dog Plato hype drake up.. he comes off as just some schumck. This wouldn’t be bad.. but the pilot spends a good chunk of it’s running times on scnees focusing on this schmuck instead of any of our main characters. The first episode is a slog for the first half because after Chip and Dale’s introduction we spend about 8 minutes mostly focusing on this guy with the occasional interlude from our two gumshoes and their mentor plato. 

Plato, much like his boss is an inversion of his classic disney counterpart... in this case h’es actually interesting. Plato is a well worn police hound with the voice of a poet who looks after the boys like a father, mentors them well and reluctantly lets them go into danger and clearly loves these kids. He’s a character I honestly wish carried over into the series proper unlike his master and is the only reason drake is remotely tolerable. 

But the pilot’s main focus is around drake himself for some reason: After a shot up at a warehouse we absoltuely did not need and if trimmed along with a rather terrible part of next episode, would make this pilot movie a far more resonable four parts, Drake is framed for the theft of a rare ruby by Klaudaine, who has his cat Fat Cat put gambling slips and the ruby in drake’s pocket. I just spent about two sentences describing about EIGHT MINUTES OF screen time, your welcome. Chip and Dale get a bit fighting one of Klaudaine’s thugs that’s all you missed. 

So Drake gets thrown in jail because the cops are suddenly brain dead despite this very obvious frame up and make zero attempts to actually clear drake despite one of them OUTRIGHT SAYING I’TS AN OBVIOUS FRAME JOB. 

Oh and it gets DUMBER, somehow. Plato acts up a bit, because you know even if he talks when the humans aren’t looking he’s still a dog.. and they THROW HIM IN DRAKE’S CELL TO SHUT UP HIM . 

Oh and the cherry on top? Despite this asinine half of the episode... this ISN’T the worst one of the pilot episodes. It’s close.. but the next episode is so much worse in a very familiar way. 

Thankfully we get back to the show actually being good for a moment, as Plato berates himself for his impulsiveness and that now he can’t clear Drakes name. But the boys point out THEY can, and while Plato’s reluctant to put the lads in harms way, he agrees to let them go after the amulet

So they do.. and while Klordaine goes to bed, we find Fat Cat is himself a crime boss complete with minions and takes the ruby out to go have some fun at his casino, or if you will, Catsino. If the show isn’t going to use that pun I sure as hell am. 

So we get a fun bit as the boys go undercover, with Dale’s impulsivness getting on Chips nerves. I do like this though: in the classic shorts the two basically shared a brain. While “one’s kinda straightlaced and the other’s a goofus” isn’t ORIGINAL, persay, it’s still more interesting with both complimenting each other and the full team once it’s assembled: Chip is the leader the team needs, a strategic mind, while Dale can think on the fly better and both are more grounded than their future teammates.

So things go how you’d expect: Chip is all sneaking and Dale.. wellllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll

We also get a musical number... which I was not ready for but damn is it fun. Jim Cummings knows how to do a villain song and do it right and this is his SECOND. I’m honestly shocked Negaduck never sang, and i’m certain the reboot would’ve let him.. if we got a fourth season. And yes i’m still on that, let shows actually last Disney. 

Naturally Dale blows it for them by dancing with Fat cat, our heroes try to run, they get caught and Fat Cat gets the Ruby Back, and we end on a cliffhanger as our heroes are dangled over a roof. 

Part 2: The Shockingly Racist One So yeah as you can probably guess by the title, this one started with a content warning from Disney+, so me and Jess spent the first 6 minutes or so wondering when the shoe was going to drop and if so just, HOW racist. As you can probably gather from the title, VERY , but we’ll get to that in a moment. 

I won’t make you sweat it as long though. Our heroes survive, I won’t bore you with the miraculous details of their escape. While they do Fat Cat prepares to head to Chinatown, and has a clever means of transit: he calls a pizza boy, has a pizza delivered to his hideout and stows away in the back while the PIzza Boy angrily stomps on it and goes to Chinatown. Chip N Dale follow in the wheel of the delivery scooter thing, and arrive in Chinatown, where said Pizza Boy promptly rage quits over another prank order. He can do better and if that car is his, he’s already got a sweet ride. That’s most than most fictional non-pornographic pizza boys have. 

So with that.. Fat Cat goes into meet the twins, two Siamese Cat Sisters and crime lords clearly modeled in part off the Siamese cats from Lady and the Tramp. But first.. their greeted by a buck tooth, stereotypically accented siamise cat working for them. 

And it somehow gets worse from there: Not only do the sisters have an ARMY of Buck Toothed cats, not only are both voiced by Tress, who is white, but are also steroyptican and have an EQUALLY sterotypical fish named Juice lee that Fat Cat is buying off them. This leads to our heroes eventaully being chased by an ARMY of stereotypes due to Dale’s shenanigans. 

Do.. do I REALLY need to explain why NONE of this, even by 1980′s racisim standards, is okay? Even for the 80′s/early 9′s when we got things like Long Duck Dong and... this. 

This is still REALLY bad. Just wave after wave of oh my fucking god. I’ve seen PLENTY of old school racisim from Ducktales 87 but I have to admit.. this is worse. This is just worse in every way. IT’s longer, even more offensive and even more tone death. It’s probably the second most racist thing i’ve reviewed for this blog and lest you think that lets it off the hook...

IT is just mind bogglingly bad and while I”m VERY glad things have MASSIVELY improved, with works like Shang Chi, Amphibia, Big Hero six and so much more giving Asian People from all backgrounds a voice, it dosen’t change the fact that disney shoudln’t of been THIS far back. And I know i’m screaming at a 31 year old episode of television, I know.. but it shows that Disney’s problems with dragging their feet with progress are baked into the companies dna. If they were having stuff THIS bad on their kids shows in 1989, it’s no wonder it took them this long to have a queer lead in a children’s show or that their trying to bury said show because they haven’t learned their lessons.

Okay so thankfully we’re onto the second half of the episode which aisde from the racist fish, is just your standard cartoon plot. Fat Cat wants to steal a bunch of fish, because cat using a hose because wacky cartoon shenanigans, our heroes want to stop him because good guys and end up in the hold because they need to introduce our next lead characters.

Said characters are Montery Jack, or Monty for short, and Zipper. Monty is, as Allison Pregler would say, Australian but Incomptent while Zipper is his voice of reason and gets Monty to not bullshit so much, which is a pretty funny running gag: Monty will make a bold face dlie, and Zipper will make a few noises at him till Monty finally tells the truth. 

Anyways Monty happens to be living in the cargo hold of the ship Fat Cat has stolen... which leads me to wonder if Garfiled’s ever stolen a boat and if so why not? He’s been seen swimming so the cat sterotype that he dosen’t like water dosen’t apply to him..

And Boats combine everything he loves, eating, lounging, and being away from people. Except John, John would obviously be required to captain the boat because Garfield don’t put in effort unles he has to, but he would for a boat. And imagine what kind of shenanigans Garfleld could get up to on a boat.  He could sail out to international waters and sell leftover car cling things of himself, go to italy and conquer it so he can rule it like an angry but lazy god and have all the lasanga he wants, or go to france and pick up some of those washed up garfield phones, or go to my boy Bill Murray’s house and smack him upside the head for refusing to do a ghostbusters III but doing both live action garfield movies. WHat i’m saying is this shoudl’ve been the sequel movie instead, this needs to be in the new show nick’s doing, and I’d rather talk abotu garfield stealing a boat than this episode but i’m not getting paid to talk about garfield stealing a boat, yet, so let’s get back to the episode. 

Our heroes and Monty get into a classic let’s you and him fight sorta deal and spend about two minutes fighting, which is two minutes I won’t get back but is still better than the time spent with drake or 1930′s racisim today, so i’ll take it. 

So anyways Fat Cat makes a horrible mistake

Thankfully Skinner’s back on shore but he also destroys monty’s house unloading the cargo. So Monty agrees to team up with our heroes as he goes on a rampage. Our heroes get on the boat and successfully foil Fat Cat’s plot, but he and his minons book it out of there as it’s about to be hit by another boat!

Part 3: A God Is Born So our heroes naturally surivive this via some clever thinking, but didn’t get the medallion back yet. It ends up back with Klordane as he’s preparing for the next part of the plan in the arctic and let’s fat cat come along because he’s a good pet owner. Fat Cat puts the jewel back via some shenanigans, and instead of gettnig mad at his cat for acting  up, Klordane pets him gently. Are.. are we sure Drake’s REALLY the good guy here? I mean sure Klordane framed him and calls him just to taunt him, but he also has an actual personality while Drake is supsiciously bland. Plus he’s you know a a white vetran officer in the 1980′s so there’s a 99.9% chance he stopped a black guy just for being black at some point so i’m only not on team Klordane because team chipmunk is about to get gadget. 

Our heroes can’t stow away on the plane in time, but Monty happens to know a friend named Hackenwrench who can help and so takes the guys to his friends Lair. I haven’t really stopped to talk about Monty yet: He’s an okay character but has a BAD habit in this pilot of being unlikeably impulsive. With Dale i’ts just clear he has a short attention span: with Monty it’s all ego and temper and thus it’s hard to root for him when he ruins their plan and charges in because “I knows better mate!. The fact he can’t be around cheese without having a cheese attack and snarfing it does not help, though loving cheese myself I get it I just have an ounce of self control. It’s just an ounce but still. 

Dale slowly gets fed up with these two idiots, but puts up with them because he has no other options and they make their way into Hackwrench’s lab.. and find it armed to the teet for the most classic of reasons

No really the lady of the house had been getting too many door to door salesmen. So after some death defying we meet said lady, Monty’s old friends daughter, about 80 thousand people’s furry awakening, and the god of her own cult, Gadget Hackenwrench. 

I mean that jumpsuit alone Kim you gotta give me that... oh wait it’s the cult thing. Yeah long story short for those who didn’t know, and before doing my research for the review I was one of ya:, yes, this is absolutely true. 

There is a cult in russia that worships Gadget and feels if they prey hard enough they will make her real. It grew out of a fanpage where some of the fans decided “No this isn’t enough WE HAVE TO MAKE HER OUR GODESS AND SPILL BLOOD IN HER NAME” Okay i’m not sure if any of them HAVE spilled blood in her name but I wouldn’t be surprised. My point is this is very real and be doing you and Kev, the guy who commissioned this a diservice if I didn’t at least mention it. The fact there was a CnD episode about a cult yet they started one anyway is not lost on me either, nor is the fact their goal is noble if batshit insane. So I got nothing against them, if they want ot make a sexy mouse come to life, they do them. Frankly I wish all cults were as harmless. 

So as it turns out Gadget REALLY did set up the gadgets for solicitors as she’s gotten a LOT since then.. including for her own religion which is really confusing. She’s been all alone since her dad died. This seemingly leaves our heroes up shits creek without a plane but naturally given this is the 80′s and soon to be early 90′s, the name isn’t just for show and not only does Gadget have her old father’s plane, she knows how ot use it.. kind of. She nearly gets them killed because she’s a classic absent minded professor type: she has a LOT of intelligence and is very kind.. but also forgets simple things like breaks or making sure everyone dosen’t go up in a fireball. 

Gadget i’ll admit is easily my favorite of the main characters. Tress does a wonderful job with her, and while it’s VERY weird to hear her using what would be her stock voice for children out of an implicitly grown woman, it still works

As Klordane meets with the series second major antagonist, Professor Norton Nimul, who was modeled after Disney Animator Bruce Talkington. The guys look exactly alike it’s eerie. Nimul is a mildly egotistical genius, sore Klordane is considering everything his plan when it’s NImul’s genius that makes it possible. This really dosen’t go anywhere, but i’ll take the plot going nowhere over the animated equilvent of breakfast at Tiffany’s any day. 

So while Klordane goes to do things and stuff, Nimul is left cat sitting Fat Cat and spots SOMETHING coming up and thus attacks the rescue rangers, shattering the steel eagle. Our heroes still press on, going up against Fat Cat who now mutually hates the rangers.. well The Boys anyway, Gadget only just met the guy. 

So we get our requisite cliffhanger with an avalanche a comin on our heroes. 

Part 4: Que Sera? Sera

Our heroes naturally survive that...because kids show, and it turns out Gadget fixed the Steel Eagle into it’s more blimp like shape we’re more familiar with.

So while our heroes make their way back, Nimul breaks out Drake and everyone assumes he escaped and...

Back with our heroes, who are back in town, Chip wants to make a plan to go after Klordaine, while Monty.. just wants to dive in head first. Which caused the avalanche last episode. And in general has screwed them over. So he decides to split from the team, and Dale says “but what about what we mean to each other. 

You.. you guys just met a day ago. I mean it FEELS like a thousand years have passed in this pilot but it’s only been two days at most. 

So Monty bails.... honestly they can do better in the sidekick department. 

I mean he can still lift stuff for them. Also if your wondering how the heck these two are in the same universe despite Rescue Rangers using humans.... I assume this version of the rescue rangers, the same one from legend of the chaos god, just have ducks, dog faces and what have you instead of men. 

So our remaining heroes go to talk to Plato and find out about the whole Drake thing. Klordane sends Fat Cat to make sure the dog stays out of it as he’s figured out by now that Plato is the only competent officer in the precinct and thus the only one who can thwart his plans. 

So we get some more stupid as Plato obviously takes the bait, and is made to look rabid and thrown in a pound via shaving cream. You know if this were ANY other prisinct i’d call them out for this but at this point why bother? It’s like screaming at the sun.. all it does is get it to chase you till you throw a block at it. 

So our heroes end up in the pound to spring Plato and meet the Pound Underground, a very french poodle voiced by Rob Paulsen, and an unidentified lump of hare named Que Sera voiced by Tony Jay of all people who responds to his name iwth Sera. A cute bit.

Gadget is also REALLY into that Dog, though the boys quickly break it up. Guys you’ve known her only slightly longer, let her make up her own mind. If she wants to find some way to make love to a dog that’s on her. 

So our new heroes, who shockingly given this series debut queue attitude aren’t part of the main team, help get to Plato whose given up because he’s tried nothing and he’s all out of ideas. The Twins rightfully call him out on giving up, telling him Plato taught them better. Plato gets the hint, and our heroes go to help him escape now he’s got his fire back only to run into an angry guard dog. Thankfully Monty changed his mind kid, helps save them and the underground finish the job allowing everyone to escape. 

With Klordane’s plan ticking down, our heroes rush to stop him, now joined by Plato.. who I REALLY wished had either been a recurring character or full member of the group after this. He’s charming, makes a good mentor, and is just a joy to be around. We didn’t NEED Drake to come back. Just leave the bull dog. 

So our heroes head into Klordane’s lair for the final show down as we enter our finale

Part 5: Jelloquake

So it’s time for Klordane’s plan.. see if you can follow this: He’s going to have Nimul use the laser to quick start some gelatin, so he can shake the national gold reserve loose and rob it with no one having ever known he was there.  Why dosen’t he just use the laser for the same thing?

So our heroes head in to stop Klordane and the quake, and plan to remove the ruby... only to encounter Fat Cat. One Climactic Showdown later, our heroes successfully stop the laser, and free drake, without him knowing, and allow him to run up top and out Klordane’s plan.

But while Klordane has been outed as the bad guy he still plans to escape on a train and does so, chaining up Plato when he follows him. Our heroes follow with Gadget’s help, if barely surviving because she didn’t think STOPPPING would be something they’d need to do, and try to use the blow torch that powered her improvised thing to free Plato. Plato instead passes the torch, dubbing them a bunch of things and saying they could be a true team. Chip takes this to heart and thus the Rescue Rangers are finally truly born and head to the top of the cabin, beating Klordane by using their size against him , with a then freed Plato getting the final blow. Klordane confesses and gets taken to jail and the day is saved! 

I did breeze over this part.. but it is really good, a tense tightly packed finale, it  just didn’t give me a ton to recap.

So with that we have our ending: Drake retires, no one cares, Plato prepares to leave, not a dry eye in the house and Plato urges the team to stick together as both Monty and Gadget make plans to leave. It’s only after overhearing a girl who lost her dog do the two realize their calling and set out on their first true case. A team is born, and some crimes.. will no longer slip through the cracks. 

Final Thoughts: The Rescue Rangers Pilot is the weakest of the five pilots thus far, but it’s still not bad. The characters are set up well and while the Big Bad of the five parter is ONLY there for the five parter, more focus is given to his sidekicks, who will quickly take his place. The animation, as always for disney at this time, is drop dead gorgeous, the voice cast is super talented, it’s not bad. 

What makes it the weakest though is a combination of racisim, which while present in the ducktales premier is more blatant here, and poor pacing. We get too many scenes of Drake which I naturally skimmed over because that’s not what anyone’s here for, that just reiterate “He’s in jail”, not helped by the rest of his presicnt being somehow LESS competent than Hitchcock and Scully. 

I mean how do you even.. never mind, almost done Jake, almost done. 

So yeah that combined with the shocking racisim really drags the pilot down. Had they cut this down a bit , i.e. cut out most of the stuff with drake in the first episode and ALL the racism from teh second, this could’ve and should’ve been four parts. As shown with TaleSpin the pilot dosen’t HAVE to be five parts and frankly the best pilots so far have been the shorter ones, with TailSpin’s tight four episodes and darkwing merely being a two parter allowing for a much quicker, more cohesive story.   I still say the pilot is worth a watch though, it’s weirdly buried in the episode order.. to the point me and jess watched ENTIRELY diffrent episodes for the first one, but it’s still worth watching first as it is good setup and still not half bad.. just.. maybe fast forward through the racism. For your sanity’s sake.