#modern!witcher

Witcher au I made with friends where geralt is a twitch streamer and jaskier is an influencer on yt and anonymously donates insane amounts of money to geralts streams to flirt with him

We went very in depth over this joke au

Part 2 I guess: https://unlit-candle.tumblr.com/post/636642019722362880/im-tired-of-being-nice

Ok so jaskier gets bored after centuries of only singing to Geralt or any of the other immortals and decides "fuck it, I wanna be famous" so with his talent he quickly and easily becomes a famous singer/songwriter and I desperately want the reactions from the other witchers that don't live with him and Geralt because "fuck. It's the 13th century all over again and they can't escape the bards fucking songs".

...only it’s really Supernatural in disguise.

Geralt’s just a hunter, who’s been around the block a few times, and is actually equipped to do the job with mutagens etc. He and the other Witchers have their home base in Kaer Morhen, similar to the Men of Letters bunker type building except with less secret society vibes and more ancient warrior order vibes.

That would mean there’s at least two branches of Hunters out there; the kind made, like Geralt, and the kind who form from a dark revenge driven side, like the Winchesters.

Jaskier’s probably the most annoying Trickster Geralt’s ever had the displeasure of meeting. Especially because his face is that of a Superstar Celebrity. (Gabriel loves his chaotic underling)

Lambert and Dean Winchester had a drunken one-night stand, and now they both hate each other. Of course, they hated each other before that, the alcohol just provided them an outlet. (They totally get into a fist fight every time they encounter one another, though)

Eskel and Sam regularly talk through the monster hunter forums for updates. Eskel has spent the last fifty years digitizing half of Kaer Morhen’s books to spread information. They’ve never met.

Bobby and Vesemir know of each other. Bobby can’t believe Vesemir puts up with Geralt’s antics -they don’t talk about Lambert. Vesemir can’t believe Bobby puts up with Sam’s antics -they don’t talk about Dean.

Castiel, however, is the only angel the Witchers have ever met.

Dean would much rather see Yennefer in a grave than be within fifty feet of her. Yennefer would like to see him try.

Modern!au where they all teach in The Wolves Highschool and:

Vesemir is the grumpy headmaster who will kick your ass if you do not say ‘hello’ to one of the teachers but also gonna give you a cookie when you’re sad;

Eskel is an English teacher cause he loves poetry and everyone loves his lessons, he tends to read aloud some books during classes and his voice is lovely;

Lambert is a beloved coach of the school team and also the best PE teacher, he encourages his students, helps them if they have some troubles with running, swimming, sport in general;

Yennefer is this scary chemistry teacher who will do a huge explosion to teach those bastards something but also a really kind one who will give you some acid to get your revenge;

Triss is a biology teacher who loves plants and force every student to have their own flowers, loves to go out with her pupils to watch the animals and can spend hours on talking about birds;

And Geralt is a history teacher who everyone is afraid of but also - every student loves him cause when he begins to talk you can see this passion in his golden eyes.

Jaskier is a new music teacher and at first he’s fucking terrified. During his first days he really tries to be calm and quiet but this doesn’t last long. He just cannot stop himself when one of his students ask him why does he like music so much.

He begins his story and of course, because he’s Jaskier, he does it while singing. He hasn’t singed before because he was afraid that someone will recognise him.

Cause little did they know - Julian Pankratz was a famous musician Jaskier the Viscount of Lettenhove, whose face is unknown. Because his music videos are only lyrics vidoes, you can only hear his voice. And no one knows his alter ego.

But he does it - he sings about his history with music and everyone immediately fell in love with his soft, calming voice. Everyone is charmed and wants to listen more. His students begs him to sing something more and he promises that during every lesson he will sing one song - even of their choice.

But what he didn’t know was the fact that one of his students - Ciri - fell so in love with his voice, and him in general (not in a romantic way, like teacher-student) that he speaks for hours at home about him.

And of course Geralt begins to pay more attention than before to this new, vigorous and handsome teacher. But he’s doing it only because his daughter can’t shut up about Jaskier.

Only because of that.

Geralt with an undercut and a manbun.

Also,, color is a thing??