Jul 4
Not gonna lie, I fw Kerdly a whole lot. And he/they Berdly too. I really like he/they Berdly.
Loading...
seen from China
seen from T1
seen from United States
seen from China
seen from Malaysia
seen from Australia
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Netherlands
seen from United States
seen from China
seen from Türkiye
seen from Iraq
seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
seen from Türkiye
seen from Guatemala
seen from Algeria
seen from China
seen from Nicaragua
Not gonna lie, I fw Kerdly a whole lot. And he/they Berdly too. I really like he/they Berdly.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
That moment when I'm happily writing a fanfic and then I go on Pinterest to see content of this fandom and—
OH NO! I'm suddenly terrified that I mischaracterized them horribly!
UH OH! I hopped on Spotify to listen to the cast album and the way I write in this character's POV might not be accurate to the lyricism in their songs!
YIKES! I'm rewatching/rereading/whatever the media and I think "Holy shit, the fanfic I was happily writing earlier is so fucking cringe! What do I do now?"
Hop on Ao3. Read all the fanfics of that fandom that have the same concept/writing style of my fanfic. It makes me feel better instantly because idk why, but I get hope from seeing other writers write like I do, since it's like I'm doing SOMETHING right
Post-SQUIP Jeremy is semi-verbal leaning on nonverbal. He speaks in his mind most of the time. He can't exactly tell which thoughts are his and which are the SQUIP's, despite the fact it's gone. He disassociates to the point he forgets parts of his day, or the whole of it. He forgets to reply to people. Maybe he thinks he replies to them, except he's not sure if he did, because parts of his memory have been tampered with and he doesn't know what is real and what isn't, even though it's gone. His own brain replaced the SQUIP. He's been so used to its treatment that he adjusted to become its replacement.
His senses are way more heightened than they're supposed to be. Or maybe that's how it's always been, way before the SQUIP fixed helped him. Maybe his clothes have always felt too suffocating and itchy, and maybe he needed new glasses in the first place. Perched on his nose, too light. Too heavy. Too wrong. Too right. Too normal. Too weird.
It's made perfectly for him. He's perfectly himself. He hates it.
Jeremy hates the SQUIP. Jeremy hates that the SQUIP left. Jeremy is scared of the SQUIP. Jeremy is scared that he'll mess things up, now that the SQUIP is gone. Jeremy is scared that it'll come back, and things will go wrong again. Jeremy is glad and is sad and is disgusted and is relieved and is confused about the fact he's Jeremy again. Jeremy is Jeremy. He's human. He's himself. He's making his own decisions and trying his best.
He hates it and he loves it. He doesn't miss the SQUIP. But he misses the familiarity. So he reverts. He regresses. Just so he can feel comfortable. Not safe, because that's not what safe feels like, but he's in his zone, and that's okay for him.
The only two IRL friends I have that know of the existence + actively crave BMC are. Hm. Let's just say they ship Squipemy. Which isn't exactly a problem, because that's they're choice, but it's kind of awkward how whenever I mention Jeremy and the SQUIP in a convo, they're gonna be like "Jeremy x SQUIP mmmm" LIKE PLEASE ENOUGH 😭😭🏵️ I just wanna yap about the discomfort in himself that was brought up on Jeremy, and not about the possibly romantic [or even SEXUAL apparently] relationship he may have with his digital mind parasite........
I like using 🎢🌅 as my RTC emoji combo because:
Rollercoaster. Obviously. And the sunrise/sunset/whatever emoji? Well. Let's just say... Somewhere sunrise begins another day
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
I see Noel Gruber as a he/she who doesn't like they. I'm not sure why. It's just a feeling. A vibe, even
Sorri, Chloe Valentine, but I do not like you :[[
I like to think that the imaginary SQUIP that I consumed is the cause of all of my intrusive thoughts. Like, this random thing in my head would go "You're stupid and you won't get anywhere in life" and I'll be like "man you should learn to deactivate yourself sometime"