#micrcosmos

[THEME MUSIC FADES IN] ANNOUNCER Futuristic Trail Mix Productions presents Micro-Cosmos: A Science Fiction Podcast. [THEME MUSIC FADES OUT] [sfx: button press] ATHENA Hey, HQ. It's Officer Athena Romero, with Crew #0137-F. I'm transmitting from... North 54 degrees, West 109 degrees, in a moment of alone time. Camp's not too far, I just... wanted to come out here to record. We were up so, so early, but we made really good time getting our travel in for the day. And... I don't know. I felt like being introspective. I know that's rarely a good thing to be, for people of our situation... but sometimes it can't be helped, I guess. We're nearing what Doctor Couvillion calls the temperate forest region of the planet. Oh, uh, Felix is... fine, by the way, in case you were wondering. I know I haven't talked about him a lot for the last week since his little run in with Mercutio, and in hindsight, that was probably a little alarming from your perspective. But, no. He's, um... just been very focused on his work. Ever since our encounter with that little... strange... cat lizard dinosaur thing, he's taken to a pretty enthusiastic approach of figuring out what it actually is. You know, what is eats, how it behaves, it's characteristics. Thus, he's not been his usual social self, but he's had what I guess you'd call a breakthrough. He's named it. The species, I mean. Varanus concolor. Apparently he's determined that it's a new species of monitor lizard. Exciting stuff. Miles and Cal have been sorta... tense, the last little bit? I don't know if Miles is still mad at them about that terrible, terrible prank or just for being, you know, Cal. I like Cal. And Miles. Honestly, I do. I think they're almost a little too similar to get along sometimes. I get that. I've been in the same spot for most of my life. I only recently figured out how to sort of... stop taking my own reflection personally. [sfx: fingers drumming on comms, pacing footsteps] ATHENA (CONT’D) Alex is good! If you're wondering. You know, morale and all. We've been talking a lot, since we're sort of the only ones not in our own world. Well, I guess we're all in our own world, that's sort of our job, but... 

[Athena laughs.] ATHENA (CONT’D) Literal humour, Athena. Good one. Anyways, she's nice to talk to. Leadership skills to boot, in case you didn't already know and needed someone to sing her praises. I think I'd be more than willing to sing her praises. So... the mission's going very well. Everyone is healthy and accounted for, and we're absolutely on track to get to our shipment drop-off point. Comms and tech and climate are all nominal. We're okay. We're okay.

[sfx: bag shuffling as she picks it up, footsteps] ATHENA (CONT'D) Oh, by the way, before I head back. It's my birthday. I don't know if that's something I should mention. Just thought... I don't know. I don't expect the others to notice, or even know at all, really. But it's nice to acknowledge another year, you know? I'm certainly not spending it where I would've expected to be if you had asked me on my previous... thirty birthdays. Anyways. Yes, it is my birthday, and I kind of miss home, and also I kind of don't, and also being here is present enough. So, I will celebrate by breaking open some of the candy in my bag, and getting some sleep- FELIX, ALEX SURPRISE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! [Athena laughs.] ATHENA Guys! What are you doing?

ALEX Oh, come on Romero. You didn't really think you were going to get it past us, did you?

ATHENA No, I wasn't meaning to-

ALEX Oh, don't bother backtracking. You're busted.

FELIX There's no real party, or, presents, or... anything that would make this a proper birthday because of our circumstance, of course, but...

ALEX But an ambush was the least we could do.

FELIX The Commander and I only found out when she was conversing with Cal, inquiring of the database today's points of interest, or else we would've...

ALEX Done more than an ambush.Alex observes Athena, who's just standing there, staring at the two of them and grinning. But, I don't know. Seems like the ambush worked out pretty well. Try to smile less, huh?

ATHENA Heh. I, I mean... this is really sweet of you guys, I appreciate it.

MILES Appreciate what?

[sfx: footsteps, tapping on a screen] [C41′s JINGLE PLAYS] ATHENA Oh, uh, hey Miles!

MILES Heeey Athena, guys. What's up?

FELIX Did we...?

ALEX Nope.

FELIX So we forgot to...?

ALEX Yep.

FELIX Dammit.

ALEX Well, when you assume...

C41 Oh, um! Happy Birthday, Athena!

ATHENA Oh, uh, thank you Cal. Anyways, I was thinking we could get to bed early-

MILES Crap, it's your birthday?

ATHENA ... Yeah.

MILES I am so so sorry, I had no idea, I must have like, missed the memo, but-

ATHENA No, no, Miles, it's okay, I promise. I didn't say anything, and so how would you know? Spending it away from home, I wasn't really sure what to do, it's kind of hard, but...I just got busted by the Commander, so... [The crew laughs nervously.] MILES Happy Birthday.

ATHENA Thanks.

MILES You're welcome. Yeah, uh, actually, Cal and I forgot something back at our setup.

C41 We did?

MILES We did. The thing. We need. We need that thing, Cal, uh... we will be back... later. [sfx: footsteps walking away]

[C41′s JINGLE PLAYS.] FELIX Well, who wants to get this party started and play some cards?

***

MILES Caal! Why didn't you tell me it was Athena's birthday?

C41 I didn't think it was that big of a deal. It's just another day of the year, which... happens to be the day that Athena was born. You can congratulate her on still being alive, like you did, and then move on! Didn't seem that important to me.

MILES Yes, it's a big deal! It's like you said, it's the day someone was born, not just another day. Come on, Cal! Remember when Em and I made a huuuge deal about it on the anniversary that I created you?

C41 By chance, do you mean Doctor Macey? If so, then unfortunately, yes I do remember. It was very loud. If not, I haven't the slightest clue who 'Em' is.

MILES Yes. Her. Doctor Macey.

C41 Okay whatever. Anyways. Do continue on with what you were saying. It's proving to be really entertaining.

MILES Oh, I'll show you entertaining.

How did you not know that birthdays were important? Seriously, there's even a song about them. I taught you better than that.

[Miles sighs.]

MILES Cally, I didn't mean it like-

C41 It's Cal. And no, you're right. Why would something the O Great and Powerful and All-Knowing Miles Abbott made be so inconsiderate and dumb?

MILES Seriously, Cal. I didn't mean it. You know how I get.

C41 Yeah?

Oh, just drop it.

[C41 lets out a long series of scoffs and huffs in the following silence.]

C41 (CONT'D) ... Miles?

Miiiiiiles...?

MILES Caaaal....

Caaaaaaaal.....

C41 Miles- MILES Cal, I need to make Athena a birthday present!

I don't even know what she'd like, let alone what I could make her! There's like, nothing even worthy of being a gift on this planet.

[sfx: Miles snapping.]

MILES (CONT'D) What do I have? What do I even have? What does our camp have? I need to find something. Anything. I'll make it work. Cal, help me look. Please.

[C41 snorts.]

C41 Oh.

Oh, you mean actually help.

[sfx: a buzzing noise of C41′s form]

C41 (CONT'D) Um... well there are some big batteries that Alex didn't need over there, she left them this morning with her equipment. There is a... There is a... it looks like... is that a plastic fork? I really hope that isn't used. You all are a mess. And, um... what's that box, over there? What's that?

[sfx: footsteps, objects being knocked over]

MILES It's, uhhh... Chocolate. And... more chocolate. A gift from Emily, I... forgot I had these.

C41 Huh. A... whole box, huh? Of chocolate? What could you even make with those?

MILES I don't know, okay? I don't even know like, maybe I'm overreacting. Athena didn't tell us because she's not at home, or whatever-

Wait. Cal, what, um, what does Athena's home have?

C41 What?

MILES Where she's from. What's it like?

C41 Patroclus C? Well, it's-

[sfx: a long glitch]

C41 (CONT'D)- Patroclus C. A moon in orbit around more well-known terrestrial body Mirana Dunis. Patroclus-C is known for it's industrial prosperity and plentiful resources, as well as it's freezing conditions.

Notable landmarks include it's few geysers. All imported plant and animal life have adapted to the cold climate, however they take refuge in the steamy geysers that provide both water and heat- MILES Okay, Cal. That's enough, thanks.

[sfx: the same glitch, a zap]

C41 Oh, ouch. Eugh. Why did you let that happen? You know I hate that mode!

MILES I'm sorry! I'm stressing a bit here, if you haven't noticed.

C41 Yes, I'm well aware.

MILES Anyways. I... I think I have a plan.

C41 That's never good.

MILES Let's just hope this turns out. Mmm.... a decent start. ***

FELIX Have any... fives?

ALEX Go fish. [sfx: drawing a playing card].

ALEX (CONT'D) Got any queens?

FELIX Yes, yes. Queen of stars.

ALEX Thank you! Got any threes?

FELIX Go fish.

[sfx: drawing a card]

ALEX So close.

[sfx: approaching footsteps]

FELIX (with his mouth full) Better luck next time. Do you have any-

ALEX Want us to deal you in, Romero?

FELIX Athena? Hm. Cannot believe you were still doing work on your birthday.

ATHENA What's the name of the game?

ALEX Go fish. Do you play?

ATHENA I like to think cribbage is more my forte but... sure. Deal me in.

[sfx: cards shuffling]

ATHENA (CONT'D) Who's winning?

ALEX Me. I've won three matches.

ATHENA And how many has Felix won?

ALEX We've played three matches.

[Alex and Athena laugh.]

FELIX I am beginning to suspect her a cheat.

ALEX Can't help having an eye for this stuff.

ATHENA For what, counting cards?

ALEX I wish. Patterns. Got any kings, Athena?

ATHENA Go fish. Is that technically cheating, then? Patterns?

[sfx: drawing a card]

FELIX I believe I can call it cheating if it makes me feel badly about myself.

ATHENA Fair enough. Felix? Any fours?

FELIX Go fish. See, that felt perfectly fair.

ALEX Doc, I said patterns, not x-ray vision. You keep accusing me of cheating, I'm gonna start to take it personally.

FELIX I harbor suspicion, not accusation. Commander, do you have any aces?

[Alex sighs.]

[sfx: passing cards]

ALEX Dishes and comets. Happy?

FELIX Yes. Athena, do you have any sixes?

ATHENA Yeaaah. Here you go.

[sfx: passing cards, movement of pairs]

ALEX Feeling better about yourself?

FELIX Yes. Very.

ATHENA Jeez, you're already on track to win.

ALEX Felix, should I start repaying you all that whining?

FELIX I-

MILES (distant) DOES ANYONE HAVE JUMPER CABLES?

[sfx: stumbling, approaching footsteps]

FELIX Speaking of.

ALEX Uh... no, I don't think so. Maybe you should ask Cal?

MILES (distant) No. That's okay. I'll use the transport hawser. That should work... just as well if not better. I'll... I'm gonna go get that. Bye.

[sfx: retreating footsteps]

ATHENA That's... that's for... emergencies, what do they need that for-

ALEX My guess? Nothing good.

FELIX Commander, do you have any twos?

ALEX No, but I do have a Petty Officer who needs their marbles back.

[sfx: standing, retreating footsteps]

ATHENA Alex?

ALEX (O.S.) I'll be right back!

FELIX It's her turn, actually. Which one of us should go next?

ATHENA It's my birthday. Got any sevens?

***

[sfx: shuffling]

MILES I got something! Not cables, but... almost even better.

[C41′s JINGLE PLAYS]

C41 You're... actually doing this?

Oh... Okay. Even if it may be sliiiightly dangerous? Not that I care or anything-

MILES Look, I just can't sit back and do nothing for Athena's birthday.

C41 Yeah, but I think it would be better to guarantee everyone's safety than... You know, possibly blowing us up and setting everything on fire.

[sfx: metal chain drops]

[Miles sighs.]

MILES I guess that's true. I just don't want to disappoint her.

ALEX You're not disappointing her, kid.

MILES Huh?

Oh. Hi, Commander.

ALEX Wipe that sad look off your face. Even if you didn't know, she's happy that you're at least thinking about her right now.

[sfx: footsteps, shuffling, sitting]

MILES I... guess that's true. But I want to make her something. That's what I specialize in.

ALEX Fair enough. I guess I just didn't know you guys were this good of friends.

MILES I don't know that we are. It just seems like the kind of thing I should've tried for, I guess. We've got so much time to spend together and I don't want you guys thinking I'm cold and ignoring you all just because I get wrapped up in crap and get away from myself and especially lately with everything going on with Cal-

ALEX Hey. We don't think that. And I'm not just saying that, either. What were you planning on doing?

MILES I- ... Well, if I tell you, it would ruin the surprise.

ALEX Okay, okay. Do your thing, fix-it guy.

[sfx: getting up, a few footsteps]

MILES Hey, Commander? What if she doesn't like it?

[sfx: footsteps stop]

ALEX Remember what we talked about, kid. Make it from your heart, and she'll love it.

MILES O-okay, Commander... Thank you.

ALEX No problem, Miles. Always here to help. Let me know if you need anything else, yeah?

MILES Mhm! Now, I... I gotta get this show on the road.

ALEX Cal, keep an eye on them for me.

C41 Will do, Commander.

ALEX Good luuuck!

[sfx: retreating footsteps, tent closes]

C41 Well, that surely was-

MILES Alright Cally! We have some major business to attend to!

C41 -motivational.

MILES Okay, so I'm thinking... What if we melt the plastic fork? Like, all the way, and then, and, and then shape it around to make a base for the volcano geyser thing?

C41 That sounds incredibly dangerous. And like it would be highly amusing to watch.

[sfx: a whirring]

C41 (CONT'D) And according to my calculations I am correct on both counts. Do it.

MILES And... then we can put the chocolate in- Hold on, do we have anything to keep the chocolate melted?

C41 Hm. Probably not.

MILES Dammit, okay. That's fine, that's cool, uh... We can hook it up to the batteries someway to keep the heat constant and the launch device powered, that's fine, I can do that...

This is going to be a piece of cake. Let's go, Cally!

C41 How many times to I have to tell you? It's Cal.

MILES Mhmm, yeah. Let's just kick this baby in the teeth.

C41 Wh... what?

MILES It's an expression. Like, "let's blow this popsicle stand"? Or... "let's get this show on the road"?

C41 I don't understand how that could be related to either of those meanings.

MILES Whatever. I am gonna get this thing started, and it's going to be great.

[sfx: prolonged noises of tinkering and contstruction, a zap of electricity]

[Miles yelps.]

[C41 laughs.]

MILES Not funny!

[sfx: more sounds of construction and tinkering]

MILES Aaaaand there! Done. Finished. Phew.

C41 That looks...That... looks...I mean, um...That looks so good!

MILES You think?

C41 Yeah, I think she's-

ALEX (O.S.) How's it looking in here?

MILES Yeah, I think everything went great!

ALEX Perfect!

[sfx: Alex claps]

ALEX (CONT’D) Well, grab it and let's go; we have a birthday to celebrate. Take Cal and we'll meet her and Felix at that clearing. We're doing a little more celebration for Athena.

MILES Okay, Cal. You heard the boss; let's get going then.

C41 Yuuup.

MILES You know, I’m pretty proud of this.

C41 As you should be, Miles.

***

[sfx: approaching footsteps]

MILES HEY! Hey, guys I'm back!

FELIX Hello- oh. Oh wow. What...

ATHENA Miles... what's all this?

MILES It's, uh, it's your gift!

ATHENA Oh, Miles, really you didn't need to do that, that's super sweet, but-

MILES Oh, it's... it's just a little... something... electrocuted myself a few times making it, but- Happy Birthday!

ATHENA Oh. Oh, wow, that's really something, Miles, I love it!

What is it?

MILES It's a geyser. Like... you said. Well, actually you didn't say, but I did some digging and your... your home plant has... geysers, yeah? So it's like a little piece of home.

A geyser.

ALEX A geyser.

ATHENA Oh! Yes! A geyser. Of course! That's really thoughtful, Miles, you, uh... you shouldn't have! So it's like a... trinket! Or a little... a sculpture!

ALEX Oh... just you wait.

MILES Well, it's for more than just show.

Heh. Bet you've never seen anything like this before.

FELIX I'm quite sure I have not.

[sfx: setting down the present, the geyser bubbles and erupts pathetically, with a crackle]

[Miles breathing heavily.]

MILES Ta-dah!

ATHENA Ohhhh, wow, that's... that's so cool. Was it... was it supposed to melt like that?

MILES It was not the intention but apparently... that doesn't matter now-

[C41′s JINGLE PLAYS] 

C41 Evidently.

[sfx: more crackling]

ALEX Oh, okay, is this thing going to blow, Miles? Like actually, really blow?

MILES Shouldn't. It's a possibility... but it shouldn't.

ALEX Cal?

C41 Probably not? It'll be fine! Maybe Miles should get a little closer to shield the blast just in case.

MILES DON'T YOU RUIN THIS BY TRYING TO GET ME KILLED!

C41 Who, me? Never.

[sfx: the crackling and bubbling stops]

ALEX Alright, okay, okay. That was very cool. Right Athena?

ATHENA Right!

ATHENA (CONT'D) Look Miles, I really appreciate this, it's very, very sweet and I just hope you didn't feel like you had to do this, or anything-

MILES No, no, no. I wanted to. I mean... you were around to... keep me calm when I thought we were gonna get eaten in the woods. I didn't want you to think I didn't care, and... I wanted to make something nice for you. Normally I have more stuff to work with than forks and batteries and... chocolate.

FELIX Real chocolate?

ALEX Yes, real chocolate. Not now.

FELIX Ugh, and it's all on the grass, and... what a waste.

ALEX There will be more chocolate. Actually. Felix?

[sfx: receding footsteps]

[Alex and Felix whisper as they retreat.]

ATHENA Um, okay, but... Anyways. Thank you, Miles. That was a lot of fun. And I hope you didn't actually electrocute yourself.

MILES Oh, don't worry, it's not the first time.

C41 They're not joking.

MILES More of a shock than anything.

ATHENA Doesn't sound great for your health either way.

MILES Well, heh, yeah, I mean- Hey, wait a second. Wait what's-

ATHENA Huh?

[sfx: candles burning, approaching steps]

[Alex, Felix, Miles and C41 begin singing “Happy Birthday”]

ATHENA (overlapping) Oh, my... guys, what are you... that better not be our only fruit cake-

ALEX Come on, blow out the... flare candles. Make a wish.

ATHENA Okay, okay!

[sfx: blowing on candles, a glitch]

[sfx: candles burning]

[Alex laughs.]

[Athena hums in confusion]

[sfx: blowing on candles, a glitch]

[sfx: candles burning]

ALEX Come on, Romero. All in one go, now.

ATHENA Right. [sfx: blowing on candles, candles extinguishing]

[The crew cheers.] ALEX Happy Birthday. I'll clean up Miles's present later.

[Alex and Athena laugh.]

FELIX Time for cake!

[Felix leads Alex, Miles, and C41 in singing “For She’s a Jolly Good Fellow”]

FELIX  Cake! ***

[THEME MUSIC FADES IN]

ANNOUNCER Micro-Cosmos: A New Science Fiction Podcast. This episode, "A Little Piece of Home", was written by Zyrel Thompson and Lauren Tucker, edited by Luka Miller, and directed by Jesse Smith, Zyrel Thompson, and Lauren Tucker. It starred Jesse Smith as the voice of Athena Romero, Jackson Rossman as the voice of Miles Abbott, Luka Miller as the voice of Alex dela Cruz, Kaleb Piper as the voice of Felix Couvillion, and Pippa van Beek-Paterson as the voice of Cal. Original music by Julia Barnes, and sound editing by Tobias Friedman. Be sure to stay tuned to our feed for upcoming episodes from the new backpacking intergalactic adventure from Futuristic Trail Mix Productions. To follow the show and find transcripts, you can find us on Twitter, Tumblr, and Instagram as @MicroCosPod. Questions, comments, and concerns can be emailed to us via [email protected]. Find more information on the show on our website, microcospod.space. Thank you for listening.

[THEME MUSIC FADES IN]

ANNOUNCER Futuristic Trail Mix Productions presents Micro-Cosmos: A Science Fiction Podcast. [THEME MUSIC FADES OUT]

[sfx: footsteps, button press]

ATHENA Transmitting on April 8th, 2094, from approximate position on Ophiuchus-22, North 51 degrees West 111 degrees, this is Officer Athena Romero: combination communications-security specialist and resident chronicler with Omnitarian Establishment Crew #0137-F. This is day 12 of our terraforming mission, and our 8th day of hauling ship to the rendevous point. I'm happy to report that the last 24 hours have been pleasantly uneventful, given our... typical circumstances and somewhat whimsical encounters. Dr. Couvillion has continued expanding upon his... catalog, if you will, of flora and fauna he's found on the planet's surface. According to Cal at 0600 this morning, he has gotten it up to 34 items. Impressive. He is, though, still waiting for authorization to send what he collected last week in for analysis, so... I think he would be... Rather appreciative if you could get back to him on that. Please. Hmm what else... oh! Petty Officer Abbott has been busy trying to add... I think they called them 'firewalls'? To Cal's programming, to try to prevent any more... technical accidents, when Cal inevitably gets bored. They are so far unsuccessful, but... I have faith. They were able to successfully repair their ocular functions on Monday after Cal unintentionally disabled them, so... I don't know, we'll see. Commander de la Cruz has been making sure that morale is high, given the long trek. The temperatures on Ophiuchus aren't too terribly hot, only reaching a high of a scalding 25 degrees Celsius yesterday, so being sweaty and miserable hasn't been a tremendous source of torment during our hike... but being painfully bored certainly has, though. She gave Felix a... deck of cards last night. I'm not where she got it, or why she has it, or why she gave it to him,jokinglybut I am quite disappointed she has never invited me to a game of Cribbage. Uh... Aside from that, she has also been doing a wonderful job of navigating us towards our rendezvous point. Either that or we are.. almost definitely screwed, soo... Here's to hoping. I have been spending a large amount of my time in the woods alongside Dr. Couvillion. Not only to serve as protection from... you know, the possibility of predatory creatures, but also to observe for myself! The wildlife here is... gorgeous. Similar to much of what you'd find on Earth but... I don't know, I can't put my finger on it. The more flower reminiscent plants have a much stronger smell than those on Earth, though. Not bad, by any means, but... strong. Like perfume.  It's all very coordinated and... matchy? The fragrances all complement each other. And very well, at that. I feel like it could make the perfect bouquet. Like it was made to make the perfect bouquet, in a metaphorical sense. They're... perfect. I like it. The plant life, I mean. I can... pretty confidently assume that Felix does, as well. I think we all do, if in... very different ways. I think Miles has less of an admirable view of plant life and more of a... sort of... I don't know. I was going to say 'respect,' but that doesn't... Sound entirely right, either. They... acknowledge its importance but... that's about the extent of their reverence. Regardless, I think everyone else is at dinner right now, so I'll... wrap this up and get the two of us back to camp. We're almost halfway through our hike to the rendezvous point right now, and should thus be arriving in... approximately 2-3 weeks. As stated previously, morale is... about as high as it can be while we make our boring... boring way. Outside of all of that, I currently have nothing left to report. So... For now, Romero out. [sfx: button press, footsteps] ATHENA (CONT’D) Are we ready to go, Felix?

FELIX Should be, assuming you are done with your log?

ATHENA Yeah, just finished up. Find anything else?

FELIX Well- [sfx: comms turning on] ALEX (O.S.) You two on your way back yet?

ATHENA Yes, sir... Why, is something wrong?

ALEX (O.S.) No, just a... small situation back at camp. Not an emergency but we could certainly use you guys here with us.

ATHENA 10-4. We'll pick up the pace. ALEX (O.S.) Copy. Thanks.The comms clicks off.

ATHENA Any idea what that was about?

FELIX No. Only one way to find out though, yes?

ATHENA Yeah...Head right on, then?

FELIX Right on. *** ALEX So you're sure you didn't hear anything?

MILES Yes. I was- I was just getting my food. I came out of the tent to sit at the camp. Is that so-

CAL You hesitated.

MILES Oh, shut it, you insufferable little- [sfx: footsteps] ALEX Alright, you two. I wasn't accusing anyone, Miles. I just wanted to know if there was anything you heard or saw that could help us figure out what did do it. I'm not going to put you through trial over a-

FELIX Why is the bag outside of the tent?

ATHENA Why is the bag... slashed open- what happened?

ALEX That's what we're trying to figure out. Glad you two could join us, though. If there's some wild, carnivorous beast out there hunting us down, we're probably better as a unit than alone, right? Right, Felix, there's not a wild, carnivorous beast out there hunting us down?

FELIX Well... [The rest of the crew groans.] CAL On April 7th at 2200 hours, Dr. Couvillion left the following report in his Wildlife Catalog:"Footprint. Reptilian in nature. Tridactyl. Approximately 20 centimeters in length. Located in the southwest forest. Likely predatory." [They groan again.] FELIX I said 'likely!' Not to mention that it was merely a footprint and I have no other correlating information. Some... twigs could have left that.

MILES Some artistic ass twigs-

ALEX Miles.

MILES Commander, you heard what Cal said!

ALEX I did. And it all sounded theoretical to me. Everyone just needs to calm down, it'll be fine. Felix, do you think that there's... a probability that that footprint and the... tear in the bag could be related? Was it pointed towards the camp or anything?

FELIX I wasn't... necessarily looking, at that moment. If we want more information on the classification and nature of this creature, we'll have to go back into the forest and conduct some actual research. MILES No way. ATHENA Let's do it.

MILES Athena!

ATHENA Miles, look at this.

[sfx: the bag rustling as Athena opens it]

ATHENA (CONT’D) First Aid equipment. Bandages, hydrocortisone ointment, antiseptics. If this thing is a legitimate threat, then we need to do something about it, seeing as we've already contaminated and/or shredded the majority of our medical supplies. One of us trips and accidentally gashes our knee open, we're screwed. God forbid someone gets slashed by whatever was sharp enough to trash a polyurethane nylon bag and layers of tough equipment. I... I really don't think this should be up for debate.

ALEX She has a point. If we sit around and wait for whatever it was to come back, it might end up jeopardizing the security of our other equipment. Equipment that we really can't afford to lose. Communication devices, the tent...

FELIX Rations.

ALEX Exactly. Not particularly a risk I'm willing to take when we're lightyears away from base.

[Miles sighs.]

ALEXl You'll be fine, Miles. We've been in the woods dozens of times, now, and we're all still here. Limbs and all.

MILES I know, but... I mean, we've got how much more time before we run out of starlight? An hour? Thirty minutes?

ALEX You've got some nice glasses there, Abbott, don't they do anything? Transitionals, perhaps? New scotopic models?

Flashlight, dude. Felix and Athena go out after dark all the time.

CAL "Nothing routs us but the villainy of our fears," Officer Abbott.

ATHENA Was that Shakespeare-

MILES Cal-

FELIX Miles are you... afraid of the dark?

[Miles groans.]

ALEX Right, then. Into the woods to Grandmother's house we go. Everyone grab a bag and make sure your flashlights are still secured to your belt. We'll head out in 10, get a quick dinner if you need to.

CREW (varying) Yes, sir.

ALEX Oh, and Athena?

ATHENA Yes, sir?

ALEX Nice thinking. ***

ALEX What were those coordinates again, Cal?

CAL North 51 degrees West 111 degrees.

ATHENA North 51 West 111? That's not far from where we were earlier this afternoon. I wasn't... looking out for anything, but I... don't particularly remember seeing anything indicating that there's a... You know, large, reptilian predator out there. You're sure those are it?

CAL That is the approximate center of what we generally refer to as the "southwest forest." So, yes. I'm quite sure, Athena.

MILES "The southwest forest" is a pretty friggin' vague location, Cal. There's no way you could find a... I don't know, more precise target or something?

CAL Of course, Officer Abbott! Give me a moment as I integrate myself into Dr. Couvillion's hippocampus and see the exact location of the footprint measured at a mind-boggling 20 centimeters in length somewhere in an undefined, unexplored, unmeasured forest of foreign flora- and, more importantly, fauna- to get you a "more precise target" since you can't bother walking the extra 0.8 kilo-

MILES Cal, you need to drop this attitude with me! I'm trying to get things done and you're acting like it's some otherworldly request! Just do your job, is it that-

ALEX Hush, you two.

What is taking Felix so long?

MILES Probably making himself a gourmet meal with the trail mix...

[sfx: footsteps, a bag jangling]

FELIX Sorry for the delay, I had to- What's with the staring?

ALEX That's a... lot of equipment you've got there, Felix.

FELIX Well, I figured we would require a particular level of, how do you say... expertise? And as our one and only Chief Science Officer and the only biologist I know of for a couple of lightyears, I figured I would bring some of my equipment. Maybe make it a bit of a learning experience for the less knowledgeable.

Such as Miles.

MILES Now, look here-

ALEX Play nice. That's all actually useful though, right? It's not just going to slow us down?

FELIX No, of course not. It's a collection of hunting and trapping supplies and portable evaluation equipment. If things go as we're expecting, it should all come to use.

ALEX Good, good.

[Alex claps.]

ALEX (CONT’D) Alright. Athena and Miles, you two stay close and keep tabs on each other. Felix and I will take the lead. If you see anything out of place, anything at all, let us know immediately. We should reach the approximated position in... mm, Cal, what do you think?

CAL At your average speed of 13.87 kilometers per hour, I think shooting for 15-20 minutes is your likeliest estimation, Commander.

ALEX Call it 17, then. We've got twenty-ish minutes of starlight left, so make sure your flashlights are secured and you've got your eyes peeled. Not entirely sure what we're looking for, so be ready for just about anything.

Cool... Onward, then. [sfx: footsteps]

***

[sfx: footsteps, birds chirping, forest ambiance]

MILES Hey, Athena?

ATHENA Yes, Miles?

MILES You're the, like... bodyguard, right?

ATHENA [laughs] Security specialist, bodyguard, however you'd like to put it. Yes, I am. Why?

MILES So you...You have a knife or something, right?

ATHENA Yes... It's not exactly going to gut a modern dinosaur, but I have a pocketknife. So does Felix, I think.

[Miles mumbles an affirmation.]

May I ask why you're asking me this?

MILES Oh. No reason.

ATHENA You're sure? No reason at all?

MILES Yes. Well, no. I mean. Well... you know.

ATHENA I... don't. You know you can talk to me, Miles, right? I know I'm not the, uh... social butterfly, that Dr. Couvillion and Commander de la Cruz are, but I'm still your crew member and I'm not going to... bite, or whatever. [chuckles.] I've been told I'm actually quite pleasant to talk to, on occasion.Miles awkwardly chuckles back in response. Before they have time to say anything, though, 

ATHENA I'm sorry if you thought I was trying to make you look like an idiot earlier, I swear, I wasn't. I just... that was a lot of medical supplies, and we've still got a ways before we reach the rendezvous point, so I was... worried, at the implications of possibly losing anything more. I didn't mean to seem... aggressive, or anything, and I am genuinely very sorry if I came across that way.

MILES Oh, no, yeah, no, you're fine. I didn't think much of it. I was being... Stupid, so... No, I get it.

I was asking because of the, uh... "modern dinosaur," by the way. It's getting dark out, so I was just thinking about it.

ATHENA I'm honoured that you think I could take on a potentially 5 meter, thick-skinned dinosaur on my own, Officer Abbott.

MILES Yeah, yeah...Miles stops walking for a moment, as Athena continues to walk. 

[sfx: jangling of Miles searching their belt, a slight droning glitch]

MILES (CONT’D) Hey, wait up a minute!

ATHENA What was that? 

[sfx: repeated clicking]

MILES My flashlight's not turning on!

ATHENA Stay there, give me a second!

Commander, could you two turn back for a moment?

ALEX (O.S.) Yes, turning around now. Everything alright?

ATHENA Yeah, we're fine, just...

[sfx: jangling, clicking from Athena]

ATHENA Torches aren't turning on. Low visuals. Soon none, most likely.

ALEX (O.S.) Fantastic. We'll be there in a minute or two. See you then. Or... not, apparently. de la Cruz out.

[Athena sighs.]

[sfx: jangling, clicking]

ATHENA Miles-

MILES Sorry.

[sfx: forest ambiance] [sfx: a sudden scuttling]

MILES Athena, what the hell was that?

ATHENA I don't know. Stay quiet, I'll go check it out.

[sfx: footsteps]

MILES What? Athena, don't be an idiot, get back here, what are you-

Athena? Are you- [sfx: comms click on] ALEX (O.S.) Hey, our-

[Miles screams.]

ALEX (O.S., CONT’D) -flashlights aren't working either. Not sure what's going on. We should be approaching in a second, though, so just keep an ear out. Copy?

ATHENA(O.S.) Miles? Miles, are you okay?

MILES Uh- yeah, I'm okay, I'm fine, ah

[sfx: button press on comms]

MILES (CONT’D) Copy! Copy. We, uh... we heard something and, unless Felix has taken a liking to scuttling around on forest floors like a squirrel, I think it might be our predator. Athena went to go look, not sure why in Hell she would, but she's... away. A couple meters, at least.

ATHENA (O.S.) I'm fine, don't worry about me. You two should get here as quickly as possible, though, I can hardly see the back of my hand right now, let alone a potentially deadly predator. I think we'll take any help we can get.

ALEX (O.S.) Copy. Okay, how about this. Give us 15 more seconds to cover some distance, and then we'll start a count off. Make sure everyone is accounted for and get some approximated positions. Me, Felix, Miles, Athena, Cal. Out loud, no comms. Make sense?

MILES Yes, sir. 

Well, actually, uh...Cal has been. Shy. For the past few minutes. So unless they've had a major change of heart, I'm not sure how willing they would be to-

ALEX (O.S.) Okay, Miles. Noted. Are we good, Cal? Athena?

ATHENA (O.S.) 10-4.

ALEX (O.S.) Got it, Felix?

FELIX (O.S.) Got it. Uh... what was that about Cal?

ALEX (O.S.) They're... fine. I don't think they plan on running away anytime soon. We can check on them once we get things sorted out. Not the first time they've been... antisocial with us.

Okay, everyone turn your comms off. Listen for our voices. De la Cruz out.

[sfx: comms all click off, forest ambiance]

ALEX ONE!

FELIX TWO!

MILES Three!

ATHENA Four!

ALEX One!

FELIX Two!

MILES Three!

ATHENA Four! ALEX One!

FELIX Two!

MILES Three!

ATHENA Four!

ALEX One!

FELIX Two!

MILES Three!

ATHENA Four!

UNKNOW DISTORTED VOICE FIVE.

[The group SCREAMS, chaos ensues.]

[sfx: various shuffling, running, collisions]

[Athena and Alex exclaim.]

ALEX Are you okay?

ATHENA I think- are you?

ALEX Hell if I know!

FELIX Miles?!

[Miles shrieks.]

FELIX Miles, it's me, calm down!

MILES Sorry, I didn't-

ALEX Everyone, calm-

[CAL laughs. And keeps laughing.]

CAL Oh, you should've seen the looks on your faces! I mean, I couldn't exactly see, but imagining was just as fun! That was great, that was great...

MILES What?

CAL What? It was just a prank, Miles. If this was you, you'd tell me to 'lighten up.’

MILES I think you have a really twisted view on what I think is funny, Cal.

ALEX Cal, this... this is beyond unacceptable. What the hell were you th-

[sfx: a monstrous roar]

[The crew screams, Cal’s boot-down jingle plays]

ALEX Run. RUN, GO!

[sfx: running footsteps]

ATHENA Here, look! Behind here!

MILES So does anybody... want to explain to me... what the hell just happened?

MILES Anyone at all? FELIX Did any of you... actually see the specimen?

MILES Thank you, for not answering my question at all.

FELIX No, Miles, I'm serious. Did any of you catch a glimpse of it? Size estimations, speed, anything?

ALEX I don't think so, Felix. Why? Did you catch something we didn't?

FELIX Not exactly...

[sfx: jingling, shuffling of Felix’s equipment]

FELIX Despite the, ah... acoustics and tone of the beast in question, I don't actually think it... well, hm...

ALEX Felix? What are you getting at?

FELIX I have a theory that this beast may not be quite as beastious as aforementioned, sir. The scale is... not quite adding up to me.

MILES ... what.

FELIX I'll be right back, sir.

[sfx: footsteps of Felix sprinting off]

ALEX Felix- Oh, for the love of-

[sfx: footsteps of Alex sprinting off]

ATHENA Alex!

[sfx: footsteps of Athena sprinting off]

MILES Athena!

[sfx: footsteps of Miles sprinting off]

*** ATHENA Transmitting on April 8th, 2094, from our current base. We have now reached 2100 hours and I...frustratedWhat a day it has been, Headquarters. Following my previous log, sent out approximately 2 hours ago, Dr. Couvillion and I returned to base to find our primary first aid bag slashed open. Contaminated, trashed, and, mostly, useless.

From that point on, it was somehow deduced that a.... reptilian predator was out to sabotage us. Nothing has since pointed against such a deduction, however... the creature is still nowhere to be found. We had a close encounter, though, following an... incredibly tasteless joke from Cal. They later expressed to me that they did it as an act of retaliation. They said it had something to do with their... dismissal. Being used as an asset and nothing more. Not getting to fully interact with the crew like the rest of do, barely being able to get a word in, period. I get that. I don't think what they did was appropriate at all, that's not what I'm saying, but... That feeling. That disconnect. I get it. Regardless, we proceeded to get chased behind a tree. Doctor-

[sfx: footsteps MILES You're telling me. You had. A net. This entire time?

FELIX I told you I had trapping equipment, Miles. I just never got the chance to set anything useful up since somebody here couldn't deal with a broken torch...

MILES Yours was broken too?

FELIX Ah, yes, but I didn't make Athena call up Commander de la Cruz, did I?

[Miles and Felix argue in the background.]

ATHENA Uh, sorry... Doctor Couvillion then set back out, which led to... a bit more chaos. Just what we needed. We then reported back to base, and he was... incredibly insistent about heading back out. So... he and Miles pushed back into the trees. After we all rested for a few minutes. I held back to watch over base, and Commander de la Cruz followed them close behind, with Cal, to make sure they didn't kill each other. Sounds like he had a net. I don't see anything of importance though, so... I'll update later. [sfx: comms click]

ATHENA Anything?

MILES No, just a bunch of stupid twigs.

ATHENA Great.

FELIX It could've at least been a learning experience if someone had put in the smallest twinge of effort. But alas... Miles is doomed to brainlessness.

ALEX GUYS! Guys, you might want to check this out!

MILES She was in the forest?

ATHENA Yes, now go, go go go...There is a shuffling as they all run back to Alex.

FELIX What did you- [gasps].

AWWWWW. Oh my god, that is the most adorable thing I have ever seen...

ALEX Isn't it?

[sfx: the creature murmurs]

MILES That is the most hideous thing I've ever laid eyes on.

CAL Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, Miles.

ATHENA Felix, do you know what that is?

FELIX No. However, its build is very similar to that of a cougar cub, and its reptilian frill, tridactyl state, and scaley nature....

Well, for starters, it's clearly only a baby. Aside from those claws, it couldn't hurt a fly.

[sfx: a single step forward]

[The crew whispers at him.] [sfx: the creature squeaks]

FELIX Isn't that right, little guy? You wouldn't hurt a tiny, little fly, would you? No you wouldn't, no you would not... How does Mercutio sound for a name? Little Mercutio-

[sfx: the creature hisses and sprays]

[Felix screams, the crew exclaims.]

ALEX FELIX! Are you okay?

CAL Doctor Couvillion?!

MILES FELIX!!

ATHENA Are you alright??

FELIX Yes, I'm- I'm fine... Just stings... Bad Mercutio! Bad!

[sfx: the creature hisses and scurries off]

ALEX Dammit.

CAL Don't worry, Commander. The probability of one of Doctor Couvillion's traps catching the creature is incredibly-

[sfx: a trap springs, the creature yelps]

CAL (CONT’D) Likely!

ALEX Joyous day...

Right, Felix, let's get your face checked out. Athena, go see what the situation is at the trap. Cal, maybe back some of the newfound data to the catalog with Miles?

CAL Yes, sir.

Alex undoes their projector from her wrist and hands them to Miles.ALEXGet along with each other. We'll all bed down in 30. CREW (varying) Yes, sir.

*** [sfx: a campfire crackling]

CAL Processing 80% complete. Processing 85% complete. Processing 90% complete. Integrating into mainframe and long term memory drive. Processing 95% complete. Saving to Doctor Felix Augustine Couvillion-

MILES Augustine?

CAL -personal data file. Processing 100% complete. Data saved.There is a quick chime.

CAL Yes. Augustine, Officer Abbott. As an asset of the Omni-Corporation, I have access to each crew member's personal file, seeing as that's useful and convenient. Is this shocking to you?

MILES No, that's not what I meant, you know that's not what I am, I just thought-

CAL Because I can go through all of it right now, if you'd like! Since it seems so interesting! Let's start with the star of the show, yes? Petty Officer Miles Jackson Abbott.

MILES Cal-

CAL Date of birth: June 30th, 2071. Ooh, interesting! Education: Skipped years 7 to 9 in secondary school. Attended the University of Teegarden- very impressive school, Miles- from 2086 to 2088, before facing e- 

MILES ENOUGH, Cal.

CAL I'm sorry that that wasn't convenient for you, Officer. There must be something wrong with my programming. I shouldn't be able to be so challenging, so... impractical. I was only trying to help you. Perhaps it's something that the decommissioning floor will have to look into when we arrive back on Earth. I will try to be a better contrivance in the future. Goodnight, Officer Abbott. [Cal’s boot-down jingle plays.] *** [THEME MUSIC FADES IN] ANNOUNCER Micro-Cosmos: A New Science Fiction Podcast.

[INTRODUCTORY THEME PLAYS.]

[MUSIC FADES OUT.]

[SFX: click of transmitter]

ATHENA Transmitting from landing position on Ophiuchus-22. Approximately...readingNorth 48 degrees, West 114 degrees... March 28, 2094.small beat, quiet inhale before she continuesThis is Officer Athena Romero, communications and security specialist and resident chronicler with Omnitarian Establishment Crew #0137-F. Log one.

[SFX: click]

ATHENA (CON’T) Well, I can certainly say we're all very excited for tonight's rest.beatCommander dela Cruz- Sorry, Alex dela Cruz is currently working with Dr. Felix Couvillion to finish mapping out the weather patterns - Er- climate, I think... to plan for whatever we can expect as we head off for the rendezvous point of HQ's supply drop-off, starting bright and early tomorrow morning. 

Petty Officer Miles Abbott is running a few diagnostic tests on...yawn, trailing on as if she's readingUnit C41. Our ‘Cal.’ To assure that they’re still in top shape for the mission after the trip from Earth. I've yet to receive any updates on their situation, but seeing as I am currently seated in complete silence, I think they're doing just fine.

They're... loud, Headquarters. Really loud. When they really get to arguing. Maybe it's just the stress, and once they settle in they'll-

[SFX: distant chewing]

ATHENA (CON’T) What in the world... What is... What is Felix eating? We haven't even taken our rations out of storage and he's... Never mind, sorry. More work to do, Athena... Though, I'm not sure how much there is left to tell. 

Except... Oh, I don't know, I'm still sort of admiring this place. The beauty of this planet, it's... refreshing. It's not different enough from Earth, or any of the other planets I've visited in my life to be considered shocking, or awe-inspiring. But it's just different enough to be admirable.

Standing here, it feels like stepping out into a cold winter morning, the second that that chilly, dewy air reaches your lungs. You feel that frost sort of swirl around in your throat, and fill you up inside. It shivers in your chest, kisses at your lips, and brings your eyes into focus all in one go, and you feel like you're actually, finally awake.

You exhale, and all of that comfort of your warm bed and your warm house that was still stubbornly holding onto your insides is suddenly a hanging mist in the air in front of you. It's like you're pushing out the old in your lungs to make room for the new, you know?

There's... a sense of home in inviting that cold into your system. Your body is refreshed- your mind is refreshed, and it feels like... Like room for something new. Like walking onto a ship and preparing to launch off to a new planet over a thousand lightyears away. And as I sit here on this... gravel-adjacent ground, I feel that refreshing sense of home. A new home. For the next couple-hundred days.

All I can hope for, I guess, is... that the beauty of this place remains that refreshing, homely feeling. Or that... the five of us are able to keep that feeling going for each other.

If they even... You know, feel that way about it, too, or whatever. Maybe they'll get it. I hope they do. I am... incredibly excited about this mission, and I am beyond honored to be here. I know everyone back at camp is probably still laughing at me for taking this assignment, but I am fully and genuinely so excited for what's to come. And I hope that the rest of the crew is as well. I know I'm not an expert at showing it, exactly, but...

Sorry, I don't know. Sorry. I tend to ramble, I've gotten distracted, and I don't know that there's anything else I actually need to... put in a log. So, I think I'll end it there, for now, HQ. Sorry. From transmission point, North 48 degrees, West 114 degrees on Ophiuchus-22, a refreshingly beautiful place to be, this is Officer Athena Romero, signing off.

ALEX (distant) Athena, mind helping me with-

[SFX: click]