#microcos pod

[THEME MUSIC PLAYS]

ANNOUNCER Futuristic Trail Mix Productions presents Micro-Cosmos: A Science Fiction Podcast.

[THEME MUSIC FADES OUT]

*** [sfx: external storm ambiance echoing through the cave, button press]

FELIX Um... hello world. This...This is Chronicling Log One, of Doctor Felix Augustine Couvillion. I am the science officer on duty with Omnitarian Establishment Crew, erm... zero three... no, we're um...

Zero-one-three-seven-F. Yes. It says so right here.

You'll have to forgive me. Ordinarily, when I make these recordings, they're for my own notes, or for my scientific peers. I am not used to simply... documenting the goings-on, especially... my goings-on... when confined to a cave.

According to Athena, this is for a chronicling protocol called a Code Drag. It refers to, if memory serves, a distress situation without a contingency that, at present, makes mission objectives impossible to complete. That is to say, we have been "dragged" off course. There is no contingency plan for a cinderburst. Cal says they're too rare to even warrant such a thing, nor is there enough research to determine how one could occur here. If these storms supposed to be characteristic of desert terrain, however, I would say Ophiuchus is hardly a suitable candidate. Not that I can research such a claim when I have no signal to reach any external databases that could be of help. No, that would be too easy.

Instead of that, what I do is I sit inside of a cave, talking to myself, and try to avoid going... slightly mad. If I wasn't there already, of course. I wonder how Athena manages it.

For the sake of my friend, however, I am sucking it up and beginning with these entries. I've been procrastinating for long enough, so, I will see to it that I make this log faithful to its purpose, and as honest as I can manage. I'll start with a caution, though. This cave is dull, even considering what you would expect from a cave, namely: not much. For that reason, I'm afraid I cannot guarantee you anything riveting, my dear listener. Consider yourself to be warned.

So, I hear you ask me: What have I, Doctor Felix Couvillion, been up to, now that myself and my friends have spent about... oh, a day and a half inside a damp, cavernous lair of darkness? You ask me, 'Felix, what are the Tales from the Tunnels? The Stories from the Stones? The Accounts of'... a, a, um... a cave. The cave, which I'm sure I will have memorised every vein of by the time daylight decides to reappear.

In short, I've been working. Making note of the vegetation in here, and how it might help us. I've found a new variant of fruit-bearing vine, actually. Edible. Similar to a terran gooseberry. It will make for a decent snack, once my trail mix finally runs out. A sad day, that will be. Somehow I don't find this discovery as exciting as I should. The Commander, she tries hard to keep our morale afloat, but... you know. It hasn't been long, and somehow, I already feel as though we are... contained. Stuck in some version of a time capsule, and... preserved until the next moment we are meant for is to resume.

[Felix sighs.]

FELIX (CONT'D) There's no wildlife in here, as of yet. No water either. That makes sense, on paper. The fact of the matter is that carbon-based animal life needs water. Including us. In a worst case scenario, our current water supply wouldn't last us. So, I either solve this problem, or we all slowly die of dehydration, sucking the juice out of vine berries as a last ditch attempt to survive. Yeesh. Not a pretty picture, hm?

Which is why I will make my third trek to scout a potable water source this afternoon. If I'm able to find room in my busy schedule Oh! In between my rounds, though, I have found something to pass the time-He stops again. This is... what a chronicling log is for, yes? Cataloguing however our time is spent inside an unavoidable disaster?

Sure it is. Anyways. I have... wait for it... I have rediscovered my love for card tricks! And I can still manage to do them, too. It's like it never left me, in a way. Like riding a bike for the mind. Or, as Morgan once put it, riding a bike for nerds. Here, I'll show you. ...You can’t see me. Dammit. Well, let's try it like this, then. Were you here, dear listener, you would shuffle the deck. You would pick a card, only in your mind. And then, you'd give the deck back to me, and after a series of convoluted detours through what seems like a magical process, the card would end up in your pocket, a place it certainly shouldn't be. Ta da! Okay, okay, a magician shouldn't reveal his tricks, I know. But I can't contain myself, so I'll give you a tidbit. I forced a card on you, at the start. You thought it was your choice. It wasn't. It was, likely, the Ace of Dishes. Good card. I'm fond of it. It's an interesting thing, that trick. According to the logical part of your brain, the card should be in the deck, with the rest of its friends. It’s family, if you will. Your eyes told you it should be there, and so of course, you're expecting it to be there. Or were you? That card, from the second you or I chose it, when you saw it, and we convinced each other that it was special, or different, the, hm... well, the zeitgeist of the situation told you that by the end of the trick... that card wasn't going to be in it's rightful place. It wasn't going to be like all the others. It was going to be... miraculously misplaced. In reality, the misdirection relies on both expectations. It needs the voice of reason, and the voice of the little child inside your brain that really really really wants magic to be real, just so it can stir a whit of joy. In my experience, though, most things in life that are misplaced from where they belong, it's... not a good situation. Take our example. One looks down at the flowers for a moment, giving the storm just enough time to sneak up and tap him on the shoulder, and... Abracadabra. Misdirected... misplaced from mission objectives. This kind of thing... does not bring much joy, does it? That's my insight, anyways. And that's about as much as I can fill a Chronicling Log with, for now. I'm going to check up with the others. Um, Doctor Felix Augustine Couvillion, ending Log One.

[sfx: button click]

***

ATHENA ... That's a dog?

MILES Yeah. It's supposed to be! Like... bark?

ALEX Sorry, I... honestly thought it was supposed to be a sock puppet.

MILES Sock puppets don't have ears!

ATHENA ...An ear?

ALEX That's an ear?

ATHENA I mean I figured it was an animal of some kind, but-

MILES I never claimed to be good at shadow puppets, okay?

C41 Clearly.

MILES Cal, you don't have tangible hands, you don't get an opinion.

C41 At least I know that dogs aren't that long.

[sfx: approaching footsteps]

ALEX Yeah, actually, kinda... looks like that little cat thing that bit Felix.

FELIX It was a spray, not a bite. That makes it sound a lot more gross, actually.

[Alex claps her hands.]

ALEX Nice to see the party's finally here!

FELIX Hm? "Party"? That's new.

ALEX Did you bring the deck of cards?

FELIX Of course.

ALEX Then you're the party.

[Felix laughs.]

ALEX (CONT'D) Where've you been?

FELIX Recording my first chronicling log. I figured an update on my perspective was in order.

ATHENA Oh, good, thank you. How'd it go?

FELIX Um... well, I think. A bit meandering, maybe. Not anything special.

ATHENA Honestly, however they end up going is fine. It's just a matter of getting an account from everyone of how they're doing and what's going on. That's all I really have to do, most of the time. You'd be surprised how useful a ramble is when you have it on file. What did you meander about?

FELIX Oh just... you know. Something that I've been brushing up on. Here, I'll show you, actually.

MILES Sure, just share your talents with the class I guess.

C41 This should be interesting.

[sfx: unboxing and shuffling playing cards]

MILES What is this?

FELIX It's a card trick.

MILES A card trick...

FELIX Correct. Can I have a volunteer?

[Athena, Alex and C41 respond positively.]

FELIX (CONT'D) Miles, thank you, so kind of you to volunteer.

MILES My hand was not up.

FELIX Here, shuffle these.

MILES Ugh. Fine.

[sfx: cards shuffling]

FELIX No, don't give them to me! That's against the rules.

MILES Oookay. I'll keep em.

FELIX You're thinking of a particular one, I can tell.

MILES Uh... sure. Six of stars?

FELIX No, no, that's not it. Come on, this one only works if we convince each other that it's going to work. It was a low card, something... special.

MILES Low, and... special? Like an Ace?

FELIX It was an Ace?

MILES Yeah. Yeah, an Ace.

FELIX But not the Ace of Stars? We've got Planets, Comets, Dishes and Stars, but... How about you pick two of those, Officer Abbott?

MILES Dishes and Stars.

FELIX We'll keep the Dishes and the Stars then, and get rid of the other two. But it wasn't Stars, so the Ace of Dishes, then?

MILES Yeah.

FELIX The Ace of Dishes was the first card that came to mind, you're sure?

MILES Yeah.

FELIX Perfect. Athena, could you pick a number for me? It could be anywhere between, er... one to ten.

ATHENA Seven.

FELIX Seven. Very well. Miles, can I have the deck back?

MILES Oh, that's allowed now?

FELIX Of course, don't be silly. Now, I'm going to pull seven cards off the top of this deck that Miles shuffled and, well... we'll see what happens.

[sfx: cards being drawn from the deck]

FELIX (CONT'D) One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven.

Oh... dear, that's not it.

MILES Jack of Comets. Figured it wouldn't-

FELIX Indeed. Wait, Miles, what's that?

MILES What's what?

FELIX In your shirt pocket.

[sfx: an emphatic rustling and card flip.

FELIX This?

MILES The... Ace... of Dishes. Wait.

[Athena applauds.]

[Alex laughs.]

ALEX Hey now, how the hell did you do that?

FELIX Ah, ah. Magicians. Secrets. You know the rules.

ALEX I bet Cal knows.

C41 I have... an idea or two, but I'm not exactly sure, really. Nice job.

FELIX Thank you.

MILES I don't know how you did that. I am going to find out how you did that.

[sfx: lots of movement]

[Indistuguishable frenzied comments from the crew.]

***

[sfx: echoing footsteps, very distant external storm ambiance.]

[sfx: button click.]

FELIX Doctor Felix Augustine Couvillion. Recording Chronicling Log... Two, I suppose. Though it hasn't been long.

I had to escape from Miles's endless, somewhat terrifying questions. I fear those will be a common occurrence from this point on.

Anywho. I am currently... well, I don't know exactly where I am. My analog compass says I am southeast of our campsite, which is just outside the entrance to the tunnel system. But, I'm not so sure. You would think this little gadget would be unaffected by the storm, but the cinderbust seems to be acting on all of our other equipment as if it were somehow a geomagnetic storm. This, of course, may mean it is confusing the compass needle as well. 

So I'm not sure I can trust in that bearing. What I do know is, I took a left. So at least I have that to go on.

I did promise the Commander that I wouldn't stray too far from the camp when I'm alone. But I'm not alone. I'm on the hunt for a source of water, and I'm taking you, whoever will listen to this, with me for the journey. So technically, I'm keeping my promise, while getting results. Hopefully. Hopefully getting results. It isn't like I have any real reason to be concerned about my safety. Like I had mentioned, there have been no encounters with wildlife as of yet. Then again, I've been wrong before. It would be just my luck to end up being wrong again. But, I survived Mercutio, ergo, I could likely survive anything. The little devil.

[sfx: flashlight clicks on]

FELIX (CONT'D) Let there be light.

Ah. It appears we've reached a choice to make. Hm. Left... or... right. I'd rather not go in a circle. Right it is.

Left, then right. Left, then right. Left then... right. Okay.

So, anyways. I hadn't had any previous luck taking a right initially, where I first chose to go left. My left. Not... upon return- never mind. I know what I mean. I hadn't gone too far that way, in any case. 

Only today did I figure out the loophole in my promise, and... in terms of balancing my very busy schedule, I figure that it's best not to spend all my time fretting over dehydration. Going prematurely mad is not in my plans.

There are some interesting mineral formations on the ceiling. It may be worth taking a sample to submit on my way back. They're a sort of bluish-white, and they seem to form in hexagonal clusters, about three to four centimetres in length. Quite pretty. Pretty enough to understand the appeal of geology, if only for a moment. No offence to geologists, of course.

No luminescence is visible from the formations. My torch is the only current source of light. I suppose luminescence would have been too much to hope for. It is... rather dark, this way. Miles wouldn't like it. I don't think Miles likes many things, come to think of it. There's a grumpy individual if you ever did see one. But, a decent traveling companion when the mood strikes them-

[sfx: walking stops]

FELIX (CONT'D) Dead end. Hm. I'll make a mental note.

[sfx: footsteps resume]

FELIX (CONT'D) That's annoying. Back the way we came, then.

It might have done me good to bring Cal along. Most of their functions may be, er, rusty, at present, but they still have the sensors for these sort of things. Or perhaps I should have brought the Commander. Navigations, and all. Eh. I'm still not too far. And I have you, don't I, my trusty comms friend?

Even if you're not one for conversation. The brooding type. Strong and silent. I can work with that. And I can be fairly sure that I'm-

[sfx: footsteps stop suddenly]

FELIX (CONT'D) What?

[A long silence.]

[Felix swallows and chuckles nervously.]

FELIX (CONT'D) Well. I... must not have been paying attention as well as I'd thought.

I've just... I've just come up against another dead end. Where I thought... no, where the entrance to this passage should be. Where... where it just... was.

It can't have just... filled behind me. I would have heard the crash.

Right?

Same tunnel. Same... crystals. Perhaps a bit more on the indigo side that I had originally noticed. No more, or, um, less lacking luminescence.

Alright, er... Perhaps I took a turn and passed it. I'll retrace... my steps. What you're looking for is always in the last place you check, right?

[sfx: footsteps]

[Felix breathes shakily.]

[sfx: sound of distant running water fades in]

FELIX (CONT'D) Do you... do you hear that? That sounds like...

[sfx: the water sound recedes, replaced by storm ambiance]

FELIX (CONT'D) Sounds like... wishful thinking.

No, I could've sworn. I could have sworn. I'm not mad. I'm not.

FELIX (CONT'D) Don't you look at me like that. You're a bundle of wires and metal. You're not capable of going mad, only getting broken.

I... I wonder which is worse.

[sfx: a draft blowing in from the right side]

FELIX (CONT'D) Well. I... hadn't noticed that before. There's an offshoot path here, in between... I suppose in between dead ends. It must... it would have to lead deeper into the cave. I can't... This doesn't make any sense.

[Felix struggles to look inside the narrow path.]

FELIX (CONT'D) I can't make out anything inside. Very dark, but... But there's a draft. Meaning... it must lead outside. No daylight, however.

Well, of course there's no daylight, Felix. Remember why you're here in the first place.

[sfx: the draft stops unnaturally abruptly]

FELIX (CONT'D) Well, that doesn't make any sense, now does it?

The wind from the passage seems to have... turned off. Just... just like that.

I should just go back the way I came. Yes. That's what I should do.

[sfx: the sound of running water resumes]

FELIX (CONT'D) Wait... is... am I hearing that right...?

Not right now, thank you. I could do without the difficult decision.

Fine. Fine! Fine then, I'll just...

[He struggles further to get inside the path, with a few laboured mutterings.]

[Felix pants.]

[sfx: water droplets hitting the ground.]

FELIX (CONT'D) Yahtzee.

[sfx; unscrewing a thermos, letting water drip inside]

FELIX (CONT'D) I'll have to ensure this is potable, first. Or if I can make it potable. I'm sure it will be fine... Either way this is a good sign for our continued survival.

[sfx: extremely loud shifting of rock]

FELIX (CONT'D) What in the... What was that?

I've got enough of this to test but... The only problem is, I don't know that I could find it again. I... almost certainly don't know where I am.

[sfx: another creaking shift of rock]

[Felix gasps and exclaims.]

FELIX (CONT'D) What... I'm sorry, I just... felt a shift there, it startled me.

There's obviously an explanation for this but... I don't think I'm in any state to continue this trip. I need... I need to get back to camp.

[sfx: footsteps resume]

FELIX (CONT'D) Next time, if I ever come back this way, I'm bringing someone with me.

[sfx: running water fades out]

FELIX (CONT'D) Wait, uh... where... but I had just looked through...

I can't see that passage anymore. Where I got the water. Can you?

Of course you can't. I'm talking to myself. I bet no one will ever even listen to these. It isn't as if you care. You let this happen in the first place, sent us somewhere new without contingencies, and I'll bet you still don't feel responsible.

It's there. You can't see it from this angle, but it's there, you just can't see it in the dark.

[sfx: extremely loud stone creaking and moving]

FELIX (CONT'D) I need to go. I need to... I need to leave.

[sfx: running footsteps]

[Felix pants.]

[sfx: footsteps slow and stop]

FELIX (CONT'D) Left or... right? I swear, this doesn't... what was that goddamn sound?!

No. No, you shouldn't hear this. Am I transmitting, or... is this a recording-

[sfx: comms click]

***

[sfx: comms click]

ATHENA -were just looking for you.

FELIX I know, I know, I lost track of time-

ATHENA Alex was worried sick, we thought we heard you yell-

FELIX Well, that's very kind of her, but I-

ATHENA Felix... are you okay? Did something-

FELIX I'm fine.

ATHENA Okay.

Next time, maybe, take one of us with you. Or at least tell us when you'll be back.

FELIX Sure, sure. In any case, it was a success.

[sfx: unscrewing a thermos]

FELIX (CONT'D) Water. Fresh. Hopefully potable.

ATHENA That's great! That's a relief. Okay. Where did you find it?

FELIX Oh. Heh. Funny you should ask, actually.

ATHENA Oh?

FELIX Yes, I... see I was fine, but along the way I got a little... lost, it wasn't anything to be concerned about, but... I may have a little trouble finding it again.

ATHENA Oh.

FELIX Ah, but, don't worry.

I kept the recorder running.

ATHENA Uh... well, that's good. It definitely makes my job a lot easier.

FELIX Well, yes, and I... wasn't alone.

ATHENA Right.

FELIX And! And, perhaps if I give this a listen, it would help me figure where I got turned around. Nothing a second journey won't fix.

ATHENA Not alone this time.

FELIX Not alone the first time because I personified my comms but... yes I see your point.

ATHENA Well, let's give it a listen, then.

FELIX Okay. Okay, okay, okay.

[sfx: button pressing]

FELIX (CONT'D) It should be my most recent... input, let's see here. Ah. There.

[sfx: button press]

RECORDING FELIX Doctor Felix Augustine Couvillion. Recording Chronicling Log... Two, I suppose. Though it hasn't been long.

[sfx: a sudden click, lasting static]

ATHENA Um, Felix?

FELIX ...Yes?

ATHENA Was that the end of the recording?

FELIX No. Definitely not.

ATHENA Then why... did you stop talking?

FELIX I didn't stop talking, I kept it running the whole time, I only turned it off just before I saw you!

ATHENA Something must have happened, then. Can I see it?

FELIX Sure, sure.

ATHENA It doesn't look like a corrupted file, in fact, everything seems to be working fine. Out here, at least.

Maybe the storm messed with your comms too, somehow. Or maybe... maybe there's some good conductors in the stone too, deeper in the cave, that could have thrown off your signal, or...

FELIX Or it could have been my own fault.

ATHENA It happens to the best of us, Felix.

FELIX Well, finding that source again just got infinitely harder, didn't it?

ATHENA Maybe? I don't know. Either way, we have time before that search becomes urgent, and, at least we know it exists. Hopefully we never really have to worry about it at all.

FELIX That doesn't make it any less frustrating, though, does it?

ATHENA Well, technology is wonderful, when it works. I appreciate the fact that you were recording anything for me at all, I know that code protocol can be a pain.

FELIX Well, strange as it sounds, I'm glad these protocols exist. It makes it seem like an effort is being made to keep things sorted, I suppose.

ATHENA Keeping our ducks in a row?

FELIX Precisely.

ATHENA Well, I can only hope. I've never had to run a crew-wide chronicling operation before outside of a drill. I was hoping I would never have to.

FELIX One narrator of this comedy of errors should have been enough?

ATHENA Precisely.

Anyways, do you want to head back to camp now? Everyone will want to know you're alright.

FELIX They were really worried?

ATHENA Of course they were. Alex wants her ducks in a row, too. An odd one out wouldn't be good for us.

FELIX Like an Ace of Dishes.

ATHENA Only, we were pretty sure you weren't in Miles's pocket.

[Both laugh.]

ATHENA (CONT'D) Here.

[sfx: footsteps]

ATHENA (CONT'D) This way.

***

FELIX Chronicling Log of Doctor Felix Augustine Couvillion, third part.

It's past evening now, into the night. I think the others have gone to bed. Yet, it appears that I can't sleep. Something about today unnerved me. There is no explanation for my confusion, except my own anxieties, my paranoia, what have you. I know that.

I know that in the same way I know that the walls of a cave don't move around you. Not unless you are very patient, dead, or mad.

In my case, the jury is still out on the latter.

A planet isn't conscious, it isn't sentient, it shouldn't know who I am.

And yet, there's nothing left of that recording to even tell you what I mean. All that's left is how I remember it, and that perturbs me.

Here's the thing: I can tell myself that I lost my way in a dead end simply because I am afraid of what happens when I turn my back. But if I deem that fear a sound rationalization... then I may have something to evaluate. A time of soul-searching, hopefully. In the company of a snack.

ALEX Yikes. Deep. Make sure you have your coffee first.

FELIX Commander! Where did- I'm sorry, I thought you were asleep with the others, did I wake you-

[Alex laughs quietly.]

ALEX Shh, shhh! Athena and Miles are still asleep, I was just... I was... never mind.

[sfx: Alex sits down.]

ALEX (CONT'D) You recording?

FELIX Er, yes. As redundant as it may seem. 

ALEX Redundant?

FELIX Yes. Just between you and me, boss? I doubt anyone will ever listen to these.

ALEX You really think so?

FELIX The good folks back at headquarters tend to overindulge on bureaucracy. Efficiency is prioritised to the detriment of efficiency.

Perhaps the duty will be passed on to an Artificial Intelligence like our friend. I suppose that works just as well.

ALEX There's the silver lining I was waiting for.

FELIX Oh, don't rely on me for that.

ALEX Why not? It's worked so far.

Case and point: that card trick was probably the silver lining of my day. And I still have no idea how you did it.

FELIX Really?

ALEX Really. No clue. Unless Miles was in on it, but I seriously doubt that.

FELIX I can show you.

ALEX Yeah?

[sfx: rustling through a bag, cards rustling, flipping and shuffling]

FELIX Certainly.

Now, the first thing is, Miles didn't pick the Ace of Dishes. I did. And then I convinced them that they did. And convincing Miles Abbott of something is probably the hardest part of any trick, so if you can manage that... this next part is quite easy.

ALEX The next part is the actual trick, you mean.

FELIX The convincing is the trick. If you can't even convince yourself that you can do it, make a card do something miraculous, how are you going to convince the people watching?

ALEX Good point. Teach me.

FELIX Very well. So it looks like this, when we actually do it. Pulling it out of a pocket.

[sfx: card flick]

FELIX (CONT’D) But really, we're just folding the card behind quickly as you flick it off the bottom of the pack, like that, and then... you cup it into your palm when you reach out. It never leaves your hand.

[sfx: the same card flick, but slower]

[sfx: a card sliding]

ALEX Oh. Ohhhhh, okay! Gimme one.

[Felix laughs.]

[sfx: passing Alex a card.]

FELIX Give it a try.

ALEX Okay... so... take it from the bottom of the... deck, and then-

[sfx: a similar card flick, a similar card slide]

ALEX (CONT’D) Like that?

FELIX Yes. Exactly.

ALEX Alright. Alright, okay. So... from here...

[sfx: a quick card flick, a quick card slide]

ALEX Like that?

FELIX Ha! You picked that up quickly, sir.

[sfx: repeated flick and slide of the card performed by Alex]

ALEX I can do more than play Go Fish, Couvillion.

FELIX That's for certain. It's double trouble for the rest of the crew, in any case. Two magicians are better than one, you know.

[sfx: card sounds stop]

ALEX Oh, man. Miles is going to hate this.

***

ANNOUNCER Micro-Cosmos: A Science Fiction Podcast.

[sfx: forest ambiance, running footsteps]

FELIX BIIIIIIRD!

That... is nineteen! Almost... at... victory.

[sfx: running footsteps]

MILES That... was not... fair... you tripped me!

FELIX Did... not.

MILES Did too!

FELIX Did not!

MILES Totally did.

FELIX The point is mine, fair and square. You did not set eyes upon that bird, first, thus-

MILES Because you cheated!

FELIX What would you have me do, forfeit the point?

MILES Yes.

FELIX Well I'm not going to do that.

MILES I know. Ya lousy-

[sfx: a bird caws]

MILES BIRD!

FELIX Bird? Ah yes, Bird. Ah, damn. Bird.

MILES Haha, that's a nineteen-nineteen tie, next points the winner.

FELIX Yes. And that point belongs to me.

MILES Yeah, right. Tell you what, then. Let's have a wager. I'll even let you pick the terms.

FELIX Okay. The loser has to carry Athena's birthday present around in their bag for a week.

MILES Athena doesn't want to carry it?

FELIX No one wants to carry it, my friend.

MILES Fine! That's fine! It's not like I worked super hard on it or anything-

FELIX

Shh. I'm sensing... an avian presence.

[sfx: birdsong, running footsteps taking off]

FELIX ALLONS-Y!

[sfx: running footsteps taking off]

MILES WAIT UP!

FELIX Where... are... you...

[sfx: a whack]

[Felix yelps.]

MILES Ha! You-

[sfx: a similar whack]

MILES (CONT'D) AA! MY EYE!

***

[THEME MUSIC FADES IN]

ANNOUNCERFuturistic Trail Mix Productions presents Micro-Cosmos: A Science Fiction Podcast.

[THEME MUSIC FADES OUT]

***

[sfx: forest ambiance, running water, a click]

MILES Oww.

ATHENA This is-

MILES Owww.

ATHENA This is-

MILE OWWW!

ALEX Dude, just hold still. You took quite the fall out there.

ATHENA Athena Romero... recording. Hi. It's Day 28, and we're stationed at approximate position North 57 degrees West 105 degrees, still enroute to our equipment dropoff point and making good time at that. We've had to stop for a little, uh, first aid. Miles and Felix got hit in the face with a tree branch playing their new game. It's called Bird... I hate it.

FELIX Hey, Bird is- ow - Bird is fun!

ALEX Until the forest pokes your eye out along the way, Doc.

FELIX I'd call it an occupational hazard.

ATHENA Thankfully, Headquarters, no one actually lost an eye. By some miracle.

[C41′s BOOT-UP JINGLE PLAYS]

C41 Oh, the odds of them losing an eye aren't as high as you'd hope. I ran the calculations.

MILES Yeah? Let me check your math on that one.

C41 No.

ATHENA Anyways. We thought it'd be a good time to take a walking break. Maybe have some lunch.

[sfx: rummaging]

ALEX Aw, shoot. Looks like we're lacking in antibiotics to get this one on your knee cleaned up, Miles. Cal, any chance we're getting more of that with the shipment?

C41 I do have "additional first aid supplies" on the roster, Commander. So... probably!

ALEX I will take a "probably" for all that it's worth as far as HQ is concerned, kid. And hey, we're almost to the drop-off point. Speaking of which, Starshine, did you get the memo to them that we're ahead of schedule?

ATHENA Oh, uh, oh! Yeah, I did get the relay to them last night, and they came back with an acknowledgement. I think we're just going to have to wait it out though.

ALEX Aces. Cal, how much longer do we have on the walking?

C41 Eh, not much! About another...

[sfx: mechanical whirring]

C41 (CONT'D) Hour!

MILES An hour?

ALEX Hey, I like the sound of that.

FELIX Just think. All of that extra time to play Bird.

ATHENA And, sorry to ask, but, Bird is fun... because?

ALEX Because I think all this walking has made the doctor go a bit batty.

FELIX Perhaps. More like... bird-y. If you will.

[Miles groans.]

MILES You set him up for that one, you know- Ow!

ALEX Just a sanitising wipe. I know, I know, it stings. It's the best we're gonna do to keep it clean for now.

[C41 giggles.]

MILES What are you laughing at?

C41 Aw, nothing. Just like... you guys are so funny, with your 'physical pain' thing.

MILES Hilarious.

C41 Precisely my point.

MILES Well, somebody's chipper today.

C41 I am! It's almost time for me to get to like, actual work. As soon as we can set up camp at the rendezvous to make it our base? Watch me go, baby.

ALEX Wait a minute. You, Cal, are excited about doing work?

C41 Sure I am! I'm excited for work that's not super boring and lame and leaves me wanting to tie up my code in particularly pretty bows. Establishing our infrastructure, our inventory, our food sources, and oh, ooh! Getting started on actual research? They sour.I hope I just don't lose out on sleep.

MILES Yeah, sure. We wouldn't want that.

C41 And, and, Miles, while I'm busy doing important things, you can be off doing... whatever little tasks you're supposed to do.

MILES First of all, excuse you, I'm the engineering specialist too, not your friggin nanny, so like, I'm going to have plenty to do that is very important. And second of all, maybe I'll get to sleep instead of clacking away at fixing your code all night like a monkey at a typewriter, alright?

C41 Sure, sure. Now, are everyone's booboos in order? I'm sure Athena and Alex are getting antsy.

ATHENA Oh guys, no, it's fine. Take your time, we're not in a rush.

MILES No, you know what, my booboos- I mean my uh, my scrapes and stuff, are fantastic. Let's go.

FELIX But... I'm so weak.

MILES Nope. Up ya go.

C41 Something to prove, much?

ALEX You'll be fine Felix. Have some trail mix, and we'll be motoring, alright?

FELIX (chewing) Way ahead of you, sir.

ATHENA Alright. Off we go.

[sfx: a click]

***

[sfx: forest ambiance, a click]

ATHENA Recording from the drop-off point, at long last, this is Officer Athena Romero with Omnitarian Establishment Crew #0137-F. It's only been just over an hour since my last log, but we're here. We're here, and now we just have to camp out, and wait for the rest of our supplies. It'll be some downtime well-earned, I think.

ALEX I'd say so.

[sfx: walking footsteps, stopping, setting a bag down]

ATHENA Oh, hey Alex! Let me guess, the others are-

ALEX Competitive birdwatching? Yeah. I don't even think that they realise that that's what they've invented.

ATHENA Aw, jeez, even Cal? Or did you put them on babysitting duty?

ALEX Cal is... keeping score, apparently. Look, you didn't hear it from me, but sometimes I think that they miss Miles when I'm carrying their projector.

ATHENA Really?

ALEX Nah. They're babysitting.

[Athena laughs.]

ATHENA Well played, Commander.

ALEX Peace and quiet is probably one of the best sounds in the world. Second only to good conversation and blaring rock 'n' roll.

ATHENA Sounds like something I should write down.

[Alex laughs.]

ALEX Dude, no, I'm just rambling. And besides, you're recording this, aren't you?

ATHENA Yeah. I mean, I can turn it off, if you want.

ALEX It's fine with me. Kinda nice actually, to think we'll be able to look back on whatever it is we talked about on this mission when we're all old.

ATHENA I never thought about it like that. Guess I thought I was just doing my job.

ALEX Really?

ATHENA ... Yeah, why?

ALEX I don't know, I hear you every once in a while, when you're recording, and... you know how to talk. You a poet in your spare time, by chance?

[Athena laughs.]

ATHENA No, no, I'm... I don't know, I'm not anything in particular. I was corp security, for a while, and then I got into communications and chronicling protocol through that, and... yeah, that's me, if they didn't already tell you as part of the whole 'Commander' thing.beatI'm certainly not, uh, 'recogalex', though.

ALEX Okay, so you uh... know about that whole thing?

ATHENA 'Whole thing'? You mean when you were like... one of the biggest names in sporting sim gaming for years, plural? Yeah, I figured it out. Me and the others in the forces, we didn't really have anything else to keep up with, so we got very much into keeping up with those tournaments.

ALEX Alright, alright. Just thought I'd be able to keep my nerdiness a secret from my crew for a little while longer.

ATHENA Why bother? I mean, if I was as good as you at that stuff, I...realizing as she says itI never would've stopped.

ALEX I guess I just... the same as you. I thought of it as my job, after a while. It started as a way to help me cope with my anxiety, and then, I guess it turned out that I was good at it, and liked it. I liked it a lot.

But I got married, and then we were gonna have a kid, and-

ATHENA Wait, you're married?

ALEX I was. Me and Gabriel split up, a little while after our son, Orion, was born.

ATHENA Oh... that's too bad.

ALEX Oh, it's fine, really. Gabe's amazing, honestly, we both just... wanted different things out of life. It just wasn't working for us to be married anymore. Now we're friends. We're friends that used to be married, and friends that have a son that we love more than anything in the world. And I can't say I mind it, as long as I know they're both waiting for me back home.

ATHENA Wow. I mean, that sounds... that sounds like all you could hope for.

ALEX Yeah... yeah, I guess it is.

***

[sfx: forest ambiance]

MILES This is stupid. We haven't seen anything fly overhead since we got here.

FELIX Hey, hello, uh, you know the decree of the Game of Bird.

[C41′s BOOT UP JINGLE PLAYS]

C41 "They who question the sanctity of Bird will be disqualified from all future matches of Bird on the basis of disloyalty and heathendom," Miles.

FELIX And don't you forget it.

MILES I know, I know, for the millionth time, I know.

C41 Then don't go getting yourself disqualified.

MILES Hold on, was that... an encouragement?

C41 Of course not. I just like to see a good match-

MILES Okay, cause for a second there, it sorta sounded like a-

[sfx: bird caws]

FELIX BIRD! 

[sfx: a bell dinging cue]

C41 That's one point to the distinguished Couvillion gentleman.

MILES Please tell me you're not going to do that every time someone gets a point.

C41 Don't be silly! I'm not going to do it for you!

MILES Why do I even bother? It's not like-

C41 Shh. Eyes on the prize, er, sky. Whatever. Bird now, talk later.

MILES Fine.There's a long silence. 

[sfx: forest ambiance for a prolonged period]

[The three of them sigh at varying points.]

[sfx: bird song, a glitch, static]

FELIX Bir- rd?

MILES What are you talking about, there's nothing there!

C41 I mean, I'll still give you the point.

FELIX Sorry, sorry, I... eyes were playing a trick on me there.

[sfx: prolonged forest ambiance]

MILES Sooo... uh, this is getting boring fast.

C41 "They who question the sanctity of Bird-"

MILES Not what I meant! I just meant...

FELIX There does seem to be a disturbing lack of birds.

MILES Well... uh... we could play 'I Spy'.

FELIX No, no. We can't allow the shine to wear off that quickly.

[sfx: retrieving from a bag, clicks]

MILES I feel like binoculars are cheating.

FELIX Eh. Using available resources.

C41 Does it count as cheating if there aren't any birds to see?

MILES Okay, but if there were.

C41 But there aren't.

MILES Okay, but if one shows, he can like-

FELIX And it may not end up being worth the hypothetical, if our luck continues.

MILES Just making conversation.

[sfx: prolonged ambiance]

MILES So... how about this weather?

C41 Really?

MILES What? It's called small talk, ever heard of it?

C41 Sure I have. My sources tell me that it's nothing remarkable. In fact, that seems to be the whole point of it, yes?

MILES Well, I guess... not everything needs to seem 'remarkable' to be... worthwhile.

C41 Sure. Take yourself for example.

MILES You know what-

FELIX You know, I believe that might be a backhanded compliment, Officer Abbott.

C41 How dare you.

FELIX Meant nothing by it, my voltaic friend.

C41 Then you know what's good for you.

[Felix chuckles.]

MILES Yeah, right, tough guy.

C41 I'm sure I don't know what you mean. I can be intimidating, that is, when I'm not asleep in my-

FELIX Nest!

C41 What?

FELIX Nest. Up there, on your left, riiiight- There.The group's eyes land on a large nest in a nearby tree.

MILES You think there's any in there?

FELIX According to what I've learned, the season would be right for quite a few baby birds.

So, I mean, if there were... to be... lots of baby birds... I should probably get a closer look. For... research.

MILES And I could help with your research. I mean... I could help you count.

FELIX Oh, no, I mean that's uh...

It'll be quite the climb to get there, so I wouldn't ask you to-

MILES Pssh. What are friends for? You said earlier you weren't feeling so good, anyways, so like... I can go check on those birds. For science.

FELIX Oh, no, I feel fine, thank you. I think a climb might actually do me some-

MILES Here, you hold Cally. I'm climbing.

FELIX Good.

C41 Wait, what? Also, it's Cal.

MILES I'm gonna go see those birds.

[sfx: footsteps running off]

FELIX HEY! NOT FAIR.

You stay right here, Cal. I've got a tree to climb.

[sfx: footsteps running off]

C41 Well, it's not like I'm going anywhere- Wait, wait! Doctor Couvillion? Officer Abbott?! Felix? Miles? Oh, the Commander is going to be so mad at you!beat, meek...Guys?

[C41′s BOOT-DOWN JINGLE PLAYS]

***

[Alex and Athena laugh.]

ALEX No, no, you're kidding me. Stuck?

ATHENA Completely! Okay, okay, so you have to understand, Patroclus C? It's a freezing cold rock. A moon.

ALEX Nothing homey about it?

ATHENA No! No redeeming qualities! We used to call it the Snowball. So, so, so: there I am, and my sister is just screaming bloody murder with her tongue stuck to the side of the transport.

ALEX And did someone lose a tongue that day?

ATHENA Somehow, no! I had to run back to the house for hot water and leave her there, and I swear her tears were frozen to her cheeks by the time I got back and we managed to get her off the thing! God, it was awful. So the chilly mornings around here? They're nice.

ALEX And you've got the charming anecdotes to prove it, starshine.

Oh, is... is that okay? If I call you that? It's just... it came to me, and I thought it suited you. But if you don't like it-

ATHENA Oh! Oh, no, I... it's fine. I like it. It's sweet.

ALEX Okay. Okay, good.

I just figured, you know, it might... we're gonna be out here for a long time. I want to be friends with you guys, with... you. If that's what you... all want too.

ATHENA I think I'd like that, Alex. 

Can I ask you something?

ALEX Sure, if I can ask you something after.

ATHENA Oh?

ALEX Yeah, no, I had like... a question or whatever for you too, but you totally, uh, you go first.

ATHENA Okay. Sure. So, uh... here's the thing. How do you... how do you know how to find the course?

ALEX ... What?

ATHENA How do you know where we're going?

ALEX I thought you were military. They don't teach you the way-

ATHENA Not exactly. How do you know where we need to go?

ALEX Oh. Oh I... okay. I think I get it. Well, I... it started off as trial and error, right? Even when I was just picking up the patterns in my games, or anywhere else, I just would have to take what I saw and turn that inward into something I could say was the truth.

So when I had to start figuring out how pieces of the world and their patterns sorta... fit with other pieces of the world into a bigger conversation, it... I mean it wasn't easy. I don't even wanna say it was comfortable. But it was something I could be confident in, at least.

And, these days, if I don't feel confident in it... I mean, I don't feel confident in it all the time, that's actually what I should've led with. Because, like, how could I be? When things, patterns, don't add up sometimes, it feels like something is lying to me. But at least I've been doing this long enough, that I know that I don't have to trek back and learn the patterns from square one anymore. I can... take it in backwards steps.

I can seem like I'm confident in what needs to happen, and then maybe some part of me can take that little signal boost and make me feel confident. And then, if I feel confident, maybe I'll find the pattern I didn't know in the first place, and that'll feel enough like the truth to me. It'll be enough to get us by. To get me by.

But... that's just me. Sometimes I think everyone has a different way of listening for the truth, you know?

Is... is that what you were asking?

ATHENA Uh-huh. Your turn.

ALEX Okay, now, tell me the truth on this one, Romero: do you actually need to record all of those logs?

ATHENA I'm sorry?

ALEX Dude, do you have to actually do them, or is it just like your diary?

[Athena laughs.]

ATHENA Hey! What's that supposed to mean?

ALEX I mean, no judging-

ATHENA I'm the chronicler, sir, that's my job.

ALEX Alright, Officer, alright. I'll take your word for it. But if you ever wanna try out some new monologue material on something, or someone who isn't a comms, you know where to find me-

ATHENA Yeah, yeah, I'll keep that in-

[sfx: a tree branch breaking]

[Miles and Felix scream]

[sfx: a thud]

ATHENA (CONT'D) Mind. Should we be... running about this?

ALEX Running fast, Romero.

***

[sfx: forest ambiance, a campfire]

FELIX, MILES (in unison) Owwwwwww.

ALEX You two... are going... to be.. the death of me.

FELIX, MILES (in unison) Owwwwwwwwwwwww.

C41 Yeah, yeah 'ow'. Traitors.

ALEXHold still... for just a second.

FELIX Once more, with feeling?

MILES Sure. Why not?

FELIX, MILES (in unison) Owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

ATHENA Officer Athena Romero recording. Still Day 28. Second first aid stop of the day. We had a tree incident. Or a gravity incident, involving a tree, I guess.

C41 You two are lucky you didn't break a leg. Or that I didn't get carried off by some dinosaur, leaving me there like that, Felix! How could you?

FELIX I... I... I'm sorry, I'm so weak-

ALEX Ah, save it, Couvillion. Not like you need your strength for much else. Speaking of which-

I'd like to propose a toast. To some time off, to finally making it to the rendezvous point where we await our booty, and to... I don't know, to no more falling out of trees, and no more backwards steps.

FELIX Here, here!

ATHENA Cheers!

MILES Cheers.

C41 Bon appetit.

ATHENA So, Cal, when can we expect for the shipment to get here?

C41 Oh, in about... three-

(distorted and ragged)

Four- three, three,- expect, no, three, seven, no, no, no expect, no, three, two, two- ERROR, retrieval denied, ERROR- ERROR, no, two three-

ATHENA Miles? Are they okay?

MILES Cally? Cal? What's wrong? Come on buddy, hello?

FELIX What is this?

MILES I don't know, they've never done this before, I-

[C41′s BOOT UP JINGLE PLAYS]

C41 Bon appetit! Sorry, you were saying? Oh, right, the shipment. Should be around three days.

MILES ... Cal? You... you okay? You weren't messing with your code again, were you?

C41 And if I was?

MILES Cal-

C41 Kidding, kidding. Joke, funny, haha. No, I wasn't, I swear. Probably just a brief malfunction, whatever it is you're talking about. I feel great!

MILES Okay. If... if you say so.

C41 But I am, like, suuuper tired, gee, I think I need some rest, okayeveryonegoodnightbutnotthetraitorswhoabandonedme! Kisses!

[C41′s BOOT DOWN JINGLE PLAYS]

ALEX I think that's the cue for everyone got some rest, huh? Sleep in tomorrow?

FELIX Oh, I'll drink to that.

ALEX Then let's go for lights out, booboo crew.

[sfx: retreating footsteps]

ALEX If you need to do a log, starshine, just make sure to put the fire out when you're finished, alright?

ATHENA Always do, Alex.

ALEX Yeah, you're right. You always do. Goodnight.

ATHENA

Goodnight.

[sfx: retreating footsteps]

ATHENA (CONT'D) You know, I... I don't even know if I have something I need to talk about tonight. I'm exhausted from the journey, and you already know all about that, HQ.

I don't know. Seems like trouble follows us wherever we go, but at least that's something to count on.

But like I said, I think I'm going to try something new tonight. I'm feeling inspired. Tonight, I'm just going to look up at the sky, and I think... I think I'm going to look for a pattern that feels true.

From Ophiuchus-22, this is Officer Romero, looking up, and signing off.

[sfx: bird song, a glitch]

***

ANNOUNCER Micro-Cosmos: A Science Fiction Podcast.

This episode, Looking Up, was written by Lauren Tucker, edited by Luka Miller, and directed by Jesse Smith, Zyrel Thompson and Lauren Tucker. It starred Jesse Smith as the voice of Athena Romero, Jackson Rossman as the voice of Miles Abbott, Luka Miller as the voice of Alex de la Cruz, Kaleb Piper as the voice of Felix Couvillion, and Pippa van Beek-Paterson as the voice of Cal. Original music by Julia Barnes, and sound editing by Tobias Friedman. Be sure to stay tuned to our feed for upcoming episodes from the new backpacking intergalactic adventure from Futuristic Trail Mix Productions. Enjoying the show, and want to give us a boost? You can support us by rating and reviewing us on iTunes, or wherever you get your podcasts, or telling a friend about us.

[THEME MUSIC FADES IN] ANNOUNCER Futuristic Trail Mix Productions presents Micro-Cosmos: A Science Fiction Podcast. [THEME MUSIC FADES OUT] [sfx: button press] ATHENA Hey, HQ. It's Officer Athena Romero, with Crew #0137-F. I'm transmitting from... North 54 degrees, West 109 degrees, in a moment of alone time. Camp's not too far, I just... wanted to come out here to record. We were up so, so early, but we made really good time getting our travel in for the day. And... I don't know. I felt like being introspective. I know that's rarely a good thing to be, for people of our situation... but sometimes it can't be helped, I guess. We're nearing what Doctor Couvillion calls the temperate forest region of the planet. Oh, uh, Felix is... fine, by the way, in case you were wondering. I know I haven't talked about him a lot for the last week since his little run in with Mercutio, and in hindsight, that was probably a little alarming from your perspective. But, no. He's, um... just been very focused on his work. Ever since our encounter with that little... strange... cat lizard dinosaur thing, he's taken to a pretty enthusiastic approach of figuring out what it actually is. You know, what is eats, how it behaves, it's characteristics. Thus, he's not been his usual social self, but he's had what I guess you'd call a breakthrough. He's named it. The species, I mean. Varanus concolor. Apparently he's determined that it's a new species of monitor lizard. Exciting stuff. Miles and Cal have been sorta... tense, the last little bit? I don't know if Miles is still mad at them about that terrible, terrible prank or just for being, you know, Cal. I like Cal. And Miles. Honestly, I do. I think they're almost a little too similar to get along sometimes. I get that. I've been in the same spot for most of my life. I only recently figured out how to sort of... stop taking my own reflection personally. [sfx: fingers drumming on comms, pacing footsteps] ATHENA (CONT’D) Alex is good! If you're wondering. You know, morale and all. We've been talking a lot, since we're sort of the only ones not in our own world. Well, I guess we're all in our own world, that's sort of our job, but... 

[Athena laughs.] ATHENA (CONT’D) Literal humour, Athena. Good one. Anyways, she's nice to talk to. Leadership skills to boot, in case you didn't already know and needed someone to sing her praises. I think I'd be more than willing to sing her praises. So... the mission's going very well. Everyone is healthy and accounted for, and we're absolutely on track to get to our shipment drop-off point. Comms and tech and climate are all nominal. We're okay. We're okay.

[sfx: bag shuffling as she picks it up, footsteps] ATHENA (CONT'D) Oh, by the way, before I head back. It's my birthday. I don't know if that's something I should mention. Just thought... I don't know. I don't expect the others to notice, or even know at all, really. But it's nice to acknowledge another year, you know? I'm certainly not spending it where I would've expected to be if you had asked me on my previous... thirty birthdays. Anyways. Yes, it is my birthday, and I kind of miss home, and also I kind of don't, and also being here is present enough. So, I will celebrate by breaking open some of the candy in my bag, and getting some sleep- FELIX, ALEX SURPRISE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! [Athena laughs.] ATHENA Guys! What are you doing?

ALEX Oh, come on Romero. You didn't really think you were going to get it past us, did you?

ATHENA No, I wasn't meaning to-

ALEX Oh, don't bother backtracking. You're busted.

FELIX There's no real party, or, presents, or... anything that would make this a proper birthday because of our circumstance, of course, but...

ALEX But an ambush was the least we could do.

FELIX The Commander and I only found out when she was conversing with Cal, inquiring of the database today's points of interest, or else we would've...

ALEX Done more than an ambush.Alex observes Athena, who's just standing there, staring at the two of them and grinning. But, I don't know. Seems like the ambush worked out pretty well. Try to smile less, huh?

ATHENA Heh. I, I mean... this is really sweet of you guys, I appreciate it.

MILES Appreciate what?

[sfx: footsteps, tapping on a screen] [C41′s JINGLE PLAYS] ATHENA Oh, uh, hey Miles!

MILES Heeey Athena, guys. What's up?

FELIX Did we...?

ALEX Nope.

FELIX So we forgot to...?

ALEX Yep.

FELIX Dammit.

ALEX Well, when you assume...

C41 Oh, um! Happy Birthday, Athena!

ATHENA Oh, uh, thank you Cal. Anyways, I was thinking we could get to bed early-

MILES Crap, it's your birthday?

ATHENA ... Yeah.

MILES I am so so sorry, I had no idea, I must have like, missed the memo, but-

ATHENA No, no, Miles, it's okay, I promise. I didn't say anything, and so how would you know? Spending it away from home, I wasn't really sure what to do, it's kind of hard, but...I just got busted by the Commander, so... [The crew laughs nervously.] MILES Happy Birthday.

ATHENA Thanks.

MILES You're welcome. Yeah, uh, actually, Cal and I forgot something back at our setup.

C41 We did?

MILES We did. The thing. We need. We need that thing, Cal, uh... we will be back... later. [sfx: footsteps walking away]

[C41′s JINGLE PLAYS.] FELIX Well, who wants to get this party started and play some cards?

***

MILES Caal! Why didn't you tell me it was Athena's birthday?

C41 I didn't think it was that big of a deal. It's just another day of the year, which... happens to be the day that Athena was born. You can congratulate her on still being alive, like you did, and then move on! Didn't seem that important to me.

MILES Yes, it's a big deal! It's like you said, it's the day someone was born, not just another day. Come on, Cal! Remember when Em and I made a huuuge deal about it on the anniversary that I created you?

C41 By chance, do you mean Doctor Macey? If so, then unfortunately, yes I do remember. It was very loud. If not, I haven't the slightest clue who 'Em' is.

MILES Yes. Her. Doctor Macey.

C41 Okay whatever. Anyways. Do continue on with what you were saying. It's proving to be really entertaining.

MILES Oh, I'll show you entertaining.

How did you not know that birthdays were important? Seriously, there's even a song about them. I taught you better than that.

[Miles sighs.]

MILES Cally, I didn't mean it like-

C41 It's Cal. And no, you're right. Why would something the O Great and Powerful and All-Knowing Miles Abbott made be so inconsiderate and dumb?

MILES Seriously, Cal. I didn't mean it. You know how I get.

C41 Yeah?

Oh, just drop it.

[C41 lets out a long series of scoffs and huffs in the following silence.]

C41 (CONT'D) ... Miles?

Miiiiiiles...?

MILES Caaaal....

Caaaaaaaal.....

C41 Miles- MILES Cal, I need to make Athena a birthday present!

I don't even know what she'd like, let alone what I could make her! There's like, nothing even worthy of being a gift on this planet.

[sfx: Miles snapping.]

MILES (CONT'D) What do I have? What do I even have? What does our camp have? I need to find something. Anything. I'll make it work. Cal, help me look. Please.

[C41 snorts.]

C41 Oh.

Oh, you mean actually help.

[sfx: a buzzing noise of C41′s form]

C41 (CONT'D) Um... well there are some big batteries that Alex didn't need over there, she left them this morning with her equipment. There is a... There is a... it looks like... is that a plastic fork? I really hope that isn't used. You all are a mess. And, um... what's that box, over there? What's that?

[sfx: footsteps, objects being knocked over]

MILES It's, uhhh... Chocolate. And... more chocolate. A gift from Emily, I... forgot I had these.

C41 Huh. A... whole box, huh? Of chocolate? What could you even make with those?

MILES I don't know, okay? I don't even know like, maybe I'm overreacting. Athena didn't tell us because she's not at home, or whatever-

Wait. Cal, what, um, what does Athena's home have?

C41 What?

MILES Where she's from. What's it like?

C41 Patroclus C? Well, it's-

[sfx: a long glitch]

C41 (CONT'D)- Patroclus C. A moon in orbit around more well-known terrestrial body Mirana Dunis. Patroclus-C is known for it's industrial prosperity and plentiful resources, as well as it's freezing conditions.

Notable landmarks include it's few geysers. All imported plant and animal life have adapted to the cold climate, however they take refuge in the steamy geysers that provide both water and heat- MILES Okay, Cal. That's enough, thanks.

[sfx: the same glitch, a zap]

C41 Oh, ouch. Eugh. Why did you let that happen? You know I hate that mode!

MILES I'm sorry! I'm stressing a bit here, if you haven't noticed.

C41 Yes, I'm well aware.

MILES Anyways. I... I think I have a plan.

C41 That's never good.

MILES Let's just hope this turns out. Mmm.... a decent start. ***

FELIX Have any... fives?

ALEX Go fish. [sfx: drawing a playing card].

ALEX (CONT'D) Got any queens?

FELIX Yes, yes. Queen of stars.

ALEX Thank you! Got any threes?

FELIX Go fish.

[sfx: drawing a card]

ALEX So close.

[sfx: approaching footsteps]

FELIX (with his mouth full) Better luck next time. Do you have any-

ALEX Want us to deal you in, Romero?

FELIX Athena? Hm. Cannot believe you were still doing work on your birthday.

ATHENA What's the name of the game?

ALEX Go fish. Do you play?

ATHENA I like to think cribbage is more my forte but... sure. Deal me in.

[sfx: cards shuffling]

ATHENA (CONT'D) Who's winning?

ALEX Me. I've won three matches.

ATHENA And how many has Felix won?

ALEX We've played three matches.

[Alex and Athena laugh.]

FELIX I am beginning to suspect her a cheat.

ALEX Can't help having an eye for this stuff.

ATHENA For what, counting cards?

ALEX I wish. Patterns. Got any kings, Athena?

ATHENA Go fish. Is that technically cheating, then? Patterns?

[sfx: drawing a card]

FELIX I believe I can call it cheating if it makes me feel badly about myself.

ATHENA Fair enough. Felix? Any fours?

FELIX Go fish. See, that felt perfectly fair.

ALEX Doc, I said patterns, not x-ray vision. You keep accusing me of cheating, I'm gonna start to take it personally.

FELIX I harbor suspicion, not accusation. Commander, do you have any aces?

[Alex sighs.]

[sfx: passing cards]

ALEX Dishes and comets. Happy?

FELIX Yes. Athena, do you have any sixes?

ATHENA Yeaaah. Here you go.

[sfx: passing cards, movement of pairs]

ALEX Feeling better about yourself?

FELIX Yes. Very.

ATHENA Jeez, you're already on track to win.

ALEX Felix, should I start repaying you all that whining?

FELIX I-

MILES (distant) DOES ANYONE HAVE JUMPER CABLES?

[sfx: stumbling, approaching footsteps]

FELIX Speaking of.

ALEX Uh... no, I don't think so. Maybe you should ask Cal?

MILES (distant) No. That's okay. I'll use the transport hawser. That should work... just as well if not better. I'll... I'm gonna go get that. Bye.

[sfx: retreating footsteps]

ATHENA That's... that's for... emergencies, what do they need that for-

ALEX My guess? Nothing good.

FELIX Commander, do you have any twos?

ALEX No, but I do have a Petty Officer who needs their marbles back.

[sfx: standing, retreating footsteps]

ATHENA Alex?

ALEX (O.S.) I'll be right back!

FELIX It's her turn, actually. Which one of us should go next?

ATHENA It's my birthday. Got any sevens?

***

[sfx: shuffling]

MILES I got something! Not cables, but... almost even better.

[C41′s JINGLE PLAYS]

C41 You're... actually doing this?

Oh... Okay. Even if it may be sliiiightly dangerous? Not that I care or anything-

MILES Look, I just can't sit back and do nothing for Athena's birthday.

C41 Yeah, but I think it would be better to guarantee everyone's safety than... You know, possibly blowing us up and setting everything on fire.

[sfx: metal chain drops]

[Miles sighs.]

MILES I guess that's true. I just don't want to disappoint her.

ALEX You're not disappointing her, kid.

MILES Huh?

Oh. Hi, Commander.

ALEX Wipe that sad look off your face. Even if you didn't know, she's happy that you're at least thinking about her right now.

[sfx: footsteps, shuffling, sitting]

MILES I... guess that's true. But I want to make her something. That's what I specialize in.

ALEX Fair enough. I guess I just didn't know you guys were this good of friends.

MILES I don't know that we are. It just seems like the kind of thing I should've tried for, I guess. We've got so much time to spend together and I don't want you guys thinking I'm cold and ignoring you all just because I get wrapped up in crap and get away from myself and especially lately with everything going on with Cal-

ALEX Hey. We don't think that. And I'm not just saying that, either. What were you planning on doing?

MILES I- ... Well, if I tell you, it would ruin the surprise.

ALEX Okay, okay. Do your thing, fix-it guy.

[sfx: getting up, a few footsteps]

MILES Hey, Commander? What if she doesn't like it?

[sfx: footsteps stop]

ALEX Remember what we talked about, kid. Make it from your heart, and she'll love it.

MILES O-okay, Commander... Thank you.

ALEX No problem, Miles. Always here to help. Let me know if you need anything else, yeah?

MILES Mhm! Now, I... I gotta get this show on the road.

ALEX Cal, keep an eye on them for me.

C41 Will do, Commander.

ALEX Good luuuck!

[sfx: retreating footsteps, tent closes]

C41 Well, that surely was-

MILES Alright Cally! We have some major business to attend to!

C41 -motivational.

MILES Okay, so I'm thinking... What if we melt the plastic fork? Like, all the way, and then, and, and then shape it around to make a base for the volcano geyser thing?

C41 That sounds incredibly dangerous. And like it would be highly amusing to watch.

[sfx: a whirring]

C41 (CONT'D) And according to my calculations I am correct on both counts. Do it.

MILES And... then we can put the chocolate in- Hold on, do we have anything to keep the chocolate melted?

C41 Hm. Probably not.

MILES Dammit, okay. That's fine, that's cool, uh... We can hook it up to the batteries someway to keep the heat constant and the launch device powered, that's fine, I can do that...

This is going to be a piece of cake. Let's go, Cally!

C41 How many times to I have to tell you? It's Cal.

MILES Mhmm, yeah. Let's just kick this baby in the teeth.

C41 Wh... what?

MILES It's an expression. Like, "let's blow this popsicle stand"? Or... "let's get this show on the road"?

C41 I don't understand how that could be related to either of those meanings.

MILES Whatever. I am gonna get this thing started, and it's going to be great.

[sfx: prolonged noises of tinkering and contstruction, a zap of electricity]

[Miles yelps.]

[C41 laughs.]

MILES Not funny!

[sfx: more sounds of construction and tinkering]

MILES Aaaaand there! Done. Finished. Phew.

C41 That looks...That... looks...I mean, um...That looks so good!

MILES You think?

C41 Yeah, I think she's-

ALEX (O.S.) How's it looking in here?

MILES Yeah, I think everything went great!

ALEX Perfect!

[sfx: Alex claps]

ALEX (CONT’D) Well, grab it and let's go; we have a birthday to celebrate. Take Cal and we'll meet her and Felix at that clearing. We're doing a little more celebration for Athena.

MILES Okay, Cal. You heard the boss; let's get going then.

C41 Yuuup.

MILES You know, I’m pretty proud of this.

C41 As you should be, Miles.

***

[sfx: approaching footsteps]

MILES HEY! Hey, guys I'm back!

FELIX Hello- oh. Oh wow. What...

ATHENA Miles... what's all this?

MILES It's, uh, it's your gift!

ATHENA Oh, Miles, really you didn't need to do that, that's super sweet, but-

MILES Oh, it's... it's just a little... something... electrocuted myself a few times making it, but- Happy Birthday!

ATHENA Oh. Oh, wow, that's really something, Miles, I love it!

What is it?

MILES It's a geyser. Like... you said. Well, actually you didn't say, but I did some digging and your... your home plant has... geysers, yeah? So it's like a little piece of home.

A geyser.

ALEX A geyser.

ATHENA Oh! Yes! A geyser. Of course! That's really thoughtful, Miles, you, uh... you shouldn't have! So it's like a... trinket! Or a little... a sculpture!

ALEX Oh... just you wait.

MILES Well, it's for more than just show.

Heh. Bet you've never seen anything like this before.

FELIX I'm quite sure I have not.

[sfx: setting down the present, the geyser bubbles and erupts pathetically, with a crackle]

[Miles breathing heavily.]

MILES Ta-dah!

ATHENA Ohhhh, wow, that's... that's so cool. Was it... was it supposed to melt like that?

MILES It was not the intention but apparently... that doesn't matter now-

[C41′s JINGLE PLAYS] 

C41 Evidently.

[sfx: more crackling]

ALEX Oh, okay, is this thing going to blow, Miles? Like actually, really blow?

MILES Shouldn't. It's a possibility... but it shouldn't.

ALEX Cal?

C41 Probably not? It'll be fine! Maybe Miles should get a little closer to shield the blast just in case.

MILES DON'T YOU RUIN THIS BY TRYING TO GET ME KILLED!

C41 Who, me? Never.

[sfx: the crackling and bubbling stops]

ALEX Alright, okay, okay. That was very cool. Right Athena?

ATHENA Right!

ATHENA (CONT'D) Look Miles, I really appreciate this, it's very, very sweet and I just hope you didn't feel like you had to do this, or anything-

MILES No, no, no. I wanted to. I mean... you were around to... keep me calm when I thought we were gonna get eaten in the woods. I didn't want you to think I didn't care, and... I wanted to make something nice for you. Normally I have more stuff to work with than forks and batteries and... chocolate.

FELIX Real chocolate?

ALEX Yes, real chocolate. Not now.

FELIX Ugh, and it's all on the grass, and... what a waste.

ALEX There will be more chocolate. Actually. Felix?

[sfx: receding footsteps]

[Alex and Felix whisper as they retreat.]

ATHENA Um, okay, but... Anyways. Thank you, Miles. That was a lot of fun. And I hope you didn't actually electrocute yourself.

MILES Oh, don't worry, it's not the first time.

C41 They're not joking.

MILES More of a shock than anything.

ATHENA Doesn't sound great for your health either way.

MILES Well, heh, yeah, I mean- Hey, wait a second. Wait what's-

ATHENA Huh?

[sfx: candles burning, approaching steps]

[Alex, Felix, Miles and C41 begin singing “Happy Birthday”]

ATHENA (overlapping) Oh, my... guys, what are you... that better not be our only fruit cake-

ALEX Come on, blow out the... flare candles. Make a wish.

ATHENA Okay, okay!

[sfx: blowing on candles, a glitch]

[sfx: candles burning]

[Alex laughs.]

[Athena hums in confusion]

[sfx: blowing on candles, a glitch]

[sfx: candles burning]

ALEX Come on, Romero. All in one go, now.

ATHENA Right. [sfx: blowing on candles, candles extinguishing]

[The crew cheers.] ALEX Happy Birthday. I'll clean up Miles's present later.

[Alex and Athena laugh.]

FELIX Time for cake!

[Felix leads Alex, Miles, and C41 in singing “For She’s a Jolly Good Fellow”]

FELIX  Cake! ***

[THEME MUSIC FADES IN]

ANNOUNCER Micro-Cosmos: A New Science Fiction Podcast. This episode, "A Little Piece of Home", was written by Zyrel Thompson and Lauren Tucker, edited by Luka Miller, and directed by Jesse Smith, Zyrel Thompson, and Lauren Tucker. It starred Jesse Smith as the voice of Athena Romero, Jackson Rossman as the voice of Miles Abbott, Luka Miller as the voice of Alex dela Cruz, Kaleb Piper as the voice of Felix Couvillion, and Pippa van Beek-Paterson as the voice of Cal. Original music by Julia Barnes, and sound editing by Tobias Friedman. Be sure to stay tuned to our feed for upcoming episodes from the new backpacking intergalactic adventure from Futuristic Trail Mix Productions. To follow the show and find transcripts, you can find us on Twitter, Tumblr, and Instagram as @MicroCosPod. Questions, comments, and concerns can be emailed to us via [email protected]. Find more information on the show on our website, microcospod.space. Thank you for listening.