#mattlings

a death in the family

I like to think of cover band matt at the mercy of the mattlings more than them being at the mercy of him. Its instinctual to assume its a similar dynamic at play that matts been in before, like they're his proxy jays that he torments but I think he's his own proxy jay and he is their proxy jay. he's their sad old man who got to bask in jay's radiance for a milisecond 2 decades ago. he tsktsktsks away at the drums and soaks up their validation. they drag him around like a corpse. sometimes he bites back. sometimes they genuinely play and have fun they are friends. but they're like fandom friends. they talk about one thing most of the time and its also the very thing that brings him the most pain and most joy in the world and he wants to own it wholly but he can't because fandom exists and he's just a drop in an ocean he tries his best to standout in. none of them Get It. but being a fan of jay mccarrol is his identity and these are the only people he can keep in his life. he loves them but he resents them so much. resignedly sighs and keeps the beat