#matila

FILM/TV CHARACTERS I SEE MYSELF IN PART 6: 

Deena Johnson (Fear Street)

Peeta Mellark (The Hunger Games)

Jo Harvelle (Supernatural)

Peter Parker (The Amazing Spider-Man)

Matilda Wormwood (Matilda)

Peter Quill (Guardians of the Galaxy)

Ziggy Berman (Fear Street)

Dean Winchester (Supernatural)

Behold

Annnd here we have a wild Yandere lmao

This is one of the bullies in my story (btw my new story is about Bullying)

Her names Matila and she’s just straight 

Mathilde Kschessinska and Tsesarevich Nicholas, 1892 + Princess Alix of Hesse and by Rhine, 1891

“Nicky stayed for a long while after his departure. I read his diary, which he brought with him. In the diary one day in particular interested me, this was 1st April, where he wrote about Alix H. and about me. He likes Alix a lot, he told me about this earlier, and I am starting to seriously be jealous of her.”

- Mathilde Kschessinska diary, 21st April 1892

“I have already loved Alix H for three years and constantly hope to marry her one day, God willing! The following year I fell very much in love with Olga D [Princess Olga Dolgorukaya], but that however has now passed. And since the camp of 1890 until now I have been madly (platonically) in love with little K [Mathilde Kschessinska]. What a surprising thing our heart is! At the same time I never stop thinking of Alix!”

- Nicholas’ diary, 1st April

Mathilde was Nicholas’ ‘girlfriend’ before his engagement to Alix of Hesse. She could sometimes be a very jealous and, later, ambitious woman. Whenever she referred to Alix, the word jealous was always in the sentence: ‘This was joined by an awful jealously towards her...’ (2nd May 1892). Although she did genuinely have strong feelings for Nicholas and during their relationship was simply a teenager/young woman in love, in some diaries one can the beginnings of the calculating woman that she would later become (at least in regard to men and her connections with the Romanovs): ‘I know well that this will not be enough for me, I will want more, this is my character.’ (4th July 1890) and ‘Still I will insist on my way, no matter how much effort it will cost me!” (8th January 1893)

In the end, it would be Alix, his true love, who he married. Nicholas told her all about the relationship, after he told her she wrote: “what is past, is past [...] I want you to be quite sure of my love for you and that I love you even more since you told me that little story, your confidence in me touched me, oh, so deeply”

After Alix finally accepted his proposal, Mathilde and Nicholas’ relationship ended. As Helen Azar (who is a very valuable source as she has access to many many primary documents that we all could only dream of seeing) said: