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To aid men who read their sites, the g0ys and the Man2Man Alliance have created guides to help men experience same-sex activity. These guides have plenty of good information in them, and have helped many men including me. However, I thought that there were some blind spots in both of these. So this blog has decided to make its own guide.
This is meant primarily for âstraightâ guys who want to explore their same-sex attraction. However, LGBT-identified guys who are tired of the âgayâ world (or are repulsed by it) are also invited to read along.
Again, this is meant to supplement the guides provided by the g0ys and the Man2Man Alliance. With all three of these guides, Iâm sure that you will be unstoppable.
Please note in this page, the phrase âmale-male sexâ doesnât refer exclusively to anal. It refers to any and every sexual activity possible between men - mutual masturbation, frot, anal, oral, intercrural sex, 69ing, etc.
If youâre trying to trick a guy into doing anal, THIS GUIDE IS NOT FOR YOU.
If youâre going to use this information to help convince a guy that theyâre âgayâ, THIS GUIDE IS NOT FOR YOU.
If youâre interested in neither, read on.
Do Your Homework
In writing this guide, Iâm assuming that you read most of the articles linked in the page âFor âStraightâ People (but not exclusively). If you didnât, I strongly recommend that you go back to the page, some of the articles attached, then come back. At minimum, I recommend three articles from the blog, three from the g0ys, and three from the Man2Man Alliance. If youâre Christian, I also recommend reading the first six articles in the âScriptural Commentariesâ page.
In saying this, it might seem like Iâm spoiling your fun. There is a reason why Iâm asking you to do so much reading.
In having male-male sex, you will be coming toe-to-toe with the power of modern sexual philosophy. It is a convoluted and contradictory philosophy, with all kinds of rules and regulations for âstraightsâ and âgaysâ. It seeks to constantly reinforce itself at every opportunity, and works hard to bring rebels back in line. If it ends up destroying those under its power, it merely shrugs and carries on.
Anything like that requires intelligent and well-calculated resistance. You will need to know what youâre dealing with, and that knowledge canât be superficial. Those articles will help ready you for the system youâll be facing. The more the read, the better off youâll be.
As such, before you take any action, you should probably abandon identifying yourself as âgayâ or âstraightâ. After all, through your actions, youâll be rebelling against modern sexual philosophy. You canât rebel against it and use its labels at the same time. Instead, identify just as a Man, a normal and regular Man. That will make things much simpler for you, and will be one of your greatest weapons, as we will discuss later on.
At the same time, realize that youâll probably know much more than your sexual partners. Youâll know that same-sex activity is natural and normal. They wonât, which will affect how they interpret male-male sex. You will need to be their guiding light to a new conceptualization of sex. You canât do that if you arenât prepared to do so.
While weâre on the topic, letâs establish some other ground rules.
Because âgayâ porn is so pervasive, and because much of it features anal, that porn might inform your expectations on same-sex activity. Throw all of those away, because they will be useless for this. The content here will explain non-âgayâ homoeroticism, which bears little resemblance to âgayâ homoeroticism.
âGayâ homoeroticism is focused on results only. Itâs driven by the mantra that relationships exist for the sake of sex. It is focused on getting sex by hook or by crook, particularly anal. Itâs also focused on getting as much sex as possible, in the shortest time possible. Contacts are made solely on the possibility of speedy sex. For those immersed in âgayâ homoeroticism, they establish what they want quickly, and get down to business immediately. Once the deed is done, thereâs no perceived obligation to develop the contact into a relationship.
Non-âgayâ homoeroticism is entirely different. For that kind of eroticism, sex exists for the sake of relationships. Itâs focused on making the journey enjoyable, rather than obsessing over results. Itâs much more playful and casual, and doesnât force things if it doesnât feel natural. It thrives on spontaneity and fluidity. If two men have sex, the purpose is to bring ultimate closeness to the relationship, and expressing affection in the rawest sense possible. As such, sex is not a guaranteed outcome of these relationships.
Thatâs not meant to be discouraging. While sex isnât guaranteed, most guys are attracted to guys on some level. So the odds are overwhelmingly in your favor.
Think of it like tending a field. When you put seeds in the ground, youâre not going to see produce right away. Farming takes patience and effort. It will take time for the seeds to grow, and you canât stand on the sidelines. You have to pay attention to your crop, constantly watering it and caring for it. It wonât be in vain though. In a short time, youâll start seeing buds sprout up. Those buds will soon turn into shoots, and before long, full produce will abound all over the field.
The point is, like farming, non-âgayâ homoeroticism takes time and effort. Because sex happens in the context of relationships, youâll have to take time to develop them. Plus, thereâs no way to predict how long the process will take. It could take a few days or a few months, depending on the circumstances and the people involved. However, if you put in the effort, youâll see some measure of results.
Lay The Groundwork
This first point is important. If youâre looking for a friend to get close to, you might think of exploring the âgayâ world and community. I donât recommend that. If you do so, be very careful. Itâs not necessarily because of the people in there, as much as the underlying culture.
Remember what I said before. In âgayâ homoeroticism, relationships exist for the sake of sex. Additionally, as far as the âgayâ world is concerned, only anal sex is real sex. If youâre looking for a stable relationship without anal, you probably arenât going to find it there.
There are LGBT-identified men who donât conform to âgayâ culture, and who might completely avoid anal, but they might also be few and far between. Furthermore, as long as they exist in the âgayâ world, its culture will always exert some influence on them. Even if you find a âgayâ man who initially doesnât do anal, voices in that world will cajole him to do it, and those voices might win out.
Iâm not saying to avoid LGBT-identified men completely. Again, Iâm saying to be careful, and be discerning. If you find a âgayâ man who isnât interested in anal, youâll have a double challenge. Not only must you teach him that same-sex activity is natural and normal, youâll have to get him away from âgayâ culture and its obsession with anal. Be prepared for that.
Otherwise, you can look among whatever âstraightâ friends you have. Theyâll be better able to meet you where you are. I realize that such a suggestion seems crazy. In that case, remember what this blog said before - that at least 50% of people carry same-sex attraction inside them. This means that every other man you meet can experience same-sex attraction, and thatâs a conservative estimate.
Thus, looking for a homoerotic friendship doesnât require an expedition. Itâs more like looking through your own backyard.
The thing is, âstraightâ guys usually donât make it obvious if another guy strikes their fancy. They donât act like some âgayâ guys who practically announce their interest. Thatâs partially because they donât want to be labelled âgayâ, with all the stereotypes that come with it. However, thatâs also because of the relationshipâs nature - itâs a friendship that grows more intimate (and more erotic) with time.
So whether with existing or future âstraightâ friends, carry on those friendships as you otherwise would. Go out with them, talk with them, exercise with them, play games with them and so forth. Visit each otherâs homes, discover your friendâs likes and dislikes, and go on adventures together. Itâs during these times that your friends will signal if they want to get closer, and where you can signal the same.
For beginners, hereâs a handy way to signal interest while weeding out your pool of sexual partners. This comes from the G0ydar article, but Iâm repeating it here because itâs effective. In normal conversation, make it clear that anal turns you off. You donât need to mention it in terms of âgaysâ, because their community and anal are so welded together, most people will make that connection on their own. You also donât need to make a big deal of it, but instead just casually mention your opinions. Say something like âI love my friends too, but it doesnât mean I want to enter himâ, or âI canât see how anyone would want to play with someoneâs butt...too filthy for meâ, or anything that puts anal play in a critical light.
Two things will happen. Guys who also dislike anal (whether âstraightâ or âgayâ) will make a mental note of that and will relax in your presence, or might even seek out your company. Theyâll know that if they end up getting close to you, nobody will get penetrated. At the same time, âgaysâ who adore anal will take your remarks personally and will keep their distance from you.
If that seems confusing, know that most guys arenât firmly opposed to getting close to another guy. Theyâre opposed to the spectre of anal in same-sex activity. Because anal is so associated with same-sex intimacy, they prefer skipping that intimacy completely. Meanwhile, anal is one of the most sacrosanct topics in the âgayâ community. Even a mildly critical remark will make some âgaysâ go ballistic.
However, if youâre looking for âstraightâ guys to respond âI want you nowâ, youâll probably be disappointed. Signs of attraction are more subtle than the brazen displays common in âgayâ homoeroticism. You just need to pay attention, and to tune up your powers of observation. If you know what to look for, it wonât be hard to see who wants to get sexual.
Touch is one of the strongest indicators of attraction. When a guy feels comfortable enough with another guy, he wonât limit the contact to chatter. If a guy touches you at times that are unnecessary - like when youâre just talking - itâs definitely a sign of friendliness. If those touches become noticeably frequent, consider the possibility that heâs interested. If those touches become longer in duration, or become varied in location, the probability rises that heâs interested in more.
Horseplay is another indicator of attraction. Guys usually rough play with guys they really like as friends. They often do so with guys theyâre familiar with, though thatâs not always the case. As the Man2Man Alliance aptly put it, attraction feeds healthy male aggression, and vice-versa. Itâs an innocent pretext for prolonged physical contact while learning each otherâs strengths and weaknesses. Pay attention if the horseplay becomes regular. Itâs definitely a sign of attraction, and might signal that he wants to fool around in other contexts.
Exhibitionism also signals attraction. Iâm not necessarily talking about stripping completely naked in front of you. Iâm speaking of more subtle forms. For example, if the opportunity arises, he might take off his shirt in your presence. Or he might talk about his latest exploits at the gym, and show off the latest body parts he worked on. Or he might find some reason to lift up his shirt and expose his abs. Or as a joke, he might flash his penis or butt at you. Through these actions, heâs trying to make you notice his body. If these are frequent occurrences, itâs a pretty good indicator that heâd like to show you more, much more.
As it turns out, sex talk could be a sign of attraction in itself. That would include discussing masturbation habits, descriptions of oneâs sexual experiences with girls, or trading sexual fantasies. Itâs a blatant expression of oneâs horniness, and that heâd like to share some of that with you. If that talk becomes frequent, or if physical contact is made during it, he might want sex to be more than a conversation topic.
If youâre interested too, feel free to reciprocate as you see fit. If a guy touches your shoulder while talking with you, respond by touching his arm sometime later. If he playfully tackles you one day, do the same thing to him on another day. If he shows you how he worked on his arms, talk along similar lines (if you work out too). If he takes off his shirt around you, maybe do the same thing sometime later. Be sure to be subtle too, and your friend will get the message loud and clear.
Of course, these are only a few signs, and there are more that arenât mentioned here. Sometimes, it might not be any kind of sign. It might just be a sexual âvibeâ you perceive from a guy, and if you do discern one, itâs probably accurate. Plus, while all these are likely signs of sexual interest, itâs up to you to tell if those really are sexual signals. Just exercise your powers of perception, and as you use them more, they will guide the way.
Lastly, you might feel that all of these sound like everyday male behaviors. Indeed they are normal male behaviors, and thatâs the point. Iâm not identifying them so guys can start curbing them. Instead, Iâm showing how natural same-sex attraction really is. Because itâs natural, itâs impossible to completely eliminate, and it will find some way to express itself. Whether observers realize it or not, guys may often express their same-sex attraction through these behaviors. As such, while this isnât always the case, these actions can be the first steps to sexual interaction. When same-sex attraction is impossible to suppress, thereâs no logical reason to restrain it so strongly.
Continuing to Up The Ante
When you perceive that another guy likes you, you probably wonât be satisfied with leaving it at that. Youâll want to capitalize on it, and develop it into actual sex. The aim is to steadily develop the intimacy of the relationship, so that sex becomes a natural outcome. How you proceed depends on the guy involved, and the circumstances youâre working under.
Guys might differ on the method of escalation. For example, there are some guys who they will engage in explicitly sexual escalation. In this case, itâs perfectly clear to both friends what theyâre heading for. Your friend might respond quickly to physical contact, and that response would be unambiguous expressions of affection (hugs, caresses, groping, kissing). As time goes by, youâll feel more comfortable expressing your affection more openly. As a result, the inevitability of sex becomes ever clearer. It would be hard to disguise the behavior as anything but sexual.
Meanwhile, other guys prefer less obvious ways. They prefer having sex with guys âaccidentally on purposeâ. As such, they increasingly express their affection for you while doing these activities. Sex happens within this context, where while those activities generate genuine fun, they are also thinly disguised conduits for eroticism.
For example, two guys might sleepover one night, and both strip down because they say that they sleep naked. While feigning sleep in bed, wandering hands might lead to each otherâs penises, and a mutual masturbation session begins. Or two guys might wrestle, and because it makes them hot, both might progressively strip to their underwear or total nudity. In that case, penises might end up enmeshed against each other, and a frot session begins.
Guys might also differ in how much they participate in the escalation. Both friends might equally participate in it. With them, the escalation becomes mutual, where both engage in a âtit for tatâ exchange. One might take off his shoes, while the other takes off his socks. Another takes off his pants, while the other takes his shirt. One might massage a guyâs back, and the other reciprocates by massaging his upper legs. In that case, you donât have to do that much, because you two are both doing the work.
Other guys might be more passive. Blatantly seeking same-sex intimacy might be too âgayâ for them to do. That doesnât mean that they donât want sex as badly as you do, because they probably do. In fact, they might blatantly signal that theyâre into you. Itâs just that, given the rules of cultural masculinity, they canât see how they can openly seek same-sex intimacy and keep their dignity. However, they also donât rule out receiving affections from another guy, or being led by him into potentially sexual situations. While he might not want to take the lead, heâll be more than willing to follow.
As a result, heâll rely on you to take the driverâs seat, and be the one who moves the escalation forward. Youâll have to be the one who comes with ideas, and the one to make the first move. Heâll likely put up some resistance for the sake of appearances, then quickly relent and follow your lead.
For example, at that same sleepover, you might ask if you can sleep naked on his bed, because thatâs what youâre used to. Your friend might raise some concerns, but ultimately let you do it. A few minutes later, he might quietly do the same thing. Or during wrestling, you might decide to take off some clothes, while your friend decides to keep his on. A few minutes later, he might take off some clothes too, and match your state of undress.
As you can see, there is no uniform approach to escalation. It completely depends on who your friend is. Youâll need to be nimble, adaptable, and discerning. Youâll need to perceive your friendâs positions, and read whatever signs that they give you. Youâll know how to proceed from there.
As such, there are many activities that help facilitate escalation of intimacy. To me, communal nudity is among the best. Nudity creates a deep bond that can be developed into a sexual one. Plus, if you and your friends are comfortable being naked in one setting, itâs much easier to be naked in others. Most of all, if you or your friend want to get sexual, there wonât be much clothing around to stop you.
Thus, if you and your friend happen to use a communal shower room, feel free to use it naked. If the shower room has curtains, keep the curtains open, and talk with your friend in his stall while naked. If you feel up to it, you can walk up to his stall and talk to him while nude. While in the locker room, freely talk with your friend while naked, even facing him while doing so. He might not join you in being naked the first time, or even the first few times. However, when he sees that you donât care about being naked, soon he might not care either.
If you want to do sexual stuff in that shower, make sure it wonât cause problems. A few decades ago, guys could jerk and suck each other off in a communal shower without much complaint. Thatâs simply not the case now, so youâll have to be perceptive. In some showers, you can do stuff and not get caught. In others you might get caught, but nobody would care because anal isnât involved. In yet others, you might get caught and be charged with indecency. It entirely depends on the attitudes in the establishment, and itâll be up to you to figure out what to do. Just make sure your fun doesnât earn you a rap sheet.
Plus, communal nudity doesnât need to be limited to locker rooms. If youâre alone with your friend at his house, see if you can strip down your underwear or completely nothing. If heâs at your house, just hang around in your underwear, and in the future, test wearing absolutely nothing. As usual, they might not join you, and may even raise concerns. Soon however, they may relax about seeing you naked, and may let you see them naked too.
Wrestling is also a good way to simultaneously have fun and get closer. It allows heavy physical contact while testing each otherâs strength. The physical contact creates a bond thatâs hard to break. Plus, since it involves heavy exertion, clothes will have to come off. As layer after layer is taken off, youâll end up wrestling in your underwear. If your friend feels close enough to you, you might end it up doing it naked. If your friend is turned on by the wrestling, a telltale erection will definitely emerge. Make it clear that the erection hasnât escaped your notice, though in a joking way so you donât embarrass him. Then, the door is open to mutual masturbation, frot, or other stuff.
Massage is another way to up the ante. If itâs done in a tone of mutual respect, guys usually wonât mind getting a massage from another guy. In fact, the friend might actually appreciate the favor. It signals that he trusts you enough not to hurt him. Furthermore, because of its nature, clothing will have to be removed. So as you move from area to area, ask to remove clothing that will get in your way, and heâll comply. Eventually, he only have underwear on, and if he trusts you enough, heâll let you massage him completely naked. Heâll inevitably get erect, at which point you can offer to jerk him off and relieve his tension.
As a way to break the ice, watching porn together is another activity that can lead to sex. One day, get a laptop and an isolated space, and turn on porn that both of you will like. Because itâs porn, both of you will get aroused. Say that the porn makes you want to jerk off (because itâs true), drop your pants and begin masturbating. Heâs going to be horny too, so heâll do the same thing either immediately or a few minutes after you. Then, see if you can trade hands, where he jerks you off and vice versa. Then the porn will become mere background noise to the main event happening between you. Next time, you might not even need porn to do it all over again.
You may or may not have noticed a running theme. All the activities mentioned involve some kind of undress. That should show you what other activities can escalate the sexual tension, because these certainly arenât the only possible ones. Really, any activity that combines two or more of these elements,
Involves physical contact, preferably heavy contact
Requires some kind of undressing
Creates an uninhibited atmosphere
can make the bonds of friendships deeper, and bring them closer to sexual expression. It could lead directly to sex, or be a strong prelude to more private events later on. It could be a game of shirtless water tag, or a game of strip poker. It could be as simple as a round of Truth or Dare. Be creative and spontaneous. When opportunity comes knocking, open the door with all gusto.
The Risk of Upping the Ante
Now, there is something that must be said. None of these behaviors come without risk. All of them may make people try to label you âgayâ. It could be observers doing so, trading rumors among themselves that youâre deeply closeted. If theyâre religious or gay-identified, they might loudly insist that your actions are âgayâ, and angrily demand that you identify as such. Because of this risk, you might restrain yourself from doing things you want to do. You simply fear giving anyone a reason to call you âgayâ.
To be honest, thereâs nothing you can do to stop that from happening. Itâs simply the world we live in, where ever more things are interpreted as signs of being âgayâ. Since itâs impossible to avoid, you just canât care about that possibility. Donât fear it either, because fear gives that accusation power it doesnât deserve. Instead, focus on how youâll respond to the suggestion. Your answer will determine how that accusation will affect your self-image, your overall quality of life, and how your peers view you.
When someone accuses you of being âgayâ, flatly and calmly deny it because youâre not. Youâre not lying. Remember what was recommended earlier - that before you started down this journey, you should abandon identifying as âgayâ or âstraightâ. Instead, you should simply identify as a Man. So when you say that youâre not âgayâ, your statement is 100% true. Keep in mind that those labels represent identities and not sexualities. Identities can be assumed or rejected at will. So for that accusation to be true, you have to agree with it first.
Plus, by denying that youâre âgay/LGBT/queerâ, youâre not denying that youâre into guys (too). Make that clear in your answer . As far as youâre concerned, your attractions are not the issue, because you already know youâre into guys (too). Instead, the issue is that an unwanted identity is being imposed on you. Itâs an identity that ties in with âgayâ culture - drag, imitation of opposite gender mannerisms, anal - that you have no interest in. In fact, itâs an identity that totally pivots on anal, which you canât stand. Most of all, it reinforces the notion that same-sex activity is abnormal and aberrant, which you know isnât true.
When you disagree with it so much, why should you voluntarily take on that identity? In truth, you donât even need those labels to define yourself. You can do that perfectly well without them.
If they insist that you should call yourself âgayâ, ask them to explain the wordâs many inconsistencies, like
Its contradictory meanings
How, if the word only refers to sex, a âgayâ man can be validly called âstraightâ acting
How mutual masturbation, oral and frot are âgayâ sex, but only anal is real âgayâ sex
If âgayâ only refers to sex, why swimming, musicals, and pop music (which are nonsexual phenonema) can be validly labelled âgayâ even by the âgaysâ
Given all of these contradictions, how can the word âgayâ only refer to sex? If it doesnât, why should you base your identity on it? I guarantee that they wonât be able to give a good answer.
At some point, your accusers will see that theyâre losing, and will give up for the time being. They probably wonât give up though, and may try again in the near future. In that case, stand your ground and stick to your guns. You are asserting who you truly are, and you donât need their labels to do it. People around you will have to recognize that you are unique. The âgaysâ and the religious will have to admit, albeit begrudgingly, that youâre different.
Through such concerted action, youâll be doing many things. First, youâll be challenging the dominance of modern sexual philosophy. It is a very jealous system, insisting that people see sex through its own lens. Thus, most people spend their lives trying to shoehorn themselves into being âgayâ or âstraightâ, which both represent obtuse sexual categories.
By adopting neither label, youâll leave modern sexual philosophy in total confusion. In its mind, a person who isnât âgayâ must be âstraightâ, and vice-versa, but nobody can be neither. It doesnât let people realize that there are other ways to conceptualize sex. By identifying only as a Man, youâll demonstrate that people can validly exist outside of its labeling system and its rules. Youâll show that modern sexual philosophy doesnât have a monopoly on sex.
Furthermore, youâll show other guys that the word âgayâ need not have power on them. For fear of being labelled âgayâ, many men have hemmed themselves into a steadily shrinking box. They have driven themselves into utter misery as they ran away from wearing briefs, shunned supposedly âgayâ sports, and avoided musicals like the plague. They felt like they had no choice, since they couldnât see how any man could successfully deny being âgayâ, yet openly love men or those activities. Through your example, they will see that it can be done, and that they can do it too.
Even while youâre making your friendship more intimate, a friend might suggest that the activities are somewhat âgayâ. In that case, truthfully say that youâre not âgayâ, and that youâre just doing what you enjoy as a Man. Or just pay it no attention, because after all, theyâre involved in the supposedly âgayâ activity too. When they get an erection from all the fun, call it out in jest. Say something like, âYou're calling me âgayâ but you're the guy with the stiffy? The pot calling the kettle black, donât you think?â They wonât be able to respond to that, at least not effectively.
Again, these are guidelines to help you. In your own life, you might find additional methods to fight the accusation of being âgayâ. To do that however, youâll need to know modern sexual philosophy inside and out. Thatâs why I said that you should read the âFor âStraightâ Peopleâ page. That will give you links to see what makes the philosophy tick.
How to Have Sex With A Guy and Not Get An STD
So the escalation worked, and it seems that you and your friend will end up having sex. Most guys avoid it because they think all male-male sex is disease ridden. In truth, itâs relatively easy to lower STD risk to miniscule levels. These are simple rules that will take the risk down to almost zero.
Totally avoid anything anal. Despite anything that the âgayâ leadership preaches, the anus is not a vagina. It never has been, and it never will be. Thus, thereâs absolutely no reason for you to shove your penis up your friendâs butt, or vice-versa.
However, avoidance isnât limited to anal penetration. You should also avoid any anal-oral contact (like rimming), and anal-digital contact (like fingering or fisting). The anus isnât a vagina, so it wouldnât make sense to do those actions anyway.
Hereâs the dirty little secret of the âgayâ community: most of its diseases are spread through anal play. Itâs what helped drive the rapid spread of AIDS during the 1980s and 1990s. Itâs probably what drove in the jump in STD infection during 2016. As such, condoms have virtually no effect on stopping STD transmission. Thereâs nothing to gain from playing in your friendâs anus, or him playing in yours.
By avoiding anal play, youâve already cut down STD risk by a lot. With other forms of sex, itâs harder to spread an STD or receive one. Through that one simple action, youâve made one large step in preserving your health and that of your friend.
Be careful with oral. Make no mistake: oral sex doesnât come close to anal in terms of risk. However, it does have risks that canât be discounted. This blog isnât saying that you should avoid oral sex. Instead, itâs saying to exercise care in deciding when to do it and how.
A few decades ago, oral wouldnât have been as risky, because there werenât as many STDs in circulation. Those that existed were much more treatable and harder to catch. So guys received and gave oral as they pleased, and sometimes as the first sexual act done between partners. That was the case with this guy in the 1970s American South, as well as this man in a 1970s YMCA.
Unfortunately times have changed, and oral can transmit quite a few STDs. There are cases of HIV that have been spread through oral. HPV can be spread rather easily through oral, which can cause oral cancer. It can also spread syphilis, chlamydia, and gonorrhea.
If you and your buddy are having sex for the first time, I wouldnât recommend doing oral. Youâd need to know that your friend isnât carrying something that will harm you. Good communication is vital to facilitate oral. Ask in a way that preserves his dignity. This is a good example (taken from the g0y website): "Because I'm into dick2dick, it really isn't a big issue; --But have you had STI's or anything in the past or are still being treated -- that we might want to wait to clear up before doing more than some rod-rubbing & ball-bonding?"
Keep this in mind - if your partner doesnât have a disease, you wonât get one either. You canât catch what your partner doesnât have. This is why I recommended dealing with âstraightâ guys, because theyâre less likely to carry an STD. Since a change in quantity means a change in quality, âgaysâ are more likely to carry STDs, because theyâre encouraged to be more promiscuous.
Furthermore, donât be selfish. If you have an STD, let your friend know. This has to go both ways. If you canât trust each other to be honest when it counts, youâll be endangering your relationship. Do you want to live knowing that you infected your friend?
Plus, even if STDs arenât a concern, that doesnât mean the coast is clear. Even as guys go through their day, guys sweat in their crotches. As the Man2Man Alliance explains, âsome dysentaries can be transmitted through eggs borne in sweat -- and the eggs go wherever the sweat goes.â It explains further, âFor example: you're with a guy who's sweating, the sweat runs down his ass crack and picks up whatever fecal matter is on the exterior of his anus, and gets on his balls.â If he scratches his crotch, as most guys do, that can easily transfer to his penis.
Thus, Iâd recommend doing a blowjob at a specific time - during or after your friend swims, showers, and bathes in a Jacuzzi. The running water will cleanse the penis, which reasonably ensures that the skin isnât carrying anything unpleasant. A document from the website âStraight Talk for Boys About Sex with Malesâ puts it best: âthere is no real difference between having a finger or a penis in your mouth, if both have been freshly washed...The penis itself has no taste unless it is not clean.â While its advice on anal is highly questionable, its information on other sex acts is mostly accurate.
For more vital information on fellatio, please see this page from the g0y website, and read the subtitle âFellatioâ.
Remember that sex exists for the sake of relationships. I realize that I already said that, but Iâm repeating it for a reason. This phrase will help cancel out any remaining STD risk in your sexual behavior.
Outside of anal and oral, other forms of male-male contact are quite low risk. If the anus or mouth isnât involved in sex, semen will land on skin. If thereâs no open wound, skin is an excellent barrier against most diseases.
Note however that I didnât say no risk. Take frot as an example. Though the probability of infection is very low, frot can theoretically transmit pubic lice and genital herpes. Thus, itâs worth noting this quote from the Man2Man Alliance: âIf Men into Frot become as promiscuous as males into anal have been, Frot will lose its innocence and joy and become yet another vector for STDs.â
In the âgayâ world, a âgayâ man might have sex with several men in one night. If two âgaysâ hook up for sex, they may otherwise be strangers. They might have hooked up just because they liked each otherâs looks. As such, they had no relationship before sex, and may feel no obligation to establish one afterward. After sex is over, they may wipe each other out of their minds, and move on to the next conquest. That may happen several times in one night. In such an environment, even low-risk sex can be a conduit for STDs.
Thatâs why the above phrase is so important. Because of it, youâll realize that sex isnât the priority. Instead, relationships must take first place. Sex is what brings those relationships to their highest potential.
That mantra will make such promiscuity less likely. Since relationships are the focus, youâll be more judicious about who you get sexual with. Youâll think more about who you have sex with. As a result, even if you have sex with more than one guy, your activity wonât approach the levels reached in the âgayâ community. This assures that low-risk methods will remain low-risk.
What To Do During Afterglow
So you and your friend end up having sex. It might have been after an hot frot session, a good handjob, or some mutual masturbation. In the afterglow of the climax, you canât just say nothing about it and leave. At this point, your friend will need you more than ever.
Remember the ironclad grip that modern sexual philosophy has over millions. Remember that its central message is that same-sex activity is inherently abnormal. Up until that point, that philosophy might have an ironclad grip on your friend. So after the pleasure fades away, his head might fill with fear. Heâs just done the unthinkable - he just had sex with another man. In the world of modern sexual philosophy, he can no longer call himself a legitimate male. He must either repudiate the desires heâs just uncovered, or else identify as âgayâ (aka âabnormalâ) from then on.
If heâs Christian, he might believe that heâs just committed a grave sin. He might now believe that he is beyond Godâs mercy, and must await his judgement. He might think that he is now an abomination. Under such thoughts, he might even contemplate self-harm or suicide.
You need to reassure him that thereâs nothing wrong with him. You need to show him that his urges are normal, natural, and extremely common. You need to show him that his urges for men (too) donât impugn on his masculinity. You need to show him that his urges donât necessitate immersion into âgayâ culture, or experimentation with anal. You need to show him that God doesnât care how much he likes men (too).
Thus, you need to show him some of what youâve seen. Show him some of the contents of this blog, particularly the Scriptural Commentaries. Show him some of the pages from the g0y website. Show him some of the content of the Man2Man Alliance, especially those showing that sex between men is simply an activity that men do. Then, when he gets the point, watch as internal relief sweeps through your friend.
For pointers, look at this story and this story from this humongous catalogue of g0y stories. They do a great job of showing how you can educate your friends. And continue seeing each other after that. You two might become each otherâs support, and together you might help other men become free to pursue their own desires for men.
You two had sex because you like each other a lot. In another world, you two could do it without much afterthought. But given the power of modern sexual philosophy, thatâs simply impossible right now. Through sex, you have to save others from becoming condemned in their own minds. Itâs part of the altruism that natural same-sex activity helps support.
Conclusion
As you might have gathered, this guide doesnât exist just to improve your seduction skills. Instead, it introduces a different way of life. It exposes a world where same-sex activity is just as valid as opposite-sex contact. The sex model it promotes inculcates a different mindset and outlook in those who follow it. It is one where masculinity is not a monolith, where sex exists for the sake for relationships, and where same-sex bonds are viewed as sacred.
In many ways, the values of this sex model run counter to those which dominate today. This is not to be taken lightly. Instead, it shows why it is suppressed so much. It also shows why it must be fought for. It promotes valuable principles - community, fraternity, equality - which we need so badly today.
I hope that this guide strengthens you. I hope that it is one that you will consider valuable. Most of all, I hope it is one that you will use to the full.
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It was great witnessing my julez @scorpion_leader do what he loves for someone he loves. It's so dope how lil things can create something great!! Good luck on ur romantic journey julez!!!!! #romance #dance #man2man #stepoutonfaith #atlanta #piedmontpark