#lokiau

“An orgasm,” you repeated. You showed him the book you were reading and pointed to a sentence.

She reached her end rather quickly, the line said. His thrusts were precise, purposeful, and in no time at all they had a powerful orgasm wracking through her body. Loki lifted a brow at the nature of the book. He had read a lot of erotic literature in his lifetime and even kept a few volumes on sex in his personal library. This was not one of them. “Where did you get this, little bird?”

The moniker had stuck after he discovered your talent for singing. It was a month after he rescued you from the Void. You, a slight thing raised on a very conservative island, had been visited by the Timekeepers for saving an old lady from drowning in the ocean. The Nexus event caused you to be taken by the TVA, and some struggling with a hasty keeper resulted in your pruning.

A group of men who were trying to get pass Alioth had found you in the Void and decided to use you as bait. Loki heard your cries on one of his patrols to ensure nothing was amiss. Following it to the source, he happened upon you tied to a wrecked car with tears streaming down your face. Alioth was upon you, the men trying to skirt their way around. Loki made quick work of ending their lives before untying you and bringing you back to the Citadel.

“I found it in He Who Remain’s things,” you told him. Loki’s brows knit. After taking over authority of the Sacred Timeline, he and Sylvie had stored away the belongings of their predecessor. They were happy for quite some time, though he could always tell that Sylvie wanted something he alone could not provide. So, on a weary day after meeting with the Timekeepers, the two of them constructed a timeline that allowed Sylvie to live her life with her parents on Asgard. She promised to visit, but she never had. He supposed that was why he saved your life.

Running the TVA was fulfilling work, but it also got lonely in the Citadel. Day after day, night after night, the empty walls and halls of the stone building mocked his being alone. He wanted companionship, and he always thought finding you was a gift from his mother in Valhalla. She saw how alone he was and sent him someone he could live in harmony with, and live in harmony with you he had.

“Lokiiiii,” you sang, tapping his forehead. “Where did you go?” He loved your voice. You often sang when reading or showering or just prancing about the Citadel and Loki would always stop what he was doing to listen. There were times when you would just lie with your head in his lap and sing ballads while he read. You were, in all forms, a blessing to his life

“Sorry, little bird. What was your question?”

“Tell me what an orgasm is.”

Loki leaned back in his chair. He did not know how to broach this topic with you. You were intelligent, yet naïve. The island you grew up on never taught their girls about pleasures of the flesh. They only found out on their wedding nights—some in less pleasant ways than others. Considering this, he settled for a basic definition of the word.

“An orgasm is a sort of pleasurable feeling that occurs at the height of your sexual stimulation.” He paused to let that sink in. “Do you know what sex is?”

“Yes!” You wagged a finger at the book. “I read about it. That’s how people make babies.” Your head cocked to the side, as though putting two and two together. “Is that how orgasms are made?”

“They’re not made, they’re had,” Loki explained. “And sex isn’t the only way it can happen.” You blinked big, innocent eyes at him. “There are a lot of ways one can reach an orgasm, and not only by penetration. You can use your fingers or your tongue or-”

“I read that, but it confused me,” you told him. “You touch me all the time and I’ve never had an orgasm… I think. Have I?” You were referring to the times he would stroke your hair or rub your back when you got scared.

“Little bird,” Loki laughed. “If I had given you an orgasm, you would know.”

“Hmmm…” You snapped the book shut. “Give me one then.”

Loki felt his mouth run dry. “I… What?” He shifted on the chair, discreetly adjusting himself as his length hardened. Discussing this topic was affecting him in a rather stirring way. “You want me to do what?”

“Give me an orgasm,” you clarified. “Why? Don’t you want too?”

He would be lying if he said the thought had not crossed his mind. You had developed a deep level of intimacy with him in such a short time that it was impossible for his mind not to go there. Loki wanted more with you, from you, and was only holding himself back because of your innocence.

“It’s not that,” he told you. “I just don’t want to make you uncomfortable. I’ll have to touch you in certain places, and I refuse to take advantage of you.”

Your brow furrowed. “How is it taking advantage if I’m asking you to do it? I’m not a child, Loki. You’ve explained it to me and I understand what I’m requesting.” Loki lifted a brow. It sometimes slipped his mind how firm you were in your decisions. Your lack of sexual knowledge meant very little when it came to your maturity, and it was unfair of him to treat you as such.

“Okay.”

You perked up. “Okay?”

“Yes.” He shoved the documents aside and patted the space in front of him. “Come here.” You scooted over on his desk. Loki stood in front of you, blocking your view of the Sacred Timeline through the window behind him. He parted your knees and stepped between them. “Is this okay? Are you comfortable?”

“Yes, Loki. I’m fine.” Your tone was playful, teasing, and Loki could not help but smile. He gave you a peck on the nose that had you scrunching it in the most adorable way. “Are you going to kiss me?”

“Yes.” He tangled his hand in your hair at the back of your head. “Would that be okay?” You nodded, and he pressed his lips to yours. He could tell you had never kissed anyone before. Your lips did not move at first, so he guided you carefully until you caught onto the rhythm. It was then that he slipped his tongue into your mouth.

“Oh!” You jerked back, a hand over your mouth. “What was that?”

“My tongue,” he answered. “Did you not like it?”

“Umm…” You made a face. “It was a little slimy. Reminded me of a snake.” Loki bit back a laugh at the analogy.

“I won’t do it again. Come here.” He leaned down to kiss you again, ensuring his tongue did not go pass his lips. You seemed to enjoy it much more this way. Your body relaxed into his, pressing your torso into him. He felt your hardened nipples against his chest and grinned into the kiss. “Someone’s getting excited.”

He pulled away from the kiss to look at you. Your nipples peeked out through the blue material of your cap sleeved dress.. “Oh,” you waved a hand. “That happens when it’s cold.”

“It also happens when you’re aroused. Watch this.” He took a cloth covered nipple between two fingers. Gently, he began rolling it. Your head fell back with a groan. Loki used this leverage to place kisses on your neck, making you moan with each press of his lips. A specific spot close to your ear had you gasping and when he sucked on it, you suddenly cried out.

“Wait, stop!” He pulled back in alarm. You were staring down at your lap in confusion. “I think I peed!” Loki bit his lip.

“You didn’t wet yourself, little bird. You’re aroused. This is what happens when your body is stimulated.”

“Oh.” The look on your face was comical.

He placed a hand on your knee. “Can I see? Or do you want to stop?”

“No, I’m good.” You looked at him. “You can keep going.” With your permission, Loki moved his fingers up your leg. His hand disappeared beneath the skirt of your dress, reaching your underwear in no time. Once there, he pressed two fingers to the damp cloth. “Oh!”

“Darling?” Loki paused at your outburst. “Are we still good?” You nodded. “Excellent. Just breathe, little bird. You’re doing well.” His fingers stroked the outside of your underwear, getting you wetter and wetter with each movement. He kept a watch on your face for any signs of discomfort. When he saw none, he slipped two fingers inside your panties. The curls that met his skin were slick with your arousal. He made quick work of parting your lips to gain access to your clit.

“Loki!” Your hips bucked off the table, hands holding onto his biceps. “What is that? What are you rubbing?” Your voice was breathless with need. It hardened his cock even more and had his zipper threatening to burst.

“That’s your clit, darling. It’s a bundle of nerves that makes you feel good.” He pressed it, and you let out a sinful moan. “See?” You nodded, bringing your head forward to rest on his chest. Loki smoothed his fingers over your head before pressing a kiss to the top of it. “Let’s get you to that orgasm, yeah?”

“Yes, yes pleaassseeeeeee…” The word stretched into a prolonged plea as he slipped his middle finger within you. You were tight, virginal, and he wiggled his finger around to get you accustomed to the appendage. A little while later, he began moving the finger in and out. “That feels good,” you whimpered.

“Good,” he praised. “I’m going to add another. Tell me if it hurts.” He slowly added his index finger to the mix. You tensed for just a second, then relaxed for him to get it all the way in. A bit of thrusting and scissoring got your walls loose enough to allow him to move unrestricted.

“Loki…”

“That’s it,” he cooed. “That’s it, little bird. Just feel.” He moved his two fingers at a comfortable pace, using his thumb to rub your clit. You were gushing by this point. He knew his desk would have a little puddle of your juices once you were done. “Darling?”

“Loki, I’m-I can’t-”. Your head tilted back, brows knitting together. A sweat had already broken out on your forehead. Your hips, whether under conscious or subconscious control, were moving in time with his fingers. The obscene sounds produced by the thrusting had Loki’s mouth watering. He could not wait to taste you once you were done.

“Tell me what you feel, darling.”

“Pressure,” you whimpered. “Right here.” You pointed to your lower stomach. “I-I can’t. Loki, I’m-”

“You’re about to orgasm,” he filled in. “Just cum, darling. Give in and cum for me. Let me hear you.”

The most beautiful thing happened then. Your head was already tilted back, eyes closed in rapture. Loki kept a firm hand on your lower back to keep you close. Your fingers tightened and fisted in the sleeves of his robe. Those plump lips of yours rounded, forming a perfect ‘O’. Your walls clenched around his fingers, entire body going rigid as you fell over the edge. The wail that left your mouth echoed through the entire Citadel.

“That’s right,” Loki encouraged. “Sing for me, my little songbird. Sing loud.” He curled his fingers as you rode out your orgasm. When it was over, and your body relaxed, you opened your eyes and stared off into the distance. Loki waved a hand in front of you to get your attention. “Little bird?”

“Hmm.” You blinked dazed eyes at him. Your eyes darted down to the bulge in his pants. “What’s that?” You poked it, and he hissed.

“That’s me,” he told you, moving your hand from his little problem. “That’s how men get aroused.”

“Do you need an orgasm too?” you asked. Loki had to force himself to reply in the negative.

“I can take care of it myself, as can you, if the need arises again.”

You scrunched your nose up in thought. “Nah. It’s a lot of work. I’ll just come to you.” Loki chuckled.

“That’s fine by me.” He cupped your face with his clean hand. “Do you want to continue reading your book? You can sit here with me while I finish my work.”

“Nope,” you popped the ‘p’. “I’m hungry, and I need a shower.”

“I’ll tell you what. Go take a shower and get dressed. We’ll go to Paris for those crepes you like.” Your eyes danced with glee.

“Really?” He nodded, enjoying your excitement. “Okay! Thank you, Loki!”

“You’re welcome, little bird. Now go. I have some work to complete in the meantime.”

ooOOoo

It was about a week later that you sought Loki out with another question. You entered his room without knocking—for he would have locked it he wanted to be alone—and glided into the green and gold swathed bedroom. Loki was lying on his bed, propped on some pillows with a book in his hand. You crawled onto his bed and near him, and only then did he lift his arm so you could snuggle against his chest.

“Sleeping here tonight?” His eyes were still on the book.

“Yes.”

“Okay.” His fingers began playing with your hair. While he read, you let yourself look upon his face. You had thought Loki was beautiful from the moment you saw him. Even during your rescue, crying and being untied while he kept that smoky monster at bay, your first thought was for how handsome he was. The tall stature, dark hair and emerald eyes were reminiscent of the male lead in your book. It was what drew you in. When you were reading the steamy scenes, you often imagined it was you and Loki, and he was doing all those spine-tingling things to you.

That was what led you to his bedroom that night. You had separate rooms but it was not uncommon for either of you to visit each other’s and fall asleep. You were reading the second part in the series when your mind started running away with images of you and Loki. Suddenly, it was no longer Jacques throwing Harriet against the shelves, but Loki and you. The thoughts produced a throbbing deep within your core that had you stumbling to his room with need.

“Loki, can I ask you another question?”

“Anything, little bird.”

“Have sex with me.”

Loki choked. His green eyes turned to you, mouth opening and closing a lot like the fishes he had taken you to see at the Boston aquarium. You were not entirely sure he was breathing until he spoke. “That’s not exactly a question, darling.”

“Sorry,” you winced. “Loki, will you have sex with me?”

“Why are you asking this?” he wanted to know, and you could not blame him. Loki had not touched you sexually since that day on the desk, so the sudden request must have thrown him for a loop. “Is it that book again? Are you still reading it?”

“Part two,” you confirmed. “And yes, I am. I like them.”

“You understand sex in books is not at all like in real life?” he asked. “Literature tends to paint a very romantic picture of it all. The type of books you’re reading does that especially well, and people often grow to have false expectations.”

You mulled over what Loki said, then nodded. “Well, that’s why I want to learn. Teach me.”

“Little bird…” Loki hesitated. “Come.” He snapped the book shut, then maneuvered you both into a sitting position. His legs stretched straight out and you sat straddling his thighs. “What you’re asking of me cannot be undone. It’s also quite uncomfortable for women who have never done it before.”

“Yes, I know.” Curiosity had led you to find as much literature as you could about sex. You knew that you were a virgin, and you possibly had a hymen, and that could cause bleeding during your first time. You also knew that sex was supposed to feel really good. Loki made you feel good with just his fingers, and if the books were correct, intercourse was even better. “I read about it. I know what I’m asking.”

“Read about it where?” Loki quirked a brow.

You waved a hand. “I read your books when you’re not here. You have quite an extensive amount of material on sex.” If Loki had done half those things you had read, you knew you were in experienced hands. He would take care of you and do it well. “Will you do it?”

“I…I don’t know if I can,” Loki admitted. “Darling, you are gorgeous, and sweet, and I enjoy your company very much…”

Oh. Oh. Now you understood. You were so stupid to have not seen it before. His rescuing you was out of the goodness of his heart, as well as the need for company, but that was it. Your relationship with the god had grown throughout the time you had spent together. Loki was smart, sarcastic in a way that was hilarious and very protective of you. It was no real shocker that you had developed feelings for him. You had thought, stupidly, that he had felt the same for you. But you were wrong.

Loki did not care for you, because he was still pining over another.

“I’m sorry,” you told him, and the words came out as a sob that had his forehead creasing. “I made a mistake. You don’t like me; you still love Sylvie. I’m sorry.” You rose off his lap, shame and mortification burning your face.

“Hang on.” Loki held you fast by the waist, pulling you back into your seat. “How do you know about Sylvie?” There was a frown on his face. For a moment, you thought you upset him.

“Don’t be mad,” you started, causing his frown to deepen. “Mobius told me. He came to visit a day when you weren’t here and he slipped up and mentioned her. I pressed him to tell me, I’m sorry.” A myriad of emotions crossed his face. “Are you mad? Please don’t be mad.”

“I’m not angry with you, little bird,” he promised. “Though, I will be having a chat with Mobius.”

You gasped. “Don’t prune him!”

“I’m not going to prune him, darling. Mobius is my friend.” Loki’s hands found your hips, thumbs rubbing circles into the silk of your nightgown. Though you were fine with cotton, Loki insisted you have the best. “I did love Sylvie, but that was ages ago. Decades, if I had to guess, since time works differently here.”

“What happened?” you asked softly. Loki shrugged.

“She was not happy here. We loved each other, but she wanted her parents and the life that was stolen from her. I could not abandon my post here, so I set her free. There were no hard feelings involved.”

“That so sad,” you empathized. “Weren’t you sad, Loki?”

The corner of his mouth turned up in melancholy. “For some time, yes. I moped around these grand halls and neglected my duties until Mobius and B-15 gave me a reality check. After that it got easier. Relationships end all the time. It’s nothing new.” Loki tapped your nose. “Meeting you helped a lot. I had decided to close myself off to love until you came along. With you here, that became a difficult task. I cannot help but care for you. It would be annoying if it did not bring me such peace.”

You smiled at Loki’s confession. “Really?”

“Yes, little bird.” He kissed your forehead. “I cannot recall the last time I thought about Sylvie in that way since you arrived. Perhaps her leaving was for the best.” Loki grew quiet then. A thoughtful expression took over his face, black brows furrowing in concentration. You smoothed the creases of his forehead out with your thumb.

“You’re thinking very hard.”

“Do you really want this?” he asked suddenly. “Do you really want me? You understand that things would change between us, and our living situation could become quite strained if it were to end badly.”

“It won’t,” you promised. “I trust you, Loki. I know you won’t hurt me.” You placed your head on his shoulder. “I want you.” You initiated the kiss this time, winding your hands up into his hair and letting him control the pace. His hands moved to your lower back. He held you against him carefully, like you were glass, and then pulled away.

“We can try,” he told you. “If it hurts, let me know.” You nodded enthusiastically.

“Okay!” He chuckled at your reaction, then tugged on your nightgown.

“Can I take this off?” You removed it without another word, baring your naked body to him. Loki smirked when he noticed you weren’t wearing underwear. “Cheeky little bird.” He ducked his head to pepper your neck with kisses. “Did you know you were going to get your way?”

“I was hoping.” Your voice was light, breaths quickened by Loki’s lips on your neck. He kissed the spot he had marked the last time and started sucking anew. You gasped, back arching into him. His hand danced up your stomach and cupped your breast, kneading the flesh in a tantalizing manner. The combination of his lips and palm had you growing wet in very little time. You needed contact, friction, and found it by grinding your pussy against his thigh. The fabric of his sleeping pants brushed against your clit with every pump of your hips.

“Naughty girl,” Loki teased. “Are you trying to get yourself off on my thigh? Is that what you want?”

“No. I want you fuck me.”

Loki rolled you both over so you were on your back. Your head hit a pillow, and another was placed beneath your hips. “Little bird,” Loki growled. “Those are verydirty words. Did you learn those in that book?”

“Yes,” you murmured. Your hands went to his waistband to untie the string. Loki took ahold of your wrists and secured them at your sides.

“Patience.” He skimmed your collarbone with his nose, eliciting a shiver from your body. Loki released your hands to spread your legs and settled between them. His elegant fingers trailed down to the apex of your thighs, stroking the soft curls between your legs. You felt another gush of wetness when he entered you with two fingers. “We need to get you ready.”

Loki began opening and closing his fingers in a scissoring manner. You whined and squirmed on the bed as your walls were stretched and relaxed in repetitive motions. He moved a finger to your clit then, and your hips shot off the bed. “Loki!”

“Hold on, little bird.” He pressed a hand against your lower abdomen to get your hips flat on the pillow. “I must taste you. Stay still.” Loki kissed a line from your throat all the way down the front of your body. You giggled when he reached your bellybutton.

“That tickles!” Loki removed his fingers from within you.

“What about this?” He licked a long stripe up your folds. “Does this tickle?”

“No,” you moaned. “No, it feels good.” He slid his fingers inside you again. With his mouth on your clit, he moved his tongue and fingers in tandem until you were tugging his hair with the utmost urgency. Right when you were about to crest, he stopped. Your eyes flew open in disbelief.

“What?” Loki asked. “I thought you wanted me to fuck you?” He stuck his thumbs in the waistband of his pants and pulled them off in one fluid motion. His penis sprang free, and your eyes widened. The pictures you had seen and descriptions you read did not prepared you for this. “What’s the matter? You’re looking at my cock like it’s going to bite you.”

“It’s a little ugly,” you replied, then clapped a hand over your mouth. “I’m so sorry! I don’t know where that came from!”

Instead of getting upset, Loki barked out a laugh. “That’s the first time I’ve had that reaction.” He leaned forward until his forehead rested on your own. His lips kissed yours once, then twice, then he looked into your eyes. “Still want to do this?”

“Yes,” you whispered. Your heart was pounding in your chest, palms sweaty, yet the overwhelming thought in your mind was how much you wanted Loki. “Yes, I still want to do this.”

“Okay.” He braced himself with one strong forearm above your head. His other hand grabbed his shaft, pressing the tip of his cock against your clit. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head. A new wave of pleasure coursed through you with every circle of his tip, and your breathing sped up into a near pant. “Take ahold of me.“

“Huh?” You stared up at him through lidded eyes. “What?”

“Here.” He placed you hand against his cock. “Close your fingers around it. Good girl.” You were surprised to find that his hard length was hot and throbbed like a pulse against your skin. There was a big, blue vein spanning the length the looked two seconds away from bursting. “Now put it in.”

You looked at Loki with bashful eyes. “I-I don’t know how.”

“Don’t fret, little bird. I’ll help you.” His large hand encased your own as he aided you in guiding it to your entrance. Once there, he let go. “Just slip the tip in.” You brought him into you a little, gasping at the immediate stretch. It was a weird feeling. Not painful, but not pleasurable yet. You pushed more of him inside you experimentally, and this time he groaned. “Just like that. Good girl.”

“It feels weird,” you told him. “Is it supposed to feel weird?” Loki rubbed your clit with his thumb. Once again, you felt your pussy begin to throb with need. You needed more of him-all of him- inside of you. “Loki, I need-”

“I’ll take it from here, little bird. You did well.” He returned your hand to your side and placed his hand on your hip. The other was still above your head to keep his weight off you. “Kiss me.” You did, and felt him begin a rhythm. He would pull out just a little, causing an empty ache within you, then push right back in to quell it. Each time he pushed in he went a little deeper. Loki continue this method until he reached a distance inside of you that had you breaking the kiss.

“Ow!” You winced and pushed against his abdomen. “Loki, that hurts!” None of your books had described it like this. They mentioned discomfort, maybe a little soreness, but none had told you losing your virginity felt like being stabbed with a very tiny knife.

“I know, darling. I’m sorry.” His hips paused, waiting for your permission to go further. “Do you wish to stop? There are other ways I can take care of you. We don’t have to do this.”

“No!” Your fingers grabbed onto his shoulders. “I don’t want to stop. I just didn’t expect it to hurt so much.”

“Here.” He flatted a palm against your lower stomach. Green seidr flowed out from his hand and into you. The pain within you disappeared. All you were left with was the feel of him inside of you and the desperate need for more. “That should be better.”

“Much,” you agreed. “C-can you keep moving?” Loki pulled his hips back and thrusted in without another word. He was fully sheathed now. You lay beneath him with your eyes closed, basking in the feel of his thumb against your clit. It shocked you when, just a few thrusts later, rapture built within you. “Oh Gods!”

“There we go,” Loki grunted. “That’s what I wanted to hear. Tell me how it feels, darling.”

“S-so good!” you gasped. “Loki, so good!” You never knew pleasure could be this great. Every drag of Loki’s shaft against your walls had the feeling blooming anew. It was hard to believe this hurt a second ago, and you understood now why people wrote so many books about sex. It was like finding heaven and tasting hell all in the same go. You never wanted it to end.

“Feel this,” Loki murmured. He grabbed your hips and angled towards the right. Your entire body jerked. He hit it again, and again, and soon your body was contracted in one long, continuous stream of bliss. You knew he had to be hitting your G-spot. Some of the works you read mentioned it, but not all authors believed it existed. They clearly never had sex with Loki Laufeyson. He had no trouble proving its existence.

“You’re so tight now,” he groaned. “Fuck, I can feel your walls squeezing me. You’re close.” You were. Between the foreplay, thrusting and playing with your clit, Loki had wound your body to a point where the only end was release. You felt like you were standing near a cliff on a hot day, and the only way to reach the cool water below was to let yourself fall… fall… fall…

“Shit!” The curse left your lips before you could stop it. Your entire body felt like it was going to cave in on itself. Stars exploded behind your eyelids. A whine filled the air—high-pitched and screechy—and it took a while to realize it was coming from you. Your lower body squeezed for what felt like ages before it released. When your hips hit the bed again, Loki let out his own curse.

“Fuck.” His thrusts had long grown sloppy. “Fuck, fuck!” He pulled out of you like you burnt him and let his now flaccid penis rest on your stomach. A milky white liquid spilled out of the tip, pooling near your bellybutton. You reached down to touch it. It felt sticky, warm, and you brought it to your lips for a taste. You regretted it as soon as the salty taste burst on your tongue.

“Ew!” You cringed. “That’s disgusting.” Loki laughed.

“What did you expect it to taste like? Chocolate?” You frowned. Loki waved a hand to clean his seed off your stomach. “Better?” He rested his palm on your forehead, smoothing back the hair stuck to it with sweat. You leaned up to kiss him softly, passionately—like you would open your eyes at any minute and this would all have been a dream. When the kiss was over, Loki looked a little stunned. “What was that for?”

“Just to say thank you,” you told him. “For this. For making me feel safe and taking care of me. It was amazing.” Loki smiled at you, that wide grin that crinkled his eyes and stretched his lips up over most of his face.”

“My pleasure, little bird.” He rubbed his nose against your own. “Would you care to take a bath with me?”

Taking a bath with Loki did sound like a fun idea. Besides the sex, it was a step in the direction you wanted to go. However, your body was spent from the new activity, and you were quite sure your legs had turned to jelly beneath you. “Can we just lie here for a bit? I’m a little tired.”

“Of course.” Loki adjusted himself so he was on his back, allowing you to throw a leg over his torso and place your head on his chest. “I just started a new book,” he informed you. “Shall I read it to you from the beginning and we can continue it together?”

“Mhm-hmm.”

Loki kissed your forehead. He opened the book to the first page and began to read aloud. “No live organism can continue for long to exist sanely under conditions of absolute reality; even larks and katydids are…”

ooOOoo

Loki awoke late in the night from a rather disturbing dream. He reached his hand out for you, only to find your side of the bed empty. That made him sit up. His eyes roamed over the pulled back duvet and rumpled bedsheets with a frown. “Little bird? Are you in the bathroom?” No answer, and no sound from the en suite either. Loki sighed. He grabbed his discarded sleeping pants from the floor and set off in search of you.

It did not take long to find you. As soon as he stepped outside, he heard your voice and followed it to your old room. Loki lifted a brow. You had not slept in there since you had first asked him to make love to you a month ago. After that, your room had been delegated to a guest room and you had moved into his. Therefore, he was very confused to find you curled up in the centre of the bed with a book, wrapped in nothing but a sheet.

“Darling?” The song stopped. Your head lifted to him with a smile. “What are you doing here? It’s so late.”

“I couldn’t sleep,” you answered. “I went walking around and ended up here.”

Loki frowned. “Why didn’t you wake me?” He sat on the bed next to you, fingers brushing the fresh hickeys on your neck from your round of love making just a few hours ago. “I would’ve stayed up with you.”

“No, you were tired. You’ve been running around all week trying to stop Kang from making a mess of things. I wasn’t going to wake you. Besides,” you tapped the leather-bound book held to your chest, “I have my book.”

Loki ran a finger over the brown bindings. Dust coated the flat pad of skin. “This doesn’t look like the ones you usually read.”

“It’s not. But,” you sat up, clutching the book tighter to your chest, “I found something else we can try. Would you like to see?” Loki nodded. You were so excited to show him your discovery that it was impossible to say no.

“Sure, little bird.” You let the book fall backward so he could see… and his jaw dropped. Loki’s eyes roamed the page, then darted to yours. He knew what he was seeing and wanted to make sure you were looking at the same thing. “Are those…”

“Yes!” There was nothing but exhilaration in every fiber of your being. “Babies!”

A/N: A kiss from Loki to anyone who knows what book he was reading.

Still he was much less intimidating with bed hair.

“Nothing, the rain woke me.”

“Hm.” 

He opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling. “A storm is coming, it will make travel difficult.” 

“Isn’t Thor like god of storms or something?” You asked. 

Loki rubbed his face and snorted “God of Thunder mortal.” 

“He can’t stop the storm then?” 

“No, he’s not a weather deity.”

“Whose the weather deity?”

“Freyr.”

“Why didn’t we bring her with us instead?”

Loki seemed to find this very amusing. You didn’t understand why, but you did enjoy that something you had said had managed to make this terrifying god laugh humorously.

“Freyr is a God, not a Goddess.” He laughed again  “go back to sleep mortal. You will need your strength today.” 

You closed your eyes again, noticing the gap between the two of you had lessoned slightly. 

The next time you woke, he had gone.

                                                                       ***

You had been traveling in the cold rain for a few hours now, and had lost all the feeling in your fingers. You sighed and a large drop fell down your nose; you wanted to cry. You were cold and miserable, and the rest of the man faired the same, there was much less chatter today. The weather effected everyone it seemed. 

“We’re not far away now Miss.” Halvor said from behind you, noticing you starting to shiver. 

“Aye, we’ll be there soon enough” Volstagg agreed cheerfully from next to you. 

Volstagg it seemed, was immune from any dispirited feelings. 

“What’s the place called? Where we are going I mean.” 

“Deill Miss.” 

“How long will we be staying there?”

“Two nights I believe.”

“What’s it like?” 

To your surprise Volstagg sighed; 

“It will be an interesting visit. Tis but a small village relatively speaking, charged by a lady named Yrsa. Her father, Frode, used to be one of Odins top military strategist, and a close friend. Something happened and they fell out a long time ago, and Frode left the capital, taking his wife, children and some supporters with him. He never proved too much trouble, but he passed away and his daughter is now leader. There have been rumours of uprisings since Yrsa took charge, and apparent dalliances with the barbarians.” 

“The barbarians?”

“People who do not wish to live under Odins rule. They can normally be kept at bay, but a collusion with Lady Yrsa’s village and the barbarians could prove a more dangerous threat.” 

‘What happened? Between Odin and.. Frodo?”

“Frode. No one is sure” Volstagg shrugged “It’s not uncommon for… people to fall out with Odin, he does not always make popular decisions.” 

The main message you took from this was that you were going to be entering somewhere you weren’t particularly welcome, if they didn’t like Thor and Loki you doubted they would like you.  

“It is an important visit. If Loki is to become king one day, Norns help us all, it is imperative he makes a good impression. Or rather, amend his previous impression of being a reckless villain let we loose the trust of all our allies.” 

Yeah right. You doubted Loki had ever made a good first impression. 

 “It is important for other reasons too, if Thor and Loki can keep the peace it might curtail any thoughts Yrsa has of rebellion. Neither the king nor the Princes have toured outside of the capital for a while, and this tour is intended to sooth over any unease.” 

“Well, if they have hot water so I can have a proper wash and shelter so I can get out of this rain that’s all that matters to me.” You stated. 

Volstagg laughed, 

“That they will, Latte. And a feast to welcome the Princes, which is my personal favourite part!” He roared. 

Apparently your stupid coffee nickname had caught on. God you missed coffee. 

Thoughts of a caffeinated beverage left your mind however when you finally reached the village. From what you could see, the whole village was surrounded by a high wall with only one main entrance. The village walls themselves were besieged by thick foliage, with tall pine trees. 

Volstagg had said that it was a small village, but from what you could see it was anything but small. It was busy, with many people milling about and when they saw the prince’s progression they started to wave and cheer. They seemed pretty happy to see Thor at least, and there were cries and chants of his name. You guessed it was kind of like seeing a celebrity walking through your town. There were also a few curious glances your way, you weren’t too bothered, assuming they were probably trying to work out why you were with the kings progression when you were clearly not a solider nor dressed in Asgardian clothing.

Finally seeing woman and men not dressed in armour, confirmed your suspicions that the people of Asgard seemed to dress like they were in the medieval period on Earth for some reason. The woman wore long floaty dresses, and then men donned loose shirts and tunics. 

 People had started to come out of their shops and homes to wage the progression past. You grinned and waved back at some of them, which resulted in a few strange looks. 

Soon, the crowds started to thin as you rode past fewer and fewer houses or shops. You finally came to some metal gates in front of a large pathway leading both ways around a lake. At the top of the lake stood a pretty stone castle.

A woman on a high white horse was at the gates when you arrived. She had very long straight deep brown hair, with a large plat across the top of her head and two thick plats either side. She swung down from her horse when you got closer

“Lady Yrsa!” Thor called and jumped down from his horse too, followed by Loki and Fandral.

“My Princes.” Yrsa curtsied deeply. 

“No need for formalities! Please call me, Loki.” Loki took Yrsa’s hand and kissed it. 

Erm did you have to call him ‘ your highness’ then? 

She smiled at him graciously. 

“Welcome to Deill. I trust your journey here was not too arduous?” 

“Takes more than a little rain to stop me my Lady.” Loki winked. 

You were in awe at the scene in front of you. You were yet to see this charming side of Loki, although given that he was a prince he must have been brought up with some manners and decorum. It was in stark contrast to the way he had treated you for the most of your time here and it made you kind of irritated. He knew how to be nice he just choose to not act like that with you. 

“Come, let’s get you inside from the cold.” She leaped gracefully back onto her horse and the men did the same. 

She led you through the gates and the rest of the party followed. As you rode past the lake you noticed how the reflection of the castle shimmered in the water. You stopped as you reached the castle entrance and Halvor helped you down from the horse. 

“My men will take care of your horses and take them to the stables. They will be fed and looked after, rest assured.” Yrsa waved her hand in the direction of two men stood in the rain who nodded. 

You followed the progression into the castle, happy to finally be inside. You took in your surroundings, a large hexagonal entrance way, with high ceilings leading up to a glass dome above you. The stone walls were exposed, decorated with tapestries. 

“Your highnesses, I will show you to your rooms. My maid will take the rest of the men to their sleeping quarters.” 

You were too busy staring up at the high ceilings and walls and wondering how they had got the tapestries up there in the first place and if Asgardians had really big ladders to notice what was happening, and you started following Halvor without thinking.

“Halt.” Yrsa put her hand up in a stopping motion before you could go any further and asked curiously,

“Is that a… mortal?”

Is that a mortal? You pulled a face.  

Also how did she know you were a mortal you wondered. You figured it was one of those things, like when you went to other countries and they spoke to you in your native language, knowing you were not from their country based on your mannerisms. 

“Did you pick one up from your time on Midgard?”  She asked Loki.

First of all how dare she?

Loki smirked maliciously at you, as if he could tell what you were thinking. 

“No” He shrugged “she’s a stray.” 

“I fell through the convergence” you clarified, already sick of being talked at rather than to.

Yrsa raised her eyebrows in surprise, as if she couldn’t believe you could actually speak.  

“How…interesting!” She smiled quizzically “Why have you not sent her home?”

Thor and Loki shared a quick look between them, you would have nearly missed it had you not been glaring at Loki. 

“We tried, believe me but just she begged to stay.” Loki smirked.

Wait why were they not telling the truth about what happened? About Heimdall and him not sending for you? 

“Well actually - “You began, stepping forward.  

“I’m very tired, may we see our rooms now?” Thor suddenly spoke loudly.

You tried to catch his eye to shoot him a strange look but he purposefully avoided your gaze. 

Yrsa turend to him “Of course your highness, apologies.”

She then looked at you, “Mortals are very fragile and quick to sicken so I’ve heard, and they are so small and weak. This one is shivering, I shall allow it to sleep in chambers.” 

She looked at you expectantly, were you supposed to thank her for letting you had a bedroom? It seemed so. 

“Thank you my Lady, is is extremely hospitable of you to accommodate for the mortal.”

Yrsa and Loki smiled at each other and it made you feel a bit sick.

“Let me take you to your rooms.” 

You followed Yrsa, Loki and Thor at a small distance, all of them having irritated you. They were chatting between the three of them. Not that you were in much place to act moody, but being talked about like you didn’t exist had put a bad taste in your mouth. Asgardian views of people from Earth had been made very clear to you, and suddenly you were not surprised as much with Loki’s perceptions of humans beings being idiots who needed to be ruled.

Yrsa had taken you through one of the doors in the hexagonal room, and led you along twisting corridors with more tapestries. As you walked you noticed the tapestries seemed to be telling a story, you didn’t fully understand it, but you managed to spot Thor and Loki as well as some creepy looking guys that kind of looked like Voldemort. 

You came to stop outside a door and Yrsa looked down at you. 

“Here mortal. You may stay here during your time. You will find sleeping quarters and bathing facilities. I will arrange for someone to bring you new clothes.” 

“Thanks.”

You were grateful for the opportunity to take a bath and new clothes so you decided to put down your qualms for now and enter the door. 

You were greeted with a nice looking room, a four poster bed with red velvet curtains and en suite leading to a stone bathroom. It was clean, quiet and Loki free, all of the things you were looking for in a current place to sleep. 

You immediately entered the bathroom and stripped off, running yourself a hot bath. You nosied around in the cupboards until you found a little glass vial that looked like it could be some form of body wash or shampoo. You jumped in and sighed, giving yourself chance to luxuriate while you could. You seriously considered just staying in the bath for the next two days until you left this place and had to get traveling again. 

You panicked when you heard someone coming into your room, until a voice called out, 

“I am here to bring some clothes miss, I have left them on your bed. Prince Thor wished for me to tell you that there is to be a feast soon, and that someone will collect you in an hour.” 

You calmed down when you heard them leave. Now you thought about it, you were pretty hungry and it must be past lunchtime by now. You stayed in the bath as long as possible until the water had tuned cold and then went to inspect your new garments. As expected, you had been provided with a long floaty dress which seemed to be the pinnacle of Asgardian woman fashion. You were surprised to see that it wasn’t too long on you, before dreadfully realising that it was probably a childs dress. Still, it fit, it was comfy and it was not the same clothes you had been wearing for the past two and a half days. 

You felt fresher and better than you had done since you arrived on this godforsaken planet, the healing power of a hot bath having worked wonders. 

There was a knock on the door, and you went to answer it, feeling definitely ready to eat.  

Unfortunately, when you opened the door Loki stood scowling down at you. You were not overjoyed at seeing him either, 

“I have been charged with babysitting you again it seems.” He glared at you as if you were the one that had given him such a task.

Loki turned and took large strides down the corridor, and you figured he wanted you to follow him.  You had to jog slightly to keep up with his steps. 

“Hey, how come you didn’t tell Yrsa the truth about the bi-thingy?” You asked him, slightly breathlessly due to the jogging.

In a matter of seconds, Loki had grabbed your arm and pinned you up against the wall. You weren’t exactly sure what had annoyed him now to create such a dramatic reaction to a simple question but you weren’t overly found of being held against your will. 

 He had boxed you in against the wall and you couldn’t push out of his grip, and he stared down at you, anger dancing in his eyes. 

“Wha-“ 

“Quiet.” He hissed as he put his hand over your mouth. 

He looked around shiftily, as if he was making sure no one was around before he spoke in a hushed voice,

“Do not speak of things you do not understand.”

You pushed on his arm furiously until he moved it from your mouth.

“Well then explain to me!” You whispered harshly, 

He rolled his eyes, and you thought he was going to ignore you, but continued to speak in a hissed whisper, 

“Something is happening.”

“Great thanks for that, very helpful.” You pushed against him again to get him off.

He tutted at you and put his hand over your mouth again. 

“Norns you’re a mouthy wench. The bifrost is guarded by a keeper, Heimdall. He wields the power of the rainbow bridge, which works to allow Asgardians to travel from realms. Heimdall sees and hears all.” 

Loki paused for a second and looked around him again before continuing quietly, 

“Because of this, he can be relied on to be called upon to help any Asgardians who need help, but he didn’t respond when Thor called.”

He looked at you meaningfully, but you were struggling to follow. He was very close to you, and you could smell his aftershave, orangey and woody with a hint of mint. Loki’s voice was like what you assumed listening to chocolate would sound like, silky and smooth and now he whispered it took all your energy not to melt. He could definitely start an ASMR channel if he wanted to. His blue eyes were boring into your own very intensely and you didn’t know where to look. His eyes were so nice to look at, but they also made you feel a bit giddy.

Your faraway look must have shown on your face because Loki rolled his eyes again and then spoke very carefully. 

“Heimdall not responding to his duties is suspicious indeed. This combined with the issues with the convergence -“

He stopped speaking and his eyes widened. A maid turned down the corridor and started walking past you. She smiled and bowed to Loki before continuing. You were embarrassed to note that she didn’t seem overly bothered by him clearly holding a mortal hostage. When she was out of sight Loki lent in closer. 

“Do not speak of these things in front of lady Yrsa and her court. The last thing we need is more unsettlement. It would be wise to be cautious during your time here. These are strange times and it is not safe for a mortal to be in Asgard. You would do well to leave as soon as you get the chance, do you understand?” 

Was he actually warning you? You were confused; you were under the impression Loki couldn’t give two hoots about if you were safe or not given that he’d been the one causing you the most danger so far during your time here. You were surprised at this small display of decency, and remembered how he had given you a shirt to sleep in the night previous. Your hardened perspective of him wavered slightly. 

Loki seemed to be waiting for something, so you nodded as best you could with the little space you had with your head against the wall. He seemed satisfied and let you go, stepping back as he did so and drawing himself up to his full hight as if nothing had happened.  

“Come, we will be late.” 

He started strutting down the corridor again and you kept up as best as you could, considering his words. Things already seemed way more complicated than you wanted them to be, and you hoped you could get home soon and not have to be a part of this anymore. This was not your battle you just needed to get through these next few weeks. 

Loki stopped outside a large wooden patterned door. 

“Here mortal. The smaller hall, where we are gathering for lunch. There will be another, larger and rowdier feast tonight, i’d recommend not filling up too much. Don’t start eating until Lady Yrsa starts and start with the smallest cutlery first.” 

“Erm right.” You were still unsure why Loki had decided to be helpful but you were thankful. You must have looked slightly panicked as Loki said,

“Don’t fret, they won’t be expecting you to have table manners” 

“Well thanks I guess.”

He opened the door and you followed him through. The room you entered was large, with a huge wooden table running down the middle of it. Yrsa sat at the head of the table, an older lady was set next to her on her right, and on her left, a young woman that looked so much like Yrsa she could only be a relation. Thor was also seated at the top end of the table, where as Halvor you noticed, was towards the middle. It seemed to you that the seating arrangement was based on status. Sucks to be at the bottom of the table. Making up the rest of the numbers around the table where mainly the men you had been travelling and a few that you didn’t recognise.  

You weren’t sure where you were supposed to be sat and you assumed you’d be so far at the end of the table you’d be out the door, but Thor waved you over so you followed Loki towards the top. The table was covered in delicious looking food, fruit and cold meats and bread and your stomach rumbled. 

You slid into the seat that Thor offered for you, sitting diagonally across from Loki. Yrsa stood up and held her goblet up. 

“Welcome, Prince Thor and Prince Loki and to all who travel with them. We are indebted to have the royal party staying with us in Deill. I hope your time here will be comfortable. Now, raise your goblets.”

You picked up the cup in front of you and peered in. It had contained some light blue liquid which seemed to gently swirl and shimmer in the goblet. 

“Skål! She shouted. 

Everyone in the room chorused “Skål” and downed their drinks.

You took a sip of the strange liquid. It was nice actually, it tasted like sweet elderflower and you took another sip. You were so busy focused on your drink, that you jumped when people around the room shouted “another!” And proceeded to smash their goblets on the floor. Your eyes widened, did you have to do that? You hadn’t finished yet, what if you offended the Asgardians by not following their traditions?

Luckily, no one seemed to bring it up, and you noticed Yrsa starting to eat so you figured you could too. You focused on filling up your plate with different meat, cheeses and bread, taking what looked like things you would enjoy before Volstagg ate it all. You had barely filled your plate up when you noticed he was half way through his second plate. 

“Mortal, how are you finding your visit to Asgard?” Yrsa addressed you.

You were so shocked at being talked to that it took you a second to think of an answer. 

“Yeah, erm great.”

Very eloquent well done. 

‘Why do you travel with a mortal?” The girl you assumed was Yrsa’s sister asked. 

“She came to us through the convergence, Lady Ylva.  Latte wanted to come with us to explore Asgard for a little while.” Thor answered.

“How queer” Yrsa’s sister, Ylva, stated.

“What do you do Mortal?” Yrsa asked, taking a bite of bread.

The question threw you. You cleared your throat, 

“Well I work in social media e-marketing.” 

Everybody looked at you. 

“Is that a dangerous occupation?” 

You snorted, 

“Erm, no.” 

“But you are trained in combat? Or do you weald magic?"

Before you could answer, Loki spoke up,

“From my time on Midgard I have come to learn more about their ways and culture. I have learnt that mortals are rather dull creatures, with a very limited understanding of their universe. Their technology is behind and the vast majority possess no interesting or intelligent qualities.”

Harsh much? Just when you thought he was starting to act okayish. 

You focused on your food again, buttering your bread a bit more severely than normal and grinding your teeth. You had settled into a bitter reverence when the doors of the hall you were in swung open. A young servant boy ran in to the hall, as white as a ghost and panting. 

“Your ladyship, your highnesses” he took a few deep breaths.

“Out with it boy” Yrsa stood. 

Sigyn is a healer at heart. But if she needs too, she can be a powerful fighter.

- If her magic is tinted with orange, its in offense mode.

-If its tinted with dark green its in healer mode. Yellow is for basic spells.

-She is a nature mage. So she draws energy from nature, but also practices in giving it back. Which is why she cares so much about nature.

-There's this cool thing that when she’s healing someone, the skin will grow like a plant. The magic will be a sapling from the skin to signify that there is a injury there, but it goes away after 24 hours.

-offense, the magic forms into razor sharp leaves. 

-Defense, she makes shields and can stick her opponent in place.

-Can heal only physical wounds.

-Good at doing luck blessings.

The broach she’s wearing is a latch ditch attempt at surviving. Loki’s greatest powers reside in the broach. She should only use it if she’s on the brink of dying/near death.

So basically, this is what @lokislittlesigyn ‘s character would have in my AU. 

You were fading in and out, you could hear the screams of men and women, you could feel their fear, for you radiated it as well.

Dark spots spotted your vision, and you were falling back into darkness.

Like ink in water, your memories resurfaced.

“-and this is my daughter.” Your mother smiled at the Queen, pushing you gently by the small of your back.

You blushed, curtsying, standing as tall as you could to look like the lady your mother was, but you only reached her hip. “My Queen.”

Frigga smiled lovely, “Why, she looks just like you.”

The sound of a shattering vase made the three of you turn to the door of the room.

“Loki- by the Norns these boys. Come here this instant!” Frigga scolded, “That was a vase that your father brought back from Vanaheim when we first met!”

A boy poked his head into the room from behind the door, his lips were set into a tight line, preventing not to laugh. “I’m truly sorry mother.”

The Queen sighed, beckoning the boy forward. “Loki, come meet our guests.”

He stood in front of you, and you both stared at one another. You blushed under his gaze, and averted your eyes downward.

He was just a few inches taller than you, his hair black as night, and his skin reminded you of porcelain. His eyes reminded you of what emeralds must have looked like after being submerged in water.

“Darling perhaps you could show her around the library?”

When the dark spots subsided, you blinked rapidly, pushing off on your hands. The cut on your temple was bleeding, and the blood was running down on your eyes, blocking your vision. Around you were the bodies of the men and women you heard screaming, the remnants of fear in the dead eyes.

Your stomach turned, your eyes had watered. You had survived the fall of Asgard, and yet this had been the demise of your people. You leaned on the wall, forcing one foot in front of another, not particularly sure where you were going.

The ballroom was lit with candles and flowers, welcoming the spring solstice. Your mother had made you a sea green dress, with white budding and blooming flowers cascading on the bottom. Your cheeks were rosy with glee, as you watched the couples dance to their heart’s content, watching as the fabric of the noble ladies’s dresses swished to and fro.

“It’s much more fun to partake in the activity rather than watch it all evening.”

You jumped, nearly spilling your beverage. You held a hand to your chest, attempting to steady the rapid beat of your heart when you met eyes with green ones. A laugh tumbled from you, and blushed deeply at him. “Loki you nearly sent my soul to Valhalla.”

He was so close, and so handsome. His dark hair touched the nape of his neck, and a few strands fell in front of his eyes. He was wearing his formal armor, knowing he must be wanting nothing more than to take it off. Your heart thumped merrily at the sight of him, and his smile mimicked yours. He took your drink, set it on the table closest to you. He took your hands, his skin so pale against yours, the feel of him electrifying each of your nerves.

“May I have this dance?”

You nodded, feeling the eyes of nearly everyone watching the both of you. “Of course.”

You felt like the princesses in your fairy-tales that night.

Your dress was in tatters, the bottom burnt, and your slippers soiled with blood.

Squinting, you followed the sound of voices, trying not to take such deep breaths, for you knew the air would be poisonous. You slowed your steps, and peeked around the corner, the very image nearly swallowing you up whole.

Thor was kneeling, encased in metal, muzzled like a dog. Thanos battled the Hulk, each punch they threw at each other causing you to flinch.

You felt like throwing up, the fear you had felt earlier now clutching you in it’s jaws, forcing your heart racing in panic as you assessed the situation.

And you did something completely idiotic: you stepped from your corner and hobbled forward, your nerves buzzing and the hair rising on your shoulders when sets of eyes turned to you.

You felt arms snake around you and pull you against a wall. One arm let you go and moved to cover your mouth when you squealed.

“What are you doing here?” Loki growled into your ear, “You were supposed to have gone with Valkyrie!” His eyes were widened, and he looked around in a frenzy, “if he sees you, he’ll kill you! Why aren’t you with Valkyrie!”

When he uncovered your mouth, you wrapped yourself around him, holding him to you like it was your only hope.

And maybe it was.

“Darling, she’s dead,” you croaked, leaning into him, into his embrace, “My love, I’m sorry-”

He was angry, his green eyes cracking like lighting. “I told you to leave!” Now he appeared to have tears in his eyes, “You were supposed to have left by now!”

The fire in the room was overbearing, the heat made your silk gown stick to your skin, sweat, blood and dirt mingled on your body, reminding you of the matter at hand. You cupped his cheeks in your hands, “My love, they killed everyone. I’m sorry.”

“Then you should have gone alone!” He spat at you, pushing you away to look at you.

You shook your head, looking deeply into his green eyes. “You’re a fool to think I would leave you behind.” You told him solemnly. “I’ve lost you more times than I can count on one hand. I won’t have it have it happen again.”

Lying on his chest, you felt him lazily trace patterns on your back. “One day, perhaps, there might even be little you’s and me’s.”

You smiled, burrowing your face into his bare chest. “You would want that?” You asked hopefully, the thought of such a things making happiness blossom in your chest.

He didn’t say anything after that, but you could hear his smile of confirmation. But this idea of children made you giggle, so you peeked up at him through your lashes.

He was beautiful. He reminded you of the statues that were carved from marble, decorated with gold and silver that screamed of regality.

“You’re beautiful,” you murmured, a lock of your hair falling onto your shoulder. You scooted up, peppering kisses up his neck and to his lips, hovering as he looked contently in your eyes. “You’re beautiful,” you repeated, pressing kisses on his lips.

“Hardly,” he replied when you paused your motives, “Nothing rivals you.” He grasped your shoulders, flipping the two of you so that he was above you now, and you let him have you wholly.

Loki had torn his eyes away from you, and you noticed the way his face darkened. He made a move to stride forward, but you grabbed at his arm. “Don’t you dare.” You demanded shakily, the tears you were keeping at bay falling freely, “Don’t you dare think about doing it.”

Then the Titan spoke, his words reverberating through your body, each words sending waves of goose flesh on your skin, as he commanded beings you could not see from your vantage point. “There are two more stones on Earth. Bring them to me, my children.”

Shivers ran down your spine, and Loki came to you once more. His face was stoic, and he leaned forward to press a kiss to the crown of your head. “I’ve never meant to hurt you,” he whispered in your ear. “We will see each other again.”

“You’re alive.” You spoke soberly, pushing back your hood. “Why didn’t you…” you paused, your chest was puffing as you looked at him with hurt, “Why didn’t you at least send word that you were alive? If you did not want me, that’s one thing. I would be able to live with that.” Your voice was calm, “But you blatantly lying about your death,” you hissed, “is something far different, Loki.”

Your hands were shaking, and you bore your eyes into him, as he did you. He sat silently, watching you intently.

“Well?” You shrieked, “Aren’t you going to say something? An explanation for this madness? Loki you have killed-”

“Don’t you think I know what I’ve done?” He finally snapped, standing to glower down at you, the only thing separating the two of you was the invisible parameter, “I don’t need to explain myself to you.”

You clenched your jaw as you continued your stare-off. “I mourned for you. Everyday. There hasn’t been a single day that went by that I did not think of you.” Holding your tears at bay, you dropped the angry facade, tilting your head up, allowing all the emotions you’ve been bottling inside to escape. “I am so incredibly hurt,” you spoke slowly, hoping that by doing so he would understand, “by you.”

He had moved too quickly for you, walking from where you both were hidden and into the limelight of attention. Your mind wasn’t thinking correctly, for you were still processing what he had told you.

Loki perked up, moving your hands to the side as he walked to stand in front of Thanos. “If you’re going to Earth, then you will need a guide. I am, after all, familiar in that department,” he smiled charmingly, opening his hands upward to invoke a sense of trust, “I do have experience.”

“You call failure experience?” You heard Thanos counter.

“I call experience experience.”

Perhaps impulsiveness was in the air, perhaps you had breathed in too many fumes, because you moved forward, stepping over dead bodies and scraps of rubble.

Thor was encased in metal, his yells and protests muffled, the image reminding you of a dog being tied up.

Three figures watched you, and the tall thin one you had yet to notice held a hand up at his siblings.

“A survivor,” the woman said in a mocking tone.

Loki whipped around to lock eyes with you, and you begged him with yours, your throat tight.

You chin quivered as you looked up at your only source of comfort. His green eyes didn’t allow any emotion to show, but deep down you knew that he must have been fighting the urge to come to you because you saw his arm twitch.

But it didn’t go unnoticed.

“He cares for her,” the thin man spoke in a snively manner, “and she him.”

You closed your eyes and hung your head. Of course Loki would not have wanted to reach out to you. It would give both you and him away.

“Please,” you whimpered once more, tiredness seeping into your bones and you forced yourself to make eye contact with Thanos, “Please just leave them alone.”

“Do not fret, little one. For you will be a child of Thanos.”

“Almighty Thanos!” Loki turned right back around, breathing deeply, took a peek at Thor and then kneeled. “I, Loki, Prince of Asgard…”

It felt wrong. This whole situation, and you could feel the hairs on the back of your neck stand, watching as he took a deep breath, and your first instinct was to go to him. But you were being held back. You squirmed in the hold, your eyes wide as you watched Loki say something, but it fell deaf on yours, your heart hammered, the blood in your veins running cold as you watched your impulsive lover.

Dread filled your being as the events unfolded in front of you, slowly, heart wrenching, and painful.

You watched him being lifted in the air, watched how he struggled to breathe. Your mind was faltering, and it felt like you were being winded.

Screams tore at your throat as you thrashed to try to move forward, to do anything to make the Titan stop.

“Loki!” You were so young, no more than the age of ten-

The memory surged forward, gripping you tightly, almost mockingly, for making you think that perhaps this was but an illusion, that the small part of your brain secretly hoped that this was only a nightmare.

“Loki!” You called from the gardens, watching as the boy lept into the branches of the tree, “Please be careful!” You were covering your face with your hands, your eyes peeking out from your fingers and flinching each time as he wavered and nearly lost balance. “Oh! Please come back down! I could go get an apple from the kitchens!”

The prince laughed, his eyes glimmering with mischief, “You doubt my stealth.”

You flinched once more, watching as he hung on the thick arm of the apple tree. “No, never that my prince. I’m more worried that you’ll fall and break your neck. Loki, please-”

“Got it!” You heard him say, the green leaves blocking him from your sight.

“Then please come back down!” You practically begged, trying to see if you could meet the boys eyes to persuade him to do so.

You heard a few grunts, and then a terrified squeal left you when you heard the branch snap. He had fallen, and you painfully watched as his pale body cut through the air and to the floor, nearly right at your feet.

“My prince!” You exclaimed in horror when his body hit the ground with a thud.

He groaned, his face puckered with pain and his nose wrinkled in annoyance. However, when he opened his green eyes, the mischief was back once again. He gave you a boyish smile, and held out the bright red apple you had pointed out to him moments before. “Told you I would get it for you.”

“Please!” You exclaimed, clawing at the arms that held you, “Please stop it!”

Loki struggled in Thanos’s grasp, his face turning purple, he turned to peek at you, the veins popping out on his forehead due to the lack of oxygen, “Thanos please! I will do anything- let him go! I beg of you!”

Your own voice was echoing in your mind, “No, never that my prince. I’m more worried that you’ll fall and break your neck. Loki, please-”

You were hysterical, your entire body shaking as you watched Loki utter something.

And then-

Snap

Loki’s struggles ceased. His whole body fell limp.

A blood curdling scream tore from you and Thanos threw him aside like a rag doll.

You felt nauseous, the mind numbing sensation you felt made you focus solely on his blue face; and his eyes, by the Norns, were staring at you, lifeless and glassy, staring past you.

You hardly felt the metal press through you, you hardly felt the gaping wound, the only thing you felt was the hole in your chest, the feeling of suffocation pressing down on you. It was then you decided that this was the worst pain that you’ve ever felt.

A pulse hit the ship, and Thor was released, Thanos and the others left, leaving the energy from the power stone to eat at the ship.

When had they finally released you? It didn’t matter. You clawed your way to the princes, your mouth agape, oblivious to the decaying vessel.

“No,” you moaned, taking Loki’s face into your hands, “Thor,” you cried, “bring him back. Bring him back to me-” You were withering away. This you could feel. Your dizziness caused you to fall on top of him, leaving behind streaks of blood on his armor. “Thor,” you shakily called out, “Thor promise me,” you murmured into Loki’s neck, “Promise me that you’ll kill him.”

You held on his armor, gripping at it to keep him close to you, you kissed his jaw as you’ve done so centuries past. The tears that fell from your eyes fell unto his discolored skin, and soon enough the foundation beneath you deteriorated away.

You sighed, leaning against the man beside you, “I’ve always wanted to see the beaches,” you murmured, playing with his long fingers, feeling the warm sun shine on your skin, “and I’ve always wanted a little cottage somewhere quiet.”

“I will give you that and more.”

You smiled at him, letting out a breathy laugh, “I want nothing from you other than you.”

There was a twinkle in his eye, and he was content with your reply, “And I you.”

You leaned in to kiss him, tenderly, relishing in the way his soft lips pressed against yours. “I love you,” your voice rung in the meadow, almost like bells.

He smiled, leaned his forehead against yours, and repeated his words, more passionately this time, “And I you.”

Your vision became cloudy, and you shut your eyes, feeling the warm leather under your fingers- a reminder that he was by you.

Such an ineffable way it was to describe the pain in your heart.

Part 2

That was until today.

He and his mother kept a regular teatime once a week since he was a teenager. Although they ceased following his stint on Midgard, the duo had recently resumed the activity. Every Friday evening after Loki had completed his teaching for the day, he would saunter to his mother’s parlour for treats and conversation. You were almost always brought up. If not by him, Frigga was sure to ask about you, which was why he had missed their last three meetings.

Lessons, he would say. Meetings and training with Thor, extra tasks for his father that he would be vague and abrupt about in describing, when the truth was, he did not know how to broach the topic of the two of you. You, whom he had been secretly dating for what he deemed the best three weeks of his life. You, whom he had left curled up under the covers of his bed with a book and the promise of a late-night horse ride.

“Loki?” He looked up at his mother. “Your tea.” She handed him the cup, which he took with thanks. “You’ve missed our last few teatimes. I was sure you would cancel this one too.”

Loki gave his best rueful smile. “My apologies, mother. I had some business to attend to. Henceforth, all our Friday evening teatimes shall be kept.”

“Good.” Frigga took a sip of her tea. When she placed it down, she asked, “How is Y/N? I haven’t seen her for a few weeks now.” Loki bit back a wince. He had kindly requested that you steer clear of his mother until he had the chance to talk to her. You were confused, since you and the queen were fond of each other, but obliged.

“Y/N is well. Her training is advancing. Soon, she may no longer require my tutelage.” Frigga smiled.

“I heard you showed up at that ball a few weeks ago.”

“I did,” Loki confirmed.

Frigga poured herself some more tea. “You also made sporadic appearances at a number of them these past few weeks.”

Loki shrugged, trying to retain his nonchalance. “Decided it was high time I rejoined society.”

“And Y/N was seen with you at all of them. Some say you even danced with her.” Loki took a large sip of his tea. His mother dropped two cubes of sugar into hers. She stirred it with a careful hand, cerulean eyes holding his jade orbs. Loki placed his cup down.

“You know.”

“Know what?” Mischief sparkled in Frigga’s eyes.

“About myself and Y/N. You know, don’t you?”

Frigga placed her cup down next to his. Her smaller hand sought out his larger one. “I suspected,” she clarified. “I’ve always known Y/N harbored a crush on you, and I’ve long noticed that you are… softer with her. It was not until the palace started buzzing about you two did I think that things might have progressed.”

“They have progressed. Y/N has agreed to let me court her, and I have been for three weeks now.” He paused to assess his mother’s reaction. “Are you cross with me? My intent was not to hide this from you. I just could not decide how to tell you. The last thing I wanted was for you to think I was taking advantage of her, for I know how much you care about her.”

“Loki, I know you would not take advantage of her,” his mother said, then, as an afterthought, “but you are being cautious, correct?”

“Mother!” Loki blushed crimson.

Frigga held up a hand. “I know you are old enough and well versed in such matters. However, Y/N is not. I promised her mother I would look after her, and although you two have started a relationship, I will continue to do so.”

Loki looked down. Just that morning he had taken you up against the shelves of his study. In his defense, he had not intended to at all. You had both agreed not to let your relationship get in the way of your lesson times, but when he had helped you with a tricky spell and you kissed him by way of thanks, he could not help it. Loki had not had sex with you in days, and before either of you knew it he had your skirts up, pants around his ankles, and was thrusting into you while you moaned his name.

“I have not done anything she does not want me to do,” he promised, remembering how you had pleaded with him for more. Loki always gave you what you asked for.

The queen lifted a delicate brow. “So you respect her? Take care of her?”

“Yes, mother.”

“And you have explained to her the complexities that come with courting a prince? With courting you?” Elaboration was not necessary.

“Y/N is very gracious about my past. She does not judge me like the others. It is…”. Loki leaned forward. His palms became sweaty all of a sudden, and he wiped them on his pants. “It is different with her. I have had many lovers, though none quite like this. The way she makes me feel is like nothing I have ever felt before.”

Frigga, unbeknownst to him, had been hiding a knowing smile behind her cup. “Sounds like love.” He did not correct her, though his cheeks coloured. “If you are serious about her, then I support you. I have always liked Y/N, and should her mother have questions I will handle it. Although, if she comes to you first, I cannot stop her.”

Loki winced. He had met your mother on a number of occasions, and the woman was quite fiery. “Of course.” His mother pat his hand, and they returned to their tea in silence.

“Oh,” Frigga stopped mid-sip, as though she had just remembered something. “And do not let me hear a whisperabout you getting that girl pregnant. I shall ring your ear if I do.”

Loki choked on his tea.

ooOOoo

“I told my mother about us today.”

You looked up at Loki from where your head lay on his shoulder. It was nighttime, and you were both at a performance put on by a traveling troupe that came to the palace every year. They were one of your favourites, the group, and you always attended their plays with your friends. Usually you would sit down below with the rest of your friends, but dating a prince came with many perks. One of them was that you got a private viewing box all to yourselves high above the rest of the crowd.

“Is she upset with me?” Worry creased your brow as you turned to face him on the sofa. You loved the queen and hoped your relationship with her unproclaimed favourite son would not be an issue.

Loki took your hand and pressed a kiss to it. “Quite the opposite. She was actually more concerned about if I was treating you well.”

“You always treat me well.” You kissed his lips softly, and he did not attempt to deepen the kiss.

“She also warned me against getting you pregnant,” Loki murmured against your mouth. You let out a snort.

“The queen can rest assured that we are very astute in the prevention area.” You laid your head on his chest again and reflected on your time with the prince. Allowing him to court you had not been half as difficult as you had expected. Loki was a master of trickery, which made it easy to hide your new relationship. It was not that you were against telling people, rather that you wanted his mother’s blessing before you announced it.

Eir had already noticed something had changed between you and the prince. The more time you spent with him meant less time with her, and though you could tell she wanted to ask, she had not. You were grateful that she did not ask. Things between you and Loki were new and exciting and you cherished the extra time you spent as you got to know him in a different light.

The past few weeks felt like a dream. You had known Loki was different with you but agreeing to court him had opened a new door entirely. He was no longer your teacher, but your partner, and it was evident in everything he did. Monogamy was a concept you never expected the prince to adhere to, and every day he did took more of the weight off your shoulders. Loki was yours, and yours alone, and you were his.

Even your sex life was out of this realm. Loki had already been good, but now he knew every inch of your body. He knew what you liked and how you liked it, your tell before you came and when you were aroused, and he utilized that information to the best of his ability. You noticed that he had been extra careful not to play any games or tease you when you two were being intimate. After your fallout from the dance, he seemed as though he was scared to push you too far, and you could not help but wonder if he was being properly satisfied.

“Loki?”

“Yes, petal?”

You hid you face in his chest. When you spoke, your voice was muffled. “Are you happy with our sex life?”

“Yes,” he answered, a hint of curiosity in his voice.

“Are you sure?” you squeaked. “Because you can tell me if not. I won’t be angry, I promise.”

Loki lifted your chin. His forehead was creased in concern. “Where is this coming from? Has someone said something to you?”

“No,” you blushed deep. “I mean, I know you finish, but I can’t help wondering if you’ve curbed your appetite for me.”

A dark brow lifted. “Meaning?”

“Meaning you like games.” Understanding dawned on him.

“There’s very little I haven’t done in bed, that’s correct,” he admitted. “I am a flexible creature by nature. It’s easy for me to adapt to what my lovers want, and I have developed a wide taste due to that.” He took your hand in his. “That does not mean I need to do those things. I am quite content deferring to your lead.”

“Okay,” you murmured. Your head hit his chest again. His hand was on your back, rubbing soothing circles into the skin. “Although… if you wanted to try something different, I would not be opposed.”

You felt Loki perk up. “Really?”

“Yeah…”. Your face was heated, and you knew your cheeks were crimson. “If it’s nothing too out there, I’d be willing to try.”

“Petal, look at me. Please.” Your eyes met his. A collective, raucous laugh rang out from the crowd below. “I would love to try something different with you, but first I need to know your limits. Tell me the things that are off the table. Things that you do not want to try under any circumstance.”

You thought for a bit. Sex was new territory for you, though you did have some friends who were quite experienced. They had told you of their many escapades and from that, you could pick a few things that did not interest you. “Spanking,” you murmured. “I don’t think I’d like that. Being tied up is another. Choking. Anything that would cause me pain, basically.”

Loki looked at you intently. He was taking what you said with an air of seriousness you did not expect. “Noted. I think I have something in mind you’d like.” His hands moved to your hips. “If I put up an illusion, would you like to try it here?”

You swallowed thickly, eyes drifting to the people around you. “No one would see us?”

“No one. I promise.” He placed his forehead against yours. There was not one hint of a joke in his green eyes. “I’m not going to hurt you, and I’m not going to give you a safe word. That is not what’s happening here. If you want me to stop, just tell me and I will. Understood?”

“Yes. I trust you.” He grinned, then kissed your forehead.

“Good girl. Stand up for me?” You did, and saw the telltale green line of seidr rise up around you. “Remove your underwear.” Your hands reached under you to tug on the material. Using a shifting motion, you shimmied them down until they were on the floor. Loki reached for you and pulled you closer. His seat was low, so his face sat level with your pelvis. He took one of your legs and placed it over his shoulder.

“Loki!” You gasped when his mouth made contact with your core. A hand went to his head, fingers tangling in his hair. Your mouth fell open when you felt his hot tongue slide through your folds.

“So wet,” he murmured. “Always so wet for me. Like a fucking waterfall.” He leaned back then, letting your leg fall to the side. His hands went to his pants. In no time at all, he had his cock free and standing upright in front of you. “Turn around and lift your skirts.”

You bit your lip, turning to face the rest of the auditorium. No one could see you lift your skirts thanks to Loki’s spell. His hands were on your waist then, moving you towards his lap. You felt the head of his cock brush your folds and let out a surprised gasp.

“Shhh, it’s okay.” You looked down. He had one hand on his shaft, holding it to your entrance, and the other was at your hip. “You’re going to take a seat on my cock, okay?”

“Okay,” you mumbled. He guided you onto him with care. You had never been on top before. The head of him felt bigger at this angle, and you whimpered as your walls stretched to accommodate all of him. He was so deep in this position. You would not be surprised if he reached all the way to your cervix.

“Petal?” His lips were at your shoulder, placing kisses on the skin. “How do you feel?”

“Full,” you whimpered, and he chuckled. “You’re so big!”

“Thank you.” He kissed the back of your head. You rocked your head against his shoulder and waited for him to start moving. After a few seconds, you noticed he was sitting still.

“Loki…” you whined.

“Yes, petal?”

You shifted your hips, walls clenching around his cock. “Move, please.”

“Not yet, okay?” You whipped your head around to look at him, eyes wide in disbelief. “Let’s just watch the play first.” Your mouth turned down. Loki took hold of your chin and returned your head to the stage below. “I’ll take care of you after, I promise. Try to relax.”

You tried to relax— you really did. Your pussy was clenching on his cock and there was a need burning within you, and yet still you attempted to pay attention to the play below. You had no idea what act they were even on. All your mind could focus on was Loki’s cock inside of you and how hard it was to keep from moving. The difficulty of this task ramped up when his nimble fingers untied the knot behind your neck and the top of your dress fell to your waist.

Loki’s hands went to your bare breasts, cupping and kneading the flesh in a way that made you squirm. He rolled your nipples between his fingers, making them impossibly hard. Your eyes closed with a moan. Within you or on you, Loki’s talented fingers knew no bounds. He kept up his motions until you were grinding your hips down on his cock.

“I told you to relax, petal,” he admonished. One of his arms wrapped around you to keep you still. The other went to your mouth, presenting two fingers to you. “Get these nice and wet for me, won’t you?” You parted your lips to allow them entrance. Once Loki was sure you had adequately wet them, he removed them. “Good girl.”

A cry left your lips when his fingers touched your throbbing clit. You tried to close your legs, but Loki was quicker. He grabbed your legs and threw them over either of his, then parted his own legs wide. Now you were spread out for him. With your dress bunched around your waist, breasts free and wet cunt on display, you were extra glad for his illusion. You just knew you looked like a whore moaning and writhing on his lap.

“Just a little longer, petal,” Loki whispered in your ear. He kissed the side of your face, cock twitching within you. “You’re doing so well for me.” You could hear the strain in his voice. His hand stayed around your waist, fingers toying with your clit at regular intervals. You jumped as a wave of pleasure rolled through you. He shushed you. “Try not to cum, okay? The play is almost over.”

There was no real danger of you finishing early. As well as Loki knew how to bring you to a gasping end, he knew how to keep you on edge. His fingers were not circling your clit at the correct intensity. They moved at a leisurely pace, keeping that tightness in your core but not allowing you to reach your end. Here, he could keep you teetering for as long as he desired.

Your fingers dug into his thighs. Your toes curled, nails scraping against the sofa. Loki pressed your clit and your back arched off him with a yell. Tears sprang to your eyes. You could not hold on anymore. You needed to cum, and you needed to cum now.

“Loki!” His name came out as a sob. “I can’t.” That seemed to flip a switch in him. You were off his cock in seconds and seated on the bannister. His hands were smoothing back your hair, lips pressing against your sweaty cheeks.

“It’s okay, sweet thing,” he was saying. “It’s okay. I’ll take care of you now. You did so well for me. Hold on to the railing.” Your hands gripped the golden bar behind you. He slid into you without delay and your head fell back. You could see the rest of the crowd behind you, up in the boxes around. All their attention was focused on the play.

You moaned when Loki began to thrust into you. His pace was faster than usual. He gripped your hips with a bruising force and rolled into you. You knew the little game had affected him too. It did not matter how experienced he was. You had heard the strain in his voice and felt his shaft jumping inside you the entire time you were on him.

Loki grabbed one of your legs, throwing it over his shoulder. His other hand grasped the back of your head. He tugged on your hair, exposing your neck to an onslaught of kisses and nibbles. His hands moved to the railing behind you. A particularly hard thrust had your back hitting the railing. Shocked, you let go of it. Your upper body fell backward, and you screamed. “Loki!”

He grabbed you with one strong arm. His thrusting stopped, wide eyes running over your face. “Petal? Are you okay?”

You turned your head to look down at the crowd below. They were all still focused on the play. Not a single one of them had noticed your near fall. “Yeah.” Your heart raced in your chest. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

“Put your arms around my neck.” You obeyed. He lifted you off the bannister and sat back on the sofa, positioning your legs on either side of him. Gripping your hips, he began moving you in a rolling motion. “That should be better.”

“Hmhm.” You nodded. He felt different in you like this. It was slower, more intimate. You could feel every ridge of his cock massaging your walls with each thrust. He dipped his head to take your left nipple in his mouth and you moaned. Both your hands tangled in his hair, trapping his head in place against you.

“Touch yourself,” he ordered. His lips found the valley between your breasts and gave it a kiss. “Use two fingers and play with clit for me.”

Touching yourself was not something you had done before. There were times when you had wanted to, but you were too shy to go through with it. Loki had tried to get you to do it for him once and you could not. You let two of your fingers travel down to your nub. Slowly, you started circling the bundle of nerves in a clockwise motion like you had seen him do. “Like this?”

“Yes, just like that.” Loki was just as breathless as you. His eyes zeroed in on your fingers below and darkened. “Fuck, you look so good.” He brought your head down so he could whisper in your ear. “How does that feel?”

“Good,” you whimpered. He ground his hips up into you, hitting a spot inside that you knew would make you come undone. “It feels good.” Loki grinned.

“You like playing with yourself?” You nodded. “Will you do it again for me sometime? Let me watch you play with yourself?” Red coloured your cheeks. “If I lay you back against my desk in the study, will you fuck your sweet cunt with your fingers until you cum all over yourself? Tell me, sweet thing.”

“Y-yes,” you whispered. “Anything you want.”

You felt Loki’s hand replace yours. He pressed his thumb against your nub and began that pace that always got you over the edge. “Good girl. Cum for me, now. Cum hard.” That was all the encouragement you needed. A few more circles had your walls clenching around him, fingers digging into his shoulders. Loki came not long after. He yelled out when his orgasm hit, grinding into you as you lay whimpering on his shoulder. Your entire body felt sweaty and spent. You let him ride out his high until his hips came to a stop.

“Petal?” You made an incoherent noise. Loki rubbed a hand up and down your back. “Are you okay?” You nodded. “Want me to take you to bed?” Another nod. “Okay.” You felt him fix your dress back in place.

“I can’t walk,” you whimpered. “My legs are shaking.”

Loki lifted you without a word. You heard the swoosh of a portal open, and then he stepped into his bedroom.

ooOOoo

Instead of taking you straight to bed, Loki took you into his bathroom first. As tired as you were, he knew you would feel better after a bath. You whined when he tried to put you in. He had long noticed that you were clingy after he had sex with you, and he loved it. You clung to his neck and would not let go, so he just got into the tub with you.

Fifteen minutes later, he was sliding you under the covers and tucking you in. You whimpered when his hands left you. “Stay.”

“I’m staying, my sweet.” He got in beside you and you curled up against him at once. His lips sought out your forehead, giving it a kiss. “I have to get up early in the morning for a meeting, but feel free to sleep in. No one will bother you here.”

You turned sleepy eyes on him. “Will you be gone long?”

“Expect me back before noon. We can have lunch together if you want.”

“Yes, please.” Your head nuzzled into his neck. You were silent for a long time, so he thought you had fallen asleep. Loki was just beginning to doze off when he heard your voice again. “Loki?”

“Yes, sweet thing?”

It was soft, what you said next. Had Loki’s hearing not been on a godly level, he might not have heard it, and though you succumbed to sleep right after, the mumbled words fell from your lips like a prayer. “I love you.”

You had never said that to him before. Alluded, sure, but never had the three words left your lips. Smiling to himself, Loki pressed a kiss to your cheek. “I love you too.”

END

“Brother!” Loki cursed, bringing the book closer to his chest. Thor had previously come of age to openly partake in the wonders of alcohol and missed no chance to get his hands on a spirit. The unbridled loudness of his voice let Loki know that that was exactly what he had been doing that night.

“Loki?” Heavy footsteps sounded through the room as Thor began walking up and down the aisles. For just a moment, he considered casting an illusion to hide himself from his brother. A sober Thor was a lot to handle, a tipsy even more so, and a drunk Thor was just downright annoying. But Loki knew Thor would not stop looking for him, and a little inebriation did not diminish his love for his brother, so he revealed his presence with a few simple words.

“I’m here,” he said. Thor’s face appeared around a bookshelf that held volumes on astrology. Puberty had turned his jawline square, peppering it with the beginnings of a golden beard. Gone was his childhood chubbiness. In its place sat well-defined muscles, and the women of the court took a particular interest in that aspect. It was as though Thor had snapped his fingers and suddenly, he had a bevy of ladies following him wherever he went. Loki, with his face still smooth and limbs lanky, just watched from afar.

“You’re drunk, brother,” said Loki. “Mother would not be pleased.”

Thor grinned wide, showing his row of pearly teeth. “But mother is not here! She left a while ago in such a rush. Barely even noticed me lurking about.”

While Thor had been speaking, Loki had moved to place the book back on the shelf. He lifted a brow, now finished with his task, and turned to face his brother. “Where did she go?”

“I do not know.” Thor shrugged. “But come! You must join us!”

Loki hesitated. It had been a while since Thor had requested his company, much less sought him out to do so. Their social paths had diverged a long time ago, with him preferring academia and seidr whereas Thor was all about the figuring and weaponry. They still saw each other on the daily , and attended events together as the princess were wont to do, however there was no denying that their relationship was no longer the same.

He must have been lost in his head for too long, Loki realized, since Thor’s face began to drop at his lack of an answer. “D-do you not want to spend time with me? I know I have been entertaining the attentions of others as of late, but I truly did not mean to upset you.”

“Thor’s, it’s –”

“I see how taken you are with your studies, and I know you do not like to be disturbed so I stay out of your way until I see you. Except I do not see you, and if I do, it’s always with a book in hand.” Now Loki just felt terrible. If Thor was guilty of spending more time with others, he was also at fault for getting lost in his old world. He could not count the number of times his mother had to send a page to the library to call him to dinner, or to remind him to get ready for an upcoming event.

“Alright,” he relented, “I’ll come, but for only a little while.”

Thor beamed. “Excellent!” A large hand descended on his own, circling his entire wrist, then the older boy was pulling him down the hall and out into the night. Two people were already seated around the large, golden brazier when they arrived. Thor called out to them in excitement. “My friends! I have returned!”

“And I,” said Fandral, with a sly wink in Loki’s direction, “have ale. My father won’t even know it’s gone.” Thor released his hand to take a swig from the glass bottle. He turned and offered it to Loki, who declined. His inclination towards cleanliness prevented him from sharing utensils with anyone. Loki would not even sip from the same teacup as his mother and she was the most hygienic person he knew.

“I’m surprised Thor was able to pull you away from your hiding place. Aren’t you usually buried beneath a pile of books at this hour?” Loki turned his head to where the young Lady Sif sat. She was cloaked in a thick blanket to buffer the wind, dark eyes regarding him without any amusement.

They were somewhat friends, he guessed. The girl was quite taken with his brother and had no real reason to dislike him. Trust, however, was another thing entirely. And Sif did not trust Loki. “And should you not be asleep in your own bed? Your mother would have a fit if she caught word of you stealing away in the night with three young men.”

Sif did not answer. Instead, her attention had drifted to Thor. An uncharacteristic softness made its way into her eyes as she watched the older boy begin a mock fight with Fandral. They were both intoxicated by now but managed to maintain enough sobriety so as not to hurt the other. Loki watched as Fandral struck his foot out at Thor, catching the tip of Thor’s flask with his toes. With a loud gasp, Thor held the silver vessel to his chest and began stroking it.

Maybe it was the way Sif giggled aloud, the obvious care for his brother evident in the swell of her cheeks. It could also have been the fact that Thor had tracked him down, forced him to come out and then all but sat him down to watch him have fun. Whatever it was, it made Loki a bit frustrated, and when he was frustrated, mischief was sure to follow. “Are you ever going to make a move or are we all destined to watch your pining whenever he’s around?”

Sif paused mid laugh and turned to look at Loki. She flipped that long golden hair that she was so proud of over her shoulder—an attempt at nonchalance—and fixed him with a glare. “I know not what you speak of.”

“I speak of your open affections for my brother,” Loki replied. “Pray tell that you will disclose this information to him soon. It’s pathetic watching this going on.”

“Pathetic?” Sif raised her eyebrows. Loki resisted the urge to grin. It was so easy to get her riled up. “What’s pathetic is you and your ill attempt at hiding your ownfeelings. If you’re going to make fun of me, at least make sure the topic isn’t one that makes you a hypocrite.”

For just a moment, Loki froze. Was it possible that the golden-haired beauty had figured out his long-resolved, childhood crush on her? It was a fleeting thing, his feelings for her, brought on by her being his brother’s first female friend. Sif was always kind to him when they were children and he soon found himself developing a more than platonic liking to the older girl. Of course, that had soon passed when he discerned her true taste in the opposite sex. “W-what?”

“Fjor.” Loki’s eyes widened. “Lord Oddvar’s son? I saw how flustered you got when he offered to train with you last week. Never have I seen you trip over your words so.” Sif paused to give him a smug smile. “Looks like the only thing you’ll be known for tongue wise is lying.”

“And you,” Loki grit out, hands curled into fists, “will be known as the lady who almost married the elder prince of Asgard. But if you’re a good girl I’m sure brother dearest may keep you around as his whore—”

Sif pounced; outstretched arms aimed at his throat. She knocked him over with ease and began grabbing for his neck. Loki brought his arms up in a feeble attempt to fend her off. “You worm! Why must you be so awful!”

“Sif? Loki?” Thor’s confused voice cut through the night. “What happened?”

“She attacked me!” Loki exclaimed, then to Sif, “Get off of me!” Sif had succeeded in reaching his throat, and now her hands were wrapped around it. She squeezed a bit, making Loki scratch at her hands. “S-stop!” he choked out.

“Sif!” She was off him in a second courtesy Fandral. He seized the girl by the waist and pulled her to the side, still fighting all the way to the ground. He looked at her as though she had lost her mind. “What were you thinking? You cannot kill a prince of Asgard!”

“Brother?” A concerned Thor materialized in front of him. His eyebrows were creased with worry as he looked Loki over for injury. “Are you alright? What happened?”

“Nothing,” he coughed. Sif was tiny but she was strong, and his windpipe now felt the brunt of that strength. “Ask her.” His narrowed glance was met with a death stare. There was no way Sif would recount the events of their squabble for fear of outing her own feelings.

Thor craned his neck to the girl. “Sif?”

“It’s like he said,” she spat. “Nothing.”

Loki sensed his time with the group had drawn to a close. He rose to his feet, dusting his jacket off as he did so. “Brother, this has been fun. Do remember not to invite me next time.”

He retreated before Thor could stop him—though the older boy did call for his return. Thoughts of portals and casting came to mind as he made his way down the well-trodden route to his chambers. Had he been able to produce more than a puff of green gas, he would have already escaped to his room. However, his inability to produce a proper getaway proved fruitful that night, for if he had not walked past the library, he would not have seen his mother scurry around the corner with a hooded figure around his height.

Loki quirked a brow. Thor had told him his mother was not even here. In fact, he had said their mother had left in a rush. So, what was she now doing here, hurrying around the place like a common thief rather than its beloved queen?

While his portal making skills were next to none, Loki had a firm grasp on cloaking. It was rather simple once he understood the mechanism. All he had to do was concentrate. He visualized his position in the hallway and thought of every cell in his body, down to the organelles and jelly. One by one, he imagined them blending into his surroundings until he was no longer visible to the naked eye. Once he was sure he had done it, he chanced a glance in a mirror hanging on the far wall. A smirk lit up his face when no reflection appeared in the glass.

Silent steps carried him in the direction his mother went. He found her sitting on a bench outside the throne room, the little figure she towed next to her. Loki could not make out the gender, for the figure had its head buried in his mother’s chest, but he did see the endings of black curls escaping the hood.

“—must go after then at once! If they get away—” A voice Loki had never heard before rang out from the throne room. It was deep and solemn, tinged with an air of an emotion so desperate and raw he could only describe it as loss. He peeked into the room to see his father standing with a ginger haired man he had never seen before. The man carried himself with an air of regality only royalty possessed. Not even the soot and charred clothing he wore could take away from that.

“Loki!” The sharp sound of his name made him jump a few feet into the air. His cloaking shattered apart. He turned, sheepish, to see his mother standing before him. Her hands on her hips and the disapproving expression on her face had him rubbing the back of his neck in shame. “It’s past your bedtime! What are you doing up walking around with cloaking?”

“Nothing…” Frigga lifted a stern brow. Loki cracked immediately. “It’s all Thor’s fault, mother! He dragged me away from the library to partake in a very disappointing tine. Why he thinks I’d enjoy getting drunk off ale instead of rea…”. The look on Frigga’s face made Loki trail off. He realized, with consternation, that he had inadvertently sold his brother out.

Frigga pursed her lips. “Well, it seems as though I’ll be having a talk with your brother tomorrow. I suppose Fandral was involved as well? And poor Sif was along for the ride?” Loki rolled his eyes.

“I’d hardly think her an unwilling participant—”

“What was that?” Loki snapped his mouth shut and shook his head. “Good. Now come. I was going to wait until tomorrow but since you’re here, there’s someone I’d like you to meet.” His mother took him by the hand and led him over to the bench upon which the figure sat. Now that they were no longer sequestered in his mother’s bosom, Loki could see that it was a girl about his age. “Loki, this is Princess Sigrid of Vanaheim.”

Loki blinked. He had heard a lot about the Vanir princess from travelers and nobles alike. Everyone knew how her father, King Ivan, had fallen in love with a mortal on one of his many travels to Midgard (which Loki had never understood for Midgard seemed like such a savage place). He had gone on to shock the realm by not only marrying her but making her queen and producing an heir with her.

Never had he seen the girl before, but others spoke of her a lot. Half-breed, they called her. Dim-witted and deformed, they would say. A princess of Vanaheim tainted by mortal blood. Loki decided there and then that those people were lying and had never actually seen the girl, for the specimen before him was nothing like they said. In fact, she was quite pretty.

The cloak she wore was charred and she smelled like smoke, but it did little to mar the intrigue of the girl beneath. Her hair was a mass of wild, black curls that were darker than his own hair. Smooth skin, a few tones darker and fair where his was white, stretched over round cheeks and a button nose that was unlike the straight ones of the Aesir. Her lips were set in a frown, dented with teeth marks from gnawing at them, and her lashes were so long that Loki wondered if a breeze was conjured when she blinked.

Even her tear-filled eyes were interesting. They were brown like Sif’s, though warmer in a way. Looking closer, Loki could see flecks of gold in the irises. He briefly wondered what they would look like in the sun. Perhaps like melted chocolate? Or maybe a pool of honey? Running copper also seemed like—

“Would you like a portrait?” The snap that emanated from the girl was so rough that he had to blink twice to make sure it came from the sweet face before him.

“I—”

“What’s the matter?” she asked again, brushing pass his stammer. “Haven’t you ever seen a girl before?”

Loki gaped at the girl. He looked to his mother, who wore an expression of utmost amusement, then narrowed his eyes at the girl. “You can’t speak to me like that!”

“Says who?” The girl folded her arms. Her thick brows drew together in annoyance.

“Says me!” Loki exclaimed. “I am a prince—”

“And I am a princess, what’s your point?”

Loki felt the strange urge to stamp his foot. “Mother!”

“Alright,” Frigga placed a hand on either of their shoulders. “That’s enough. Loki, Sigrid is going to be staying with us for a while—”

“How long? Is that why the Vanir king is here?”

“Yes, and for as long as she needs,” Frigga said. She returned to her seat next to the girl and brushed some soot from her tear-stained face. “She’s been through a lot, and it is no longer safe for her on Vanaheim—”

“Why, did something happen?” Loki had already deduced that a fire had been involved in whatever drove the royalty to Asgard, but he could not see how that lead to the princess having to stay with them. “And why does she smell like smoke? King Ivan, too, looked like his clothes were a flame away from falling off—”

“Has anyone ever told you you talk too much?” Again, Loki gaped at the girl. There was just so much anger in her. Her fists were balled at her sides, face clenched and red, though beneath her trembling lip belied another emotion entirely. “Stop asking so many questions!”

Before Loki could retort, his mother’s hand appeared under his chin. “Son,” her eyes were shining with sorrow, “I humbly ask that you curb your curious nature for the time being. The princess is in no mood for questions right now. I’m going to need you and Thor to be kind to her while she’s here. Can you do that for me?”

Loki looked to the girl again. Her head had returned to his mother’s shoulder, and tears were trickling down her face. It appeared what had happened was bad, for her emotions were giving him a wicked whiplash. Yet, he could not deny his mother. “Of course, mother. Whatever you say.”

“Good.” Her eyes flicked behind him. Loki followed her gaze to see his father and the Vanir king. Odin shook his head upon seeing Loki up so late. Drawing near, he ruffled his hair with a battle-hardened hand. The princess got up and ran over to her own father.

“Son.”

“Father.” Loki leaned into his father. He glanced up at the man next to him and bowed his head in respect. “King Ivan.”

“Ah! The young prince Loki.” Ivan tried for a cheery tone, and he would have succeeded had his eyes not been so red and broken. “I’ve heard a lot about you and your brother from Odin here. How old are you now, boy?”

“Fifteen, your majesty,” answered Loki. The king gave a tired smile.

“The same age as my girl here.” He patted Sigrid’s head, who was now engulfing her father in a tight hug. “Sigrid, have you met the prince?”

“Yes, papa, I have.” She sounded so different now from when she was ripping into Loki just a few seconds before. “Are you really leaving me here? I don’t know anyone here.” She shot a rather harsh look at Loki. “And I don’t think I want too.”

A pained expression crossed the king’s face. He seemed as torn as any man could be, and Loki decided he had to figure out just what in the Hel was going on. When King Ivan pulled his daughter aside to talk to her in private, he craned his head up to look at his father. “Father, what is going on? Please don’t tell me that girl has to stay with us.”

The corner of Odin’s mouth turned up. He gave his wife a look before taking a seat next to her. “Do you dislike the girl already? Is there anyone who is up to your standards?” A blush threatened to bloom on Loki’s face as he thought of Fjor. He fought it back as he answered his father.

“She’s horrid! She talks to me like I’m not even a prince, it’s so rude!”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” his father said. “I thought you’d befriend her before anyone else. Her father tells me she likes books and studies like you.” Loki made a mental note to place a guard on his favorite shelf of books so she could not get to them. “She’s going to be with us for a while, and I’d really like your help with this. Can you help me with this, son?”

Loki’s resolve faltered. “Why can’t you ask Thor? Girls prefer him anyway.” Bitterness twisted the end of his sentence. He could already imagine the scowling girl becoming perky at the sight of his golden brother. Another girl for him to ignore Sif with.

“Thor will have to help, of course. I’m sure he’d be glad too.” Odin gave Loki a meaningful look with his lone eye. “Is this too much of a task for you? Should I let your brother go it alone? I would think this would be a good way to build your people skills for the future—”

“I can do it!” Loki decided that at the very least, he could use this as practice for the future. As king he would have to engage in negotiations and conversations with people he may not be fond of, and this girl provided the perfect opportunity to figure out how to do so. He was getting rather good at using his words to get what he wanted from people, anyways. Also, the girl was a small thing. How much trouble could she be? “I’ll do it, father.”

“Good!” Odin beamed and ruffled Loki’s a hair. A little bit of pride shot through him. He so loved making his father proud. “Who knows? You may come to enjoy her company in time. Perhaps it may been blossom into more than that?”

Loki pulled a face. He looked towards the princess again. Her father was down on one knee—because she was so short that he had to bring his towering frame down by half to look her in the eyes—-wiping away what looked like fresh tears. It was as though she sensed him watching. She turned her head towards his and gave him a hard stare, which he returned with one of his own before turning back to his parents.

“I’ll be kind to her,” Loki said, even as he thought of ways to make mischief and upset her. “But mark my words, dear parents. I am never, ever, going to like this girl.”

“Yes, but these were constellations.” Ingrid did not even lift a brow at her attempt at differentiation. “And there was no need to bother either of you. The princes were with me, so was the Queen.”

“So you’ve said thrice now.” Sigrid stayed silent. It was a blue moon when Ingrid would become agitated. The girl was so energetic on a daily that Sigrid often forgot how protective of her she could be. Through it all Sigrid was akin to a savior in her eyes. Without her intervention, there was no telling where Ingrid would have ended up.

“Ingrid?” Her hand reached behind her to rest on Ingrid’s. “I’m sorry. You’re right. I should have at least sent word to you.” She tilted her head towards Agathe, who had exhibited unusual restraint in bestowing a tongue lashing on Sigrid since the morning began. “Both of you. It was just the last thing on my mind at the moment.”

Agathe nodded. “I understand your thoughts would have been otherwise occupied. In future, just have a page send word to us so we know you’re okay. We may just be your servants, but we care about you too.”

“Precisely,” she heard Ingrid mumble. If it was not against her, Sigrid would have been impressed that the two were on the same page for once.

“You’re not just my servants, you’re my friends.” Ingrid pushed on Sigrid’s shoulders for her to take a seat at her vanity. “Never forget that.”

“We shan’t.” Agathe moved to stand behind her, already gathering pieces of her hair for a simple half up braid crown. “Would you like me to put those flowers in your hair? The ones on the pillow?”

She was referring to, Sigrid knew, the gardenias Loki had left. They were a beautiful white and smelled sweeter than the honey their childhood chef used to drizzle over her signature flaky pastries. She and Thor had developed a habit of sneaking away to eat them before supper until the chef caught on. “Yes, please.”

“What do they stand for?”

“Hmm?” Sigrid looked to Agathe for clarification.

“The flowers. All flowers have a meaning.” She plucked one from the pile and inserted it in one of the two thick braids held together behind Sigrid’s head. “I’m well versed in Asgardian flora. Midgardian, not so much.”

“I’m afraid I don’t know what they mean, just the names.” Sigrid twirled one between her thumb and forefinger. The tiered petals made for a captivating sight as it spun on its stem. “I should ask Loki. He left them so he must know.”

“I should think a gorgeous prince leaving flowers for a gorgeous princess would point to one reason in particular,” spoke Ingrid. The regular cheekiness was back in her voice, which meant Sigrid felt free to admonish her for her not so subtle comment. Before she could, however, a few solid raps sounded at her door. “I’ll get it!” Ingrid hopped to her feet and towards the door. Magne was standing in the doorway when she opened it.

“Princess,” he bowed low, dark blonde hair sweeping over his forehead. “Lady Agathe, Lady Ingrid.” It could have been her imagination, but Sigrid swore Magne’s eyes lingered on Ingrid just a moment too long.

“Hello, Magne.” Ingrid curtsied,face flushed. A look to Agathe found her with the same baffled expression that she was sure mirrored her own. What in Odin’s name had happened to their little firecracker?

“Good morning, Magne. What brings you here?” The sound of Sigrid’s voice snapped the two youths out of staring at each other. Ingrid took a step back. Her face was almost as red as her hair as she made a hasty excuse to leave the room. Sigrid made a mental note to use Magne as her trump card anytime Ingrid decided to make any more allusions to her relationship with Loki.

“Sir Leif requests the pleasure of your company. He departs for Vanaheim in a few hours and would like to see you before he goes. I also have a message from Prince Loki.” He waited for her nod to relay to message. “The prince says he is in a meeting with his brother and father, but he should not be long. He wants to know if you’ll accompany him to town for lunch after the meeting is over.”

“Tell the prince I accept. I’ll just be in the courtyard.” Magne nodded. “And please tell Sir Leif I’ll be right with him.

ooOOoo

Leif was standing a few feet away from Sigrid’s door when she exited her room. He simpered upon seeing her, pushing off the wall to extend a hand. “Leif.”

“Sigrid.” He kissed her hand in greeting. “You look stunning this morning.” Sigrid gave him a little smile of her own. Leif was still as sweet as she had remembered, and she was glad that centuries of training and battle had not succeed in beating that out of him. “Not at all remnant of someone who pitched headfirst off a bridge.” Sigrid let out a snort.

“Gods.” She covered her mouth, a bit humiliated by the sound she had just made. “I hate when that happens.”

Leif’s eyes sparked with an unreadable emotion. “Don’t be. I’m glad I can still elicit such a reaction from you.” He offered her an arm and she took it without a second thought. “All jokes aside, are you sure you’re okay? You took quite the fall last night.”

“I’m fine.” Sigrid had said those words so many times in the past twelve hours that they had lost all meaning to her. “A little shaken up but I’m alive and that’s what matters.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t do more.” Leif’s confession drew her attention to his face. A morbid expression donned his features. “You fell and I just froze. I never freeze. Prince Loki was quite irate at my lack of reaction, although I cannot blame him. And I must say his magic is quite terrifying.” Sigrid winced.

“I know you’re not fond of each other, and I’m not making an excuse for him,” here, Leif lifted a brow in confusion, “but he was just afraid. You must understand that Loki was just trying to save me.”

“Sigrid, you’ve read me all wrong.” Leif placed a hand on hers. It was warm and calloused, fingers thick from years of using a sword. They were so unlike Loki’s slender, long digits. “Of course, the prince was just trying to save you. I’m saying it was impressive. I’ve never encountered magic that was not used against me in battle. It was truly magnificent to see it in a different light.”

They had crossed into the hallway now, allowing the sun to shine right into Sigrid’s eye. She brought a hand up to her forehead to shield her face from the rays. “We share different views on magic here on Asgard. Unlike the Vanir, we believe it can also be used for good. Our healers have been using it for some decades well to heal wounds and illnesses that would otherwise kill our citizens.”

“Is that why the prince learned it?” Leif questioned. This answer she knew.

“At first he learned it because his mother wanted him to have his own hobby to set him apart. Frigga always said Loki had a talent for seidr, but it was not until years later did she realize just how good he would become.” Sigrid gave a small giggle. “When we were little, he liked to use it for silly things. He’d put snakes in Thor’s bed or make his food levitate so he could not reach it.”

“Did these pranks extend to you?”

“Not at all. I got flowers and little fireworks shows.” Leif quirked his lips in a knowing manner. “What?”

“Nothing,” he replied. “I’m just wondering how it is you never bothered to learn it yourself.”

Sigrid shrugged. “Some Vanir beliefs die hard, I guess. Although I am quite comfortable with Loki using it near me. I can’t count the number of times he’s had to heal minor injuries from me getting hurt. He says I’m the clumsiest person he’s ever known. Can you believe that?”

“I can.” Sigrid gave him a look. “Sigrid, you have always been a clumsy girl. Do you remember when we were learning to ride horses? You stepped onto the stirrup and fell right over the other side of the poor creature.”

“I told you that stirrup was broken!”

“Is that why it dislodged itself and got tangled in your foot?” Leif had begun to laugh at her. “You were so tiny. Just dangling over the edge of the horse whilst the instructor attempted to right you.”

Sigrid shoved him with all her might. Against his large stature, it did nothing. “I’ll have you know I’m a fine rider now. And that horse back home never liked me anyway. He was always nudging me with his head.”

“I think he just wanted to play with you,” Leif’s grey eyes were still dancing. She had always thought they resembled the colour of the sky before a storm. The calm, quiet eeriness that signaled the onslaught of violent rainfall. “Everything here is so different. I’m sure to miss it when I leave.”

Sigrid deflated. She had known he was due to leave that day before she had gone to meet him. Yet their conversation had occurred with such a naturality that the sudden mention of his departure revealed how much she had enjoyed having him here. “Perhaps you can visit again?”

Her suggestion shocked not only her, but her companion as well. “Are you certain?”

“Yes.” Ah. Loki is just going to love this. “Yes I am. We are old friends are we not?”

“Friends?” came a new voice. “Is that what you were? Because I heard it went deeper than that.”

Leif was the first to react to the voice. Both his eyebrows knit—the voice clearly one he knew—before he turned to the golden-haired girl. “Eva?”

“Leif,” she gave him a tight smile, then let her eyes wander to Sigrid. “Princess.”

“Lady Eva.” Just like the first time she had met her, all the hairs on Sigrid’s body stood up. She felt like a cat that had just had cold water poured on it. There was somethingabout this woman that continued to rub her the wrong way. “You two know each other?” It was Leif who answered.

“Yes. Her mother is one of the king’s advisors. We know each other from living at the palace.”

“An advisor?” Sigrid echoed. “Your mother?”

“Yes,” Eva lifted a brow in challenge. “Have you an issue?”

“I was not aware my father took on women as advisors. I’m glad to see he’s changed his mind.” Sigrid wondered if she had offended this girl in some way. Lady Eva always came across a little standoffish to her. Or maybe her own feelings were colouring her perception. “How come neither of you knew the other was here?”

“I’ve been on the hunt for months and I came straight here when I returned,” Leif explained with a frown. “Honestly, we’re not that close.”

“Come now Leif,” Lady Eva purred. “We don’t want to give the princess the wrong idea.” She said the word ‘princess’ with such disdain it almost made Sigrid’s head spin. “We run in the same circles. How else would I know the real reason the king sent you here?”

Sigrid’s eyes flicked to Leif. She found him glaring at Lady Eva, jaw clenched in the first real hint of anger she had ever seen him portray. “Leif, what is she on about? Did my father not send you here for a visit?”

Lady Eva let out a snort of laughter. “A visit? Is that that what he told you?”

“My time here has nothing to do with you, Eva.” Leif warned. “I think it best you mind your business.” Lady Eva set her chin. Despite her obvious plans to cause trouble, Sigrid had to admit there was an air of confidence about her that was not to be denied.

“I disagree. Your visit here may very well spell change for Vanaheim, and instead of doing as you were told you’re leaving.” She tossed her golden hair with a roll of her ocean eyes. “It’s a good thing I came here. I knew you wouldn’t be able to go through with it.”

“Go through with what?” Sigrid had grown very cross with the two Vanir in front of her. It was one thing for Eva to insert herself where she was not needed. Add to that some dirty looks and some obvious secret keeping and now she just wanted answers. “I’m going to ask one more time,” she announced in her best princess voice. “What is going on?”

Eva looked to her, then Leif, then gave a shrug. “If you won’t tell her, I will.” Leif gave a sigh of relent.

“Okay.” He turned to Sigrid. “Okay. I have not been totally forthcoming with you. You see, your father did send me here for a visit, but the terms were conditional.”

Sigrid lifted a brow. Unease had already begun to stir in the pits of her stomach. “Conditional upon what?”

“Sigrid,” Leif took one of her hands in his. “Your father, the king… I was sent here to court you.”

“I- What?” She brought her hand back to her side. “Why? And why didn’t you tell me before?” Leif’s look was frantic.

“You have to understand that neither I nor your father meant no harm. He wants you to take his throne and become the Queen you are meant to be. Unfortunately…” he trailed off.

“Unfortunately, what?”

“Vanaheim has laws,” explained Leif, “and the laws state that an unmarried princess cannot become a queen.”

“My father would never force me to adhere to such a law!” Sigrid was livid. “Countless princesses have been made queen in the past without being married! Why should I have to be the exception?”

Lady Eva folded her hands together. “Because you are not just of the Vanir. Your mother was Midgardian. There are people who want to make sure you marry a full-bred Vanir and not surprise them with a Midgardian after your coronation like your father. They don’t want the bloodline to be anymore watered-down.” The look Sigrid gave her was scathing. “Their words, not mine. I could care less about your heritage.”

“Leif, is that what you were trying to tell me last night on the bridge?” Her mind wandered back to their conversation, right before she had cut him off and changed the subject. “You said we needed to have a discussion. Was it about it this?”

“Yes,” he admitted. “I wanted to tell you, and I felt so terrible coming here with an ulterior motive. Sigrid, I meant what I said the first day I got here. It truly has been a pleasure getting to know you again.”

“You should have told me what was going on! And why would my father think that I would be so open to this?”

“Perhaps he thought you would not mind,” Eva said, “seeing as you and Leif were once lovers.” A strangled noise alerted her that another person was witness to the tête-à-tête. Even worse than the eavesdropping was the fact that she knew without fail who had made the noise.

“Loki.” He was already retreating by the time she turned around, long legs taking him away from her in quick strides. It only took a few steps for his lanky form to disappear into the palace. “Oh Gods!” Sigrid placed a hand to her forehead. When she returned to the two Vanir, there was a smug expression on Eva’s face.

“You knew he was there!” Sigrid swung a finger up to her face. She felt Leif put a restraining hand on her arm. “Didn’t you?” Eva gave an innocent blink.

“I am not in charge of the prince’s whereabouts.”

“Bitch.” Savagery dripped off the snarl, causing Eva’s face to drop at the swear. “You absolute bitch!”

“Sigrid.” It was Leif, hand still strong on her upper arm. “Go after Loki. Explain everything to him.”

“But my father-”

“Sigrid, I will handle your father. He’s quite fond of me.” Leif’s eyes were earnest as he peered down at her. “Don’t worry about me. Go. I’ll take Eva back home with me.”

Eva made a noise of protest. “You cannot—”

“I can. You’ve caused enough trouble.” Leif’s tone was final. “Sigrid, go. I’ll write you soon.”

“Thank you,” she whispered. Her mind was a mess as she gathered her skirts. “I-I’ll write you back, I promise.”

“Sigrid, go.” She did not need to be told another time.

Sigrid ran down the path Loki had taken as fast as her feet would carry her. The decision to wear a lifted heel had turned out be an incorrect one, for they were not built for more than a gentle walk. With a loud curse, she reached down and tore the things off. Bare feet would help her catch up to Loki faster, anyway.

“Loki!” She spotted him as she rounded the corner.

“Leave me be, Sigrid.” His tone was clipped, back still to her as he made his way to the library doors. He pushed them open with more force than was necessary and stomped inside. Sigrid entered just a few moments behind him.

He was hunched over a desk when she spotted him, scribbling with such fury that the sound of nib touching paper scratched through the air. She knew that he was aware of her presence. It was hard to sneak up on him, having the powers he possessed, so she knew his ignorance was purposeful. “Loki, let me explain.”

“There’s nothing to explain. I heard it all.” He still would not look at her. “Please close the door on your way out.” Sigrid pretended she did not hear his attempt at a dismissal.

“You did not hear it all,” she insisted. “There was some truth to what Eva said but not entirely—”

“How can there be some truth?” Loki looked at her then, and a million and one emotions rippled over his face. His eyes, though, were shining with the most unhinged fury. “It’s either you were his lover, or you weren’t, so which was it?”

“We liked each other,” she admitted. There was no point in hiding the truth from him anymore. “A lot. At first I thought he was just spending time with me as a favour to our fathers but the more we talked the more I came to understand that he genuinely wanted to be around me. And I, him.”

“So, he was your first love.”

“Yes, or at least what I thought was love.” Loki lifted a brow. “I was fourteen, Loki. I was not well versed in matters of the heart.”

“And the night of the fire? When you two were in the stables together?” He gave a small shrug. “You’ve never mentioned that before.”

“I- We used to sneak out to the stables at night because it was the only place that would not have servants.” Sigrid clasped her hands together at her waist. “I was afforded even less mistakes than a full-blooded Vanir princess would have been. If anyone caught me with Leif, they would have tried to question my virtue and therefore my claim to the throne. More than they already were, that is.”

“So, am I to believe that two teenagers snuck out to be alone just to talk?”

Sigrid folded her arms. So far, she had answered all of his questions without hesitating, so she did not appreciate what he was implying. “If you’re asking if I fucked Leif, the answer is no. Although it would not be any of your concern if I had, and you have no right to be mad about that.”

Loki scoffed. “You’ve made it quite clear what is and is not my business. It’s funny, though. I never took you for a liar.”

“Don’t be an ass,” she spat. She unfolded her arms and walked right up to him. Her neck hurt with the effort it took to keep her eyes on his from this angle. It was only the sheer refusal to look away from his glare that sustained her. “I never lied to you.”

“You lied by omission.” His tone was matter of fact. “Of course it’s not my business who you choose to sleep with. That’s not what I’m mad about. I’m mad that you chose to omit Leif from your story, and you choseto let me believe he was a mere acquaintance.” He spread his hands with a flourish. “Lies.”

“Now I know the God of Lies is not giving me a lecture on the truth.” Her voice had risen past the acceptable decibel level for the library. “You are dishonest all the time.”

Loki’s jaw clenched. “I am not-”

“Yes, you are! You are!”

“Not to you!” He growled. “I do not lie to you; I have never lied to you!” Loki was shouting by the time he finished, and it shocked Sigrid well out of her wits. Never had she been on the receiving end of his vexation. Now that she was, she did not like it one bit. “Does that count for nothing?”

Sigrid’s breath caught in her throat. Part of her knew that Loki had always treated her differently than everyone else. He did not snap at her, or raise his voice, or prank her like he did to everyone else. Throughout their entire friendship she had been the exception. So why, now, had things begun to change?

“Loki—”

“Forget it.” His mask slipped back into place. All the hurt and disbelief was now replaced by a blank stare. “I’ve known this was going to happen one day. I suppose it was foolish of me to assume our friendship would make it through this.”

“What are you talking about?” Her voice was overcome with puzzlement. “Make it through what?”

“You have to be married to be queen, do you not?” Sigrid blinked. Loki caught her unspoken question and answered with a wave of his hand. “I’ve always known the Vanir laws. I did not, however, know that your spouse would already be chosen for you.”

“Loki, that’s not what’s happening here. I’m not marrying anyone. My father—”

“Your father concealed the truth from you because he knew as well as I do that you would not react well to being forced. But the fact is that you have two choices; you can choose to marry Leif and take the throne you’ve always wanted, or you can refuse and give it up.” Loki shook his head. “Since you’ve no siblings, there’s really only one path is there?”

Sigrid threw her hands up. “I still do not see what that has to do with our friendship! Nothing has to change—”

“Sigrid, it has already changed!” Frustration lined the edge of the trickster’s tone. “It changed the moment that letter was sent. Do you really think we can maintain the friendship we have when you go back to Vanaheim? I doubt your husband would take kindly to me sleeping in your bed when I pop in for a visit.”

“You’re talking about things that have not yet happened,” she enunciated each word as though he were slow. “Any romantic feelings I had for Leif are long gone. He’s just a friend now, one that I barely know anymore.”

“Because you had to leave.”

A beat passed. “What?”

“The only reason your feelings for him went away is because you were forced to leave,” Loki elaborated. “You were thrown into an unimaginable situation, and you adapted better than I ever could have. If you had stayed on Vanir, you two would have already been wed, but you didn’t and that’s why your feelings went away; because they had too.” Loki took a pause, gauging his next words with care. “How am I to believe that your return to Vanaheim will not result in the same for me?”

Sigrid’s mouth opened and closed a few times before she finally figured out what to say. “That’s not the same thing and you know it.”

“Do I?” He took a step closer to her. Their noses were nearly touching now. In the past Sigrid had never been bothered by his being near her. He was one of the few people she allowed to touch her without asking permission each time. This time, however, she found herself a bit jittery under the intensity of his gaze. “Do I really know that? Because I think you’ll throw yourself into your role as queen so well that you’ll convince yourself you a love a man we both know is not the one for you.”

“We royals do not always get the privilege of following our hearts.” The breathlessness in her voice was most unexpected. “You and I have always known that.”

“Hmm.” Loki lifted a hand to cup her cheek. Her eyes closed as the smooth pad of his thumb dragged across her skin. “Yes. I suppose we have.”

A warmth appeared in her curled fist. She opened her eyes, unfurling her fingers to see a dark, crimson rose in her palm. “What does this mean?”

“Pardon me?” His voice was a murmur.

“The flowers,” she held up the rose in her palm. “You would always give me pink tulips before. Why have they changed?”

Loki stared at her for a while. His thumb was still caressing her face, leaving goosebumps on her skin with every stroke. “I do not know,” he said. “I don’t pick the flowers before I conjure them. My mood chooses them for me and they just appear.”

Sigrid ran a finger over the petal. It was not the usual red rose she was used to, hue too deep and resembling clotted blood rather than a fresh bleed. “What do you feel now?”

“I feel as though I am at a funeral,” he told her, “for I know a tide has turned and we shall never be the same again.” Sigrid knew not what to say. She just let Loki pull her forward to place a kiss on her forehead. “I must go now. Thor is waiting for me. Father is sending us to Alfheim again and I cannot be late.”

“How long will you be gone?” She was still reeling from his words but managed to get out this simple inquiry.

“Not long. A few days to a week.” His hand dropped from her face. “You should not worry about me. I will be fine.” He moved towards the door in record time, cape floating with the speed of his steps. “Perhaps I may catch Leif at the bridge if I’m quick. I owe him an apology for my insolence.”

“I already spoke to him. He understands you’re just protective.”

Loki gave her a half smile over his shoulder that did not quite reach his eyes. “Ever my defender. What would I do without you?” She gave no answer. If his words were true, he would have to figure it out soon enough. “Take care of yourself while I’m away. And for the love of Odin, don’t go falling off anymore bridges. I’ll see you soon.”

Sigrid wanted to say something. A well wish? A ‘take care’? Anything would have been better than nothing. Instead she stayed silent, her attention turned to the rose in her palm. And when she heard the door close—silent, so as not to startle her—the tears slipped down her face, gathering in the crevices of the petals.

Chapter 8

“Yes.” Eva said, as though the request were not utterly insane. “I would like to speak to you.” Sigrid shared a wary look with Leif. By the sound of the exasperated sigh Eva let out, it was clear she caught it. “I’m not going to harm you, Sigrid. You can call off your guard.”

Leif closed the door in, just a little, so Eva could not hear them. “Do you wish to speak with her? I can have her removed if not.”

“No, it’s okay.” The words surprised Sigrid as they left her mouth. “You can let her in.”

“Do you want me to stay?” The agreement that Eva had not tried to poison her did not erase the large distrust Leif carried for the girl. “I can stay in the corner, or right outside the door.” Eva rolled her eyes but stayed silent.

“Leif, it’s fine. I can handle myself.” Leif did not look convinced. “Leif, go.” She gave him a gentle shove out the door. “I’ll be fine. Eva will not hurt me.”

Leif put out a hand to stop her pushing as he left the room. “Send for me if you need anything.” His eyes darted to Eva. “At all.”

“Yes, she will,” said Eva. “Bye now.” The girl closed the door in the face of an offended Leif and turned to Sigrid. “I thought he’d never leave. He’s like a lost… What do they call it on Midgard? Oh! Puppy! He’s like a lost puppy!”

Sigrid shifted from one foot to another. Now that Leif had left, a tense atmosphere ensued between the estranged sisters. “Can you blame him for wanting to stay? You’ve not exactly been kind to me.” Eva folded her arms.

“That’s actually why I’m here.” She ducked her head to tuck a blonde lock behind her ear, and when she glanced back at Sigrid, curiosity was abounded in her expression. “I heard you dropped the charges against me. Why?”

“Well, you have Loki to thank for that. He didn’t think you did it and he’s usually correct about these things. The more I thought about it, the more I realized it all sounds like a set up. Leif agrees as well.”

“Oh,” Eva replied, like she had not considered Loki or Leif would believe she was innocent. “Well, I’ll have to thank the prince. I haven’t seen him around—”

“He’s returned to Asgard.” Sigrid was quick to stop all talks of Loki. “For a while. His family needed him home.”

“Oh, okay. I guess I’ll thank him when he returns.” Eva nodded, then quieted down. One of her hands began drawing nervous patterns on the skin of her upper arm, and Sigrid noticed she was doing the same. She secured both her hands behind her back before addressing the girl again.

“Is that all you came here to tell me?”

“No it is not.” Eva closed her eyes. The seconds ticked by, and Sigrid felt herself getting antsy.

“Eva—”

“I’m sorry.” She opened her eyes. “I want to apologize for my behaviour. I knew it was not fair to you to resent you for things that were out of your control, but I did it anyway. That immaturity is not a proper reflection of who I am. If I’m being honest, my anger was never really directed at you. I was frustrated with my parents and the secrets they had me keep and you were the easiest person to take it out on. I—” Eva cut herself off. “I’m sorry.”

Sigrid stared at the girl before her. There was a lull in her response, for her jaw was on the floor, but she liked to think she recovered well. “T-thank you. The apology is appreciated.” Eva gave a nod and made to leave. “I suppose I owe you an apology as well. “

Eva furrowed her brow. “Oh?”

“For the nasty things I said about your mother. Gri has been so kind to me and she did not deserve any of it. Had my own mother heard me say it, she would have yanked my tongue right out of my head.” Eva giggled. Sigrid was taken aback by how similar to hers it sounded.

“Well, I guess that’s something both our mothers have in common,” she said. “I can see why they were friends. Mother told me stories of her and she sounded wonderful. I—” Eva stopped talking. “I’m sorry. I never should have brought it up. You must miss her terribly.”

“No, it’s okay.” Sigrid had long grown used to the dull ache that lit her chest whenever her mother was mentioned. “I love talking about her, I just never really had anyone around who knew her besides my father. All I have are anecdotes of my time with her and whatever tidbits papa chose to tell me. Gri had offered to tell me more but…”

“Right,” Eva smacked her lips together. “All of that happened. Although…” she trailed off.

“Although what?”

“Mama has told me many stories about Queen Lilibet. I feel like I know her myself, which makes me feel horrible for the quips I made against her, but I can tell you some if you’d like. I know you are not speaking to either of them at the moment—”

“No, I am not. I have not spoken to papa since the night you were accused.” The night that Loki left.

“Neither have I,” Eva admitted. “Mama has been much harder to avoid. It does not matter that I am upset with her, too. She still checks up on me. I spoke to her just a few hours ago before she and papa left.”

“Left?” Sigrid echoed. “Where did they go?” Eva shrugged.

“They were called away suddenly. It must be very serious for both of them to have gone.”

“Will we be safe?” asked Sigrid, concerned that she was alone in the palace without anyone to protect her besides Leif. “Will they?”

“Of course,” Eva replied. “This is not the first time they’ve left the palace together, and they have guards with them.”

“But someone tried to poison me,” Sigrid countered. “And then they tried to frame you for it. It doesn’t seem wise for them to have left.”

“Sigrid, I assure you you are safe here. Lord Erling is the head of the army, and he and all his men are here. Papa even added a second row of guards outside your door and two more lining the halls. Leif is here, I am here and if push comes to shove you have a wicked grip.” Eva smirked at her. “That can be put to good use.”

“So sorry about that.” Sigrid scratched the back of her neck. “I swear I don’t like violence, but I just get so mad sometimes and you get me really mad.”

Eva rolled her eyes. “If we’re being honest, I totally meant to cut you. I know of your boyfriend’s magical abilities, and I knew he would be able to heal you. I was never going to cause any permanent damage.”

“Well,” Sigrid smirked, and placed her hands on her hips, “if we’re being honest, I was totally about to grind your face into the dirt had Loki not grabbed ahold of me. I’m not above fighting dirty if I have too.”

“No!” Eva mocked, and Sigrid stifled a laugh. “Not the perfect little princess!”

“Ugh, is that what people really think of me?” Eva shrugged. “It’s so annoying. The rules of it all, how I must act, how I must dress. It’s all a bit stifling. Loki handles it much better than me.” At the mention of Loki, Sigrid sobered once again.

“What’s that?” asked Eva.

Sigrid glanced at her. “What’s what?”

“That face you just made,” Eva clarified. “Right there when you mentioned your prince. You look like you wanted to cry.” It must have been the look on her face, but Sigrid’s saw her sister’s eyes soften in her favour. “He didn’t leave on good terms, did he?” Sigrid said nothing. “Alright. I know how to fix this.”

“Fix what?” Sigrid watched as Eva reached below her dress and pulled out a glass bottle with a flourish. “What’s that?”

“Whiskey!” Eva told her. She swirled the bottle of amber liquid around. “Papa loves Midgardian spirits and I love to sneak into his private cellar and try them myself. This one is my favourite.”

“I’ve never had it,” said Sigrid. “Is it any good?”

“Depends on your individual taste. I was going to surprise Hilda with it but it is quite late to make the journey to her house. Plus, you need this more.” She opened the bottle and let Sigrid take a whiff. “Now, tell me what your prince did.”

ooOOoo

“I did not want to come here,” Loki began. “I did not want to come here at all.”

The amber glow from the healing chamber encompassed an inch of the room around the perimeter of the king’s bed. From it emanated a gentle heat, providing the only warmth in the otherwise cold room. Loki made sure to stay a proper distance from the man who had pretended to be his father for his entire life. An odd mix of emotions filled him as he looked upon the Allfather— distrust, humiliation, fury, and by far the most surprising of all: concern.

Seeing the king in such a vulnerable state had always been a mind-boggling affair. It was difficult for Loki to consolidate the strong, unapologetic head of state with the figure lying before him. Eyes closed, within the chamber and dressed in all white Odin looked like what he essentially was: an old man.

“Mother says she has brought healers from all over the realm to examine you. None so far have been able to figure out a physical reason as to why you remain under the sleep. They think,” Loki paused to consider the absurdity of his words. “They think it’s psychological. They think your mind is troubled.”

Loki shook his head. This entire thing was ridiculous. No one had asked him to go to Odin’s chamber, not Thor, nor his mother. Yet, Loki could see behind their stares and sense the underlying begging in their tones. Everyone was at their wits end with Odin’s condition. How laughable, he thought, that he was the last hope.

“There is one upside to you being like this,” Loki continued. “You, all silent and still, cannot respond. For once I can say what I have to say and you have to sit and listen.” He leaned forward and placed his elbows on his knees. This was his chance to tell Odin everything he had ever wanted to say. All the times he had held his tongue, from childhood to recently, was coming into play. There was no one to prevent him from speaking his mind now.

“I hate you,” Loki whispered. “With every fibre of my being, I hate you. I understand I’ve committed some questionable acts as an adult but what was my fault as a child? I never asked to be rescued from Jotunheim! I never asked you to bring me here!”

Footsteps nearing the chamber hushed Loki’s cries, lest someone hear him reveal his true nature. When they passed, he carried on. “I never asked to be born a frost giant. It’s not my fault I’m a monster, but you sure as Hel treated me like it was. My entire life you made me believe I had a fair chance at being king. I saw how you favoured Thor, so I thought if I did everything right I could make you love me as you loved him. I excelled at my studies, I learned seidr, I mastered combat but yet still you always overlooked me. You say you withheld the truth because you never wanted me to feel different but the way you treated me accomplished that all the same. You never loved me.”

A tear escaped his eye, and Loki reached up to wipe it. “Why did you save me, then? Clearly I was just a relic for you to barter and trade should the need ever arise. I am not your son, I was never your son. All I did was make Thor look better. The golden child, the light prince, the Mighty Thor.”

Loki shook his head. He leaned back in his chair and thought of what he wanted to say next. It was freeing to be able to talk to Odin like this, but also anxiety inducing. Years of gaslighting, punishments and manipulation made him feel like this entire thing was a farce, like Odin would jump up at any moment and yell at him.

“Though I felt slighted by you, there were things that made up for it. Mother taking me under her wing to pass on her gift of seidr was one of them.” A fond smile crossed the trickster’s face as he thought of the Allmother. “I was excellent at magic. Perfect. The best student mother had ever had and not just by her own personal bias. But of course, you never cared. Magic was too feminine for you, not at all the manly swinging of the hammer Thor does. You wrote off my gift as silly tricks. Tricks! With no thought for how it would hurt me. Nothing I did was ever good enough for you. And then…” Loki sighed. “And then came Sigrid.”

His thoughts where his girl was concerned were a fiery mess. She did not end their relationship but sending him away was not a good sign. No matter how angry she had been with him in the past, she never once did that. Sigrid was his rock, and she his, and being without her was disorienting.

“Sigrid was one of a few lights in my life. All your favoritism towards Thor seemed insignificant once she was around. She cared for me, supported me and always made sure I was okay. In turn, I did the same, and somewhere along the line I fell in love with her. Gods, I am so in love with her. She is the most precious thing in the entire universe, and any more there may be. I love her with all my heart, and I have a feeling you might have known before me, which is why I cannot understand why you would hide the fact that her father proposed we marry.” Loki’s fist tightened at his side.

“Did it bother you, Allfather, that it was me? I,” Loki pointed a thumb at himself, “the son you wrote off so long ago, had managed to procure a proposal without even trying. King Ivan wantedme to marry his daughter, he wanted me to marry Sigrid and you knew! How could you keep such a thing from me? My marriage to Sigrid would have been an asset to the realm! Did your hatred for me blind you to that? I would have been a king!”

Loki jumped to his feet. He began pacing up and down the side of the king’s bed, arms crossed behind his back. “Not that I care about being king— I’ve truly never wanted it. A throne means nothing to me. I don’t want to rule people nor do I want to make decisions for a realm. What I wanted was to be considered. I wanted to be enough— enough for you—but that hope is long gone. I will never be enough for you.”

Throughout his entire speech, the Allfather did not stir once. Loki decided it was stupid to hope for anything different. “I was enough for Sigrid—lucky, even, to have someone like her care for me. I’ve made so many mistakes and she’s stood by me through it all. However, I fear this is the one mistake I may never come back from. All she has ever asked of me is that I be honest with her, and I could not do that, and the kicker? The kicker was I did it to protect her.” Loki gave a mirthless laugh, falling back into the seat at the king’s side.

“That was my reasoning. I did it to protect her. Show of hands, who else here lied to someone in the name of protecting them?” He leaned forward and took ahold of the king’s hand, raising it in the air. “Oh, that’s right! You.” The hand was placed back at the king’s side. “Funny how we both used the same tactics. A big joke to end all jokes.”

Loki looked upon Odin’s face. There were lines and bags he had not noticed before. Perhaps the distance had taken a toll on the man and affected him more than he thought.

“I did not want to come here,” Loki said again. “Had no plans to do so. Was on my way to find some mead and my feet just led me here. The guards let me in, of course, because why would they not? According to them I am still your son. Odinson.” The word set off a bitter taste in Loki’s mouth. “Strange how it is the mother who bears and births the child but the father gets all ownership. Odinson. Laufeyson, I wish to be neither. Friggason is more appropriate. She is responsible for the person I am, as is Sigrid. I’d take her last name too if I could.”

More footsteps sounded outside the door, louder and more plentiful than before. Loki knew it was the changing of the guards signaling that it was now nighttime. His stomach rumbled; he had missed dinner. The sleep Frigga had sent him into did wonders, though he would not admit it, and he spent most of the day asleep. That also meant that all he had in his stomach was a weeks’ worth of mead and whatever bread the tavern served.

He returned his attention to Odin once again. The king lay still, unmoving as he had been when Loki arrived. Somehow, he thought he would feel better. Loki thought getting everything off his chest would help ease some of the ache, but it did not, so really there was no reason for him to remain here any longer.

“Mother says you can hear us in the sleep. Thor and I tested it as boys. We would tell you crazy things that we hoped would gain a reaction when you awoke, however none ever came.” Loki leaned forward. “I don’t know if you can hear me, but I must say this. Everyone seems to think that your awakening hinges upon my forgiveness. If that is the case, then I must apologize, for I do not forgive you. But,” Loki took a deep breath. He breathed in the air around him and expelled it through his nostrils, “I have decided to let it go.”

Hot tears trickled down his face. He was confused at first when his face became wet; his vision blurred and his eyes burned and he blinked them away, but more fell. When he realized he was crying, he let the tears fall.

“I am letting it go,” he sobbed. “The feeling less than, the favoritism, all the times I wondered why I was never enough. It’s too much. It is holding me back from the man I wish to be— the man who should be Sigrid’s husband—and I will do it no longer. I am important. I am loved. I am worthy, and I don’t need your validation. It means nothing to me, and I will no longer try to win it.” Loki swallowed as the cry caught in his throat. “I let it go. I am going to be better, and I am going to win Sigrid back, and I will never be your son again. I am done with Asgard and I am done with you. I-”

That was where he lost it. The revelation that he did not need his father to tell him what kind of man he was was freeing, and the weight that had been on his chest his entire life dissipated. For the first time in centuries, Loki was able to take a full breath. His lungs expanded to their full volume and expelled more air than they ever had. Loki dropped his head into his hands and cried—not of sadness, but of clarity. He had never needed validation from anyone, nor did he need a hammer of his own. He was worthy all on his own and he did not need a relic to prove it. He-

A pressure appeared on his shoulder. Startled, Loki looked up to see it was a hand. White, and mottled with dark veins—a hand he knew well. He followed the hand to the wrist, then the arm and finally to the person it belonged too.

“F-father?” Loki was so astounded by the sight of the king sitting up that he called him by the first name that popped into his head. “You’re awake.”

“Yes.” There was no emotion in the king’s face save for glistening eyes.

Loki. He jumped.

“Wha—”. Loki. He stood up from his seat. Odin’s hand fell to the side.

Loki knew that voice. He knewthat voice. “Sigrid?”

Loki, I need help. You have to come help me.

ooOOoo

A half hour and three glasses of whiskey later found the two girls gossiping on the floor of Sigrid’s room. The duvet of her bed had been pulled to the ground and wrapped around her whilst they sat on the plush carpet.

“He said he did it to protect me,” Sigrid slurred, “like I was some child who needed looking after. Like I made him lie to me.” She took another sip from her glass and reached over to let Eva refill it.

“I don’t think he meant any harm. I’ve seen the way Loki looks at you. That man loves you.” Being full Vanir, Eva was not as affected by alcohol as Sigrid. She was tipsy but not at all as far gone as the dark-haired girl. “Sometimes men do silly things when they are in love.”

Sigrid pouted. “That’s so right! Men are so silly! Loki was so jealous when he first met Leif. Called him Lake.”

“Ha!” Eva snorted. She wiped a hand over her lips and shifted her position so her legs were tucked beneath her. “Men are a species I do not care to understand. I’ve always preferred women.” The blonde touched a ring on her middle finger, a dreamy look overtaking her face.

“Did Hilda give that to you?” Sigrid had long picked up on the relationship between her sister and the tawny skinned woman. “Can I see it?” Eva held out her hand for Sigrid to admire the ring. It was a simple gold band, embedded with diamonds and a heart cut out in the centre. “It’s beautiful.”

“Thank you. It’s a promise ring of sorts, and sort of protection. Hilda comes from a family that used to practice seidr, and her mother taught her a bit. It’s how we met.” Sigrid leaned forward on her elbows to listen. “Mama used to take me into the forest when I was little to pick fruit for pies and desserts. I started going by myself when I got older and one day, when I was around twenty, I came across the most beautiful girl by the river healing a baby bird that had fallen from its nest. The poor thing was near death and would have surely died had Hilda not come across it.” Sigrid’s brows flew up.

“Bringing a bird back from the brink of death is strong magic. I’ve only ever seen two people perform magic like that—Loki and the Allmother.”

Eva leaned against Sigrid’s bed. An abashed look came across her face. “That’s actually what we were doing in Asgard the night I met you. She wanted an audience with Queen Frigga in hopes of being taken under her tutelage. Magic is all but outlawed in Vanaheim and her mother is limited. Her talent is being wasted.”

Sigrid frowned. “Did she get that audience with the queen?”

“No,” Eva shook her head. “I’m afraid it was my fault. After I met you, I sort of began rushing her to leave with my comments about you. I had not expected to run into you and it threw me for a loop. My behaviour upset her, so she left for Vanaheim early.”

“Oh. But everything is okay now?”

“Yup.” Eva popped the ‘p’. “Hilda is the love of my life. I knew it when I met her forty-three years ago and I will know it till the day I return to Valhalla.”

Sigrid smiled. “How long have you two been together?”

“Forty-two years.” Eva puffed out her chest, proud to show off the longevity of her relationship. “I knew she was the one for me the moment I met her and I took my chance the moment I got it. I’ve never once regretted it.” She downed her glass and began running her finger around the rim. “It’s also why I do not care to be queen. I know I am legit, and I have a true claim, but I do not want it. Being queen means I would have to provide heirs which means I would have to marry a man. Besides the fact that penises disgust me, I would never give up Hilda. She is my peace, and my forever.”

“Hmm.” Sigrid brought her glass to her lips.

“Also, she has very talented fingers. That woman plays me like a fiddle, and I’ll never find anyoneelse who can do that.” Sigrid choked on her drink.

“Eva!”

“What?” Eva laughed. “Don’t act so scandalized. From a totally objective point, your prince is quite delicious, and I know that silver tongue he is known for goes beyond speaking.” Sigrid placed her glass to the side with a giggle. Some of the whiskey she spat out had dribbled onto her necklace and was now making her skin sticky. “Oh, that’s gorgeous!”

Sigrid brushed a thumb over the oval pendant. “Loki gave it to me for my birthday. It’s sort of protection, too. He wanted to make sure he always had a way to reach me.” She reached up to unclasp the necklace and placed it on the table next to her bedside. It would need to be cleaned in the morning.

“Do you miss him?” Eva asked her. “Hilda lives but a stone’s throw away yet I miss her terribly every moment I am away from her.”

“I miss Loki all the time,” Sigrid answered. She brought her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. The alcohol had long loosened her tongue and now she was geared and ready to go. “Loki makes me feel like we are the only two people in the world. When we are together, the entire universe could break apart and I would not notice. He is like taking a breath after being submerged in water. Sometimes, when he is not around, I feel as though I might die without him. I hate it when he goes on long trips; I hate it so, but when he returns it is always with open arms and stories to tell. I could listen to him talk for hours.”

“I bet he does talk for hours,” Eva joked.

“Sometimes,” Sigrid said, “and other times he is entirely silent. I’ve gotten so used to having him around that it is killing me to not have him near. I keep thinking about how he must be blaming himself for what happened. Gosh, he is so hard on himself. I keep telling him that he needs to lighten up, to see himself as I see him. Loki may not think he is perfect but I do.” She hiccuped, and Eva placed a hand on her arm.

“You love him.” It was not a question.

Sigrid’s lower lip quivered. “I do.” The confession felt like a weight was lifted from her shoulders. “I do, I love him, and it is not a friendship love or whatever else I convinced myself it was to quell the ache that would bloom in my chest every time I saw him with another. I am in love with him.”

Eva rubbed comforting circles on her arm. “Have you told him this?”

“No.” Sigrid slapped a hand over her face. “I have not told him because I am the biggest imbecile alive. Could not even tell my best friend that I love him but I had no problem begging him to marry me in the middle of the hallway.” At Eva’s lifted brow, Sigrid waved her hand. “Long story.”

“Well, I would love to hear it, but,” Eva got to her feet, and stretched her hand for Sigrid to take, “I’m starving. I require sustenance if I’m going to drink anymore. Do you like cake?”

“I love cake.”

“Good.” Eva corked the whiskey bottle and led Sigrid to the door. “I know where the cooks keep the leftovers. There should be some healthy food, too, if you decide to be conscientious.”

“Cake sounds good,” Sigrid agreed. She grabbed her dressing robe from the hook and put it on. “Perhaps there may be pie. I love pie, but Loki hates it. He thinks it’s too gooey.”

Eva, who had been opening the door, made a face. “How can he hate pie? Does he steal candy from babies as well? I—” They stepped out into the hallway and stopped. It was quiet, eerie, and completely deserted. “Where are the guards?”

“I don’t know.” Sigrid grabbed ahold of her younger sister. The hairs on the back of her neck had risen like a cat’s hackles. “I thought you said papa added extra.”

“He did. They are not supposed to vacate their post under threat of a flogging. Unless,” Eva gripped her arm hard, blue eyes blowing wide, “unless something is amiss in the castle.” Sigrid shook her head.

“No. The guards would have gotten us to safety if that were the case. They would not leave us alone, we are sitting ducks in that room.” Sigrid looked behind her to the room, then to the vacated hall. “We cannot stay here. We must find out what is going on. Ingrid is Gods know where and Leif—Leif!” She turned to Eva. “Leif will know what is going on, we must find him.”

“What if we get hurt on the way?” Eva asked. “Sigrid, you are good with a sword but you cannot take on a threat that has pulled three rows of guards.”

“But—”

“Sigrid.” Eva gripped her shoulders, and she saw a hint of fear in the girl’s eyes. “You are not just a princess. You are the heir to the Vanaheim throne, and we cannot risk anything happening to you. You must think about your safety, for the future of Vanaheim if not just for you.”

“The tunnels!” Sigrid remembered. “The tunnels can get us to safety!”

“Yes!” Eva bounced on her feet. “Yes, you are right! Good idea!” She took ahold of her hand and pulled her down the corridor. “We must get to your library. It is not far—Oh!” Eva stumbled back into her, a yelp of surprise leaving her throat. Sigrid just managed to catch herself on the wall.

“Eva, what…” She looked to where the girl was pointing, and her stomach dropped. “Leif!”

Leif had stumbled around the corner, startling Eva and resulting in her sudden halt. He had his sword drawn, one hand pressed to his side. An alarming amount of blood poured from between his fingers. “Sigrid!” His body swayed and Sigrid rushed forward to catch him. Both girls managed to help him to the floor before he fell.

“Leif!” Blood stained Sigrid’s hands as she held his face. “Leif, what happened? What’s going on?”

“The castle, the castle is under attack.” He was breathing hard and his voice strained with every word. “You must go. Go.” Leif attempted to push her, but the blood loss had made him weak. He barely managed to move her save for a little sway.

“I don’t understand.” Rising panic filled her. Tears blurred her eyes as she tried to rouse him. “Leif, I don’t understand.”

“Sigrid!” Eva snapped her fingers in front of her face. “Sigrid, we must go! We have to leave.”

“We cannot leave Leif!” She was surprised that Eva would even think it. “He is injured!”

“We cannot carry him with us, he is too heavy!” cried Eva. The pink of her dress was spotted with Leif’s blood. “His best chance is for us to get to safety and get help. We need to get to the tunnels!”

“No.” Sigrid said.

“No?” Eva looked at her like she had grown a second head. “What do you mean no?”

“Stay with Leif,” she said, rising to her feet.

“Where are you going?” Eva’s voice was frantic. “Do not leave me!”

“It’s okay,” she said. “Eva, it’s okay. Loki can help us, I’ll be right back! Stay here. I won’t be a second!” Eva shouted behind her, but Sigrid had already taken off in the direction of her room. Her bare feet got her to the room in no time and she burst through the doors like a woman on fire.

“Where is it?” she mumbled. “Where is it— Aha!” The necklace. She had taken the necklace off and put it on the table. Sigrid launched herself at her bed and snatched it up. “Loki,” she spoke into it, “Loki. Loki, I need help. You have to come help me!” A loud scream drew her attention. “Eva!” She dropped the necklace and sped out into the hallway.

Eva was lying on the floor next to Leif when she arrived. Red stained the blonde of her hair. Sigrid fell to her knees beside the two. “Eva? Leif?” She shook them to no avail. Her fingers sought out their necks and she sighed with relief when she felt a pulse from both of them, although Leif’s was thready. “You just have to hold on. Both of you, hold on. I’ll get you help, just wait. Please, hold on.”

“Princess.” Sigrid stiffened. She knew that voice.

“Lord Bjorn,” replied Sigrid as the carrot haired man came into view. “Fancy seeing you here.” He sneered at her, baring yellow teeth that begged for a brush.

“I haven’t seen your boyfriend in a while. He get bored of you already? Decided he no longer wanted to consort with a half breed?”

Sigrid gave a tight smile. “Something like that.” Her fingers inched along Leif’s arm, waiting for her moment. She needed to keep Bjorn talking and distracted. “I assume my guards are missing by your doing, my lord?”

“Something like that,” he replied. “Now my path to you is unhindered. It’s a shame you were not lit on fire like your mother. Had you not been with Erling’s boy, you would have been. He’ll have to go too. Annoying little thing.”

Her fingers closed around the hilt of Leif’s sword. As Lord Bjorn took a step towards her, she lashed out at him. The tip of the blade caught his chest and she heard him audibly gasp. “You bitch! Little wench!” She did not wait to hear anymore.

Sigrid took off running down the corridor. She slashed her hand open with the sword and slapped it against the wall, letting the blood provide a trail for Loki to follow. He knew where the library was but he did not know the tunnels that lead out; she had forgotten to tell him.

“Heimdall!” She called out. “Heimdall, can you hear me? I need you to—Ah!” Her head was yanked back with a decapitating force. Before Sigrid could see who it was, the hand pushed her head forward. The last thing she saw was the wall coming at her.

Chapter 24