Sep 8, 2023
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Week 1- Abundance/Beginnings
Yeah ok ok ok.
so a lot of the time grian is portrayed as aloof, self-serving - but that's not what he's really like, is it? for all that grian gets a reputation of being cold and uncaring, if you look at how he is with his allies, it's quite the opposite. grian has such a capacity for fierce devotion that he's displayed time and time again - and the reason why it gets overlooked is because that devotion only lasts as long as the person it's directed at is there to receive it. grian will be unquestionably loyal to his allies, but only up until they die. he doesn't stay loyal after death. what's interesting about that, however, is that it doesn't mean he doesn't care. rather, i think he cares too much - not in general, but in his own eyes.
scott says, "never seen a man drop a pair of sunglasses quicker", to which grian replies, "my boys died", as if that explains everything. and it does. because that's the crux of it, isn't it? we all know that grian, at heart, is a survivor - but i don't think it's his life that he wants so desperately to protect. if it was, he wouldn't be nearly so daring, so willing to put himself out there - no, there are ways to play the game carefully, and grian knows this. the reason why he's as guarded as he is, why he will do his best to take and take and take until the universe has nothing left to give, is because he's scared of the grief that he would feel if he let the relationships he makes be more than something temporary that he allows himself to care for only for as long as it exists. if he doesn't stay attached, if he only acknowledges something good while he has it, then it can't hurt him to lose it. grian is a survivor, yes. but his emotions always mattered more than winning or dying ever did.
grian will scratch and claw, will fight for an alliance with everything he has - but as soon as that alliance is gone? well, there's nothing left to fight for, is there?
(he pretends there's nothing left, needs to convince himself that it all means nothing now, because he's afraid of what he would feel if he let himself admit that there are some things that continue to matter even after they're gone.)
nosy neighbors my beloveds <3
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i'm still not over them
This took me 16 hours!!!
This might be the best thing I’ve ever drawn
If the bad boys have a million fans, I'm one of them
If the bad boys have one fan, I'm that fan
If the bad boys have no fans, I'm dead
Sketchs under cut
they'll take your lunch money if you're not careful