What should I call this, episode 18? Live show 4? Anyway, itās the results from last night, so lots of filler, no real thriller, and Iām thinking that I should probably combine live weekends going forward because itās a lot, man, itās a lotttt, and itās all connected. Anyway, @newleafover, @justlarried, etc. etc., and Iām sweaty from all the hot tamales I ate earlier, so letās just get to it, the high point on any Sunday night, my drunken random thoughts!
I wonder if Simon'll be on the coke tonight like he was last night because that was kinda fun.
Louisās 1960s-era apres ski/British Olympic team AU realness has powered me through pretty much most of today (shout out to @thewindmakesnicewaves for making me really appreciate his hair; props to @2tiedships2.tumblr.com, for the gif):
For at least three years now, Iāve only had two thoughts when it comes to Little Mix, mainly, they should be WAY bigger in the US than they are, and who the fuck hates them so much that they dress them like this (Iām all for fashion, and Iām all for kitschy camp ugly fashion, but this feels like something Heidi would MURDER you for on Project Runway, I can literally hear her Germenglish chirp in my head, āsadā):
Thereās a bunch of dramatic, drawn-out bullshit because all of this is obviously rigged, but it boils down to Janice going home immediately (because: racism), and then a tacky, dystopian, end-of-society-as-we-know-it graphic about the vote being reopened for the bottom bunch.
Shout out to that feeling when youāve realized Louis is your new king, so you can say insult the old king (āWell, welcome, youāre on the X Factor, and you're head judgeā) because heās so coked out of his mind that he has no idea where he is right now:
Kylie sings while we wait for a showdown that has already been determined (related: Iām surprised sheās still pushing the country album), and I love her horse shirt/white pants and the fact that Dermot barely gives a passing nod to the huge thing that was Kylie + Robbie in the ā90s and how she managed to get not one but two pool tables plus a full bar on stage (me as Dermot, when the crowd only gives a smattering of applause, āCome ONā¦KYLIE!!!!ā):
(And if you think rbb and sbb wouldnāt be knocked out by this spectacle, then you arenāt prepared for the Met Gala, let me show you the door right now, this is ā90s-level Britney.)
We come back to the "shockingā news that Bella is the immediate save based on public votes (Louisās face vs. Simonās face, lmaoooooo); Louis yelling good luck to Molly across the stage while heās hugging Brendan when theyāre down to the final handful is my new religion, breathtaking, this is the hunger games:
Weāre left with the choir and Brendan, and god bless Dermot for noticing that Louisās in full papa bear mode with Brendan, so he just leaves it alone before break (in America, that would not have happened, and I love both Louis and Dermot equally in this moment for the way they protect him).
When you read a fic and a character is āspitting outā his words but you donāt quite buy it, go visit this episode and watch Louis because, āIām absolutely speechless, I donāt think Brendan DESERVES to be here,ā is Websters, the spit in it, Jesus, itās so fucking REAL.
Radiohead for Brendanās sing off is actually a good choice, not only because of the notes but because Louis knows about Simonās boner for acapella openers (he pointed it out last episode), geddit, sbb, and I love how fucking here for this performance Louis is, the full scronch, arms raised, standing O during the final bits, god, to have his support must be something else, the words he's pouring in to Brendanās ears at the end when he hugs him, can you even imagine????
The explanation of what a deadlock is means that that's what weāre gonna get...thanks, editorial team!
Simonās a terrible actor, and Iām actually insulted by watching him pretend to deliberate that a fucking CHOIR is going to win this, so I fully support Louis yelling at him off mic. It boils down to Ayda, and because we know a deadlock is coming, thatās what happens.
This entire thing takes me back to Spain, and Liam and Louis and Nile talking about these guysā LIVES being affected by this bullshit, and you can see it in Louisās face (itās not about him, not at all, so Iām not here for people trying to say itās sabotage on Louis; he wouldnāt think so either):
The choir loses because, yes, of course, they do, so while Robbieās deadpanning his, āIt was a genuine shock, I couldnāt see it coming, Iām gonna miss my scousers,ā Louisās off on the side, giving all the love in the world to someone being mind-fucked on national TV:
We leave this episode with a real-life trick-or-treat preview for next week: James Arthur (ugh) and Liam Payne (FUCK YES)
