Good bye Palma!
My time in Palma has finally come to an end. It has been such a refreshing, empowering and unique experience. I have gone through peaks of feeling absolutely amazing, to troughs of feeling completely lost. All the while I have maintained a certain level of confidence and belief in myself, which has been such a great personal development.
I was on such a life high when I first arrived, I was loosing weight, exercising everyday and really giving myself the time and love that I needed. Studying hard, and the associated stress, and the fears of failure definitely altered my priorities. I exercised less, still ate pretty well, but had let a few things slip, inevitably leading to a little weight gain and that feeling that you have let yourself down. I find it baffling sitting here at the airport that this is what I choose to focus on…the mildly negative result that has come from me studying. I’m making a conscious effort to focus on how much I dedicated myself to my studies. I am proud that I achieved 100 percent in my theory and 99 percent in my prac, resulting in me finishing top of my class. Something that I didn’t think was possible, but none the less wanted.
I wish sometimes that I wouldn’t be so hard on myself, about my weight, about how I look, about the person I am. Sometimes it’s a little all encompassing and negative. This firmness towards myself does keep me present though, it reminds me that I have made mistakes in many shapes and forms throughout my life so far, and those mistakes are building a better me.
I am letting go of some of the unrealistic pressures I put on myself, adjusting my focus on to what makes me a better person and having a little trust in the person I am and the life I am creating for myself. The strengths I find in myself each day, the happiness, laughter and joy I surround myself in. It has been such an amazing experience here in Palma and I feel like I have enriched my soul with so much love and dedication that I will never forget this time, this moment and this place.
