#lifewiththem

My partners little has gone ‘missing’. My partner, Bruce, describes like Flash has locked himself in his castle and doesn’t want to come out and has big sound proof headphones on. Flash is his everyday headmate. Flash is always around. He pops in and out though out the day and I didn’t realize how much I had noticed and grown to like him. Now he’s quiet and the rest of his head mates are isolated too. I wish I could understand more what was going on in there. What causes them to all go quiet, how to interact with them. I don’t want to pry because I respect the individuality of each headmate. This is all so new to me. They have become my friends... slowly. I would call and check or text a friend to check on them. I just don’t know them well. My interactions with most of them are through B. I don’t know how to communicate with them without stepping on Bruce’s toes. Flash is the only one I have regular interactions with. I am worried about him.

I struggle with knowing how to support the system. I struggle with knowing what questions to ask because it’s hard for me to empathize with a whole person just being absent from my own head.

There is no guidebook for dating with mental health differences. My ADHD/RSD/OCD/GAD/SAD/Aspie self struggles with understanding our own brain.

I started this blog because I feel alone trying to understand. I started this to process the differences that dating someone with DID brings about.

I want to do something for little Flash. I love him. He’s my little buddy. I am trying not to feel heartbroken that he feels so sad he has to lock himself away.