#lifesong

There are moments that the words don’t reach, there is suffering too terrible to name. You hold your child as tight as you can, and push away the unimaginable. 

Anise stared out at the falling rain in the twilight. A snippet of a tune hummed through her mind as the caravan finally slowed. “We’ll rest here for now.” The driver called out to the passengers, “Don’t want to overdo it the night after the Purge, amirite?” He halfheartedly chuckled into the awkward silence of the group as they settled in for the night. The Rover curled up next to her husband for warmth and comfort, and the feelings of the meet washed over her in a mix of music and emotion. Father Ascended’s horrific murder at the hands of the Paladin… Read about the 'ideous murder, Profane, religious murder! The poor old bishop, What a shock! Seen walkin' wiv 'is daughter, A moment prior to slaughter! The shepherd tendin' to 'is flock!

Her own baptism into the Kings Court, and the Muses of Flesh and Bone… How ‘bout a dance, what do you think? I’ve got some moves that I’d love to show ya. Let’s find a spark, and dance the night away.

Advent’s baptism into the Sainthood of Ashes… So let your light so shine before men, let your light so shine. So that they might know some kindness again. We all need help to feel fine…. ‘Let’s have some wine!’

The election of the Triumvirate… He's very attractive in the North, the Yorkers like his chances. ‘He's not very forthcoming on any particular stances’

The talent show… Join us! Leave your fields to flower. Join us! Leave your cheese to sour. Join us, Come and waste an hour or two, Doo-dle-ee-do

The Purge… City on fire! Rats in the streets, And the lunatics yelling at the moon! It’s the end of the world! Yes!

The battle against the Paladin… Track down this murderer he must be found! Track down this murderer he must be found! Hunt out this animal, who runs to ground! Too long he's preyed on us, but now we know, the phantom of the opera is here deep down inside! 

Natalie and Pisces lying dead in the road together… Dyin’ ain’t so bad. Not if we both go together. Only when one’s left behind does it get sad.

So… Much… Loss… Melpomene, Natalie, Pisces, Amelie, Cirice, Pigeon… More, if the Sainthood hadn’t been there to bring them back. Probably more that Anise wasn’t even aware of still. 

The Beat continued its skipping- not settling on one specific song for quite some time. As the emotions and memories flowed, the music shifted accordingly. From the joyful, to the morose, to the angry, and defeated. Until finally, the song settled. The Beat was there to remind her… why. What did the Kings and Queens of the past wish to spread to the world? Anise closed her eyes to begin her slumber as the message rang out in her mind, dampening the sounds of the rain. Let there be life, and a song for me. You will be burned

But you will see the sun

You will bear blisters

On your feet as you run

Before you are done

Let there be life

Oh, let there be life

And a song for me

Let me feel the touch

And swear you won't resist

You will be cheated

But you will be kissed

Let nothing be missed

I say you'll exist

And let there be life

And a song for me

There will be no more confusing yourself

No refusing yourself

No more delays

There’s only the call to respond to

Task to get on to

The work of your days

So let it begin

And one day, let it end

Let it fall to pieces

And what’s meant to will mend

With life to lend

And days to spend

Jasper was your best friend.

Agnes, it's your chance for life

Let there be life

Let there be life

Let there be life

Take back your life

all of my life songs:

Don’t remind me of the quickness of time. I keep the note glued to the inside of my eyes. It’s impossible to forget it. The euphoria. St. Valentine, his martyrdom and reminder of love creeps onto the calendar just as the pressure of the winter begins to leave marks on you. The typical celebration of Valentine’s Day , or atleast how I have perceived it over the years, is a bit lacking in the realm of individualism and creativity. I never felt comfortable standing in line with a dozen roses or a box of waxy chocolate. “As many shades of color that exist in the world, so are there expressions of love. “ -Sanbar Guerelli I wanted to try and celebrate the death of St. Valentine in a different manner than I have in the past.  I sat down, after the babes had slipped into their slumber, and wrote this song. I wanted the song to be recorded immediately after I wrote it, and to add things that felt were adding to the song and then let it just be. Let it live as it was in that moment. No laborious process or procedures. Inside of the song you will find mistakes, pitchy notes, bad intonation, but then you will find spirit. SPIRIT.

ONLY FOR LOVE

If I say the wrong words, If I crow like the birds On the wire, It is only for love If I trip on my shoes, teach my skin how to bruise, And crack my teeth, It is only for love. Here in my mountain I drink my own fountain, I think that it’s keeping me sane I see colors I’d never thought possible ever They’re painting the sides of my brain If I light me on fire, turn my hair into wire See me burn, and it’s only for love If I swear out a curse, spin a phrase, sing a verse I will say that it’s only for love I made up my mind, I’m spending my time Waitin’ to see through the rain I’m the air in the middle that dodges the riddle Of how we all grow and decay. If I run up ahead, give the ground what I’m fed I return and it’s only for love If I fall far behind in my search for a sign I will wait for my angel of love. I shatter and crumble get broken and humbled Then turn into pockets of blood Then I’ll tear through the bubble that carries my struggle And end up right where I was. IF I float to a dream, to a world only seen By a man who is searching for love. St. Valentine’s Day 2017 Joshua Fred James