#levihan fluff

The door jingled as they entered, welcomed by the cheerful chatter and the clink of cups. The warmth of the café enveloped them instantly. It was crowded, but not enough to stop Hange from spotting their old table near the window.

Without hesitation, they started weaving through the maze of chairs and patrons. “I call dibs on the table!”

“Wait, there are still cups on it-” Levi tried to protest.

But Hange was already sliding into the booth, grinning as they sat down. “It’s the same table, Levi. We have to sit here.”

Levi frowned, glancing at the mess of empty cups and stained napkins left by the previous customers. “Really? Looks like it’s been hit by a tornado.”

“Don’t be such a grump.” Hange grinned, shoving their paper bags under the table. “Come on, it’s the perfect spot. It’s nostalgic!”

Levi sighed, but despite his grumbling, he sat down on the chair across from them.

“Nostalgic my ass.”

Levi got rid of his coat and scarf, folding them in a neat pile beside Hange.

His eye twitched as he looked at the scattered cups, their contents long gone but the mess still there. He let out a heavy sigh and immediately started to gather the dirty cups, sliding them to the side.

“Levi, seriously? It’s not like anyone cares,” Hange said, watching him with an amused grin as he stacked the cups into a pile.

“Well, I care,” he muttered, flicking a napkin out of the way. He wrinkled his nose. “It’s disgusting.”

Hange leaned back in their seat, watching the subtle twitch of Levi’s fingers as he rearranged everything to his liking. “You’re the only person I know who would willingly clean up after strangers in a café.”

“I’m not cleaning,” he grumbled. “Just... organizing.”

Before he could finish, the waitress arrived, smiling brightly as she swept the mess away effortlessly. “I’ll get these for you,” she said, flashing them a warm look.

Levi barely glanced up, his face already in its signature scowl. “Fucking finally,” he groaned under his breath.

The waitress wiped the table down, handing them menus with a cheerful “Here you go!” before turning to leave.

Hange chuckled. “You’re such a clean freak, you know.”

“Obviously not, since I live with a slob,” Levi muttered. “Just didn’t want to sit at a garbage dump.”

Hange tugged off their ridiculous hat, letting out a satisfied sigh. But when they ran a hand through their hair, Levi couldn't help but snort.

“Now your hair looks even worse than your hat,” he muttered, leaning back in his seat.

Hange chuckled. “Hey, no need to be so mean.”

Levi just clicked his tongue in response, casting an unimpressed glance at the wild mass of hair.

Hange raised an eyebrow. “What, you don’t think it’s cute?”

Levi didn’t answer, but he stood abruptly, pushing his chair back with a scrape. Unexpectedly, he leaned over the table, reaching for their hair. With soft, careful gestures, he began to smooth out the tangles, his fingers gently carding through the tousled locks.

Hange blinked in surprise at the unusual display, but as Levi’s focused expression softened, a real smile spread across their face -genuine and bright, something that lit up their eyes.

Levi’s nose and cheeks were flushed, his ears red from the cold -though Hange couldn’t help but hope the icy weather was not the only cause. They felt a wave of affection surge through them, their heart beating a little faster as they watched him.

“You’re cute, you know that?” Hange said softly, barely a whisper, as they let their smile widen.

Levi, completely unaware of the adoration in their gaze, mumbled something that sounded like a protest but didn’t pull away.

Just as he tucked a strand of hair behind Hange’s ear, the waitress came back to their table with a bright smile.

 “Well, aren’t you two the cutest lovebirds,” she said, teasing, as she set a small notepad down the table.

Hange giggled at the nickname.

“Lovebirds? How sweet!” they cooed, their face lighting up.

Levi, on the other hand, was clearly annoyed.

“Lovebirds? What the hell?” He grumbled under his breath. “What are we, spotty teens?”

“Oh, sorry, I didn’t mea-,” the waitress started.

Hange kicked Levi’s ankle under the table and smiled brightly at the waitress. “Don’t mind Mr. Grumpy Pants,” they said with a chuckle. “He's a decent little dude once you get to know him.”

Levi let out an exaggerated sigh, but Hange could see the faintest hint of a smile tugging at his lips.

The waitress scribbled down their orders. “I’ll be right back with your drinks.”

As she turned and walked away, Hange and Levi locked eyes, reaching out over the table to intertwine their fingers.

It seemed it had been ages since their first date. Yet, in this very moment, in this very place, everything just felt the same as it had that day.

The golden warmth of the fall afternoon sun bathed the café in a welcoming atmosphere. Outside, the air was crisp, with a faint chill that only seemed to make the cozy place more enjoyable.

Levi had been sitting at a small table by the window for a while now, his expression unreadable, but his gaze soft as he stared outside.

Along the street, beeches and pin oaks were shedding their leaves, fiery reds, oranges, and yellows drifting down in the cold wind to the sidewalk below. A few passers-by, wrapped in their jackets, occasionally paused to admire the beautiful display of fall colors. Levi’s eyes briefly lingered on them in the same detached way he observed everything around him.

Only a few customers were scattered throughout the quiet café. The smell of freshly brewed coffee and warm pastries wafted to him from time to time.

Levi looked effortlessly handsome, in his simple but elegant outfit, his well-cut jacket fitting him just right.

He glanced at his watch for the third time since he arrived and sighed.

He leaned back in his seat and grabbed the menu, his gaze momentarily shifting to the words printed on it. He wasn’t hungry, not really, but the menu offered a distraction while he waited.

As he scanned the list, he remained blissfully unaware of the admiring glances exchanged between the waitress and the cashier girl, both of them casting furtive looks at him from behind the counter.

The café’s door swung open in a burst. Levi jolted in his seat, startled by the sudden ringing of the bell, and his eyes immediately shot up from the menu.

Hange.

A gust of cold air followed them as they stepped in with sparkling energy. A whirlwind.

Their messy hair fluffed by the wind and a wide smile on their lively face, they bounced into the café and scanned the room with excitement.

The waitress and cashier exchanged a quick, amused glance before giggling softly, their eyes trailing over Hange’s disheveled state.

Levi, however, frowned as he watched them, his eyes narrowing at the sight of Hange’s hair sticking out in every direction.

As Hange spotted Levi at the table and waved at him, their smile widening, the girls’ mouths dropped open in surprise.

Their eyes flicked between the two of them, slowly realizing that this was the person Levi had been waiting for. It hit them both at once, their expressions shifting from curiosity to astonishment as they witnessed the connection between Levi, who seemed so quiet and composed, and the exuberant person now making their way toward him.

Hange almost tripped over their own feet as they made their way to Levi’s table, narrowly catching themself before they stumbled. They plopped down dramatically into the seat across from him, speaking loudly as though the entire café needed to hear.

"Sorry I’m late! The wind’s insane today," Hange said in an animated tone.

Levi didn’t reply immediately, but a hint of disapproval flickered in his eyes as he took in their unkempt state, spotting leaves stuck in their wild hair, a tangled mess of autumn colors.

Completely oblivious to their own disarray -and to Levi’s softening gaze- Hange reached into their pocket, pulling out a heart-shaped golden leaf and holding it out to Levi with a grin.

“For you!”

Levi took the leaf, his expression neutral.

“You’re a mess,” he muttered, “and you’re late.”

"So sorry to be late but those leaves are so pretty! I had to find the perfect one for you! You see, the heart shape? This is basically nature’s way of blessing our date.”

Levi looked down at the leaf in his hand, then back up at Hange, his lips twitching ever so slightly as if he held back a smile.

The waitress joined them as he thanked Hange for their unusual gift.

Hange leaned forward to make their order. “I’ll have the pumpkin chai latte, with extra sugar and extra whipped cream, and, oh! Do you have any sprinkles?”

They looked at the waitress with wide, sparkling eyes.

Levi didn’t even blink as he ordered, “Black tea. No sugar.”

Hange raised an eyebrow. “Seriously? You're just gonna drink... sadness in a cup?”

Levi glanced at them, trying his best to suppress the slight irritation creeping into his voice. “Says the one ordering dessert instead of coffee.”

“Oh, come on! It's fall! It’s a vibe!" Hange insisted, grinning. "What’s better in life than whipped cream and sprinkles?”

Levi scoffed, shaking his head. “Not getting diabetes every time you drink coffee?”

“Just let me enjoy my dose of comfort while you sip your bland, depressing beverage,” Hange teased.

Their drinks arrived shortly and Hange started to tell one of their passionate stories, waving their arms dramatically. “Okay, so the other day I was reading this book about quantum physics and-”

Levi listened quietly, drinking in their animated features as he took a careful sip of his hot tea.

“-it’s fascinating!” Hange continued, oblivious to his lingering gaze. “So, what if we could shift our density to one similar to gas and phase through walls?”

Levi rolled his eyes. ”Who the hell would care about something that useless?”

Hange grinned widely. “Well, I find it fascinating. And fun! What about you, huh? What’s your idea of fun?”

“I don’t know… Cleaning, maybe…”

Hange chuckled, but before they could reply, Levi reached across the table, his fingers brushing through their tousled hair. “Got a leaf in your hair,” he whispered.

He gently pulled the golden leaf from the mess of hair, his touch surprisingly delicate, as though he had done this a hundred times before.

Hange froze, blinking up at him, caught off guard by the sudden attention. Their heartbeat quickened. He had never been so close to them, and this all felt somewhat… intimate.

Totally unaware of the effect his small gesture had, Levi sat back to sip his tea.

A blush crept up their neck, but before overthinking Levi’s gesture, they cleared their throat and went back to their story, gesturing wildly as if nothing had happened.

“So, yeah, imagine if we could just phase through walls! The possibilities would be endless!”

Eager to return to their usual chatter, Hange went on blabbering about physics with animated gestures until their hand, in the middle of their rambling, swept across the table, knocking their pumpkin chai latte off.

The drink toppled over, splashing onto the table and spilling across Hange’s sleeve.

“Oh, crap!” Hange grabbed a napkin and immediately started scrambling to clean up the mess, though all they were really doing was spreading the stain.

Levi sighed, pushing his tea aside, then reached into his pocket for his neatly folded handkerchief. Without a word, he slid it across the table toward them.

Hange looked at the handkerchief before meeting Levi’s eyes with a sheepish grin.

“Oh, I’m so sorry, Levi, I swear I’m not usually this clumsy-"

Clearly not convinced, Levi raised an eyebrow.

“And I don't want to ruin your handkerchief.”

“Don’t bother. You’ll probably spill something else on it anyway,” he deadpanned.

Hange chuckled nervously. "Fair enough… I’ll wash it and return it, of course."

Levi leaned back in his chair as Hange wiped their sleeve, and his gaze briefly drifted out of the window, his fingers tracing lightly the rim of his cup. He thought of Erwin, who had been so sure he would get along with Hange.

"Seriously, Levi," Erwin had said a week ago, when Levi hesitated, "I can tell you two are going to hit it off. Just say yes to the invite. You’ll be glad you did."

Levi had been annoyed by the unsolicited advice at the time, but now, as he looked at Hange across from him, he told himself that maybe… Well, maybe Erwin had been right.

His hand brushed against Hange’s briefly as they both reached for the napkins at the same time. A small spark of warmth radiated from the touch.

He glanced over at Hange, still too caught up in cleaning the last traces of whipped cream from their earlier mishap. Levi would probably never admit it aloud, but Erwin was right. He was glad he had said yes.

The conversation resumed, Hange trying to act like they weren't mortified over the spill.

When the waitress returned to clean the table, she winked at the cashier girl who stood by the counter, both of them exchanging a knowing look before focusing on their task.

They had noticed the soft way Levi and Hange’s eyes lingered on each other, the small, unspoken moments that they weren’t quite aware of -the way Levi’s hand brushed Hange’s, how Hange’s smile widened when their eyes met.

It was obvious that something was shifting between the two.

The waitress quickly cleared the last of the napkins and mugs, trying to remain professional, but a small, amused smile tugged at the corners of her lips.

When she reached the counter, the cashier girl leaned over, still watching the couple from afar. “Something’s going on, huh?” she murmured.

The waitress shook her head with a chuckle. “They don’t even know it yet.”

Hange pushed their chair back abruptly, their usual whirlwind energy somewhat coming back. “Let’s go for a walk,” they proposed, tugging at their coat. “I know a park nearby.”

“Ok,” he muttered, rising to go and pay the check.

Levi soon reached the counter and handed over the cash, his eyes drifting toward Hange as the cashier counted out his change. They were near the door, fumbling with their scarf as it caught awkwardly in their coat. However, their smile, bright and unbothered, lit up their face.

He turned away, walking a few paces to the side to slip his wallet back into his pocket.

His fingers brushed the soft edges of the leaf Hange had given him earlier. The absurdity of it -a heart-shaped leaf, of all things, really?- should have annoyed him. But instead, he felt an unfamiliar warmth bloom in his chest.

“They’re cute together,” the cashier whispered as he put on his gloves.

“Definitely mismatched,” the waitress murmured, lowering her voice. “But, somehow, it works. He’s all gruff and serious and handsome; and they’re... well...”

Levi caught enough of their comments to make his brow twitch.

The waitress smirked. “Maybe he has a thing for chaos.”

“The way he’s watching them?” the cashier continued,”Bet he doesn’t even realize he’s totally smitten.”

The word made Levi’s jaw tighten. He wrapped his scarf around his neck and turned abruptly toward the door.

He muttered something under his breath as he walked across the café, his ears burning faintly.

Hange had finally managed to get their coat on and grinned up at him, oblivious to the way he was still recovering from the girls’ words.

“All set?” they asked cheerfully, entirely unaware of his internal turmoil.

“Yeah. Let’s go.”

Levi pushed the door open for them, the sound of the two girls’ muffled giggles following them as they stepped outside.

⋆⁺₊❅.

The brisk air was refreshing. As soon as they entered the quiet park, Hange veered off the path, scanning the ground. They crouched to pick up a golden leaf, then another, holding them up to study their shape and texture.

Levi watched them from a step behind, his hands shoved deep into his pockets. The cold wind didn’t bother him when a faint warmth crept up his neck as he observed their overwhelming, almost childish enthusiasm. It was chaotic, messy, yet oddly endearing.

They reached a small pond and Hange stopped, gazing at their reflection in the water with an unusual frown.

“I’m terrible at this,” they said suddenly, breaking the silence. “Dating, I mean. I’m... too much. People don’t usually stick around.”

Levi stopped beside them, glancing at their solemn expression before speaking in a gentle tone. “Maybe you just haven’t met someone who can handle it.”

Hange’s head turned toward him.

They locked eyes and silence hung in the air between them for a while.

Then, a mischievous smile curled on their lips. “Handle it, huh? Are you volunteering for the job?”

Their eyelashes fluttered playfully.

Levi rolled his eyes, but his faint smirk betrayed him. “Tch. Don’t read too much into it.”

They continued walking along the park path, the autumn leaves crunching softly under their feet. Hange slowed every so often to examine a particular leaf or to show him the different species of trees, rambling enthusiastically about them.

Levi followed silently, his hands tucked into his pockets, his gaze never leaving Hange.

They passed a vendor selling small trinkets and plush toys. Among them, a chubby titan plush caught Hange’s eye, and they froze.

“Levi!” they gasped, pointing at it with childlike excitement. “Look at this cutie! I need it.”

“A plushie, really? What are you, five?” Levi deadpanned

He glanced at the stuffed toy. Of course, it was ridiculously huge. However, he thought, he hadn’t brought flowers to his date after all. So, he couldn’t do otherwise than oblige now, could he?

When he handed the plush to a beaming Hange, they hugged it like it was the most precious treasure in the world.

“This will go perfectly with my collection!” Hange exclaimed.

Levi raised an eyebrow. “Collection of what? Ugly monsters?”

“Hey! It’s cute,” they protested, holding the plush protectively. “And you got it for me, which makes it extra special.”

Levi scoffed but glanced away, embarrassed by the warmth creeping up his cheeks.

He cleared his throat before speaking again. “We should go, it’s getting dark out here.”

They crossed the park at a leisurely pace.

“You know, when I told Eyebrows I was asking you out, he gave me this weird smirk, like he’d predicted it or something,” Hange blurted out after a while.

Levi side-eyed them, hands fidgeting in his pockets. “Sounds like him.”

“Actually, he told me, ‘Levi would enjoy your company more than he lets on.’ I think he oversold it.”

Levi chuckled.

“Did he bribe you to say yes?” Hange asked.

“All he said was that you were tolerable,” Levi replied with a smirk, his tone deadpan. “He left out the part where you’d try to drown the table in chai latte.”

“So he did scheme!” Hange exclaimed. “I knew it! Not that I’m complaining though…”

Levi glanced sideways at them again, noticing the faint flush on their cheeks.

They had reached the edge of the park when Hange stopped suddenly at the corner where they had to part ways.

“Thanks for walking me,” Hange said. “I’m this way.”

They gestured toward their street, their hand lingering mid-air as if unsure whether to wave or stay still.

Levi shifted his weight, smoothing down the golden leaf still tucked in his pocket.

 “You’d probably have tripped and stumbled in the mud otherwise.”

Hange laughed, their voice warm. “Sounds like something I could do, yeah.”

The street felt quiet for a moment. Hange looked at Levi, their usual confidence shifting into something hesitant, almost shy.

“Well…” They tilted their head, a small, nervous smile forming.

Before Levi could think it through, his hand moved, reaching out to brush a stray strand of hair away from their forehead. The gesture was brief but tender, catching Hange off guard. Their eyes widened slightly, their cheeks warming as they stood frozen for a second.

Levi pulled his hand back, his expression unreadable except for the faintest hint of something soft in his gaze. “Your hair’s a fucking mess, Four-Eyes.”

The tension just vanished and they both laughed softly.

As Levi was about to turn to leave, Hange surprised him, leaning in and brushing the lightest, most hesitant kiss against his cheek.

“Thanks for today,” they said quietly, stepping back before Levi could reply.

Levi stared at them, momentarily at a loss for words.

His face burned, whether from the cold or something else entirely, he couldn’t say.

“Just don’t be late next time,” he replied, walking away before Hange could see the faint smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

Hange watched him go before turning and heading home, their smile never fading.

Levi and Hange were lost in their own small world at the corner table, the humming of conversations and the occasional clink of porcelain blurred in the background. Steam curled up from their drinks, warming their cold hands and flushing their cheeks.

Hange took a generous sip of their overly sweet concoction and sighed contentedly.

“This really takes me back,” they said, their voice tinged with nostalgia. “It feels like nothing’s changed here.”

Levi hummed quietly in agreement, his black tea cooling in front of him. His eyes drifted to Hange’s hand resting on the table, fingers drumming absently against the wood. Without thinking, his own hand shifted closer, brushing against theirs in a fleeting touch.

Hange glanced up, surprised by the uncharacteristic gesture, but Levi kept his gaze fixed on his cup. “I still have it, you know,” he confessed, his voice low, almost reluctant.

“Have what?” Hange tilted their head, their curiosity piqued.

“The leaf,” Levi said simply, his thumb lightly grazing over Hange’s knuckles now. “The one you gave me that day. Pressed it in a book.” He paused, feeling the heat rise to his face. “Still there.”

Hange blinked, their expression softening into something unmistakably tender. “You’re kidding.”

“Do I look like I’m joking?” Levi grumbled, finally meeting their gaze.

Hange’s face broke into a radiant smile, one that made Levi’s chest tighten in that familiar, inexplicable way. “Levi Ackerman, you always surprise me,” they teased.

“Tch. Don’t get used to it,” he deadpanned. However, he didn’t pull his hand away, his thumb slightly brushing their ring instead.

Hange hesitated, their fingers curling around the edge of their mug as they shifted slightly in their seat. Their eyes flickered between Levi’s face and the steam rising from their drink before finally settling on the view outside the window..

“That first date. I still think about it often.”

Levi watched them quietly, his brow furrowing slightly at their uncharacteristic hesitation. “You do?” he asked softly, as though he wasn’t sure if he should press.

Hange nodded, their gaze dropping for a moment before they bit their lip, a faint smile playing at the corners of their mouth.

“Yeah. Especially…” Their voice trailed off as they glanced again toward the window to watch the soft snow falling outside. “The plushie you got me.”

Levi’s lips tugged upward as he thought about the ugly stuffed toy sitting in Hange’s office. “Don’t know why you’ve kept that thing all this time.”

“It’s sentimental,” they add in a whisper. “You got it for me and I love it.”

They fell silent, the weight of their words hanging in the air for a while.

Levi gently squeezed their hand and their eyes met.

Then suddenly, as though deciding something, Hange leaned down, fumbling among the paper bags resting by their feet. They picked up the red one, their fingers tightening on the handles as they placed it on the table in front of Levi.

He blinked at the bag, then at Hange, who was now watching him with a nervous expression.

“What’s this?” he asked, narrowing his eyes slightly.

“I was going to wait until Christmas,” Hange began quickly, their words tumbling over one another. “But this… this just feels like the right moment.”

Levi raised a skeptical eyebrow but pulled the bag toward him, carefully lifting out the contents. His movements stilled when he realized what it was: a soft, absurdly detailed titan onesie.

For a moment, Levi said nothing, simply staring at the tiny outfit in his hands. His thumb brushed over the fabric, lingering on the little details -the ridiculous hood, the tiny mittens. Then his eyes flicked up to meet Hange’s.

Their heart pounded as they studied his face for any reaction, their own nerves fraying with each passing second. “It’s, uh, a little… symbolic,” they started, biting their lip again.

His lips parted slightly, and for a fleeting second, Hange swore they saw a flicker of emotion in his usually composed expression. 

He cleared his throat.

“You… You’re serious?” he asked, almost breathless.

Hange simply nodded, their nervous smile giving way to something warmer, more certain.

Levi’s gaze dropped back to the onesie in his hands. He clicked his tongue, but the corners of his mouth turned upward, the faintest hint of a smile breaking through.

“A titan onesie. Of course you had to make it weird, Four-Eyes.”

Hange laughed, their shoulders relaxing as relief and joy washed over them. “Would you expect anything less from me?”

Levi didn’t answer, but smiled instead, his eyes still on the onesie as his fingers brushed over it again, this time more gently.

The room was quiet, save for the soft ticking of the clock on the bedside table. The flickering glow of the street lights peeked through a crack in the curtain, painting patterns and shadows on the walls.

Levi lay behind Hange, his arm draped protectively over their side. They were sound asleep, their breathing slow and even, their hair a messy halo over the pillow.

He could feel the gentle rise and fall of their chest beneath his arm, a steady rhythm that usually lulled him to sleep.

But tonight Levi’s eyes remained open, his gaze fixed on the ceiling. His mind raced with a muddle of thoughts he couldn’t quite organize.

A dad. He was going to be a dad.

The thought alone sent an odd mix of feelings coursing through him -anticipation, fear, uncertainty. What the hell did he know about being a father? Could he even do this?

His chest tightened, but before the doubts could spiral further, he shifted closer to Hange, burying his nose in the crook of their neck. The faint earthy scent of their skin and the warmth of their body slowly shushed his anxious thoughts.

His hand brushed gently over their belly. He let out a quiet breath, and started to whisper in the dark as if the baby could somehow hear him.

“Oi, brat. Hope you get the color of their eyes. Or their brains. Or maybe their enthusiasm, I don’t fucking know…. Whatever, you’ll be amazing like them anyway.” He chuckled. “Don’t tell them or Four-Eyes will never let me hear the end of it.”

He pressed a kiss to the back of Hange’s neck, soft and lingering.

“Don’t know how that works but I’ll do my best. We’ll do our best. And I’ll love you just as much as I love them. I promise.”

As he kissed their warm skin again, Hange stirred faintly, letting out a quiet sigh before settling back into sleep. Levi closed his eyes, letting their presence soothe him.

For now, he would let the worry go.

For now, he would just hold them and cherish this moment.

All graphics by me

🎀❤️ REBLOGS APPRECIATED ❤️🎀

The titan plushie & onesie are a reference to THIS ADORABLE FANART

“If my body had a mind of its own-”

“It doesn't? That explains it”

Levi turned his head to look towards the person who laid down by him, teasingly laying a finger to their temple before he looked away once more “guess it could be all empty” they groaned aloud as they laid down by him. Surely, their body was aching. “That's not what I mean, and you know it” the smile on their face brought him much joy, perhaps his heart was even singing right now? Doing somersaults somewhere in there, maybe.

“No? Then what?” A small smile rested on the short man's face as Hange pushed back up to face him, hanging over him. The sun shone through their hair, making them look more ethereal than usual. A halo around their head fit them well. His angel, his Hange.

“I mean, if my belly could speak right now, It would tell me: get off of the ground and find some grub to eat! I'm empty!” They delivered the act with much joy and laughter. Causing the world to feel as good and beautiful as the caramel colour of their frizzy hair in the sun.

“And if my back could speak, it would tell me: lay back down! He can hear you no matter, let me rest! And my arms would chime in the same”

“hm” he lifted his hand up towards them, stopping himself from pushing their hair back, laying his arm over his face instead. “If my eyes could speak right now” Levi decided to entertain their game. “They would cry out, Spare me, they're too close, and they need a comb”

If his eyes could speak right now, they would rejoyce, speak over one another to get their point across, only to fail in doing so due to their excitement.

*They are the most beautiful thing we've ever seen, never have the sun kissed someone more perfect than them*

“Huh, if my eyes could speak…” it seemed their eyes didn't have much to say, on behalf maybe, of their glasses. Dirty glasses in need of cleaning, the man just noticed. “If my eye could speak, it would say.. Show me more!” Their laughter died down, instead a solemn expression took its place. “Show me more, in spite of the world we walk on, in spite of the pain we've suffered, in spite of our losses… show me more! Show us more! For somewhere out there- something new, and something good… will find us, it will come our way, it's about time.. and this will not Only be new, but more exciting than anything we've ever seen before!” As they spoke, they had turned their gaze towards the sky, as if speaking to the heavens above.

They then quickly turned their attention back to Levi, a wide grin on their face. “Or perhaps it'd Just scream, mourning the loss of it's sibling”

“Dumbass” again he lifted his hand, this time gently smacking Hange's head, earning a joyful squeal.

For a moment their words had resonated with Levi, perhaps it was in fact time for something good to come chasing him, them-

Or perhaps the good was already sitting right by him? Rubbing their forehead while attempting to contain their laughter.

“If-” Hange buckled over, taking a moment to let it all out, an exhausted laughter being blessed upon the ground. “If my heart could speak right now. It would say.. maybe it's not all that bad” they sat up, their glasses in their hands, while wiping their warm tears as they pressed forth.

“I heard what you said” Hange replied, her eyes wide open, outstretched hands waving aimlessly at the air in front of her “I just… why? How? How do I even-”

“He’s been here a while but hasn’t made friends with anyone so far.” the commander caught a glimpse of Hange’s eye roll and sighed in response. “I usually stay out of your businesses, but given the nature of what we do, this intervention is necessary. Levi’s raw talent won’t be of much help if he is not able to trust his squad. Or vice-versa. So I need someone to… break the ice. To make him feel more comfortable with the Survey Corps. Someone to bond with him, so others follow suit”

Hange listened carefully to Erwin’s words. Their leader, as usual, had his eyes on an important goal that the others hadn’t seen yet. 

“I understand that, Erwin. But why ask me?” Hange pointed towards herself as if she were a rotten apple at the market stall. “It’s not like I’m someone he is particularly fond of. Hell, he seems to hate me even more than he hates Mike, and I heard that Mike shoved his head into a pool of sewage once!” 

“He did no such thing.”

“Really?”

“Yes. It was a puddle of muddy water. Anyway, I’m asking you because everyone else is scared of him” 

“But-”

“Just think of it as an experiment. What works? What doesn't work? You’ll find out. And if that doesn’t motivate you, just remember that I’m commander and this is an order.” As soon as the last word left the leader’s lips, he turned on his heel and left the room.

Hange stood there for a good ten minutes, awestruck, pondering over what the hell had just happened. She couldn't deny her curiosity about the new captain. He came from a completely different background but his abilities were unmatched, even by the most experienced soldiers. His nonchalance also had some sort of appeal to her, like a mystery waiting to be solved, and it didn’t hurt that he was so easy on the eyes (although she kept that last part to herself). Still, Erwin’s choice was weird. Hange thought that someone more charismatic and generally likable, such as Petra, would be the most obvious person for the job. Was the commander, again, seeing something ahead that was not yet clear to her? Maybe. Probably. But even if that was not the case, Hange wasn’t one to back down from a challenge.

She took a bite of that nutty fruitcake and it tasted exciting and sweet. Fair enough. She set by the lab desk and started scribbling on a piece of paper. Let’s get this experiment going!

***

The perfect opportunity to set her plan in motion came up a few days later when they gathered in the mess hall after a particularly tiring training session with the new Special Operations Squad. 

Hange’s plan was… peculiar. She knew that to bond with Levi, she needed to find some common ground with him, but the captain was so damn closed! The only interest she knew he had was neatness. She was halfway through creating a plan to make their cleaning duty schedules coincide when it hit her: he apparently also liked poop talk. Seriously, for someone so obsessed with hygiene, that shorty sure talked a lot about excrement.

Hange ripped the previous plan and started to write down her new ideas. Erwin said she could think of this as an experiment, right? Then It was only right to approach the matter with the scientific method:

Observation: Levi is an introspective shorty who grunts at everyone, cleans obsessively, and talks a lot about feces. Hypothesis: A poop joke will create a moment of positive connection with Levi. Experiment: Tell Levi a good poop joke and observe his reaction.

Then, all she had to do was analyze the results and convey her conclusions to Erwin. It was definitely a bet, but one that might just pay off.

So Hange buried herself in research for two days, until she found the perfect joke and the right way to tell it. There was nothing else to do other than wait for the best opportunity to conduct her experiment, and when the soldiers sat at the mess hall to tell stories and relieve the tension from the training, Hange knew that it had arrived.

They sat facing each other through the small corridor, their backs leaning against the table tops behind them. Moblit, Hange, Erwin, Mike, and Nanaba on one bench, Gunther, Eld, Levi, Petra, and Oluo on the other, all drinking from their jugs, except for the new captain, whose chosen poison was tea.

“... and that’s when I found Oluo lying in a pile of trash behind the bar.” The older soldier scowled as Petra concluded her story. “Come on, Oluo. Don’t be so tedious. You did look pretty funny with that banana peel on your toupé”. Most of the Corps laughed audibly, and even Mike and Nanaba let out a giggle at the ridiculous image.

“What about you, captain? Do you have any funny stories for us?” Petra asked, still laughing a bit while wiping the tears that had accumulated in her eyes. She seemed to be making an effort to put Levi at ease with his new squad. Hange made a note to herself to ask Erwin about that later.

“No,” Levi answered dryly. Then, when he noticed the negative change in the young woman’s facial expression, he elaborated “Not many fun stories where I come from.”

“I have one” Hange raised her arm eagerly, breaking the uncomfortable silence, and, for once, her comrades seemed grateful that she decided to say something. “It’s a poop joke”. 

“Ugh,” Oluo said. From the corner of her eye, she saw Erwin giving her an inquisitive look. On her other side, Moblit had… was that fear on his face? Oh, Come on!

“So, a bear and a rabbit are taking a dump in the woods…” Hange started, suppressing the grin that was forcing its way into her lips. She wasn’t the best at telling jokes (always got too excited before the punchline) but she was trying her best this time. She couldn’t let external conditions interfere with the results of the experiment. Her comedic timing needed to be perfect. 

Oluo let out another groan. Was he really disgusted by the mention of feces or was he trying to emulate Levi? He seemed to be doing this a lot these days. Petra elbowed him and smiled at Hange. The rest of the Survey Corps all looked at the squad leader expectantly, some more amused than others, except for Levi, who had his eyes fixed on the teacup he was slowly bringing towards his lips.

“A bear and a rabbit are taking a dump in the woods” Hange started over. “After the bear is done with his business, he turns to the rabbit and says “Hey, Rabbit. Do you have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?" “‘Well, no. I’m quite used to it” Hange put in extra effort in making believable voices for the characters, which drew some laughter across the tables. Levi remained indifferent, taking a long sip of his tea. Hange continued.“‘Good’, the bear says. Then he grabs the rabbit and wipes his ass with him.”

For one instant, the room went silent, except for the sound of liquid spurring out of Levi's partially closed lips. Hange’s vision got blurry as particles of tea covered her lenses. The wetness of her face was uncomfortable, but she was focused on more pressing matters. Who was sitting directly in front of Levi, again? Crap! The scientist raised the glasses to her forehead and slowly looked to her right side. Like a wax figure, Erwin sat with furrowed brows and clenched lips, completely soaked in the brown liquid. One could believe he was a literal statue, had it not been for the painfully slow rhythm of his breathing, moving his chest up and down. Crap, crap, crap, crap!! As she thought this, a thick drop of tea traced a path down his left eyebrow. Yep. She was in deeper shit than that rabbit. 

Hange’s mind started working at a frantic pace, a whirlwind of synapses preparing the deepest, most heartfelt apology ever, but, then, she noticed something everyone else had caught on before her: Levi. Even Erwin seemed unbothered by the tea bath he had just taken, as he looked at the new captain without blinking. 

Levi was staring blindly at the floor beneath him, his hand frozen, holding the teacup directly in front of his face. His nostrils were dilated and the eyebrows were completely furrowed, but also… twitching? The captain’s lips moved as if he were trying to say something, but no words were coming out of his body. 

“Is he ill?” Someone asked. The voice brought Hange back to the present. 

“Captain, are you okay?” Petra asked, concerned, then turned to look at the scientist “Hange, I think you broke Levi.”

“What is happening?” Erwin’s question was not rhetorical. 

Hange analyzed the captain for a moment, the ambiguity on his expression,  all the twitching and trembling.

“I think he is… deciding?”

As if it recognized the cue, Levi’s expression melted into an audible giggle. A giggle! It was hoarse and higher pitched than Hange anticipated, but most of all, it was adorable. The sound disappeared as fast as it had come, leaving everyone agape.

“Tch. That was disgusting, Four Eyes.” Levi said, with a small grin on his lips. “Do you know another one?”

‎***

A few hours later,  Erwin stopped by Hange’s side as they refilled their jugs.

“Interesting technique,” the commander said, without looking at her. 

“I guess you picked the right person for the job” Hange smirked, then suddenly remembered her question about Petra. “By the way, did you assign this mission to anyone else?”

“No, just to you. How did you know that that would work?”

“Science” Hange winked. Erwin let out an amused puff of air through his nose, then narrowed his eyes. “Was this also part of your plan?” the commander signaled at the brown stain on his shirt.

“Of course not. But I wish it was. That was genius!” The scientist laughed loudly, and the commander himself giggled. 

“Fair enough” Erwin responded, a light smirk still on his lips. “On a completely unrelated note, I’m assigning your squad to the toilet cleaning task for the rest of the month”

“Oh, come on! I was just following your orders” Hange pleaded, but the commander remained silent. “Okay, fine. It was worth it, though.” The scientist said as she walked back to her table. 

“Ok, my turn! How did it go?…Oh yeah: Up to my mouth, down through my gums, look out stomach, here it comes!”

Hange taps the shot glass of tequila down on the bar then brings it to their lips to gulp down. Their face contorts as they grab a lime to suck on.

“Wahhh! That’s some strong stuff! You ladies sure know how to show someone a good time!”

The older women cackle and Levi crosses his arms.

Hange looks at him and slides a shot over his way. “Come on…are you gonna be a stick-in-the-mud this whole night?”

He scowls. “Yes.”

“Take a shot with me!”

“No.”

Hange rolls their eyes. “Fine..I guess I’ll just have to drink for the both of us.”

Tap. Gulp.

Levi watches as Hange sucks on another lime. “Remind me why I agreed to go on this roadtrip with you?”

“Because I needed someone to experience the open road with me. To be my adventure companion..” Hange puts an arm around Levi. “..and I needed a car.” They laugh.

“You mean the car that is currently being towed to the only auto repair shop in this backwards-ass town?”

They slam their elbow on the bar and point ridiculously close to his face. “That’s the one!”

Levi had never really been out of the city he’d been born and raised in. But being on this road trip with Hange taught him that there was a lot of NOTHING in between the two coasts: just small towns, corn fields, and cows.

Levi looks around at the dive bar strangely called, “Hootenannies”. It seemed to be the only bar in town and was the only place open at this time of night. When they walked in, every eye was on them; Levi could tell that this was the kind of town where outsiders were instantly noticed, especially outsiders that looked like them.

The tattoos all over their arms, their ripped t-shirts and combat boots. They definitely stood out.

Most of the patrons were just old drunks who didn’t care who they drank with, but some of the others…

…Levi could tell they did not want them there, and he was on alert.

Hange, on the other hand, was having the time of their lives.

“So..why is this drink called, ‘The Shotgun Wedding’?”

The woman sitting next to Hange hands her the drink and laughs. “Because once you drink that, someone’s getting pregnant!”

Hange’s eyes widen. “That sounds inconvenient. Ah well, I’ll take my chances.” They down the drink and the bartender and women cheer, patting their back.

Suddenly Levi noticed a grizzled man stumble over to them.

“Hey…so just what ARE you anyway?” He leans his hand on Hange’s barstool and Levi can smell the alcohol reeking off of him.

His presence doesn’t phase Hange in the least. “I, sir, am someone who is about to order another Shotgun Wedding. One more, please!”

“No..” his body moves closer to Hange and Levi sits up a little straighter, “I mean, are you a girl or boy or WHAT?”

Hange scoffs and then grabs their drink.

“We don’t like your kind here,” he yells.

“It seems people like us just fine,” Hange turns to look at him, “you just gotta give me a chance.” Then they plant a big, wet kiss on the man’s lips.

The man reacts by spinning Hange’s chair around and raising his fist. In an instant, Levi is up and punches the man hard in the gut.

“Hands off, motherfucker,” Levi threatens, both hands squeezed into fists.

The drunk man’s friends rush toward the bar, but Levi and Hange are able to dodge their fists easily. Hange gives one a right hook to his chin, and Levi takes on two of them. Eventually, they’re all knocked out and sprawled along the dirty floor.

Levi grabs Hange’s arm. “Come on, let’s get out of here before we piss more of them off.”

They bolt out of the door and run down the quiet street, turning into a darkened park to catch their breath.

“Wooo! I haven’t felt that alive in a long time! I forgot what a bad-ass you are, Levi!” Hange is jumping up and down amongst the trees and broken playground equipment.

Levi pushes them slightly. “You idiot! You could’ve gotten hurt in there!”

“But I didn’t, because you were there.”

“And what if I hadn’t been there, huh? What would you have done then?”

“Awww…you were worried about me..”

Hange’s teasing riles Levi up even more. “Because I love you, you dumbass!”

Hange just stands there, speechless. Levi can’t believe he just said that out loud, but there’s no turning back now.

“That's why I always agree to your stupid ideas, like this roadtrip. I just… want to be with you…” he huffs.

“Levi..” Hange says as they move closer. They cup Levi’s cheeks and his heart starts beating fast, then he leans in to kiss them. When they pull back, his cheeks are cherry-red.

Hange still has his face in their hands. “You’re so cute when you’re flustered.”

Levi jerks his face back, embarrassed. “Never mind, forget what I said...” He starts walking down the street to their motel.

“No take-backs!” Hange says as they put an arm around Levi.

——

LeviHan fans and Squad Denial: @youre-ackermine @this-is-krikkit @wanderlustqueen-writes - I hope I did you proud!