I don't know if you're taking requests, but would you consider Bucky with a girl best friend who doesn't want you dating Bucky?
Hi, nonnie! I don't think I could do that request justice! I'm sorry. I'm working on an upcoming series where an OC isn't fond of you getting close to Bucky, but it's secondary to the overarching plot and she is not even close to being Bucky's best friend if you ask him. Coworker at best.
I believe @kinanabinks has a series with a female best friend OC who tries to sabotage your relationship with Bucky though and @scoonsalicious has something in the works if you haven't checked either of those out!
Lovelies, if anyone has any suggestions, please feel free to add.
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each volume of fic recs will feature ten wonderful writers and eun's favorites of their works!
@kinanabinks | in my hands | walnut handshakes | no more mr. nice guy | the penthouse | it’s only natural
@hansensgirl | go ahead and cry, little girl | you better not shout | and i'll cry if i want to | like smarty does | i'm in the water | favorite flavors | brooklyn’s favorite phantom | the big, bad werewolf
@mypoisonedvine | bankrupt | the martyrdom of st. valentine
@onsunnyside | little fears | third eye | crybaby | flamingo king | sad girl | step by step | miss misery | wish i may, wish i might | put me in a movie | why are you scared | fraternal instincts | hell’s kitchen
@avintagekiss24 | polar
@angrythingstarlight | wind you up & tie you down
@cloudystevie | you are my delusion | red, white, blue's in the sky
@nony-bear | captain jealousy | matched
@jtargaryen18 | all heaven in a rage | dark commander | barber & weiss | naughty ransom holiday tales | how i disappeared
Ollo, how are you? Would you mind doing Bucky, Steve or whoever you want with a fem!reader who's flat? Like she compares herself to other girls because while she has an A or B cup, the other girls have C or D cups and she just feels like she's not satisfying enough
on it!
decided to do steve because i feel like being captain america's girlfriend would be a LOT of pressure-
All Yours, Forever
content warning: steve x insecure!reader, secret relationship, angst, self-deprecation, anxiousness, fluff, hurt/comfort.
That pink bikini in the summer before tenth grade. Bra shopping with your mother. Oddly-fitting dresses that evoked whispered comments from your aunts.
Funnily, your brain thinks of those things during moments like these. It associates this feeling of unworthiness with those traumatic memories, which makes sense enough.
Pink bikini. Bras. Bitchy aunts.
Dread and sadness and a little anger.
You shouldn't still be feeling like this. You're a grown woman.
Really? Could've fooled me with that chest.
Shut up. Why are you so mean to you?
Focus.
You look back up. There he is; your Steve. Turning down another date because he's yours. Being asked on a date because nobody knows he's yours.
It was your idea to keep your relationship a secret. You can't even begin to imagine how America will react when they learn that their Captain has a girl. What if you fumble under the pressure? What if you ruin his image? What if they tell him he deserves better and he agrees with them?
Things are better this way. They're more fun, too, and you get a little adrenaline rush whenever he sneaks you a hidden kiss during a press event.
This is the shitty part, though. Seeing the kind of women he could be with instead. While he mingles with the other party goers, you can't help but notice that a certain type of person seems to have stolen his attention.
She's beautiful, makes him smile, and has a body you'd kill for. And there's been about 8 of her so far tonight.
"I'm jealous, too," Sam mumbles from next to you, handing you a glass of whiskey. "Seems nobody's worth talking to unless he's Captain America. How come nobody wants to flirt with the Falcon?"
"Firstly: I'm not jealous," You reply stubbornly, before narrowing your eyes at him. "And secondly: I once witnessed you getting 4 numbers in the space of fifteen minutes. Everyone wants to flirt with the Falcon, and you know it."
Chuckling, Sam pats your shoulder. "You know, if that were my man, I'd kiss him in front of all of these people just to show them who he belongs to."
You wince at the thought of it. Going public. Could there be anything worse?
"Alright," Sam says, not entirely convinced. "If you say so."
"Let him have his fun," You say casually with a shrug. "He's been feeling a little overshadowed by Carol lately. He could do with an ego boost."
You're left alone again, but this time the thoughts are louder. The voice of your aunts have chimed in.
How old is she now? When I was that age, I was a lot more developed.
I'm concerned she won't do any more growing.
What kind of a man will want an underdeveloped wife?
Whiskey is good at drowning them out. The ice clinks against the glass as you gulp it down, and you take to sucking on the alcohol-soaked cubes while praying nobody will stop you from getting drunk enough to forget your insecurities.
"I don't know what's more shocking," His warm, silky voice calls out just before you get the chance to order a tequila. Steve stands beside you at the bar before continuing. "The fact that you're standing here alone, or the way you look exactly like the angel in my dreams."
You want to feel flattered by his words. To float on the cloud of his sweet compliments and promises, silver-lined by his smile. But you can't let yourself crash to the ground again.
"Thanks, Cap," You reply flatly, keeping your eyes on your drink.
With a frown, Steve glances around. "You know, there's nobody around us, buttercup. You could probably even sneak me a little kiss, if you love me."
You can't stop the soft giggle that leaves your mouth, before you catch yourself and look down. "You'd be so lucky."
He sits down next to you, gently nudging your arm with his. "What's going on, buttercup? I saw you turn down Thor's offer to dance earlier, and you never give up the chance to bring out my possessive side."
"I think I'm feeling possessive enough for the two of us tonight," You admit with a dry laugh.
Knowing immediately what you're talking about, Steve's mouth curls up. "Yeah, there's been a lot of 'em tonight, huh? Keep telling Tony to improve security; half of them aren't even SHIELD."
You hum in response, looking down at your dress. The plunge neck feels like a stupid choice now that you really see yourself in it, being as there's nothing on show. It's as though the red curtains have opened, but the stage is empty.
You're such an idiot. You look a fool in this dress.
"You aren't upset about them, are you?" Steve asks cautiously, pulling your attention back to him. "You know I'd never reciprocate any of their flirting- I'd never do anything to disrespect you or our relationship-"
"I know, Steve," You assure him with a smile. "I know you. I wasn't afraid of that."
Disloyal is hardly how you'd describe Steve. He'd never cheat on you. He may realize he wants someone with a bustier chest and break up with you, though.
"Good," He says softly, looking around to make sure nobody's watching before planting a gentle kiss on your cheek.
Running your hands over the fabric of your dress, you sigh. "I'm not sure if this dress is... complementary of my body."
He almost looks offended. Taken aback, Steve frowns, looking you up and down. "What? But you look absolutely beautiful, buttercup. Has someone said something? Was it Sam? I saw him talking to you- if he said something-"
"Sam didn't say anything. Nobody did," You insist, smiling at how overprotective he is, before your smile falls again. "I just think it doesn't really suit me."
"Doesn't suit you?" Steve asks, utterly baffled. "Baby, with all due respect, what are you talking about? The color is gorgeous against your skin, the silk makes it hard to keep my damn hands off you, and you know what a good leg slit does to me, honey darling."
Resting your head on your hand, you lean forward. "My boobs are too small," You mumble, your words muffled by your palm.
Steve is shocked. Immediately, he wraps his arm around you and pulls you closer, his heart racing. "What? Did- did someone say that?"
"They didn't have to," You sigh, playing with your fingers. "I just know it."
"Oh, baby, are you kidding me?" Steve asks softly, stroking your arm. "Nothing about you is 'too' anything."
"But those other women that were talking to you-"
"What about them, huh?" He questions you with a raised brow.
Meekly, you shrug. "They're... sexier than me. They'd better satisfy you."
"Better satis- buttercup, are you hearing yourself?" He shakes his hand, tightly holding your hand. "You more than satisfy me. Do you not remember what a pathetic mess you had me reduced to last night?"
Your cheeks heat up at the memory and you hide your face in his chest. "Steeeeeve."
"And your boobs are the things of dreams."
"Oh, please-"
"I'm being serious. I have many, many dreams about them," Steve admits, cupping your face in his hand and making you look up at him as his eyes twinkle with mischief. "I love how sensitive they are. I bet if I was to just run my thumb over your dress right now, I'd instantly feel your nipple getting hard."
Shocked by how outwardly sexual he's being in public, you cling onto his jacket and bite your lip. "You're so naughty, Captain."
Smiling down at you, he leans closer and gives you a sweet kiss, stealing your breath. "Can't help it. You just have that effect on me." With a sigh, he tucks your hair behind your ear. "There is absolutely nothing I'd change about you. You're my baby buttercup. I love you."
"I love you," You reply softly, keeping our lips a whisper away from his and melting into his safety. "So, I guess everyone knows about us, now."
Steve glances to the side where Sam and Bucky are giving him proud thumbs up, and the others are sharing whispered claims, saying they knew it all along and totally saw it coming.
"I guess they do," He mumbles, before looking back down at you. "Is that okay? Or should I threaten them all into never mentioning it?"
Laughing, you shake your head before giving him another kiss. "Let them talk. At least they all know you're mine, now."
"I am," Steve promises, his blue eyes filled with devotion. "All yours, forever."
i no longer use a taglist, but if you follow @kinanabinksupdates and turn on notifications, you'll know when i have updated 🥰
i saw your request for soft anakin thoughts and after that incredible review of immoral i just had to comply with your wish-
i couldn't really think of anything amazing so let's just go on a first date with him
• anakin is a big man who strikes fears in the hearts of his enemies
• but you're just so cute he can't help but melt into a puddle when he sees you
• he finally plucks up the courage to ask you out after like a year of pining after you. he knows you're an incredible person who everyone wants a piece of so he's reluctant and draws back at first
• it take the clones, obi and ashoka egging him on and giving him confidence boosts for him to finally get the choobies to do something about his obvious feelings for you
• you see a group of them in the library one day. they're all frantically whispering in anakin's ears and you're Kinda Scared
• "is this the book you needed?" he asks while reaching up and picking up the thickest encyclopedia from the top shelf
• you look down to the cover. '5,000 facts about ancient weaponry'. then you look at the list in your hand of rom-com novels you actually came for and give him a confused look
• but you see the light in his eyes and you just can't bring yourself to kill it.
• "yes. that's exactly what i came here for, general skywalker, thank you."
• he blushes and stumbles over his words, "n-no it's- i mean, call me anakin." in his head he's speeding over all the different ways the clones have told him to ask you out, but right now none of them feel right
• "okay... anakin," you say, liking the way his name rolls off your tongue. "i'm y/n, but you can call me tonight. at 7"
• he almost faints. "huh"
• you laugh, "sorry, was that way too forward? it's just that i would love to take you on a date"
• his cheeks go pink and his flesh hand starts lightly tapping against his thigh, mirroring the fluttering beat of his heart.
• "that- i would like that very much, y/n"
• "will the troopers be coming with?" you tease, glancing behind him to see a bunch of them staring at the interaction with wide eyes.
• anakin tries to let out a deep, natural chuckle, but it comes out strained. "ignore them, they're idiots"
• you dress up cute for the summer evening date, and so does he holy fuck
• a loose, tan colored blouse sits on his upper body, and his slim black trousers make him somehow seem taller
• but his hair
• holy fuck his hair
• he has it pulled back into a loose bun, a few strands left behind which frame his face. like chocolate feathers against vanilla milk
• you're quick to compliment him but he's a stuttering mess. he can't believe how shy he gets around you after dealing with sith lords with the confidence of a king and the humor of a jester, but now it seems as though he's but a commoner outside of the palace looking in
• and you, mother of moons, you're the queen
• after a few drinks and some small talk, he relaxes. he's able to finally tell you he loves that color on you, and that he could listen to you hiccup after a big swig all day.
• now it's your turn to be shy, but your bashful giggles and the way your cheeks lift up with every stupid sentence he says once again renders him speechless, and he wants to bite one of them to see if they'd melt in his mouth because they look like they would
• so it's been the cutest date ever and he's dropping you off at home. and he's been so chivalrous and sweet all night and now it's coming to an end and you both kinda don't want it to but you're both also terrified of what inviting him in for a coffee means. so he just places the gentlest most tender kiss on your cheek, holds back from biting it, and feels it heating up before his lips even pull away
• when you hug him, anakin swears his heart skipped a beat. he feels ripped in half when he has to go back to his own dorm
• he doesn't sleep all night, replaying the date. there's something about you that reminds him of his home. no, not the rough and the coarse and the irritating, but the love and the warmth and the familiarity
• there wasn't much of it on tatooine but it's like you took his best moments from his childhood - winning pod races, hugging his mother, playing with his friends - and you amplified them
• and it's really hard to handle that kind of joy when you've never much joy before, but anakin takes a deep breath and lets himself fall into you.
• your name becomes synonymous with safety, your voice is the sound of love, your smile a gateway to heaven
•••
hope u liked this wtf it got so long i'm sorry but i hope it quenched your need for soft anakin (although that is a plant that will never be watered enough)
Dude. DUDE
YOU JUST OUTLINED A WHOLE FIC IN MY ASK BOX
like this is my canon first date with Anakin everybody oh my god
like you did this FOR WHAT
can I legally print this and put it in a frame on my wall like a fancy poem
Its the way I would steal the ancient artifacts book and never give it back for me 😌
WOW THAT WAS SUCH A CONFIDENT MOVE TO ASK HIM LIKE THAT WOW
HIS HAIR HIS HAIR HIS HAIR HIS HAIR HIS HAIR HIS HAIR HIS HAIR HIS HAIR HIS HAIR HIS HAIR HIS HAIR FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
its official im drawing it thats amazing oh my god this mental image is the most I have ever been attracted to the man
the kiss on the cheek🥺
THE THROWBACK AND IMAGERY TO TATOOINE HAS ME FEELING FUZZY THINGS IN MY TUMMY OH MY GOD
dude i love you im in love with you thank you i literally will do anything you want ever oh my god
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Steve needs to face the truth, and Bucky's determined to fix things.
Content Warning: Frat!Steve x Frat!Bucky, ANGST, fluff, Frat!Steve x Reader, Frat!Bucky x Reader, sexual themes.
🎥
James Buchanan Barnes is a goddamn idiot. He's a lousy friend, and a downright good-for-nothing son of a bitch. A stupid dickhead. A thoughtless prick. An absolute cun-
"You gonna tell me where we're going?" Steve asks from the passenger seat, the wind blowing through his soft hair. His gentle voice has a way of making Bucky's self-hatred disappear. Like a magician, Steve makes Bucky feel like nothing but happiness has ever lived in his heart.
"It's a surprise," Bucky replies smoothly, keeping his eyes on the road. He knows that if he's to look over and see Steve with the breeze causing his hair to layer in that gorgeous way, and those overly expensive sunglasses making him look like some kind of fucking Hollywood star, Bucky will surely crash the car.
"Not fair," Steve says, the pout evident in his voice and making Bucky's heart pound.
"Nope," He retorts plainly. "Not gonna work on me this time, Rogers."
"Come on," Steve drags out, leaning over and resting his chin on Bucky's shoulder. "Tell me, puppy."
The nickname pulls out a breathy laugh from Bucky, who uses an eye-roll to hide the way he feels as though he has died and Steve is pulling him up to heaven. "Stop."
Chuckling, Steve knows he has Bucky right where he wants him. "You don't really want me to stop, do you?"
Shaking his head, Bucky trains his eye on the lines in the middle of the road, doing his best to remain calm. "If you keep flirting with me, I'mma have no choice but to kiss you, pretty boy."
"Is that a threat?" Steve teases, twirling a lock of Bucky's hair around his finger.
"It's a promise, honey," Bucky replies, smirking to himself. "You don't wanna mess with me."
"Gonna get your boyfriend to beat me up again?" Steve asks with a raised brow, moving back into his seat.
"That was over a year ago; get over it. Besides, I didn't ask Barry to fight you," Bucky says with a grumble. "I just complained about you putting me in a bad mood; he decided to punch you all on his own accord."
Steve glares at the memory, his hand clenching into a fist. "He was such a prick. I'm glad you broke up with him."
"I'm glad he gave you a black eye," Bucky teases, grinning. "I'd like to say that experience humbled you."
"Fuck you," Steve laughs, before looking at the big sign that says 'Entering Sudbury'. With a frown, he looks over at Bucky. "You brought us home?"
"Yup," The brunette confirms, the familiar sidestreets bringing with them an onslaught of memories. "I thought we could do with a break from the city. See some old faces; cure our homesickness."
You and Bucky have kept the kiss a secret from Steve. When they told you they were taking a trip out of town, you assumed Bucky would use the privacy to reveal what happened to Steve, and in a way you were relieved that you wouldn't have to be the one to break the news and have to see the look of betrayal on Steve's face.
The kiss is why Bucky is here right now. He's trying his best to fix yours and Steve's relationship as a way of alleviating his guilt.
"You missed the turn for our street," Steve mutters, feeling nauseous as the route becomes eerily familiar.
"I know," Bucky says coolly, taking a right into a cul-de-sac which fills Steve with dread.
"Buck," He whispers, hand fisting his seatbelt. "What are we doing here?"
Parking the car outside number 13, Bucky turns off the engine and undoes his seatbelt. "We're here to catch up with an old friend."
Reluctantly, Steve follows Bucky out of the car and up the concrete steps, his heart thudding harder the closer they get to the door. A few seconds after Bucky knocks, the door slowly opens.
Amanda grins widely when she sees the boys. "Oh, my handsome boys! I'm so glad to see you! It's been so long."
Taking a step forward, Steve smiles back at her. "Hi, Mrs. Carter."
•
"I'm just glad you're alright," Thor says with relief on his features as he takes your hand in his. "When I heard rumors that the police were called and the neighbors had heard fighting, I assumed the worst."
You smile up at him, putting down the menu book. "If it wasn't for you, it probably would've ended much worse. That's why tonight is my treat."
"Oh, no," He chuckles, shaking his head. "This place is too fancy for you to foot the bill yourself."
"Excuse you!" You scoff, leaning forward. "You indirectly saved my life; the least I can do is shell out for some lobster and wine."
Thor narrows his eyes. "You're an unemployed student with frankly neglectful parents. My dad is a stakeholder of Google."
Pursing your lips, you glance back down to the extortionate prices on the menu and raise a brow. "Uh... gosh, fine, I mean, if you insist."
He laughs before continuing with his perusal through the menu, and you do the same.
"Y/N?" A familiar voice suddenly calls out.
You look up to see Sam with Kayla on his arm, both of them looking surprised. "Hey guys!" You greet them excitedly. "I didn't know you were coming here tonight."
"Yeah; we're on a little date," Sam informs you, cautiously eyeing Thor. "Hey, man."
"Hello, Samuel!" Thor replies eagerly. "And you must be Kayla, right? I vaguely remember meeting you at a party..."
You and Kayla share a wide-eyed look. He means the rave in the woods where you went to stake out Beryl and the boys; the day she dyed her hair and wore that damn denim dress.
"You went to a party?" Sam asks her, confused.
"Uh, T must be confused," You say quickly. "You guys enjoy your night!"
"We'll be sure to send a bottle of wine to your table," Thor says kindly, placing his hand back on yours with a warm smile. "In honor of young love!"
Sam looks down at Kayla, and she looks back up at him. Are you on a fucking date with Thor right now? Knowing the kind of man Thor is, Sam doesn't trust him with you, and Kayla seems to share his opinion.
"You know what would be fun?" She asks with a gasp, tugging on Sam's arm. "If we joined you!" There's no way in hell she's gonna let you date someone else, and both her and Sam are more than happy to cockblock Thor.
"That sounds wonderful!" Thor gleams, and you agree- though you're surprised that Sam and Kayla wouldn't prefer to have their date alone.
They push another table to yours and sit down, Sam next to you and Kayla next to Thor. "So, are you guys here to... celebrate anything in particular?" Kayla asks carefully, looking between the two of you.
You and Thor share a look and he gently nudges her shoulder with a wink. "I have to take Y/N out for fancy meals every now and then or else she gets bored. She definitely makes it worthwhile, though.
Used to his flirty nature and knowing that he's talking about how you treat him to ice cream after he buys you dinner, you laugh it off. But Sam and Kayla are feeling anything but humored.
'Oh, my God,' Kayla mouths to Sam. 'Are they fucking?'
He just shrugs in response, bewildered, before clearing his throat. "So, uh, you guys come here often?"
"Not really," You reply coolly. "I prefer making Thor cook for me. He's an amazing chef."
"And an amazing eater!" Thor adds on with a hearty chuckle, shooting you a playful wink.
"Oh, yeah; an incredible eater. It's truly astounding," You say with a laugh, thinking about how Thor is able to eat your body weight in food in one sitting.
Sam and Kayla, on the other hand, have their minds in the gutter. Subtly, Kayla brings her hand up to her mouth, making a V shape with her fingers and sticking her tongue between them just to really make sure Sam knows that the conversation is most definitely about how good Thor is at giving oral sex.
"Wow," Sam breathes out, feeling ill. "I didn't know you guys were..."
"Were what?" You ask with a frown.
"He didn't think we were so close," Thor explains with a nod. "Honestly, people are usually surprised when they find out about us." It was true; many people found it odd that the two of you were friends.
"Yeah," Kayla whispers, incredibly taken aback and slightly offended. "I mean, I would've thought you'd have told me at least, Y/N."
Confused, you frown. "What do you mean, Kay? You knew about me and Thor."
"What?" Sam asks, an accusatory look on his face while Kayla sits like a deer in headlights.
"What?" You repeat with a laugh. "What are you guys so confused about? You've both known about us since freshman year. Thor was like, the first friend I ever made."
"So that means you have to fuck him?" Sam questions you incredulously, making your heart skip a beat while Thor chokes on his spit.
At first, you're incredibly offended- but then you realize that there's been a grave misunderstanding. Sharing a mischievous look with Thor, you decide to have some fun. "Yes," You say to Sam bluntly. "And what about it?"
"Yeah; what's it to you?" Thor asks him with a fake glare.
"What's it- what's it to me?" Sam sputters, flabbergasted. "Are you really asking me that?"
"I don't see why you're so riled up about our incredible love-making," Thor shoots, furrowing his brows.
"Relax, T," You say soothingly, rubbing the back of his hand. "They could never understand what we have."
Kayla's eyes are wider than ever as she leans forward. "Y/N, what the fuck are you talking about? Steve broke up with you barely three weeks ago, and now you have something with this guy? You're fucking this guy?"
"Hey now," Thor says sternly. "It's up to Y/N who she fucks."
"Alright, alright," You interject quickly, placing a hand on Sam's arm. "Everyone, relax. We were kidding."
"Don't you talk about her like you know her," Sam says with a clenched jaw. "I oughta beat your white ass-"
Sam narrows his eyes at you. "Huh?"
"What do you mean?" Kayla asks with a scoff.
"You guys are the ones that assumed we were on a date," You say with your hands help up in surrender. "We simply played along."
Gradually relaxing his face, Sam purses his lips. "You little shits."
Chortling gleefully, Thor claps his hands together. "Oh, that was too much fun. We really must go out together more, Samuel."
With a grimace, Sam nods. "For sure."
•
"And this was the party we threw to celebrate your first day of high school," Amanda reminisces, handing the glossy photograph to Bucky. Him and Steve look with warm grins at the image of the two of them with their arms linked in each of Peggy's, who is mid-laugh. There's a big milk stain on Bucky's shirt which Steve remembers is what Peggy was laughing at, and he feels his heart bloom with fondness at the memory.
"I was so angry at her that day," Bucky recalls with a soft laugh. "Kept tryna get her back but Steve never let me get the chance." He also remembers the slight bitterness he felt towards Peggy when he learnt of Steve's crush on her, but he keeps that to himself.
"You always were so protective over her," Amanda says, putting down the box of photographs. "You boys made her life so wonderful. I will forever be grateful to you both. Though her life was short, it was beautiful, and that's largely down to you."
Steve places his hand on Bucky's, and the brunette takes a deep breath in effort to ignore the butterflies erupting in his stomach.
Clapping her hands together, Amanda smiles warmly. "Enough about the past. How are you boys doing?"
They share a glance and Bucky smiles back at her. "We're great." Sure, they just had some of the craziest few weeks of their lives, but he chooses to leave that part out.
"Oh, you can give me more than that," She says teasingly, winking at Steve. "Any cute girls on your arm, Steven?" Deep down, she's hoping to hear that the boys have finally addressed the romantic tension between them - but she knows that would be expecting too much from her favorite pair of idiots.
Steve is astounded by her question. The way that she can so casually ask her dead daughter's ex-boyfriend about whether he's moved on from the aforementioned dead daughter shocks him. Speechless, he remains silent, his heart thudding in his chest.
"Our Stevie has got himself an absolute angel," Bucky answers on his behalf, pulling his hand out from under Steve's before continuing. "Y/N's just beautiful - I'm telling you, Amanda, if you saw her, you'd think she had just walked right off a movie set. But she isn't just beautiful, she's real smart, too. One of her essays got published in some big-deal academic magazine last year, and she's always top of her class." Getting lost in the thought of you, Bucky's eyes light up. "And Amanda, she's so sweet she'd damn near trigger old-man-Harrison's blood sugar. Kindest thing in the world, with not a single bad bone in her. She- she's amazing, Amanda. Not a half-inch less than perfect. And you know, her and Steve look an absolute picture together. The kind of couple you have to do a double take when you pass by in the street to make sure they're not celebrities or something. I- and they really love each other."
During the monologue, Steve watches Bucky. He listens in as Bucky raves on about you, recognizing the devotion in his eyes. And he feels it, too.
Soon after that, the boys take their leave. Steve requests Bucky to drive them around their hometown, each of them pointing out spots that have meaningful memories attached.
When they reach the skate park they used to frequent, they sit on the side of the rink, swinging their legs over the edge. "You see how thrilled Amanda was to hear about you and Y/N?" Bucky asks, nudging Steve's shoulder. "She was so happy to hear that you had moved on. And Stevie, Peggy would be just as happy, too."
It feels as though a weight has melted off of Steve's chest. No longer does he feel the panic or dread when he thinks about being with you, but he does realize how much he fucking misses you. Though the town is a blast to the past, he doesn't feel stuck there anymore. Instead, he appreciates being there, as if he's looking at a photograph rather than being trapped in limbo.
They sit for a little while, but Steve can't keep his thoughts to himself any longer once they stand up. "You love her," He states as the sun beats down on them, shielding his eyes with his hand.
With a frown, Bucky turns back to him. "What?"
"Bunny," Steve clarifies with a smile. "You love her."
A scoff leaves Bucky's mouth as he plays with the car keys in his hand. "Of course I love her, Rogers."
Taking a step closer, Steve lowers his voice. "Just as much as I do."
Defensively, Bucky shakes his head. "The fuck are you talking about?" Does he know about the kiss? Fuck, fuck, fuck.
But Steve isn't angry at all. He doesn't a single bout of jealousy. Instead, he feels even more enamored. He takes Bucky's hand into his and pulls him closer. "I know you want me."
Pulling his hand back, Bucky snorts. "What; just because I'm into guys? Get your head out of your ass, Rog."
"You've always wanted me," Steve states confidently, folding his big arms across his chest. "That's why you didn't get along with Peggy as much once I started dating her. That's why you never get along with any of the girls I get with- except Y/N. Because you want her just as much."
Bucky lets out a shaky breath. Is he dreaming? Is this a nightmare that ends with Steve killing him?
Steve takes another step closer, cupping Bucky's cheek in his hand. "And maybe I want you back."
Nope. Not a nightmare. Just another wet dream.
"Oh, please," Bucky says dryly, pushing away Steve's hand. "Did you not just hear yourself? I don't get along with any of the girls you get with. The girls, Steve, because there's never been any guys because you're not into guys."
"There's never been any guys because I'm scared," Steve corrects him bluntly. "Because coming out would mean my feelings for you aren't just platonic, and I didn't know how to handle that possibility."
With a long sigh, Bucky rubs his forehead. "Steve-"
"The summer after freshman year-"
"You were a college kid who wanted to experiment," Bucky says coldly, taking back control of the conversation. "You know how many guys come to me who just want to experiment? And a week later, they're back with their girlfriends. I'm not just a fucking toy for you to carry out your fetishes on."
Steve furrows his brows, hating that Bucky could ever think that way. "That is not what that was. You mean so much more to me than that. Those nights with you were incredible; you're the one who ended it before things went too far."
"Because it was just some stupid fun!" Bucky exclaims, frustration dripping from his tone.
Steve raises a brow. "So you didn't feel anything?"
Bucky shrugs, taking a few steps back. "It doesn't matter whether I did or not, because you didn't."
"Yes I did."
A nervous laugh leaves Bucky's mouth as he shakes his head. "Steve."
With a sigh, Steve looks around the abandoned skate park where he and Bucky first met. Where they would compliment each other's tricks, come up with wild dreams for the future, and tend to each other's wounds. It was here that Bucky came out to Steve, telling him that he felt the same way about boys that he did about girls. It was here that Steve offered to give Bucky his first kiss, to make sure he didn't give it to some other bozo who didn't deserve it because every other boy in their class was an idiot. It was here that Bucky accepted Steve's offer, because Steve was part of the reason he was able to come to terms with his sexuality.
It was here that they kissed, here that Bucky's heart latched onto Steve, and here that Steve broke it when he laughed the kiss off and went straight back to fucking skating.
"I took a step back. From you, and from bunny," Steve begins while the sun begins to set. "The distance allowed me to see things from afar. Realize things; realize that..." Stepping closer, he clears his throat. "I love you."
"Steve," He mutters, unable to meet his eyes. "Stop it."
"I love her," Steve continues stubbornly. "You love me. You love her."
Wincing, Bucky shakes his head. He shouldn't feel this way. "Stop it."
"She loves me," Steve goes on to say, placing his hand on Bucky's shoulder. "And Buck, she fucking loves you."
Bucky's gaze is firmly stuck to the ground, tears blurring his vision. "You don't know that."
A small smile plays at Steve's lips. "I do."
"Just drop it, okay?" Bucky implores, finally looking up to meet Steve's eyes, blue on blue on blue on blue. "I wanna go home."
Knowing that Bucky is soft and fragile, and needs to be handled with care, Steve relaxes and decides to drop it. For now. "Okay. Okay, Buck. Let's go home."
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