#k-pop problems

This is a long one but please, bear with me. So I’ve been a rabid fan of the K-Pop genre of music since about 3-4 years (and counting) now, and over the course of being one, you may all have come across similar experience and insight about a lot of things regarding said genre. From learning about culture in Korea, to knowing how their music industry works, to stuff like following your favourite idols and learning more about them as people on and off stage, to maybe even things like language and food. You’ve also - like me - come across the struggles of just BEING a fan and the stereotypes that exist both inter/extro-culturally and/or perceptually. And as a fan, you know exactly what I’m talking about; the makeup jokes, the language barrier argument, the pedestal these idols are placed on, the ridicule for simply having a passion for this Korean culture influence altogether. And frankly over time I even explain to fellow fans who may have to face these difficult critics and such that “hey, you like it so continue on and don’t worry about what the haters or, I guess, ‘difficult people’ have to say.” But today, for the first time in a LONG time, I was in that very position of having to swallow the irritation and not overreact. A person who is farther into adulthood than I am and whom I have immense respect for and get along with had the unfortunate perception of “He looks like a girl” after I showed her a member of a group. I know what you’re thinking; here we go… We had somehow gotten onto the topic of my passion for the fandom and my love for the fashion and music, and she commented that while some did look “manly enough”, the ones who had a bit more make up suddenly looked “abnormally feminine”. Now of course, EVERYONE. IS. ENTITLED. TO. THEIR. TASTES AND OPINIONS. Definitely not discouraging that because otherwise, the world would be a boring place and we’d all be mirrors of each other taking away the contrast and salad bowl of minds in this world. But personally, it really got to me and I was genuinely shocked that something I’ve buffered myself against for years now suddenly evoked an old reaction from me. She continued to say that “Des, you wouldn’t find a guy at your college or workplace looking like that, it’s not your everyday societal norm” and while that is an almost predictable standpoint to have, it also sounded like as if it was the most absurd thing to my ears. Now my head was like “So WHAT if it’s not? What IS deemed the norm of this society? Do you even realize in the Shakespearean age, MEN were the only ones allowed to act and they dressed from head to toe in women’s clothing and make up? Did you know HEELS were originally invented for men’s wear? NO? I thought not. But no PLEASE. Please continue spewing utter nonsense in a world that has evolved WAY more than what we can comprehend or even try to label and categorize.” BUT INSTEAD… I proceeded to calm down and explain to her that our fandom has already faced the never ending “they all look the same” and “they all look like girls” statements (some of them more disrespectful worded), even about how “I understand why she is one of the 100 others who’ve regurgitated the same thing to fans like me.” And frankly, I didn’t even realize how stern I sounded until the words escaped me. As much as she is dignified as a person, I guess I also didn’t appreciate the tone of voice she used. It was one of those tones that seems blatant of the words being spoken but has that key undertone made obvious that “this view you have is ridiculous”. As you can see, I just suddenly had a storm of things to say back as a rebuttal but my “freedom of speech” was limited to the fact that it would just be out of place and silly to get onto a soap box about it and argue with someone whom I know has too sturdy a thought process to even try and shake, let alone influence. I guess it’s a blessing and a curse to her intellect (hence why this was so difficult for me to react to the way I TRULY honestly wanted to) I have more self control than that, apparently. What she also mentioned, that further buried into my skin, was her stigmatized view as to “what’s masculine or feminine”. When I showed her more “built” members, more buff or stronger jawlines apparently hid the make up aspect for her which, I guess, earned some kind of approval (Are you kidding me?). It just kinda appalled me given that she really isn’t a backward person, but in that moment, it felt like she was. She went as far as to telling me that “if you, Des, saw this person on the street, you would label him a girl automatically” (Chyah, someone hold me back!) BUT AGAIN… I calmed and said “the more you naturalize your exposure to K-Pop the more you can tell them apart and EVEN pin point the femininity and masculinity of a member.” (Someone gimme a badge for my tolerance) And there were other things she said that I’ve heard the essence of many, MANY times before (and at the moment my head is a just a blender of agitation so I can’t really find the words to fully paint the picture) But I guess it boils down to the fact that I’m tired - ABSOLUTELY tired - of being present in this day and age and still having to face stereotypical thought processes that bother and even go as far as to hurt my feelings, and most likely other people too, at a bone deep level. And as a K-Pop fan and Asian culture nut in general, I just wanna say it’s terribly disappointing to have to observe what a narrow perspective can do to define what’s feminine or masculine in this world. I hope all my fellow fans or ANY type of fan in general can continue to buffer themselves from negativity, can learn to bite their tongues even when you feel your gut is on fire, and continue to love the things you love and not worry about slinging mud at haters. (Don’t get your hands dirty) Also relatably, don’t feel like you have to totally battle someone who you may know well or care about just because they have a different view on something. Everything is a two way street when it comes to perception so just try to breathe, and be the bigger person by showing patience rather than rashness. Yeah yeah I know, “It’s easier said than done, Des” but trust me: Try. It’s better to think out a mature way to face something. Sometimes silence can also speak louder than words. - drops mic like Rap Monster -

Fans request Kangin's removal from Super Junior

"It is self-evident that there will be damage to the group promotions of Super Junior due to the criminal offense of Super Junior member Kangin, so in the belief that it is unfair for Kangin to continue promoting under the name of Super Junior, we relay our opinions through this statement. After the problem of Kangin not being present in the reserve forces after the hit-and-run DUI incident of 2009, he has yet again caused an issue. The repeated actions of Kangin could actually be injurious to Super Junior's career, so we request that Kangin leave the group."