#juminhan4ever

thanks for requesting! i hope you like it <3 @juminhan4ever

series: 500 followers event

pairing: Jumin x Reader [Mystic Messenger]

note: tw for alcoholism. set one year after V’s route.

song: Animal I Have Become - Three Days Grace

So what if you can see the darkest side of me? No one will ever change this animal I have become. Help me believe it’s not the real me

The first sign that startled you was during a dinner for two you had shared in his penthouse. While you were making conversation, he excused himself to bring another bottle of wine. That was when you realized he had emptied a bottle of wine by himself. His speech wasn’t slurred, his hand movement still practised and elegant when he eventually sent you out for the night. You let that slide, thinking he must have a higher tolerance to alcohol than you did, considering you hadn’t even finished your glass.

But then Jaehee had texted you out of the blue, confessing she had found an empty bottle of wine on the floor of Jumin’s car. Driver Kim made it sure to clean it every day after dropping Jumin home, so someone must have drank it the same day she found it. Taking into consideration the only person who had rode that car was her boss and it was only 10 am, she couldn’t help but get concerned.

You asked Jaehee to send Jumin away for at least half an hour while you searched inside his office. She did as told and guarded the door while you looked around. Aside from the photo of V, Rika and Jumin that made your heart clench due to everything that went down the past year, there wasn’t anything out of the blue. You sat on his chair and kicked the desk in frustration. A cling noise made you alert. You had checked the drawers and it was only filled with papers, where was that noise coming from? A few minutes later, you found a false bottom drawer, were there were at least five wine bottled hidden from sight. You left everything as you found it and then quietly left his office, telling Jaehee you would get back to her later. You wanted to confront Jumin by yourself, at least for the first time.

Jumin was, according to your quick online research, a functioning alcoholic. C&R was rising even when its resources had been used to the fight against Mint Eye. But ever since Jihyun had gone away, you could tell Jumin had changed. The news they couldn’t find a body in Rika’s apartment and Jumin’s failure to arrest the members of Mint Eye had taken a toll on him and now you felt dumb for not noticing his hobby had turned into an addiction. That’s why you decided to wait for him in his penthouse until he came back from work. As soon as you heard the door opening, you knew you were coming into a war. But it was all worth it if you could save him.

Jumin had never looked so distraught and furious when you told him he seemed to have an alcohol problem. He repeated it was just wine, and only the best kind. He mentioned C&R was doing great and he never missed any of his work meetings. He didn’t seem to listen to any word you were saying, angrily giving you evidence that he was fine, even if you knew he wasn’t. You took few steps until you were inches away from his face and inhaled deeply.

“Jumin, your breath stinks of alcohol. And it’s 6 pm on a Tuesday. How much have you drunk today?”

“I’m fine, why do you keep--”

“How much, Jumin?” you insisted. Jumin’s expression faltered and looked away from your face. After accepting you weren’t going to get an answer, you sighed. “Yeah. I figured that much”

“What do you want from me? I am doing what I can. C&R was in danger after the incident with Mint Eye and now we’re rising again. I don’t know why it’s a problem”

“It’s a problem because everyone relied on you. Me included. I…” you sighed. “You were the one in charge the intelligence unit. You were the one who lost your two best friends in the span of six months. And now you’re supposed to lead your company back to the top. The only problem there is that you’re doing it on your own.”

“What else am I supposed to do?” he asked, with a tired expression.

“Let me help” you said, taking Jumin’s hand and squeezing it. You weren’t sure if he actually blushed or it was just the warm colors from the sunset outside the penthouse’s windows.

“You know about management?” Jumin asked, this time his voice much softer and with a hint of humour that made you smile. You let go of his hand and put a strand of hair behind your ear.

“I don’t, sorry. But I do want to be by your side through all this. I’ve been told I’m good at being supportive” you shrugged. Jumin smiled softly and you felt like you could breathe again. You closed the space between the two of you and hugged him, burying your face on the crook of his neck. Even if he did smell like alcohol, his perfume definitely made up for it.

Suddenly, you felt him tense again and before you could ask, he put his hands on your shoulders and pushed you away. You furrowed your eyebrows.

“You shouldn’t do that, it’s not proper. You’re waiting for Jihyun” he reminded you with a stern voice. You took his hands off your shoulders but didn’t try to take his hand again. Crossing your arms in front of your chest, you looked at him.

“Yeah” you sighed “Kind of? I mean, I really hope he’s okay wherever he is. But it’s been a year and we only knew each other for eleven days. I care about Jihyun a lot, sure... But this isn’t about him? You’ve been a good friend to me these past year. And not only to me, but to everyone else at the RFA as well. So if he decides to return, I’ll celebrate his recovery, really. But I’m no longer… waiting for him, I guess” you shrugged.

Jumin stayed in silence for what it felt an eternity. You certainly weren’t expecting that topic to come up when you decided to confront Jumin about his drinking. You may or may have not had been experiencing different kind of feelings whenever you two had friendly dinner dates, but had refused to act on it, knowing your past history with Jihyun would make it complicated for him, even if you had stopped receiving letters for the past four months. But some days, whenever Jumin chuckled at one of your jokes, you were hopeful. Maybe, one day…

No. Not now.

“You don’t have to think about that now” you assured him, scratching the back of your head. “Right now, we should just focus on you. Maybe we could start by setting an appointment with a therapist? Then we can go from there” you suggested.

Your “facts” are based on your own interpretation of the chats and other little things. There are more than one variation of interpretation and you shouldn’t say it like you know the biggest secret :) He could have a girlfriend when he was at school or in university with V. Also V told Rika that Jumin is kinda “bad guy”. He knew he’s into some strange things. So THERE’S possibility. Especially after this phone call. Moreover RFA obviously can’t know his private life. They just make assumptions (Seven and this stupid rumor Jumin is gay). And Jumin don’t find such discussions appropriate, so he stay silent.

I...

what?

I’m objectively telling you very important and significant character traits, alongside an extremely well known meme that’s used repeatedly. This isn’t little things, nor am I acting like I know ‘his biggest secret’ (his biggest secret is that he sort of kind of loved Rika). If you had a character who constantly complained about growing hair on his palms and people warned him he needed to be careful because his eyesight might be going, you would know the game is hinting that this character uncontrollably jerks it, but in a PG setting.

Constantly making jokes about him shooting fireballs and becoming a wizard/being into black magic is the same thing, except that it means he’s a virgin who’s getting old, like a more explicit version of calling a girl a christmas cake. Neither of these things are ‘little things’, except that the references aren’t as clear in English, because we just call 30 year old virgins ‘losers’ instead of making jokes about how they gain super powers from their decades of repressed sexuality.

Consider what you’re trying to argue, here. Based off of a throwaway line in a phonecall, which as I told you is more than likely referencing Rika as that’s the only thing ever followed up on, you are positing that Jumin Han, a man who is extremely conservative, who disdains his father’s womanizing ways to the point that it is just thinly veiled hatred of it, who thinks that all women (except Rika) are the same - ie; gold diggers, women only interested in his power, looks, and money - and who has had this opinion since childhood because his step mother creepily tried to hit on him as a child

either

1 - had a girlfriend in high school or university, which I’m pretty sure would also coincide with the time he meets Rika and feels she’s the first woman not like the other women, and the first person who actually understands him, and no one ever mentions this girlfriend, not even Chairman Han, and she had zero effect on his opinion on women

2 - had random flings with women whom he borderline detests, in direct violation of his ethics, despite the fact that he is disgusted with his father for that very behavior

or, possibly,

3 - would risk his company by having sex with prostitutes, a scandal that could potentially ruin C&R, given that the majority of the investors are more conservative than he is, and Chairman Han merely having a third marriage was enough to rock the company.

There is no possibility that Jumin Han had another girlfriend, nor that he is nonvirginal. To suggest otherwise requires you to disregard vital portions of Jumin’s character and established lore, and furthermore ignore all of the input from other characters including Seven (who absolutely can and would pull up Jumin’s ex flings if he had them, just to tease him, because he has no boundaries) and the subtext provided by the game’s in-jokes.

Yes, it is true that Jumin finds the subject distasteful, but that doesn’t mean he’s hiding ex flings. The very fact that he refuses to even discuss the subject only lends credence to the fact that it’s against his sensibilities to have casual sex, which is the only possible sex he could have had.

20. comfort after a nightmare

There was always something difficult and heavy about waking from a nightmare. 

The lingering feeling that your heart is racing, the way your eyes flood with tears of dread, and the slight but ever-present tremors that are left behind in your body? 

Those were the worst part of it. 

There had been a time in your life where you were often plagued by these nightly terrors and they would make it so very hard for you to get any rest whatsoever. 

Those nights were so far from you. 

Things had changed so much since then, and you thought that you had been getting so much better. You had met so many great people through the RFA messenger, and you had met Jumin and grown close to him because of it and all the unfolded from it. The world spun on its head like a wicked whirlwind those eleven days. 

Jumin was everything for you, and you knew that he felt the very same way about you. It was like everything clicked when you met him. All the things that you had been so worried about or scared of just seemed to fizzle into nothing when he was there. 

It had been such a long time since you had been bothered by one of these nightmares that you woke up feeling that weight against your chest and a gasp for air left your lungs. You held yourself as tightly as you could and hoped that the feeling would go away before you stayed up for the rest of the night to avoid falling back into it. 

That was how you spent many nights in your apartment. However, you had been alone back then. You weren’t alone now. You were reminded of this fact when Jumin stirred awake and instantly put his attention on you. 

Jumin was right there with you now, and he would hold you close to him as long as it took to ease your woes as you quietly sobbed into his chest. 

“I’m here, Y/N.“ He would whisper. “I’m right here.” 

Hana isn’t a canon, because she is a creation of the webtoon’s artist

Why are you say your opinion like it’s the only truth? Why you think you’re right? He didn’t mentioned Rika. He talked about women. And there’s an answer like “oh so you had a woman before”. Okay, we have different opinions, but calm down with your spirits plz

Because it isn’t an opinion, it’s a fact, my friend. He absolutely wouldn’t mention Rika by name, given he’s specifically saying he doesn’t linger on the past there, and he especially wouldn’t bring her up by name that early in the route. His feelings for Rika are extremely complex and repressed, which is why they come out in how he treats Elizabeth.

As I said, it’s simply not possible for Jumin to have had a woman before. We are told exhaustively by every single person who knows Jumin that he’s never had a woman, and a woman in Jumin’s past simply doesn’t make sense according to his personality. Even if there were a chance of an interpretation where Jumin ‘tried it once, didn’t like it’, the game makes extra sure you know he’s a virgin by making repeated wizard jokes. Even when Jumin tells you everything about his past, there’s no mention of past women aside from he vague call that, at best, is referencing Rika (but is more just him establishing that he doesn’t linger on the past, and therefore wouldn’t dream of anyone in his past). 

Omg. Think what you want too. If you want to think you’re right let it be. Your stubbornness is odd and I absolutely can’t agree with you. Just... try to see another variations of possibilities. Jumin never answered the question himself.

The only one who is being stubborn is you. I’ve told you there is no possibility, I have explained to you why, and I have answered the question Jumin did not with overwhelming evidence. I do not know why you want so badly for Jumin to have exes, but he doesn’t. You are absolutely entitled to any headcanon you like for him, if that’s what you want, I just ask that you don’t go around trying to correct people wrongly, as you’re doing here.

But he was with the girl before. He said it in his phone call)))))

What are you talking about? I have all of his phonecalls on his route and I don’t know what phone call you mean. It seems vanishingly unlikely he’s had a girlfriend before, since Rika is the closest before MC to him having any romantic feelings. Which phonecall are you referring to?