#jim haggerty

Name: Jim Haggerty



Source: Porkin’ Across America (The Onion, 2012)



Category: Victim

Entity: The Flesh
 


Description: A news anchor and former co-host of Today Now! once had a van, a camera crew, a budget, and a dream to go on a cross-country trip to find the best pork dishes from established restaurants in every state in the USA. His obsession with pork drives everyone he was close to away from him. His pipes are clogged. His wife files for divorce the second episode. His dog kills another dog and he hears his last whimpers over the phone. He misses his niece’s funeral for the death he inadvertently caused. While at a stop in Indiana, he gets addicted to drinking pig’s blood after accidentally drinking it. Jim progressively gets more pig-like as the series continues. A series of accidents leads to his body parts getting replaced with a pigs’ – it was more affordable and he lost his insurance in the divorce. It started with his hard palate, then pig skin gets grafted on his arms after a series of burns. After suffering a heart attack, his internal organs get replaced with those of pigs because his body is actively rejecting his human cells. Another set of burns blasts off his hair and permanently fuses a plastic pig snout onto his own nose.