#iwrite rambles

Okayokayokay SO-

I love soulmate au's. I cannot tell you how many fics I've read or how many prompts I've played with or media I've consumed or how many bullshit ideas I've come up with in my own head for them, I CANNOT.

It's just - hhhhhhhhhhhh- Soulmate au's and Time Travel au's are just the shit that gets me out of bed some days 😩💖my world weary soul drinks that shit like medicine, okay?

That all being said, it's probably a little ambiguous which au I picked to some, so let me explain: There are two au's I'm mashing up here really, both are from fics I've read back in the day. One being a Clack fic and the other a Thilbo one 🤷‍♂️kind of calling myself out here but w/e, they were good fics.

The Thilbo one is easier to explain - the concept is "Heartsong" which is, literally what it says on the tin. You find out who your soulmate is the first time you hear them sing (and no, that does not mean everyone is just a naturally good singer - they can be ass at music but, the point is, when you hear them their song is the perfect song for you and your heart knows that). There's a lot of little nuances to this one - things like you hearing your heartsong when you dream so you always know the moment you find them. Also people who have quiet dreams because their heartsong died, sometimes before ever even meeting them. etc etc. The heartsong also seems to expand, in some respect, to instruments (as Thorin plays his harp one night and Bilbo starts to hum without thinking about it because it sounds wonderful to him and that's how Thorin finds out).

Overall, it's a very soft and sweet concept to me and as someone who has a deep love of music, it's also one of my very favourites.

The Clack one is a little less easy to explain? I think. Maybe because it's nuances are so round about but I'll do my best. The concept for this one is "I Only See Colour When I'm With You" - anyone who knows how Clack fics usually go knows where this is probably headed 😂 and I am sorry to have hurt you but, overall, the idea is: You live in a noir-esqu world where everything is black and white. This only changes when you find your soulmate, of course, who brings the world into full saturation and lets you see colour for - possibly - the first time in your life (I say possibly because I genuinely can't remember if you start out colourblind or if it's an age cap thing).

Unfortunately, for as much as I adore this concept, it's been a long damn time since I read the fic and I don't even know if it still exists somewhere. So I can't actually recall if it was a 'you have to touch them' or 'you have to hear them' thing but the fic takes place with Zack on the cliff right before Midgar where he holds Cloud and looks at the sky - so I'm willing to bet it's a touch thing.

I also really loved this fic because it was the first one I'd read that brought in the concept of multiple soulmates to me - As Cloud later sits with Aerith and sees the colour he couldn't see with Zack, meanwhile Aerith only sees black and white, because she was only able to see colour with Zack (who was never able to see colour with her, because he needed Cloud for that).

Essentially, they all needed each other to see the world in colour. As a polyam person who didn't quite realise I was poly back then, it was a very comforting (and now dearly cherished) fic.

Anyways! Now that you have the background on the two concepts, you can kind of get what I'm going for with this piece.

Tamarack, Micha and Qiu are all soulmates in a fuzzy, desaturated world (I'm sorry, I'm not cruel enough to but them in complete greyscale LOL) and the way you find your soulmate is by hearing them sing and, when they do, your world is suddenly vivid and bright and beautiful. Suddenly, you can see things as they were meant to be seen and it's a permanent change (unlike the Clack fic) but things are always clearest and brightest when your soulmate speaks or sings 💖

I get a real kick out of the idea that Micha's known for fucking months that Tamarack is his soulmate (if not years) because he's always listening to her play but never says jack shit about it because he's emotionally constipated that way 😂Though genuinely, it's probably because he just doesn't think he's her soulmate and he's a bit against finding out he's right honestly.

Song: Come Away With Me - Norah Jones

Who Are They?

The beautiful bride is @the-soupiest-artist's OC, Lyra. The handsome groom is my OC, Kit. You can see their 2025 submission [ here ]

What's the Story?

Anyways! Here's the next piece for @theocxcanonweek

Game: Our Life: Beginnings & Always Characters: China Schuyler x Cove Holden (ft. Baxter Ward}

tfw your new girlfrend's boyfriend is still salty with you for your past transgressions...

Ngl, sometimes I feel like Cove is just a soundboard for all my strongest impulses 🤣 I love him so dearly and I get a very distinct joy from watching Baxter's struggle to get on his good side.

He's definitely going to have to work harder this time around for that approval rating, though. After Step 3, Baxter's popularity score plummeted into the negatives amongst Ai's family and friends 😂 I'm sure he appreciates that she's still got a positive opinion of him, but I'm also sure he probably thinks her regard is severely misplaced!

What can she do 🤷‍♂️ the girl just loves who she loves, okay?

Anyways, I imagine this moment is not too long after the Step 4 confession. Terry and Miranda may have saved Baxter from a bruised jaw, sure, but certainly not a bruised ego LOL

Game: Dragon Age Origins Characters: Male!Mahariel x Zevran Arainai

Here's our next piece for @theocxcanonweek

For those who have played Origins or at least are familiar enough with the story - this scene would take place shortly after the Sacred Ashes mission.

To answer: Yes, Thy desecrated the ashes and yes, Leliana was there. Unfortunately for her, so were his two most loyal companions, Sten and Zevran.

Now, for a little added context here: My first play experience with Origins was honestly vastly different from many other players that I've met, to the point that I was starting to feel a little insane whenever I talked to them about it. However, I was very recently vindicated by my brother who confirmed that - because our version of DAO was the first disk release back in the early days, our game was full of glitches, and so our playing experience was completely different.

Thy here is the character I played on that first release. As such, my memories of when and how certain things happened isn't at all consistent to what other people believe is the only way the game can be played. Zevran's earring, for example, being available to me far earlier than it currently is. In fact, Zevran's whole romance in my first playthrough with him was completely glitched.

But, it lead to a lot of amazing moments, made the romance a lot more tragically sweet. I've never had a version of Zevran where he was so unconditionally committed as he was in this playthrough with Thy and it forever cemented him as one of my most favourite characters because of it.

AT LAST!!! [insert elmo fire emoji]

The last prompt for @theocxcanonweek is finally done!!!

Game: Our Life: Beginnings & Always Characters: China Schuyler x Baxter Ward

✨ Bonus Drawing Video! ✨

So, the 'jewels and chains' aspect of this prompt is a bit more figurative - as these are both people who have to do a lot of growth and healing from their pasts and, in doing so, find out the true value of themselves to the people who so dearly love them.

I honestly, genuinely, really love the idea of the struggle that is this relationship. I love the idea that, sometimes, things aren't perfect and sometimes it really is just a fight to hold on and keep pushing through the same old problems again and again. Because people don't just magically get better, y'know? Bad habits and hurt feelings don't all just go away once you've decided to start living better. If it were that easy, then the world would be more happy than it is.

No, real relationships take time and patience and work. That's why it's called a commitment. And that commitment is always going to be tested, and a true sign of love is staying even when things get hard. It's saying "If I'm worthy of being loved, then so are you."

I think it's a lesson Baxter is going to have to learn and relearn for quite some time, honestly. Especially with Ai, who has always put her needs last and is now forced to confront them and voice them whenever Baxter, once again, pulls too far away from her. Baxter will have to learn that, for all that Ai is his biggest support - she is also a lot more fragile then she lets on. That no matter how much she loves him or forgives him, she's still hurt, and her healing is still happening.

I just think that the first couple years with these two would be a fairly hard road to travel. A rocky trek rather than a stroll in the park, you could say. They're going to get a few scuffs, there will be rough moments ahead and they may fall sometimes or even stray. However, they've always got each other's back. They'll never move on without the other's hand in theirs - and they'll always come back for each other when they trip along the way.

I wasn't actually going to do day 3 because I couldn't come up with an idea that didn't have Cove in the spotlight 😂 but inspiration hit me at the last minute so this one was a bit of a rush job, my apologies. On the plus side, Ai's little sailor onsie will forever give me life so that was a delight to work on. She had huge aspirations to become one when she was a kid - always wanted to be on a ship and had a lot of sailor themed things in her room (even tried to stow away on a ship once and actually succeeded, but only for a day before someone found her out LOL, the moms were not pleased). As you can guess though, meeting Mr. Shark-man Holden and his sea themed son was the highlight of her youth 🤣 she's had many long and very serious conversations with Cliff about buying a boat. She used her serious voice and her serious face and everything! Cliff could barely resist! He almost caved when Cove came in for back up but the moms brought up the stow away story and that sobered him up pretty damn quick LMAO Now, on a more personal moment here. My stepdad likes to retell this story of how we first met, whenever he's in an emotional enough mood 😂 I was a very impulsive kid (putting it mildly) and I didn't know him at all but, despite that, the first thing I did was run right up to him and hug him around the legs and say "Hello!" with my big smile and he had no idea what to do because he was used to people not being like that with him at all. Yet there I was, already liking him, not knowing how big of an impact that was going to have on him. He retells this story maybe once or twice a year and there's just something so genuinely soft and sweet about watching a 50 odd year old man still get moved to tears, years later, as he says "You chose me." like it still baffles him even now - especially when you know he's the type of man that doesn't rely on support or comfort from other people, but takes that comfort from you - the child he chose too.

Cliff feels like he's that type of man to me, tbh 💖 Maybe it's because I understand his background so easily or because he's always doing things that I recognise as responses to that background, but he reminds me a lot of my stepdad and a lot of myself too honestly. So, a big big Big part of me just loves the idea of this stubborn, independent, self made man who is always putting the comfort and happiness of others as his top priority also getting so damn emotional when he gets to sit down and do normal happy family things with the kids that love him so dearly as well. Like, I just want this man to look around at the people in his life and know, deep in his heart and soul, that they want him to be there 🥺 maybe his parents didn't, but they just missed out on everything that he had to offer honestly. The family he has now knows his value and it's not in what he's willing to do, but simply in him being who he is. That's worthy of love.

(lowkey, I deleted my first draft with all my pretty words about these two on it and I am so sad about that, but let's hope round two can be as equally inspired)

Anyways! Here's the next piece for @theocxcanonweek

Game: Our Life: Beginnings & Always Characters: Kitt'n x Cliff Holden

So, remember back in this post when I said I had only put Rain in the game so his mother could romance Cliff? Well, this is her!

Kitt'n is a very sweet and gentle soul. She's kindhearted and accepting, always willing to put the effort in to support others, work hard and help out. She's a very warm and free spirit with a lot more life experience than any person would expect on first glance.

She also comes from a very checkered past, filled with personal traumas and all the trials and tribulations that go along with digging herself out of that deep a hole. Through the worst of her struggles, her son Rain has been her greatest guiding light.

So when Cliff comes into town, a single father with a wild son, Kitt'n is quick to empathize with him and offer her support. Their situations being as similar as they are different - as Rain's father was simply never in the picture in the first place, and Kitt'n has never fully recovered from that loss.

As such, they start out purely as friends. Neither one is interested in anything more than loving and supporting their child - it brings a sort of closeness to their relationship that has them relying on one another the most. Kitt'n is only a year older than Cliff as well, and so they often find themselves coming to each other for understanding and comfort more than anyone else.

It isn't until the end of Step 2 that the two of them finally start letting themselves look at one another as something more. Having not realised up to that point that, in the five years of knowing each other, they may have started to feel love for the other. It's only thanks to Kyra's outside perspective and blessings that they realise they can have and be more with the other.

Here's our first piece for @theocxcanonweek!

Game: Our Life: Now and Forever Characters: MC (Michael) x Baxter Ward

So, context: Micha doesn't do well in the snow, he goes hypothermic pretty dang quickly and prolonged exposure will lead to hospitalization. So, when Michael disappears mid winter and no one can find him? Well, then search parties are clearly in order.

Of course, Baxter finds him, since he had the best guess as to where Michael likely ran off to. Mainly because it was his damn fault Micha ran off in the first place.

Now, added headcanon context: Anyone familiar with this blog knows I simply love and adore Baxter, and so there was no damn way I could play another game with him in it without putting some kind of focus on him honestly 😂 So, despite not actually knowing anything about the later steps yet (since they're still in development) I have already built and rebuilt the relationship these two would likely have over and over and over again in my head already.

Honestly, I jump back and forth between the relationship being platonic or romantic - since Ai eventually ends up with Baxter and Michael has Qiu and Tama in the rings. I really do love them having an ambiguously close connection to one another though and, of course, I love the added drama and tensions it adds to their inevitable future. Especially with Micha's abandonment issues and Baxter's flighty nature.

They love each other, but they never really pick out exactly what kind of love that is. Eventually, they don't get a chance to, but for this moment right here? It's what drives them both from and towards one another - again and again and again.