#batman#bruce wayne#batfam#dick grayson#tim drake#batfamily#dc fanart
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imagine if people actually took romantic consent seriously. wouldn't it be fucking awesome. i know they never will, but just. take a moment and imagine it with me
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the reason why i think so many alloromantic people outright refuse the idea of "aromantic subtext" being a legitimate thing is that people view aromanticism as inherently shallow. to a lot of queer fandomites, "aromantic" is what they make the side character they don't really care about, so they don't have to bother coming up with actual analysis of their interpersonal relationships. it sucks, because aromantic narratives in fiction, intentional or otherwise, are worth exploring, analysing, and appreciating.
by the way, if you're weird about aromantic heterosexual cisgender men, i kill you. if that man wants a purely sexual relationship with a woman and communicates that with her, and she agrees, hell yes. good for them. you have no right to be a bitch about that. that's frankly none of your god damn business. he's not "emotionally abusive" for wanting a specific type of relationship. you're being stupid and weird. and weirdly misogynistic, by assuming that women are inherently these helpless victims that have no agency or autonomy.
you're literally being the "the myth of consensual sex" meme when you talk shit about cishet aro men in purely sexual relationships with women.
ok it's time to get controversial and brave again. i genuinely believe that tropes like characters getting set up on dates by their friends without their knowledge, fake dating where one party is hesitant or outright opposed but eventually catches feelings, the same except it's "friends with benefits to lovers" etc. should be considered (and labelled as) a form of dubious consent. completely okay to explore in fiction, HIGHLY questionable and often morally fucked to try and do in real life. "character a thinks they don't like character b but after being forced to spend time with them they catch feelings" should be considered on the same level of dubious consent as "character a thinks they don't want to have sex with character b but after getting coerced into it, they end up enjoying it". something that should ONLY happen in the realm of fiction, and when possible, should be EXPLICITLY LABELLED AS DUBIOUS CONSENT.
i get why sexual consent is always on the forefront of people's minds, i get that on some levels it IS more serious than romantic consent (i.e. having something physically done to you as opposed to being forced into something socially), but it honestly pisses me off that romantic harassment and coercion is treated as a cute trope and not like. a serious topic that, if explored in fiction, needs to be tagged properly. i'm tired of reading fics with what, to me, very clearly reads as dubcon or even non-con romance, and then not having the author tag it as that at all, acting like it's a light and fun topic and not something that can leave a person in real life with life long trauma.
at some point, we're really gonna have to start talking about how popular queer media correlates wanting sex with no strings attached with traits like being manipulative, exploitative, abusive, or even predatory. because queer media can talk big game about how aromanticism is cool and valid, but they still turn around and make the antagonist someone who doesn't want a relationship. you support us in name only, you don't wanna give a second's thought to the actual experiences of aromantics. "oh, but this character isn't aromantic!! they're just afraid of commitment!!!" do you have any idea how often actual aromantics are told that shit.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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the things alloromantics consider "more than platonic" never cease to baffle me. cuddling? sleeping next to each other? petting each others' hair? kissing? telling each other how much you mean to each other? why WOULDN'T you do these things with your friends. why DO you need to be romantically attracted to someone in order to express your affection for them.
i guess all these things feel obviously platonic to me, because i've had my friends since we were all mentally ill autistic teenagers, but it feels absurd that some people think anything beyond a hug is automatically romantic. acts of affection and their intentions are defined by the people involved, nobody else. and frankly, some of you don't know how wonderful it is, to be a sleepy aromantic embraced on all sides by a group of people you'd trust your life with.
on the topic of romantic consent. people saying “oh you like them don’t you” or just insisting you have romantic feelings for someone, I feel that breaches romantic consent. it especially sucks because if you say “no I don’t like them” people treat that as confirmation that you actually do and they try to force you into it. imagine doing that with sex. that’d be so fucked up. but since it’s romance it doesn’t matter, apparently
!!!!! EXACTLY
there's so many posts on this site along the lines of that one "the only viable option left is to elope with a tumblr mutual" post, and i just feel like it's my sworn duty and passion in life to remind you all that there is ALWAYS, always another option: staying single. fucking your friends. hanging out with random people with no intention of establishing a romantic connection with any of them. or just hanging out by yourself, finding a hobby you enjoy more than you ever enjoyed dating.
if it feels like the world of romance has nothing left to offer you, leave it behind!
