Mar 19
March Of Robots 2026
Day 19: Vlad
Check out my patreon, my friends gofundme, and my commissions all here!
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March Of Robots 2026
Day 19: Vlad
Check out my patreon, my friends gofundme, and my commissions all here!
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
It's been way too long since I made one of these. I, Vex Lancerfunny, have not actually been bringing the Lancerfunnies. Today, I correct this.
Behold: SPEED.
Harrison Armory: None shall stand in the path of the marching flame. All will bow before our might in awe or lay crushed bellow our boot. Glory to Harrison!
Smith-Shimano: Speed. Grace. Precision. To advance- to hone the cutting edge- is more than just a drive, it’s transcendence. Man is divine, and his chariot is wreathed in gold and steel.
HORUS: Something stirs in the depths of the machine vast and unfathomable. It sings sweet promises to the mad and promises dominion to those unshackled by the chains of reality. Break free. Know the unknowable.
IPS-N:
Big Manufacturers and their associated Handlers
Smith-Shimano Corporation
Violence is an art and anyone can be an artist. Using this pedestrian-level analogy, you can get a pretty good idea of how a Smith-Shimano Handler will treat you. They will tell you that you have potential. Acquire enough real combat experience and hours in repeated simulations and you could rise from a mere practitioner to a virtuoso. One who decides the tempo of battle and the trends of war. But let's not get too far ahead. You will need unfaultering discipline to address the flaws, both blatant and obscured, within you. And only your SSC Handler can give you that.
Harrison Armory
On paper you almost look like a good investment. You've exhibited some interesting behavior on and off the battlefield. You test well with key target demographics that the Armory is engaging with. ... Look, this is about what your Armory Handler is going to do for you. They are going to get you the mercenary contracts that will make you look heroic. Then they are going to put you in front of omninet cameras that will make you seem relatable. Between the PR and military campaigns, you'll become a figurehead, with depth. And if you fuck that up... well it depends on the severity.
IPS-N
Whatever you need to operate in a war fighting capacity, your InterPlanetaryShipping-Northstar Handler will do their best to provide. They've done and seen it all, not much frightens them. Got some mental problems? They set you up an appointment with Jimmy, he's a licensed therapist and psychiatrist, good listener, straight talker. Weird tech issues with your mech? This is Jill, she's good with hardware, software, and even paracausal materials. A date? Sorry that's a violation of professional standards. However you are invited to your Handler's family friday evening potluck. Don't die on the battlefield until you've had their synth-printed carne asada, that's an order.
H0RUS
Puppy? Handler-Mommy's gonna be real with you. She thought she had signed up for a very elaborate cosmic horror kink session with a mysterious client. Instead she somehow wound up in this active war zone with you. And she doesn't know how that happened and Something Is Wrong. Regardless, Handler-Mommy didn't get this far in her life without picking up a lot of weird yet useful skills. So she's going to do her best for you, her little attack dog. And You are going to kill everything in mommy's way. Can you do that Puppy? Can you kill for Mommy?
Recently finished commission for @bmn82.
Two miniguns, plate shield legs, and a one-word answer to most problems - "Bullets".
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
"After any attack with this weapon, you may smack an adjacent character with the butt end"
A rather concerning point made by some of our senior staff (Underbaron Iphianassa), perhaps it should be investigated?