Title: July Updates Because My Life Is A Lot
So. Several things happened over the past few days and I need to document them for posterity because my life is genuinely something else.
July 5th — The Cucumber Incident
Apparently I cannot be trusted to eat a cucumber correctly. According to my grandma, I must cut it into small pieces instead of eating it like a normal human person, I must chew properly, and I must — and I cannot stress this enough — eat beautifully. Like a princess. Her words.
When I pointed out that I'm not a princess, she informed me that I am in fact a princess and must conduct myself accordingly at mealtimes. I also don't burp at the table or put my feet up, so by any normal 2026 American standard I eat completely fine, but apparently that's not the point. The point is beauty. And elegance. And tiny cucumber pieces.
She also complained to my dad about it. Because apparently my cucumber chewing habits are worth escalating to upper management.
July 6th — The Headache
Woke up with a genuinely painful headache. Grandma's diagnosis? Too much time on her phone and my laptop. Not "are you okay." Not "do you need anything." Straight to technology blame without passing go.
Turns out it was probably a sinus headache from congestion. Blew my nose, headache mostly went away. No screen time involved in the cause or the cure. Shocking.
July 7th — The Intercom Situation
So there was a past incident where I accidentally let a stranger into the building by pushing the intercom button without checking who it was first. Dad got mad. I promised never to open it again without knowing who it was.
Today the intercom buzzed. I followed my promise and didn't open it. Turns out it was dad. He got mad.
His argument: "I only meant don't open it for strangers." My argument: HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW IT WASN'T A STRANGER?? There is no camera. There is no way to verify who is outside without using the speak button, which he never told me to use, and which I don't normally use. I followed the rule he gave me. The rule he gave me was incomplete. This is not my fault.
He yelled. The lady told him to stop yelling. He stopped.
The lady gets a W. Dad gets an L. I thanked her afterward and told her I'm sensitive to yelling and she said "you're welcome" like a normal person. Character development is real and it's happening in this household apparently.
He also threatened to take my key so I'd have to wait outside for hours. In July. In New York. Where it is currently purgatory levels of hot and thunderstorms happen regularly. Great plan.
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And if you translated that — honestly I'd rather you didn't, because I genuinely don't know how you're going to react and that scares me a little. But I also know curiosity wins sometimes and some of you are going to do it anyway, and that's okay. Just please don't send me panic messages. Don't tell me I need to get help immediately. Don't treat me like I'm fragile or broken or like every word I say from now on needs to be handled carefully. Don't ghost me because it got too heavy. Just talk to me the same way you always have — like a person, not a crisis. That's genuinely all I'm asking.
P.S. — There's also a partial personal reason behind the "please don't ghost me" thing. A mutual of mine on Discord hasn't responded to me in 7 days for reasons I genuinely don't know, and it has nothing to do with what's in the morse code — they don't even know about any of this. But it's a reminder of how much ghosting hurts even when it's probably not intentional. I don't want people disappearing on me because things got heavy. I don't want friendships put on pause until I "get better." I don't want to be pushed toward things that will make everything worse under the guise of helping. I just want people to stay. That's it. Just stay.
And if you want to DM me after reading this, you're more than welcome to. But if I don't respond right away, please don't panic — I'm probably in class, busy, sleeping, or just existing somewhere without access to my laptop. It doesn't mean anything bad happened. I promise.
Tagging my moots...: @ruinationz and @turbotasticnumberone and @cartoon-cat7241 and @seleyaaaa and @sssanga and @strayfelinez and @yukihirop and @rivertheemoo and @meatmedallion and @drownedsilverforever and @senpaipaws and @cartoonlover999 and @byronicmoron and @crowtheorie and @human-n0-l0ng3r and @rotibakarstuff and @glooberousgoon and @goddess-of-lov3 and @lucifersdog-luci and @aoihibiki247 and @klyju and @ace-productions7 and @fiberopticemoweeb666 and @cryptedlullaby and @3veryth1ngstays and @blossomletters and @sapphicavocado and @bloodybigirland @yanderehiro and @dnplicoricenutttt and @2catnip4me and @miracle-winkel and @mickyx-x and @biblicallyunhingedtheo and @the-only-good-ai and @prettirei and @unhinged-pink-espresso and @patchofglass and @m0nstrsk8bri and @ghostie-bunni and @nocthour and @ohthisisanna and @evergardenwall and @ladylrbloom and @themermaidavenger and @the-eclipse-is-in-me and @fannishwitch and @sleepyblogthingand @spookysimsspookythings and @sherotopia and @thekittykiller and @kindlykittie and @goldensnowspiderand @sulmii and @abeelarts and @talapride and @anneswritingnook and @funkydeathmdnss and @taliasims5 and @ieatrocks0912 and @rei-ayasaki and @jaq-of-hearts and @higuysetc and @thef-150 and @scaliedog and @everheardofaboondoggle and @dianaforever and @candy-floss-consumer and @zrofor09 and @writer-fennec and @harthue and @velvet-ruin and @hvybrth and @nights-like-this17 and @stilesispackmomof-thehalepack and @sapphicluma and @avery-is-sleepy and @aphexpuppy-x0x and @quietlychaotic13 and @rin-rineya and @secreteldritchhorror and @ladykillerzsstuff and @cruvlllsworld and @the-only-good-ai and @c1el-phantomh1ve and @striving4mikey and @yukihirop-is-prussia and @deadmegime and @miraculousadrienettemarichat and @agra-absurdis and @kopickoncave and @billy-bob-xiv and @foxunikilo and @nightmarezs and @leafgreen222 and @marshme110w and @niyahbabes and @marshme110w and @allie-ever-posting and @xd3ardiaryxx and @garciaswife and @gothygardner and @expensiveprincessofherself and @ask-zhe-awesome-prussia and @ac1dbvnny and @pookieadriana16 and @jett-blasts-0ff and @d3adbydawnmari0 and @slain-angel-broken-wings and @l1ly0fth3va113y and @silentthillsz and @a4a-x and @ask-aph-prussia-and-yukihirop and @pinkswirlybubbles and @allndverse and @hop2fuldream3r and @sinful-snaps234 and @br3ns1lly and @m1sssaint and @macaquewifey and @craigburnsall and @roxyyyyyyyy and @kennieluvzvox and @nothingness–isdead and @sjsroom and @skinwalkerbunny and @wolf-lavender and @petrichoreghost and @urlocalengene and @mraltruist and @absvored and @h0pl3ss-dr34m3r
