#institutionalized ableism

Ceramic plates being the most commonly found even though they make loud noises when you stack them/put them away no matter how careful you are

Stoves and timers that only have a "loud and shrill as fuck" setting. (I'm sitting right here with no other sounds. You don't have to yell)

The fact that one of the largest fines as a driver in Chicago comes from being even a day late on getting an updated city sticker for your car.

This is the first I’m hearing of it, because previously what I heard was some people saying that Asperger’s being absorbed into “Autism Spectrum Disorders” was a good thing because it meant more people were realizing that it was all part of the same spectrum instead of two separate or semi-separate things, with some people complaining about “but how will we differentiate between more and less ‘severe’ cases.” But this is also my first class on diagnosis/DSM stuff, so it’s possible there was stuff that happened which I didn’t know about?

And of course, I can’t ask the professor because when I did she just wanted to talk about the flipping parents who are “angry” or whatever and not the actual people who are potentially losing their diagnosis? And the other professor won’t give me a real answer because he loves the DSM and questioning anything about it just gets a really big lecture that I can’t make heads or tales of because he’s not actually answering the question and is just going on about the DSM and how sure it has its flaws but it’s the best we have and diagnosis is so important. 

Like yes...this is a question related to diagnosis. But like...my question is more concrete than that?

Basically what I am saying is I am immensely confused at the moment and I was wondering if someone with more knowledge on this subject than me would be able to point me in the right direction?

(Also, if you are autistic and you feel offended by my wording please let me know so I can fix it.)

Literally just let vocational rehab take out my beloved bath tub (and destroy my whole fucking house) for a cheap ass roll in shower that immediately almost killed me. I hope they have a big “I fucked up” budget bc anything they order without my input turns out to be a disaster. This has been happening my whole life and now getting new assistive devices is actually a trigger because it usually doesn’t work, which means I’ll have to deal with everyone being disappointed in me for “being stubborn and refusing to try new things.” Like, I’m autistic, so trying new things is hard enough, and I’m not going to use something that doesn’t work (and probably makes me uncomfortable because it gives me those hospital vibes and I don’t want to relive almost dying every time I look at it) just to make you feel better. Let me help you pick it out if you want me to use it.

But the group presenting ended up presenting on the Temple Grandin movie, and from the clips I saw it seemed like it was surprisingly well done, actually trying to get the viewer to see things how she sees instead of just...whatever those kinds of movies normally do. I especially liked the scene at the party where the person asks her to tell them about her research and so she does, and then they like walk away before she’s finished because holy crap if that isn’t every day or close to it for me.

I didn’t want to be one of the presenters, because I don’t really trust the class enough to present on something I get emotionally invested in just yet, but I did end up participating in the discussion significantly more than I expected to.

The only problem with that is related to the way my internal monologue works. If I hear someone talking for a long period of time, then the way my internal monologue sounds will start to shift in order to mimic that person’s speech patterns, which can sometimes result in my verbal speech taking on elements of other people’s speech patterns, particularly if I was invested in what they were saying or I particularly like the way they talk.

So I worry a little bit because that combined with myself getting excited for the topic resulted in a lot of start-stopping (which is just something that happens if I try to talk before my answer is fully in words) and my inflections going all over the place, and myself talking with my hands a lot more.