Princess Peach: What are your three best qualities?
Mario: I’m cute, I have soft hair, and sometimes I cry because I love my friends.

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Princess Peach: What are your three best qualities?
Mario: I’m cute, I have soft hair, and sometimes I cry because I love my friends.

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Princess Peach: Can I ask you for a favor?
Mario: I would literally die for you, but continue.
Princess Peach: We need to talk about you starting sentences that way.
*Mario is fighting Bowser*
Luigi: Just stay calm! You already have everything you need to beat him!
Mario: The power to believe in myself!?
Luigi: No, a knife! Stab him!
Princess Peach: *yawns*
Mario: Yeah, being that pretty must be tiring.
Princess Peach: Then you must be exhuasted.
Luigi: Will you two shut up? Some of us are lonely.
Princess Peach: So, what is Mario to you?
Luigi: The reason I wake up every morning.
Princess Peach: ...That’s adorable.
Mario earlier that morning, barging into Luigi′s room, smacking pans together: WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP!!!

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Mario: Say no to drugs.
Wario: Say yes to drugs.
Luigi: It doesn't matter if you say yes or no to drugs, cause if you're talking to drugs... then you're on drugs.
Mario: I am 39 cheetos tall.
Luigi: Why... are you measuring your height in cheetos?
Mario: Because we're out of doritos.
Yoshi: What’s up with Mario? He's been laying on the floor for like….an hour now?
Luigi: He's just a little overwhelmed.
Yoshi: Why?
Luigi: Princess Peach smiled at him.