Mabel: “What do you call a person with poor hearing?”
Dipper: “What?”
Mabel: “I SAID, WHAT DO YOU CALL A PERSON WITH POOR HEARING?”
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Mabel: “What do you call a person with poor hearing?”
Dipper: “What?”
Mabel: “I SAID, WHAT DO YOU CALL A PERSON WITH POOR HEARING?”
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Ford being back on Earth after 30 years and having to adjust to all the things that have changed.
~~~
Ford, in the middle of a conversation at Greasy's Diner, pulls out a pack of cigarettes and goes to light one.
Stan: waitwaitwait you can't DO that anymore!!
Ford: Do what?
Stan: smoke indoors. You have to go outside now.
Ford: ???
~~~
Ford and Stan, getting pulled over.
Officer: do you know why I pulled you over?
Ford: is my tail light out?
Officer: No, you're not wearing your seatbelt! I'm going to issue you a warning.
Stan: I told you it was law now.
~~~
Ford: hey, if you kids are going to town, can I give you money and a note to grab me some beer? You can use the change to get yourselves some snacks.
Dipper and Mabel: ... No.
Stan: You can't send kids to get smokes or booze anymore. They won't sell to em.
~~~
Ford: why did you have my insulation re-done? It was fine!!
Stan: it was Asbestos!!
Ford: yeah!
Stan: it causes cancer!!
Ford: wait what?!?!
~~~
Stan and Ford, discussing where to go next on their travels.
Ford: I'd like to see the Berlin Wall.
Stan: 😬 about that...
~~~
Ford: what do you MEAN you can't smoke in the car anymore?!
Stan: you can smoke in the car, just not with the kids.
Ford: can't smoke in restaurants, can't smoke in the car, what next, can't smoke at work?
Stan: you can smoke at work, you just have to go outside, you can't smoke in commercial buildings anymore.
Ford, slamming his hands on the table: This is bullshit!
~~~
Ford: why can't the kids bring peanut butter to school anymore?
Stan: *deep suffering sigh*
~~~
Ford: Can you believe they made a Lord of the Rings movie?
Stan: they made several Lord of the Rings movies
Ford: 🤩🤩
~~~
Ford: Stan! STAN! They made more Star Trek series!
Stan: They made more Star Wars movies too.
Ford: 🤩🤩
Dipper: don't get too excited, most of them suck
Ford about the memory gun: Do you really think that's a healthy coping mechanism?
Fiddleford: Oh not at all! Thanks for asking :)
Stan: “Ok, what lesson did we all learn here?”
Mabel: “Ummm, respect your elders?”
Stan: “what? No. Ew,”
"Swiggity swooty, I'm coming for that booty."
Timmy Turner to Mabel Pines
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Greg: (playing with Mabel's doll) "Uh, how you doin'?" Mabel: Greg, say it in your girl voice! Why can't I have to keep asking you? Greg: (to Dipper, who's recording) Look away, please. (turns back) "hOw Ya dOiN'?" Dipper: (proceeds to lose it)
Ford: We're going to win this, because we have something Bill and his gang don't. [points to his chest]
Stan: What, heart?
Ford: No, me. I'm pointing at myself.
Bill Cipher : I think I mostly want to see what happens when this whole place breaks apart.