#im moving

skitters around..... suspicious like.........

God could you IMAGINE having to live in Hawkmoth's Paris? Your weird aunt brings her grape, pickle and mayonnaise gelatin delight to Thanksgiving and you have to choke that shit down bc if you don't she'll get sad and you risk her turning into Jello Queen who turns buildings and people into gelatin monstrosities? Some creep at the bar wants your number so you give him a fake and when he tries it and it fails he gets pissed and becomes Great Chad who storms around Paris giving everyone he touches a hangover and bad taste in music? You have to walk on eggshells around everyone while trying to maintain some semblance of inner peace so you don't become Human Resource, who goes around telling everyone what their coworkers really think of them and writing people up so they follow your will. Meanwhile you've died 7 times and been erased from existence twice because of the bitchy teen daughter of the mayor intentionally antagonizing everyone she comes in contact with. You see Sheryl from accounting spill her coffee on her new white suede jacket and just silently check your email to make sure your lawyer approved your latest update to your will in case this is the day those two high school vigilantes get their ass handed to them for real. I'd move.