#highschoolcrush

Araya you are so spoiled~ heh

This scene kinda remind me of a kdrama i watched years ago where the guy refused to let go of her hand too haha...

Again Araya..haha but awww he's the sweetest and damn adorable! He makes me want to spoil him rotten! Hahaha

But when Araya said...

She still is in great shape. We were hanging at a bar near home having a couple drinks and reminiscing. I told her about how us boys would all talk about how we'd fantasize about her and that skirt. She admitted to me that she would go home some days and strip down and masturbate on the couch thinking of some of us boys that were 18 and how she would love to be fucked hard by us.

It must have excited her because I felt her hand caressing my cock through my jeans. "Some of you are handsome now." She guided my hand up her thigh and to her pussy. She was quite wet and she gasped a little when I touched her. For the next 10 minutes it looked like we were talking above the table but below we were masterbating each other to an orgasm.

I want to ask some questions about some things. Tbh I felt guilty for throwing away my feelings for my crush on middle school.

I have a crush on my 9th grade days and now I'm already in my 12th grade in school and I still feel something for him, I know it's hard because we're both guys, and I have lingering feelings for him. Though I tried to do anything to avoid it, I felt guilty at the end. The boy I had a crush on is the clingy type haha, he approached me first, clinged to me first and then I felt something different from him. At first I didn't mind it then time came by and some questions came to my mind "is it love? " " Is it admiration?" or is it just a hint of fondness towards him?, I tried everything to erase that feeling, to forget that feeling, I tried using someone as a scapegoat, I pretend that I like that certain guy so that my crush would distance his self towards me, but that didn't work it only makes the situation worse, one-time we had long chat on messenger with my crush, then a sudden boredom stroke me and got curious, my mind ran through the room and decided to do it, I deleted all my conversation I had with him and after that he gone cold towards me, it feels like a stranger is looking at me, yet I am the stranger in his perspective. After that he no longer gives attention to me, at first I feel relieved because it finally comes to an end, since that boy I had feelings for is my friend's crush, my friend's ex-boyfriend, so I feel relieved. But after the days and months pass I feel a little guilty for avoiding those light stares, the feeling that someone is looking at you with love. And now I have become one of his most hated individuals haha. Now I'm still stuck in these questions, the questions that are filled with guilt

"what if I didn't avoid the fact that I have feelings for him?"

"what if I didn't delete all my convos with him?"

"what if I didn't let him go just because my friend likes him too? "

"What if it's just a ploy, do I still have to feel guilty? "

"Why do I feel the guilt more than my feelings towards him?"