#hereswhy

A NON-VIRAL CONTENT CAN STILL BECOME a BIG WINNER!

In this week’s episode of Here’s Why: https://youtu.be/oJlmFfQX_7w?list=PLOMg7VD8V2Po6ifHlR5rMFn-dq0ZaJSzY , Mark and Eric explaine why authoritative, quality content can become very valuable to your brand, even if it doesn’t go viral.. It can turn out to be sleeping success stories..

Content marketing is about, over filling your Business sites with valuble and relevant content.. “Home made”…

10/12/14

  Today on my way to Grand Central an older man came up to me while I was waiting for the 2.  He mentioned that he had seen me on the bus and I confirmed that.  He continued to talk to me, asking me questions about where I lived, commenting how he thought I was so beautiful when he first saw me, in fact he made sure to compliment me multiple times on my looks (“you’re so fucking beautiful”, etc) despite my awkwardness during the interaction.  He proceeded to follow me on the train, even mentioned later that he got off the 1 specifically to follow me and talk to me; he had no other reason for switching trains.  While on the train he stood very close and kept leaning in to further close that distance, I found myself trying to shift myself away incognito.  We had an awkward chat just about him, me stressing that I just wanted to get on my train, him telling me that I’m beautiful.  At one point he took my hand to try and hold it, I told him I wasn’t comfortable with it and I’m pretty sure he was going to try to kiss me on the train.  When I finally got off, he followed me off and all the way to the Times Square shuttle.  Again, he stood close, said “I think we look good together, what do you think”, kept saying that I should call him, etc., and I kept saying that I just wanted to get on my train and that I didn’t know him well enough and had to think about it.  At one point I asked him, “what if we didn’t agree on anything?  What if you didn’t actually like me?” (I have a feeling we wouldn’t agree on many things).  He insisted that was why he wanted to take me out and have a good time, alluding to us going out as we might be friends but most likely end up in a relationship.  He said that physically he was interested/attracted and that seemed to be a good enough explanation that we would get along.  He asked if he could touch my hair.  This is the first time I have ever felt uncomfortable with the idea of someone touching my hair or asking me if they could and I realized that it is because his wanting to touch my hair was an act of voyeurism and ownership over my body.  As I left, he hugged me twice and kissed me on the cheek twice (and would have kissed me on the lips had I not pulled away).

This is an example of a seemingly benign encounter that holds the subtext of male dominance over an interaction.  While he probably felt that he was being smooth, charming, and simply complementing me by telling me how beautiful he thought I was and how he was interested in having a relationship with me, the idea that I had no desire to engage with him did not cross his mind once.  I was not overtly rude, I was fairly polite, but my body language was fairly tense, I avoided eye contact, leaned away from him, and dropped other hints that I wasn’t ok with how our interaction was going (“That makes me uncomfortable”, “I don’t know you well enough”, “I just want to get to my train”, “I’m a student, I’m very busy”).  If I had explicitly said “No”, would he have disengaged?  Would he then just have labeled me as an ungrateful bitch for not taking a compliment?  To me, situations like this are difficult to navigate because I understand that in some form he has good intentions; he thinks I’m attractive and is taking a risk to tell me and get to know me better.  While I think there is nothing wrong with that and respect people who do take such risks (sometimes I’m even flattered), it is the unspoken conversation between us that makes this encounter problematic.  Despite his ardent interest in me, he never actually took my feelings into account and consider that I didn’t want to be touched or that I think it’s total bullshit that you think I’ll want to have sex with you because you said you find me attractive.  He was not terribly rude and I did not want to be rude either.  I feel us women commonly find ourselves in uncomfortable situations as these where we do not want to be outright rude, because rudeness would be undeserved, but it is annoying and we do not have the safety or space to express our discomfort or annoyance because even that would be seen as “cold” or “ungrateful”.  Another part of it is my own fear of saying no to someone, particularly a man.  I work to break myself of this fear, but still find it difficult to not protect a man’s feelings at the expense of my own.  Underneath wanting to protect his feelings, there is also the fear of how he will react if I explicitly deny him.  I didn’t particularly feel in danger, but there is always that fear, that slight chance, that he might lash out against me, physically or verbally and I simply don’t know.  Knowing the entitlement that many men feel over women, that this man expressed over my personal space and body, how do I know he won’t react violently towards my rejection?