#her sun

The sun had been watching over the entire earth for far too long to remember. Its role was unique: to warm people’s bodies and hearts, as well as enlighten this world. The sun was loved by many, and it rewarded this affection by shining even more brightly day by day. The sun cared for everyone on earth, and made no distinction between human beings. From little children to elderly people, the sun considered each human being as equally important.

Until now, the sun had always watched over the earth without making any distinction but this particular day of July 27, a girl unexpectedly managed to catch its attention.

It was her cheerful laugh that attracted the sun to that particular girl that day in Nagoya. The girl had black, shoulder-length hair, and was wearing a high school uniform: a white shirt closed by a blue ribbon around her neck, along with a grey and white checked skirt. She was chatting eagerly with her group of friends as they were heading back home after finishing school. That girl who was standing in the middle of the group was the center of attention: all the other girls were listening to her in great interest.

She was one of the popular girls, the sun guessed as it followed the group of girls in curiosity, its attention always set on the one at the center. She harbored such a bright smile and looked so happy, that it prompted the sun to shine a little more brightly over the group of friends.

The girl who was chatting with so much enthusiasm with her friends suddenly stopped walking, and looked up to the sky. The sun gazed at her in curiosity, just like every other girl in the group who was wondering why their leader had not only stopped talking, but also stopped walking altogether.

The sun knew the girl was only looking in the direction of the sky, but for a minute it strangely looked like she was looking straight at the sun. The sun brushed it off as a figment of its imagination, and contemplated instead the girl who was smiling, her eyes never leaving the blue sky over her head.

“She’s beautiful,” the sun murmured, admiring the girl’s juvenile face. Because of her athletic body, the sun figured she had to be apart of a sports club. Maybe the running club? The sun didn’t know how long it gazed at the girl, but it suddenly noticed her smile growing larger, her eyes widening slightly as she was still looking at the sky intently.

“You’re beautiful too,” the words left the girl’s lips.

The sun stared speechless at the girl who was grinning back at the sky, before turning on her heels to join again her group of friends who were waiting for her.

The sun followed the group of friends as it resumed its chatting, the words recently uttered by the girl rolling over in its head again and again. What had just happened? Had the girl just heard the sun and… answered?

But it was impossible, the sun kept repeating. No one could hear the sun! No one had ever heard the sun before! It had to be a figment of its imagination, the sun tried to convince itself. Maybe its inner, profound desire to be able to communicate with a human being was playing tricks on its mind. Yes, it could be the only explanation, the sun mused at it followed the girl pensively.

It was getting quite late now, and the sun knew it would soon need to disappear from the sky. Still, the sun kept watching the girl as long as it was allowed. The sun saw the girl parting ways with her friends and waving goodbye at them, before heading towards a quiet neighborhood of Nagoya. The sun followed her until she arrived in front of a house, and opened the front gate to enter.

The sun couldn’t help but feel a bit sad as it realized its short, but memorable encounter with the girl was about to come to an end. Somehow, the sun wished it could see this girl tomorrow again.

However, the sun knew it wasn’t reasonable to give in to its selfish desires. Its role was to enlighten the whole world. Its attention couldn’t possibly be set on one person in particular. Otherwise, it could get distracted, and forget about the other human beings that populated the earth.

The sun made up its decision, and gazed sadly one last time at the girl. “Farewell, Jurina,” the sun whispered softly to the girl who was about to enter her house. It was almost sundown now, but the sun wanted to take advantage of the last seconds to look at the girl one last time. All of a sudden, the girl turned around, a bright smile plastered on her face. “See you tomorrow, beautiful sun.”

The sun didn’t have time to react that the girl had already turned the handle of the door, and entered the house. The sun’s resolution to forget about that girl and move on went through the window after realizing the girl could truly hear it. The sun had no idea how such miracle was possible, but it simply knew it couldn’t leave the girl’s side anymore after this shocking revelation.

   The next day, the sun was ready to welcome the high school student as soon as she stepped outside her house. The sun found itself happy to see her, and embraced her warmly when she looked up to the sky and smiled. The sun followed her silently as she headed towards school, and met her group of friends on the way. The sun wished it could keep on watching over her all day long, but it was unfortunately impossible during classes.

During those times, the sun found itself missing the girl, impatient to be reunited with her to be able to shine upon her head again. The sun’s wish was finally granted when the girl’s last class ended, and she left school. The sun followed her as silently as usual, watching her carefully as she was surrounded again by her group of friends. It amazed the sun that the girl was always the center of attention, all pair of eyes glued on her when she opened her mouth to speak.

Jurina was a very talkative girl, the sun quickly discovered. And enjoyed very much the congratulations she would receive each time she made a pun. Jurina loved making puns; that was another characteristic the sun couldn’t possibly miss about the girl, considering how many puns she made per day. The sun had to admit it sometimes needed a few seconds to fully understand Jurina’s puns. However, it always ended up being very impressed by how elaborate her puns were. And she was able to come up with a new pun so fast and effortlessly! The girl had a swift mind, the sun couldn’t help but agree.

Jurina had been chatting quite a lot with her friends now, when she suddenly indicated she needed to go somewhere. Judging by the surprised reactions she received, the sun guessed it was quite uncommon for the girl to make a change of plans on her way home. The sun was very curious to discover where the girl wanted to go, and it followed her as she said goodbye to her friends, and walked towards the opposite direction of her house.

The sun followed her as she walked for fifteen, long minutes, until seeing her heading towards the river bank. The girl suddenly stopped and looked around her, looking quite satisfied when there was no one in sight. She placed her school bag on the grass, before laying down and closing her eyes.

The sun wondered what prompted the girl to make a sudden stop here. It was quite far from her home. However, it took advantage of the moment to shine brightly over her unmoving form, noting how the warmth falling on her skin seemed to make her more relaxed and appeased. The sun watched over her for a little while, now understanding the magnetic effect the girl had on people.  

The girl was always very energetic during the day but right now, she looked quiet and peaceful. The girl who had kept her eyes shut since she laid down in the grass suddenly opened them, and the sun couldn’t shake the feeling that she was looking right in its direction.

The sun felt contented just watching the girl, and it certainly didn’t expect to hear the girl’s voice again. “You’re beautiful today again,” the girl stated with a smile. “But maybe a bit too hot.”

“Sorry,” the sun stuttered. Immediately, it shined a little less brightly over the girl’s head, hoping the change would be enough to satisfy her. The pleased expression the sun received in return told it definitely managed to meet the girl’s expectations. Now, the sun was entirely convinced it could communicate with the girl. For an unknown reason, the girl had acquired the capacity to hear its voice. However, the sun didn’t know what to say. Not only this situation was completely new and unforeseen, the sun found itself a bit shy in the presence of the beautiful girl.

A few minutes passed by without any word being exchanged, and the sun saw progressively a frown falling upon the girl’s face. She was still gazing at the sky, but now looked slightly upset. “Why are you not saying anything? I want to hear your voice again.”

The sun heard the request well but didn’t know how to proceed, torn between its wish to engage in a conversation with the girl, and the nagging feeling that this wasn’t right. And there was a question that still was unanswered after yesterday’s astonishing discovery. Why could this girl hear the sun talking? What made her so special?

The sun didn’t know if those questions would ever get an answer, but the now displeased look the girl was sending to the sky didn’t go unnoticed. It appeared Jurina didn’t like the silent treatment she was receiving. The sun was still unsure whether it was the right decision, but it refused to make the girl upset any longer. That’s why it spoke up, albeit a bit hesitantly. “Hello, Jurina.”

The words uttered were nothing but simple, but managed nonetheless to place a smile upon the girl’s lips instantly. “Finally, you’re answering.”

The sun noted the way her smile broadened as sunbeams caressed her skin softly. “I don’t understand why you can hear me,” the sun admitted its confusion. “No one has ever been able to hear me before.”

The girl sat up on the grass, and her face turned serious as she pondered thoughtfully over the sun’s words. “I don’t know either why I can hear you, but I don’t care. You’re beautiful, and you always keep me warm. I want to keep talking to you. Do you have a name?”

“I don’t,” the sun replied, wondering where the girl was getting at.

“Then I’ll give you one!” The girl announced cheerfully. “You have a lovely, feminine voice. I imagine you as a beautiful girl with long, black silky hair and small brown eyes. Your skin is slightly pale, even though you always shine so brightly.”

The sun gazed at the girl in amusement, thinking she surely had quite a lot of imagination. However, it didn’t mind at all that nice description and accepted it willingly.

“What about 'Rena'?” The girl suggested. “Do you like it?”

“Rena?” The sun repeated the foreign name in surprise. Where did this name suddenly come from? Did this name have a particular meaning to the girl? In the end, the sun decided to keep its questions to itself, admitting it liked the way it sounded. “Alright.”

“Great!” Jurina clapped into her hands in joy, before raising her left hand towards the sky. “Nice to meet you, Rena-chan.”

   July 27 marked the beginning of the relationship between the sun and Jurina. Every morning, the sun would accompany the high school student on her way to school and, as soon as classes were over, would follow her on her way back home.

Since that day, Jurina always pretended to have to go somewhere to part earlier with her friends. The other girls always seemed surprised when they saw their friend turning on her heels quickly, but they never questioned Jurina about it. The sun didn’t miss their curious gaze following her – nor the whispers they would exchange – as she drew away in the distance. The third day, the sun was feeling just like Jurina’s friends: it had no idea where the girl was running towards with such enthusiasm.

The sun followed the girl in curiosity, until noticing she was heading towards the river bank again. The place was desert just like the previous day, and Jurina didn’t waste time to leave her school bag aside, and lay down in the grass. The moment after, she looked up to the sky and spoke up. “I missed you during classes, Rena-chan. Did you miss me?”

The sun took in her somewhat mischievous expression, and it laughed softly at her childish behavior. The wind suddenly blew over Jurina’s face, brushing away a few strands of hair. The sun couldn’t help thinking she looked very beautiful today again. It shined a little over Jurina’s lying form carefully, not too much to not incommode her like the other day. Judging by Jurina’s pleased smile forming on her lips, she seemed to enjoy the attention. “I missed you too, Jurina.”

   They spoke every day. As soon as classes ended, Jurina would head towards their spot and engage in a conversation with the sun. Well, it was mostly Jurina speaking at first, as the sun was often too shy to say anything. It felt much more at ease simply listening and observing the other girl.

Not a day passed without Jurina joining her spot by the river to talk with the sun. After three months, the sun was pretty sure it knew everything about the girl. Her friends, her family, her studies. Her dreams and expectations in life. Jurina, the girl who the sun was now very fond of, held no more secrets.

The sun enjoyed their time together more than anything. In fact, as soon as the sun was down, it couldn’t wait to be reunited with Jurina, and listen to her cheerful narration of her day again. However, as time went by, the sun couldn’t help noticing that Jurina was drawing away progressively from her group of friends.

Indeed, Jurina shortened the time she spent with them more and more, in order to be able to have more time to speak with the sun. That’s why, one day, the sun couldn’t help but broach the subject tentatively. “Jurina… maybe you should stop spending so much time with me.”

The sun immediately regretted its words when it saw Jurina taking a seat on the grass, and shooting the sky a very upset look. “Why? Don’t you like me anymore? Am I boring you?”

“Of course not,” the sun reassured her immediately. Jurina was the most interesting human being the sun had ever met. How could she believe she was boring? Those few hours they were able to spend each day together were the best moments of the sun’s day. “But you are spending less time with your friends. I’m sure they are missing you.”

Jurina let out a sigh, and looked down to her feet guiltily. “I have many friends, but I never felt this way with anyone else before,” she admitted, her voice lowering down in a murmur. “You’re the first thing I think about when I wake up in the morning, and the last when I fall asleep. I think… I like you.”

The sun blushed at the admission, and hid carefully being a passing cloud. However, Jurina immediately noticed that the sun was not shining over her anymore, and she looked up to the sky, scared. “Please don’t leave me,” she pleaded to the sun that was still refusing to show itself, “I just can’t help how I feel. We’ve been talking to each other for more than three months. Don’t you like me… just a little?”

“I like you too,” The sun admitted softly, showing itself progressively from behind the cloud that was sheltering it. And not just a little, the sun almost added, realizing how much the girl’s presence was brightening up its day like never before. However, there was one fact the sun couldn’t ignore. The sun was to remain in the sky, unreachable. “But this is impossible.”

“I guess it is,” Jurina murmured after a little while, and the sun didn’t miss the melancholy entering her voice. “I wish I could touch you. Just as you embrace me every day with your warmth.”

“My touch is dangerous,” The sun replied painfully to the girl who was not looking up to the sky anymore. “If you were to touch me, you would burn and die.”

“I-I see,” Jurina stammered, tears sliding down her cheeks silently.

They didn’t speak after that anymore and for the first time since they met, the sun regretted giving in to the temptation of getting to know that girl better, and ever engaging a conversation with her. Its intent had always been to make her happy and keep that bright smile upon her lips. Now, it was doing the exact opposite as it couldn’t possibly meet the girl’s expectations.

Jurina went back home a little after that, and the sun pondered over what to do to comfort the girl who had kept silent on the way home. The sun tried tentatively to shine over her head, but the warmth didn’t have the expected effect as the girl barely reacted and looked as despondent as before.

The sun waited until the girl entered her house, hoping she would turn back to look up to the sky one last time. She didn’t, and the sun watched sadly as the girl closed the door behind her without sharing a single word with the sun as she always used to. The sun knew the girl was upset right now, and it didn’t feel offended in the slightest by the silent treatment it was getting. Jurina would be feeling better the next day, the sun firmly believed as it watched through the window the girl meeting her mother in the living room.

However, the sun couldn’t ignore Jurina’s confession. Her feelings for the sun were genuine, and the sun knew they would only grow stronger if they kept speaking every day as they had done for the last three months. The sun didn’t want to make such a decision; especially when it was conscious it felt the same way for Jurina. However, the sun knew Jurina would hurt even more if they kept interacting. For Jurina’s sake, their precious conversations needed to come to an end.

   The sun still followed the girl and embraced her with its warmth the next day, but it stayed quiet according to the decision it made the evening before. Jurina tried to engage in a conversation again as soon as she left school, but the sun remained silent the whole time. To be honest, it was hard to stuck to such resolution when the sun saw the reaction it provoked. Confusion. Sadness. Despair.

Albeit the fact the girl never received a reply from the sun, she stubbornly kept on talking. The sun never replied once, no matter how painful it was to see the girl looking up to the sky, asking again and again why the sun refused to speak. In the end, the sun’s efforts to remain silent paid off.

One day, after weeks of trying, Jurina stopped going by the river bank. Her friends seemed surprised when she didn’t excuse herself to leave the group as she had been doing for months. The sun looked painfully at the girl who had lost all her cheerfulness. A few of Jurina’s friends were trying to talk with her, but the girl was barely listening and reacting to the attention.

It was unbearable for the sun to see the girl in such a devastated state, and at one point the sun almost gave in, pondering answering to the girl again just to finally see the light back in her eyes. However, it refrained itself at the last minute, realizing it would be counterproductive. The sun never wished to distance itself from the girl, but it had no other choice. Jurina was asking something the sun couldn’t provide. This relationship had no future, so it was best to say goodbye before it was too late.

That day, the sun decided it would also stop following Jurina altogether. It was so painful to witness the girl’s sorrow on a daily basis; the sun couldn’t bear to see it anymore. The sun had no other solution but to let go of the girl completely, nevermind how much the idea was hurting.

   Months passed, and Jurina never heard the sun’s voice again. Jurina’s pain gave way to melancholia, soon realizing it was impossible for her to fully forget about Rena. Yes, she spent more time with her friends again, but she never managed to fill the void Rena had left in her heart. She still passed by the river bank on a few occasions and each time, she couldn’t help but look up to the sky, remembering the times she would speak freely with her beloved sun.

At first, Jurina would pass by the river bank on purpose, just in case the sun would finally decide to answer back. However, when she realized it was only wishful thinking on her behalf and the sky remained completely silent, she realized her wish would never come true. Her chest constricted in pain at the terrible thought. Was that what they called a heartbreak? If yes, then she never wished to go through that experience again.

   The next Summer arrived faster than she would have predicted. Jurina knew she needed to move on if she wished to get over her heartbreak, and she put all her energy in her studies. Her hard work paid off: she ended at the top of her class, and graduated from high school with a high score by the end of the year. Without surprise, she passed the entrance examination of one of the best universities in Tokyo with great success.

It was the first Saturday of August 2017, and Jurina had decided for the holidays to go back to her hometown. After spending some time with her family, she was reunited with her childhood friends as she went to enjoy the Osu festival. Jurina followed them happily, admitting it was nice to finally spend some time with her friends, and enjoy the short respite the holidays procured.

After watching the Osu festival they all went by the river bank, her friends immediately starting to play with handheld sparklers. Jurina accompanied them, admitting the lights looked beautiful in the now pitch-dark sky.

Jurina was having fun and enjoying herself but for an unknown reason, her thoughts suddenly went to the sun, and she gazed sadly at the starry sky over her head. The sky was beautiful, Jurina admitted, but it was nothing compared with the beauty of her sun. Her impossible wish, buried deep inside her all this time, resurfaced. She missed the sun so badly.

Jurina got extracted from her thoughts when she heard her friends laughing, and she gazed at them pensively. Her mind was filled with thoughts of Rena, and she wasn’t having fun anymore despite the good company. That’s why she decided to take a walk by the river bank, in the hope it would clear her head. She didn’t wish to go too far so she took a seat on the grass, close enough to her friends in case they asked for her.  

She contemplated the starry sky for a little while, until hearing soft footsteps approaching. At first, Jurina believed it was one of her friends coming to see her and she quickly tried to think of a good excuse to justify her wish to isolate herself. However, the face that soon came into view was completely unfamiliar to her.

“Are you alright?” The girl, who seemed in her twenties, asked in concern.

Jurina gazed at her in awe, taking in her yellow yukata and her black hair tied into a neat bun. Jurina couldn’t help thinking it was the most beautiful girl she had ever seen on earth. Realizing the girl was still expecting a reply Jurina nodded quickly, a warm smile plastering progressively the stranger’s porcelain face.

The girl didn’t seem willing to leave quite yet but Jurina surely didn’t mind, taking advantage of the moment to observe her more carefully. She was positively sure she had never seen that girl before – she would definitely have remembered otherwise - which was very strange considering her voice sounded oddly familiar.

“Please take care of yourself,” the girl continued. “The night is going to get chilly.”

Jurina nodded a second time, wondering why she couldn’t find her voice in the presence of this girl. The stranger gazed at her at length before turning slowly on her heels, but Jurina couldn’t detach her eyes from her as she drew away. Despite knowing she had never seen this girl before, she couldn’t shake the feeling she had heard her voice somewhere. She searched her memory again and again.

She had never met that person before – Jurina had no doubt about it – but she recognized this voice. In fact, the more she thought about it, the more it looked similar to…

No, it was impossible! Jurina stood up at once, staring at the yellow yukata that was drawing away. Was her desperate wish to be reunited with the sun again making her go all crazy? This woman couldn’t be…

Jurina realized how strange she would look like if it ended up being a stupid mistake. All of a sudden, she heard one of her friends calling her, and asking her to join them. But Jurina didn’t pay attention to it, her eyes glued on the girl who had addressed her a few minutes ago, and would soon be out of reach. Realizing it would soon be too late, she shouted the name she had assigned to her beloved sun more than a year ago. “Rena-chan!”

The girl she had just shouted at didn’t stop as she predicted, and Jurina was now truly starting to believe she had gone crazy. “Of course it was not her,” Jurina muttered, a bit angry at herself for getting her hopes up so foolishly. Her sun was supposed to stay in the sky forever, and couldn’t possibly be walking on earth amongst mere mortals.

Tears welled up in her eyes, and Jurina wondered if she would ever be able to forget about the sun that won her heart so effortlessly more than a year ago. The fact that she had just mistaken that stranger for her beloved sun was a clear indication that she still had a long way to go.

Jurina felt the tears rolling down her cheeks silently, and she buried her face in her hands. From afar, she heard one of her friends calling her name again, but it was unconceivable to show herself in such a state in front of her friends. Jurina tried to compose herself, much in vain as tears kept streaming down her face as she cried.

Jurina froze when she felt a pair of arms enveloping her gently, and heard a trembling voice murmuring in her ear. “Forgive me, Jurina... Please don’t cry.”

Jurina let the words sink in, warmth spreading through her chest when she heard again the voice she had missed so much. She took a step back and lowered her hands to stare at the girl clad in a yellow yukata standing in front of her. Jurina opened her mouth to speak, but no words managed to come out. It was really her. It was her sun!

“Can you… forgive me?” The sun asked tentatively, brushing away her tears tenderly.

Rena’s fingers were so warm, that Jurina couldn’t help fluttering her eyes close at the pleasant sensation, and leaning into her touch. “I will forgive you on only one condition,” she managed to finally utter, looking straight into Rena’s eyes. “Don’t ever leave me again.”

The sun found itself a bit taken aback by Jurina’s serious tone. However, it knew there was only reply it could give the younger girl. “I’ll keep you warm as long as you want me.”

Jurina read the sincerity in Rena’s eyes, and tears slid down her cheeks in a mix of relief and joy. Jurina had no idea how this miracle was possible; even less what the future had in store for both of them. However, she was very decided not to let go of her sun now that she managed to find her again.

Jurina embraced the other girl tightly, relishing the warmth the body against her emitted as she felt two arms wrapping around her waist in reaction. It was a dream come true, Jurina couldn’t help thinking as she was finally able to hold in her arms her dear sun. She had waited for so long to be able to touch her, that she needed to keep repeating to herself again and again that this was really happening and not a figment of her imagination.

Jurina pulled away from the embrace slightly, just enough to be able to gaze back at the other girl. She was as beautiful as in her dreams, she thought as she caressed her cheek softly. She fitted so well the description she had once given the sun. And, as she closed her eyes and placed her lips against Rena’s, realized they were also as soft as she imagined.

Jurina simply knew she would never let go of Rena after that day.

“Um.. hello! Rose, right? Um, I’m Amethyst from next door. I’m the oldest son and, um, my Mom asked me to bring these for you..” I stuttered while trying to hand her the plastic bag with the foods container inside.

There was some awkward pause. She didn’t react directly after I finished talking. I started to want to curse myself for this awkwardness but that was when she broke the ice. I could feel her hand touching the plastic bag and taking it away from me. And the next thing was definitely one of the thing I wouldn’t ever forget for the rest of my life.

“Thank you.”

She talked.

She talked to me.

For the first time, Rose really talked to me. That’s new. I am so gonna brag about this to my little brother later--even though obviously he had talked to Rose first, faster than me.

Then I tried my best to answer “No problem,” without stuttering. I was just so nervous in front of her, even when I cannot see. I wonder what would happen if I could see. Would I be struck with her beauty—would I even dare to come into the front of her house at all.

Wait, beauty? Did I just picture her as beautiful?

I wanted to give a slap to my own face. Why did I even wonder about that?

“Sorry to trouble you. Would you like to have some drink?” Rose asked, almost out of the blue.

That was the second line I heard directly from her. I thought that I really needed to get accostumed to this fast or.. Wait. Did she ask because I had not gone from her house yet, even though my business was over? Oh Lord, maybe she was trying to be polite.

“Ah no, no. That’s okay. I’ll be taking my leave now..”

I was just about to turn around when I felt that something was touching me. Someone’s hand touched my shoulder. To be more precise, it was a girl’s hand—back of hand. Rose?

That was the gesture to tell someone blind that she didn’t mean any harm. How did she know?

“Milk,” Rose paused then continued,“Or tea?”

Now, now. She really did ask—or force me to have a drink. Milk or tea. Why milk or tea? As I was too confused, it seemed that only irrelevant things appeared on my mind. Next, my mouth answered faster than my brain. Seemed like it was smarter. It said, “Anything is fine, thank you.”

And I could feel Rose taking few steps back, entering her house. And there I was, still standing blankly, unmoving. What should I do? Was the decision to agree right?

“Please come in, don’t just stand there.”

Rose’s voice startled me. To be more precise, the invitation startled me. Me? Entering a girl—or maybe a woman’s house alone, in this afternoon? She lives alone, doesn’t she?

“Ah no, I’ll just stay here,” I refused.

“No, please come in, it’s hot out there. And the porch is dirty.”

I was about to refuse once more when I could hear Rose walking towards me. In a blink, she yanked my wrist, pulling me and saying, “Please just do come in. It’s alright.”

============

“Please wait here,” Rose said.

I sat on a sofa. Before she left me for the kitchen, Rose told me that this was the living room and that I should just relax. While she’s gone, I tried to recall what the house was like. From the feel of it, the house was quite spacious. Right now I could hear Rose making a drink, but she didn’t really sound close to me. I could tell it by the sound of water. Other than that, I didn’t really hear anything else, not the sound of the street, not even a faint buzz of the turned on lamps. I guessed that in this very place, the lamps were not turned on. There was no sound and no feel of air conditioner either. Yet the house didn’t feel hot at all. It was not hot, it was not warm either. The wooden floor even felt quite cold. And from somewhere, I could smell a faint scent of laundry soap. Perhaps Rose just hung the laundries out.

I remembered that there were not many partitions in the house. It was relatively easy to move around in here, if not for the furnitures I was not familiar with. In short, this place was spacious and filled well with furnitures. In this spacious place, I wonder where did she usually sing?

Speaking of which, waiting here and thinking about the house gave me quite a weird feeling. I couldn’t help but to compare my house to hers. My family is consisted of six people and I think we have a regular-sized house, as it felt that it is quite packed. While Rose, she’s living alone in thisrelatively huge house.

I wondered if she didn’t feel lonely?

“Sorry to keep you waiting,” Rose said, dispersing me from my day dream.

I could hear she put a glass onto the desk next to me. Perhaps a cup. I couldn’t tell what was the material, but it sounded solid. “Thanks..” I muttered. I was about to move my hand to search for the glass she put, when once again Rose surprised me.

“The glass is on your right, 2 o’clock direction. It shouldn’t be that hot anymore but please be careful.”

That surprised me. I was right.

She knew how to deal with blind people.

“Thank you.”I said softly.

She didn’t reply. But I assumed she was listening.

“You are experienced in dealing with blind person, huh?” I emphasized.

“Not really.”

"Where did you learn it from?"

"Someone with visual impairments."

“Oh, I see.” I nodded.

I sipped my drink. Rose made me a glass of milk tea. I wanted to laugh because I didn’t expect her to mix both drinks just because I said that anything will do earlier. But I held it in and drank silently. The milk tea was warm and sweet. I asked a question.“Do you like milk tea?”

“Not really.”

“Really? This is delicious, I thought you always made it for yourself.. ”I chuckled.

Rose didn’t respond, I kind of expected that. Yet honestly the situation felt a bit weird. Rose was very silent for a person who invited me to her house, as she didn’t say anything even as a while had passed. Didn’t she want to say something to me? Anyway, I was really curious of her.

What was she thinking of that time and what kind of expression did she make?

Out of the blue, Rose asked. “How old are you?”

“I’m twenty this year. Why?”

“Nothing.”

“How old are you?”

“Older.”

“I’m sorry?”

“Older than you.”

I wanted to ask “how old is older than me”, but it seemed like it was not appropriate. Then there was the silence again. She’s not the talkative type huh? Something inside of me told me to try and find a topic, whatever it was. I mean, haven’t I always wanted to speak to her and know more about her? I was still thinking when Rose asked another question.

“Your eyes.. since when?”

“Excuse me?”

“Since when does your eyes..”

“Oh, it’s since I was born.”

Rose fell silent again. I continued lightly, “It’s a disease. But I can still see a litte, you know.”

“Can you see me?” Rose asked, somehow she sounded very careful.

“Uh, too bad, no. My vision is very, very limited. And it’s hard to see someone’s face.”

“I see..”

Somehow, I felt that Rose was a little bit relieved.

Now, it was my turn to ask questions.

“Have you always lived alone?”

Another silence.

“Err.. I’m sorry.” I said awkwardly. Did I ask something I shouldn’t have asked?

 But to my surprise, she answered softly, “No.”

“Oh,” I paused, “With whom did you live with?”

“My family.”

“Oh? With your parents? Where are they now?” I asked, hoping that she would continue.

Yet, this time she stayed silent. I thought that perhaps she disliked to be asked about her family, so after a short pause I tried to ask another question. “Where did you live before, Rose?”

Wait, isn’t this question wrong as well?

I felt that I really was probing too much into her personal life. I felt like blaming myself for doing so. But I kept on wondering too. What did you ask strangers if not the basic things? Aren’t these questions normal to be asked to strangers? Are these not normal?

And more importantly, she might be thinking what I was thinking now. Why do I want to know so much?

I began to worry, I began to feel what stupid questions that I just asked. Feeling bad for myself, I had the urge to gulp the last drop of my milk tea and thanking her and telling her that I should be going home now. But, once again, Rose answered the moment I thought she would not. Just as I touched the glass, she spoke.

“I used to live far away from here. But I used to live here too.”

“Pardon me?” I was confused.

“I used to live here too,” she repeated herself.

That surprised me. That was something that I didn’t know about. When was that? Was that the reason why my Mom seemed to know everything about her?

“When was that?”

“Your mother knows more.”

And with that, Rose shut her mouth tight. I just knew it from her tone that she wouldn’t say anything more, that it was a form of rejection to say anymore. It would be useless to ask more. So I drank my milk tea until it’s dry. Putting the glass back onto the desk in front of me, I said,

“I guess I’ll ask her, then.”

Rose didn’t reply. I was getting to get used to her silence. Another  silence passed, quite the long one. Basically, as almost nothing made sound in this room, it felt longer. I decided that I needed to stop this, she didn’t want to talk.

“Then thank you for your hospitality, Rose. I think I better get going now.”

“Thank you for the foods too,” she replied short.

I stood up, Rose too. She reached out to my hand again, holding my wrist while guiding me outside. We were both silent all the time. I wondered what was the point of this all? Did she try to be polite?

After we got outside, before I started to walk into the direction of my house, while setting up my crane I spoke.

“Anyway, Rose, Mom told me to tell you that if you want to, you are always welcome at our house. She also invited you to have lunch, dinner, or whenever you feel like eating.”

“Please tell her thank you.”

“You’re welcome and she said you should definitely not refuse,” I chuckled while remembering my Mom’s stern face when she said that. Rose softly replied “Thank you,” once again, but then she didn’t say anything else.

I guess that’s what people said to you when they politely refuse. Oh, well.

“Well, good afternoon.”

“Good afternoon.”

I turned my back. Taking few steps, I could hear the sound of door closing behind me. Rose lightly closed it then she went back into her sanctuary.

The lonely and quiet one.

============

That night, I wondered

About what happened in the afternoon,

About why Rose behaved that way

About the things she said,