Feb 7, 2023
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[ STRADDLE ] (hatchetmen) ((Fawn and Max? Idk thinking about the them))
[ STRADDLE ] : sender straddles receiver @hatchetmen
Max had grown to enjoy his "enrichment" time out of his seemingly perpetual torment in the black and white, yeah it sucked that nobody seemed to miss him at all, not even the people he had considered his friends in his life, but at least he got to hang out with Fawn and their siblings and they didn't seem to like totally hate him. He thought despite being her father and uncle's plaything that she actually was fond of him, something that he got proof of on this day out. He and Fawn had just been hanging out in her room, sitting on the bed chatting for a bit, but surprisingly he soon found Fawn straddling his lap. He hadn't had this kind of physical contact for months and already he could feel himself getting excited. Another sort of forbidden fruit moment for him, the daughter of one of his tormentors who probably wouldn't give a shit if they fucked but it still felt like it was something kinda taboo. "Oh shit, really," he asked, his hands almost instantly going to her waist as if it was second nature to him. He hadn't been secretive about the fact he found Fawn attractive, but he didn't really think anything would happen between the two of them.
so the way i'm understanding the season 2 lore is that the witchwood forest is magic because of the lords in black. the land was "paid for in blood" so the land itself is what holds the magic. things grow big, and different in the witchwood; both plants and people. the tree people are people with the gift who were buried in the ground by the hatchetmen, a group of men whose goal is seemingly to get rid of the gift and to keep the lords in black's magic contained in the witchwood forest. the trees are a sort of vessel for the gift, and when they are chopped down, the gift is released and can attach itself to any child in hatchetfield. webby seeks out these children and keeps them company, tries to keep them safe from her brothers. the gift peaks at 15 and most people grow out of it
i'm still not totally clear about the church of the starry children, but they worship the lords in black and sacrifice the honey queen each year, a ritual started in 1945 to allow nibby to walk the earth for one night on the eve of the honey festival. the original members of the church, one of which was sherman young's biological father, were murdered by the hatchetmen. they mightve written the black book; they definitely used it
Alright so here are the hatchetmen/daddy notes, I'll go into more detail in the synopsis, but I wanna get this out for the people who need it-
They're a bunch of sleezy men, played by james, jon, and nick.
I think they're all brothers, at least they're referred to that way. Not sure if its by blood or like a brotherhood kind of way.
They keep calling the leader of this patriarchy, bob Metsker(played by Dylan Saunders) Daddy. Clearly leading up to the episode of the same name
Bob says he paid for his land with blood 👀👀
"Don't you think its time the kids move out, maybe to Clivesdale?" -Emma
"My kin, stays with their DAAADDDYYY" -Bob
Emma's mad at him, saying there's not a problems since she's not going on his property, and she's mad that they're harassing ziggs, saying what she does on her property is her business.
"What you've done with this land is an abomination!" -bob
he doesnt care about the weed being grown, he cares about the trees she chopped to make way for the weed fields
ziggs is kinda into it at first, "mad respect, save the trees!"
emmas great grand dad bought this land
bob gives one final warning to leave, but emma simply says that shes now gotta build a fence
as she walks off, bob directly quotes the judge who ordered the execution of willabella muckwab in witch in the web
"the innocent must suffer, the guilty must be punished, you must taste blood to be a man!"
starting to wonder if this is like a hatchetmen mantra or something
a few hours later, emma confesses why her weed is so good
she's a horrible farmer, in fact, her weed in high school was grown in her closet, she didn't even know to give it sunlight, she forgot to water it, the dog peed in it, but people loved it
she says the secret is she uses soil from the witchwood, that's why her weed is so good, she's convinced the soil is magic (well you're not far off there emma 👀👀)
ziggs notes that if the soils magic, the trees are probably magic, and wonders if thats why those guys were so mad they cut the trees down
Just then, they're farmhouse is broken in by the matsker clan with torches and axes
They then burry emma and ziggs with only their heads above the dirt
emma tries to plead with bob, promising 20% of their annual profit
Bob starts exposition dumping and here's the juicy good stuff.
he explains to emma that some born in this town are different.
they called it having a touch of the Gift
He clearly hates these people, calling it vile sorcery
"it is the sword duty of the hatchetmen to collect these freaks and bring them here. To be planted."
he then says something i cant quite make out "the ritual cleanses them of their dangerous flesh" i think? "and gives them a new body, of bark, and leaves! Their roots and canopies make a net to catch all that bad magic, so that it may not seep into the precious skin of anymore beautiful babies!"
"When you cut down those trees you opened the floodgates! Now every teenybopper in town is susceptible to this malady!"
(dude all im hearing is more hatchetfield witches uh yes please!)
"you took all the power built up in that soil and you smoked it!!"
anyways side note emma mentions how the magic makes everything grow bigger, faster, stronger, so that's why baby jerry grew so quickly and got so demented.
bob wants them to atone and be apart of a new crop
so i guess he wants emma and ziggs to be tree people, which is a lil weird considering, despite what I picked up from my first watch, neither of them have the gift
however if anyone were to make witch emma or ziggs content pls tag me id love that so so much 👀👀
bob then goes to destroy the weed and bury emma and ziggs but are then killed by the nighthawks
anyways that was whirlwind of an exposition/lore dump
tagging: @shhimavoidingsleep @hatchetfieldtheories @gotta-get-back-to-hatchetfield i know they're gonna wanna see this.
any other questions about this shoot me an ask. I'll try and get on those synopsis's as quick as possible and send them to those that requested it. I'll be sending in one link to perky's buds, and the other for abstinence camp, I'm separating it by story
hey xenogender / neurodivergent community!! i made a xenogender for people who have a strong connection towards insane clown posse/being apart of their juggalo community :)) you can use any pronouns for this gender however clown/clownselves works the best for this, feel free to comment any pronoun ideas for people who may want to use this gender :)) i hope you like the flag variants i’ve done!! <3
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Hatchetmen | Black Smoke | 1996
Random rap by NYC trio Hatchetmen, composed of K.O.S. The Predator, Mr. Wonderful, and Nab Vader. This was their only release, on Playa Records.
Closed w/ @hatchetmen
Trading in one small, kinda fucked up town in the desert for one in the Midwest wasn’t something Jamie thought would be in their life but the universe was strange. They felt a sort of calling to Hatchetfield. Perhaps it was reading too many cold cases that featured a number of missing persons from the town that drew him there, but all the same, he couldn’t shake the feeling that they were needed there. Once they had all their boxes loaded into their new apartment, they found themself drawn to the local bookstore. When there, they found their way to the person stocking shelves. “Hi, excuse me, do you have any books on an underground religion called The Church of the Starry Children,” they asked, frankly finding her and the person behind the counter to be far cooler than they were expecting to find in this town. Who were they to question the fate the universe was pushing upon them, but they did feel drawn to the employee in some way. They didn’t know where the name the church of starry children came from, they’d just come in to scope things out, and in their research of the town, that was not something they’d seen, as if the name put itself into their mind the second they stepped foot on the island.
Debating whether or not the hatchetmen should be relevant in the au…
