#harrystylesxplussizedoc

First went the lipstick.

This was so fucking stupid. Why the fuck did I do this?

Then the foundation.

I could've been asleep this entire time! 

Then the eyebrows followed by the mascara.

He's not even going to fucking care, nor notice! I not only wasted makeup, but my time and effort! All of this shit could've gone towards a job interview! A family reunion! A date for god sake! 

I stared at my bright red, assaulted, skin; dark mascara still under my eye, smears of lipstick left behind, telling me I needed another makeup wipe.

My eyes burned as the tears settled in my waterline.

I looked date ready, and maybe that's what hurt? Knowing I looked date ready for a man who would never want to date me.

I washed my face with water and a cleanser before grabbing a hair tie and throwing my hair up into a now high, loosely curled ponytail.

I leaned back against the wall, my dark circles from lack of sleep, and the mascara residue staring me in the face.

Pulling off my expensive plain white shirt that had pretty lace detailing on the cuffs of my sleeves left me in a white, lacey bra; I groaned.

This was so fucking stupid.

Unclipping the fancy bra, I tossed it to the ground, ignoring the way my boobs fell and weighed down my chest as I entered my bedroom, grabbing a simple nude, plain bra and a loose t-shirt.

Stupid stupid stupid Delaney! 

I wiggled out of my stupid skin tight shorts, grabbing some loose, easy to move in jeans that had wide, baggy hole's in the knees.

The sun was starting to rise, and I knew Harry would already be out this morning taking care of the animals and I felt like I was going to be sick.

I just wasted two hours on a man just to wipe it all off because of my stupid impulsive decisions! I could've just left it all on, said fuck him, and felt good about myself all day, but nooooo, I got insecure and wiped it all off and wasted it! I didn't even take a fucking picture!

Stupid stupid Delaney! 

I ran my hands over my face, a strangled noise coming from my throat before I took a deep breath, grabbing my phone ready to hopefully get through today.

All day I avoided Harry the best I could. 

I couldn't face the fact of what I had done this morning, knowing damn well this man didn't want me. Along with the fact that he could have an entirely different family and I refuse to be a homewrecker! Or.. or.. or.. I don't know! Anything that will paint me in a bad light! I didn't need the drama. 

I got home from the market, my dad having called me asking me for help in the barn.

Walking in, Sassy trailing behind me like she owned the damn place, loudly meowing for attention; my father happily scooping her up and saying hello.

Spoiled brat.

My dad informed me that the horses needed their trail ride today before leaving Harry and I alone in the barn.

I stared at Harry's back, knowing I had to ask him for help, but deeply regretting ever needing him to begin with.

At least I wasn't wearing a lacy shirt, red lipstick and a probably crooked liner.

"Uh, hey.. how's it going?" I asked him, Harry bent over pulling bags of horse grain from a crate, placing it on the floor.

"Fine" he gruffly replied,  pulling another large bag of grain out of the crate, tossing it next to the other two.

I nodded — even though he couldn't see me, trying to think quick on my feet to not let what now felt like awkward silence, at least to me, linger longer than necessary.

"Are you busy?" I stupidly asked, regretting it immediately.

"Yes" he replied instantly, my head falling back on my shoulders as my eyes closed.

Of course he's fucking busy Delaney! He's literally doing a task right now!

"I uh.. are you able to help me with the horses?" I quickly spit out, "My dad has to go back to the Rickman's" Harry froze, his muscles visibly tensing, "And the horses need to go on their trail ride, I just.. normally Morgan, or Wrenlynn help me, but uh.. well" I stumbled, my anxious racing thoughts no long becoming coherent in my brain.

"I don't ride horses" He firmly replied, grunting as he picked up one of the horse feed bags, his boots thudding against the concrete as he walked over to the ladder, impressively, yet scaring the shit out of me, climbing it with one hand as the other held the feed.

I watched intently, afraid of him acting all macho and then falling off and busting his skull open.

I couldn't help myself but call out, "But you're a rancher?" knowing damn well I should've left it alone, but I was confused by how someone who works on a farm doesn't ride horses?

Harry didn't reply, in fact, it seemed as if he was ignoring my entire existence, shuffling around stuff on the loft, "Harry?" I called out again, standing far enough away that I could watch him moving the bags of grain around, acting like it was as easy as tossing a throw blanket into a ball on the floor. I sighed, "Harry, how can you not ride horses? You're a rancher" I stated the obvious again, wishing this man would open up more so I could simply understand his stiff and stern reactions. "Look, I wouldn't have asked if I knew it was a firm no; it's just we need to do it, and everyone else is busy, and it's a lot to do by myself. I was just asking for help is all, but if you can't, or don't want to, fine" I turned on my heel, walking towards Baylor, my all black Shire horse, grabbing my brush to clean his coat before braiding his mane, wanting to prevent tangles and matting whilst we worked when I heard Harry say directly behind me, "Can't you wait for your father to be back?" making me jump due to the close proximity.

"He's booked solid helping the town, Harry. It's fine, it'll just take me longer" I replied, running my hand down Baylor's side.

I grabbed my step stool, taking the two steps up before draping a blanket over his back, fitting the saddle over the blanket. I made sure nothing was too tight or too lose, and that the blanket was lose yet snug in all the right areas. Grabbing my lead, I begun to lead Baylor out of the stables, hoisting myself up and over when Harry asked, "This is your horse?"

"This is my baby—" 

"Baby nothing. That horse is bigger than you are!" He declared, my brow furrowing. 

"That's the point" 

"What?" 

"That's the point. A big girl needs a big horse. I like that he's big. I like that I feel safe and secure on him, even at my height and weight. He's a gentle giant" 

Harry appeared perplexed before shaking his head followed by saying, "My job is to help you, but I don't ride horses"

"May I ask why?"

"No" he replied instantly, my body stilling like someone had dumped cold water over my head.

 Oh.

Why?

"Alright well, I need to get started. If you need anything.... I'm sure you can find someone" I unintentionally huffed, giving Baylor his command to start walking down the driveway.

I got halfway down the road when a loud, "FINE! I'LL HELP!" made my head turn over my shoulder, Harry standing a good fifty, sixty feet from me with his arms crossed over his chest just staring at my horse's butt.

I stopped Baylor, getting us to turn around and face Harry, calling back, "NO ONE IS FORCING YOU!" my hand running down Baylor's neck.

"DO YOU WANT MY HELP OR NOT?!"

Baylor and I got back to barn after Harry just stared at us; Harry watching me slide down my horse, tying him to the barn post so I could grab the horse Harry would use, "So what changed your mind?" I asked, clearly having a death wish, silently praying he didn't decide then and there to leave me yet again in the dust.

"It's my job to help you" 

Ah. Yes. He's here because he has to be.

"Alright well, this is Tina" I showed Harry our Morgan horse, Harry scowling.

"I'm aware of your horses, Delaney"

"I know. This is your horse today. You said you don't ride horses, and she's really good for beginners" I ran my hand down her neck before starting to saddle her.

"Who names their horse Tina?"

"Don't disrespect Tina" I warned, "And Wren did"

"Of course she did" he scoffed, arms laid over one another across his chest.

I moved my mouth closer to Tina's ear, whispering, "Don't listen to him" 

I could practically feel Harry's nerves seeping out of him as I grabbed his protective gear.

I held out a helmet for him, Harry just starting at it before slowly taking it and placing it on his head. He clipped the buckle under his chin and I grinned.

"I look stupid, don't I" he stated, rather than asked, huffing slightly as my grin widened.

"You look great" I laughed, his eyes rolling. "Have you ever ridden a horse?" I asked, Harry nodding, staring at Tina like she was some alien. "When's the last time you rode a horse?" my curiosity piqued, the senseful part of my brain ignoring the blaring alarms telling me to shut up and leave him alone and just be thankful he is actually helping me.

Instead of replying, he asked, "Won't I break her?" making me snicker, shaking my head.

"Nope"

"But your horse is ginormous?" He frowned, tugging at my heartstrings as he appeared like a little boy afraid to learn to ride a bike.

"Shouldn't that make you more afraid?" I asked, Harry's head snapping over to look at me.

"I'm not afraid" he stated, sounding offended that I would even utter such thing.

Yeah, okay.

Tina was saddled up, and I led her out of the barn, handing her off to Harry before hopping up onto Baylor, waiting for Harry to do the same.

I watched Harry stand still, staring at Tina, his eyes closing for a moment before watching him take a deep breath.

Oh. This is more serious than I thought.

I watched as he hoisted himself up onto the horse; I could practically see him shaking in his boots from here.

I started to lead Baylor back down the driveway, assuming that once we got going Harry would be fine. I poked my head back around my shoulder, Harry still just sat on Tina by the barn.

"Come on slowpoke!" I called out, teasing.

I continued down the driveway, stopping to wait for Harry, only to see he was still by the barn.

I went back to the barn, hoping off Baylor and tying him to the barn again then walking over to Harry, smiling. 

"Hi" I grinned, Harry's eyes narrowed at me, "Need help?" I asked, not able to wipe the smug smile off my face. "Haven't ridden a horse before?" I asked, my tone slightly teasing, "Hm, figured you would've since you're a rancher and all" I giggled, rubbing my hand down the top of Tina's nose.

Harry's nostrils flare as he goes to get off, confusing Delaney

"Where are you going?" I asked, frowning.

"I'm not going"

"Why?"

"You're making fun of me. I have better shit to do anyway" He huffed, getting off the horse, beginning to walk away.

 I knew I was teasing him, but it was all in good fun! I didn't think he'd actually get upset! 

"I'm only making fun of you a little!" I call after him, snickering as my fingers pinched together, referencing my words. "I'll help you! Come back, please! I really need to get the horses out" I begged, guilt consuming me at the idea of having upset him. "Harry! I'm sorry!" I called after him, quickly jogging to him, my hand reaching out for his arm.

My fingers grasped his bicep, surprised by how warm his skin was, Harry still walking, ignoring my attempts at stopping his strides.

"Harry! Please!" 

"I offered to help you, and you made fun of me"

"I know, I'm sorry! I didn't think you'd actually get upset!" 

He turned quickly on his heel, facing me as I halted to a spot, "Why wouldn't I? I don't ride horses for a good reason and you made fun of me! Do you know how sick and twisted that is, Delaney?"

"But.. but I didn't mean to hurt you! I just.. you're a rancher Harry and you don't ride horses! It's a little comical. I'm sorry, please" I begged, "If I knew how serious it was, I wouldn't have done that, I promise!" I could feel my heartbeat in my ears as desperation crawled out of me, wishing I could take back everything.

"I don't appreciate being made fun of" He said, turning around, back enroute to his house.

"I'm sorry! Harry, please, stop!" I cried out, tired of chasing this man all over the ranch. "You know what? Fine! Pout! I didn't know it was this serious!" I yelled, my frustration staring to bubble over, "You know, maybe I wouldn't have made fun of you if you would've just been honest with me in the first place instead of keeping everything locked away! God, I try and I try and you just.. you just.. you ignore me! And you know what? Maybe that's my fucking fault for caring and shit, but YOU'RE A GROWN ASS MAN! Act like it!" I yelled, feeling eyes surround me.

My chest was moving rapidly and I quickly moved my head to see that all the animals were looking at me.

Great.

I ran back to Baylor and Tina, grabbing Tina and leading her back into the barn to take all her stuff off until I was ready for her again, tears flowing freely down my cheeks as I choked on a sob or two.

This day has been a disaster from start to finish, and I was sick and tired of it.

I was tired of constantly walking on eggshells, feeling like I can't freely express myself down to just making a joke. If he would've told me how serious it was, I would've taken him more seriously! Just telling someone "I don't ride horses" when you're a rancher sounds stupid! Why wouldn't I have thought he was just being an asshole to be an asshole? Somehow me reading him wrong has me crying yet again like it's my fault! If he would've just been honest I would've helped him.

I wiped at my face, pulling myself together before getting back on Baylor, very much so needing this trail ride for my own mental health rather than just exercising the horse.

"Delaney" Harry's rough, flat voice said, my head dropping low.

"What, Harry?"

"I apologize for not being honest with you." He said, getting my head to lift, turning to face him. "I don't ride horses anymore" He emphasized.

"Let me guess, I can't ask why" I huffed, tired of the back and forth.

His head shook, "I'd rather not talk about it, no" 

"Okay, well. Thanks for apologizing, I guess"

I commanded Baylor to start walking when Harry stopped me again.

I groaned, stopping Baylor.

"You know Harry, I could've been done already. If you don't want to help, you could've just told me. I need to get this done. I have a lot of stuff to do today. I asked for your help because I figured you'd actually be helpful" I huffed.

I swear he flinched, his jaw clenching as he nodded.

"Sorry for disappointing you then" His voice was monotonous with a hint of sarcasm and... disappointment? 

Shit.

"That's not what I meant" I groaned, my entire body wanting to just crumple into a ball on the floor.

"No, Delaney. It's exactly what you meant" He glared.

"No it's not—" I quickly defended, wishing I could just shut up and let him be mad at me; it would be a hell of a lot easier than bickering with him.

"Sounded pretty fucking crystal clear to me" He interrupted, frustrating me further.

"Goddammit Harry, will you just shut up for two seconds! That's not what I meant! I'm tired, I'm frustrated, and I have a lot to do! I swear I can't say anything without you getting mad at me and it's tiring!"

"You asked me for help!" His voice raised, nostrils flaring slightly before he took a deep breath, rolling back his shoulders, his Adam's apple visibly bouncing as he swallowed.

"I thought you'd be helpful!"

"I'm trying!"

"How?! You stop me every time I try to make progress!"

"I haven't ridden a horse in almost two decades, Delaney! I want to help you, I just don't remember how exactly" He grumbled, his hand moving up to brush against the tip of his nose before falling to his side and pulling at the end of shirt, attempting to straighten it out more, followed by running his hands through his hair, a few pieces falling down against his forehead.

"You could've just said that, you know. I would've helped and we could've avoided this entire song and dance you like to put us through" I huffed yet again, wishing I could strangle and kiss him all at the same time.

"My job is to help you. My job is to do what I'm asked. I.." he paused, chewing on his lip for a second, his eyes narrowing, "I can't do my job, when I don't know the task"

My head tilted, "Why do you view everything as a task?" I asked, brow furrowing as I licked my lips, rolling them.

"You assigned me the task"

"No," My head shook, "I asked for help" 

"Same thing"

"No Harry, it isn't. We're doing the task together. I just.. I don't understand why everything feels like a game to you? How many times do I have to tell you that this ranch is a team effort? I don't expect you to know everything! Or to get everything done in one day! If you're afraid of horses, or don't know how to ride a horse, you could've just said that. I wouldn't have pushed you any further, or made fun of you; I could've helped you if you had told me. Can you please, please, stop viewing me as the enemy? I'm trying here, Harry and you just keep shoving me away! It's frustrating, and tiring, and honestly? I'm getting sick of it"

"I haven't ridden a horse since I was ten" he said abruptly, shutting me up.

"What?"

"I haven't ridden a horse since I was ten" he repeated.

"Yeah, no, I heard you the first time. Explain further please?"

"No"

"No? Harry—"

"Stop! Stop pushing all the goddamn time! You want to talk frustrating?! That's frustrating! You act entitled, like you deserve to know everything! I'm starting to miss when you were quiet, overthinking to yourself. You don't need to know everything, Delaney. You say I keep playing games with you, then what is this? I tell you something and you just can't leave it alone!"

"I'm just trying to understand you better" My voice cracked, my chest feeling heavy as I watched him glare at me.

"Well don't. Just teach me how to ride this damn horse so I can get this over with" he roughly replied, walking towards the barn, his back to me once again.

I took a deep breath, attempting to collect my spiraling emotions.

 I'm starting to miss when you were quiet, overthinking to yourself.

Trust me, I hear you loud and clear this time. 

"Come on slowpoke!" Harry called out, my eyes widening slightly as the burn intensified.

Did he just...?

* * * * 

Harry shaved his head. This was not on my 2023 bingo card.

I would've had this out sooner, but I redid the entire chapter twice..

Written on: November 3rd, 7th, 10th 2023

Published on: November 10th 2023

Word Count: 3729

I could feel myself start to get agitated as I tried to figure out the motive for her arrival tonight. The silence on her end only made my spiraling thoughts worsen.

I knew I frustrated her. I could see it in her eyes anytime I spoke. She looked fed up with me. Like she'd rather be anywhere else than around me, but then I could feel her eyes linger on me. A feeling I knew all too well that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand tall as I kept walking, hoping they kept their promise that this place was nothing like the Rickman's. So far, that was true.

I wasn't overworked. If anything, I made myself work ten times harder than they had asked. After all, I was used to working on a much larger ranch. When I finished my chores for the day I started fixing little things here and there; keeping myself busy so they didn't have a chance to yell at me for twiddling my thumbs, even though it was never asked of me.

I knew Mr. Fallen didn't expect me to play handyman, but fixing gate latches and a leaky pipe here and there on the hoses made my job easier. I just hoped that they'd be more grateful than annoyed that I had gone and taken it upon myself to alter something they hadn't asked of me to do.

With the Rickman's it was always a toss up. Either you did something they didn't ask you of, and it was never mentioned, — they wouldn't be caught dead praising you for doing something of their benefit, even though you knew they had noticed; or you got yelled at for stepping out of place. Blamed for taking a job from someone else; that person then getting punished for letting their job be stolen.

If you weren't working twice as hard, you weren't working well enough, and if you stepped on someone else's toes by taking their work from them, you were considered greedy and inconsiderate. Yet if you had your jobs taken from you, you were reprimanded for not being active enough. For allowing it to be taken from you, even if you were gone doing another task.

Every day was a fucked up game of Am I going to get yelled at today? Fired? Belittled?

Some days doing more earned you extra, other days you were told you didn't know your place and that it was selfish of you to take someone else's job.

After all, we all needed our work. Just if you did more, you earned more. You were constantly competing against your other coworkers with the possibility of losing it all. Every day was a gamble.

The worst was the night shift. No one wanted the night shift. 

"Aren't you going to eat? It's going to get cold" Delaney's voice shook me out of my head, my eyes focused on her as she timidly ate her food.

I bought a spoonful of what was considered warm comfort food to my mouth, silence falling between us until Delaney had had enough.

"What do you think of the soup? It's my Grandpas' favorite. He loved whenever my Grandma made it, and my dad really loves it; so my mom learned how to make it" She informed me, the new slip of information piquing my interest.

"Your grandpa?" I questioned, Delaney nodding.

I've never heard anyone utter anything about a grandfather.

"Yeah, he passed a while back" She shrugged, "Anyway, do you like it? I'm not like" She pauses, giggling to herself, my lips threatening to show a small smile at the sound, "I'm not forcing you to say you like it" She giggled again, "It's just, my mom wants to know what you like. What her and my Grandma should make more often. It sounded like I was trapping you in a corner, sorry" She grinned, "You must like the soup or else you're kicked off the premises, mister!" She mocked in a low tone voice, wiggling her head as she spoke, hands on her hips before giggling to herself.

"It tastes fine. I'm not too picky" I replied stoically, moving some of the soup around before scooping it up, placing a dumpling in my mouth when she spoke up again. 

"So, what do you like to have for dinner? You can request things, you know. You don't have to eat what we are. Mom's been nagging me about all the things you like, claiming that we hang out so much I should know" her eyes rolling as she inhaled.

"I'm not picky" I repeated, Delaney sighing, setting her spoon back in her bowl.

"You've got to give me something to work with Harry! The woman won't leave me alone. She doesn't understand that us hanging out isn't secret sharing, and more like you hating my existence" She huffed, grabbing her spoon again.

"I don't hate your existence" I told her, Delaney's brown eyes looking up from the soup; our eyes meeting before I looked away. "I just get frustrated, is all" I stated, wishing she'd go away so I could eat and breathe in peace without feeling like she was searing judgmental holes into every part of my body.

Silence fell between us again before Delaney once again spoke up.

"How are you on food? Do you need anything? Don't be afraid to ask us to pick up on stuff. Oh!, and if you want any like snacks or desserts, let me know! I make requests all the time!" She grinned, wiggling a little in the seat as her face lit up, "I made Wren these cupcakes right? They're her favorite! They're like a golden brown yellow cake mix, right? Cooked perfectly so it's all warm and moist but she likes a little crunch on the outside, so I use my darker baking pants to darken the edges like she likes and then I fill them with butterscotch buttercream in the center and I dip them into hot melting chocolates so the top is coated in this yummy milk chocolate! Ugh! They're to die for, Harry!" She groaned, her head thrown back with her eyes closed for a moment before she leaned forward, opening her eyes again. "I'm just saying, you can request things.'' She giggled, "I love trying new baking things. My dad loves Poppy Seed Muffins and I'm honestly getting tired of making the same thing every week" She sighed, scooping up more of her soup. 

"I'm good on food for now" I finally answered her question, watching her cheeks flush pink turn red as she rolled her lips in, murmuring "Sorry" making me let out a low chuckle as I ate more of the soup, tearing a piece of the roll apart.

"I have a tendency to ramble" She confessed, her spoon messing with her soup again; "I know that annoys you so uh.. just tell me to be quiet when I do that"

She sounded so deflated that it almost made me feel bad.

When did I say it bothered me? She looked cute, all excited and happy talking about it.

Wait

Cute?

No.

She's not cute.

She can't be cute.

She isn't allowed to be cute.

I don't have time for cute.

She has to be a ugly troll under a bridge for the rest of her life. I can't do cute, right now. Mr. Fallen will murder me if he finds out that I even for a moment thought his daughter was cute.

The one time I tried to mingle with an owner's daughter did not land in my favor, and since then, I've been working in a place where I did my best to avoid the daughters who thought I was "cute".

Delaney continued to talk, trying to engage conversation with me as she ate her dinner, leaving me perplexed.

Why is she conversing with me? The employers don't talk to the employees. I'm here purely for work. Just like they wanted me to be. It was made clear that they needed me; and what my job entailed, and that they'd do anything to have my help.

I knew what came along with being the help, and conversations over Chicken Dumpling soup with one of the owners daughter wasn't it.

"Oh my god!" Delaney groans, "You can't take me anywhere!" She laughed, her hand holding part of the fabric that was covering her stomach in-between her fingers where she had spilt on herself.

"You've uh.." I paused, Delaney looking over at me, "Um.." I pointed at her face, her head tilting, "Food, here" I motioned towards under my lip above my chin with my finger, her entire face turning red as she wiped her hand across her chin.

"Oh my god" She whined, "That's so embarrassing! I always do this! I should've known.." She trailed off, getting up out of the chair, grabbing a rag and wetting it before dabbing her shirt.

"Do what? Slop on yourself?" I asked, turning to face her, abandoning my food completely as I stared at the back of her.

I couldn't help but notice the way the shorts clung around her ass before falling towards her thighs; the band noticeably clinging to her wide hips due to her shirt being bunched up at her waist as she cleaned it.

When she moved to turn around, I quickly looked away, grabbing my food again and shoveling some more into my mouth, scraping the bottom of the bowl.

Delaney sat back down, her face still hued pink as she grabbed her bowl.

"Sorry. I didn't grow up in the classiest of households. I tend to uh.. be a bit messy, sometimes" She said, not daring to look me in the eye as she took a bite out of her roll.

"I'm used to cleaning up messes" I numbly replied, wishing it came out more in a teasing tone like intended, but my monotone voice slipped out instead making me mentally groan at myself.

I wish I could just relax. Let her in like she so clearly wants, but I can't. I don't know how.

She isn't someone I should mingle with. There are boundaries in place that give me a million reasons as to why letting her in would be a bad thing.

For starters;

I need this job.

We can't afford to let something as silly as a teasing comment cost me the money I'm earning.

I knew from the moment I met her that she wouldn't be like the Rickman girls. She fumbled too much and was too stuck in her own head to be sultry and purposefully seductive. Like she fumbled her way through life more than critically thought out her next move.

Even her stares never felt intentional. She never kept her eyes locked on me when I turned around; almost like she didn't want to get caught, unlike someone who was trying to purposefully seduce you.

I learned pretty quickly with the Rickman girls that eye contact can get uncomfortable within seconds. Especially when they're openly masturbating in front of an open window right where you're working.

It got uncomfortable the moment I realized what was happening, and then it just never stopped.

You'd think with the presumptions of the male species, I'd get turned on. Want to enter her room, help her out. Fulfill the fantasy; but when it isn't mutual, it's just downright awkward and uncomfortable.

Sure if it was my girlfriend, or wife, maybe I'd put on a show. But my employers' daughter? It made my skin crawl.

I'd be stupid not to notice the immediate differences between the girls. 

For starts; Delaney was heavier set than the Rickman girls. Which wasn't a bad thing, but it of course is one of the things you're taught to notice about people.

Their height, their weight, what they're wearing, the way their hair is styled. The way they smell, if they have straight white teeth or crooked stain ones.

You're taught to judge their appearance within seconds of meeting them.

Delaney seemed anxious when I first met her. She fiddled a lot. Was constantly daydreaming. Hard to have a conversation with; not like I wanted to in the first place.

Her dark hair was pin straight, cascading down her back. Light wash blue jeans covered her thick thighs, a tucked in pink shirt curved around her breasts and belly, hugging her hips as she rocked on her feet, looking like she was going to hurl the more her parents spoke.

The Rickman girls were a lot skinnier. Dark skin, dark hair, dark eyes, dark intentions. 

The moment I met them, I thought maybe we could be friends. I was used to seeing everyone all the time, talking with them whilst I worked; but that quickly changed.

Not only was Mr. Rickman on my ass all the time, along with Mrs. Rickman which was surprising, but their daughters were the least bit subtle when it came to making their intentions crystal clear. 

"Are you done?" Delaney asked, getting me to look up at her.

Her brown eyes screamed uncomfortable, a pang of guilt stinging inside of my chest.

Was it me? Did I make her uncomfortable?

She looked like she was trying to find any reason to slip out of the house they've lent to me; which was fine by me. I wasn't forcing her here. She invited herself here.

"Uh, Yeah. I'll just clean it real quick and you can take it back" I informed, standing up from my chair, grabbing the dishes and walking them to the sink.

"Harry, you don't have to. We have a dishwasher—" She started, my head shaking with disapproval as I turned on the tap, rinsing it before adding soap.

"I can clean my own messes" I reminded her, running the washcloth in the bowl.

"Harry" Delaney's soft voice piqued my ears' attention due to the silence that surrounded us. "You're not working. You're not earning your keep. We're just hanging out. You don't have to do your dishes to gain approval"

My body stiffened at her words before I quickly rolled out my shoulder blades, setting the clean dishes aside, turning to reach for hers, "It's fine" I replied, "I don't mind doing the dishes"

I regret ever telling her that I had to earn my keep. I knew the second it left my mouth that it was a mistake.

She sighed as I cleaned her things, stacking them into a neat pile before stacking them all together and handing them to her.

Delaney took the dishes, looking at me, then the dishware, then me again before her shoulders dropped and she gave a small nod.

"Thanks for letting me eat with you" She sighed, leaving the tiny house, allowing me room to breathe again.

I expected whatever this was to be a one and done type of thing, so the surprise I encased when she showed up at my door the next night, two plates in her hand made the skin between my brown wrinkle as I let her in; watching her set both plates down, moving to my cupboard, grabbing too cups before slipping something out from her back pocket that I didn't realize was there.

"Wait" I finally spoke, having watched her pull two glasses down before twisting open a bottle cap. "Was that in your pocket?" I questioned, Delaney giggling with a nod.

"It was pulling my jeans down!" She giggled, "It also barely fit. We need bigger pockets! I uh— you're not like, against alcohol, or something, right?" She asked, and that's when I noticed she had two Mike's Hard Lemonades.

"You don't need glasses for those" I stated, Delaney's head tilting before looking over her shoulder at me.

"Oh? You wanna drink straight from the bottle? I can get down with that" She grinned, putting the glasses back and grabbing the two bottles between her fingers, moving to set them down on the table.

"You're here again" I stated, Delaney nodding as she sat down.

"I am"

"Why?"

"Why not?" She countered back, picking up her fork, slicing into a porkchop. I stared for a second, watching her take a bite of the food before slowly walking over to where I sat. "Thanks for joining me" She grinned, a teasing twinkle in her eye as she cut another piece of the porkchop, dipping it into some sort of brown sauce.

"What's your motive?" I asked, not bothering to pick up the utensils until she tells me whatever game she's getting at.

This entire thing felt suspicious.

Dinner with me? The ranch hand? Two nights in a row? When she's never done this before? There has to be some sort of reason.

Her brow furrowed, "Motive?" She questioned, as if that was an absurd thought.

"Yes. Your motive" I confirmed, Delaney setting down her fork as her lips parted before pursed, pushing them to the side in a thinking manner, then relaxing.

"What do you think my motive is?" She played, her brows raised as she looked at me, followed by picking up her fork and cutting another piece of meat.

"I prefer to eat alone" I stated, Delaney's body tensing as she slowly chewed, swallowing with a small nod.

"You want me to leave?" She asked.

"No I just, I don't know." I sighed, frustrated with the mind games. "Why are you here?" I questioned, hating that she was making me flustered.

I can't remember the last time someone has made me stumble this much. It was aggravating me to no end.

I was used to working towards a goal. To have a reason. Her being here wasn't again tonight wasn't one of them and it was throwing a wrench into my routine; sending me for a loop as I tried to figure out what the sudden change was. 

If she wasn't quiet, she was yelling at me. Or laughing. Or telling me to go away. 

It was confusing.

She was always around, yet never seemed like she wanted to be there, even though I never asked her to be there. Maybe her dad had like the first day I arrived?

"I wanted to hang out with you, Harry. You're quite the loner" She hummed, taking a swig of the lemonade.

She wants to be here? Like I said, confusing.

"I'm not a loner" I huffed, "I just like being alone. There is a difference"

"Damn. Hit a nerve, did I?" She teased, my nostrils flaring, "Oh calm down, it's dinner. What's the worst that can happen? Mr. Harry Styles isn't alone for a full 24 hours?" She scoffed, repositioning her plate to reach the sides. "Anyways, how was your day? I've been busy out of my mind all day" She informed me, glancing up at me, waiting for a response.

"Was fine. Did my work" I numbly answered, Delaney nodding.

"My dad's been talking high praise of you lately. Saying you were worth the investment. You're allowing him time to go out and outsource more income. Although mom wishes you'd join us for dinner" She looked up at me over her plate, her brows raised.

"I'm fine alone" I repeated; indifferent about her invading my personal space.

"Harry" She sighed, and I knew I was in for whatever lecture was burning on the tip of her tongue. "You may think you're fine alone, but no one can ever truly be alone. We need socialization. You don't talk unless spoken to. We've invited you to join us for dinner because we want you there. You're not banned to these four walls. If you don't join us at least once for dinner so my mom can get off my ass about it; these one on one dinners are going to become a lot more frequent" She said, a smirk tugging at my lips.

I was right.

"So there is an ulterior motive" I replied smugly, Delaney's eyes rolling, sighing in defeat once again.

"I know that's what  it sounds like—"

"You're right" I interrupted, "That's exactly what it sounds like. It sounds like you're buttering me up so your mom will leave you alone"

"I'm not buttering you— Okay, stop. Listen. I'm here because I want to be. They think I'm eating out back with the bunnies— Don't ask" She warned, "Instead of sitting in here with you. I'm just bringing up that you're welcome to join family dinner. It isn't a big deal. You're talked about at the table anyway, might as well be there to hear what they're saying"

"I don't want to hear what they're saying" I stated, already knowing that if there was a problem, it would've been said already.

"Fine. Just know my mom won't let this go. She holds grudges like a mother" Delaney giggled, wiggling her eyebrows before taking another drink of the lemonade. "Anyway, what do you think of the lemonade? My sister Morgan brought it. I love lemonade and she claims everyone needs a drink or two here and there"

Morgan? She has another sister?

"Why aren't you eating with your family, Delaney?" I asked; exhausted.

I just wanted to be alone. To decompress from today. Instead, I sat at this tiny ass table with a girl who seemed to be playing chess whilst I'm playing checkers. 

 "Do you really want me to leave that badly?" She asked, sounding surprised that my statement of liking to eat alone held more truth than expected.

"I'm tired, Delaney. I want to eat my food in silence. Get ready for me, and be unconscious until my alarm goes off at four fifteen" 

"Jesus Christ, four fifteen?"

"Delaney. Whatever it is you're getting at, get there. I'm too fucking tired to try and decode whatever is going on" I snapped, hating the way she flinched as her nose twitched; glancing away from me.

"There is no ulterior motive, Harry. Sure it seems like I'm begging you to go to a family dinner. I'm just relaying the information. I can respect your boundaries if you do not want to come. Why do you think no one has forced you?" She asked, looking ready to keep talking when I interrupted her.

"You're here. In my personal space. That I requested. You're forcing yourself on me either way" 

She stared at me for a moment before nodding slowly.

"Okay. I apologize for not respecting your boundaries. I'll leave" She excused herself, reaching for her lemonade and plate, scooting out of the chair and turning to leave.

I heard the clink of the bottle being set on the counter as she opened the door before grabbing it again and walking out, leaving the door wide open.

I growled as I exhaled, getting up to close the door only to see her walking down the road instead of turning left, back down the pathway that led to the main house.

Why isn't she going home? 

I stood in the doorway for a few seconds, watching her trail down the dirt road before turning left and sitting down in the grass.

What is she doing?

I slowly closed my door, going to sit back at my table, only to look out the kitchen window and see two big white dogs were next to her now and she appeared to be talking, before handing them something.

I couldn't help but stare at her as I ate dinner, watching her eat her own food, drinking her lemonade and petting the big white giant ass dog that I rarely saw.

As I was washing my dish, I watched her get up, the dogs following her up the dirt driveway, headed towards the main house. The second she was out of view, I felt a tightness in my chest as I realized I could no longer see what she was doing; nor ask why she sat with two dogs instead of joining her family.

The following night I awaited my food to come, feeling an anticipation swirl around in my stomach as I awaited Delaney's' presence, The knock on the door making dopamine rush through me as I opened the door, only to be met with a girl I've never seen before holding a plate of food and a bowl of what looked to be some sort of vegetables mixed into potatoes.

"Your dinner" She said and I nodded, grabbing the food, watching her turn around and walk away before I could even think about saying something; leaving me standing gobsmacked in the entrance of my home.

I couldn't help but think; Delaney would never.

* * * * 

I've redone this chapter so many times. I should be committed into an insane asylum for this chapter alone🤪

For how many times I've read through this, there better not be any errors lol

Written on: September 28th 2023

Published on: September 28th 2023

Word Count: 4.3k

I chewed on the inside of my lip as I fought the urge to hide my legs.

Should I have worn pants?

But it's hot out. Sweltering even. If I had worn jeans, they would've chaffed my thighs, or stuck to my skin, and or even ripped. Shorts felt like the best option for functionality.

Harry stayed silent and I sighed, debating if I should change or not.

I waffled for a few seconds before deciding to screw him and just stay in my shorts.

Who was he to tell me what to wear? If he didn't like my thick thighs he can get lost. He's here to help us, not the other way around.

"Alright, well" I I sighed, glancing down at Milo, giving him a quick pet before moving to walk in front of Harry, Milo following me, knowing it was breakfast time. "We better get working" I continued, my back to him. "First step is the barn so I can feed the dogs and cats and show you where certain feeds are"

Harry and I opened the big barn doors, a smile plastered to my face as I was met with our beautiful horses; the grin quickly vanishing when the waft of horse manure filled my nostrils.

Yuck.

"Welcome to Fallen Ranch!" I laughed, ready to joke that the work was about to begin, but once again, Harry was hot on my heels with his reply.

"Oh, I thought it was fall in. Like fallin' apart" He.. joked? I think it was a joke? Was it not? He was joking right?

I frowned, "Falling a part?" I asked, Harry nodded as he looked around the barn. "That's rude" I grumbled, moving over to a workbench that was against one of the walls; a stack of food bowls ready to be filled.

I started laying them out in front of me, reaching for the scoop in the dog food bag, ready to pour it in when our bitch of a cat jumped onto the workbench.

"Keep your nasty paws out of Leo's food!" I scolded, scooping the calico cat off my work bench and gently tossing her to the floor, "Dogs first you little brat" Sassy mowed at me, jumping back up, "Sass-a-frass! You're a freeloader! You don't do shit around here— DON'T EAT THAT!" I yelled, her head dipped into Opal's food bowl. "Oh my god" I groaned, beginning to feel overwhelmed.

"What the hell are you yelling about?" Harry grumbled, opening one of the horse stalls that lead to the fenced in outdoor grazing area, starting to let out the horses for the morning.

"My sister's bitch of a cat is eating my dog's food" I grumbled, my eyes widening when the work bench wobbled, Knox's front paws resting on the edge. "Get down!" I scolded, Knox immediately jumping down, my hand grabbing the cat and removing her yet again. "Can you help me, please?" I asked, wanting to get these dogs fed before it all landed on the floor from either Knox or Sassy.

"That is not a part of my job description" he snapped back

"Yeah well shoving my foot up your ass isn't mine either but the days still early!" I snapped, having had enough of everyone's attitudes.

I like to think I'm a pretty patient person, but my fuse runs short when the cause is days, if not weeks long.

Everyone has a snapping point, right?

"Days still young" he replied, leaning against one of the wooden support beams in the barn, watching me.

"What?"

"It's "Days still young" Days still early just sounds stupid" He corrected, pushing the right button to make me give any less of a fuck than I thought was possible.

What's this guys problem?

"You know what?" I huffed, immediately getting interrupted before I could continue.

"What? Enlighten me" Harry replied, not missing a beat as the forming smirk popped a dimple yet again.

I swear my eyes had hearts in them, even though I wanted to shove him out of my way and never see him again.

How can one be so cocky and disrespectful?

I swear I'd walk miles for this man with sores on the bottom of my feet, and it still wouldn't be enough.

"I don't need your help anyway. I was doing' just fine without you" I finished, setting down Knox's food bowl since he was right here before setting down the others all holding Sassy in my arm, ringing the food bell and waiting for the four legged little helpers to come get breakfast.

"If I recall, your family desperately hired me because of how much you needed me" he smirked, his egotistical aura making me want to scream.

Why did I think he was to die for again?

"So you feed off the poor?" I questioned, the ick starting to form deep down, even as his stupid dimple popping smirk wanted to make me do irrational things to him.

Harry's arms crossed over his chest and his lips formed a line, "Aren't you supposed to be showing me around? Isn't that your job?" He emphasized, apparently ready to move on from a conversation I was very ready to have.

This man was infuriating in an annoyingly sexy way that it was truly starting to piss me off.

I walked him through the barn, showing him where everything way; Harry adding Hay to the troughs whilst I put in fresh water.

The bucket of manure always made me gag, even when I was a kid; thankfully I ran away before he could try and make that my problem.

"How many damn dogs do y'all have?" Harry asked, his tone causing a frown to tug at my lips as Harlow, Knox, Daphine and Milo gathered, eager to work.

"They come in pairs of two, besides the Pyrenees. There are three. Knox and Harlow are the cattle herders" I explained, climbing over the fence much to Harlow's dismay, "Grab the shovel, we got shit to clean up, literally" I laughed, wobbling slightly as the heel of my ankle boot got caught on the top of the barbed wire fence almost sending me straight into a pile of cow poop, Harry's chuckle was heard over my instinctive shriek of horror and disgust as my heart dropped to my stomach. "You could've helped ya know"

"Why would I do that?" He asked as I watched my step, my nose wrinkling at the smell.

People say when you live on a farm you get used to all the smells; but that was never my truth.

"Because a decent human thing to do when someone is falling is try and help them" I huffed, seeing out of the corner of my eye, our female Border Collie's front paws on the fence. "Harlow, wait" I instructed, showing her the palm of my hand, silently telling her to stay.

"Here, you can do that whilst I feed them" Harry said, dangling the pooper scooper shovel over the fence, ignoring my comment about human decency. Typical.

"Why can't I feed them?" I argued, really not wanting to clean up cow poop in my white ankle boots.

"Your farm" He shot back, still holding out the shovel.

My brow raised, "You're the rancher. If I recall, picking up shit is apart of your job"

"Then why are you the one in the pen, and I'm the one over here?" he smirked. I swear my knees buckled a little when his dimple popped yet again.

God the things I'd give to lick it, or kiss it.

His pink lips looked so inviting.

I could feel my body start to become mush. The inside of my stomach felt all warm and gooey as my knees metaphorically buckled; ready to give in at any moment.

God damnit! Get a grip Delaney!

Can't you focus more on how frustratingly annoying he is? And less on how kissable he looks right now? I mentally scolded, but the thought of kissing him made me start to wander again.

I bet he gives the best kisses. Sweet, warm, just enough passion to make you yearn for me; knowing his asshole tendencies, he'd leave you to suffer though. Tease you. Make you want more.

His big strong arms would hold you so soft and tight. Comfort and protect you in all the heartwarming ways. His green eyes would look at you so lovingly it would hurt.

"Delaney" Harry grumbled, the shovel clattering against the fence, startling me.

"Whatever" I huffed, quickly recovering as I turned around, "Get moving. We got a lot to do"

"Why do you daydream so much?" Harry asked, his eyes squinting at me.

"None of your business" I grumbled, shockingly choosing to scoop up poop over talk to Harry.

Five minutes into cleaning the pen, I grimaced with a shriek, my white ankle boot covered in a dark brown sludge that I knew all too well.

God damnit!

"You've got to be kidding me" I grumbled, dragging the sole of my against the dirt, knowing damn well I shouldn't have worn white shoes.

I wasn't supposed to be cleaning the pen today though. I was supposed to show this dreamy muscle man where everything was, preparing him to work for us before going off to help with my actual job! Now my shoes are covered in disgusting cow poop!

I heard a chuckle next to me, my head whipping up to find Harry's sparkling green eyes and annoying sexy dimple mocking me as I tried my best to get the cow poop off my shoe.

"How's it going?" he asked, a teasing undertone to his words. Or.. maybe he was mocking me in an aggravating manner? It sounded like he was teasing me, but maybe he was ready to explode on me at any given minute.

"Shove it, Harry" I groused, my eyes prickling with tears as my pushed down emotions began to bubble over.

I can't fucking cry in front of him! It'll give him just another reason to make fun of me!

I kept my head down, leaving the shovel against the fence before letting Harlow and Knox in to help move the cows to the other fenced area for grazing.

"Just open the gate, they'll get them in and then close and lock it and bring the borders back to the main house. I'll be right back, I need to clean my shoes" I spoke quickly, wanting to get the instructions out before the knot in my throat grew too big that I couldn't suppress my emotion any longer.

The second I slipped my once white shoes off, bending down to carefully pick them up by the collar of the shoe with a grimace, the slow hot tears started falling one by one down my only what I can assume pink cheeks as I rushed to the bathroom to try and save my shoes from landing in the trash.

I struggled to clean them off with my watery vision, but thankfully I managed, leaving them in the tub to air dry as I took a quick glance at myself in the mirror, praying I looked presentable enough to go finish helping Harry.

My full rose cheeks were bright pink, along with my nose and eyes. My face had damp tear stains; my hands quickly swiped them away.

There was no fixing this.

Fuck.

Slipping on my worn down cowgirl boots, I met back up with Harry; his eyes narrowed at me, like he was trying to place me from somewhere, but I ignored him, "Ready to finish the tour?" I asked, Harry taking a few seconds before nodding.

I showed him where the sheep were; showing him how the locks worked, mentioning they all had to be replaced eventually.

"The sheep get fed three times a day" I started, Harry interrupting me yet again.

One can argue his habits are more annoying than my daydreaming ones.

"I know how to care for sheep" he stated and I nodded slowly, deciding to just drop it and let us both do our jobs.

I commented that we do sheer them at least once a year, my lips pursing, feeling like everything I was telling him was going in one ear, out the other.

I couldn't tell if it's because he didn't care, and truly already knew how to do everything; maybe my dad has walked him through it already? If that was the case, surely my dad wouldn't have asked me to do this then, right? And wouldn't Harry have said something about my dad showing him already?

Was it because I was a woman, and this was a "man's" job? I scoffed at the thought, feeling my lovey dovey rose colored glasses turn cold dark and gray.

Surely that isn't it, right? He couldn't be sexist, right?

With the sheep's out in their fenced in field, I took him over to the garden, smiling at our flourishing plants.

"This is our garden!" I grinned, the feeling of pride washing over me as I watched him look around; "It's my grandma's favorite part of the farm. She's tended to this garden for decades" I told, "We love using stuff from our garden to cook with, or to feed the horses and stuff. If you ever need anything, feel free to help yourself! My grandma comes out almost daily to harvest since our bunnies sometimes like to swipe stuff" I paused, cupping my hands around my mouth as I began to whisper loudly, "Even though she literally gave them their own garden patch by their hutch" I grinned, watching Harry crack a smile, sending my stomach swirling once again.

God the things I'd do to see that on a daily basis.

I took him over to the bunny hutch, noticing a few of them out in their fenced area.

"This one is Lydia" I pointed at the one near us, "She's mine. She's a Holland Lop" I smiled over at him, bending over the fence to give her a little pet, "The gray and black one over there" I pointed to the far corner, "Are the neighbor girls. They like to visit and see them but their family doesn't have room for them. So uh, if you see 2 tween looking girls on the Ranch, It's probably Sarah and Fiona" I informed, "Want to pet her? Lydia's super friendly!"

"I'm good" He stayed stoic.

Party Pooper.

"Well I want to hang out with her for a while" I stated, not ready to leave my bunny. "I got her when she was really young which was fun" I decided to tell him, entering their pen and taking a seat in the grass, smiling when Lydia hopped over to me. "She always comes over because I typically bring her snacks" I giggled, watching her cute pink nose flutter.

Getting distracted with the bunnies, I heard Harry's familiar, "What the fuck!" making my head shoot up, seeing him scowling down at his cowboy boots again.

"What?" I asked, confused as I pushed myself up off the ground, careful not to step on Lydia.

"What is with your fucking animals biting me!" He shouted, my eyes widened yet again. I swear they were going to get stuck like that.

I noticed Charles, "our" duck next to Harry.

I snickered, Harry glaring at me.

"It's not funny! These are expensive! You still owe me for your fucking rat of a dog leaving marks!" His brow furrowed, the scowl only making my giggle turn into a laugh.

"I think they like you" I teased, "This is Charles. he's our duck"

"Your duck?"

"Well, a duck" I corrected, "I mean, we don't own him.. but he hangs around here. He has a duck wife and ducklings of his own" I told him, surprised Charles wandered over to us.

Usually my younger brothers were chasing the ducks by the pond, so maybe nipping Harry was payback.

I giggled again, thinking about the duck being spiteful, Harry's glare deepening.

"This is why you don't own animals" he huffed, marching away from the duck who was waddling after him, my grin never leaving my face as I giggled, watching a grown ass man get chased by a duck.

"Animals bring joy to your life!" I countered, "Just like kids"

"No" his head shook, "They bring chaos"

"But isn't that fun? Life's boring if it's so routine all the time"

"Routine isn't boring. It's orderly" Harry corrected, turning to face me again.

"Again, borrring" I dragged out, a big smile on my face as I teased him.

I stand by it though. Who wanted to spend all day doing chores? That's the shit you get done so you can go have fun!

When the time came to milk the cows, Harry and I reached the warehouse-like area we used for it.

"They just.. go in?" He asked, seeming impressed that the cows did it in such an orderly fashion.

"Mhm. They like it. Think of it like your morning pee. It's reliving, plus, they get fed after" I noted, slipping on my gloves. "Right here" I pointed to the wall on my left, "Is how you clean the materials. We'll get to that, but just in case you forget"

Harry scoffed, telling me off, "I won't forget, I'm a professional" which only made me roll my eyes at his cocky attitude.

Can't this man ever just accept that not everything is routine? Some things have to be new and take a learning curve?

We got to our first cow, and I sat down on the stool, this entire process feeling like muscle memory, having done it with my dad so many times in the last 26 years.

"So, if god forbid, a machine is broken, this is what you do" I looked up from the cow, seeing that Harry was surprisingly paying attention like my words actually mattered.

This is new.

I couldn't help but feel my heart smile at the idea of me mattering to him. Even if it was as silly as how to milk a cow, it still made me happy that it appeared that he cared.

"Okay, so she is eating her hay right now, so she couldn't honestly give less of a fuck" I giggled, moving my bucket. "Come here and hold this bucket" I demanded, surprising him since he quickly moved. "Grab that stool, take a seat, stay a while" I joked, handing him the sterile bucket we use to catch the milk. "So, these are her udders" I chuckled, glancing over at Harry, expecting a chuckle or maybe even sexual innuendo, but his eyes were just locked on the cow. "They are clipped, as you can see here" I showed, "We keep our cows healthy" I commented, hoping he knew we did not stand for animal abuse or neglect here.

"Clipped?" he asked, surprising me.

I nodded, "You clip them to keep them clean"

"How do you clip udders?"

"Well, there are two ways. You see here, how her udders are just skin?" I asked, Harry nodding, "That's because we've shaved the hairs to keep her udders healthy and not have bacteria etcetera. My dad prefers to manually shave them. We only have a few cows after all, but the other method is singeing with fire. If done properly, it works well, but we don't like to risk possibly burning their skin or something"

"You.. hold fire? To the cow?" Harry sounded bewildered, staring at me like I have three heads.

"It's a way to do it, yes. Anyway, we do keep up on that, and I'm sure my dad can show you when the time comes, but for now, don't worry about it. Oh! Also, make sure the area is clean" I grab the paper towel, "You kind of just... swipe? At the udder? Uh, here, let me show you" I cleaned around the udder, noticing some dirt and what looked like grass, "Don't use water" I warned, "It can prevent the teat from opening"

"Tit?"

"Teat"

"Cows have tits? Is that why people refer to nipples as tits?" Harry asked, my eyes closing as my head turned out of shameful withheld laughter.

"It's a teat, and uh, I guess. Women's nipples and cow's teats produce milk" I chuckle, pulling myself together so I can focus. "Step one, you put on gloves. Keep everything clean and sterile. They're all over the place around here. Let us know if you need a different size" Harry nodded, "So, the step two once you're gloved is to prep the teat. You take this" I grabbed our pre drip solution, "You want to cover the four teats with it for at least 30 seconds. You do one at a time"

I could feel Harry intently paying attention, even with how in the zone I got, wanting to do this properly.

"Next, you grab the udder like this" I wrapped my hand around it, "You squeeze slightly downward.. kind of half twist? You don't want to like.. ring out the udder, but kind of guide the liquid out? I uh.." My cheeks flushed, "You've um.."

Delaney, no! Stop!

"Hm?"

"You've uh.. um.."

Delaney, seriously! Don't!

"I've what?" Harry asked, my slight squirming not helping as mental imagery flashed through my head.

"You uh.. you know how you uh.. um.."

"How I..?"

Oh my god

You're fucked!

Totally completely fucked!

You did this to yourself!

You couldn't just shut up and think of a better example?!

This is definitely not how your father taught you!

"So uh, you know when you um.. masturbate?" I rushed, "You kinda.. do a similar motion" I refused to make eye contact with the man. I can't. I won't. I refuse. "Just uh.. slowly.. like.. like edging"

DELANEY NICOLE FALLEN, YOU DID NOT JUST SAY THAT

I could feel the heat radiating off my face.

I can't believe I just said that.

I did not just bring up Harry masturbating whilst I have my hand wrapped around a cow udder.

Oh my god.

The rest of the explanation only got worse as the liquid began to drip out into the bucket, unacceptable mental images of Harry doing things I should definitely not be thinking about whilst I'm milking a cow, Harry right next to me, refused to leave my head.

I've never wanted to run out of a room quicker in my life, and it was my own damn fault!

I thought it couldn't get worse, but the redness in my cheeks stayed put as Harry took place on the stool, his own hands gloved as he began to prep the next cow to try doing it himself.

I slowly walked him through it again, his hand wrapping around the udder, with a soft chuckle and head shake, softly confessing, "I wish you didn't compare this to masturbating"

You and I are both, buddy.

I'd say it's a safe assumption that I want to simply forget today ever happened.

* * * * 

I listened to Lacy by Olivia Rodrigo the entire time I wrote this lol

Written on: September 9th, 10th, 11th 2023

Published on: September 11th 2023

Word Count: 4.2k

"Well, not really. He sort've kicked me out; and honestly Wren, I think the first time was a fluke. I think he wants me to leave him alone, and I need to respect that. We can't lose him" I sighed, wishing I could just outright ask if he liked me at all, even if it went nowhere; but the fear of rejection - even at 26, and the likeness of him fleeing was too much of a warning sign that I needed to tread carefully.

"I just think you need to keep shoving yourself at him. Obviously, not in a way that's going to get you hurt, or upset him... but like, be around? Ya know? Befriend the loner" She said with a teasing undertone.

I groaned, feeling like we were going to go in circles.

Instead of replying, I just nodded and sighed, letting the silence fall between us.

All day I had an internal conflict about if I should just pretend Harry never existed, or if I should put more effort into it. It was a blurry line I was dancing on.

I was struggling to find an organic way for our paths to cross, the evenings being the only open area I could mess with, yet he likes to eat alone. So how was I supposed to try and hang out with him?

We're both busy all day long, there is no room for me to wiggle myself into his day even if it was to be his friend like Wren suggested.

"What if I cooked him dinner?" I asked Wrenlynn; following behind her through the market as we accumulated the things off my Grandma's shopping list.

"You threw a whole fit about how he eats alone" She numbly replied, my dreadful sigh making her look at me, "What? It's true"

"But, he can eat alone. I said make dinner. Not eat it with him"

Wrenlynn stopped, turning to look at me, "Delaney, what's the purpose of that?" 

"To hang out with him?" I questioned, confused. 

I thought that was obvious?

She suggested I be his friend. Isn't this literally her advice?

"Laney, I love you. You know that. I support you being happy, and loved, and successful. I just.. I don't want you to get hurt, okay? I know I was practically shoving him at you, but he seems troubled, Lane. I don't think overdoing it on your end is going to end well for you. Mom likes making dinner, Harry eats it. What's the point of doing all the work to just hand it over? At least mom gets a family dinner. I think you need to be there, but give him space." My face fell, Wren's facial features softening, "Delaney, I want you happy, and healthy, okay? If that's something he can give you, go for it, but don't let him walk all over you. Don't let him use you and don't let your overthinking lead you down the wrong path"

I frowned, "It's just dinner, Wren"

"It always is, Lane. You saw how beat up Morgan was with her ex. I just, I don't want that for you. Just be careful, please?" 

"Always am"

We carried ourselves throughout the store when a lightbulb went off in my head.

"Cowboy Casserole" I blurted, Wren turning to look at me, her brow furrowed.

"What?"

"What if I made him Cowboy Casserole?" I suggested, mentally figuring out all the ingredients I'd need.

"How is you making food for him any different than mom making food for him?"

"Because it'd be from mom" I stated the obvious.

"I thought the purpose was to spend time together?"

"God, Wren! Throw me a bone here!" I urged, Wren's eyes rolling.

"You do you, Laney. Just be careful"

"I'm trying here! You said be his friend! Isn't this friendly?" I scrunch my face, frustrated by the whiplash that was my sister.

Her eyes rolled, "You seem like a desperate girl trying to impress a guy with her cooking skills. Being a friend isn't making him a five course meal with the hopes of him eating you out for dessert at the end"

My eyes widened as I smacked her arm, "Wrenlynn! We are in public! I don't need to be the talk of the town" I hissed.

"Chill, no one is around. Plus, you don't like being in the kitchen? Why are you wanting to make him dinner?" 

"He needs to eat right?" I shot back, wincing slightly.

"How considerate" She snickered.

We continued walking, collecting our ingredients, and I decided to say fuck it and make Harry dinner anyway.

Who cares how it comes across. He'll at least be fed, which was a rule he made.

I carried my ingredients into the kitchen, seeing the clock read 4:39pm.

Pulling out a pan, I started browning the ground beef, listening to the ruckus that was my family members walking in and out of the house.

"What are you making?" My younger brother Keegan asked, hoping up on the barstool.

"Nothing"

"Doesn't smell like nothing" he shot back, an annoying smirk evident in his tone.

"It's not for you, so it doesn't matter" 

"What is it?"

"Cowboy Casserole"

"Oooooo" His voice peaked.

"Don't even think about it" I shot down, draining the grease from the meat before pouring it into a baking pan.

"Why can't I have any?" He huffed, climbing on the chair and leaning over the counter, getting closer to my food.

"Because it isn't for you"

"Then who's it for?"

"None of your business"

"Tell me!" Keegan whined as I pulled out a cutting board to chop up some green beans onto smaller pieces.

"No. Go away" I huffed, rinsing the fresh produce and placing it on the cutting board.

"Since when do you cook?" He asked as I started the chop the green vegetable.

"Don't you have chores to do? Or homework?" I grumbled, sliding the cut green beans into the pan.

"Nope!" He grinned, knowing damn well he was annoying me.

Aren't little brothers great? Sigh.

"Mom's gonna be pissed if your dirty clothes aren't in the laundry room" I reminded him.

Mom hated searching the house for the clothes, so if it wasn't in the laundry room it wasn't getting washed; little younger boys were really bad about doing it until they were almost out of things to wear.

Keegan's eyes widened as he scurried off the barstool, rushing down the hallway.

Ah. Peace and quiet.

I finished adding the cut carrots and the corn; pulling out a can of chicken noodle soup to pour over it when another voice was heard, followed by the slam and rickety hinged storm door.

"God have I had a damn day" Morgan huffed, taking the bar stool that was recently abandoned.

So much for peace and quiet.

"Why? What happened?" I humored, mixing the soup around in the pan before popping open a bag of tater tots.

"What are you making?"

Oh my god

"Nothing"

"Smells weird"

"What do you mean? Mom used to make it"

Morgan's nose wrinkled. "Maybe it's just the pregnancy. It doesn't smell good" She huffed, my eyes rolling. Then leave? "Anyway—"

Morgan proceeded to tell me about how hard it is to do shit whilst you're pregnant, followed by the complaints of doing the simple task of walking. Apparently our driveway was too long.

With the dish in the oven, I cleaned up after my mess just in time for my dad and one of the barn cats to stroll in; my dad covered in dirt.

"I'm showering, no one flush the toilet or use the dishwasher or you're going to be in for it!" He called out, walking down the hallway.

The storm door opened once again; the annoyance that was probably seeping out of me would be a clear warning sign for anyone but my family.

"Whatcha makin' now, Laney?" Wren asked, sitting down next to Morgan whom opened her big fat mouth before I could.

"Dinner that we can't have"

"Ooh" She dragged out,  "For the cowboy?"

"The cowboy?" Morgan questioned, my eyes shooting daggers towards my twin sister.

"Laney here—" 

"Wrenlynn, shut up" I warned, wanting to smack the smirk right off her face.

"Lane has a crush on the new rancher" She said anyway, my body collapsing against the counter as my arms stretched out and head rested against the cool countertop.

I hate my life.

"Oooo! The guy I had to give dinner to?" Morgan asked, a hum followed up by Morgan.

Can the ground swallow me whole? Surely I've already dug my grave at some point in my 26 years of life.

"You like him, Lane?" Morgan's brow furrowed, judgment evident on her face.

Here we go.

"She's smitten" Wrenlynn egged on, my head whipping up to glare at her.

"Shut up, Wren. It's none of your business. What are you? Twelve?" I snapped; Wren grinning, pissing me off as Morgan continued.

"He didn't seem very nice Lane. I've heard he's very arrogant" Morgan put in her two cents; as if I asked for it.

"What's wrong with having self worth?" I questioned, Morgan's head shaking.

"Having self worth and being full of yourself are two different things. Remember The Housley's talking about how his rate was outrages?! What did dad even pay him to begin with? We're broke as it is. He's just milking us for everything we're worth" She scoffed, clearly having distaste for a man she's never talked to.

"I'm sure he has his reasons, and honestly, he's deserving of it. He knows his worth and he uses it"

"But what about the occasional helping hand? Doing it out of the goodness of your heart? He's greedy Delaney; and arrogant, and quite frankly rude"

"Rude?!" My mouth gaped. Wren watching us like we were the best reality tv show out there.That sneaky bitch. "You delivered food. That's it. You can't take tired for rude. He's not very talkative" I defended, Wrenlynn snorting; my head whipping to face her, "What?" I snapped, before glaring, "You know what, no. Screw you both! I didn't put myself in this situation! Wrenlynn, you're my least favorite person today. I hope mom serves you cold peas and Morgan? Stop fucking judging people based off one interaction" I snapped, quickly exiting the kitchen towards my bedroom.

I heard Wrenlynn yell out, "Gonna need some ice for that burn!" Only making my blood boil even more.

What was their fucking problem?

So what if I liked a guy who maybe can be rude to outsiders; or knows his worth and uses it two his advantage? It's not like they're saints themselves! Who knows why he needs the money. It's not like he's living in a really nice house on his own property! Why is it such a big deal if I make dinner for him? Part of his contract is he has a fresh warm meal each night. He never said it had to come from my mom.

My trickle of tear drops quickly became a full sob as I laid in my bed hurt, overwhelmed, and flat out tired of everyone's opinions.

I'm not a child anymore. I can make my own choices; whether they like it or not. 

A knock on my door followed by a whine made me groan, yelling for whoever it is to come in as I wiped at my face.

"Lane?" My dad's voice called out before he walked through the door, Opal right behind him, ready to hop on my bed and provide snuggles. "You're crying pretty hard in here. You alright?" He asked, shutting my door behind him, standing in front of the closed door; a look of concern searing into me.

"I'm fine" I mumbled, accepting Opal's love and affection.

"Would you like to talk about it? Maybe vent? I can offer some possible solutions if you want?" he offered, my head shaking. "Alright. I'm sorry you're upset, honey. My ears are always ready if you need to talk, okay?" He reminded me and I nodded, hiding my face in my beloved Bernese Mountain Dogs fur.

"I love you" I murmured into Opal's neck, running my hands through her thick fluffy black fur. "I know, you hate seeing me sad" I giggled, feeling her warm wet tongue lick against my skin. "You're such a good girl" I sighed, staring into her beautiful brown eyes. "If only animals could talk. I'd have so many more friends"

Opal was getting older. She's a retired working dog; she helped pull carts on the farm, helping us transport stuff. With her old age came medical issues which contributed to her lack of energy, so for the best interest in her, she is now simply a family bet who loves to be a rug on your floor, steal scraps you may have dropped whilst cooking, and offers the best hugs whenever you're feeling down.

She truly was one of my favorite dogs, and it saddens me to think about losing her.

Eventually the timer rang and I grudgingly got out of my bed, pulling out the hot casserole to let it cool.

Am I crossing boundaries again? Is this a bad idea? Am I chasing him away?

 "What did you make Lane?" Grandma asked, opening the fridge and pulling out a covered bowl.

"Cowboy casserole?" I stated, although it sounded more like a question as I prepared for 20 questions.

"Sounds yummy. Wasn't your mom and dad doing steaks? Did the plans change?" She asked, reaching up to fix her headband that held back her short, fluffy, silver hair.

"No, they're doing steaks. I uh, need to just um.." shit, how to I tell her I need to take this to Harry without telling her I need to take this to Harry?

"Are you joining us for dinner?" She asked, ignoring my stumbling.

"I um.. yes, I believe so" I stumbled once again.

"Then what's that?" She nodded towards the steaming hot casserole.

Shit. Would Harry have rather had steak? He would've, wouldn't he.

"Oh um.. just uh.. meal prepping for this week ya know? Busy helping Mimi. Gotta make sure we have something grab and go" I lied straight through my teeth.. or did I?

Should I just deliver the steak and potatoes to Harry?

"That's smart. Your grandpa used to do that. He hated packing lunch" She chuckled, a soft smile filling my cheeks.

Grandma doesn't talk about Grandpa very often. Especially when they got divorced, but ever since he died, he's become a sore, sad topic; so I welcomed the topic with open arms whenever I could.

Dinner time rolled around; my dad bringing in the freshly grilled steaks as Morgan, my mom and grandma finished up on the sides.

"I'll dish Harry's plate in a moment, Delaney" Mom informed, Wrenlynn quickly chiming in with the fact of "Laney made him dinner", mom looking up from the cutting board, questioning me.

"I um.. burned it. Steak's fine" 

"See! I told you you can't cook" Wren laughed, chin quivering a little as I nodded.

"I uh — yeah. You were right" I muttered, watching dad place a steak on the white plate, followed by mom adding sides and a napkin; sending me on my way.

Since when did I become the designated delivery service? Not that I'm complaining..

I knocked on the door, staring at my sneakers when I heard an "It's open!" yelled from the other side.

God damnit.

I was really hoping I could just hand the plate off and be on my merry way.

Shuffling inside, I gently closed the door behind me and just stood on the welcome mat; not wanting to take off my shoes.

"I uh.. have your dinner?" I stuttered, huffing at the fact I could hear my voice wobble.

He's just another person, Delaney. He has to eat too.

"Sorry" Harry said, walking out of the bathroom in dark sweatpants and a red tight t-shirt. Water droplets from his hair fell onto the fabric covering his shoulders, Harry running his fingers through it before looking over at me — our eyes met, then the plate.

"You're here" He stated, licking his lips.

"I am" I nodded.

"You weren't here the past few days" He continued, to which I nodded again; not offering a deeper explanation.

"Your dinner" I held out the plate, Harry's brow furrowing before he relaxed his face, taking the plate and sitting down.

He looked back at me as he sat, lips pursed, picking up his knife and fork.

I guess I should go.

I turned on my heel, twisting the knob when I heard; "Why?"

What?

I looked over my shoulder, "Why, what?"

There was silence for a moment.

"Why weren't you here?" he finally asked.

"You said you wanted to be alone" I stated the obvious, confused why we were doing this song and dance.

Doesn't he want to eat his dinner in peace like he asked? Shouldn't I be leaving now?

"I said I liked eating alone" He corrected, my shoulders dropping in defeat.

"Why is that?" I questioned, rocking slightly on my feet.

"Why is what?" he hummed, taking a bite of his steak.

Alright, this is getting annoying.

"Why do you like eating alone?" I asked in my best — my patience isn't running thin —voice.

He just stared at me. Blank stare. No emotions or thoughts behind those beautiful green eyes.

A few seconds passed and I turned around, opening the door, expecting him to stop me; but he didn't. He let me walk out the door. 

I walked back into the kitchen, racing thoughts of what  could possibly be through his head getting drowned out by the conversations my family were having, already eating.

"Did he say if  it was cooked how he liked it?" Dad asked, my head  shaking, "Ask him when you see him next, please" 

"Why can't you ask him?" I snapped, taking my seat at the table.

Dad's head tilted, "Because I'm going out of town tomorrow morning"

Oh

"Out of town? For what? What does that mean for all the chores—"

"We hired Harry for that reason, Delaney" He interrupted.

"No. We hired him to help us. Not take over. What about your jobs?" I asked, my mom side eyeing us before continuing her talk with Grandma, Wren and Mimi.

"Delaney, it's one weekend—"

"We're not the Rickman's!" My voice raised, "We can't do th—"

"Damnit Delaney! It's one weekend! We need the money so we can fucking pay him! I don't know what else to tell you" Dad snapped, everyone going quiet.

"We can't overwork him!" I argued back, knowing that picking up dads slack means even longer days.

Dad took a deep breath, eyeing my mother then looking at me, "It's one weekend. He'll live"

"Does he know that you're leaving?" I questioned, feeling my blood boil. How can he just leave everything to Harry? "What about the hoof cleaning at the neighbors?"

"Yes, he knows; and they've assigned someone else to it for the weekend" He told me, my cheek between my teeth becoming sore from how hard I was biting it.

"So we're losing money there, too? Where are you even going?" I pressed, confused why no one has told me anything. "Is it just you going?"

"I'm going to the homestead near Fawn Lake" 

Fawn Lake? That's three hours away!

"For the weekend?"

"For the weekend" He confirmed and I just nodded slowly.

I continued to grill him. Asking how much he's making; to which he said he doesn't know yet since it's hourly. I guess he's doing some sort of maintenance and helping out with a few of their horses. I also asked who all was going. Apparently my dad, mom and grandmother. Which was followed up by, whose cooking? To which Wrenlynn oh so happily piped up to say that I burn things, to which immediately signed her up for the job to which she protested about.

I couldn't help but have this nagging feeling in the back of my head telling me;

He's going to think we're the Rickman's and we're now overworking him, and we can't pay him.

We're fucked.

I laid in my bed after showering, Opal on a pile of dirty clothes on my floor, fast asleep, when my a message popped up from an unknown number

010-342-8759: Where do you keep the toilet paper?

What?

I quickly replied; "Who is this?" watching the three bubbles pop up.

010-342-8759: Harry Styles.

Oh.

OH.

Oh.

Oh my god.

I quickly changed his contact, replying "Toilet paper?"

Harry: I'm out

Me: There's none under the sink in the cabinet?

Harry: No

Me: Oh. Um.. we have some? You can come get some

The three bubbles popped up for a while before a message finally came through

Harry: I can't. I'm preoccupied

Preoccupied? Is he texting me from the toilet?

Me: Preoccupied?

Harry: Bring toilet paper over

Me: Please

Harry:

What? 

Me: Say please

Harry: Please.

I grinned, getting out of bed to grab some spare toilet paper, slipping on my flip flops and quickly leaving out the back door, Harlow eyes opening, looking at me.

"Shh" I held my finger up to my lips, slipping out the back and quickly walking down the dirt path to Harry's home.

"Landshark!" I knocked on his door, grinning as I held the toilet paper.

"It's open!" He yelled, welcoming me in.

I walked in, taking in the pull out couch that was made up for bed, the table lamp on next to it; the sheets folded over, appearing ready for Harry to crawl into. His kitchen was clean. Not a dish in sight. I scanned the floor as I slipped off my flip flops; no laundry here.

Either he didn't live here, or he was very tidy.

I looked to my right again, my eyes widening.

"Are you pooping with the door open?!" I shrieked, terrified to walk over there now.

"Toilet paper, Delaney" Harry huffed, and before I knew it, his hand poked out from the door.

Oh my god.

Oh my god.

OH MY GOD.

"I uh.. um.. I.. okay" I stuttered, quickly walking over, keeping my eyes on the ground as I shoved the bag into his hand. "I'm just gonna go" I rushed out; wondering what the fuck just happened.

Mental note; Harry needs more toilet paper.

On the side bar.

He poops with the door open?!

* * * * 

Written on: October 2nd and 7th 2023

Published on: October 8th 2023

Word Count: 3.9k

Back at the ranch, a smile tugged at my lips as Harry turned around from the sound of the truck tires on the dirt road, only to drop when he looked away.

I sighed, licking my lips before rolling them inwards, Wren snickering next to me.

"Why don't you make a move? Worst he says is no"

My nostrils flared as I looked over at her, "No? That's the worst he can say? Clearly you've never talked to that man!" 

"Laney-"

"No! He lives here Wren! I have to bring him dinner every night! I can't just knock on his door and be like 'Hey Harry, I like you. Would you like to go out sometime?' He'll kill me! You will no longer have a twin, Wren! I'll be horse food!" I freaked, hopping out of the truck, slamming the door shut before she could reply; my feet quickly carried me towards the main house, empty totes in hand when I noticed Harry was struggling to corral the sheep.

Brow furrowed, I walked over towards him, looking for the Aussies who were supposed to help him.

"Hey!" I called out, loud enough to make his head turn, "Where are the dogs? They'll do it" I asked, looking around for Milo and Daphine 

Harry ignored me, shutting the gate behind him.

Is he serious?

I eventually found the dogs, bringing them out to the pen so they could do their job. Right as I opened the gate, letting them run in, Harry yelled, "I don't need their help!", sneering at me as I shut the gate behind me. 

"You looked like you were struggling" I replied, "They can help you. It's their job"

"I'm perfectly fine on my own!" He glared, stomping over to me with his biceps flexing; completely distracting me as I watched his clothing tighten around his arms.

I wanted so badly to be held by those arms. To feel safe and secure in his hold. To lay my bed on his chest and hear his heartbeat. Or look up at him and have our eyes meet before he leaned down, kissing the top of my head.

Everything about him screamed comfort protector; even when he was acting like an asshole. 

"Yeah, looked like you really had it handled" I sarcastically replied, tired of him not letting our pets work.

They're on the farm. They have jobs. They're here to help. Let them! 

Every time I spot Harry working, there is no dog in sight. It's like they're dodging him completely. Like even the dogs know messing with Harry always ends in disaster.

"I don't need no damn dog to help me on the farm! I've done it by myself for years!" He continued to argue, completely unaware of all the hard work the Aussies were doing right behind him.

I motioned for him to turn around, Harry's jaw clenched as he turned; ready to explode at any moment.

"See. They help. All you have to do is open that gate. Why are you so stubborn about this? They're here to make your job easier; plus they love what they do!" I grinned, really wanting to shove an I told you so in his face. "And they love the meal and warm house they sleep in each night after a job well done" I reminded him, struggling to hold back the smirk my lips wanted so desperately to show, only for it to be completely wiped off my face as the ticking time bomb finally hit it's clicker.

"What's the point of working here, if these fucking dogs are just going to do my damn job?!" He snapped.

"They're literally making your job easier" I stated, "I don't understand why you're so peeved about a canine's help? Shouldn't you be glad you're not spending an hour moving sheep?"

"I don't want easier! I want my damn job" he sneered, his entire body looking like he was going to explode right in front of me. I swear I could see his forearm veins quivering. "At least at the Rickman's I knew I wouldn't lose my fucking job to some damn dog who won't live for more than what, 6 years?" He hissed, my brow furrowing.

Is he serious? 6 years? Herding dogs live 10-14 years depending on health issues.

I wanted so badly to say, "Then fucking go then!" and just get rid of all the drama in my life, but I knew how much I— we needed him. As frustrating as it was, he was getting things done around here, allowing my dad to do odd jobs in town, earning us all extra cash that was much needed.

"You have a job! You're the ranch hand, and a damn good one at that; remember? The dogs are a part of this farm. We love them. They love us, and they work just as hard as you do, if not harder! Accept help, Harry! We help each other on this farm! I don't know what the Rickman's made you do every day, but here we do things together. We work together. Whether you walk on two legs, or four paws, we work together. They had their job first, but that doesn't mean they're replacing you—"

"I can't earn my goddamn keep if I'm losing my work to some fucking animal" He interrupted. 

I could feel my breathing becoming more rushed as I started to notice  the quick spiral that was Harry Styles Emotional Tornado. 

"Okay! Okay!" I rushed, "Listen, please" I begged, noticing the familiar look of his temptation to turn around and leave us in his dust. "Herding dogs. The Aussies and Borders; they have jobs on the farm. They are also quote unquote earning their keep. They help us, the humans, make our  job easier. They get to run around and chase the cattle and sheep for us. So we're less tired during the day and because they move quicker than us. The perk of them is that they're helpful with quickening the task. They're not only helping us, but they have fun doing it. It's their job. They love it and when they're done, they retire. They work as long as they love doing it, and whenever they start to show lack of interest or are getting old, they retire. You're not being replaced, Harry. They're here to help you; not replace you. Let them help you." I urged, hoping to see some leeway, only to sigh and continue. Might as well list some perks the dogs get out of doing their jobs. "It gives them good exercise. Keeps them healthy. It tires them out physically and mentally making them better behaved in the house. It gives them purpose. They strive for a job well done just like you do. They want to make us happy. To do a good job; just like you. Am I wrong?" I asked, Harry's head shaking briefly. "You're both similar, Harry. You want to achieve the same thing and believe it or, you could both sleep in the main house but one of you decided not to. Why is that, Harry?" I asked,  praying he wasn't fed up and decided to flee right in front of my eyes again.

"Why is what?" He questioned, frustrating me.

Does he ever listen to me?

"We need to go close the gate. They're done" I noted, Harry looking over his shoulder before turning to leave, me hot on his heels as I continued; "And why won't you sleep in the main house? You act like you've been banned to the so called rabbit shack, and you act like it's some sort of punishment when it's what you wanted! Everything you have an issue with you wanted!" 

Harry stayed quiet, locking the gate as the dogs ran over to me with their tongues hanging out of their mouths. I praised them, petting them and cooing before they ran off towards the barn; Harry walked past me without saying a word. My eyes lingered on his tone back covered by a tight tan t-shirt; trailing down to his jeans, unknowingly chewing on my lower lip as I lingered on the back of his jean pockets; watching him walk away.

The things I'd do to see that man's—

"Laney!" Wren yelled, my body jumping.

'What?!"

"Mom needs your help!" God damnit. "And Harry's!" She chimed, a gleeful tone to her voice telling me she knows damn well what she's doing.

"Harry's? Why does she need both of us?" I asked, Wrenlynn shrugging. "Can you ask Harry? I'm pretty sure he hates me" I huffed/pleaded.

"No can do, Laney! I'm off to meet up with Dylan" She grinned, showing me the truck keys in her hand.

Dylan was Wrenlynn's wannabe boyfriend and she knew that; milking him of everything he was worth. It sounded bad, but she made it clear they were just friends, so as painful as I assumed that is for him to deal with, he decided it was better than being nothing. Now they hang out all the time and I'm convinced that he's just trying to woo her slowly; Wren falling for his obvious trap, getting free dinners and gifts along with it.

Harry and I walked into the garden, my mom now on the opposite side of the fertilized patches; one of the black and white bunnies hopping around, munching on the scrapes that were being tossed to her.

"You needed us?" I spoke, making her aware of our arrival; my mom's head snapping up as she nodded.

"Yes! Lane, I need you to take these to Grandma so she has them for dinner, and Harry, I wanted to ask if  there was anything you wanted planted? Anything you like having fresh?" Mom started, picking up a bin of harvested fruits and veggies, holding it up for me to take before shooing me away.

"No Ma'am, I'm okay" He replied as I grabbed the bin.

"It's no problem, truly! This is your home, Harry. We all have our things. Lane likes the lemon tree; my mom loves her carrots and strawberries. Matt loves the raspberries. I want you to have things you like in here. You sure there isn't anything?" Mom asked again, Harry's lips parting before closing again, shaking his head. "Alright, well, if you think of anything, let me know. I need to start prepping for our next big planting. Some of these plants have seen better days" She huffed, scooping up the bunny who had crawled into the bed of strawberries. "Oh! Harry, can you wash this out for me?" Mom asked, grabbing a bucket that had leftover soil in it, tapping it out over the dirt before handing it to him; "Then bring it back. I want to put scraps for the bunnies in here" Harry nodded, grabbing the bin. "Delaney, show him to the kitchen, please"

Harry and I walked down the path to the main house, my fingers turning weight  as I struggled to carry the bucket of harvestable.

"Here" Harry stated, handing me the dirty bucket.

I frowned, "I don't want your bucket. My hands are full as it is"

His eyes rolled, grumbling, "Trade me. You're struggling"

"I'm fine" I huffed, shifting the bucket up, almost losing one of the apples.

Harry stopped walking, setting the empty bucket on the ground, reaching over and grabbing the full bucket from me, "Teamwork, right?" He said, not giving me time to reply before hiking the bucket up the porch steps; "This place is a fucking shit show" I heard him mutter as I picked up the empty container.

I frowned, following him.

Why is he constantly insulting the farm? I know it isn't luxurious, but it isn't like it isn't livable, and one can argue that he has the best lodging on the entire farm! 

I quickly met up with him in the kitchen, Harry placing the container of harvestable on the counter with a huff.

"That's why I'm so jacked" I teased, turning on the tap, letting it run in the farm sink whilst I grabbed a washcloth.

"You looked like your arms were going to fall off. Do you have an ounce of muscle in you?" He asked, my head tilting.

"Is that a fat joke?" I asked, my heart starting to pick up in pace as my stomach did a whirl of disappointment.

"What? No. I mean—" He fumbled. 

My arms crossed under my boobs, "Just because I have extra weight doesn't mean I'm incapable. I was doing just fine before you came in to save the day"

"That isn't what I was saying. Look, I'm sorry—" He tried but my head shook, dismissing him as I pulled the bucket closer to me, grabbing a few of the apples I'll need for later, washing them. "Delaney" He sighed, walking around the kitchen peninsula, hovering behind me as I rinsed out the bucket. "I can do that" he reached for the bucket, my grip tightening on it as I shook my head.

"It's fine" I dismissed, expecting him to give up and go away; only be proved wrong as he turned off the  tap, my brow furrowed as I looked over at him, "What are you doing—"

"I'm sorry" He apologized, confusing me even more. 

"For?"

"I don't mean to be rude. I'm not used to the change. I'm used to doing everything by myself" He sort've confessed. 

The way he said it made it feel like he was telling me some jaw dropping news, as if I haven't picked up on that clue already.

"What are you talking about?" I asked, turning the tap back on, only for Harry to turn it back off. "Harry!" I snapped, turning it back on, Harry yet again turning it off.

"No, listen, please" He begged, shocking me.

So he does have manners.

"I'm waiting" I hummed, Harry nodding, his throat swallowing before his lips parted.

"I wasn't making  a fat joke. I was trying to joke in general. I apologize if I unintentionally hurt your feelings. You joked that that's how you got jacked, so I joked back and I can see it didn't land. I apologize" he said, looking, and sounding sincere.

I sighed, setting moms bucket in the base of the sink, "Harry, it's fine. I was slightly pulling your leg. I know I have more flab than muscle. Trust me. I live in this body. I know how it works; and the bucket was heavy. So thank you for taking it, but I carry heavy things all the time. I know people who are fit struggle to understand when someone who has more weight on them says they're comfortable in their body.... but Harry, I'm not looking to be thin. I'm looking to be healthy. Thank you for clearing up the misunderstanding though. Can I uh, ask you something?" I asked, feeling like I needed to tread the waters carefully.

He nodded, turning the tap back on to finish washing out the bucket for my mom.

"Why do you refuse  to accept help? I know you've turned away my dad, telling him you've got the jobs. You won't let the dogs help you, even though they're trained to do so, and it's beneficial for them" I commented again, Harry stilling, the washcloth frozen at the  bottom of the bucket before he moved again. "We're not the Rickman's Harry" I reminded softly, hoping I don't accidently say the wrong thing.

"If you couldn't do it alone, you weren't worth doing the job and if  you didn't do the job, you didn't earn your keep" He stated, scrubbing the bottom of the bucket harshly.

"At the Rickman's?" I questioned, Harry nodding. "What do you mean earn your keep?" I asked, backing into the corner of the counter, my hips resting against the edge.

Harry exhaled through his nose, "You earned things. They weren't given to you" He stated, rinsing out the bucket before grabbing a rag to dry it.

"Earned what?" I pressed, hoping what was popping into my head was incorrect.

"Shelter. Food. Sleep" He listed, setting the bucket on the counter, drying his hands on the rag before placing it back on the  rack.

"Harry" I sighed, wishing I could hug him, but I knew my limits, "You were given shelter. You didn't have to earn it. You're always invited to family dinner, you refuse. Why is that?" I questioned, wishing to get as much out of him as I could since he was apparently willing to talk.

"I'm not the family. I'm the employee" He  stated, "I need to get this back to your mom and go finish my work for the night. Please bring me my dinner when it's ready" He said, grabbing the bucket and leaving me standing there dumbfounded and sad.

He  had  to earn his keep. 

I knew the Rickman's overworked their employers, but I didn't know he had to quite literally earn the right to sleep.

I could feel my eyes sting with tears at the idea of him being so overworked, and then not being allowed to sleep all because of what, a job not well done? 

That evening, my mom scooped Chicken Dumplings into a soup bowl, placing a bread roll on the side of the plate that was sitting underneath before sending me on my way to deliver his food.

I hated this.

I hate walking down this stupid fucking pathway to his rabbit shack of a home with my hands burning from the hot plate or bowl of food all because he didn't want to join us, or well.. I guess doesn't feel like he has the right, no matter how many times he's invited.

I knocked on the blue door, Harry calling out that it was open, my face scrunched as I twisted the knob, walking into what appeared to be an empty living space.

"Harry?" I called out, setting the bowl on the small table.

The bathroom door opened, Harry walking out, sweatpants sitting on his hips as a new black shirt covered his torso. Hair dripping wet, his fingers running through it, shuffling it around a bit before shoving it out of his face as he walked to the table.

God he looked yummy.

I tried to inhale as he got closer, hoping to inhale the scent of whatever he just bathed in, only to just smell my mothers Chicken Dumplings.

Harry sat down, sliding the plate over to him, grabbing the spoon only to look up at me.

"What?" He asked, "Did I forget something? Your dad said it looked good" He said, more so sounding worried rather than confident that  he's done for  the day.

"No, I uh.. um.. are you sure you don't want to come over for dinner?" I tried again, Harry giving a small nod as he spooned the soup into his mouth. "You're welcomed Harry. You've always been welcomed" I continued, wishing he felt worthy of joining our family.

Harry pulled out his phone, starting to scroll through it, silently dismissing me.

I sighed, leaving his house and walking back down that stupid dirt pathway that led right back to the gray rickety wooden stairs that flexed even more under my feet.

 I grabbed my bowl, dishing up my food as my dad and Grandma sat down; my brothers asking my mother something when Mimi asked, "Harry isn't joining us?" I shook my head, grabbing a roll, dishing myself the same way my mom did for Harry.

"Do guys mind if I eat alone tonight? I just want to decompress after today" I asked, my dad and Mimi shaking their heads, Grandma too caught up in whatever my mom had just asked her.

I thanked them, slipping away and walking down the hall towards my bedroom before taking a quick right turn down a hallway, slipping out a back door and quickly walking down the same dirt pathway.

Is this a bad choice? Am I royally fucking up right now? Should I just leave him alone? He didn't seem like he wanted to be around me.

I couldn't help but think about his confession of having to earn his keep. Of not being family; just being an employee.

He was far more than an employee.

I quickly knocked on the door again, having an internal war with myself of if I should make a run for it, the blue door opening, Harry looking confused.

"Did I forget something? I can do it right now" He stated, moving to slip on his shoes.

I quickly shook my head, "No. You're done for tonight" I eased, watching him freeze, looking up from his shoes to me. 

"Then... what are you doing here?" He asked, his eyes falling on the same dinner I had just delivered, looking even more confused.

"Do you mind if I join you for dinner?"

* * * *

I'm finally hitting the point in my outline where things start moving hehe

Written on: September 25th, 26th, 27th 2023

Published on: September 27th 2023

Word Count: 3869

"I uh, hadn't gotten to it. If you give me your list, I can go real quick" I suggested, the pressure of my fingers curling into my palms distracting my mind from how annoyingly dreamy he looked standing there. 

As annoying as he was being, the sunlight shining through the big kitchen window hit the side of his face perfectly. His green eyes were shimmering, as striking as they were. They looked intimidating, yet angelic. His light tan skin contrasting against his pure white shirt gave him a honey afterglow. The tattoos on his arms popping more than ever from his summertime tan.

"Don't you know my list?" Harry asked, sounding appalled that I didn't have it memorized, snapping me out of my daydreamer gaze.

Did he typically have a pretty standardized list? Did he never want special things like snacks? or drinks? Was everything black and white to him?

"Why would I know your grocery list?" I asked, confused why he thought this was a no brainer task.

His green eyes were locked on me, my skin crawling under his gaze as anxiety crept up the back of my neck, "Where's the truck?" He finally asked, my head tilting.

"What?"

"I'll go, if we take my truck" He reiterated, not clearing my confusion up whatsoever 

"Your truck? Since when did you have a truck?" I asked, trying to recall seeing a strange vehicle in our vicinity. Harry tossed me a weird look, "What?" I asked, Harry keeping a look on his face, "What?" I repeated, my brow furrowing. "Harry? What truck?"

"What do you mean, what truck?"

What?

"I didn't know you had a truck" I continued, the puzzle pieces only becoming more scrambled in my brain.

As far as I was aware, my dad had picked Harry up in his pickup truck and there hadn't been any unknown vehicles in the normal parking spots.

"I don't" he stated, only making me even more confused.

"But—"

"I'm supposed to get one from you" His eyebrows raised, eyes squinting at his jaw clenched.

"From me?"

"Yes from you" he stated, his tone becoming more and more clipped as my confusion grew.

"But I don't have a truck?"

"What do you mean you don't have a truck?" His voice went deeper, sending a chill down my spine. He appeared to be getting aggravated, which only confused me even more. Wasn't I the one who was supposed to be losing their patience?, "Part of my agreement to work in this hell hole" hell hole? "Is that I got my own truck!" 

Huh?

"Your demands was your own residency, dinner each night and a day off a week" I replied, his clear list of demands ticking off in my own mental checklist.

"And a truck" He finished, his arms crossing over his chest, taking a few steps.

"What truck? We don't have a truck Harry" I argued, convinced this man is just penciling in new demands to milk us even more.

"Like hell there is!" his voice raised, "I need a truck, Delaney" 

Again with this Delaney thing. Can he ever say my name like he actually wants me to be here?

"Well I don't know what to tell you, Harry—"

"You're going to tell me that you have a truck for me" he once again interrupted, my lips rolling in as I replied, "Well I don't"

Harry scoffed, his boots smacking against the vinyl flooring, his arm reaching around me to open the door, practically smacking me with it; my yelp going ignored as he stormed past me.

I leaned back against the door, wincing as my head hit it a little too hard.

Good looks and a bad personality really kills a girl's late night fantasies.

A dreamy — defend you in a heartbeat — bad boy is one thing.

An arrogant ass is another.

Snatching the key off the counter again, shimming on my shoes (thankfully) and shutting the door behind me, I reluctantly followed Harry.

He was a good distance from me, a familiar yappy noise making me pick up my pace.

"What the fuck" Harry snapped, shaking his leg in front of him as my mother's chihuahua nipped at his boots. "You fucking—"

"LOUIE!" I yelled, jogging over the menace of society, snatching him up; my pointer finger lightly smacking the top of his snout as he nipped at my hand, "Bad boy!" I scolded, my heart pounding in my chest as I looked away from the four legged devil up to Harry's ready to leave scowl. "I'm so sorry!" I freaked, Harry looking at the dog, then down at his books and back to the dog before finally looking at me.

"This is why I fucking hate dogs. Look what it did to my fucking shoe" He grouched, lifting his boot off the ground, showing me the two teeth indents.

"I'm so sorry!" I apologized again, "He doesn't like strangers!" I panicked, my body tense as I stared at the puncture marks. 

This is it. This is his last straw. It has to be. Of course it was fucking Louie that had to pull it.

"He fucking bit me!" Harry snapped, glaring at me. 

"Well—"

"Well nothing! Look what that.. that rat! Did to my boot! These are expensive!" His voice began to raise as he looked back down at his shoe.

"I'll pay you back, I swear!" I panicked, Harry's entire body tense as he stared at me and the little devil held captive in my hold.

"I know you will." He hissed before continuing back down the long driveway.

"Where are you going?!" I yelled after him, awkwardly jogging after him with a dog in my arms. "Harry! Stop!"

"What!" He snapped, quickly turning around on the heel of his boot making me halt with a slight jump.

"Please don't leave! I know this sounds.. sounds pathetic, but we need you! We already paid you! You can't leave!" I begged, already imagining my dads ruthless death stare eating me alive.

"Like hell I can! This place is a dump! You got no food. No bed. No truck. All you've got is a worthless piece of property and shit animals!"

Ouch.

"Where are you going?" I asked quietly, tears threatening to fall down my cheeks as my head begin to spin attempting to process his rash reaction, "Harry?" I tried again, Harry continuing to walk down the driveway. 

I sighed, my feet dragging me after him, yet again awkwardly jogging to catch back up, my boobs jiggling causing me to slow down.

I am not wearing the right bra for running right now. Can he just stop and listen for two seconds?

"Harry! Please!" I called out again, my hand reaching out for him as my fingertips just barely grazed the fabric of his t-shirt. 

His pace picked up and I gave up, stopping my attempts as I watched him quickly walk further and further away until he rounded the corner.

What would my dad do?

I brought Louie back inside, the other dogs perking up when the front door slammed shut.

"Sorry" I mumbled to them, setting Louie on the couch next to one of our great pyrenees, smiling to myself at their size difference.  

Hopping into my Mimi's truck that we used to bring inventory to the market stall, I started the engine, cringing when it made one of those old truck noises, the key taking a few tries before it really got going.

It only took about two minutes until I spotted a figure walking down the road, my foot easing on the break as the truck slowed down next to him, my window rolling down, "Harry!" I called out, not getting anything in return. "Please don't leave. Please just get in the truck and we'll go to town" I begged, really not wanting my family to lose out on this much needed help, let alone the crazy amount of money we already gave him.

"I thought you didn't have a truck" He stated, keeping his head straight.

"We don't" I replied, Harry turning to look at me with a really look. "We don't have a truck for you" I clarified, Harry turning to look straight again. "Please! One day, that's all I'm asking and if you really hate it, I'll personally take you back to the Rickman's. Please?" I practically cried, my voice pitching higher than normal, my breath getting caught in my throat when he stopped walking, stilling for a moment before turning to face me, not saying a word as he approached the window.

"Fine, but I'm driving" he stated, my eyes widening.

"What? No!" my head shook, "This isn't even your truck"

"Take it or leave it" he stated, a sigh leaving my nose as I opened the door, hopping out and walking in front of the truck, Harry climbing in and closing the door.

"Do you even know where we're going?" I asked, slamming the door shut as I reached for my buckle.

"I've lived here for 8 years" He stated, keeping me quiet as he started to drive.

Fair enough.

The drive was uncomfortably quiet the entire way to the town's market, the two of us quickly hopping out of the car, Harry not even bothering to wait for me to catch up as he pulled open the store's door, letting it slowly close behind him.

Really?

Did he not have a mother who taught him differently? Or a father? A grandmother perhaps? Where were all of his manners? 

So it's true that all guys who look like Greek gods are assholes?

I thought people said that because they were feeling petty and revengeful; not that they held any weight with their claims.

I yanked the door open with a  huff, Harry already walking through the market.

Is he for real?

With an eye roll, I grabbed a cart, seeing he was mindlessly wandering through the store to start with.

I trailed behind him like a lost puppy, hoping he knew where he was going and we could get this over with.

I hated that I viewed hanging out with him like a task; but who wants to hang out with someone who wants nothing to do with you? Sure he's cute. He oddly enough smells good, even though I couldn't place the scent; and the slight sheen of sweat above his brown made unholy thoughts flash through my head; but his personality? It's starting to diminish any hope I had for having a chance with him. Did I even want a chance anymore? 

"What do you need? Maybe we can tag team it?" I offered, not wanting to annoy this man more than I already have. "Harry?" I called out, the silence on his end becoming aggravating. I stayed quiet, hoping he would just start putting things in the cart, and maybe he just didn't want any small talk; but we walked up and down a few aisles that felt somewhat important. Things like dry cereal and granola bars, drink mixes and even the produce section, he never stopped.

Maybe he's a freezer meal kinda guy?

We reached the dairy section, the town's fresh milk sitting on display, Harry just staring at it, "We have milk at home, Harry. You don't have to buy any" I reminded, Harry giving another curt nod, continuing his walk past the cheeses and finally meeting the freezer section.

Finally, he walked down the aisle keeping to himself as I trailed behind, the two of us reaching yet another end of an aisle with a still empty cart.

"Is this not where you normally do your shopping?" I asked, my forearms crossed over the bar of the cart; my body weight hunched forward as I watched him just stand there, seeming completely out of place.

"I don't know" he replied, my eyes squinting.

What was this guy's problem?

"Okay.. Well, these are your options unless you want to go to some of the stalls, but those won't get you things like meat and dry goods" I informed, deciding to ignore his standoffish behavior and treat it like he's new in town. "Do you want freezer meals?" I asked, figuring we had to start somewhere if we were going to leave this store with a fridge full of food.

"You're supposed to make me dinner" He replied, my cheeks puffing as I blew out air, a short nod being a response as I decided to peruse our options.

"Are you a meat and potatoes kind of guy?" I questioned, the scowl not leaving Harry's face. He stayed silent so I took a different approach, "What would you like for dinners? What meals should we make? Any preferences?" I asked, confused why he isn't offering me any help here. It was for him, after all. Why doesn't he have any opinions?

With more annoyance building in my chest, I grabbed a tub of homemade vanilla ice cream, plopping it in the cart, passing Harry as I started grabbing staples off shelves.

Fresh farm eggs, sliced cheese, butter, a box of boring person cereal — seemed fitting, along with things like bread and a package of wrapped hotdogs.

We got to the condiments, grabbing things like ketchup, mustard, mayo and barbeque sauce. When I reached the jelly's, I raised an eyebrow at Harry, although he appeared to be distracted, my eyes rolling as I grabbed Grape jelly preserves and prayed it was good enough.

 With peanut butter in hand, Harry finally spoke up, "I'm allergic" he stated, my body freezing.

Oh

That would've been good to tell me before you left shopping for you in my hands.

I placed the peanut butter back on the shelf with a nod.

"See anything that looks good?" I asked, coming up on a small dessert table.

A few of our things were there, like the brownies I had intended to be for Harry, my Mimi's amazing apple crisp bars and even our neighbors yummy lemon poppyseed muffins.

I watched him look over the table before shaking his head, a sting of hurt hitting my chest, but I shook it off, mentioning "If there is something you'd like, let me know! We can always make it" my offer stopping him in his tracks, his lips parting like he was going to say something before they closed again and we walked to checkout

Harry grabbed the grocery bags, leaving me in his dust as he walked pack to the truck.

The ride back was just as quiet as the ride there.

I turned on the radio, hoping to disperse the awkward silence. I hummed along to Leave The Night On by Sam Hunt, my eyes locked on the fields and ranches that passed by as the truck bounced against the rough rock and gravel back to home sweet home.

"I've got it" Harry grumbled, taking all of the grocery bags before my fingers could even graze a shopping bag.

I hopped out of the truck, quickly being met with Knox, one of our Border Collies, and Felix, one of our Great Pyrenees, happily greeting me, almost knocking me over as they fought for my attention and pets.

The two dogs followed me down the pathway to Harry's house, Harry once again struggling with the key; my body struggling to withhold the giggle that so desperately wanted to escape, watching the front door finally push open, the dogs hot on my heels.

"No dogs" Harry's head shook, a frown on my face.

"Why? They've done nothing wrong" 

"No dogs" He repeated, shutting the door practically on my face.

I glared at the navy blue front door, looking down at the dogs.

"He's a bully isn't he" I spoke in a baby voice, crouching to scratch Knox's head, placing a kiss on top of his snoot. "Don't worry, we'll break him in and he won't be able to stop cuddling your precious face" I grinned, peppering his head with kisses before getting back up, opening the front door again and shamefully closing it in front of the loving herding dog.

Harry really is a piece of shit for making me lock out my dog from his house I mentally huffed, slipping my shoes off so I could help him put things away. Not like he deserved it.

"So you're allergic to peanuts?" I decided to ask, making a mental note to tell my mother so we don't have an ER trip that is way too far for something as serious as a peanut allergy.

Harry hummed, not offering me anything else to work with.

"Ya know, Wren, my twin sister, she used to tell people she was allergic to Bananas just because she didn't like them" I giggled, remembering the countless times mom reprimanded her for using something like a food allergy that was a very serious thing, just to get out of eating our late grandma's Banana Cream Pie.

"I'm not faking" is all he replied with, my head quickly nodding.

"Yeah, yeah, figured, just.. thought it would be funny— actually, I don't know why I told you that, I'm sorry. Peanut Allergies are life threatening, what she did was wrong" I corrected, embarrassment rushing through my veins as I wanted to curl into a ball and hide from what felt like this man who took up more space in this small living space than he actually physically did. "So.." I continued awkwardly, watching Harry stuff the plastic bags into a drawer, "What do you eat instead of PB+J's?"

"What?" He replied, turning to face me.

"Ya know.. since you're allergic and all" I shrugged, chewing on my lower lip.

"Like as a kid?" He asked, surprising me, but I kept my face stoic as I nodded, "Anything that didn't contain peanuts" he replied like a smartass, frustrating me as the insufferable silence reared its ugly head yet again.

This man was impossible to talk to.

"Well.." I looked around, "Need any help setting up your bed or anything?" I asked, walking over towards his pull out bed.

"I'm fine" he replied, right as I went to speak.

"Because ya know, I can help get the sheets and stuff— oh, yeah, that's uh.. good. Um.. I guess I'll just uh, leave you to it then. Um.. feel free to stop by the main house if you need anything. The only threat there is Louie" I giggled, hoping to break the ice, but Harry clearly didn't find it very funny since he continued to just stare at me.

I head back towards the door, slipping my shoes back on, hating the way he was just starting at me like I was some unwanted guest in the house I fucking cleaned and furnished for him.

"Oh!" I spun around, my hand dropping from the doorknob, "Will you be joining us for dinner?" I asked, hoping by him immersing himself in my family, things will start to fell a little more normal, but much to my dismay, Harry's head shook.

"You can just bring it to the door" He stated, my dreams getting crushed instantly.

I just nodded slowly before leaving, practically dragging my feet back to the main house, dogs hot on my heels as I stomped up the rickety wooden stairs, ready to forget this day ever happened.

My mother called us to dinner. The pot of Goulash; elbow noodles, ground beef, and mixed vegetables, sat in the middle of the table, surrounded by dinner plates.

"Will Harry be joining us?" Mom asked, my head shaking as I grabbed his plate, dishing up his food in a lull manner. "Oh, that's too bad. Maybe next time" She smiled, starting to prepare my younger brother's plates, the sound of them coming in as the wooden storm door shut, filling the quiet room with chatter, stopping in their tracks as she reminded them to wash up.

"I'm just going to bring this to him whilst it's still warm" I informed, knowing better than trying to get Wren to do it.

I knocked on Harry's door, the hot plate slightly burning my hands, the fork tempting my patience as it kept sliding against the glass plate, countlessly almost falling to the ground.

The door opened, a smile plastered on my face as I greeted him, "My mom made goulash" I shoved the plate towards him, Harry eyeing it before grabbing in and closing the door on me.

I stared at the door in astonishment.

No thank you? No comments or opinions? Just a door to the face?

I was starting to regret putting in so much effort for this asshole of a Rancher.

It's not like he fucking deserves it when he doesn't even know how to hold a door open for a girl, or say thank you when she delivers dinner to him.

With flared nostrils and pursed lips, I quickly walked back to the main house, the storm door slamming closed, rattling the framing as I grumpily walked back into the kitchen, taking my seat at the table.

"Deliver the food okay?" Mom asked, my quick nod raising an eyebrow from her, but she thankfully left it alone.

"So, Delaney," Grandma smiled, "Tell me about your day, honey. How'd it go with the new Rancher?"

* * * * 

Written on: August 7th, 8th, 10th, September 8th 2023

Published on: September 8th 2023

Word Count: 3.9k