#harm-o

Hello! I’ve not had much experience with it though it has occasionally tried to get into my head. Luckily I’ve got ERP down pretty well by now as well as ACT, so new themes don’t tend to stick for long.

It sounds riskier than it is, but trust me when I say to trust yourself. Exposure works wonders for this theme just like any other. Whatever makes you feel uncomfortable needs to be tackled head on. If you fear you’re going to stab someone, make a meal with a fellow family member. You’re not going to act on these thoughts because they’re ego-dystonic (the opposite of your true character), but your mind won’t believe that until you prove it to yourself.

For me, Harm OCD has kicked in when my girlfriend and I play fight (I always fear getting too aggressive). However I trust myself I’d never actually harm her and now I don’t get nervous about it.

I can link you to certain websites that give detailed information about Harm-O, such as:

http://www.ocdla.com/blog/harm-ocd-1-1488

http://harmocd.com/

and

http://www.steveseay.com/aggressive-obsessions-fear-of-harming-killing-others/

Also, I'd like to say that it's wonderful that you want to help him and understand what he's going through. A basic thing about Harm-O sufferers is that they're probably the most non-violent people. The fact that they fear harming others and they receive panic attacks in response to the violent thoughts they get is very important.

Try to comfort your husband and make him talk about what he's going through. I know from personal experience that it does help when somebody listens to you, doesn't judge you and supports you. It's a huge relief for every OCD-sufferer. 

Do the thoughts that 'dare' you scare you and lead you to avoid certain situations because you fear you'll act on them? If so that's a pretty surefire sign of Harm-O and I definitely recommend going to see your GP for a referral.

To clarify, you're a victim and not a hazard to anybody. There's a fair set of resources on here that will hopefully help you understand your behaviour and give you the knowledge you need to break the OCD cycle. However my word is not enough for a diagnosis, hence why I recommend you seeing a professional.

That means the world to me! Thank you. I'm doing well as far as OCD/Pure-O is concerned. I'm worrying if I'm suffering from co-morbidity though, particularly depression. Gonna definitely get it looked into though so no worries. :)

As far as the self-harm obsession goes, you've definitely got the right idea with resisting the urge to check. If you want to go a step further, then mock the thoughts and encourage more of them, but start by resisting any compulsive urges and see if the anxiety dies down and the thoughts decrease. Encouraging the thoughts isn't necessary, but it's a way of 'speeding up' progress at the expense of tougher spikes/exposure.

That's a classic example of Harm-O.

I'll tell you it once because anything past that is reassurance; you are not a threat to anyone. People with OCD/Pure-O don't act on their 'urges' because they're intrusive and the opposite of their personality. That's why they're initially scary until they're understood. It screws around with feelings hence your analysing but you're not going to hurt anybody even if it feels like you're determined to do so. You have to trust me there.

As for realising an intrusive, they're unwanted. They come out of the blue, at first cause an anxiety response until they're understood and are normally pretty wild in terms of what they're about. Everybody gets them. The issue lies in the response we give 'em!