#hammelat

Tati (playing Seraph): I take a deep breath and say, "We wish for you to bring us the true phylactery of Larissa Firespit containing her immortal soul."

DM: Hammelat nods and says, "Very well." A few hours later-

Adam (playing Billie): Hours?? What a rubbish djinn.

Tati: He has to go dig for it, it could be anywhere in her tomb. Or not even in her tomb at all!

Adam: Still.

DM: A few hours later Hammelat returns with a very intricate ceramic box.

Adam: "Is this the real phylactery? No more decoys?"

DM: They say, "That is what you wished for, so that is what I had to do. I could not have returned until I had succeeded."

Tati: I'd like to make a Religion check on the box. Thaddeus too.

Hamish (playing Thaddeus): Okay.

Marijn (playing Godric): And an Arcana check.

DM: This box is boiling with dark magic. There's nothing else it could be.

Adam: I say to Hammelat, "Thanks. We'll call again if we need you."

DM: Hammelat booms, "I am a being of air and magic."

Billie: ...

DM: They say in a slightly smaller voice, "Yes, I would like some fresh air."

Una (genasi artificer): What's it like inside the lamp?

DM: They ask, "Have you ever been inside a Bag of Holding?"

Una: Oh, yeah.

Billie: Not fun.

Thaddeus (khajiit paladin): Are you aware of your surroundings?

DM: "Somewhat. I hear if you call my name, for instance."

Una: Is it annoying when I rub the lamp? Does it squeak?

DM: "No."

Billie: Do you eat and drink? Can I get you anything?

DM: They squint at you for a moment. "This would be given freely, not in exchange for favours."

Billie: Of course! I just always feed a guest.

DM: "...Do they still have scrambled eggs on this plane?"

Billie: Yes! Toast?

DM: "Yes please."

Andy (playing Una): I ask, "What's your name?"

DM: "Hammelat."

Hamish (playing Thaddeus): I ask, "Pronouns?"

DM: "Meaningless for an elemental being."

Andy: I love them already. "What's your story?"

DM: They say, "My kind were punished by the gods for our part in the Dawn War. I was bound to this bottle until I have granted five wishes or favours to mortals."

Hamish: "How many are left?"

DM: "Two."

Hamish: "What's your favourite wish you've granted?"

DM: They smile fondly. "I was tasked to slaughter a family of nobles for a rival family. The bloodshed was glorious."

Andy: Ooh! "What was the family's name??"

DM: It can't be Diana's eladrin nobles, they died too recently.

Andy: Aww.

DM: The djinn answers, "Cleaves."

Tati (playing Seraph): *slams fist on table*

DM: You're not here.

Tati: *grits teeth*

Hamish: What??

Tati (playing Seraph): I say, "Sorry to be cryptic. We have a question about your past-"

M (playing Kjell): "Were your whole family horribly murdered by a djinn?"

Tati: *glares*

DM: Maria takes a moment.

Adam (playing Billie): "We have a bottled djinn in our possession, and it claims to have killed a noble family called Cleaves a long time ago."

DM: She pulls out a chair and doesn't quite collapse into it, but sits heavily. She looks at Billie. "How did you come by this object?"

M: "The God and the God."

DM: She almost rolls her eyes. "Of course."

Tati: "I'm sorry."

M: "Was it your family?"

DM: "What does this djinn look like?"

Andy (playing Una): "Big and blue. Their name is Hammelat."

DM: She breathes out. "Hammelat. Yes, my entire family was murdered by this djinn. Including me, after a fashion. May I have the lamp?"

Tati: I ask, "If you're going to kill the djinn, would you like help?"

DM: She says, "I don't need help."

Tati: "I didn't ask if you needed help."

Andy: I say loudly, "It's not the djinn's fault, it's a slave."

M: "Killing it won't help."

Adam: "Can we circle back to how you died but you're still alive?"

DM: She looks coolly at Billie. "No, we're not going to circle back to that at this time." Then she looks sadly at Una and Kjell. "Maybe you're right. I've been running from or toward this for so long, but revenge so rarely brings any kind of closure. It wasn't the djinn's fault."

Andy: "Who called out the hit on your family?"

DM: "House Damalan, a bloodline that ended a long, long time ago."

Hamish (playing Thaddeus): "At your hand?"

DM: She ignores that.

Andy: "Why did they want your family dead? What was the feud?"

DM: She becomes sad again. "Land disputes, I think. It's hard to remember. I was very young at the time."

Hamish: "Define young."

DM: "Perhaps ten."

Hamish: "Oh. And you somehow survived death??"

Adam: "How old are you really??"

M: Don't ask a woman that!!

Hamish: History check on the last record of House Damalan.

DM: You have never seen any record of them.

Travelling Trauma Centre cooked a terrible meal to help a ghost fulfil its dying wish, then went looking for pumpkins to make pie for Galwyn. The only place to get pumpkins this time of year is the magical Autumn Forest, but the party will have to do a favour for the druids who own the grove.

M (playing Kjell): "Uh..."

Tati (playing Seraph): "Is... that a problem?"

Andy (playing Una): I wave and say, "Hi guys, this is Hammelat!"

M: I ask, "How did we meet Hammelat?"

Andy: "I got their lamp from The God and the God ages ago but then we totally had to deal with a mindflayer and Demogorgon and forgot."

M: "Oh yeah, now that you mention it I remember."

Adam (playing Billie): I come out in an apron with another helping of food. "Hi! Do you guys want eggs too?"

M: "I won't say no."

Hamish (playing Thaddeus): "So Hammelat has two more wishes or favours to give, and once they've given all their wishes they'll be free."

Tati: I say, "We could wish to have Larissa's real phylactery in our possession. Then when she comes to pick a fight with us we can destroy it straight away! It would save us having to search the tomb and we'd bypass any more decoys or traps."

Andy: That's actually... a really decent idea.

Hamish: *side-eyeing Tati* "Hammelat has given some interesting favours in the past."

M: "What like?"

Adam: "Tell us about that family you killed again."

DM: *rolls eyes* Hammelat polishes off a slice of toast and recounts with relish, "I was commanded to destroy a noble family called Cleaves at the behest of another noble family, which I did with great skill and enjoyment."

Tati: I stiffen.

DM: Bluff check.

Tati: Fuck, I rolled a 7. 29.

DM: The djinn turns to you slowly. "What does that mean to you, small siren?"

Tati: I say slowly, "I just don't like the idea of taking sport in killing, no matter your reason for doing it."

Hamish: Now I'd like to make a History check.

DM: It's a really low DC. Maria's last name is Cleaves.

Hamish: Ohhh.

DM: Hammelat says, "The first was wealth."

Adam: "Pretty classic."

DM: "The third was to slay a wizard."

Adam: "Is there, like, a refractory period between wishes? Or could we use the last two today and send you on your way?"

DM: They say, "There is no cooldown period."

Adam: Huh, I wonder why nobody's ever done that.

Andy (playing Una): I ask, "Have you ever met another djinn?"

DM: "Only one other since being bound like this. When I was sent to slay the wizard, he too had a lamp."

Andy: Oh, no...

DM: "I am still here. The wish was granted."

Hamish (playing Thaddeus): I say, "We got your lamp from The God and the God."

DM: They say, "You mean my previous owners, the original elves?"

Andy: *frowns* "What do you mean by 'original elves'?"

DM: Hammelat says, "They are the prototypes. The first two that Corellon made in his image."

Hamish: Oh, shit. They must be pretty powerful.

Adam: Fuck. We've been pretty rude to them.

Hamish: They did screw up pretty badly.

Andy: I ask, "Were they the ones who sent you after the wizard?"

DM: "No. They never used my power, only held me for a time."