#guardian1

“Thirteen Ways to Say Goodnight” by Guardian1 (ffnet)

i know this isn't directly related but i'd like to know what influences lead to spiderflowers assumed creation of merryshipping and what lead her to write 5s bad company since i cant ask her, can i? and maybe youre curious too. control f "spiderflower" to get to her segments of the linked journal entries.

for those who havent read it, heres her fanfiction.net bio, which also advertises her bisexuality openly. (her bisexuality for usopp and nami god she's the most relatable woman on earth)

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На Amazon пополнились запасы Amiibo The Legend Of Zelda Guardian 1

This is the Fremarant fic to me. Or at least, the one that I always end up going back to, rereading over and over and over. It also happens to be the most fucking depressing story, and one of the many that hasn't updated in years, and probably won't any longer, but still works in its way.

I reread it this morning because my mom was recording a song she had written and wanted me to be quiet, and I must be PMSing or something, but I started tearing up, despite having read this thing a million times.

It was when I hit this passage in Chapter 1:

"She'll like that. I'm glad you dropped in on me." She took a quiet breath and rested her head back on the chair, looking at him pointedly, the gaiety in her eyes dropping as her mouth grew tense. "Amarant, I want to ask you something."

The big man stared at her, arms folding across his chest. "What?"

"Why did you go away?"

His body language tensed, and she winced inwardly. She was always too direct. If only Zidane was here; he would have wormed it out of him in a less tactless way than she had always been accustomed to. Garnet had always had trouble dealing with Amarant.

"Why d'you want to know?"

"Because of what happened afterwards," she said honestly.

Fingers gripped the edge of his chair, tightening surrepticiously. He would not show weakness in front of her. "What happened afterwards?"

Head dropping, she stared down at her lap, eyes closing as the grief washed over her all over again. "... I knew you didn't know."

"Damnit, Garnet, what the fuck happened afterwards?" Amarant stiffened as if remembering something, and shook his head to clear it. "Freya - what'd Freya say? If you don't tell me, I'll damn well go to her, whether she wants to tell me or not. Don't beat around the bloody bush with me - "

"You won't, Amarant." Her tone was infinitely gentle. "Freya's dead."

"...what?"

There was a horrific sort of everything in that single sound, written on his face, burnt in his eyes - if she had taken the time out to separate them all it would have taken years. This was the hardest thing she'd ever had to do and the grief she felt had suddenly been broke open once more, losing the incredibly dear Burmecian dragoon. It had been so unbearably pointless. "She died a year or so after you left."

"Somebody killed her." His voice was numb. Apathetic.

"No." Garnet shook her head. "Childbirth. We knew you - didn't know - because you didn't show up to her wedding and we thought well, maybe, that's just your way... but then, when you didn't show up to her funeral, that's when Steiner thought you must have died somewhere..."

"Childbirth."

He hadn't realized that he'd spat the word aloud until the little queen answered him. "Her first. Something went wrong - she... bled to death. I tried to save her, but..."

Freya died in a bed, Amarant thought. She died knowing for hours and hours and hours she was slowly wasting away and so that this girl can tell me very gently that she is gone.

And then SO MANY THINGS in the chapters after that too, told in flashbacks and Amarant's dealings with Fratley and and and

Seriously. Favorite heartbreaking fic. I can't help it.

Read it if you like the pairing (or if you're curious in general) if you haven't.