#grrlgeek72

A day in the life ...

“The PROBLEM is you told her boxing was the road to ‘the aviation attitude.’” Bit Lockhardt let his annoyance show as Fitz’s smug face grinned back at him through the Skype connection. “Now she’s all obsessed about learning to box.”

“And it is.” Fitz leaned back in what looked like an office chair. Clearly she wasn’t on a mission, her missions didn’t involve clean hotel rooms and Skype. Of course, neither had his. “Nothing like being up close and personal with someone who wants to cause you pain to test your poise under pressure.”

“But she’s the ef —” He bit back the curse, then he remembered who he was talking to “ —fucking Princess. She needs her face unbruised — unbroken. And all of her brain cells healthy.”

“Boxing didn’t hurt my stunning visage.” Fitz drew a circle in the air around her face and then posed with her hands under her chin. Damn woman even batted her eyelashes.

“Because you have those long monkey arms and no good sense anyway.  Arendelle’s what? Tit high on you?”

“At least shoulder.”

“And God help me when Queen Elsa finds out,” Bit moaned.

Fitz expression turned from a smirk to earnest excitement faster than Bit could blink. She even blushed a little. It was an unnerving sight on the cockiest woman — no person — he knew. “Speaking of ….” She started hesitantly.

“No. I am not funneling you any “candid pix” of the Queen of Arendelle for you to decorate your locker with or — or god knows what.”

“I am not that sort of woman,” Fitz sniffed. “Besides it’s better if you get a real person to wear a blonde wig.”

Bit nearly swallowed his tongue. “And now, I can NOT unsee that.”

“Love you like a brother.  And if I had one I might share with him, too.”

“Why do I even answer your calls?” Bit reached his hand toward his touch screen. “Listen, I gotta go. There’s a state dinner tonight. Duty calls.”

“You mean you didn’t wear that tux just for me? Now I’m wounded.”

Bit shook his head. “Goodbye, Fitz.”

“Wait, wait — just, you know, let her uh, Elsa, know I would be happy to give the LT some personal flight training. Training from the best damn helicopter pilot in the whole wide world. She just has to say the word and maybe put in for a TDA request.”

“Hang it up and goodbye, Fitz.” Bit answered.

“Night Stalkers never quit!” Fitz shot back as the screen went black.

Bit chuckled to himself as he closed up his laptop and finished getting dressed. He had learned that once you put on your pants and your jacket sitting was no longer an option, not if you wanted to remain wrinkle free. And he would be damned if he let Revel look more put together than he did. It was a point of pride. He might have the active get-into-trouble-while-running-through-Arendelle’s-countryside Princess while Revel’s job came with permanent air conditioning, but Anna’s “special attache” as they called him, would look just as good as the Queen’s.

This job, special attache, or really babysitter in chief for the Princess of Arendelle, wasn’t the hardest job he’d ever had, if hard meant risk of dying or worse. But it was the strangest and possibly the roughest on his nerves. Kosovo, Somalia, Iraq, Afghanistan, CAR, none of his previous duty stations had held the challenges that came with keeping up with and not losing sight of one short red-headed princess. Plus there were things he would never get used to like the fact that he owned two tuxes now. The suits that he wore every day weren’t bad, like a uniform of sorts.  In fact Anna had laughed when she saw his closet of six identical gray suits each a hand’s width apart from six identical blue shirts. He also had drawers full of blue polos and matching khakis for days when Anna was letting her hair down or just moving at her normal faster than light speed. Fortunately blue socks and well-shined black oxfords went with everything. Well, tonight he had on black socks.

Bit gave himself one last look in the mirror and nodded. He did look good in this suit, though.

His room was on the same hall, almost next to Anna’s, so it was a short walk to knock on her door. He glanced at the expensive gold watch on his wrist, a gift from the Queen and valued at more than his yearly salary, and headed out into the hall to get the Princess going.

This was the reason Elsa had given him the watch, or at least what she told him. Royal protocol required that the Queen be the last to enter any room or gathering so that everyone in attendance could stand and bow if appropriate. Apparently Elsa had gotten very tired of waiting somewhere out of the way but near the engagement she was supposed to be at for her sister. Even now it took Bit’s best efforts to make that wait shorter if not exactly non-existent.

He knocked and immediately one of Anna’s lady’s maids opened the door.

“It’s Sir Edward, Your Highness,” she called back over her shoulder.  The first time someone had called him “Sir Edward” he had spent a good five minutes looking around to see who that was. “What shall I tell him?”

“Tell him to get his butt in here and help!” Anna sounded frazzled and distracted even for Anna.

“Your Highness, it’s ti …..” Bit stopped mid sentence as he took in the sight before him. Anna wasn’t fully dressed, in fact she hadn’t even put on her dress yet. He knew that because one maid was holding it out for her. Another maid was rummaging through Anna’s closet, at least that’s what he thought was happening. Anna’s closet looked like someone had taken a store full of dresses and stuffed them all in at once. One pair of sensible shoes and one pair of stocking feet protruded from under the bed.

“Hey, Sergeant!” Anna’s voiced called out. Then there was an audible clunk and the bed jerked upward. “Ow! Shit! Fuck!”

“Your Highness,” one maid answered, “Language.”

The one in the closet added, “Your hair, watch your hair. Please.”

Anna shimmied out from under the bed holding her head. She was in a variety of constraining undergarments and a slip. She thrust the top of her head toward Bit. “It’s not bleeding is it? Tell me it’s not bleeding.”

“It’s not bleeding, Your Highness.” Bit was torn between laughter and tears. Elsa was no doubt already downstairs waiting.

“Oh, stop. Everyone calls me that here.”

“It’s still not bleeding, LT.”

“Better.” Anna whirled around and helped up the maid who had just emerged from under her bed. “Listen.  I don’t know where I left them, and we can’t find them, but Elsa has a great pair of green heels, and I know she’s not wearing them tonight. Go run down and ask her if I can borrow them, please.”

“Um, I don’t think she’s …” the maid looked to Lockhardt for help.

“The Queen is not going to be in her room.” He pointed at the time on his watch.

“It’s that late, oh shit, shit, shit!”

“Language.”

“Put your arms up, and we can put on this dress.”

Anna came to a decision and put her arms up. “OK, run down and get them.”

“Your Highness?”

“What? It’s not like she needs them now. I need them now. This is about the greater need. And besides if she tries to execute you for stealing from the crown, I’ll pardon you or something. Just go. Go. Go. Please.”

“I’ll go.” Bit was more than willing to risk execution, or more likely the Queen’s frosty ire, to get his charge down where she needed to be sometime before midnight.

Elsa’s suite wasn’t much farther away from her sister’s than his own, and he moved briskly. He knocked on the outer door. When no one answered, he opened it and walked through the sitting room to the door to Elsa’s bedroom. He knocked again. He was just opening it when he felt the temperature drop. He turned smoothly and gave a short neck bow.

“She’s not ready is she?”  Elsa was smiling, but she was also throttling the itinerary she had in her hand like she was wringing a chicken’s neck. Except Lockhardt figured she wasn’t thinking of a chicken.

“No, ma’am.” He took a breath. “And she was hoping to borrow your green heels.”

“Again!”

“It’s probably not completely necessary.” Bit answered deadpan. “I did see her combat boots near the door, ma’am.”

“Right.” Then Elsa laughed. Bit never did see why people found the Queen so intimidating, but he did love to hear her laugh. “Fine.” She turned to her maid. “Third pair on the left on the second shelf.”